Basically, back in OT biblical times during the Bronze Age and Iron Age, everybody in the deserts was inventing, trading, sharing and getting gods all over the place…”You get a god!, and you get a god!, and hey you there you get a god too!…everybody gets a god!”. However some gods were warrior deities, some were volcano gods and/or storm gods and weather gods, some were a god of a particular mountain, some gods were married and some were even women, and some such as the new on the scene biblical Yahweh-Jehovah godling eventually changed their names (primarily from “El” which will be explained later) and progressively mutated thanks to the priests, gurus and scribes who were inventing him and applying various Thanosian powers, failed predictions and long-winded speeches (however many of the godling’s previous powers, pagan traits and human attributes still remained including having arms, feet, legs, nostrils etc, and yes even a penis…which is not the least bit surprising as the texts and “script”-tures were written by anonymous men who invented the new tribal clan godling), knowing this let’s take a brief look at who was who back in them Bronze-Iron Age magical hocus pocus Levant deserts times and see if those gods are really still around today as some proclaim and insist or were they really even real ever at all in the first place, i.e. – are they really or really not?, and who exactly are “they” really supposed to be anyway?
This brief blog post was some interesting information I came across which is connected to and explores further a few things I mentioned at my first post on this blog at “National Security Alert: Foreign Telescamvangelists, Cults, Sects“. Namely, about the real Bronze Age and Iron Age origins of later Abrahamic religions and their various cosmological views and worldviews, their mutating abstract concepts, primitive behaviorisms, desert blood magic and legends and mythologies etc. Things, evidences and truths that are never mentioned or discussed in front of pews and especially by televangelists to their mesmerized audiences and minions fans.
In this instance just about the earliest evidences that the Jewish tribal desert Yahweh-Jehovah cacodemon godling is proven to be just religious syncretism fiction and mythologies (not surprisingly and quite common in those lands and times of flat earths, talking animals, world’s best hocus pocus magicians and no internets), but also originally was married, see Yahweh and his Asherah links to find out more. (According to all the known facts and evidences most probably being invented and born into existence and then joining an already existing deities pantheon around the 9th century BCE in ancient Canaan as a local tribal warrior deity/storm god (as well as a volcano god), which explains this post title, although “…For I Don’t Know..”Or Care”..If They Exist” could also apply, because it simply had no interest or clearly didn’t even know anything whatsoever, about any people or nations or anything happening on the planet outside a 250 km radius from Jerusalem, and why would this be?…very simply because from the very start of the stories and fictional narratives it was a completely 100% local ethnocentric tribal deity, that is the facts ipso facto, see included map below)…
…because you have to admit it’s pretty hard to be taken seriously as a god of the world and planet and universe if you only hang and float around and vacation from your throne only in the exact same small area all the time and absolutely nowhere else…ever, and on top of that to strangely show up only occasionally as a puff of smoke in a traveling tent in the desert to mainly require and enjoy the aromas of numerous burnt animals sacrifices, when not smiting Israelites and foreigners back and forth that is. Basically, according to the written texts sources, then the Jesus character’s skydaddy really doesn’t come across as all that impressive, all-wise, all-powerful, all-knowing and definitely not omnipresent, instead he/it comes across much more like a Bronze-Iron Age locally invented tribal genie-deity, which is precisely the case as will be unequivocally shown with evidences.
Yep, surely shocking probably to most pew potatoes who nod and agree about stuff being told and not even knowing who, when, why or where the stuff originates from and most of the time what it even really means and who it was actually really meant for, happy-clappy televangelist supporters and many others who probably think all the biblical stories are actually real history and verified facts, real magical superheroes and real hocus pocus blood magic shenanigans and abstract concepts intended for you the reader and every other person on the planet, because nothing could be further from the truth or more absurd.
Yep, just like the fact that most believers would be shocked to know, such as the fact that the “Satan” character people think they know about today, actually started out as a personality trait of the desert Yahweh-Jehovah Cacodemon God and as his personal friend helper, then turned into an angel agent who personally works for and carries out punishments and suffering “for” God with his full support, then as a position of authority to be an accuser and adversary of humans as “god’s personal prosecuting attorney”, later he becomes a metaphor and symbolic representation of innate human qualities, and only much later still he is transformed into a powerful separate entity with a powerful kingdom and armies of his own angels who took his side (because the greatest minds and thinkers in history are always in the minority not the majority as the saying goes), having his own vast realms and even authority as Lord of the Earth and visible world (eventually mutated over time and given horns, cloven hooves feet, pointy tail, red face, knobby knees, pointy chin and ears, goatee, bad breath, pitchfork, echoing laugh and sometimes even a nefarious cape etc), the included video below explains more about that. And that even the very first time that Satan appears as a proper noun and an actual separate entity in the OT text during the book of Job fable, he is in fact NOT an enemy but is instead a helper and teammates with the Yahweh-Jehovah deity character because they are in fact both on the same team (the original Hebrew in Job 1:6 makes this unequivocal where Satan is described as clearly being one of the “70 Sons of God”, aka the Divine Council…”Now it fell upon a day, that the sons of God (the desert cacodemon godling) came to present themselves before the Lord, and Satan was among them”, however this is before he was mutated by later anonymous writers, priestly scribes and inventors by starting to grow horns, a tail, pointy ears and cloven hooves feet etc, and used as an integral focal point and important selling point for televangelist’s tax-free faith seed shekels donations and expense accounts especially, and books and DVDs also of course, see also previous post excerpt for shocking detailed proof).
Well, just like that case, most believers would likewise be shocked to know that the “Yahweh” god was already a known worshipped deity by many tribal groups in ancient Canaan going back many centuries long before the new on the scene Israelites came into existence. Actually, a large number of biblical scholars, researchers and archaeologists from over the last century especially agree and have put forward undeniable evidences that the origins of the Israelites is from Canaanite origins, which is really not surprising and today is the majority consensus view even by many Jewish researchers and scholars. The culture of the earliest Israelite settlements in the land of Canaan and their cult-objects are clearly those of the Canaanite god El, also in the Hebrew bible it is the name El (Elyon, Elohim, El Roi, El Shaddai and sometimes Baal and even others) used many times when talking about their god Yahweh-Jehovah, it all points to the very evident and not surprising very common proven process of Canaanite religious syncretism, as well as cultural diffusion.
“El” was the original first god of the Israelites before Yahweh, it is El, the head of the Canaanite pantheon, whose name forms the basis of the name “Israel” which literally means “fighter against god” or “the one who fights/wrestles against god” (and many other names such as Gabri-el, Ezeki-el, Immanu-el, Beth-el, Samu-el, Ishma-el, Michae-el, El-isha, Nethani-el, Haza-el and many other names and words) and none of the Old Testament patriarchs, the tribes of Israel, the Judges, or the earliest monarchs, have a Yahwistic theophoric name (i.e. – one incorporating the name of Yahweh).
Before desert cacodemon deity Yahweh-Jehovah was invented circa. 9th century BCE, El, aka “King of the Gods”, was the main chief god worshipped by the Israelites in the OT texts, as well as by a number of Canaanite and Levant region tribes and peoples, and the origins of El are from ancient Mesopotamia (which would mean that today’s Abrahamic religions main personal cosmic genie skydaddy is actually ultimately Mesopotamian, before mutating to the Zoroastrian inspired Yahweh tribal deity, seen above sitting on his throne as usual).
Since Israelites were indigenous Canaanites, we know they shared the same culture which would mean the same gods also. In Canaan, the chief god was El. El’s wife was Asherah, and his sons include Ba’al and Anut. The Canaanite pantheon is well-understood from the discovery of the Ugaritic texts which are dated to 1300-1100 BCE (Interestingly, the texts describe a “redemption of the first-born son” practice which was to later be practiced by the Israelites also, aka pidyon haben mitzvah today). The Ugaritic texts also show that the later Paleo-Hebrew alphabet script was indistinguishable from and really just is the Phoenician script alphabet.
Scholarly and archaeological evidences show that Yahweh was originally a god of metallurgy especially in northwest Saudi Arabia (aka Midian), and was introduced to Israel in a five-stage process:
1 -Traditional Polytheism. The earliest Israelites worshipped creator god El, his wife Asherah, and his sons e.g., Baal. 2 – Incorporation. Yahweh was incorporated as a 2nd tier god in El’s pantheon. 3 – Elevation. Yahweh and El are identified as the same deity. 4 – Monolatrism. A new yahweh-only movement emerges, and the gods of the second tier are denied. 5 – Monotheism. Gods of other nations are denied, yahweh’s power is deemed universal in scope.
Exodus 15:3 – Yahweh is a man of war. Yahweh is his name.
A common way the Old Testament writers referred to Yawheh is “YHWH OF “HOSTS”. However the word used for that title is actually “tsaba” which in original context meaning and in translated modern context reading of the text more correctly equates to “armies”.
Isaiah 47:4 – Our Redeemer, Yahweh of Armies is his name, the Holy One of Israel
The fact is that the later Hebrew god name of “Yahweh“, in turn is based on the Tetragrammaton which is a four-letter word transliterated as YHWH. And that Yahweh was also an older name already being used by other deserts pagan religions peoples and it actually was just one of a number of major gods being worshipped in ancient Canaanite religions and throughout the Levant/Middle East, such as the Edomites and Midianites others, but later circa. 9th century BCE the Hebrews decided eventually to start making YHWH their own personal storm god and main personal warrior deity, eventually over time becoming their personal “national god of Israel”. (see also jesusneverexisted.com/yahwehbrutalhungrygodlingofwar).
As mentioned, the oldest occurrence of this name is in the phrase “Shasu of yhw” in an Egyptian inscription from the time of Amenhotep III (1402–1363 BCE), the Shasu referring to the nomads from Midian and Edom in northern Arabia. The current consensus based on the known archaeological and paleographical textual evidences is therefore that Yahweh was a “divine warrior from the southern region from northern Arabia associated with Seir, Edom, Paran and Teman”, and probably introduced by the travellers along the caravan routes from northern Arabia (Edom, Midian and Moab) towards Egypt (Even the OT text unequivocally admits this: Habakkkuk 3:3 – “God came from Teman, and the Holy One from Mount Paran.”, Deuteronomy 33:2 – “Yahweh…rose from Seir unto them; He shined forth from mount Paran”), which would also largely explain why and when the Israelites decided to follow the Egyptian customs of circumcision, owning slaves and likewise enforcing pork prohibitions also (Although El would have still remained the most popular and supreme chief god of the Israelites and others in the lands of Canaan until the post-exilic period (537 to 430 BCE) as their new program was enforced on people by returned new priestly elites, see also Shasu of YWH and Yahwehism for some more interesting background tidbits).
Even in the OT mythology texts it is shown that “El” , aka “King of the Gods”, is the chief main deity among the ancient Israelites, but also among many other Canaanite and Levant region desert tribes and neighboring nations as well, and originating from ancient Mesopotamia. Yahweh also existed as a god among some tribes at the time and was known about but was a second tier god below El, aka known as the plural “Elohim”. Through later religious syncretism the Yahweh god became equated to El even taking on many of his personal attributes, his wife consort, characteristics and various powers. El was regarded as the highest deity of the ancient semitic pantheon and revered as the Father of all the Elohim together with his consort Asherah. Later still they renamed El as Yahweh and made him their national warrior god, and storm god at times also. So in the making of the desert cacodemon Yahweh, the probabilities and written textual and material remains evidences very strongly suggest and point to the original cult of YHWH being a god of metallurgy originating among some Midianite semi-nomadic desert copper smelters between the Bronze and Iron Age and was not even worshipped by Jews, not until centuries later through assimilation with El (who was originally Mesopotamian as shown), and then including some other adapted attributes and characteristics from other gods and their mythologies, aka religious syncretism, and then only after the post-exilic period (537 to 430 BCE) becoming pushed by the priestly elites and at times enforced by leaders to become the only national deity.
However, it was a long process that took place over centuries, numerous biblical scholars strongly believe that Asherah at one time was worshipped as the consort of Yahweh. There are references to the worship of numerous deities throughout the books of Kings: Solomon builds temples to many deities and Josiah is reported as cutting down the statues of Asherah in the temple Solomon built for Yahweh (2 Kings 23:14). Josiah’s grandfather Manasseh had erected one such statue (2 Kings 21:7), as just a few examples. Between the tenth century BCE and the beginning of their exile to Babylon in 586 BCE, polytheism was quite normal throughout Israel. Worship solely of Yahweh became established only after the Babylonian exile, and possibly only as late as the time of the Maccabees (2nd century BCE). That is when monotheism became universal among the Jews with the return of the priestly elites and scribes along with their new theological and textual reformulations and new adapted concepts and ideas from the Babylonian exile. Competing cults were banished and all sacrifice rituals were eventually centralized and unified in Jerusalem, i.e. – the process of a centuries-long deceptive trickery-theism and concoctions were then well on their way.
“Yahweh and his Asherah” is written in Phoenician script across the top of this eighth-century BCE drawing on a ceramic pithos, or storage jar, from Kuntillet ‘Ajrud in the eastern Sinai, including the phrases “Yahweh of Samaria and his Asherah” and “Yahweh of Teman and his Asherah. The four-tiered cult stand found at Tanaach is thought to represent Yahweh and Asherah, with each deity being depicted on alternating tiers. Image credit: Dr. Ze’ev Meshel and Avraham Hai/Tel Aviv University Institute of Archaeology.
Inscriptions were also found at the Kuntillet Ajrud site on plaster walls of the building, taken together, the inscriptions found at the site contain references to the names of several gods besides Yahweh and Asherah, including El and Baal, a transcription below…
…] second time /years[… ]in earthquake. In addition, when El shines forth in the [heights. Y]HW[H… ] R The mountains will melt, the hills will crush [… ] earth. The Holy One over the gods [… ] prepare (yourself) [to] bless Baʿal on a day of battle [… ] to the name of El on the day of bat[tle…
Numerous scholars and overwhelming textual and archaeological evidences clearly show that much of the Old Testament was written only after the first destruction of the Jerusalem temple and post-exilic period (537 to 430 BCE), i.e. – especially after the priestly elites and their scribes and followers returned from the Babylonian captivity. At that time is when new ideas were defined, written information omitted and redefined, many foreign new ideas, beliefs, customs and concepts that were already “in the air” for many centuries among neighboring tribes and peoples suddenly appeared in the OT literature that was not there before…adapting and mutating borrowings from the older Zoroastrianism religion, from Mesopotamian religions, Babylonian, Egyptian, Akkadian, Assyrian, Phoenician and other Levant and Canaanite pagan religions, which is just what the first original Israelites really were anyway and which the vast majority of biblical scholars, including even many Jewish scholars, agree, Originally just one tribe of the Canaanites yet sharing the same gods…and names of their gods, and yes even and particularly….Yahweh.
Ezekiel 20:26 – “I defiled them through their gifts—the sacrifice of every firstborn—that I might fill them with horror so they would know that I am the LORD.“
The documentary model developed originally in the 1870s, identifies that different authors – the Jahwist, Elohist, Deuteronomist, and the Priestly source – were responsible for editing the various OT stories from a polytheistic religion into those of a monotheistic religion…the desert cacodemon of Yahwehism-Jehovahism (all the couch church television viewers and pew audiences and fans are probably going to be shocked now when their speeching guru tells them the blasphemous abomination information at the next sermon or fake miracles heal-a-thon, it may even affect the various temples coffers).
Because only after the return from the Babylonian captivity is actually when the OT was written (the first 5 books were not written by any Moses character which is proven in the text itself and who is also absent from any and all contemporaneous and historical sources, including the hocus pocus magics)…It is at this time suddenly that the up to then known Wife of Yahweh…out…Dualism and eternally at war cosmic battling deities…in…Wandering demons/spirits, Egyptian eternal lake of fire punishments…in…future apocalyptic victory over the planet…in…astrotheology, talking serpents, gardens, dragons, world flood legend, future raised immortal zombifications and zapping-melting of enemy Non-Jewish gentile nations with fire…in…in…in…etc…etc…etc. The equivalent of Bronze/Iron Age fabulist charlatan televangelists actually just without the suits, microphones and 24 hour telephone hope and wish lines.
Numerous biblical scholars and critics, (already starting in the first century by various writers and commentators but especially in the last 100 years as a specifically studied and examined topic), after careful study of the written OT text have concluded that the morals of the Jewish Yahweh-Jehovah cacodemon deity character (who is also the Christian god and Jesus’ skydaddy supposedly and/or is Jesus or whatever, as well as being the Muslim, Baháʼí, Mormon and Jehovah’s Witnesses god) are quite simply appalling and that it can even be considered as a “Moral Monster”. They conclude that it is very obviously evident that the OT Yahweh morality and moral ideals are primitive and barbaric and are just another example of the ancient Middle East’s harsh, morally-problematic social milieu, not unlike other contemporaneous and older religions during the same general time period and areas (Bronze Age-Iron Age-Early Common Era). And that It is also evident in the text that the new emerging “Mosaic Law” are not in any way new illuminating laws or just ideals introduced by a skydaddy to do away with or replace already present inferior societal norms and practices already common in ancient Canaanite traditions, but that they are merely only attempts by the Deuteronomist elite (reflecting the economic needs and social status of the priestly caste and including importantly the local landowning aristocrats as many of the laws pertain specifically to property and possessions…i.e. – coveting another’s or the master’s oxen, donkeys, slaves, camels etc, how to manage foreign and native slaves and when to severely beat them or punish them by death etc), to regulate and legitimize already tolerated and accepted social and political structures and societal norms (warfare, ethnic cleansing, polygamy, patriarchalism, bloodthirsty massacres of men, women and children, child abuse, slavery, punishments by death, as well as promises of future cannibalism, eternal fire torment and the annihilation destruction of the overwhelmingly vast majority of humanoids populations that have ever lived etc), thereby permitting the various older primitive barbaric social structures to continue but simultaneously getting the official “Yahweh seal of approval”, and so in the process the “Moral Monster” falls far short of any sort of new morals or divine ideal, but is instead just wearing a new robe and sandals.
It is ceaselessly proven over and over again throughout the “script”-tures and supported by many other textual and archaeological evidences from the area and era, that the fictitious Yahweh-Jehovah godling deity is a concocted and mostly borrowed and adapted from other older surrounding religions pantheons and then just reworked and mutated over time to become only a local ethnocentric tribal deity of just one ancient deserts clan, and so it is in no way any sort of creator master of the universe or of the galaxy or the solar system or of the planet or of even one continent. It is instead shown to be a local simple-minded, primitive, jealous, confused, ignorant, easily duped and tricked and even made deals with and bribed (just one example is in Exodus 4:24 where Yahweh-Jehovah was going to kill Moses but his wife Zipporah then threw their son’s freshly cut foreskin at his feet which pleased god very much and so he changed his mind (wow probably a somersault diving in like a Wonder Woman or Jean Grey to throw the magical penis foreskin at Moses’ feet just in the nick of time, that’s the magics of the powers of the holy ghost!), so the godling was happily bribed by a fresh bloody penis foreskin basically, it’s good to know in case you ever need to change god’s mind…just throw it a fresh bloody penis foreskin…I should also note that many scamvangelists and modern apostle-witches claim that this scene is another prophecy fulfillment of the Jesus character, that it is an allegory, precursor and a clearly understood prophecy where the Jesus character is literally in fact the prophesied new fresh sacrificed penis foreskin that is “thrown to the Gentiles” and thus pleasing and changing Yahweh-Jehovah’s mind to make the Gentiles as the new chosen people instead, that sounds pretty common sense and a clearly understood fulfilled prophecy so sure whatever they say), curses-hurling, malevolent, blood-hungry, genocidal, regularly a failed predictor-promiser, self-admitted creator of evils, all gentiles-hating desert clan tribal godling-genie, which also explains why it is smiteful, genocidal, infanticidal, vengeful, pestilential, malevolent, bloodthirsty, ethnic cleanser, misogynistic, ultra extreme ethnocentric parochial, pyromaniacal, vaccicidal, filicidal, curse-hurling, cannibalistic, sadomasochistic, capriciously malevolent bully, slavemonger, control-freak terrorist, vindictive and merciless…when stuff happens.
And you have to admit it’s very, very strange, odd and yes even yet another example of a contradiction (among numerous contradictions evident in the biblical literature) that when the returned elitist priests and scribes continued their writings, that the “dualism” of a Yahweh with a wife/queen/consort Asherah was a big huge problem for them suddenly, but the newly devised “dualism” of 2 battling deities in the cosmos and heavens for control of the planet and universe was quite acceptable. I mean they give their Yahweh many times attributes of a male, as well as refer to him as “he”, “he” has this and that or did such and such, “he” smites, “he” is angry, “he” kills, massacres, destroys, floods, “he” creates the evil, “he” has sons even (eventually even Jesus supposedly which would mean he lived motherless in heaven for millions and billions and trillions and gazillions of years, just hanging around bearded old guys in heaven I guess floating around listening to trumpets and choirs all the time, all the angels are a “he” also apparently, I’m not sure about all those floating chubby cherubim winged babies in the paintings though who the heck knows). But doesn’t everyone and every animal on the planet need a mother to be born? I know I did I don’t know about you (Oh sure there are some animals and organisms on the planet that can reproduce themselves, mainly bacterias, hydras and some other anthoathecatas, various worms, fungi and water microorganisms, so god is like a bacteria, fungus or worm then?).
But those priests, elites and scribes coming back from Babylon with their newly adapted ideas and scrolls apparently thought that was ludicrous and blasphemous now or just not cool enough for their new emerging national god, and they also had to come up with a scapegoat excuse to blame for all the evil and things that they didn’t agree with that was going on, it appears “he” now had to be something more like what the Zoroastrians had all along (they had to give their Yahweh cacodemon deity an upgrade to compete and be more powerful to impress the masses, sort of like a revamp and refurbishment of a bus or jet plane as an analogy)…except now after adding some religious syncretism into the mix their newer and improved Yahweh national genie-god would instead zap and melt the Babylonians and Zoroastrian Persians, Akkadians, Assyrians, Egyptians and just about everyone else on earth (i.e. – zap and melt the Non-Jews, including the Greeks and Romans afterwards…hint – it never happened because the opposite happened instead), and then that instead the Israelites will be the future victorious ruling risen zombified priest kings of the planet favored by Yahweh (coincidentally, or not coincidentally actually, after this time is when the bickering Sadducees and Pharisees sects appear for the first time, with the following centuries of competition and conflict between them in deciding what the various official Jewish political, social, and religious roles and beliefs should be for the people and nation). However according to the known facts and even their own written biblical sources the opposite always kept happening time and time again (Maybe Yahweh needed yet another theological upgrade and magic powers refurbishment perhaps? or maybe the new temple should have rightfully been built more fancier with waterfalls and revolving door perhaps?, possibly, the best real god should have the best real temple after all, everyone knows that it’s common sense).
Even though the snake/serpent in the mythological fable is really just a wise snake and there’s absolutely no hint of the text implying anything otherwise (and the fable where later Satan and God are on the same team torturing Job, Satan says he was just “walking” around on the earth but snakes moving around on their stomaches simply can’t walk), but just to make some people happy for the sake of argument…
At my previous introductory post I already showed how the ancient Croatian Hyperboreans already existed for many 10’s of thousands of years on the European continent before the OT and Abrahamic religions world and universe even came into existence, they already lived during the Upper Paleolithic, Mesolithic and Bronze Age periods in Europe, they had functioning societies, manufacturing of tools and artistic objects, they charted the skies and cosmos to know the seasons and moon cycles and to know when the rivers rise and they had their deities pantheon during the LGM Ice Age and after the beginning of the Holocene period, and they even left behind many proofs and evidences…archaeological remains, cave paintings, pottery, mammoth bones carvings, bronze and iron artifacts and much more, and even they were intelligent enough to know that they had a mother and likewise females were also part of their deities pantheon, it only made sense. I’ll return to this topic a little more after the main included information from https://mythologymatters.wordpress.com
Yahweh’s Divorce from the Goddess Asherah in the Garden of Eden
Hebrew Bible scholars have long recognized that the writer who penned the story of Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden and much other narrative in the first 5 books of the Hebrew Bible (called the Pentateuch, or Torah) had a distinctly anti-Canaanite agenda, and that his anti-Canaanite polemic started in his Eden story. Focusing on this helps us to decipher the meaning of that story, as I have stressed in my new book, The Mythology of Eden, and in talks that I’ve given on the subject at scholarly conferences.
This author, known as the Yahwist (because he was the first author of the Hebrew Bible to use the name Yahweh for God), most clearly set out his anti-Canaanite views at the beginning of his version of the Ten Commandments, in Exodus 34:12-15, where the cacodemon Yahweh warns against and strictly forbids the Hebrews from associating with the Canaanites, intermarrying with them, and worshipping their deities; Yahweh also orders the Hebrews to tear down Canaanite altars, pillars, and asherahs (wooden poles (stylized trees) in sanctuaries that were the cult object of their goddess Asherah (in Hebrew pronounced ah-shei-RAH) and symbolized her). Against this background, the anti-Canaanite polemic in the Eden story becomes apparent, especially that against the goddess Asherah, who at the time was widely viewed by Israelites as Yahweh’s wife or consort. As official Israelite religion trended toward monotheism, the other local deities had to be eliminated (Asherah in particular), and Yahweh appropriated their powers and functions. Insofar as this process affected Asherah, I call this “Yahweh’s Divorce,” and the proceedings began in the Yahwist’s Eden story.
Before the rise of Israel, Asherah was the wife of El, the head god of the Canaanite pantheon. According to the archeological evidence, the people who became Israelites were mostly native Canaanites who settled in the hills of what is now the West Bank, while it seems that small but influential groups also migrated there from the south in the Midian (in and around the Araba Valley in Sinai). As the Bible itself testifies, that is where Yahweh veneration appears to have originated, and, in a process that in this respect resonates with the Moses story, the migrants introduced Yahweh to the native Canaanites who were becoming Israelites. Over time, El declined and merged into Yahweh. As part of that process, Yahweh inherited Asherah from El as his wife.
The Hebrew Bible refers to Asherah directly or indirectly some 40 times, always in negative terms (so she must have been a challenge). Most references are indirect, to the asherah poles that symbolized her, but a number of them clearly enough refer directly to the goddess Asherah (e.g., Judges 3:7; 1 Kings 15:13; 1 Kings 18:19; 2 Kings 21:7; 2 Kings 23:4-7; 2 Chron. 15:16). Evidently she was part of traditional official Israelite religion, for an asherah pole even stood in front of Solomon’s Temple for most of its existence, as well as in Yahweh’s sanctuary in Samaria. There is also much extra-biblical evidence of Asherah in Israel from the time of the judges right through monarchical times, including in paintings/drawings, pendants, plaques, pottery, (possibly) clay “pillar” figurines, cult stands, and in inscriptions. Several inscriptions specifically refer to “Yahweh and his Asherah [or asherah].” (It is not entirely certain whether the goddess herself or the asherah pole symbolizing her is being referenced here, but either way ultimately the goddess is meant, and she is being linked with Yahweh.)
The Yahwist and the other biblical writers could not accept the presence of this goddess as a deity in Israel, much less as the wife of Yahweh, who they specifically depicted in non-sexual terms. So they declared war on her, in part by mentioning her existence sparingly in the Bible, by referring to her and asherahs negatively when they did mention her, and by waging a polemic against her by allusions that would have been clear to the Yahwist’s audience. These tactics are apparent in the Eden story, from the kinds of symbols used and the trajectory of the narrative. These symbols include the garden sanctuary itself, the sacred trees, the serpent, and Eve, herself a goddess figure. In ancient Near Eastern myth and iconography, sacred trees, goddesses, and serpents often form a kind of “trinity,” because they have substantially overlapping and interchangeable symbolism and are often depicted together. Let’s examine each of these symbols briefly.
The Garden. Originally in the ancient Near East, the Goddess was associated with and had jurisdiction over vegetation and life, which she generated herself. People partook of the first crops (including fruit) as her bounty – indeed her body and her divinity – and set up her sanctuary with garden of crops for this purpose. Such a sacred garden sanctuary was “estate” over which she exercised jurisdiction. Examples include Siduri’s vineyard with a sacred tree in the Gilgamesh epic, Inanna’s garden precinct with sacred tree in Sumer, Calypso’s vineyard sanctuary in Homer’s Odyssey, and Hera’s Garden of the Hesperides. Garden sanctuaries of gods and kings evolved later, when religion became more patriarchal, sky gods came to dominate, and goddesses were substantially devalued. In the Eden story, Yahweh’s both creating the garden (i.e., life) and being in charge of it can be viewed as part of this process: There the Goddess (here Asherah) was eliminated from the garden sanctuary and from her functions there.
Sacred trees were thought to connect with the divine realms of both the netherworld and the heavens, and therefore were considered conduits for communicating with and experiencing the divine and themselves are charged with the divine force (thought of as “serpent power”; see below). In harmony with the seasons, trees embody the life energy and symbolize the generation, regeneration and renewal of life. Therefore, they are associated with the source of life, the Earth/Mother Goddess. Accordingly, sacred trees were venerated in Palestine in sacred sanctuaries known as “high places,” as means of accessing and experiencing divinity, principally the goddess Asherah. (Similarly, the divinity of the male deity was accessed through vertical stone pillars, e.g., the one set up by Jacob at Bethel.) In the Eden story, the two sacred trees of knowledge of good and evil and of life allude to this traditional role of sacred trees, but the meaning is turned upside down. In the story, Yahweh even creates the trees. In ordering Adam not to partake of the tree of knowledge of good and evil, by implication Yahweh was telling the audience not to venerate sacred trees in the traditional fashion. And in any event, the theretofore divine knowledge of good and evil that was acquired through eating the fruit is linked with Yahweh, not any goddess. And at the end of the story the tree of life is clearly designated as Yahweh’s, being guarded by his trademark symbols, the paired cherubim.
Serpents. In the ancient Near East, serpents had both positive and negative connotations, and in the Eden story the Yahwist played on each. In its positive aspect, the serpent represented the divine force itself, responsible for creation, life, and rebirth, as symbolized by its constant shedding of its skin. This and the fact that it lives within the earth (the netherworld) made for a natural association with the Mother Earth Goddess. As a result, the serpent was venerated as having divine powers and was used in rituals, including in marriage (to secure conception of children) and to maintain health. Serpents were also considered wise and sources of knowledge, and thus were used in divination. (The Hebrew noun for serpent (nāḥāš) connotes divination; the verb nāḥaš means to practice divination, and observe omens/signs.) Hence the serpent’s connection with transmission of the knowledge of good and evil in the Eden story. This “good” serpent was typically depicted in an upright or erect form, as in the case of the Egyptian erect cobra (in the illustration above), Moses’ bronze serpent on a pole, and the serpent on Asclepius’ staff (now the symbol of our medical profession).
But the serpent also was represented negatively as unrestrained divine power, which produces chaos, which is evil. Therefore, in creation myths the serpent/dragon represents the primordial chaos that must be overcome in order to establish the created cosmos (known as the “dragon fight” motif). This primordial chaos serpent is most often a serpent/dragon goddess (e.g., Tiamat in the Babylonian Enuma Elish) or her proxy (Typhon was the creation of Gaia). The serpent in this “evil” aspect is most often depicted horizontally. In the Eden story our author used this negative aspect, while parodying the traditional positive associations, which Yahweh appropriated. Thus, in the story, the serpent connoted chaos and symbolized the chaos in Eve’s heart as she deliberated. At the end of the story, Yahweh cursed the serpent and flattened its posture (compared with the upright/erect posture it had when talking with Eve). As a result, Yahweh was victorious over the serpent and chaos and, by implication the Goddess, in a mini version of the above-mentioned dragon fight motif. Bible scholars overwhelmingly agree that the serpent in the Eden story was not the Satan or the Devil character (nor was ever implied to be so rather just an animal), whose figure appeared much later in Judaism and Christianity and Islam. The chaos that this serpent represented existed even before the creation and before Yahweh created the serpent (which creation also conveys Yahweh’s superiority over it, being the arch-cacodemon). The audience of the Eden story knew that some degree of chaos (evil) is naturally present in the fabric of the cosmos (and so too in humans), so no additional outside agency was needed to bring evil into being. Thus, the serpent was only a symbol of already existing evil, not its source.
The Goddess. As noted by numerous biblical scholars, the Goddess is also seen in the figure of Eve herself, the last figure in our trinity of tree-serpent-Goddess. In the Eden story she is given the epithet “the mother of all living,” an epithet like those given to various ancient near Eastern goddesses including Siduri, Ninti, and Mami in Mesopotamia and Asherah in Syria-Palestine. Eve’s actual name in Hebrew (ḥawwâ), besides meaning life (for which goddesses were traditionally responsible), is also likely wordplay on an old Canaanite word for serpent (ḥeva). The name of the goddess Tannit (the Phoenician version of Asherah) means “serpent lady,” and she had the epithet “Lady Ḥawat” (meaning “Lady of Life”), which is derived from the same Canaanite word as Eve’s name (ḥawwâ). At the end of the story, Eve is punished by having to give birth in pain, whereas goddesses in the ancient Near East gave birth painlessly. Further, in Genesis 4:1, Eve needs Yahweh’s help in order to become fertile and conceive, a reversal of the Goddess’ power and function. (Indeed, Eve is even created from Adam!, and very strangely and absurdly only after all the animals were deemed not a suitable partner for him) Adam’s only fault was “listening” to Eve in order to attain divine qualities. Here the Yahwist may be alluding to Goddess veneration, saying not to worship her. This seems to be one reason for the punishment consisting of woman’s subjugation to man in Genesis 3:16.
As a result of these events, by the end of the story Yahweh is supreme and in control of all divine powers and functions formerly in the hands of the Goddess, and Canaanite religion in general has been discredited. Yahweh is in charge of the garden (formerly the Goddess’ province), from which chaos has been removed. Sacred tree veneration has been prohibited and discredited, while Yahweh appropriates and identifies himself with the Tree of Life (see also Hosea 14:8, where Yahweh claims, “I am like an evergreen cypress, from me comes your fruit.”). The serpent has been vanquished, flattened, and deprived of divine qualities, and thus is not worthy of veneration, and enmity has been established between snakes and humans. The Goddess has been discredited, rendered powerless, and is eliminated from the picture and sent into oblivion. Yahweh’s divorce from her has been made final, at least in the author’s mind. But in fact she persisted, and her equivalents in the psyche inevitably have persisted to this day, as they must.
Sources and Bibliography
Becking, Bob, Dijkstra, Meindert, et al. Only One God? Monotheism in Ancient Israel and the Veneration of the Goddess Asherah. London: Sheffield Academic Press (2001).
Billing, Nils. Nut: The Goddess of Life in Text and Iconography. Uppsala: Akademitryck (2002).
Dever, William. Did God Have a Wife? Archaeology and Folk Religion in Ancient Israel. Grand Rapids, Michigan: Eerdmans (2005).
George, Arthur, and Elena George. The Mythology of Eden. Lanham, Maryland: Hamilton Books (2014).
Hadley, Judith. The Cult of Asherah in Ancient Israel and Judah: Evidence for a Hebrew Goddess. Cambridge, UK: Cambridge University Press (2000).
Keel, Othmar, and Christoph Uehlinger. God, Goddesses, and Images of God in Ancient Israel. Minneapolis: Fortress Press (1998).
Kikawada, Isacc. “Two Notes on Eve,” Journal of Biblical Literature, 91:33-37 (1972).
Olyan, Saul. Asherah and the Cult of Yahweh in Israel. Atlanta: Scholars Press (1988).
Patai, Raphael. The Hebrew Goddess. 3rd ed. Detroit: Wayne State University Press (1990).
Wallace, Howard. The Eden Narrative. Atlanta: Scholars Press (1985).
Godzilla, a Leviathan sea monster illustration from Old Testament text and an ancient Mesopotamian religious stone carving from circa. 2450 BCE, what’s up with that and the book of Revelation connection? And what does it have to do with the later Bronze-Iron Age desert Yahweh cacodemon godling? Do telescamvangelists even know?
Just one more very eye-opening fact is that just like the previous points discussed about the origins of and the influencing factors of and the borrowed fables themselves into the Old Testament and Bible from other older pagan religions, including their abstract concepts, characters, astrotheology, deities pantheons, concepts of hell, resurrections, resurrecting saviour messiahs, spirits/demons, a Devil, “Dualism” concepts of a devil and other god being in eternal conflict etc, is just how oblivious and clueless most people are about these real factors and facts involved, these are all things imported into the Old Testament written sources by scribes that were originally ideas from other Mesopotamian, Sumerian, Zoroastrian, Egyptian and other Canaanite religions and their beliefs, and later still esoteric secret mysticism religions, gnosticism, Greco-Roman religions and Hellenistic Judaism philosophies and ideas etc. It’s really laughable and just plain pathetic when some fraudster prophet-wannabe thinks he/she knows prophetic meanings and then start their shtick on pulpits or behind desks and microphones and especially in their slick fakery DVDs and books (hardcover and paperback of course). And gullible believing people fall for it, even circling passages and underlining verses or sentences and all that like they know what they’re doing, thinking they’re onto something, onto the truth and revealed mysteries and godly supertruths. But it’s even more pathetic that all these things which they think are some inspired holy prophetic and new glorious god or heavenly wisdom secrets and holy news scoop hunches…..are in reality just much older pagan religions ideas, fables and wisdom secrets. (see also jesusneverexisted.com/yahwehbrutalhungrygodlingofwar).
The Hebrew concept of “the universe” during the Old Testament Biblical superheroes times is actually the forerunner to those Flat Earth Theory people who are still around today, according to the Yahwehism-Jehovahism beliefs Earth was within a dome and the blue sky was even believed to be a wall of water floating in the atmosphere with literal pillars supporting the flat earth which had ends, rain was believed to be God tipping his rain jars and snow was kept in the snow storage houses, that earthquakes are caused by god’s anger, that there were no rainbows before the Noah superhero, that the Moon has a light of its own, that stars fall from the skies etc…etc…etc. Also according to their understanding and knowledge of the known world which consisted of mainly just the Levant, then in the corresponding map seen above Europe, Asia, Australia, North America and South America would be located in outer space somewhere and not on the flat earth disc, it’s pretty easy and plain to see that the newly concocted Yahweh-Jehovah tribal deity was just their “God of the Middle East” and without a doubt was never a God of the Danube, Alps, Carpathians, or Mississippi, Ural, Ganges rivers etc. However, even this wrong world view as well as many other biblical views, beliefs, events and legends characters actually directly derive from the ancient Mesopotamian religion, and even elements from ancient Egypt. i.e. – from the religious beliefs and practices of the civilizations of ancient Mesopotamia from since 3500 BCE, so it’s clear and strange, but not surprising, to see that the Hebrew Jehovah-Yahweh desert cacodemon deity gave secret news scoop tips to his writers to basically copy ancient pagan cosmological world views and religious beliefs and stories, adapt and personalize them and then pass them off as his own. Lots and lots of ideas, characters, legends, beliefs and views were borrowed from them also.
View of the “Holy Land/God’s Country” seen within the expanse of the “biblical universe”, the biblical universe where all the desert blood magic, suspension of disbelief and hocus pocus took place and very strangely the absolute only place on the entire planet where god liked to vacation, smite, kill and make failed predictions when not on his throne, the universe is highlighted in red (the people and nations living on the rest of the planet are basically just irrelevant NPC characters, or most likely just demons probably). If you read the bible without believing it, if you read it and realize it’s just another people’s national myths and folklore, just primitivism and a bunch of stories and mythologies written by obsessively superstitious people from the Bronze/Iron Age deserts – then it becomes increasingly apparent that they attributed the most circumstantial events and psychological traits to their god (aka “God of the Middle East”). After reading it you can then ask yourself does this sound familiar? Is this the same “real world” you live in or a world you could easily step into and just continue living and thinking and acting as usual alongside one of “their world” characters and their world thinking views, mega-ethnocentric superstitions and behaviorisms, or vice versa? (I guarantee if you did teleport there you would be stoned to death in no time just as god commanded), Or does it sound much more like fables and fiction characters? The bible and Abrahamic religions screams out loud of an ancient desert peoples who knew nothing of psychology, natural science, earth science, physics, astronomy, geography, coincidence, human fallibility and even cases of basic biology and hygiene, it’s a book that actually even celebrates ignorance in those fields, where anyone hearing voices was experiencing god talking and angels or demons under every rock and behind every bush. The writings and character’s quotes come across more as absurd kitsch comedic drama with a penchant for the distasteful and even warped demented side. Click open the image of earth for full view of the universe highlighted in red.
Like I said, now the reader might be wondering just what the heck Godzilla, a sea monster illustration from OT text sources and an ancient Mesopotamian religious stone carving from circa. 2450 BCE really does have to do with the Yahweh-Jehovah deity character, with the Old Testament and the Hebrew bible?, as well as the book of Revelation science-fiction novel, well I’m glad you asked because it’s much more all related than you probably think. Because it’s actually just yet another of many evidences that the newly appearing Yahweh-Jehovah cacodemon deity character and Yahwehism-Jehovahism of the Hebrew bible is not something new or a newly appearing personal skydaddy supremo with all the perfect answers, laws, rules and the best most powerful smartest magical powers etc etc etc, but is instead just a borrowing of concepts and ideas from other older surrounding religions and their beliefs and legends (the whole Adam & Eve, Noah’s ark, creation narrative, wandering demons (originally Daemons/Daimons), the powerful Devil character and Dualism concepts, resurrections, circumcisions, dietary and slavery laws and eating pork prohibitions etc, already mentioned earlier). Because in this particular case in Psalm 74:14 right in the middle of God’s ordering of the sea and dry land, his establishing of the sun, moon, stars, and the seasons etc, we find another event…God destroying sea monsters!
The text excerpt reads…”…You divided the sea by your might; you broke the heads of the sea monsters on the waters. You crushed the heads of Leviathan; you gave him as meat for the people inhabiting the wilderness…”. Yep how about that?, so it seems when the Yahweh-Jehovah desert cacodemon deity was creating the earth he was apparently also battling multi-headed and giant sea monsters living in the oceans and then feeding the ancient Hebrews with its destroyed carcass, and that’s straight from biblical text so you can’t disbelieve or deny it. And in Isaiah 27:1 we have another future “prophecy”….”…In that day, the LORD will punish with his sword, his fierce, great and powerful sword, Leviathan the gliding serpent, Leviathan the coiling serpent; he will slay the monster of the sea”. Leviathan is also mentioned in the book of Job. However we know today that this imagery, legends, magical characters and related concepts are yet again just borrowings from the older Mesopotamian and surrounding Canaanite religions traditions and beliefs. Hadad was the storm and rain god in the Canaanite and ancient Mesopotamian religions (seen pictured above on stone where Hadad battles the great sea dragon creature Lotan-Litan-Leviathan, notice also the obvious parallels and symbologies continuum with the much later book of Revelations symbologies), the Baal Cycle, also known as the Epic of Baal, is a collection of stories about the god Baal from the Canaanite area who is also referred to as Hadad, the storm-god. This collection of stories is dated between 1400 and 1200 BCE and was found in Ugarit, an ancient city located in modern-day Syria, the tradition of Hadad the storm god is believed to originate from ancient Mesopotamia (Iraq), Canaan (Palestine), Ugarit (Syria) from already in 2500 BCE then extending elsewhere. In the literature of ancient Ugarit, the god Hadad-Baal battles Yamm, who is portrayed as a chaotic, churning sea and a terrifying sea dragon named Tannun or Litanu (Lotan), which are terms equivalent to the Hebrew words used in Psalm 74 Tanninim and Leviathan, other parallels are found elsewhere in the Old Testament (Isaiah 27:1; Job 26:13) which are directly adapted from the older Ugaritic stories. Ugaritian Litanu, Lotan and Yamm and the later biblical Leviathan are in fact one and the same, that’s not too surprising since Ugarit’s culture had a lot in common with the Canaanite one from which the Hebrews later emerged. According to scholars the composition of the psalms spans clearly from the post-Exilic period (not earlier than the fifth century BCE), although according to Jewish tradition the Book of Psalms was composed even by the very First Man…Adam, which besides laughable is also bizarrely absurd and already easily proven incorrect and refuted by reality.
(The myth of Hadad defeating Lotan, Yahweh defeating Leviathan, Marduk defeating Tiamat etc, in the mythologies of the Ancient Near East are classical examples of the generic cosmogony “struggle against chaos” mytheme, also reflected in Zeus’ slaying of Typhon in Greek mythology and Thor’s struggle against Jörmungandr in the Gylfaginning portion of the Prose Edda, among other examples. Many scholars claim that Isaiah 27:1 is a direct quote lifted from the Ugaritic text, correctly rendering Ugaritic bṯn “snake” as Hebrew nḥš “snake).
The Yahweh-Jehovah snake-related punishment is recorded in Numbers 21:6-9, which apparently demonstrates that only he/it has ultimate power over serpents (and in the process over all evil and can send evil as he/it pleases). Very strangely however, not only did he send venomous snakes to punish the Israelites because of their ingratitude, but he also provided the means of a cure (i.e. – the bronze snake on a rod). It is noteworthy during this episode that the Israelites were required to gaze up at the bronze serpent to be cured, which is an obvious indication of the already existing traditions of pagan “Imitative Magic“, which is a magic based on the assumption that a desired result, person or thing can be supernaturally affected through mimicking it or through an object representing it (with other more fantastical examples to follow). Interestingly, this magic episode also shows a very evident parallel to the Ugaritic liturgy against venomous snakes as found in the Ugaritic Texts. Three texts from Ugarit, all of which address this problem of venomous snakes, suggest that the typical pagan solution was to search for a magic formula to counter the results of the venom by symbological imitative magic and/or incantations.
The main point though is that even just this example again clearly shows and proves that the OT Hebrew bible Yahweh-Jehovah cacodemon deity (aka El, Hadad, Lord, God, Allah, Mo, The Big Kahuna, the One and Only Who Creates the Evil, Tips the Rain Jars etc) character and ideas is overwhelmingly religious syncretism, just a borrowed mixed bag assemblage of surrounding much older Semitic people’s pagan religions and their concepts, stories traditions, magical characters and ideas, a hodgepodge jumble patchwork deity relying on the exploits of other surrounding older deities basically and just imitating their magical deeds and powers. The relationship between the OT and the new Yahwehism-Jehovahism is that they are largely assimilated from the various older gods and goddesses of Canaan, including the leading gods El, Yahweh and Baal, the great goddesses (Asherah, Astarte and Anat), astral deities (Sun, Moon and Lucifer-Venus), and underworld deities (Mot, Resheph, Molech and the Rephaim etc) so including stories about battling Leviathian sea monsters are really not that surprising and it’s not surprising that similarly described sea creatures, serpent dragons and sea battles plots are in the Revelation book also. These are all much older pagan ideas and creatures/characters and plots floating around the Middle East since the time of the Mesopotamian religions and only much later was absorbed by the new on the scene Jews, and later Christian cults and sects. But why would they do this in the first place anyway? the answer is very simple and extremely self-evident…
…because the biblical Yahweh-Jehovah desert cacodemon god does not exist and Old Testament passed down recorded textual material is overwhelmingly mostly just fiction, adaptions and borrowings, which makes the Yahweh-Jehovah god a complete fraud and a many centuries-long deceptive trickery-theism concoction, it’s actually just a locally invented godling (And you know what that means, it means all the John Hagees, Jack Van Impes and whole plethora of other similar prophet-wannabe preachers and telescamvangelists predictor fraudsters are probably disappointed now that for their entire lives they’ve actually been preaching and writing books and making DVDs and sermoning about 4500+ year old pagan Mesopotamian-Canaanite-Egyptian and other Semitic people’s pagan magical characters, ideas, concepts, stories and fables (as well as heavily influenced by Zoroastrian, Greco-Roman mythologies and concepts etc), so they’re all going to hell now without a doubt for deceiving people and the whole burning/pitchfork/burning worms thing of course, and even their favorite wowing theme of the eternal burning punishments and a “Lake of Fire” are from pagan Egyptian religious beliefs, so the nefarious scamvangelists are blatantly spreading Egyptian religions concepts that aren’t originally in the bible and they don’t even know it or even seem to care, lol, i.e. – which would mean that today in the year 2021 CE televangelists are then intentionally trying to brainwash and mold the minds of their audiences/fans into believing that Bronze Age pagan Mesopotamian, Canaanite and Egyptian religious beliefs, desert blood magic witchcraft and astrotheology concepts are from their Yahweh-Jehovah god, but importantly for faith seed shekels for some sort of harvest somewhere).
And why even plant the personally invented tree in the garden in the first place if he/it knew what would happen anyway and just get him constantly angry and genocidal?, and why curse all snakes born afterwards just because of one measly snake who wasn’t even specifically told or warned to not talk to any humans?, shouldn’t he/it have first warned the snake to keep his opinions to himself and not go around philosophizing and discussing semantics with non-snakes being all fancy-pants cerebral and questioning things? And why even make a snake that can reason and talk in the first place? He should have made it so that ducks talk instead, because c’mon seriously who’s gonna believe or listen to a talking duck, just look at them they’re ridiculous looking nobody would even listen to a talking duck. That would have saved a lot of trouble and needless smitings, genocides, lamenting and sacrifices. Also, if the bible is “real” events, “real” people and “real” history and “reality”, then why the heck are they in the “religions” section at the library? (which is usually right beside or even many times blasphemously sharing shelves with the abominations “mythology” and “fantasy” section, practically all one section or just put between them), shouldn’t they rightfully be way over in the historical reality and real world “non-fiction” section instead? (you know, along with Julius Caesar, Hannibal, Charlemagne, Herodotus, Ghenghis Khan, Hammurabi, Darius, Theodoric, Plato, Stone Age artifacts, dinosaur fossils etc), because if it’s all real and real history then that doesn’t even make any sense.
Philosoraptor has some good points. Either the Cosmos and planet flat Earth on pillars are around 6,000 years old according to biblical OT history-time chronology…meaning dinosaurs didn’t exist, or they did exist and the Earth really is round and billions of years older which would mean that the biblical anonymous writers are just lying and making things up for personal nefarious agendas, only one of them can be right.
It’s just one of many Old Testament parallels and borrowings from older pagan religions in the Middle East and not anything given by any later made up Yahweh-Jehovah desert cacodemon deity, most well known is probably the Epic of Gilgamesh from circa. 2100 BCE being the primary source fo the later biblical Garden of Eden, Noah’s flood and other stories. (Later various invented gematria numerology modus operandi was concocted to bring new magical meanings and predictions to former meanings and failed prophecies, but it’s mainly just feeble attempts to hide the truth and actual written texts). Although now when watching Godzilla movies you can have a whole new perspective and exciting popcorn eating viewing experience about them olden days real Leviathan battles, and the one still to come also…hehehe.
Of course, no examination about these topics of religious syncretism and cultural diffusion is even partially complete without mentioning the Epic of Gilgamesh from ancient Mesopotamia. The ancient Sumerian poem was written in cuneiform on clay tablets and they are dated to 2100 BCE (although the poem itself is regarded as several centuries older). And very interestingly they also contain various themes, plot elements, and characters found only much later in the Hebrew Bible, especially stories that correlate most notably with the accounts of the Garden of Eden, the advice from Ecclesiastes, and the Genesis flood narrative of the OT, scholars believe these and other parallels also clearly show that the Epic of Gilgamesh, which was eventually found widespread in the Levant region for many centuries, is without a doubt the origins of the much later biblical Genesis novel mythology and narrative stories. So it is also no mere coincidence that the ridiculous concocted Abram/Abraham character fable found in the OT (who supposedly lived at the same time for 58 years while Noah was still alive (because Noah lived to be 950 years old including 600 years after the flood), and who’s wife Sarah was coveted as a bride for her sexy beauty by a pharaoh and a Canaanite king…when she was 75 and over 90 years old) includes the patriarchal character who according to the story was an earlier rich wandering traveling many camels and slaves owning Babylonian magus sorcerer guru from Ur of the Chaldeans in the same Mesopotamia (i.e. Iraq, and btw also becoming a mythological founder of 100s and 1000s of mutating and contradictory cults and sects of 3 major religions). Obvious parallels and examples of the religious mythology syncretism and various cultural diffusion that took place in the Levant region over time.
You see “Thou shalt not kill” only applies to your own people or village or slave owners, when it’s other foreign people, cattle, babies or religions then there’s a loophole and it’s actually open season, because you always have to have loopholes of course everyone knows that (either that or it’s just yet another contradiction about something).
Loopholes are definitely the way to go. It’s also not strange or very surprising that according to Dan Barker who is a former Bible-Belt Pastor, and many, many, many scholars over the years and others, the OT god is correctly described as the most unpleasant character in all fiction; jealous and proud of it; a petty, unjust, unforgiving, control-freak; a vindictive, bloodthirsty ethnic cleanser; a misogynistic, ultra extreme ethnocentric parochial, infanticidal, genocidal, filicidal, pestilential, megalomaniacal, sadomasochistic, capriciously malevolent bully, pyromaniacal, angry, merciless, curse-hurling, vaccicidal, aborticidal, cannibalistic, slavemonger, homicidal, evil, and a terrorist, and it even admits it himself that he creates evil and more, see his website https://unpleasant.ffrf.org/ for easy to read proof with the bible verses people don’t like to admit exists which shows that the OT god is really no god at all but is more an absurd primitive tribal moral monster. (Basically, all that modern day rigmarol about all-knowing, all-wise, all-loving etc, especially by telescamvangelists today, is just personal invented faith shekels seeds jimble jamble).
Without a doubt, Jesus’ all-powerful super-duper smart deranged skydaddy the desert cacodemon Yahweh-Jehovah was the Lord of Loopholes that’s for sure (After all, what’s a god without a loophole I tell you).
It’s very interesting for those unaware to also know that the word “Demon” actually comes from the word “Daemon” which is the Latin word for the Ancient Greek word “Daimon” (meaning: god, godlike, power, fate etc), which originally referred to a lesser deity. Daimons were also possibly seen as the souls of men of the golden age acting as tutelary deities, a religious, philosophical, literary and psychological concept also meaning “provider of destinies”, benevolent or benign nature spirits, similar to ghosts, chthonic heroes, spirit guides, forces of nature etc, having absolutely no negative connotations. However later Abrahamic religions have borrowed and twisted the word’s original etymology and meaning by applying it to various Ancient Mesopotamian and ancient Semitic Canaanite and Egyptian deities, guardian and wandering spirits (the “wanderers” are associated with possession, mental illness, death and plagues), underworld spirits/deities that could terrorize mortals on earth and even drag them back down with them. Later the Tanakh-Hebrew bible mentions two classes of “demonic” spirits, the se’irim and the shedim. The word shedim appearing in two places in the Tanakh (Psalms, Deuteronomy), the se’irim are mentioned once in Leviticus and probably a re-calling of Assyrian demons in the shape of goats. The shedim in return are not pagan demigods, but the very foreign gods themselves. From Chaldea, the term shedu traveled to the Israelites and they eventually applied the word to all surrounding Canaanite deities. There are indications that demons in popular Hebrew mythology were believed to come from the nether world who brought various diseases and ailments and particularly those affecting the brain and those of an internal nature. Examples include catalepsy, headache, epilepsy and nightmares etc. There also existed a demon of blindness, “Shabriri” (“dazzling glare”) who rested on uncovered water at night and blinded those who drank from it…
…The later word “Demon” was used as an umbrella term for all these previous Middle Eastern-Canaanite/Egyptian/Mesopotamian religion’s deities and spirits and then applied on various ailments and diseases supposedly brought by them onto humans. In this primitive hocus pocus worldview of theirs the germs, bacterias, chromosome abnormalities, viruses, DNA mutations etc that actually caused blindness, abnormal births, deformities etc actually had nothing to do with it because they thought it was all just floating around demons.
“Daimons” (left, aka Daemons) of Classical Antiquity transformed into later Abrahamic religions floating and wandering so-called “Demons” (pictured right). Daimons were pagan entities (similar to other Croatian Hyperborean folkloric nature spirits and deities/fairies/paranormal entities etc from the Pre-Common Era) and were also possibly seen as the souls of men of the golden age acting as tutelary deities, a religious, philosophical, literary and psychological concept also meaning “provider of destinies”, benevolent or benign nature spirits, similar to ghosts, chthonic heroes, spirit guides, forces of nature etc, having absolutely no negative connotations. But later they were transformed into the grotesque ghoulish spirits and strange otherwordly mutants who inhabited the lands of the Middle East for thousands of years and renamed them “demons” who now instead caused various problems around the world, all that new underworld burning worms pitchforking stuff and eventually starring in numerous movies, pepper hot sauces, canned hams and foods connotations (sort of like transforming Mickey Mouse into Oogie Boogie). So basically people who during their whole lives, and their ancestors before them for probably thousands of years, who would beseech various nature deities and benevolent spirits and guides for protection while traveling in the forests or for successful hunts and fishing spots or better health or directions at night etc, were all of a sudden now told that they shouldn’t contact or ask them for anything because they’re actually Middle Eastern demons looking to cause them harm, eat them and torture them eternally in the burning underground Egyptian fire lava pits, which sure is different and made-up rubbish.
As explained in my previous post, the concepts of an afterlife netherworld of torturous punishments, underworld fiery spirits (today erroneously called “demons” as already explained there), the concepts of final Judgment of the Dead, burning punishments and a final destroying “Lake of Fire” are also imported ideas originally from ancient Egyptian religious beliefs and their Books of the Netherworld, Book of the Dead as well as the Coffin Texts dated from already 2100 BCE. i.e. – the recorded concept of hell in ancient Egypt predates the recorded concept of hell in the modern religions of Judaism, Christianity and Islam by many centuries and so it was invented by them and then only later adapted by other religions. Those who were judged unfavorably were bound having their limbs tied and then tortured in every imaginable way and then finally “destroyed” in an eternal “Lake of Fire”, a Pool of Fire filled with fiery burning lava liquid. They are painted on the walls of tombs and in ancient papyrus showing burning bodies of the damned floating in the Lake of Fire, fed by flames from braziers along the lake’s edges. So many televangelists, preachers and cults and sects gurus are actually spreading ancient Egyptian afterlife burning fire and religious ideas thinking it’s originally biblical or some secret given hocus pocus knowledge by their god. This invented doctrinal theology was a popular pretend world dreamscape modus operandi used on the feeble-minded and unknowing ignorant masses for many centuries to scare them into unquestioning submission, but it’s still used by many scamvangelists and apostle-witches fraudsters even still today, for shekels faith seeds, even claiming that every person, every baby, is from the start born cursed with the magical fruit original sin and so destined for their concocted burning eternal hell…unless they get so-called “saved” by bowing to the fictitious absurd primitive Iron Age Yahweh-Jehovah mythological desert phantasm-genie and then join their yom kippur sheepism-goatism blood magic mind control cult, to become a future zombie with a new immortal spacesuit body and then live in Jerusalem forever going to the temple forever, or joins one of the cults and sects anyway…the right one obviously (to claim that some are cursed to hellish eternal doom from the being born start is one thing and perhaps reasonable or even plausible, but every single humanoid born on the planet?, but with less than zero evidence and only pretend world esoteric crypto-mystical imaginary contradictory personal delusions by a few pathologically obsessed anonymous writing blood magic kabbalist gurus in a desert somewhere to support that claim? That’s nothing but pure nefarious invented apostolic-witchery charlatanism without a doubt).
And besides all that cool lakes of fire torture burnings punishments hijinx ideas imported later by the Jewish elite priests and scribes, is of course the neato custom of slavery which the floating skydaddy had no major problems with and actually approved. Above an image from a stone carving of ancient Egyptians with some newly captured African slaves of their most hated mortal enemy the Nubians, which the new later Yahweh-Jehovah tribal god apparently thought was such a great idea that he even gave rules about slave owning for his chosen peeps also. According to the story, giving rules on how to manage and be ruthless to foreign slaves because they were the owner’s personal property…forever, and slightly better rules for native slaves, when to punish them by death, or to just beat them to within an inch of their life or losing an eyeball (because they were the owner’s rightful property according to god’s law just like his oxen, camels and sheep etc). So strangely, instead of abolishing the slavery custom along with eating pork spare ribs and shellfish, it’s apparent the later appearing new Yahweh-Jehovah desert storm god had no real issues with Egyptian slavery more or less and so later just adapted and popularized the custom so that his peeps could have lots of them also. It’s very apparent from even just the few examples shown here, after returning from the Babylonian captivity the newly devised and mutating personal Yahweh-Jehovah desert tribal god owes his whole existence and religion practically to the beliefs, theologies and customs of the older surrounding Zoroastrian, Mesopotamian, Babylonian, Egyptian, Akkadian, Assyrian, Phoenician and other Levant and Canaanite pagan religions. (even the customs of circumcision and being forbidden to eat pork has much earlier tradition origins from them also, particularly because the Egyptian god Set murdered his brother Osiris and would transform into a black pig as well as being an enemy of Horus, thus the taboo of eating swine still being a religious prohibition among Jews and Muslims even still today because those religions sprang and grew in the same geographically and culturally coterminous Levant area which included ancient Canaan). Image: touregypt.net.
Just one of numerous examples in biblical/OT text, where the original written “scripture” was referred to again later but after the Babylonian captivity and return to ancient Canaan and Jerusalem where now the newly adopted Zoroastrian concept and mutated character of Satan was introduced, more specifically where the personal trait and actions of the desert cacodemon Yahweh (aka God these days to the uninformed) is now instead transferred to a newly invented powerful entity who erroneously gets the blame instead. You’ve got to obey Satan-God and that’s a fact, and for someone who says he’s all-knowing, all-powerful and all-wise and that he never changes his mind or repent…well he sure does change his mind a lot and repent (more problematic “god-spoken contradictions”).
“El” the first original and oldest OT biblical god, before mutating into the Zoroastrian inspired Yahweh-Jehovah god (aka Jesus’ dad, the big guy, Moses’, Noah’s, Abe’s and Ezekiel’s homie-boss, the Big Kahuna of the garden and planet, the one and only who tips the rain jars etc), as well as the guy most people refer to when hoping to win the lottery or ball game, when the tv remote wasn’t broken but just needed new batteries, when the drive-thru is still open past midnight or when people sneeze etc (e.g. -…”Whew thank god, the Jerry Springer show was about to begin but the remote wasn’t broken it just needed new batteries!”…”Whew thank god the drive-thru is still open I’m starving!” etc). Btw as a reminder, there is no “J” sound in Hebrew and so the name actually is more properly understood as Joshua, Yēšūaʿ = Jesus in Hebrew, which is just a common alternative form of the name Yəhōšūaʿ = Joshua, sort of like Mary-Marie etc, televangelists won’t tell you any of these facts presented here because it complicates the books and DVD sales but especially the temple faith shekels donations especially in Texas.
The Yahweh-Jehovah desert cacodemon deity reminiscing about the good ol’ early days of child sacrificings with his people. Well, he did say that “he creates the evil,” so it’s really not that surprising (this of course was before satan because he didn’t exist yet until invented as a scapegoat centuries later after the Babylonian exile). Luckily there are numerous similar text excerpts which were not 100% omitted after editing, censuring and redacting by later scribes which are vestiges of the earliest times, traditions and beliefs of the religion, and which give a much more clearer and informative understanding of the linear history to scholars today.
Yahweh-Jehovah apparently promised to throw a really great down-home BBQ shindig (but no pork spare ribs or shellfish of course).
Well, the way I see it, it did make the talking snake, and it did make and plant the tree, and it does know the future of everything everywhere before it even happens supposedly, so then that would mean…well…it probably means something to somebody somewhere for some reason or another, anyway…
As just one example, above is the opinion of Ze’ev Herzog, an Israeli archaeologist, professor of archaeology at The Department of Archaeology and Ancient Near Eastern Cultures at Tel Aviv University specializing in social archaeology, ancient architecture and field archaeology. He just might…just might know a little more than John Hagee, Kenneth Copeland, Joyce Meyer, Pat Robertson, Billy Graham and, well, more than lots of people writing and spreading fabulist fiction stories and abstract concepts histories behind microphones, on stages and on television and Youtube sermons. Here’s an excerpt of what else he thinks based on his “years of research”…..”This is what archaeologists have learned from their excavations in the Land of Israel: the Israelites were never in Egypt, did not wander in the desert, did not conquer the land in a military campaign and did not pass it on to the 12 tribes of Israel. Perhaps even harder to swallow is the fact that the united monarchy of David and Solomon, which is described by the Bible as a regional power, was at most a small tribal kingdom. And it will come as an unpleasant shock to many that the God of Israel, Jehovah, had a female consort and that the early Israelite religion adopted monotheism only in the waning period of the monarchy and not at Mount Sinai. Most of those who are engaged in scientific work in the interlocking spheres of the Bible, archaeology and the history of the Jewish people – and who once went into the field looking for proof to corroborate the Bible story – now agree that the historic events relating to the stages of the Jewish people’s emergence are radically different from what that story tells…”. It appears then that the archaeological records also support many of the biblical mythicist’s findings and their source materials/literary/historical evidences (and statements based on overwhelming lack of evidences).
Francesca Stavrakopoulou is a biblical scholar and broadcaster, currently Professor of Hebrew Bible and Ancient Religion at the University of Exeter, with a main focus of research on the Hebrew Bible and on Israelite and Judahite history and religion. She also explores and discusses various biblical historical subjects, Abrahamic religions real historical realities, archaeological evidences and their origins and texts development as a TV presenter on BBC2 and Channel 4.
In her most recent book God: An Anatomy, her scholarly findings from many years of research also likewise show that about three thousand years ago, in the Southwest Asian lands we now call Israel and Palestine, aka ancient Canaan, a group of people worshipped a complex pantheon of deities, led by the father god called El. El had seventy children, who were gods in their own right. One of them was a minor storm deity, known as Yahweh. But not only that, Yahweh had a body, a wife, offspring and colleagues. He fought monsters and mortals. He gorged on food and wine, wrote books, and took walks and naps. But he would eventually become something far larger and far more abstract: the God of the monotheistic religions, aka Abrahamic religions (Blog author’s note – this would eventually become the Jesus character’s dad a few centuries later btw, who of course would go on to declare that shopping, uploading Youtube videos and mowing the lawn on the new Sunday sabbath was OK, that everyone in the world, including even the Japanese and North American Native Peoples, can become a risen floating zombie some day, and that garlic butter shrimp pasta, lobster, bacon and crab salad were permissible to eat, well he didn’t actually really say that anywhere but some guy on tv said that he was 110% sure that he allegorically and metaphorically said it probably, anyway…).
Professor Francesca Stavrakopoulou reveals that this Abrahamic God’s cultural DNA stretches back centuries before the Bible was even written, and persists in the tics and twitches of our own society, whether we are believers or not. Examining God’s body, from his head to his hands, feet and genitals, she shows (with textual and archaeological evidences) how the much later invented Western idea of “God” developed and mutated from this original Late Bronze/Iron Age primitive desert alpha male tribal god. That it was at first the “high god”, El, who presides over a heavenly court of deities; he has a divine consort and a son or deputy who is depicted as a military champion, often a storm-spirit, subduing the primordial sea monster so as to bring order to the world. This deputy is often encountered and worshipped on wild and exposed mountain tops. In Syria, his name is Ba’al, “the master”. But in fact the texts of Hebrew scripture depict the later god of Israel, Yahweh, as behaving in almost exactly the same way as Ba’al: he is a storm-god, a warrior, the conqueror of primeval chaos, a habitue of sacred mountain tops such as Sinai. More startlingly, he is spoken of with much the same level of intensely physical vocabulary as the gods of the earlier pantheon, and over centuries eventually El has mutated to become the new tribal version Yahweh.
Language that most religious readers have unreflectively treated as vaguely poetic licence (God’s right arm, the soles of his feet, his internal organs, his face, his breath, even his genitals) is shown to be rooted in mythical conventions that cannot be taken as straightforwardly metaphorical. It belongs in a mindset for which the divine is a hugely magnified version of physical human dominance – male (and sexually predatory as his followers were), aggressive, imagined in terms of conventional primitive Levantine masculine glamour. But, in this revelatory study, Francesca Stavrakopoulou presents a vividly corporeal image of God: a human-shaped deity who walks and talks and weeps and laughs, who is jealous, angry, repents and seeks vengeance, who eats, sleeps, feels, and breathes, and who is undeniably seen as visitations of the Levant warrior alpha male. The biblical god may have had a comprehensive theological makeover by the time the Hebrew Scriptures reached their present form, but the invented Iron Age untamed desert alpha male deity of archaic west Asian and Middle Eastern myth is behind the later added literary makeup and never far away. There is even solid archaeological evidence for the god of Israel, like his earlier counterparts in the region, as originally having a female divine consort. Here is a portrait – arrived at through the author’s close examination of and research into the Bible – of a god in ancient myths and rituals who was a product of a particular society, at a particular time, made in the image of the people who lived then, shaped by their own circumstances, experiences, wishes and of their primitive views of the world and of others living in that world. (see also jesusneverexisted.com/yahwehbrutalhungrygodlingofwar). More information in the included interview video below.
A short video which better explains some of the previously mentioned facts up to now, i.e. – How in the mythological fables the talking serpent eventually became Satan by going backwards in time because he didn’t exist yet, how the biblical God really is Satan who creates the evil (Isaiah 45:7) and then performs evil under the guise of his other name/names/identities and also by giving himself permission to commit his evil for your own good to stop you from thinking and using your brain, which you should be thankful for. This topic of foreign deities, characters and religious astrotheology concepts being borrowed and incorporated by Jewish scribes and priests from ancient Mesopotamian religions, Zoraoastrian religion, ancient Canaanite and even Egyptian religions ideas and characters will be discussed. (Even how their god “Yahweh” is just one of several gods borrowed from other Bronze Age pagan Semitic peoples and ancient Canaanite religions (including “El” and others), who just mutated and was molded into their own personal “national god of Israel” aka the desert cacodemon Yahweh deity, usually in the form of a “storm god” or a “warrior deity”).
Back in the biblical hocus pocus universe times and lands, demons and demon possessions was about as common as people today with dandruff or headaches, but where did they all go? or more importantly where did they all come from anyway? More later about this very eye-opening information and illuminating exposé of the real origins of the much later invented superheroes, deities, demons, netherworld hell and punishments, astrotheologies, lakes of fire, zombies resurrections, spirits, characters and other wacko abstract concepts, where they all originated from and how they mutated and mutated some more (including even right up to that deviled ham spread logo guy and today’s movies) etc, that nothing is what it seems and as most people erroneously think and invent basically.
The birthing of a many-faced and very primitive contradictory tribal deity and future father of the jesus character (and not nearly as wise or all-knowing and all-powerful or as good a warrior, teacher, doctor or chef as some people pretend and claim either), elaborating on some of the previously made points.
I had to add this bit of information that’s directly related to the above video, because of all the ridiculous hocus pocus fable events, including the new on the scene tribal god’s mass killings, plagues and smitings of Israelites and other enemy peoples back and forth like a boring lamenting killfest smorgasbord, and other nonsensical killings and rubbish in the book of Exodus, although not on the scale of the most well known episodes some of which I’ve mentioned at this blog, Moses’ brother Aaron is one character that I always thought was a really weird strange one just like a comic book character, and the episodes including him always get overlooked unfortunately and never really even explored, unfortunately I say because it’s plain downright hilarious and bizarre comedic kitsch rubbish at it’s lowbrow finest, it’s practically a 3 stooges episode. So let me get this straight…after all the magical hocus pocus miracles, staffs into snakes, death angels and plagues and the whole parting and walking through the Red Sea thing and glorious freedom from slavery and Egypt finally (although not long afterwards the Israelites are already crying and complaining wishing they were back in Egypt), eventually Moses walks up and down a mountain “8 times” in all talking to the new desert cacodemon Yahweh-Jehovah (this after Yahweh-Jehovah arrives on top with hot burning fire, lava and smoke clouds, thunder and lightning and the earth quaking just like a volcano, including a great loud trumpet concert, it was quite an impressive show for everyone at the camp below basically), and then including even bringing his brother Aaron up “twice” to see and listen to Yahweh-Jehovah god in person also because Yahweh told him to bring him along, but not long after during the 6th time that Moses is up on the mountain alone for 40 days, his brother it seems was apparently not that impressed seeing and listening to the Master of the Universe and Midian after all, and he soon instead tells the Israelites that it was actually the golden calf who is their god that led them to freedom and out of Egypt, a golden calf that he even makes with his own hands and he also starts sacrificing to it on a special alter he personally made too, and after that he even proclaims a great joyous festival for the next day for all the Israelites to eat and drink and sing and perform sacrifices to the golden calf!. Then after this laughable stabbing his brother Moses and his God in the back episode the absurdity continues…the God and Moses command the slaughtering and deaths of thousands of the Israelites, telling the priestly Levites tribe to go around the camp with their swords and killing their brothers, friends and neighbors, and the next day Yahweh even sending a plague on the ones left over as icing on the cake. But what happens to traitorous Aaron the rogue ringleader for his crimes? Absolutely nothing! He gets totally unpunished and suffering no consequences! lol, this is so farcical and absurd that I can’t fathom how people fall for and believe these absurd fables (because he was the official handpicked by Yahweh-Jehovah to be high priest of the Israelites and leader of the priests? probably, but it still makes him basically an outright traitorous enemy and usurper to Moses and his god in leading a very major rebellion-revolution, he even makes the later Judas character seem like just a clumsy oaf choirboy). Interestingly not long afterwards and very amusing again, his two sons Nadab and Abihu get killed by the volcano god also, why?…because during all the many god demanded sacrificings going on continually they absentmindedly lit their incense censers with regular fire coals instead of god’s sacrificing fire coals, so Yahweh-Jehovah god had a major fit and instantly zapped them to death for their disobedience….wow, take that you disobedient scoundrels! (and when you think the absurdity episode is finished…get this…after fiery zapping of the brothers then god demands, as in he “demands” it, that their father Aaron, his family and all the Israelites show absolutely no grief, sympathy, empathy or mourn the deaths of the brothers in any way whatsoever, he literally “demands” it, as well as to not touch them but immediately drag and dump their bodies outside the camp…pronto immediately!, so that all the sacrificings don’t get interrupted or slowed down. Now that sure is a volcano god who likes to be in complete control and get things done the right way that’s for sure, Jesus’ dad is very, very particular it seems or else he’ll zap you like Thanos or Iron Man…e.g. – God: “Grrrr! Using regular fire coals instead of my special sacrificing fire coals for incense!?, Oh that’s it you’re dead…zaaap! zaaap!). It’s like the biblical god, the superheroes and characters or even just the authors themselves had textbook cases of schizotypal personality disorder. On top of other later stuff that adds much more to the ridiculousness and killings/smitings/plagues categories, believe it or not many churches today consider this Aaron character an official saint with icons and church feast days, I don’t know what kind of kool-aid they’re all drinking or what book they’re reading because when I was a kid I read much better and much more interesting and much more believable comic books, suspension of disbelief much? (Just like Robert Tilton would say “I don’t make this stuff up“, in the books and comics writing biz this is aka a “plot twist” and “the old switcheroo”).
Dagnabit that Zoroastrianism!, just when you think you know them magical truths and secret cosmic news scoop secrets of the floating big guy in the sky, then you find out it’s just mostly that Zoroastrianism again, gimme that ol’ time religion and dang you Zoroastering shenanigans!, explaining the linear mutating continuum from early Judaism to Islam aka Judaism version 3.0 (More about the Zoroastrian, Mesopotamian, Egyptian and other ancient older pagan Levant religions beliefs, astrotheologies and abstract concepts that was adopted and mutated into Abrahamic religions in the previous Derreck Bennett video).
People and scholars for thousands of years have been searching for any written record or mention by anybody, particularly by any nearby nation’s written records or mentions that existed at the time about the astounding magical events and characters involved in the Exodus stories-novels that are supposed to be some of the most important historical events to have ever taken place in the history of the world supposedly. However the archaeological record and written evidences (and overwhelming non-existence of corroborating evidences) show that the stories of the creation, of the flood, of Abraham, of Jacob, of the descent into and the exodus from Egypt, of the career of Moses and the Jews in the desert, of Joshua and his soldiers, of the judges and their clients, are all apocryphal and mostly fabricated histories at a much later period of Jewish history, even up to today all that has been found is…crickets.
Yep,, Satan was originally actually the desert cacodemon Yahweh-Jehovah’s helper pal and friend and one of the “70 sons of god” and not an evil enemy, until the later borrowed and adapted Zoroastrian, Mesopotamian, Egyptian and other ancient older pagan Levant and Canaanite religions beliefs, astrotheologies and abstract concepts, (including primitive desert blood magic, zombies, eternal burning worms/pitchforking, lakes of fire etc), which would then mean that the OT god is actually ancient Persian (Iranian) and the newer later version Satan-Diabolus Devil character is also, so it’s actually mostly the Zoroastrian shenanigans that’s being taught and preached by televangelists, their fabulist minions and others for their temples shekels coffers and for even more shekels faith seeds.
Like I said “Thou shalt not kill” only applies to your own people or village or slave owners, when it’s other foreign people, cattle, babies or religions then there’s a loophole and it’s actually open season, the same actually goes for coveting in the OT text (which probably hardly anybody has actually read in its entirety anyway and the different versions), because you’re just not supposed to covet your own people’s/neighbor’s slaves, oxen, sheep, tents etc, And you actually can beat your slave because god said so in his very own book so it’s straight from the horse’s mouth master of the universe, because they’re your rightful property just like your sex slaves, camels and goats, loopholes are really great. (I should also note that the Charlton Heston and Yul Brynner movie is wrongly presented, misleading and omits lots of information from the mythological text narrative, as briefly explained above, and perhaps even most shocking to most…Charlton Heston and Yul Brynner were actually only just actors who were only pretending to be a Moses and a Pharaoh with help from Hollywood special effects, that’s right they were outright frauds portraying fable characters with the magic of Hollywood special effects!, (I very highly doubt Yul Brynner could turn even 1 staff into a snake let alone 2 staffs into snakes, I don’t have any evidence or proof to support my personal view but that’s what I believe), and not only that… Yvonne De Carlo who portrayed Moses’ wife Zipporah she even went on to become Lily Munster…which could very well mean that…The Munsters were actually based on real people and events!?).
Francesca Stavrakopoulou mentioned earlier commenting on some of the topics discussed here, and who probably knows a thing or two more about these things than the average telescamvangelist (Many telescamvangelists over the years have declared that she is the literal incarnation of the prophesied Anti-Joyce Meyer risen from the 9th Circle of Hell and the dark netherworld concubine of even Azazel himself (Woe unto you Ben-El Shareem!), and that her books will steal the promised faith shekels seeds from their holy temple coffers and book publishers prophets, they also accuse her of bringing on the nefarious great false Beelzebub predictor who with his infernal archaeological locusts, goats and miracle working 7-headed beast dragon paleontologist from the sea Damien who will cause many to abominationally eat bacon and cream cheese wrapped shrimp, crab salad sandwiches and erect a golden roofed Red Lobster restaurant on the Jerusalem Temple Mount as an ultimate apocalyptic abomination of diabolical necromantical desolations of super-duper nefarious abominations and culminating in her and Joyce Meyer in an epic wrestling steel cage match for control of Jerusalem, Tokyo, Honolulu and probably the world, so that should be interesting and a good one to get popcorn for).
The new god is the old god is the old gods, the old devil is the old god is the new god, the old angels are the new demons and the old demons are the new angels, the new god and gods and their demon-angels only lived in the Middle East deserts for some obscure weird reason which even they can’t explain…it’s the same ol’ primitive Iron Age hocus pocus fantasies and dreamscape delusions.
And lastly as another much later example highlighted by the Nebra sky disc, dated by archaeologists to around 1600 BCE during the time of the Bronze Age Unetice Culture in Central Europe, the areas from whence the earliest Croatian tribes were located in antiquity and also called Hyperborea by later Greek and Roman writers, which would make the decorated disk at least 3,600 years old, and probably much older as that is only when it was buried with estimates of being 3,800 to 4,100 years old (the inlaid gold symbols are interpreted generally as the Sun or Full Moon, a lunar crescent, and the Pleiades star cluster, two golden arcs along the sides to mark the angle between the solstices and together it features the oldest concrete depiction of the cosmos yet known from anywhere in the world). Also it is now proven scientifically that the ancestors of the later Croats, the Balto-Slavic speaking peoples, Germanic and Celts populated Europe long before 4 thousand years ago, which also connects with DNA and genetic evidences the earliest pre-migration Croatian tribes to the Bronze Age Unetice Culture, these times and geographically coterminous areas. The circa. 3,600-4,100 year old disc was made long before any Germanic or Balto-Slavic languages groups appeared, we don’t even know what language it was that they used or whether it is connected to any modern languages that exist today, perhaps probably a Hyperborean proto-language older than any European language that German and Balto-Slavic languages eventually sprang forth from. (Interesting to note also, genetically, on the Y chromosome line, a majority (87%) of Croats belong to one of the three major European Y-DNA haplogroups – Haplogroup I (38%), Haplogroup R1a (35%) and Haplogroup R1b (16%). All three of these groups appeared in Europe during the Upper Paleolithic around 30,000-20,000 BCE. Furthermore, the dominant presence of Haplogroup I-M170 is rather interesting, as it is considered the oldest and only native European haplogroup and is found nowhere else. The Haplogroup I-M170 exists only in Europe and is fairly widespread, but in relatively smaller percentages extending westward and eastward. Its frequency in the Croatian lands and among Croats is high, but the only populations that have similar levels of the I Haplogroup are the Scandinavians. Haplogroup I-M170 has been shown to have weathered the last glacial maximum in the lands corresponding to modern day Croatia and surrounding area in Central Europe and then migrated north as the ice sheets retreated. Also, by these statistics we can clearly see that the strongest Haplogroup in Croatians is Haplogroup I-M170 and that we share subclades of Haplogroup I-M170 with Scandinavians more than anyone else in Europe, so the early European populations that went on to become Scandinavians also went on to become Croatians, and in the process the preceding Hyperboreans). But the main point is, this and many other evidences are just more proof that people lived and had functioning societies and technologies manufacturing capabilities of various items in those areas during those times. But we need to ask why would a Zoroastrian Yahweh-Jehovah desert tribal deity only be vacationing, floating and hanging around the Middle East then? Why only galavanting there talking only to a few guys in the desert once in a very long while or once every few centuries, just to give secret blood magic news scoops, sacrificings, slaughtering and fashion and food eating tips? If he’s so great why not tell people in Europe? or in Asia? or the Native Peoples living in California and Mexico etc? Why the heck only floating around in and fixated with only remote Levant area deserts doing hocus pocus and that’s it? Why only giving news scoops advice to traveling recluse nobodies living in caves or tents in the middle of nowhere? and then just smitings and lamentings and failed prophecies constantly back and forth? That makes absolutely no sense if you’re supposedly the all-powerful, all-knowing master of the universe and of the planet but you can’t even find the Danube river or Japan or Mexico to tell them too, (if he did can you imagine just how many more faith shekels seeds could be had for the temples coffers? lots more that’s for sure, and lots more sheep’s blood too as a bonus), it instead sounds much more like just yet another puny invented ho-hum desert tribal deity and his contradictory long-winded jimble jamble speeches…which it is. (some scholars suggest there are 3 reasons why it didn’t appear to anyone in Europe to pass on his news scoops and grooming tips…1- either he was unable to as per the chariots of iron scenario, 2- he didn’t want to because he knew full well they wouldn’t give up their bacon and pork roasts recipes for anyone, or 3- because the talking snake gave him the wrong directions and he ended up in Antarctica, many scholars are even still today debating this contradictory problematic topic).
*Author’s note – To better explain this post title choice of wording it should be known that today’s word “god” is actually from an etymology that is Gothic and Proto-Germanic from ǥuđán, originally a pagan religion word meaning “pouring forth” as in libation, pouring forth a liquid as an offering to an idol or spirit or an invocation at a burial mound, first introduced into Wulfla’s 4th century Gothic Bible. Webster’s New Collegiate Dictionary says that the origin of the word ‘God’ comes from a Germanic word ‘Gad,’ pronounced as “Gohdt” and coming from a word simply meaning the “invoked one” and even “Lord Moon”, as in conjuring forth and summoning up spirits and power, therefore it’s not a name. And the included “-Jehovah” name is just an often used wrongly pronounced and spelled version of Yahweh, and if anything should be properly pronounced as “Yehovah”, the same actually goes for Jesus and Joshua and Judah and many others (Yeshua, Yehoshua and Yahuda etc), “Jehovah” is a Latinization version from the reformation in the 16th century and so is incorrectly pronounced today because there is no “J” sound in Hebrew. Jehovah’s Witnesses are especially constantly wrong and shooting themselves in the foot regarding even just this topic, knowingly pronouncing their god’s name could very well be blasphemous or at the very least heretical. (More information and examples of very evident and easy to see numerous contradictions, errors, failed predictions, invented mythologies/fables, (largely anonymously written at that actually and proven spurious forged writings along with interpolated mutating absurd ideas), ignorance of the actual real natural world processes, primitive Bronze-Iron Age worldviews, cosmological and deserts blood magic beliefs and basically just plain made-up rubbish in the bible and Abrahamic religions in general, as well as among many of their propagandists even today of course, at National Security Alert: Foreign Televangelists, Cults, Sects).
This is some bonus article material I came across after finishing this post, and information which falls in line with a number of the points I mentioned so I’m including it here. Coincidentally the scholarly input and article is even from a respected Israeli newspaper as well as being the longest running newspaper in the country, so it’s not some floating multi-headed creatures and beasts jimble jamble ramblings on a fringe hocus pocus blood magic tin foil hat website. As a result without a doubt this information will then anger many hocus pocus charlatans, fabulist gurus and of course all the telescamvangelists I mentioned here (who will probably pronounce the newspaper and the findings of the scholars and archaeologists as blasphemous and heretical and being under the power of the great dragon and his fiery locusts and demon goats etc), the article information will also cause much lamenting and weeping among their various temples coffers guardian angels undoubtedly, which is the unpardonable transgression of course.
Article from haaretz.com.
Jewish God Yahweh Originated in Canaanite Vulcan, Says New Theory
The cult of YHWH as god of metallurgy originated among semi-nomadic copper smelters between the Bronze and Iron Age, suggests biblical scholar: And he was not worshipped only by Jews
TIMNA – Around 3,200 years ago, the great empires around the Mediterranean and the Middle East suddenly imploded. The Egyptians retreated from Canaan and the copper mines of Timna in the Negev, skulking back to the banks of the Nile. And in the arid wastes of southern Canaan, a new power arose.
The Timna mines were taken over by semi-nomadic tribes, which set up a mining operation that dwarfed the previous Egyptian industry.
This new desert kingdom would leave its mark on the main building at Timna: the Egyptian temple of Hathor, protector of miners. The new masters smashed the effigy of the Egyptian deity – leaving the fragments to be found by archaeologists more than 3,000 years later – and set up over the ruins of the temple a tent sanctuary, judging by the remains of heavy red and yellow fabric found in the 1970s.
There they worshipped a new god, one that had no apparent name or face.
That miners’ god was none other than the deity known by the four Hebrew letters YHWH, who would become the God of the Jews and, by extension, of Christians and Muslims, claims Nissim Amzallag, a biblical studies researcher at Ben-Gurion University.
According to Amzallag, long before becoming the deity of the Israelites, Yahweh was a god of metallurgy in the ancient Canaanite pantheon, worshipped by smelters and metalworkers throughout the Levant, not just by the Hebrews. His theory is not exactly widely accepted, but has recently been gaining traction.
Roughly from the 19th century, biblical scholars began looking at scripture less as records of divine revelations and more as historical and literary documents. This has led, for example, to the so-called “Documentary Hypothesis,” which considers the Torah, the first five books of the Bible, to be a compilation from multiple sources, each produced by different authors with their own beliefs and agendas.
But mysteries remain: where did the YHWH cult originate? Who were the first people to worship him? And how did he end up being the sole deity of a group called Israel, who, as their very name says (in Hebrew), didn’t even start out as a Yahwistic people, but as followers of El, the main god of the Canaanite pantheon?
Fire and brimstone
Most scholars already believe that the cult of Yahweh first emerged somewhere in the southern Levant, partly based on Egyptian texts from the late second millennium B.C.E. These documents describe groups of Canaanite nomads collectively known as Shasu, including one tribe named Shasu Yhw(h) – perhaps the first recorded Yahweh worshippers in history.
The Bible itself may contain a memory of this southern origin of Yahweh, as it tells us explicitly that God “came from Teman” (Habbakuk 3:3) or that he “went out of Seir” and “marched out of Edom” (Judges 5:4-5) – all toponyms associated with the area ranging from Sinai to the Negev and northern Arabia.
“Everybody recognizes these southern origins of Yahweh, but most scholars stop there,” Amzallag says. “This forms the basis of my theory as well, but I take it a step forward.”
Reading between the lines, the Bible contains clues pointing to an original identity for Yahweh as a metallurgical deity, he says.
In the Bible, Yahweh’s appearance is usually accompanied by volcanic-like phenomena. When he descends upon Mt. Sinai to reveal the Torah to the Jews, the mountain erupts in fire, spewing lava and billowing clouds accompanied by earthquakes and thunderstorms (Exodus 19:16-19).
In antiquity, metallurgical deities like the Greek Hephaestus or his eponymous Roman equivalent, Vulcan, were associated with volcanic descriptions – which closely mirror the smoke, fire, black slag and molten red metal produced in the smelting process, Amzallag says.
Poetic metaphors throughout the Bible describe Yahweh as a fiery deity who makes the mountains smoke (Psalms 144:5) and melts them down (Isaiah 63:19b), just like smelters melt down ore to obtain copper and other metals, the researcher notes. In fact, in Psalm 18:18 Yahweh is depicted as an anthropomorphized furnace: “smoke rose from his nostrils; consuming fire came from his mouth, burning coals blazed out of it.”
To ancient people, the process of melting down rocks to extract metal would have “appeared completely preternatural and required a divine explanation,” Amzallag told Haaretz.
Yahweh’s metallurgical attributes were also on display in the pillar of fire and smoke by which he guides the Hebrews in the desert (Exodus 13:21) and the cloud that accompanies his visits to the Tent of Meeting (Exodus 33:9-10), a simpler version of the Tabernacle in which Moses speaks face to face with God.
The description of this tent bears remarkable similarities to the sanctuary in Timna, further suggesting that 3,000 years ago, this place may have been dedicated to the worship of Yahweh, Amzallag maintains.
Yahweh, god of the Edomites?
But wait a minute – the Bible and most archaeologists agree that after the collapse of the Egyptian empire in the 12th century B.C.E., Timna was taken over by the Edomites, not the Israelites.
While the Bible goes to great lengths to describe Israel’s neighbors – such as the Edomites, the Midianites and the Moabites – as dastardly pagans, the text also betrays that Yahweh was worshipped by these nations too, possibly even before the Israelites did so, Amzallag notes. Genesis 36, for example, makes it clear that the Edomites are descendants of Esau, Jacob’s brother, and lists Edomite monarchs who ruled “before any Israelite king reigned” (Genesis 36:31).
The Ammonites and Moabites are listed as descendants of Lot (Genesis 19:37-38), the nephew of Abraham and pious Yahweh-believer who escaped the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah.
In other words, the genealogies of the Bible contain the memory of an ancient confederation of Canaanite peoples, who may have considered themselves all descendants of Abraham and who all worshipped Yahweh alongside other gods, Amzallag posits.
We should trust the Bible on this, he says, because its editors wouldn’t have wanted to admit that the cult of Yahweh was not exclusive to Israel. “So, if they reference it, it must be true,” Amzallag concludes.
Further biblical evidence of this broadened base of worshippers can be found in the Book of Exodus, where a key role is played by Jethro, Moses’ father-in-law, who lives near the mountain of God (alternatively called Horeb and Sinai).
It is Jethro who indirectly leads Moses to his first meeting with Yahweh at the burning bush. And it is he who inaugurates the Tent of Meeting with a sacrifice and proclaims that “Yahweh is greater than all other gods” for having freed the Hebrew slaves from Egypt (Exodus 18:7-12).
But Moses’ father-in-law is not an Israelite: he is described alternatively as a Midianite priest (Exodus 3:1) and a Kenite (Judges 1:16).
Now, according to Bible, the Midianites were descendants of Midian, another son of Abraham, which again supports the idea of the existence of an extended family of Yahwistic peoples. The Kenites, on the other hand, are a tribe descended from Cain and described as living among all the peoples of the Levant and specializing in crafts and metalworking, which, according to Amzallag, is further evidence that Yahweh’s first incarnation was as a smelting god.
Note that the so-called Midianite-Kenite hypothesis goes back to the 19th century, when biblical scholars saw Jethro’s story as evidence that these groups introduced the Israelites to the worship of Yahweh. Amzallag seems to be the first to stress the metallurgical side of this hypothesis and link Yahweh specifically to the rites and cults of ancient miners and smelters.
Copper mining at Timna and at other remote sites like Faynan, today in southern Jordan, was central to the region’s economy, employing not just miners and smelters, but blacksmiths, traders and other workers in every town and village of Canaan. These people, identifiable as the biblical Kenites, would have been held in high regard and seen as being close to the divine because they possessed knowledge about the secret and mysterious process of copper smelting, Amzallag says.
Or maybe the god of storms
“There is no doubt that at least for the Edomites, and possibly for their neighbors, religion had to go hand in hand with what was their most important activity,” says Erez Ben-Yosef, an archaeologist from Tel Aviv University who leads a team excavating at Timna. “They depended on the success of these operations and they definitely would have felt they needed the help of a god in the complex smelting process and in organizing these mining expeditions to distant, arid areas.”
We have no direct proof that the metallurgical god, worshipped at the Edomite sanctuary in Timna from the 12th to the 10th century B.C.E., was Yahweh: there is no inscription invoking his name. But the kinship described in the Bible between the Israelites and the Edomites, and the metallurgical attributes of Yahweh in the holy text, are “compelling arguments” supporting Amzallag’s theory that this god was worshipped by multiple peoples as a deity connected to metallurgy, Ben-Yosef concludes.
There are skeptics.
“The theory is interesting but I don’t think there is enough evidence to say that the first worshippers of Yahweh were metallurgists,” says Thomas Romer, a world-renowned expert in the Hebrew Bible and a professor at the College de France and the University of Lausanne. There is strong evidence connecting the Israelites and the Edomites, and maybe the latter worshipped Yahweh as well, says Romer, author of “The Invention of God,” a book about the history of Yahweh and the biblical text.
However, Romer disagrees with Amzallag’s interpretation of the supposed volcanic phenomena described in the Bible. He thinks they are more indicative of a god of storms and fertility, similar to the Canaanite god Baal.
“It is quite common for storm gods in antiquity to make the mountains tremble, but is this really an allusion to volcanism or is it just showing the power of the god?” Romer says.
Iron trumps bronze
If, and that’s a big if, Amzallag’s theory is correct, a niggling question remains: how did this smelting god, worshipped by the semi-nomadic peoples all over the southern Levant become the solitary national deity of just one of these nations, the Israelites?
That may have had to do with the rise of the Iron Age, Amzallag says. Bronze is an alloy of copper and tin, two relatively rare elements. Iron is much easier to find and just needs to be combined with another common element, carbon, to produce one of the strongest metals known to man: steel.
By the 9th century B.C.E., copper production at Timna and the rest of the Levant had all but shut down and the process of smelting had lost much of its mystique. In the Iron Age, Mediterranean metal workers lost their elite status and were simply seen as skilled craftsmen rather than quasi-priests or magicians.
In parallel, their gods either lost their importance in the local pantheon and were forgotten, or were transformed, acquiring different attributes and characteristics, Amzallag says. Meanwhile, the loose coalition of Canaanite nomadic tribes who once saw themselves as descendants of the same patriarch, had morphed into a patchwork of small, centralized kingdoms, each vying for the status of regional power. Conflict became inevitable, and indeed the Bible is filled with stories of wars between the Israelites and their neighbors, who are invariably depicted as evil.
As each nation attempted to gain political and military supremacy over the other, the Israelites may have also tried to establish their spiritual superiority, depicting themselves as favored children of a powerful god, or, to use a biblical turn of phrase – a Chosen People.
“To gain primacy and become the chosen people of God, they had to remove the metallurgical origins of Yahwism and disconnect him from the other nations,” says Amzallag. But while weeding out explicit mentions of Yahweh’s roots, the editors of the Bible could not completely ignore the traditions and stories that were already an integral part of the identity of this cult, he suggests.
Yahweh’s fiery attributes or the stories of a shared Abrahamic origin for the peoples of the Levant are echoes of more ancient beliefs, he says, clues that remind us that “once there was no exclusive connection between a God and Israel. Initially, it was the God El that belonged to all.”
REPRESENTATION OF HYPERBOREANS LIVING AND EXISTING AT A TIME THAT THE BIBLICAL BIBLE UNIVERSE AND PLANET DIDN’T EXIST YET. Basically, so then according to the Abrahamic religion’s very own fables time-history chronology narratives, during the times of the Hyperboreans and the Paleolithic Stone Age in Europe as pictured above about 40,000 BCE (and in India, Pakistan, China, Japan and in all of Asia actually), they would like people who have at least the common sense of at least a 5 year old, to faithfully believe their various anonymously mutating fables and contradictions-filled stories as being some sort of divine unerring truth of truths and holy unquestionable supertruths? that’s absolutely absurd though for lots and lots of proven valid reasons lol. For one, during the time pictured above circa. 40,000 BCE in Europe, then what was going on in ancient Canaan, Egypt and the Middle East in general during the same time period? Well, according to their very own holy news scoops scriptural timelines and revealed wisdom information esoteric mystical secrets from their god…nothing…that’s right absolutely nothing, why?…because it and the planet didn’t even exist yet. The Yahweh-Jehovah deity didn’t even open 1 snow storage house or tip over even 1 rain jar yet, before even 1 Leviathan sea monster was fought, heck the Moon and Sun didn’t even exist yet either, which was made after the Earth anyway. This would extend from the times of the Cro-Magnon Stone Age populations right through to the Mesolithic Period to the final period of hunter-gatherer cultures to the end of the Last Glacial Maximum Ice Age and Neolithic and Holocene Periods, and the different proven cultures and civilizations existing on the continent during those times who left behind their evidences. Which would mean that the much, much later Abrahamic religions so-called “history” is mainly anonymously written fabricated deserts stories and fables…..or on the other hand that the ancient Hyperboreans in this case, were either made by some other deity and then most probably transplanted on the planet from somewhere else (i.e. – already living in Europe and existing but completely unknown about by the biblical god), or that they only left behind allegorical and metaphor bones, pottery, artifacts and cave paintings etc, i.e. – only just deceptive illusionary abstract concept archaeological remains evidences that aren’t actually even real (probably “planted” by the seven Princes of Hell), primarily to test our faith and gullibility so as to see if the person is truly worthy of a future zombification to co-rule the planet (as well as to joyfully partake in the torture and destruction of the many numerous deceived fools who actually did believe the illusionary archaeological evidences instead of with faith steadfastly trusting the Yahweh-Jehovah god’s very own written words and eternal truths of the real world), that’s the only logical conclusion.
Basically, to be a so-called biblical literalist, preacher and/or apologist, you have to follow the example of reading comic books, it’s so simple even a 5 year old knows how to do that, i.e. – you can’t just read this and that comic book panel, skip a few panels then read a few more panels you agree with and then skip some more panels going back and forth all over the place using that system, reading only the panels you like or agree with then making up the rest and not even read all the panels which tell the story, what sort of a scoundrel fabulist charlatan would read a comic book like that? Who would even make a superhero movie based on reading their comic book that way? Exactly, to know how to properly understand the presented information/claims you have to first at least know how to read a comic book properly, ipso facto.
(Viewpoints and information presented here do not necessarily reflect the viewpoints of, nor should they be attributed to, FIS-Ski, FINA, IHF, FIFA, SAG-AFTRA, WFC, WWF, UPU, UNESCO, WMO, WWE, IWMI, ITF, ICMP, Yum! Brands, Inc., Phillips 66, Hostess Brands, ExxonMobil or their affiliates, directors or officers. All information found therein is from the mentioned sources (alleged and non-alleged sources, or rumors, fables etc claimed to be a source, in whole or in part used or argued for by the alleged source text narrative or by the individual and whatever it is that they are alluding to, presupposing or inventing to imply that said alleged sources may mean or may really mean if claimed instead to be allegorical or a metaphor, and/or their personal invented ideas which are then purported to be the source or a source for the claim presented as being allegedly a true factual source), and/or a common sense exploration rebuttal and/or personal known verified information retort opinion of this blog’s author vis-a-vis any claims, predictions, questionable or wrong information, threats or insinuations made or implied by said religion’s alleged “so-called” purported sources, whether if anonymously written or with inserted interpolations and/or applied authorship after the fact, or by the organization, cult, sect or by their organization’s representative leading guru, spokesperson, propagandist or follower/lackey etc, or by the person purporting to be the or a spokesperson and/or representative of the religion or of the claim being forwarded as being true and factual evidence, (this blog’s author does not consider any personal assumptions, dreams, hallucinations, hazy fuzzy feelings, prickly ears, hearsay statements (especially anonymous hearsay, anonymous fiction narratives and/or anonymous misrepresentations of actual known history and/or anonymously claimed unverified genealogies, blood magic powers, zombifications sorcery etc), plagiarism, out of context musings or groundless insinuations and ad hoc rationalizations as being a valid source of anything, all strictly as supplementary information for the benefit of the reader).
Well, this is my first official post here so I should give some general background information about why. This first post is largely a repost from another blog of mine, but that blog I started up as strictly a Croatia topics blog after coming back from my most recent vacation trip there (hence which better explains the original post title that I kept). That blog revolved around a wide variety of Croatia themed topics which I thought would be interesting as a benefit to the reader who otherwise may have been clueless about Croatia and Croatian topics and stuff…Croatian history, language, alphabet and literature, Croatian school system, military history and current military topics (I have a military background so I thought it made sense to include those), political history, as well as the current and past music scene and artists/bands, fashions, foods, beers and wines, recipes, hairstyles, bikinis and bikini history, (I did a few models and fashions posts of course for women’s rights), tattoos and tattoo history and the current tattoo shops scene and annual tattoo conventions in Croatia, occasionally sports posts about skiing, hockey, handball, water polo, martial arts, tennis etc, the Croatian television shows scene and film industry, Game of Thrones filming locations in Croatia and other filming locations in Croatia, shipbuilding, high performance electric vehicle manufacturing, computers, smartbenches, smartphones, internet (IoT) and software technologies, green/clean eco-friendly technologies, products and services, Croatian manufacturing companies and products of all sorts, electric trams, trains and transportation, animal and environment protection (especially the bears, wolves, lynx, dolphins habitat, forests and water conservation projects), medieval reenactment groups, ballet/opera/theatre, castles, forts and manors, winter cottages/chalets renting scene, archaeology, photography, painters, art/artists/art galleries, pubs, cafes, restaurants, Croatian names and surnames history, winter and summer and beach activities and events, and even including a few personal vacation photos and videos (However they repeatedly got in a tizzy and upset because of a few added images I used when posting about “women accordionists” (and they weren’t even my images or videos either), which may or may not have shown some “nippleage” because some were sort of artsy photos also (and there are lots and lots and a plethora of women accordionists and accordionists babes photos on the web believe it or not, definitely not your great grandfather’s accordionists that’s for sure and I’m actually surprised they didn’t force my blog to have a sneakers brand, some fast food corporate logo or a rainbow on the homepage)…basically it revolved around a whole bunch of topics, however most of the topics information was taken directly from articles and other international news websites sources so it was stuff already well known about and floating around the internet anyway. Besides, after already LIKE-ing, Thumbs Up-ing and commenting on every Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and Tik-Tok profile in existence and every cyberghetto social profile in the world, I’ve moved on to be part of highly classified and an intricate hidden collective of top secret internet sites and forums which directly affect pretty well all countries and governments on the planet including overseeing false flag operation projects and other highly confidential stuff, probably behind things you see on the news everyday as well as a few unexplained paranormal phenomena websites, and of course about the actual all too very real approaching oil and gas zombies apocalypse (for those who have absolutely no clue about any Croatia topics, some basic happenings and informational stuff for English readers can be found at croatiaweek.com, secret-zagreb.com, skijanje.hr, danipiva.net, www,hnk.hr, rijecki-karneval.hr, spancirfest.com, zff.hr, coolinarika.com, croatia.hr).
But anyway, then one day I decided to touch upon the topics of the spurious televangelists-scamvangelists charlatans and their happy-clappy fabulist minions, which I explain about why below in the repost. Because then one day I just had enough and felt I had to elaborate about the general subject and the related nefarious shenanigans, outright lies, obscurantism, the pathologically fixated and neurotically obsessed delirium acts, deception and especially the blatant fakery involved which reaches the point of disturbing and insulting also. The post was pretty basic and not that long at first, and then I found myself updating it occasionally (probably after channel surfing some day and feeling insulted as the scamvangelist/fabulist/preacher or just plain ol’ Jesus Junkie was making it seem like I and all the viewers are simpleton gullible imbeciles who believe anything and any hocus pocus fables just because they’re on the idiot box behind microphones, that we don’t have brains, reason or common sense logic to think for ourselves or eyes to read or see but instead need some consumed snake oil salesman/saleswoman to fill our brains with personally fabricated ideas, anonymously written fiction stories (that even they don’t know by whom, where or when it was written or even why most of the time…hint-hint scamvangelists because it wasn’t even meant for me or you or for even anybody thousands of years in the future, can anyone reading this teleport to thousands of years ago? then it may involve you) including magical superhero characters and hocus pocus primitive Bronze Age and Iron Age desert tribal blood magic cults, various personal (and contradictory) abstract concepts and ideas that aren’t even based in reality or the real world and cosmos, that as if our very eternity depended on their personal jimble jamble shows instead, I was totally disgusted with their insinuations that, such as in the Croatia example, that just because we don’t go around singing (“Give Me That”) “Ol’ Time Religion” that we were in danger of the eternal burning worms and pitchforking. Yep, I was even feeling victimized that the charlatan actor/actress on the idiot box was allowed to spread their personal psychosis delusions obsessive mythomania to the general public, and into children’s minds, and that if anything they should rightfully be put in prison instead for the safety of society and not be sent money to spread their tentacles further to conjure alternate bizarre realities and steal people’s real minds, personalities and identities (and their harvest faith seeds also of course which is the main prize).
As I continued to update the post occasionally now and then, it soon included more information and interesting facts-filled and eventually it had become the longest post in my whole blog, and I never even originally planned to post about the topic at all because it was the furthest thing from my mind, so how weird is that? Now after reading this post the reader may just say…”Oh you’re one of those unbelieving atheists etc…etc”, and to that I would have to simply reply yes…and no. Huh? whaaa? Whad’ya mean yes and no? Yep technically yes…and no. Why?…because if we’re talking here about the main deity character in all the Abrahamic religions, which includes Judaism, Christianity and Islam especially, who each claim to be followers of a one true real god, then I am absolutely definitely 100% an atheist and proud to be (Actually an atheist is better and more correctly understood also as a belief (“theism” meaning belief, the “a-” in “atheism” is understood as negation of the belief being claimed or presented) and as a proposition – something that is either true or false, referring to the propositional “content” of the presented belief, i.e. – according to the presented facts, details and evidences, or lack of evidences usually, of the presented belief and it’s claims, so the Atheist instead “believes” that the argued “content” of the belief logically using reason and known empirical facts warrants the decision to not believe (it’s practically not even a choice actually when understood correctly, more like a natural gut reaction common sense default reaction, e.g. – “Oh brother Billy here partake of this magical bread made with holy riboflavin and larva which will please the lord and keep away the wandering demon ghoulies”…”No thanks I’ll be an atheist on that one and make some stuffed peppers or throw something on the bbq instead”, or the fact of actually being required to believe ALL the presented written material, stories and ALL the claims being made, because there is no picking and choosing the parts you like or agree with and disregarding other stuff or instead giving it personal abstract meanings using mental acrobatics and everything is fine and dandy you’re still in the immortal faithful club (or just throw your faith shekel into the bucket once in a while then think you’re guaranteed to be a future immortal zombie, lol, that’s not the way the belief and faith biz operates because you have to accept the whole package as in everything and all the stories…young earth, flat earth, talking snakes, Jonahs in fish, rising zombies, floating outer space beings and hybrid humans, teleporting, ALL the visions, ALL the hocus pocus, bizarro adventure stories and desert blood magic sorcery, stopping earth rotation and moon orbiting, believing in ALL the holy righteous OT Yahwehism-Jehovahism genocides and killings and primitive behaviorisms, ALL the contradictions and customs traditions etc, etc, etc, you can’t just personally modify, mutate, change things or take only what you want to believe like at a smorgasbord or an all you can eat restaurant, because doing that is just admitting defeat and proves that the mythicists and real world historians, and archaeologists, paleontologists and scientists are right and correct ipso facto, and doing so would just make the person no better than any begging grovelling telescamvangelist fabulist charlatan), if the presented claims, stories, contradictions, wrong information and related mutated theologies, abstract concepts and primitive behaviorisms and beliefs are shown to be not valid…then obviously to believe in said arguments and presented claims the person likewise cannot accept them as having any validity…
…As for an “Agnostic” for them human reason is incapable of providing sufficient rational grounds and proofs to justify belief in the presented claims and alleged evidences of the belief in the presented god, or a god or gods or deity/deities or magical cosmic genie slave owning master butler genie being presented (Agnostics don’t consider abstract concepts that are not based in the real world as any kind of proof of anything, and faith in something for just faith’s sake without tangible evidence as not being a proof of anything either, only a time travel teleporting machine would help in gathering any proof or evidences of anything or corroborating anything claimed). Besides are the 3 Abrahamic religion’s “gods” the very same god as many of them claim and believe? (seriously, many of them think it’s the same thing and the exact same magical genie skydaddy cosmic butler) and that’s equally very problematic and absolutely ridiculous…lol, and is that the same god of the Jehovah’s Witnesses, Mormons and a plethora of other singular god based religions also as they claim? It’s impossible because of the mountain of contradictions and abstract concepts theologies at odds with each other and wrong information so naturally it’s impossible to believe it (unless the time travel teleporting machine thing like I said), an Atheist is sort of like an Agnostic except it’s where the Agnostic is Atheist-Lite and simply is of the opinion you can never know because nothing about the belief can be verified by anyone nor ever has been so it’s not a creed but more a methodology, many of them also sum it up very plainly that no deity or deities appear to be concerned about the fate of humans which would very strongly lean towards them not existing). I know for a fact that the main Abrahamic religions floating absurd skydaddy genie character doesn’t exist and is just the product of anonymous primitive worldview human minds inventing-writing things in the same general coterminous geographical areas in the Levant deserts and caves in the Bronze Age, and into the Iron Age of the very early Common Era, I don’t think for a second that all those anonymously written and contradictory-filled fictitious events, absurd characters and their weird abstract concepts and theologies are based in the real world, which will be better explained in the post with evidences. And I’m not technically an atheist because I simply don’t know, honestly I’ve never seen or talked to someone who came back from the dead or some other realm of existence or made Kool-Aid turn to apple juice or stopped the sun and moon in the sky, I’ve never seen or know anyone who’s seen or talked to a zombie with secrets from the beyond or…wherever. I’ve never heard or seen any of the contradictions speaking magical beings and magical superheroes that were all over the place in the stories and giving secret pointless news scoop tips and hints, have you?, or being able to do magical feats and various desert blood magic to really wow me to believe without a doubt with undeniable proof and evidence, heck if someone could do the things that they’re supposed to be able to do according to the supposed promises and magical powers, then I just might think they’re onto something and I might even go check it out. So you see, for scammers and charlatans to tell someone that they know without a doubt that what they’re saying/inventing is 100% absolute undeniably true and real is quite a ridiculous claim and utter hubris, (their “proof” and holy “evidence” being a few tattered and torn papyrus scraps with anonymously written contradictory theological ramblings stories to a few other fellow cultists somewhere but from many decades and even centuries after the alleged story was supposed to have taken place, some scraps being just a few words and no bigger than the size of a credit card, wow that’s pretty convincing valid 100% evidence actually…for a believe anything dufus perhaps), especially when you factor in all the related competing and contradictory abstract concepts and offshoot cults, sects and theologies from the same general sources and all of which were basically arguing with each other. As far as I’m concerned and even according to their very own written sources and narratives, all these Abrahamic religion’s main deities are more like pathetic confused bumbling absurd contradictory ball players on a field under the lights in a stadium on a spinning dirtball in frozen space in the backyard of the real landlord and powerful whatever, they’re puny personal butler skydaddy genies invented by even punier primitive minds who didn’t even know the world was round or what germs and illnesses were (i.e. – they were germs, bacterias, genetic abnormalities, diseases and corresponding sicknesses and ailments…not wandering demons, fiends from the heavens or requiring Bronze Age and Iron Age primitive desert blood magic theologies solutions as the one and only correct answer for the entire planet). Even among the many idiotic and nonsensical (and contradictory) actions and quotes attributed to the Jesus character in the gospels novels stories, one is in the Mark novel narrative where he is absolutely clueless about the spreading of germs, bacterias and viruses and the important yet simple concept of basic handwashing hygiene and washing utensils/cups as a positive preventative measure against them and being unclean, because instead he’s of the opinion that only words and things coming out of the mouth are unclean not things going into the mouth. Prognosis; clueless just like the talking snake thing, but in this case it’s even promoting the spreading of germs and diseases and ultimately innumerable innocent deaths, even 5 year olds know enough to wash their hands after the bathroom and playtime, so not a very bright or even a basic common sense character or author.
Yep, so I guess I could be categorized as an Agnostic-Atheist-Realist, or more precisely a Transtheist-Panentheist-Apatheist or Transtheist-Deist (i.e. – being beyond concepts of superstitious primitive theism and atheism categorizations which are just puny humanoid constructs) or something like that. All I do know is that even the term “religion” is a convoluted word and labyrinthian term having many meanings, and that it has been unequivocally shown and proven in many instances and in many ways that today’s major religions are purely man-made, ipso facto, all of them rising out of particular cultures during specific times and circumstances that the religion initially revolved around and was meant for, then as is proven to be common over time it mutated, changed, was added onto with religious and cultural syncretism from other religions/beliefs/myths and fables and then mutating some more etc. And so for a very long time and today, in no sense am I follower of Yahwehism-Jehovahism or any of the Abrahamic religions “faiths”, which makes me about as unbiased as someone can be, probably much more so than any of the present-day writers on the Abrahamic faiths topics. And so the word “religion” then has lost all meaning and relevance, whatever is really going on behind everything is just way, way, way, larger, more real and important than all these puny primitive mutating myths and in many cases absolutely absurd ridiculous man-made so-called “religions”.
(Which reminds me about all that “faith” business chatter, I mean c’mon let’s get real here, when there’s no evidence or proofs about something, something written by someone somewhere about someone at sometime or about something somewhere in some language or another, and especially when it’s contradictory nonsense that’s proven with evidence to be otherwise, the word “faith” then becomes meaningless, no amount of mental gymnastics will make non-real things into real. You might as well just truthfully replace it with the word “hope” because that’s what it really is, the person is just hoping something is real and true, otherwise any religion can do that, it’s just “Hope-ium”. e.g. – faith that the Noah’s Ark story is a real historical thing involving real historical people and events…that Joshua was a real historical person who really magically stopped the rotation of the earth for a full day (to make the sun and moon stay still in the sky overhead for extra daylight) so he could win on the battlefield. Heck I could start a religion tomorrow where we worship a head of cabbage deity, we could wear robes, have matching tin foil hats, sprinkle cabbage juice as holy anointings and chant in unison about how we all have unwavering faith in our religion and abstract theologies, we have faith that the planet Kepler-452b is made of cheese or inhabited by purple beings, what’s the difference?…none, it’s just hoping something is as you think or believe or want it to be. There even already are many religions today who likewise have absolute “faith” that their religion is the right way and some sort of eternal truth, (quite a number of them even blow themselves up for it), it’s really ridiculous how unfounded “belief” in something that is factually not proven or true is in reality just “hope” that it is. And boy do telescamvangelists milk that word for all its worth, it’s one of their favourite words and constantly used on television and their book titles especially…”faith seeds”…”faith seeds for the harvest”…if you have enough faith you can drink poisons, have anything you ask for, enough faith will result in all sorts of miracles, even be able to raise the dead and move mountains if you just have enough faith. It’s really all just “hoping” you can do various things and get various results, it’s just hoping what you believe is true, so the word faith is pointless in those instances and boring. I want to see first hand that faith at work and the promised floating mountains and zombies all over the place).
In the meantime though I’ll just occasionally add stuff here once in a while while trying to keep it fresh and entertaining but also factual and interesting, I probably may still have some posts included that are Croatian related, maybe about the archaeology and Croatian Pre-Christian pagan times and some other topics that I already did (including the Upper Paleolithic, Mesolithic and Bronze Age periods in Europe) as supplementary interesting background information about the same general theme and subject, maybe even repost some Croatian unexplained paranormal phenomena and ghosts posts that I did. I’m not a science nerd but perhaps even some science topics that are in the same general ballpark subject. This below repost although fairly long is only just the tip of the tip of the tip of the iceberg, so strap on your helmet and goggles because over time it should be a zany, wacky and interesting ride…
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Well, It’s a Sunday morning and readers on this side of the pond everyone knows what that means. I’m finding all the local botched drug deals, shooting and stabbing news kind of routine and boring too, (all their mugshots and social media selfies are really not all that great either), so I updated this post with some recent news and then added my own personal commentary, I reposted it already once before but now is as good a time as any for another one. Because brethren, as you know, this is verily the blog of truth. Oh sure it’s Croatia related in various ways, but it’s also the blog of truth. Some of the facts you may already know, some perhaps not, some facts may cause you to wonder in awe about a lot of things. You may wonder in awe or stare aghast in shock and disbelief at how these various hair styles, fashions, antics and charlatans are even allowed to be on television to spread their philosophies of filth and lies, or to even walk freely in public in the first place. (What if they hear voices telling them to do some really crazy stuff to people around them or next door or in the same room? what if their God tells them to kill people? To decapitate someone? What if God tells them to go kill a whole bunch of people and strangers like he’s already done lots of times, he might command it again. You can’t disobey God’s voice can you? That would be a sin, it’s unthinkable, it’s the law because it’s God’s word and you can’t argue with that). Either way it’s all extremely important information for the benefit of the reader. But mainly to help make sure you’re not worshipping the wrong gods or god or skydaddy, who just may be impersonating another god with the help of his earthly and spirit in disguise minions as well as subterfuge aliases and different names, so as to steal your mind, real history and even your real identity and make you only think you’re following the real gods instead of the fake thief god who will tell people to act irrational, perform desert voodoo rituals, believe rubbish nonsense, to go kill, and praise his kills and smiting slaughters, a god who uses different names and constantly contradicts himself many numerous times but says he doesn’t (but he does).
You see, the enemy is constantly trying to tempt you with empty and made up promises, ludicrous alternate universe fables and fake contradictory stories which are nothing but musings by obscurant obsessed lying miscreants and history inventors from long ago, (e.g. – not believing in the history of tectonic plates, sedimentary layers, natural world processes, geological evidences, Ice Ages, real cosmic laws and processes, continental drift or dinosaur fossil records etc, to instead believing in talking snakes and donkeys, that grass and plants existed before the sun and moon, that rain falls from rain jars, that leprosy is cured by sprinkling bird’s blood 7 times using another dead bird as the paintbrush, that the sun and moon can stay still in the sky for a full day and putting to death practically everybody who wouldn’t sacrifice as per etc or follow precisely every word of Levant deserts Bronze Age and Iron Age blood magic priests and worship their hodgepodge concocted contradictory desert tribal deity, who strangely got duped by a talking snake in his very own garden and numerous other contradictory hocus pocus failures and nonsense), all in the hopes of subversively stealing your mind, personality, identity and then replacing it with a confused and nonsensical mishmash of fantasy like a sly subversive Cymothoa Exigua attaching itself into your brain, telling you to believe folly and groundless absurdness and finally to try to get you to wish and pray to become a fool, i.e. – a modern day blithering automaton needing other worse fools to tell you that you don’t know how to read, think, use your eyeballs to see or ears to hear, to, in effect become a pathetic suspension of disbelief theologies believer and mindless minion follower.
You will have to say “no” to that foolish and nefarious subversive Cymothoa Exigua they want to implant in your mind to become your new mind if you truly want to be wise, set free and know the truths. You’ll have to pick it off from your mind and throw it to the abyss in the cosmos (….”Everlasting farewell Cymothoa Exigua! I pick you off from my mind and soul, I cast you into the frozen space of time where you will have to suck and feed on another flat earth, passing comet, asteroid, blood moon or space junk, you will have to attach your tentacles to the shadows of rocks in space and live there instead on your way to the black hole until you are no more. My mind and body is my own and will remain free and real and full of truth, the real world is my world not your obscurant imaginary concocted nonexistence reality and puny universe ruled by absurd blood magic fabulists, failed charlatan prophets, error-prone tribal deity genies, fiends from the heavens and puny bit part playing fiction actors in a desert cult script to be performed for galavanting sheepherders and other primitive robed bric-à-brac. For we know the Hyperboreans girded their loins and subdued the mountains and grassy plains and they tamed and hunted the wild beasts of the forests thousands of aeons before your universe and world was even concocted, Hyperborean babies suckled mother’s milk and sweet nectar and fresh honey made from Hyperborean bees legions of millennia before even one baby was put to the sword by Joshua and his loyal minions, Hyperborean gods made the winds and snows fall with just their mighty blowing nostrils not from opening doors to a floating crickety-crackety shed, lightning and fire was brought down as gifts by their fiery eyes for warmth and cooking meals and not to burn and kill loyal followers and enemies alike, verily the Hyperboreans charted the skies and cosmos to know the seasons and moon cycles and to know when the rivers rise ages before even one talking snake knew he existed or even one rain jar was tipped, they traversed the landscapes of the glacial epoch before your imaginary planet earth and universe was even made, thus now you gird your loins as an answer-excuse before your inevitable doom (thou may very well be the “God of the Middle East” yet that is but a puny hill of gnats to the Hyperboreans and their real world and universe mighty creator overlords who laugh at your failed blood magic spells buffoonery and false trickery schemes, with each failed spell and scheme being just another nail in your coffin until it also will become a home for gnats having great feasts, enjoy then your feast well gnats and rejoice), your fictitious pathetic carnival creation and employed desert devils, angels, madmen servants and hocus pocus blood magic sorcery has not served you well and they instead sealed your fate, how ironic?…or is it?…that the real reality existence and cosmos has from the beginning confounded your mind and no desert marionette-minions you ever conjured can save you now…for they bid you farewell also just as the feeding and feasting gnats do (your only hope then would be if some future “gnat king” or “king of the gnats” should try to surreptitiously restore you to your former place and throne of the desert, yet even he cannot raise what has already been eaten, “not even the eaten sheep and goats will be raised” the Hyperboreans steadfastly proclaim and thus it is so)…Oh nefarious Cymothoa Exigua phantasm of dross and lies”), something like that.
THE MIGHTY POWER OF PRETEND. Famous Canadian fake faith healer showman and temples shekels faith seed charlatan abomination Benny Hinn. ”I banish thee evil spirits with a wave of my manicured hand, (or jacket, proof below later), I banish you to Hades then later the land of the Canaanites and some other places.” (Look Benny! another shmuck in the 3rd row with their checkbook and pen out, the pew potatoes really enjoy our mumbo jumbo, the Lord he is truly great and swell!). Btw, most televangelists and 8 out of 10 of their lackey fans believe the bible was originally written in English and that the Jesus and all those other prophets superhero characters spoke in an Alabama-Texas drawl accent (aka “that ‘Ol Time Religion” whatever that means).
This isn’t really all that related to the Croatian stuff that I usually do, but since it’s Sunday and I have some free time, I’m going to quickly do this one that’s been a long time coming. (I really hate these actors and their acts, lines and phoney antics). Anyway, this is the kind of stuff that isn’t on televisions over there. Never. Usually on Sundays there it’s mostly some sports and other local entertainment shows or movies (probably surprising to many is that soccer is really not that popular in Croatia and hardly anyone actually even goes to the games, and that the ski slopes are better attended in non-spring and summer months, seriously most people don’t care about who might or might not kick the ball or where they might kick the ball or should have kicked the ball etc, it’s more about the sports betting or just something to have on television at the local bar, your interesting fact of the day). Even if you don’t have satellite and 500+ channels, you still get in some programming from other nearby countries usually from Italy, Hungary, Germany etc.
Just really think about this one, you really don’t even have to think hard to figure it out (It might even come with that famous pigeon on the bottle), I don’t know if it’s olive oil or canola oil so if its’s also good for salads and frying pork chops and scrambled eggs or not, if anyone has the inside news scoop on the hocus pocus oil let me know.
I should also add that over there there aren’t any of those midnight/early morning televangelist programs either, and absolutely none of those 24 hour televangelist related channels. (Unless of course it sneaks through on satellite somewhere). I’m not going to touch upon any of the other religious programming that takes place, to me these types below are the kings of the glitzy bacon dancin’ preachin’ carnival shows, the supremos of wacko-ism fake fraudsters deliriums and the late night Sunday god-o-tainment business. (I kid you not, I repeat there are absolutely no televangelists on television at any time, you could channel-surf all day and night to your heart’s content and not even come across one of these types of fake know-it-all lying fraudsters, actually not even any religions programming). I went with 12 highlight videos at first but then I started running into just so many of these fraudster scamvangelists and neurotically consumed and obsessed purveyors of fables and alternate universe abstract concepts videos on Youtube (and others related to the topic), although even some regular infomercials I could have easily thrown in here also.
Uh-Oh, popular apostle-witch John Hagee having yet another spurious neurotic delirium rapture mythomania episode and filth prophecies shtick perspiring moment about a puny addleminded and contradictory absurd Bronze Age blood magic desert tribal deity (aka the nefarious “God of the Middle East” , “The Serpent-Maker God”, “God of the Mesopotamian Garden” etc), which is weird because he’s based in Texas but thinks he’s teleported back 2,500 years ago in the Middle East, how weird is that?), a tribal deity that was largely imported from Mesopotamia, Canaanites and especially using the ancient Zoroastrian’s theologies…GLO-RY! (and he really likes pointing a lot for some theatrical reason, what’s up with that?, pointing here then over there then pointing over there and then pointing all over the place, he also has a weird fixation with blood, primitive Bronze Age and Iron Age deserts blood magic, washed in blood, swimming in blood, drinking and blood pouring all over the place like some sort of holy hocus pocus esoteric Middle Eastern butcher shop, and strangely predicting that people who don’t fall for his speeching scams are going to the egyptian eternal lake of fire hell (aka hell these days), what an abomination filth purveyor in a JCPenney suit pretending to be a preaching egyptian zoroastrian prophet guru), using his fabulist mental gymnastics he also strangely believe that America is really Israel full of Jewish people and that Jerusalem is the actual real capital of America yet he begs for dollars instead of shekels, which sure is strange the way I see it and probably heretical, I don’t know why but lots and lots of these types, including a number of the ones I’ll mention later, have some sort of weird abstract fixation psychosis about also believing that they’re really Jewish and so all descended from a fictional Abraham character who was a rich wandering traveling many camels and slaves owning Babylonian magus sorcerer guru from Ur of the Chaldeans/Mesopotamia (i.e. Iraq), if that’s not obsessive alternate universe delusions then I don’t know what is, (he, and many befuddled minions like him, believe jesus was god…but also the new adam…but he’s also god…but still nevertheless he’s adam…but also god…he’s god and adam..he’s adam and god..???..but where’s the new eve?…clearly textbook cases of delusional and schizotypal personality disorder just like many of the magical thinking biblical characters actually, who likewise thought they were special and getting secret esoteric cryptic messages and ideas planted into their brains from outer space) because then I’m descended from a Bronze Age Japanese super duper Ninja Samurai Wizard guy (ouuuu, he looks intense and upset, because his delusional dark gospels filth blood moon prophecies psychosis and holy secret gematria numerology hocus pocus calculations failed yet again so now he may be turned into a bloody pumpkin pie and crucified as god’s punishment which will surely complicate further DVDs and book writings for the holy tax-free temple coffers). He also is one of those delusional types who are big fans of and think they know the book of Revelation, (and strangely a book used as a plot or theme for even a number of Hollywood movies for some weird reason, a preposterous “book” full of swords, flowing blood galore, monsters, dragons and absurd multiheaded creatures, chariots, horses, sulfur, fire pits and lakes of fire, smoke, trumpets and singing and winepresses for bodies and much more very weird stuff and just about everything a sick diseased mind needs, and especially that every cult leader craves…to invent all sorts of dreamscapes and ideas and just about anything they want to then apply their own personal meanings and delusions).
Unfortunately, even just the case of the delusional psychotic paranoid schizophrenic fabulist John Hagee seen above, and similar fantasy purveyor gurus out there they are not just isolated cases by far, (who since has passed on the temple keys and reigns of his own personal blood magic fantasyland death cult empire organization and some of the temple coffers to his son…surprise surprise, not really though that’s the way the scamvangelist biz operates), as there are a plethora of other similar charlatan purveyors of filth and alternate universe bizarre beliefs and wrong prophecy-predicting schemes and magical predictor powers (which btw according to the “good book” and his god’s very own commanded laws is deserving of death, all these types seem to always forget that or accidentally skip it when reading for some reason, each and every time too so that sure is weird).
WOW it’s the god’s apostle-witch prophet on earth, LOL. Even after getting the delusional secret esoteric cryptic messages planted into his brain from outer space that transformed him into yet another in a long list of OT Texas failed prophets, he’s still waiting for promised locusts who sting like scorpions, multi-headed horned beasts and dragons to come out of the sea and a space alien horseback invasion…and for lots and lots of sacrifices and bowls for some reason, these delusional fabulist cultists types still don’t get it and refuse to accept the real world reality because they refuse to admit that their superheroes and their primitive Bronze Age God’s failed predictions and promises in some ancient novels were just plain failures time after time, no amount of mentally teleporting to thousands of years ago making things up and selectively cherry picking fables and ramblings to invent other and even opposite meanings of what is written, will ever change the real reality results and real universe existence, it’s just self-deception and brainwashing yourself (and others) to make your imaginary universe in your own mind take precedence over reality (it’s just plain creepy and dumb that in the 21st century someone is being so obsessively neurotically fixated on bowls, giant sea beasts, locust attacks and dragons of all things, either that or dang that is some fucked up homemade drugs and strange brew hooch that’s for sure).
As the reader will become much better informed by the end of this post, they will know that the speeches and sermons (and their many books and DVDs also of course) of these types are really only blatant mentally imbalanced personally invented filth jimble jamble ramblings of sick, neurotic and deranged people. Preachers, (so-called preachers, pastors and self-styled apostles and witnesses anyway whatever that means) who are completely fixated consumed (possessed, probably by their very own conjured demons in their minds) with their made up fabricated abstract concepts and fake histories, obsessed with their Bronze Age and Iron Age desert blood magic sorceries fictions fables and ancient deserts religions astrotheologies, with floating fiends from the heavens and their primitive Levant death cult alternate universes, blood magic cult magicians and associated hocus pocus, daily incantations worship fixation of a hodgepodge concocted tribal deity phantasm largely borrowed and adapted from the older ancient Mesopotamian, Sumerian, Zoroastrian, Canaanite, Egyptian and other Levant deserts religions, anthropomorphic bizarre hybrid beast-creatures and imaginary human-creatures hybrids “visions” and alien space beings, zombifications, phantasms and ghosts, universe melting and skull-crushing failed apocalypses and prophecies (so many failed prophecies and apocalypses with even opposite results happening which explains why other wrong predictions keep needing to be invented, and they sell lots of books and DVDs too which is good news for their temple’s coffers), and again more primitive blood magic, hocus pocus and genocidal killings fixations, that they think that their’s is the actual real world and real cosmos existence.
Actually it’s obsessive obscurant filth ramblings that is so primitive, so filled with absurdity, proven errors, contradictions and statements proven wrong in so many cases that they actually should be wearing old stinky dilapidated robes, sandals and have grimy long beards, rotten teeth, sand in their ears and nostrils and traveling on camels to their carnival filth parade temple shows just like they did back during those ancient deserts blood magic hocus pocus times. You’ll see that they take a snippet of an anonymously written verse here, part of another one there, throw in a few words and symbologies from a failed prophecy or two or three and throw in some personally conjured up misinformation and fiction, mistranslate what’s written in the text, distort, falsify, redact, omit and/or change information and known factual reality, twist meanings and invent new alternate meanings and abstract concepts to further mesmerize the ignorant, feeble-minded and nodding-applauding gullible pew potatoes to agree, clap, buy books and even send more faith shekels seeds to further the diabolical work of the particular charlatan purveyor of filth desert blood magic sorceries and his primitive personal death cult organization and their misinformation propaganda gospels. It really makes you wonder how these types are even allowed to be on television and hold gatherings in public in the first place, or allowed to even exist to spread worship of their Abrahamic heavenly fiends and alternate delusional universes, and stranger still even hobnob with presidents, politicians and getting into the voters and politics biz (since when did Bronze/Iron Age Mesopotamian, Zoroastrian, Canaanite, Egyptian and their borrowed and adapted pagan Levant religions abstract concepts, hocus pocus stories, primitive blood sorcery tribal deities and erroneous cosmic and world views become something that must be emulated and worshipped in the 20th-21st century? and absurdly that even the entire planet must also worship and follow the same fabricated degenerate desert blood magic filth theologies, all towards some future imaginary demented tribal Yahwehism-Jehovahism deity theocratic dictatorship kingdom ruled by floating priests and imaginary OT failed superhero prophets over freshly made zombies? pfff as if, more about that later).
It seems the whole time that despicable televangelists do their contradictions and fiction nonsense jimble jamble shtick for faith shekels seeds they think they’re doing the world a favour by making things up all over the place, suited mental patients experiencing regular psychosis episodes on stages and behind microphones neurotically consumed (possessed) with spreading their own personal invented and con-cocted brand of Yahwehism-Jehovahism fixation deliriums universe to wow the feeble-minded, hocus pocus purveyors of their dark gospels. In this case just preaching the diary of a madman and babbling at the moon made-up mumbo-jumbo garbage, as well as filling peoples and children’s heads with all sorts of his fabulist mental gymnastics, demented abstract concepts doctrine-philosophies, absurd imagery, fables and other vile con-cocted filth not based in reality or the real world. You don’t scare or fool me Mr. Fake-Wizard of Oz Liar, I’ve never seen any hybrid multi-headed multi-bodied winged, horned and crowned beasts out of any sea (unless you count those huge tunas some people catch on their boats, sometimes just one of those tuna could easily feed a family for a year easily), people squished in a winepress and blood for 200 miles reaching up to the horses bridles (200 miles of blood up to the horses bridles people wake up! Put your horses on the roof and get your rubber boots while you still can for cripe’s pete’s sake!!!) or hordes of locusts with stinging scorpion’s tails and speaking with voices like thunder and dragons. Make the bear, lion, rock, sea or bird into an angel, or into a demon, into God or into the Devil, make a fish into a Jesus or a Jesus into a faceless swordmouth or a horned creature into a fish and then into a beast with wings and multiple different heads and many other things in the cosmos into anything you want, don’t forget to throw in a bunch of scrolls, lots and lots of blood, altars and sacrifices and of course trumpets all over the place (there always has to be lots of trumpets of course for the zany suspense mood). For preaching bullshit fraudsters with net worths from 10’s of millions to over 300 million dollars personal net worth and expecting a rapture any day, they sure do write lots of books, Praizzze Gawd! (Strangely many televangelists are so obsessively consumed with all sorts of absurd contradictory fables and hogwash desert civilizations theologies from storytelling Bronze Age sheepherders that they even think they’re Jewish for a bunch of weird and pointlessly lame reasons and even that Hebrew superheroes characters are Christians on the same team because Jonah was in a fish for three days and other absurdities, (Muslims believe that too I should add, because they insist all those old testament superheroes are actually Islamic superheroes, more about these topics later), their cultic contradictory fables, deliberate obscurantism chicanery and obsessive biblical deserts Yahwehism-Jehovahism universe deliriums really know no bounds).
Because the reader should keep in mind, that right from the start the ancient and later various Abrahamic religions, like telescamvangelists today, has been a smart hustle that made a good living for a lot of charlatans and many, many lazy bums. There was no welfare in ancient times, so if you did not own land then you were the slave of those who did. But if you were a soothsayer, a new religious guru or proselytizer and carried around “Secret Books”, “Secret Scrolls” or “Secrete Knowledge”, then you could start up a pretty good hustle. The Nobility were often very superstitious, and often consulted so-called “Holy Men” on matters of state, and war, how best to give yourself clout and prestige and even authority than by inventing and making up glorious past histories, past characters, past events (and predicting futures also of course) and eventually lots more invented stuff and lies as the means to the end.
In a way, this is sort of a humanitarian post when you really think about, actually it’s a post about fundamental basic human rights, the right to be protected from any Cymothoa Exigua, the right to not be exposed to or influenced by or forced or coerced or tricked into believing any concocted thinking patterns and behaviorisms that are not my own free thoughts, the right to free will and use common sense reality in my real personal world in the real universe, not some other person’s or group’s agendas, propaganda and mental gymnastics fake universe rigmarole (the same goes for my basic human right in not having to mindlessly follow, believe, support or be a servant to any particular political movements, fabricated so-called societal norms agendas propaganda (or odious trendy abnorms), or various media and television fads and concoctions), and I’m warning people about the tentacles that are outstretched and ready to snatch them and force them to sing gibberish then hop and dance like drunken frogs on speed, maybe even wear strange clothing and other bullshit garbage, it’s much, much worse than any Shopping Channel fashion jewelry and moisturizing cream chit-chat. So if the reader is from Croatia, here is just a small sample of the kind of stuff you miss out on. Even if you don’t understand a word of English, I don’t think it will really matter.
(I decided to come back and update this addition after originally posting it. I got to thinking how this topic reminds me of Mormons and Jehovah’s Witnesses and those similar types. Readers over here will probably know what I mean. Even the last time I was in Croatia I noticed a few Mormons in Zagreb and in Rijeka who came over from Utah, which really made me laugh, not laugh as in funny but just really pathetic and absurd. (Elders Todd and Glen I think were the ones in Rijeka and Elders Burtis and Daben in Zagreb). It’s remarkable, I was there on vacation to not even think about those types and here they sneak in trying to brainwash the people trying to enjoy their lunch at the table next to me. Going around just like here to tell the people who just came out of the downtown ice cream shop whether they know that bla bla bla and this and that. That’s because when you really think about it, it’s frikin ridiculous and absurd. There we have a case of 2 recently out of high school types who just finished some kind of 6 week indoctrination bootcamp or whatever, and then all of sudden they ship off to even foreign countries to do some kind of mission…their abstract concepts fictions shtick and book of magical stories stand up act.
Were Velociraptors “raptured”? The bible characters never mentioned it, but then again there’s no reason not to believe it because why would they have roamed and ruled the earth for millions of years if they weren’t meant to be eventually raptured? (Velociraptors lived about 75 million years ago, and did you know that a “raptor” is a bird today, yep, pigeons, gulls, turkeys and KFC chicken is actually a bucket of raptors, amazing).
You see, there you have instances of where the newly pep talked to and freshly indoctrinated individuals (with their new shirts, ties and fresh polished loafers) are then sent off to save, witness, preach, enlighten…whatever, to even people in other countries. They are now off with their backpack and name tag to explain the mysteries of the universe to people even in other countries, to people who speak other languages and who drink cappuccinos and who always drink those imported beers and wines. (that last part was a joke, get it)…Only the good places and neighbourhoods though you’ll notice, even around here it’s only areas with freshly cut lawns, lawn ornaments and Ikea furniture, they don’t even think about going in their suit and ties to the drug and crime filled parts of town with the candy eaters, glue-sniffers and cologne drinkers, drug rehab centers, shootings, stabbings, and bingo halls etc, you know…places that supposedly need their guidance, expertise and knowledge etc.
Always with the miracle water kit, oil, holy trinkets bric-à-brac, dirt from somewhere and DVDs and books, what is your major malfunction miracle-boy? Only feeble-minded minions would fall for this fake invented jimble jamble spurious garbage and send this stooge money.
Think about it, so it’s off to the nicer locations and far off more or less normal countries to let people in on the mysteries of the universe, the meaning of life, the mind of god, the truths since the days of the dinosaurs, Mormon underwear sizing, how to pronounce correctly really long made up names of made up superheroes from the book of Mormon, etc. Isn’t that strange, weird and absurd? (The book of Mormon is actually just nothing but really, really, really, really boring voodoo witchcraft btw, technically it’s just an egregious emulation of black magic or most likely just some kind of Utah voodoo). So off they go freshly scrubbed and brainwashed to foreign countries and lollygagging around their ice-cream parlours, bakeries, museums, restaurants, art galleries, promenades and the model-filled walkways of Zagreb, Rijeka, Vienna, Munich, Paris, Oslo, Prague, Warsaw, Rome etc (aka those foreign carcass megatropolises who need the holy ghost anointing and lots of pamphlets)…off to teach those people their filth and the mysteries of the magics and the mind of God, telling the people their reason for existing, to even tell people about the history and even the future of the universe and all this before they are even old enough to drink a beer at the local shitty and grubby bar in their hometown (besides, there’s already lots of churches there, plenty of churches and church ruins all over the place, some of them are over a thousand years old and some even centuries older, heck practically every country in Europe has tons of churches all over the place, nobody is prohibited or being told they can’t go, if you want a church by all means there’s a church there, there and over there enjoy yourself if you must, and besides plenty of people check them out who aren’t even religious anyway because of the art and architecture and history involved just like looking at old Greek and Roman buildings and ruins these days, so there’s really absolutely no need for foreign churchy types or cults and sectarian gurus and minions trying to set up shop from across the ocean, those churches have been around way, way longer before even cable television and starving faith shekels seeds scamvangelists were invented). How about that? That’s pretty bizarre if you ask me, and actually sort of a contradictory hubris.
A measly 1000 bucks will get you into heaven or me a new gazebo and golf clubs (Always with the endless seeds, sowing and harvest shtick, shouldn’t they be farmers or just be doing Farm-Aid instead? it makes much more sense.
The proper way to sow seeds for an actual harvest, it’s really not that complicated or even involve addressed envelopes and pens or hocus pocus, plus you get actual real yummy fruits and vegetables instead of lying shitbags abstract concepts drivel which is a really good deal, and makes better stews and pies too. Example: sowing seeds for a harvest.
You see, because scientists, historians, geniuses, archaeologists, paleontologists, astrophysicists and philosophers also, hundreds of thousands of them and probably many more, since from time immemorial and up to today have been searching for proofs and clues about the meaning and functioning of the cosmos, about the galaxies, planets, stars and black holes, about real life and the natural world around etc (and about how the miracle sand, cloths and water works also probably). But ohhhhh, instead now this guy with the backpack and name tag was perhaps struggling with grade 10 geography in high school not that long ago, (maybe he wasn’t even sure where those cities I mentioned earlier were located on a map), Ohhhh, now all of a sudden after mission boot camp he has the answers to your and everyone else’s eternity and understands the mysteries of the universe because he has a new clean shirt, a name tag and some free pamphlets to give you, some even have slogans and cartoons. Forget about those scientists, historians etc that I mentioned about earlier. Now they’re doing you a favour and letting you in on their truth because otherwise you’re lost, ignorant and no better than the philistine favela and bush people and their ways, how’s that for bizarro-world? As for the Jehovah’s Witnesses and some other organizations, they’re almost the same except they have different name tags, go to different buildings and they get their haircuts on Wednesdays instead of Fridays. The worst of them are the ones that are the most popular and on television, they make up stories and weird abstract concept dogmas to the extreme and literally prey on desperate and ignorant people giving them false hope of miracle cures and often incurable diseases, as well as that all their dreams will come true and maybe even win the lottery, if they have enough faith of course. (They’re competition in that department also don’t forget, each one of them is trying to get a piece of the lucrative faith pie, which will most importantly get them more members and envelopes mailed in).
God told me his shocking ancient secret mumbo jumbo, now you have to pay to find out what it is. Click the link below and don’t forget he takes credit card, cash, frequent flyer miles and food stamps also. Praizzze Gawd get ready for an amazing ancient secret money miracle, free shipping and handling! (btw if there’s any readers in the CHCH broadcasting area feel free to call them to keep this and other similar invented jimble jamble lying charlatan tax-free scamvangelists actors off the programming schedule, people can just start up their very own invented verbal diarrhea tax-free blood magic hocus pocus shekels seeds donations scam, it’s really easy people have already been doing it for thousands of years, and if not for yourself at least for your children we need to keep the poisonous tentacles of this delusional mind control garbage off the air…or perhaps that’s the intent from the start?..for kids at home to break their shekels piggy bank that they were going to use to buy a comic book or send to the sick kids but instead to send off faith seeds to the company scam temples of these societal degenerates purveyors of televised filth sewage, that’s just disgusting).
Basically, it’s like this. These types are just actors. Very bad actors at that, yet very good actors also, depending on who’s their audience even the lousiest actor can be a gifted blessed miracle man preacher. Lots of these types will also get into the “author” biz. Oh yeah, actually these days hardly any of them aren’t “authors.” You see, it’s quite easy being an author in this racket, it’s just more or less the same stuff you see on stage. You don’t even have to know what you’re talking about, the people in the seats lap it up like a dog lapping up water on a hot day. It’s a simple math and equation being an “author” such as them. Just pick a sentence in the bible, any sentence, any sentence at all…
…Now just make sure the sentence includes at least the word…”miracle”…or “miraculous”…or “reap”…”God”….”love” (don’t pick the word “hate” though, that word is in there a lot and god and the other superheroes prophets and characters are hating all over the place constantly, if they’re not smiting, killing, destroying or sacrificing one thing or another they’re usually hating, prophesying disasters and slaughters because of god’s hate and complaining lamenting most of the time), along with torture, burning, destroy, slay, kill, plague, stone, sores, blind, lepers etc, but they’re not good words for “authors”, “publishers” and of course for “banks”)…”sow”…”tenfold”…”hundredfold”…”golden lamps”…”bowls”……some other good ones are “scripture”…”heavens”…”heavenly”…”temple”…”tithes”…”truth”…”truthfully” and/or a few others, you probably will want to throw in the word “unequivocally” now and then also for emphasis to show that you really know what you’re talking about (…”And I unequivocally say again that…”…”The bible unequivocally demands that you…”…”The holy ghost is unequivocally clear about such and such…” etc, etc).
Then all you have to do is throw in that one word you picked and the chapter/verse where you found it, then just wing it like on the stage, concoct all kinds of stories, futures, pasts, events, things that never happened, all kinds of bizarre scenarios and situations, pour on the abstract concepts, amazing promises and prophecies etc, and then just throw into your book the above words once in a while and it’s technically biblical, the word of God and the truth. (enter trumpets and epic music). Make up some weird absurd meaningless pointless book title and you’re good to go, you’ll sell tons of books (Look at just how f***ing easy it is, there verily are an eternal ocean of morons ready to buy and believe anything once they get into their “Ol’ Time Religion” delirium (whatever that means), just one example, the hair is optional thankfully). That just about sums it up. You see, the vast majority of time that these types talk or write, it’s just all made up. You can transform things into whatever you wish, anything at all. Make the bear, lion, rock, sea or bird into an angel, or into a demon, into God or into the Devil or into both at the same time, make fantastical absurd beast creatures and things in the cosmos into anything you want. whatever suits your purpose and book plot. It doesn’t even have to make sense, it can even defy the laws of the universe and reality but the most important thing is that you remind people the chapter and verse of one of the words up above that you slipped in, I mean that you used. It’s that simple. Knowing the chapter and verse of the word you used is all that really matters because the rest is just personal jimble jamble filler.
It’s strange that the “Biblical God” character totally approved of and even commands murdering, genocides, cannibalism, slavery and “Biblical Jesus” said “Slaves, obey your earthly masters”, but eating pork, lobster and shrimp is wrong and a sin (Mmmmm…pork chops and garlic butter pan-fried shrimp is all I have to say). Many scholars have noted that Dystheism (the belief that a god is not wholly good and is possibly evil) has existed for many thousands of years, as shown by trickster gods found in polytheistic belief systems and by the view of other representations of supreme beings (especially portrayed in the Abrahamic religions, particularly the Old Testament), and with the biblical old testament tribal deity Yahweh-Jehovah clearly showing attributes and vestiges of the earlier polytheistic trickster gods, where god decides to become malevolent and unreasonable to satisfy it’s own whims and personal satisfaction…committing murders, genocides, blood hungry, plagues, disasters, diseases against his loyal followers and enemies alike, as well as demanding the following of primitive and contradictory laws, traditions and orders.
Heck, you don’t even have to know anything about the bible at all, literally zilch, zero and nothing, just know the chapter and verse of the word you used, the rest is easy. Actually, I think most of these types definitely should be spending more time “reading” books and sourced material/documents/historical writings in different languages and sources as well as scientific data, the last thing they should be doing is actually “writing” a book because books have to be based on and about factual things when it comes to writing about facts, you can’t just make up facts as you write along. Heck, when writing anything at all, even comic books, lots of irreligious types also like to make a fish into a Jesus, or a horned creature into a fish and then into a person, make pigeons into ghosts, make an adjective into a noun, even make the Moon, stars or planets into God and the Devil at the same time because it makes for zany drama and suspense. I rest my case, you see it’s just all the same entertainment/god-o-tainment book writing biz).
Despicable abominations filth shitbags Joel Olsteen and Creflo Dollar are just 2 of the plethora of well known spurious televangelists getting into all sorts of scandals, their main shtick is babbling in nonsensical fake languages, fake miracles and making up all sorts of personal abstract concepts and ideas that have absolutely nothing to do with the real world or reality.
On top of that, after a while you don’t even have to mention the bible or any quotes at all. That’s when you can just start writing and talking about the whole “it’s a special relationship” thing. Now it’s all just about some imaginary special personal relationship between just you and Jesus, or God, or some saint or the Holy Ghost or whatever. Everybody can have some kind of personal relationship and getting special messages from outer space into their mind. At this point you can just write about how it was the Lord who spoke to your heart, about how Jesus said this to you or God told you that such and such. Pfff, you don’t even need any bible now at all actually. You see, the creator of the universe has decided to have a personal relationship with you, just you, and talk to you personally, you are a real somebody now and special, somebody really something that the being(s) behind everything that exists in the universe talks to you personally, picking you over everyone else in the world while you were doing your laundry or chopping onions. Wow, you are blessed that the being(s) has taken such an interest in you and your problems over everyone and everything else going on in the spinning dirt ball in space. “Oh, and Jesus told me that….” or “Glory be, the Lord filled my heart with his words and told me that such and such….” “God let it be known to me, so that I knew what path to take for his glory, he filled me with his truth” or ‘Amen, the spirit filled me and spoke to me, telling me God’s great plan and Jesus’ wishes”, maybe even what kind of shampoo to buy, how much to give to brother Popoff, where you lost your library card… Wow, How about that?, now you can just speak with them personally through figments of your delusional imagination and dreams and secret news scoop hunches so you don’t really need any scriptures, scrolls, real history knowledge or facts, bibles, books or even any written sources.
You don’t even have to own or read or know anything about any books at all actually, now just “the Lord” and master of the universe himself will tell you personally because you’re special and a real important somebody now with real important stuff to do that’s important to the world and him, he’ll send angels to guide you and give you feelings and hunches and opinions so you can spread stories to save the world, sell books and so you don’t screw up the map driving directions and be late when going to the carnival or theatre.
(Whatever you do though, do NOT talk to God about or mention in your new book anything about ancient civilizations, about archaeology, especially about dinosaurs and dinosaur fossils, Neanderthals and the Eurasian Cro-Magnon populations, about archaic extinct humanoid species populations, no talking or writing about snake vocal chords, just only write about what happened after Adam & Eve and that’s it). So it seems now you can talk with God(s) or others while taking a shower or cooking dinner because now you have a “personal relationship” and they will tell you secrets and all kinds of things, delusional voices and imagined feelings will show you the way and give you lots of stuff to write books about, so many stories to be told because now you’re really a special somebody and suddenly know lots of things that others need to know. Maybe even while brushing your teeth or when you’re on the toilet you will be filled with amazing heavenly sent personal information and secrets, voices spoken directly to you personally in your mind and implanted in your brain from…whoever. Wow that’s really something, you should write probably lots of books now).
It’s very easy starting your own religion these days since the advent of the idiot box, with even approving and clapping herds of lackeys and feeble-minded minions supporting you and your new spurious imaginary invented religion, such as another bs and nonsense rubbish lip-flapping despicable filth specimenscamvangelist seen above…[enter 6 Million Dollar Man theme sound effects]…Joyce “20 million dollar home” Meyer, the spiritual Pamela Voorhees of televangelists. What does this absurd disturbing chicanery even mean exactly? Is this a proper way to be walking around the mall and airport showing off your new shoes while eating oversized cookies where even children would be forced to witness the ghoulish nightmarish abomination spectacle? (as if the cookie is some sort of absurd trophy or holy talisman connecting her to the most wisest mind of the universe to write books), talk about overcompensating for her cookie and shoes delirium especially after her botched plastic surgery, she even supposedly gets marriage and relationships counseling inside scoops and tips from god himself, lol, God the relationships therapist and sex counselor with dildo news scoop tips even way better than Dr. Ruth, I recommend her best-selling classics “How To Hear From God” because it’s probably full of zany adventure and suspense (Did you hear that? You and everyone can listen to secret news scoop tips from the god personally like a personal butler or cosmic genie so there’s actually no need for Joyce Meyer, you can get secret godly news scoops and tips directly no need for a middle humanoid), and of course “Living Beyond Your Feelings” and “Power Thoughts to Win the Battle of the Mind” because seriously who doesn’t want to win the war against your feelings and your mind? Your feelings and your mind must be defeated by fiction mumbo jumbo and that’s the truth, you’d be crazy not to). And her “Second Coming products” such as the Jesus Dildo will ensure that dildoing is done the right and scripturally correct holy way and not like the Jews, Jehovah’s Witnesses, Mormons, Baháʼí, Muslims and others (in some telescamvangelist circles aka the “Immaculate Erection”, however that seems very unlikely and absurd being that the Jesus and disciples characters in the fiction fables were usually just talking pointless contradictory nonsense stories in the desert with their heads in the clouds while making zombies and exorcising demons most of the time so they probably couldn’t even get an erection which is a sin anyway deserving to be chopped off). Besides let’s get real in the actual real non-televangelist world, people instead want and deserve zany adventure books to know how Abraham a rich wandering travelling many camels and slaves owning Babylonian magus sorcerer guru from Ur of the Chaldeans/Mesopotamia could possibly be the founding father of Christians, Jews, Mormons, Jehovah’s Witnesses, Baha’i and Muslims as claimed? and be the great great great great great etc grandfather of the Jesus character?, because that’s quite a problematic contradictory conundrum and actually very absurd, real thinking people deserve better than that to ponder with their giant cookie and new shoes. Look at just how easy it is….Brand new books out next month order yours today…”Let God Be Your Interior Decorator”, “Jesus Filled Our Shopping Cart With Anointed Blessings From Zion”, “Lighten Up, The Holy Ghost Is 25% Off And Free Shipping”, “The Lord Is King And The Only Banker And Plastic Surgeon Your Soul Will Ever Need”…”The Lord Makes The Best Cookies Because The Holy Ghost Is The Baker” …then you just build on the book title with all sorts of invented horseshit and pointless fluff and it’s a bestseller guaranteed, commercials and everything. (see also Books and Letters written by Jesus who’s also probably the best author of all time).
These types really make me laugh when they start preaching and feeling on their soapboxes, or from behind their desks and microphones. Feelings this, spoke to me that, babbling on quoting pointless meaningless words and chapter/verse quotes that even they don’t know who wrote it or what they mean, just moving on to chattering about their views and feelings and fantasyland now, just rambling on like it’s some sort of information that’s really important and that your life/eternity depends on it, (putting the bait on the hook before reeling you in to your doom, unless of course you become their brainless lackey stooge, very sly tricky bunch). Heck, explain your views and feelings now about cilantro vis-a-vis parsley, or how the Lord or Holy Ghost (whatever that means) spoke to your heart and mind that people should use clarifying shampoo once a week to get rid of buildup and have more softer and luxurious hair etc, write a chapter about how such and such a chapter/verse shows that we really should think this way and not that way about whatever. It all amounts to invented personal pretend world pointless personal feelings chatter that makes me wish they really were talking about cilantro vis-a-vis parsley or shampoo ratings.
Joyce Meyer – a genuine irrefutable apostle-witch and result of 2,000 years of mutations and today undeniable and unequivocal proof that the biblical god does not exist (and from the looks of it she’s most probably the Revelation’s Great Necromantic Blood Magic Zombie Whore Queen of Babylon riding the Seven-Headed and Ten-Horned Beast clothed in purple, and you do have to admit she sure as gosh darn diddly darn dang ding dong doodly darned likes her purple outfits that’s for sure, it’s the prophetic sign fulfilled so keep your eyes open out there in Missouri).
From there you get to different variations, different denominations and then eventually even cults, sects and other strange so-called “churches” or just religious groups. That’s where you throw in some UFO-angels stories, reptilian shapeshifting world leaders abducting Bigfoots from Atlantis and hiding them in the pyramids and at Olmec tombs and some other things. There you have a case of just adding even more made up stuff and choosing different words as your sentence/chapter-verse source. One thing you’ll notice however, like I said earlier, most of these types ignore scientific facts and evidences staring at them right in the face practically, facts and reality are not a part of their feelings-fables equation and never has been. Even numerous experienced “Bible scholars”, professors and people who study these things their whole life, they readily admit with evidences from the text source material and archaeological evidences that most of the most well known biblical stories are just plain personal tribal theologies agendas and propaganda of anonymous Bronze Age tribal writers, primitive blood magic mysticism behaviorisms, allegories, borrowed and adapted astrotheologies, abstract concepts and basically mostly fiction superheroes and magical events. Basically a case of either outright inventions (Adam & Eve, talking serpents, Noah and his closed boat door and animals, the man living in a fish without drowning, the Devil tricking God into tormenting Job with plagues and sores and killing his family all just for a bet or some kind of demented bragging rights or something, or to teach you a lesson that you better do this and that or else) or extravagant and ludicrously improbable exaggerations written down many centuries after the event or person in the story was supposed to have happened and existed. Written down hyperbole with some fantastical “miracles magic” and events thrown into the story to really “wow” and “gosh” the readers and listeners. Hey, let’s make the sun and moon stop moving, or let’s make cereal fall from the sky, heck turn people into salt and let’s have lots of plagues and whining lepers and zombies. (You will also come across tons of examples of Epimenides paradox , coincidentally in Croatian we have the saying “Ti si kreten i majmun drek i bezveze” when someone doesn’t know what the hell they’re talking about or are just bullshitting to audiences and being pointless). Every preacher and book writer just follows their own personal brand of Confirmation bias anyway, just selectively using flaky imaginary characters or cherry picking wishy-washy obscure anonymously written text to prove their pointless made up personal views with abstract concepts and then ignoring the mountain of contradictory text and meanings and evidence at the same time, just spinning the fables excerpts into hard or paperback personal fable version books. Of course for the Jonah in a fish for 3 days story you won’t need any suspension of disbelief at all, because that’s quite possible and probable. (aka the “gospel truth” and being so true that it’s “super true”).
I don’t have enough space here to elaborate about this disturbing abomination, Ernest Angley (the one with the gigantic matching purple snotrag in his front pocket) is basically known as the weird talking toupeed fake-healer and bullshitting guru-host of fake miracles television shows for many decades, he’s even come back from the dead a number of times not just once. Praizzze Gawd!
It’s basically that well known recently coined term “Suspension of Disbelief” actually, it’s the exact same process except these days it’s Hollywood, European and other movie film writers, directors and producers that employ this method, for thousands of years before the magics of filmmaking they only just wrote the suspension of disbeliefs on the back of the skins of dead carcasses, then later something resembling paper. (The psychosis sometimes reaches such an obsessive fixated level that some people will believe there is no suspension of disbelief at all, that instead everything written is truth and real and even super real, that a mountain is a river, even that God made your child blind, cripple or have an incurable disease because you wronged him somehow in the past, or just to teach you a lesson). That’s why there’s no archaeological evidence or historical written sources backing up what was written later.
(The Abrahamic religions adopted Zoroastrian Devil fictional character shown for illustrative purposes only, not an actual photo) Ironically, according to the bible Lucifer is described (actually intentionally mistranslated and taken completely out of context because the text is actually referring to someone else, but anyway) as a highly exalted perfect freedom fighting angel leader who’s beauty is flawless and breathtaking (what the heck happened too much Butylated Hydroxyanisole and Sodium Nitrate in his diet and he had horns implants?), although even this portrayal from Isaiah 14: 4-21 derives mainly from Babylonian astrotheology about the planet Venus (Lucifer is the Latin name for Venus) and the text is actually speaking about the King of Babylon and so it’s mistranslated, cherry picked and taken completely out of context (i.e. – made up and fabricated, makes for great movies though). More about this much later invented (and borrowed from other older and Mesopotamian/Zoroastrian religions) character who actually started out as a personality trait of Yahweh-Jehovah God and his palaroonie friend helper, then turned into an angel agent who personally works for and carries out punishments and suffering “for” God with his full support, then as a position of authority to be an accuser and adversary, later he becomes a metaphor and symbolic representation of innate human qualities, and only much later still he is transformed into a powerful separate entity with a powerful kingdom and armies of his own angels who took his side (because the greatest minds and thinkers in history are always in the minority not the majority as the saying goes), having his own vast realms and even authority as Lord of the Earth and visible world who is at times a helper to humans (eventually given horns, cloven hooves feet, pointy tail, red face, knobby knees, pointy chin and ears, goatee, bad breath, pitchfork, echoing laugh and sometimes even a nefarious cape etc). Very interesting also, even the very concept of “dualism” between a mighty Devil and God characters being in eternal conflict, of wandering demons floating around the earth as well as even the whole concept of an eternal burning hell punishments and burning punishments for eternity with the fire and the burning hellish burning torment fire and the Lake of Fire of eternal burning and hot anguish burning until almost burnt etc, all these ideas and concepts (as well as the attached astrotheology and future rising zombies beliefs) were only much later introduced and directly borrowed and imported by Jewish scribes and priests from other surrounding religions and especially from the Egyptians and Persian Zoroastrianism religion and their beliefs, (even the customs of circumcision and being forbidden to eat pork has much earlier tradition origins from them also, particularly because the Egyptian god Set murdered his brother Osiris and would transform into a black pig as well as being an enemy of Horus, thus the taboo of eating swine still being a religious prohibition among Jews and Muslims even still today because those religions sprang and grew in the same geographically and culturally coterminous Levant area which included ancient Canaan), see also Classification of Demons which could very well mean that the Devil-Satan-Lucifer is really just one of many Devil-Satan-Lucifers with God being the main one as you’ll see later.
There’s absolutely no Egyptian mention at all actually, none whatsoever at any time that has been discovered that backs up what was anonymously written in Exodus and lots of the Old Testament, nothing by any other nearby nations and their leaders and writers either. Nothing mentioned or recorded even later referring to something even remotely similar happening from that time or any time by any other peoples either…ever. It’s also quite interesting that the majority of biblical scholars believe that Exodus and the first five written books (Pentateuch aka Five Books of Moses) were a product of the Babylonian captivity (6th century BCE) and completed with final revisions only during the post-Exilic period (5th century BCE) and a growing number of biblical scholars of the opinion that probably even later in the 3rd century BCE, it’s even generally accepted that the Moses superhero character portrayed in the books did not author or write any of the text material because of the numerous contradictory information and chronologies that don’t add up, impossible time sequences and natural world/cosmic processes, wrong verified known historical information and time travel/alternate universe scenarios etc (To put it in perspective, it would basically be like all American historians, as well as all Canada, Mexico and South American country writers, never making any mention or commenting at all about the Abraham Lincoln or JFK assassination, about the American Civil War or even the events of 9-11 up to today, just simply left out of the news and newspapers and media everywhere…never recorded, commented about or mentioned by any historians or anybody, nobody talking about it or writing the smallest mention about it…as if it never even happened…just crickets, just like the many other biblical instances of fabulist wow-ism). I’m not even going to get in the whole Neanderthal DNA, Cro-Magnon man, various mostly extinct archaichuman populations, Early European and Eurasian Human populations and migrations, long forgotten civilizations that are many thousands of years older than the whole universe is supposed to be according to the charlatan book writers/stage and microphone verbal diarrhea jimble jamblers.
The bible scene (Genesis 32:22-32) where Jacob takes on God in a wrestling match that lasted about 60 rounds “all through the night”, God lost. Best wrestler and headlock ever and “Neewww Canaanite Heavyweight Champion of the Wooorld!” (Later after Jacob was given the new name Israel, he went back to his 2 wives and female slaves and celebrated that’s for sure, this desert god is such a ridiculous chump stooge that he can’t even beat a puny human, pfff that’s just ridiculous). Btw, the very name “Israel” literally means “fighter against god” or “the one who fights/wrestles against god” (Yisrael). More information HERE and about him and then his sasquatch brother later.
When you have biblical experts and scholars even telling you that it’s basically mostly invented stories and incredible exaggerations, because they’ve studied all the sources for decades, then that has to mean something. That’s right, scholars who have studied all the oldest ancient biblical sources readily admit that most of the written events and many times the people characters, probably never existed. The only thing is, they write their findings based on actual proven sources and evidences for the benefit of the reader, not to sell books or sell holy tap water and fake miracles to help you get a bigger welfare check or hamburgers falling from the sky to feed your hungry family.
Doctor said…”Don’t wait, call the number on your screen”.
Maybe the reader still may not understand what I’m talking about, many of the types I’m talking about want you to just believe them on “faith”, to believe only written words in the bible as the absolute truth based on “faith,” (Well, just the words or points that they point out anyway). However, this is just plain nonsense and self-delusion, it’s more accurately described as “hope”, you just “hope” something will happen and hope that coincidences and probabilities will go your way because if it really was faith then “it would happen”…everytime, it’s basically “Hope-ium”. Look, here’s an analogy, and remember, your eternal soul, existence and afterlife will depend on your decisions and beliefs likewise…..
Jimmy Swaggart came back from the dead again? But we’ve already got too many Jimmy Swaggarts abominations already as it is. (Which reminds me, and more about this later, did you know just how easy it is for anyone to become a so-called “Pastor”? It’s so easy that any pointless shmuck on the street who knows how to read can become one, how do you think all these scamvangelists and telescamvangelist specimens started out? It’s so easy you can even take an online course and presto-magico become a pastor in no time, and practically overnight be wearing impressive name tags with “Pastor Bill” or “Pastor Jill” or whatever your name is, it’s so easy anyone with a grade 3 education can become a “pastor”. And you won’t even have to know ancient Greek, Hebrew, Aramaic, Latin or any of the languages actually used to write the stories, you won’t have to know what the words mean or even know real history or science, heck no, you won’t even have to know who wrote the stuff, where or when it was written or who it was actually intended and written for, heck no, just only be able to memorize just a few lines here and there and just make up the rest and imaginary b.s. Then in no time you meet even just 5 people once a month or week and it’s your church now, then you can even baptize people in a pool which many pastors do, and then come all the great tax-exempt status, loopholes and tax-free faith seeds blessings. Because it’s just a business remember, being a “Pastor” is only a job description not a qualification, then you can write books about anything inventing all sorts of nonsense for your fans and put your name on the cover…”How To Talk To Cheese by Pastor Pete” or “The Wisdom & Blessings Of Listening To Cheese with Pastor Dave”, “Let Cheese Into Your Life For True Blessings”, “Let The Voice Of Cheese Speak”, “Cheese’s Prophecies Today And What It Means To You” and of course “Discover The Truths & Ancient Secrets Of Cheese by Pastor Bill” or whatever your name is, you can then also likewise just make stuff up and now you’re an “author” as well as a “pastor”. LOL, it’s true, then you can even organize retreats, conventions, cruise ship holidays, trips, all sorts of events…with “Pastor [enter name here]”, and the main thing is you really don’t have to know anything or even know what you’re talking about just mainly invent meanings and make up lots of horseshit, you’ll even upgrade from comfy sweaters, polo shirts and slacks to suits and ties with a wall framed pastor certifcate as a bonus, even fancy plastic name tags not just the peel and stick on name tags. People will be amazed and in awe of your newfound pastoring gabbing powers and pastoring knowledge (Oh and did I mention you will also become one of the world’s best and most eloquent lying professional beggars? yep, day after week after months and years and years of honing your professional beggar skills, among the best beggars in the world actually), the neighbours will mow your lawn for you and kids on the street will be joyfully greeting you “Hey Pastor Dan! that sure is great looking luggage, where you off to this time Pastor to Afghanistan?!” What a great racket and easy tax-free faith seeds because of your new lackeys and duped feeble-minded fans, you’d be crazy not to, you’ll never have to shop at Walmart again). .
You are a passenger on a jet airplane about an hour before the plain should start its descent to approach the runway and land. But the pilot and co-pilot both strangely suddenly die of a heart attack. (Too many fried foods, undercooked salmon maybe, I don’t know why, they just did). Some passenger stands up from his seat and says. “I once was thinking about becoming a pilot, I read all the manuals, dozens of them, I studied videos, did simulations using the information at home, I think I know which controls to use and get this plane landed without crashing, it’s common sense and will come back to me I’m sure, I think I can land the plane and save our lives!”. Then some other passenger gets upout of their seat and says “Behold dear brethren, I have the faith, all one really needs is faith in the word and that faith will land this jet airplane through me as the Lord’s instrument, it is only through our faith in what is written by God that we can all be saved and get this plane landed safely.” Someone asked the 2nd guy, “Well, do you know anything at all about jet airplane controls, what they do, how to use them to land the plane?” He replies “No, nothing, but I have the utmost faith that I will land this plane, it is only through faith that we can be saved, the Lord will save us by making this plane land if we just all have the faith that he will do it.” So, if you are the other passengers who are going to decide which guys hould take a shot at landing the plane, who are you going to choose?…
Step right up folks I’m making a miraculous camel dungpile right before your very eyes, Praizzze Gawd! GLO-RY! (Look at the guy in the blue dress shirt, he gets a 9.8 out of 10 for great technique and a superlative finish, without a doubt this gif should be included when Googling for the internet definition of “dregs of society”, and probably “stupid white people” and “shit for brains freakshow” also, heck probably “suspension of disbelief delirium”, “overcompensating for failed delusional expectations”, “pointless white trash”, “televised psychosis displays”, “blood magic filth shenanigans”, “Abrahamic religions voodoo trash circus” and of course “hocus pocus fraudsters” too and a bunch of other fitting terms actually).
…Pick the guy with some basic fundamental knowledge about operating and landing a plane and who seems to understand the basic principles and controls involved, or just go back to your seat, put on the seat belt and have faith that the other guy will miraculously land the plane? All just because he has the faith that he will do it. (He has the faith that he will do it dagnabit! Dam you all unbelieving fools he has the faith!). You can similarly try this out at home yourself sometime actually, just hop in your car and step on the gas aiming towards a high cliff then step off the gas but don’t brake, as the car is still coasting fairly fast just have the faith that the car will come to a speedily and safe halt before going over the cliff. That’s a pretty fun and easy exercise to try out, let me know how it turned out and I might do a post about it. Good luck with that and don’t forget to send some pics and video footage.
This farcical ridiculous Garden of Eden adventure is the earliest biblical fable involving humans and it’s a story that will be revisited and explored later, (just one of 4500+ year old pagan Mesopotamian-Canaanite-Egyptian and other Semitic people’s pagan magical characters, ideas, abstract concepts, stories and fables, as well as Zoroastrian, Greco-Roman mythologies and astrotheology etc that found it’s way into anonymous biblical author’s world views and deserts behaviorisms), and right from the start people are misunderstanding and televangelists-preachers erroneously retelling the text that is actually written, by them simply blaming the Adam and Eve characters for being duped by a talking snake, but when all the written information of the fable is understood in context and clearly shown by the written transpired events, the very first “person” or thing to get duped is not them, the first one to actually be duped in the narrative is…god, that’s right, the supposed most powerful and most wisest “all-knowing” god character of the story was caught absolutely clueless just a few pages into the novel and got duped by a talking snake (How embarrassing, walking around his garden and asking “Adam where are you?…Who told you that bla bla bla?”, yep totally clueless it seems and definitely not a good hide ‘n seek player either). It’s a very major snafu blunder and the reader right from the start of the novel gets the strong feeling that this main master of the universe god deity character is not very bright or as “all-knowing” as he claims and keeps reminding to other characters that he is, which sets the tone for later plots, characters and stories in the novel. More about this later.
“God Said It…I Believe It…That Settles It” as the saying goes…The Hebrew concept of “the universe” during the Old Testament Biblical superheroes times is actually the forerunner to those Flat Earth Theory people who are still around today, according to the Yahwehism-Jehovahism beliefs Earth was within a dome and the blue sky was even believed to be a wall of water floating in the atmosphere with literal pillars supporting the flat earth which had ends, rain was believed to be God tipping his rain jars and snow was kept in the snow storage houses, that earthquakes are caused by god’s anger, that there were no rainbows before the Noah superhero, that the Moon has a light of its own, that stars fall from the skies etc…etc…etc. Also according to their understanding and knowledge of the known world which consisted of mainly just the Levant, then in the corresponding map seen above Europe, Asia, Australia, North America and South America would be located in outer space somewhere and not on the flat earth disc, it’s pretty easy and plain to see that the newly concocted Yahweh-Jehovah tribal deity was just their “God of the Middle East” and without a doubt was never a God of the Danube, Alps, Carpathians or Mississippi, Ural, Ganges rivers etc. However, even this wrong world view as well as many other biblical views, beliefs, events and legends characters actually directly derive from the ancient Mesopotamian religion, and even elements from ancient Egypt. i.e. – from the religious beliefs and practices of the civilizations of ancient Mesopotamia from since 3500 BCE, so it’s clear and strange, but not surprising, to see that the Hebrew Jehovah-Yahweh God gave secret news scoop tips to his writers to basically copy ancient pagan cosmological world views and religious beliefs and stories, adapt and personalize them and then pass them off as his own. You’ll also soon see that lots and lots of ideas, characters, legends, beliefs and views were borrowed from them also.
If you read the bible without believing it, if you read it and realize it’s just another people’s national myths and folklore, just primitivism and a bunch of stories and mythologies written by obsessively superstitious people from the Bronze/Iron Age deserts – then it becomes increasingly apparent that they attributed the most circumstantial events and psychological traits to their god (aka “God of the Middle East”). After reading it you can then ask yourself does this sound familiar? Is this the same “real world” you live in or a world you could easily step into and just continue living and thinking and acting as usual alongside one of “their world” characters and their world thinking views and behaviorisms, or vice versa? (I guarantee if you did teleport there you would be stoned to death in no time just as god commanded), Or does it sound much more like fables and fiction characters? The bible and Abrahamic religions screams out loud of an ancient desert peoples who knew nothing of psychology, natural science, earth science, physics, astronomy, geography, coincidence, human fallibility and even cases of basic biology and hygiene, it’s a book that actually even celebrates ignorance in those fields, where anyone hearing voices was experiencing god talking and angels or demons under every rock and behind every bush. The writings and character’s quotes come across more as absurd kitsch comedic drama with a penchant for the distasteful and even warped demented side. Click open the image of earth for full view of the universe. .
…And if the Nephilim were on the Earth before but also after the flood in ancient Canaan, did they make their own ark also or did they sneak onto the ship hiding in the hay?, or were they just really good swimmers? or they just simply teleported to the future? And since they were made by the “Sons of God” does that mean they’re brothers of Jesus? But they went after women and Jesus was a fisher of men, so that’s weird (why not just go fishing for fish it’s not homoerotic enough? that’s why it’s called fishing after all). Could the Nephilim live under water for a while like Aquaman then reappear again like as if out of thin air?
Let’s face it, do these televangelists/scammers really know anything that this Jesus character purportedly said? He said, supposedly, some pretty crazy and weird things you have to admit, if he or anyone ever even said them, according to the much later anonymously written contradictory accounts stories, whoever, wherever and whenever they wrote them. Also, I noticed that if someone wants to double check and make sure they know what they’re talking about and believe in, they usually find out they’ve been believing wrongly, no mention of seed faith gifts, envelopes, miracle sand, oil or a miracle cloth at all. The opinion of one very experienced scholar that I came across was that even if he did exist according to the fables, he still comes across as nothing but a leader of a small group of traveling hobos, and that he had serious delusions, was most likely mentally ill and had disturbing self-identity issues and episodes of delirium about being a god, we also know he would have been just one of a number of many other similar self-professed leaders/gurus characters doing similar and even exact same miracle shows which was something very common during those times and areas anyway, there were holy “saviours” rising from the dead characters in written sources even saying and doing many of the same things centuries before because it was sort of like a popular fad in the Levant deserts, it was their thing.
Basically according to all the biblical stories, the gist of it is that as soon as you acknowledge your right to free will and to think and reason as an individual being with a mind and life experiences of their own, then you automatically instantly become an enemy of God and must be smited and smote for being in cahoots with Lucifer (who’s actually the planet Venus in their astrotheology, but we’ll borrow from the ancient Mesopotamians and Zoroastrian ideas and make it a Devil-Diabolus character for zany suspense).
A complete stranger rapes your mom or kills a family member then burns your house down and shoots the dog, you’re supposed to instead turn the other cheek and “love” them? Someone assaults you and robs you of everything you own, so instead give them your last piece of clothing or coat and “love” them? Hate your family but love genocidal murderous criminals? Hmmm? That sounds like a great idea, if you’re a deranged serial killer or just robbed a bank or live in another make-believe universe of opposites logic where vanillla ice cream tastes like tabasco sauce. These are strange foreign customs and abstract concepts of deranged people and filth morals basically.
Makes a great board game, look at that concentration, how can that not verily be true?!
Another very learned scholar with over 30 years of thorough study and expertise explained that according to his findings, “without a doubt even he was a completely concocted story and an imaginary moron.” Many of his colleagues agree he was a preposterous invented character with no historical evidence of existing (not in any recorded material from his alleged time or for many decades afterwards by anybody), that he had the most preposterous contradictory words attributed to him time and time again, and the fact that much older deities, legends and characters accomplished the same feats attributed to him much later, and even cases of the same rituals, which again prove he was largely a composite fiction. And very interestingly, he noted that if people were to acknowledge and live their lives according to even just the various words of the Jesus character (the purported words, parables, contradictory commands, ramblings, stories, hints, advice etc, allegedly spoken by or attributed to him by whoever at some point somewhere anyway, and lived ONLY by that), then Jesus would be completely useless and irrelevant to Christians (unless you want to teleport a bunch of demons into swine so as to make them into pork chops easier).
WOW! It’s the holy ghost what more proof do you need? even just this guy alone deserves an entire blog, actually each scamvangelist does (also able to cure every disease and ailment in the world as foretold for 16 seconds, why are not all these slapfest miracles all over the news? For shame American network news, for shame).
Also importantly, if you want to be one of these types of authors, you’ll have to be a better author and make-believer than even the authors of the bible, much more better. How so? Because let’s get real, there are so many contradictions found all throughout the written material. These days you can’t write a book you want lots of people to buy or believe using those kinds of rules. For instance, and this is right from the bible, right from the very start the reader is left confused because it’s contradicting itself on a massive scale. That is right from the very start the reader is clueless as to what is going on. Genesis 1 gives the “Creation Story” where “God” (Gods and deities/powers actually and truthfully, because the original Hebrew used word is “Elohim” which means plural “Gods”, they’re all in the same club of El who was the first original Hebrew god and god of most other Canaanite peoples and ancient Mesopotamians, all the deities/gods together make up the “Gods club of El” or “Elohim.” (Lots of ancient Hebrew names are directly derived from the name of the god EL, everyone knows that…”Isra-el”, “Dani-el, El-izabeth, Micha-el, Immanu-el, Haza-el, Ari-el, Samu-el, Hana-el, El-isha, El-isheba” etc (Danel was a mythical Ugaritic hero and we know a lot of Jewish mythology is adapted from Ugaritic and similar surrounding cultures, so most assuredly the biblical Daniel character is also mythical. The two names even mean the same thing (Daniel, “God Is My Judge” in Hebrew; Danel, “God Is My Judge” in Ugaritic), and many, many numerous other names and place name/topography examples, (in the Hebrew bible Hagar calls him by name El Roi – “the god who sees me”). Actually, a large number of scholars, researchers and archaeologists from over the last century especially agree and have put forward undeniable evidences that the origins of the Israelites is from Canaanite origins, which today is the majority consensus even by many believers and Jewish researchers and scholars. The culture of the earliest Israelite settlements in the land of Canaan and their cult-objects are clearly those of the Canaanite god El, also in the Hebrew bible it is the name El (Elyon, Elohim, El Shaddai and sometimes Baal) used many times when talking about their god Yahweh-Jehovah, it all points to the very evident and not surprising very common process of Canaanite religious syncretism. Just watch the first few minutes of this video which explains a little better what I just briefly mentioned, it’s much more complicated and things involved than just Charlton Heston, fake hocus pocus and faith seed harvests)…
…Where the the “god/gods” make different things on the different days, including all the plants and animals and then finally humanoids (both male and female) on the 6th day. Elohim then rests on the 7th day. But wait a second here, just a few sentences later in Genesis 2 it says that “God” (The name is Yahweh actually, now it’s a specific single he who’s name is Yahweh and no more “We” or “Us” (aka Jehovah and who’s different from Elohim or El, the plural “Gods Club of El”), and so now this Yahweh deity creates Adam on the 8th day, and then the plants and animals after him. This “God” tells Adam to name the plants and animals that were made for him and after him and to work the soil and take care of the garden. Then he eventually makes “Eve” from Adam’s rib, as a partner for Adam because all the animals made weren’t impressing Adam as potential partners. You know this ridiculous fairy story already probably…
Right this way, step right up folks! Amazing miracle cures plus…The 4-Legged Woman, The Camel Girl, Elastic Man, The Feejee Mermaid, Jo-Jo the Dog-Faced Boy, Lobster Boy and the Incredible Bearded Lady! C’mon in and see the holy ghost in action and remember to affix suffcient postage.
…But this is totally completely different from the “earlier” Genesis 1 “Elohim/Gods” plural account you just read seconds earlier. What the hell is going on here? Is there an interdimensional time warp taking place? You can’t write a book like that and hope to sell lots of copies of the book using this formula right from the start, right from the start in the very frst 2 chapters and there’s already 2 contradictory creation stories giving opposite information, (it’s not just different information but irreconcilable opposite information). The first chapter version has the planet being nothing but water at first and then the dry land appeared coming up after, the other 2nd chapter version has it that the earth was all just dry dusty land and then water and rain was made to appear afterwards to water the land, one version that humanoid kind was made male and female on the 6th day, but the other version that Adam was made on the 8th day then the animals and then Eve afterwards using that old rib magic trick. That’s probably why a lot of these types have sidekicks on television, someone to laugh at all their jokes, agree with everything they say, someone to “ooooh” and “aaaah” and “amen”, to repeat what they say, slap their thighs, nod and agree and chuckle, or just sit contemplatively looking into the camera nodding and saying “Glory Be call the number on your screen”…Why? What for? What are we gonna talk about the weather, recipes, fashions, moisturizing cream, illegal migration or the economy? I don’t talk about the weather, recipes or economy with absolute complete strange weirdos trying to mind control brainwash people.
Biblical scholars and apologists agree that probably 2 out of 3 prayers to God and Jesus get answered (especially with added faith shekels seeds). Thank & Praizzze Gawd GLO-RY!
AND REMEMBER IT’S JUST LIKE BILLY GRAHAM SAYS…GOD LOVES YOU, YOU’RE JUST SO SPECIAL TO HIM SO GOD LOVES YOU JUST SO, SO, SO GOSH DARN DIDDLY DARN DANG DING DONG DARNED SOOO MUCH (BUT NOT YOU KID, YOU SHOULD HAVE CALLED THE NUMBER ON YOUR SCREEN). God Said It…I Believe It…That Settles It…as the saying goes which makes absolutely no sense. With faith seeds and faith of a mustard seed and other mystical mumbo jumbo, the master of the whole universe and Alabama will forsake saving the world to instead saving your personal pointless world, 10 million children under the age of 5 die every year but dang that Holy Ghost sure comes in handy sometimes especially at sports and lotteries. He will become your very own imaginary playmate, personal genie, divine psychiatrist and cosmic butler speaking personally to just you because you’re a real somebody now and mean something special, amen to that. Praizzze Gawd! (And the holy ghost will help your earned run average and golf game too, it’s a proven fact). God: “Sorry kid I’m busy and can’t help you, I gotta arrange a miracle fumble and a miraculous botched throw to 1st to win the series, and someone needs to pass their geography and math exam”.
…Did one god (“God’s” actually like I said) make most of mankind and then another god make just Adam and Eve and his offspring? or vice versa? It sure seems like it, because the original Hebrew text in the 2 versions is verily speaking of 2 distinct and different creations with different events taking place in very different chronological orders, 2 Creation stories truthfully talking about 2 completely different creations according to the text, there’s no other way to explain it, either that or the writers of the text and/or god is mentally retarded. Also, what sort of all-knowing super-duper genius being deity gives rules about right and wrong/good and evil to some newly created humanoids who don’t even understand the concept of right and wrong in the first place? Whose newly made fresh minds would have no clue about what good or bad is or following rules much like 2 year olds in an amusement park, Heck I’m surprised they didn’t walk into the river and drown trying to pet the crocodiles, and then even tempt and tease them with a yummy fruited tree, even plant the tree right in front of their noses in the very middle of the garden? That’s just dumb, and why make a serpent with a most wise cunning mind with even the ability to talk and reason anyway? And what’s up with all that “Adam where are you? Who told you that…bla bla bla?” nonsense? This “all-knowing” being didn’t know what was going on or where Adam was or who told them things or that there was a talking snake in his very own garden in the first place? And strangely it wouldn’t have known what was going to happen in the first place beforehand? (And I find it very hard to believe that the snake could have been hiding in the bushes the whole time, or in a cave or a hole in the ground, that’s just impossible to be such a good hide ‘n seeker, there’s just no way I’ll believe that nonsense). Tempting freshly made minds that don’t even comprehend right and wrong with a yummy fruit tree is just plain dumb and asking for trouble. This supposed most powerful smartest thing in the universe being in the story doesn’t come across very all-powerful or “all-knowing” smart at all, he got easily duped and undercut by a serpent that he made and he didn’t see it coming according to the text. (If anything, knowing that it was the “Elohim” (plural gods/powers) in the Hebrew text who created the humans races, then it seems much more probable that it was the Anunnaki who did the creating, because they are the oldest primordial line of deities recorded regarding the very beginnings of humans and life on the planet, from the time that the earth was still formless and void, the Elohim would equate to being the gods Anunnaki and the Epic of Gilgamesh then being the origins of a Garden of Eden and future flood and boat stories…which it is.
Drown the bastards, smite and kill em’ all because…well…just because. (Rule #1: When in doubt or you screwed up the recipe large just smite em’ all and start over just like baking a cake, it’s God’s Way and the right smartest thing to do). Btw, this image is actually a real painting that is on display at the Creation and Noah’s Ark Museum in Glen Rose, Texas and not a joke to ridicule the feeble-minded or gullible, it could quite possibly even be a portrayal of the part where the Nephilim snuck onto the boat when Noah was gathering the penguins and stegosaurus’ (that’s how they made it to the “Promised Land” again before the Israelites, it’s the only explanation).
It should also be noted that the ancient “Old Europe” populations and societies, and the earliest Croats and their descendants, are not included as part of the biblical mythological “table of nations” list nor are they included as a part of any genealogy or chronology belonging to any Noah character in the book of Genesis. Facts and even the biblical mythology and calculated timetable show that Old Europe populations never experienced any cataclysmic flood but were instead descendants of other pre-flood populations not accounted for in the book of Genesis during Noah’s time, this would include of course Croatians, the Veneti, Balts, other later Slavic languages speaking peoples, Germanic people, Celts and any others who lived in Europe and all Eurasia around 2400 BCE. The very text of the bible excludes them as being any imaginary offspring from a fictitious Noah character and instead makes us a continuation of a pre-flood world and populations, which in reality is the case. They would actually never have been flooded nor did the populations living there ever come to an end being all destroyed, as much as this upsets bible believers, as their descendants are still here today (including me) and proven through DNA and physical and arcaeological evidences and remains. (aka the Antediluvian world by biblical sources proponents). They would not have suffered any cataclysmic flood nor were their lands affected by any all life-destroying flooding, and the reasons supporting this fact are quite simple and irrefutable (experiencing Ice Ages yes but no sudden cataclysmic flooding). Even the dating of Noah’s flood by biblical scholars using their very own biblical calculations and chronology is only to around 2400 BCE, and so any archaeological and material findings in large parts of Europe would then all have to have happened after the flood according to this timetable and belief/philosophy, believing that only populations that migrated there after Noah and the flood left behind artifacts. However this is absurd as any scientist and archaeologist will tell and show you. Without even getting into the totally mind-boggling absurd mathematics and science behind easily debunking the fable, such as the making of the huge watertight ark by just a few sheepherder guys in the iron age, all the animals from around the world, the food, feces and air needed to survive (the ark had only one 2 ft sqaure window, they would have all died of methane gas exposure in no time..p.u!), it having to have rained almost 30 feet of water per hour for 40 days when a heavy downpour is about 1-2 inches per hour, so even the wooden ark itself would have been bombarded like a catterpillar walking on a rock under Niagara Falls, etc, etc, etc. The mythological “Table of Nations” scenario is a fiction basically invented by minds with personal agendas (modern day fundamentalists and gurus will try to connect many modern nations as being descendants of and springing forth from a Noah character, but it’s just fiction based on even more fiction stories, it makes for amusing movies but that’s about it). This is a fact, the Genesis “table of nations” text EXCLUDES any populations in Europe and Eurasia because the pre-flood populations living there never experienced any cataclysmic flood but continue to this day and their physical remains are still being discovered today. Reality 1..Desert cave invented fables 0. (There are even 2 contradictory Flood stories in the Hebrew Torah and Bible even to this day, which many don’t know about or want to talk about probably because it complicates the plot in movies and films and action figure toys. Another case in point to ponder…is it 2 of each animal or 7 pairs (14 animals) that went on the ark?…
We know because it’s been proven that a number of plot themes, plot elements and characters in the ancient Mesopotamian Epic of Gilgamesh (circa. 2100 BCE) only much later came to be used and incorporated in the personalized myths and fables of numerous Canaanite and other people’s cults in the Levant/Middle East, including most notably in the later Abrahamic religions – especially the accounts of the Garden of Eden, Tower of Babel and Genesis Flood myths narratives. Each cultic center and tribal people personalized them for their own purposes, these myths and fables were very popular with the various emerging cults at that time because of the various action, drama, romance, zany suspense (some suspension of disbelief also of course) and some wow elements which really impressed the camel cowboys and shepherds, sort of like Thanos saving Doctor Strange and his family but drowning the rest. Example: “Look Noah’s safe on that boat with 14 of each animal but we and all our babies and children and the bunnies and ponies are going to drown on this rock!”…WOW!…see what I mean? It doesn’t get much more zanier suspense than that. (and besides, according to the narrative entirely killing the various humanoids populations is one thing, but why the horses, bunnies, kittens, deers, ducks, and all the other animals also, just what the heck kind of reasoning and logic exactly is behind killing all the animals in the world? What the heck did they do?, that’s animal cruelty probably. For a remarkable detailed recreation of the sound during the deluge click here, amazing!). It seems most people have been so desensitized to this Noah and the Ark story, and other stories, that they don’r really even think about what they’re hearing or reading, think about it, if the Devil/Satan character had sent torrential rains and floods to wipe out and drown all the babies, children, people and innocent animals in the entire world, televangelists would have a field day joyously and constantly pointing out how corrupted, evil and despicable he was that he even killed all the innocent animals, children, babies and humanoids…”Do you see?! it’s written right there!, he’s a despicable murderous killing evil killer Devil GLO-RY!” (Besides, Geez talk about overcompensating, don’t quote me on this but this may very well be the origins from where the later popularly used term “Fuck The World” came from). But even more weird, strange and funny is that afterwards this God admits he made a mistake and that the flood was actually pointless and it didn’t really solve anything or change anything at all, in the story he admits he screwed up and all the flood killing was a bonehead decision, so it was basically just all for nothing…lol, great going GENIUS!
…Make up your mind whoever wrote these bizarre dumb stories. (clean and unclean animals??? Holy Moly, what does that even mean exactly in the context of burnt offerings??? unclean burning animal hair smells different or their burning carcass looks nicer? Some animals are more holier than others?, then it’s no great bonus being a clean holy animal that’s for sure. Why even make/invent unclean animals in the first place if you can’t even burn them accordingly, or eat them, they’re pointless to even invent and save on the boat then, and also why the deranged obsessive fixation with constantly demanding to have animals burned as a sacrifce for him anyway? This is the most perfect wise being or thing in the entire universe and sounds like satisfactory logical demands?…”Burn all these such and such animals for me I tell you, their blood and burning carcasses aromas please me to my nostrils!”…sniiiiiffff…Waaaa?). It would actually have to be 7 pairs of clean animals and not just 1 pair if Noah immediately performed many more animal sacrifces/burnt offerings to his God after landing the ark as per instructions by his god, otherwise lots of species would have gone extinct almost immediately, Noah was told by his God right after the flood to immediately go and burn as an offering…get this….1 OF EVERY CLEAN ANIMAL. (The extra pairs of clean animals would then logically be needed and put on the ark not to save them but instead specifically for later burnt offering sacrifces by Noah as instructed by his god, because the flood didn’t kill enough clean and unclean animals obviously, but mainly because if you burn even just one clean cow or sheep or goat or chicken/bird after leaving the ark, then they’re automatically immediately extinct. Burning even just one of each clean animal as instructed by Noah’s God would have meant extinction, it would have meant only vegetarians from that time forward. The 7 pairs of animals were specifically required solely for 1 reason and one reason only, so as to sacrificially burn them later).
“Every Day A Friday” – Joel Olsteen. Wow so epic, deep and evocatively compelling while wiping your ass on the shitter on a Tuesday. With a book title like that you know it’s just more bullshit on top of other bullshit. Every day is NOT a Friday in the real world or my world, everyone knows that and every calendar in the world can’t be wrong and just him right. Pulling book titles and sermon topics out of thin air using just invented abstract concepts and imaginary ideas not based on the real world is just so easy like I said. Why is he always looking at the ceiling anyway? Is there a big huge spider up there or is it verily raining Benjamin Franklins again? Besides how pathetic and despicable, always using other people’s quotes to sound deep and real (feel free to retweet that).
Let me expound even a little more on this particular dumb biblical fairy tale story, since it is so important to all 3 Abrahamic religions just as the whole Genesis fairy tale, as well as their shows/movies and action figure toys and posters, It shows just how absurd and ridiculous supposed bible scholars even these days are when they attempt to explain things and make the reader out to be some moron idiot. Take a look below at the internet example of the supposed “logic” used in trying to explain away the obvious contradictions that are written right there in front of everyone to read (and actually putting words into his god’s mouth in the process to explain the contradictory mistake and then update the contradictory information with their subterfuge smoke and mirrors double talk “logic” of absurdity, what else is new). Here’s just one example of bizarro-logic mental gymnastics explaining obvious plain to read contradictory information by using added bizarro-basic math mumbo jumbo to contradict what is written…
In my math world 1 pair does not mean 7 pairs and vice versa, 2=2 and 14=14, and 7-1 still leaves ONLY 6 pairs, that’s just the way I roll. (during a math test it’s not “what is only 2 + 5?…15 because it didn’t say only 5). Only people with selective, source and systemized amnesia believe it’s 1 pair and 7 pairs being the same thing, (just like the text excerpts saying it rained for 40 days, but also that it rained for 150 days), a very common problem when reading biblical material actually as more examples will be discussed. Besides all the proven contradictions and improbabilities of this event ever having taken place in real life in the real world and real universe, even just the very basic general premises of this farcical myth are so ludicrous that only feeble-minded shmucks would believe it to be true, such as Ken Ham being just one example (see 39 Problems with the Noah’s Ark story).
It’s obvious that the above biblical “scholar” is incapable of performing the most rudimentary and simplest of math, and that after graduating from their seminary they still don’t know how to read and understand a very basic sentence, such as “…of “every” living thing….bring “two” of every kind” and then “of every clean animal by sevens”. It’s obvious this seminary scholar should never work at a job that requires reading and following basic instructions as well as performing simple grade 3 math also. Heck, they would screw up making a can of soup, get all confused regarding amounts, measurements and ingredients, then start making up different scenarios to cover over the blatantly obvious mistakes/contradictions of the soup company. If the soup can label required to add a 1/2 can of milk and 1/2 can of water, they would play god and make up their own instructions and then imply that this is what was really meant and not what’s written on the soup can label (aka charlatan mental gymnastics apologetics). Probably just add a whole can of milk instead, why?…As in “Why did you add a whole can of milk instead of 1/2 water and 1/2 milk as per the soup can label you blithering scoundrel knave?”…..”Well, I used simple logic chef because it’s plain to see, because milk is verily mostly just water anyway, after all it doesn’t say it’s “only” just water, therefore both halves are really just talking about milk.” The above biblical scholar “logic” has explained the soup instructions contradictions and soup company label mistake, well done, bravo. (the pigeon and falcon both have feathers, so they’re also both really just pigeons, you can extend this absurd math and reading logic to the number of eggs or cups of sugar in recipes or what 2 + 8 is if you want). I’m not going to even touch the answers I came across where the bible expert out of the seminary was also “explaining” (lol, gotta love invented abstract concepts) how the dinosaurs would have easily fit into the ark etc. (one explanation is that most of them were still in their eggs, you might as well believe in talking donkeys and snakes then). I don’t go that far into the realm of the bizarro and absurdity. (I’d really like to hear their explanations as to why the biblical god doesn’t repent but actually constantly repents and why god is actually the devil and satan, which I’ll show later with biblical evidence).
The basic gist of it is, if God or Satan tell you to do a census then God and/or Satan will kill and smite you for it and that’s a fact. You’ve got to obey Satan-God and that’s a fact, and for someone who says he’s all-knowing, all-powerful and all-wise and that he never changes his mind or repent…well he sure does change his mind a lot and repent, more problematic “god-spoken contradictions”. (Actually this particular contradictory conundrum will be largely explained later when it’s realized that “Satan” was originally simply just an adjective and even a personal attribute of “God” when he/it was feeling displeased and in a smiting angry mood, and as an “appointed position” long before becoming invented as a noun and then later still as a person growing horns, sharp teeth, pointy tail and knobby knees etc, You’ll see later that in the earliest OT text narratives and mythologies stories examples that God is Satan committing the evil basically, and/or a personality trait of him).
These are the types of subversive identity destroying sect mind control modus operandi I’m talking about, very sly and dangerously subversive agendas based on Confrmation bias. And this is just one of numerous other even more perplexing and obvious contradictions. And in the end the scholar still didn’t explain the main point of the topic anyway, as to why people still only talk or mention just 1 pair of animals instead of 14 animals each that is written in the text. All that the above seminary bible scholar expert did was prove my points that he’s confused in his failed attempt to equate the completely contradictory text AND that it ACTUALLY IS 14 animals/7 pairs mentioned and NOT only 2 animals/1 pair “of EVERY living thing” that went on the boat, he admitted it himself by using his logic and so I am doubly vindicated, thus sayeth the Lord of Ben-El Shareem. (possibly also that they don’t teach people how to read and understand text/sentences in seminaries). All the Noah versions on TV and movies/pamphlets/books then have it all completely wrong, they are willfully lying to the sheep of the tribe of Judah and to you. When, Oh when Oh Lord! will your people finally be able to see a biblically true television/movie/book version of Noah and 7 pairs of animals and dinosaurs on the boat and not just 2 of every living thing?! The people are still awaiting for them truths and real movie and television Noahs and arks!
Another confused humanoid specimen who doesn’t know how to read appparently (even wearing a huge billboard doesn’t mean it’s any more true or more real). Lord of Lords at aisle 32 beside the Tic Tacs and dancercise DVDs.
Brainwashing (also known as mind control, menticide, coercive persuasion, thought control, thought reform, and re-education) is the concept that the human mind can be altered or controlled by certain psychological techniques, and these days by “authors” and people behind stage and pulpit microphones. Brainwashing is said to reduce its subjects’ ability to think critically or independently, to allow the introduction of new, unwanted thoughts and ideas into their minds, as well as to change their attitudes, values, personalities, identity, beliefs and even distort reality and the real world processes into an imaginary concocted reality and behaviorisms.
I never bought his suits, planes or babbling nonsense voodoo shtick, but many pointless humanoids do. You ever notice how televangelists in their televangelizing delirium keep trying to co-opt Jewish bible characters and superheroes as somehow being Christians and on the same team? But if all these televangelists were alive back then they would have been stoned and put to death by the Israelites before they even knew what happened or burned even one bird sacrifice Praizzze Gawd! (Many of his church membership humanoids are spoonfed so much crap that many of them are even convinced the bible was originally written in English, that Moses was Christian and they say that it’s Copeland’s charm and smile that encouraged them to join which is just plain creepy and despicable, see video at bottom for proof). Btw did you know that according to the bible and “God’s Commandments” Copeland and all the other lip-flapping scamvangelists shown throughout here are by the holy law supposed to be put to death? Yep it’s true I kid you not, but they don’t want you to know that annoying commandment law because it complicates books sales and faith seeds. When Oh When Oh Lord will your people and couch pew potatoes finally obey your command to do what must be done according to them holy words?! Praizzze Gawd GLO-RY.
Nowadays it’s all about a so-called imaginary “personal relationship” thing and no books, real history or bible needed, just only feelings, hunches, prickly ears, echoey voices in your head, whispering winds, rustling leaves, falling snowflakes and him speaking to just you anywhere you go, telling you news scoops tips of the day and secrets of the universe (lottery numbers and sports scores to bet, best hotel reservations, cheapest internet provider, which pie to bake, how to crochet and get an A in algebra and other amazing eternal truths of the cosmos miracles). Look at that cloud over there, it could be Jesus talking to you you never know.
Another scamvangelist supremo Jesse Duplantis who’s also part of one of the numerous nefarious “Televangelist Trinities” I mentioned, so anyway that explains that. Jesus didn’t come back and is 2,000 years late from his very own guaranteed personal prediction simply because people haven’t been donating enough harvest faith shekels for 2,000 years, get donating people Jesus’ cosmic jet plane to earth and fuel ain’t free you know.
God Said It…I Believe It…That Settles It…Demons are everywhere, even spurious Kenneth Copeland’s sweater is demonic and that’s a fact. For preaching bullshit fraudsters with net worths from 10s of millions to over 300 million dollars personal net worth and expecting a rapture any day, they sure do write lots of books and make too many wrong predictions (Strangely many telescamvangelists in their fixated and manic-obsessed alternate universe reality delirium are so consumed with fabricated chicanery mythomania they even think that they’re Jewish for a bunch of weird and absurdly lame nonsensical reasons, pfff as if).
And since on the topic of Christmas sweaters ala Pat Robertson above, then shouldn’t he as well as all the scamvangelists, telescamvangelists and their minions et al be more biblically correct and be wearing the appropriate and the actual authentic real “Ugly Christmas Sweaters” during the holidays that is more in line with their scriptures and beliefs?, instead of the heathen pagan European Hibernal Solstice themed symbologies and characters ugly sweaters which are definitely probably demons inspired obviously (such as those heathen rabbits, elves, ducks and deers, diabolical sleigh riders and nefarious trees and snow flakes instead of rightfully having camels, scrolls, possessed lepers, lamps and bible characters, heck there’s not even any frikin snowmen in the Levant and deserts anyway for cripe’s pete’s sake!).
Cherry picking, suppressing evidence, or the logical fallacy of incomplete evidence is the act of pointing to individual cases or data that attempts to confirm a particular position while ignoring a significant portion of related and similar cases or data that contradict that position, or even pretending that it doesn’t exist, therefore the entire corpus of all 3 Abrahamic religions scripture is proven to be hogwash.
And coincidentally that’s EXACTLY what the alleged Saul/Paul character was saying all along also (who is actually the first letters writing author of any NT material supposedly, although half the letters are proven to be later forgeries by unknown writing fakers pretending to be a Paul), as in he himself admits that “everything” and anything he knows about any Jesus character was only after getting sunstroke and then later getting occasional secret visions and esoteric cryptic messages planted into his brain from outer space (Paul, who according to his very obscure and odd used terminologies and worldview, and imminent zombifications cosmology theologies and behaviorism had obvious schizotypal personality disorder issues, and apparently knew nothing about any actual physical Jesus character being born, living, preaching, doing any miracles and zombifying or having any earthly disciples or even dying on earth as a real earthly person and no empty tomb talk or mention at all either of course, and in 2 Corinthians 12:1-7he also said that he personally knew someone who even “floated up into outer space” to look around paradise at the “third heaven” in outer space but he wasn’t allowed to speak about what he supposedly saw or heard, lol sure why not because outer space is where it’s at (see Jesus From Outer Space information later). The biblical stories authors, superheroes and characters (and many times even today’s charlatan gurus and preachers conmen) readily admit that their hunches, information, tips and “sources” came “from visions” (and/or hallucinations), “dreams” (while sleeping/taking a nap), “telepathic conversations” (the lord spoke to me while in the bathtub, while doing yoga, eating my muffin etc) and that the biblical text source material conclusively and very apparently shows obvious vestiges and still present occurrences of practicing of and religious belief in…omens (prophet walks naked for 3 years as an omen, a sundial’s shadow hocus pocus magically moves backwards as an omen while prophesying in Isaiah and 2 Kings…lol), totemism (Moses’ bronze serpent on a rod, winged cherubim creatures on ark, other various human-animal hybrid and anthropomorphic creatures examples), mechanisms attributing multiple contradictory meanings to text and/or illogical impossible natural world processes (stars falling to earth/moon turning to blood, stopping simultaneously rotation of earth and orbit of moon for a full day in Joshua, reanimating corpses/zombification in 2 Kings, human lifespans extending to many centuries long etc), astrotheology and cosmic representations of deities and/or characters by planets/stars/sun/moon (e.g. – planet Venus-Lucifer as representing the king of Babylon/Devil/Jesus at different times), ritualistic superstitious behaviourism (precise animal sacrifices laws and dietary laws, important precise grooming, hairstyles and fashion laws etc), cannibalism (as ordained by the Yahweh-Jehovah God by eating of family members and neighbours in Deuteronomy, Jeremiah, Leviticus etc, e.g. – Jeremiah 19:9 “I will make them eat the flesh of their sons and the flesh of their daughters, and they will eat one another’s flesh” and as a later traditional symbological ritual), appropriated religious naturalism depictions of their main Yahweh-Jehovah deity as a volcano god, storm god, as fire, smoke, wind, shrubs, or as a pigeon etc, and most especially common various not of this world strange beings descending and/or speaking from outer space, which basically means that anybody can likewise make up and write their own “personal sources” using the exact same methodologies and thought behaviors.
Even the Saul/Paul character admits the exact same thing in his writings as mentioned above, you gotta float up past the sky first to get to the different levels of heavens out there in outer space, up, up, up and away like a balloon to the clouds then into outer space. Not surprisingly the anonymous OT stories writers also believed in the same theological cosmology space is the place people.
The 700 Club television host Pat Robertson is part of the despicable unholy “Televangelist Trinity” abomination along with Oral Roberts and Jerry Falwell, (although Creflo Dollar, Kenneth Copeland and Peter Popoff are another infernal “Televangelist Trinity” along with John Hagee, Billy Graham and Bob Larson being another one also, basically there’s lots and lots and way more lots of vile infernal “Televangelist Trinities” abominations floating-bullshitting around), he is an author, media mogul, CEO of Regent University, chairman of the Christian Broadcasting Network (CBN) among other projects, he started his career as a failed faith healer and failed prophecy guru but believes that God talks to him personally giving him secret revelations and the inside scoop, (after numerous wrong and failed prophecies since the 1970’s he is still the head guru leader of many morons and wrote numerous pointless and bestselling books). Among numerous (and I mean numerous) ridiculous jimble jamble absurd statements he even claims martial arts, yoga and stretching breathing exercises is actually inhaling demons leading to demon possession, he also claims he commanded Hurricane Florence to stay away from damaging his Regent University and CBN properties in Virginia Beach with a shield of protection from God and Jesus-God to instead veer back to sea (especially because it was during one of two major annual telethons that fund the ministry), incredibly the hurricane did verily veer!…it veered causing 25 billion dollars in damage, dozens of innocent deaths and many Christian homes and churches were destroyed and damaged (it seems the hurricane didn’t veer nearly enough and his infernal televangelist black magic witchcraft protective shield was not big or powerful enough either). Interestingly, Robertson’s similar previous walls of protection shield witchcraft commands failed to spare Virginia Beach from Hurricane Bonnie in 1998 or from Hurricane Isabel in 2003, and of course there was the mega-Hurricane Katrina in 2005 that was the worst causing $125 billion in damage and thousands of deaths. (for those readers in Canada well lucky you, because now there’s 700 Club Canada programming to enjoy even more pointless made up stories, feelings hunches, invented drivel and plain lying scum charlatan’s garbage, temples of anarcho-communist one-worlder mind control filth, get your checkbooks and credit cards ready and expect a harvest and lots of books, begging and sweaters too, and don’t forget to record Pat Robertson’s other amazing failed prophecies and baseless jimble jamble opinions to share with co-workers and neighbours. Don’t wait just call the number on your screen). Oh, also good to know, he’s 91 years old and thinks his god is going to bless him with another 29 years to live so that he can make it to 120 like the Moses character, (tough luck cancer kids, the righteous they must live I tell you because the lord’s work and television shows must go on, and let the revolting display of utter dross video loop about 100 times to really let it sink in to make you disgusted and want to puke blood). Which just goes to show you again that he’s out of touch with reality living in an alternate universe existence and even lacking basic simpleton common sense too, when he could have given the Methuselah 969 years and similar examples instead (who the heck wouldn’t want to live to be 969 or 500+ years but instead choose a measly 120 years example? only a dum-dum would choose that.
Even many Hebrew archaeologists and scholars readily admit and have shown numerous evidences that the early Israelites were Canaanites worshipping the god El, that the character of Moses was invented and never existed and that their historical beginnings was made up many centuries later only during and after their Babylonian captivity, which is when the first 5 books of the Old Testament started to be written. There are actually numerous multi-versions telling of stories and contradictions all throughout the early sources as well as there being 613 commandments and not just a measly 10. The original Anunnaki (as they were called) would then have been the ones that created the populations who went on to become the Hyperboreans many thousands of years later. So let us at least figure this one beginning part first before moving on to olive oiled virgin breasts, which people to stone, cursed lepers, incestuous drunk Noah’s closed boat door, Lot’s orgies and the evil drowning evil babies and cereal falling from the sky and other stuff shall we?
It’s a known fact and supported by numerous historians and biblical scholars that the sources used for all 3 Abrahamic religions were never ‘written’ by any ‘God’ whatsoever, but instead inspired by people (the vast majority being anonymous and their identities unknown) with their ownspecific hatreds, prejudices, racisms, other national political agendas, personal whims, logics, fictitious characters and historical accounts and fictitious views of the world, and they then simply just put those words into the “Mouth of their God” with their human hands and ink, aka Yahwehism-Jehovahism. (see also 613 commandments). To this day there are still no documented Egyptian records or mentions or any other nation’s records or mentions from the alluded time, or even afterwards, ever mentioning any Moses, any great Exodus, any miracles or any of the famous plagues and smiting wonders or even any archaeolgical remains evidence, it’s like trying to find Jack’s beanstalk or Hansel and Gretel’s gingerbread house as if it never even happened. More about this later.
(At this point, whatever you do, do not go searching this topic to find out on your own just what the heck is going on with even just the 2 contradictory creation stories at the start. (Trust me, they’re vastly different in chronology and events, as plain as knowing a pine tree and oak tree are different, so different they’re opposites). That’s because if you do you’ll come across some really, really, really weird people then, that’sfor sure. (I know this because a long time ago I looked into it, because I wanted to find out just exactly how the plot for this thriller/romance/murder mystery/action/drama/science fiction novel starts out exactly, the real answer to this problem is because each one comes from different anonymous source(s) and from different times, even the whole book of Genesis was actually written by “at least 4” anonymous authors from vastly different times and geographical locations, but probably even more because writing fables and stories was very popular back then and everybody was borrowing characters, abstract ideas and concepts that were floating around).
What a major malfunction of the master of the universe and the Jebusites. In the newly concocted Yahwehism-Jehovahism tribal deity religion slavery and slave beatings and killings are OK and darn swell just like before, (according to the OT god says foreign slaves were considered personal property “forever” just like the owner’s oxen, camels and sheep and could be treated ruthlessly to even the point of taking their life), but instead now shrimp, lobster and crab are bad, very bad, the shellfish are a big no-no to be frowned upon and discouraged even punishable by death if need be. Btw, experts have calculated that roughly 13 million people were bought or captured and sold as slaves between the 15th and 19th centuries (that’s not including the Arab slave trades and Islamic slave trades which in the Ottoman empire was only abolished in 1924), however an estimated at least 45+ million people (more than 4 times as many) are living in modern slavery today right now this very minute with the numbers of slaves growing annually, and according to the latest figures more than a 1/4 of them are children, basically there are more slaves now than ever. (However shellfish, lobster, shrimp and crab markets are also doing very well simultaneously). What does this all exactly mean? Well I don’t know but I’m pretty sure it means something, and it may very well involve those Long John Silver’s and Red Lobster restaurants evil cults probably, but mainly like the Abrahamic bible holy scriptures say “Slaves obey your masters” I guess and that’s the main thing.
But don’t forget! very, very important, because if you shave it your slave may laugh at your beard transgression and ridiculous appearance and be disobedient, which means you will then have to kill your disobedient slave for mocking their master as the good book says.
God Said It…I Believe It…That Settles It!!! Where’s that dang darn Gerber baby she’s got it coming! Numerous biblical scholars and critics, (already starting in the first century by various writers and commentators but especially in the last 100 years as a specifically studied and examined topic), after careful study of the written OT text have concluded that the morals of the Jewish Yahweh-Jehovah God deity character are appalling and it can even be considered as a “Moral Monster”. They conclude that it is very obviously evident that the OT Yahweh morality and moral ideals are primitive and barbaric and are just another example of the ancient Middle East’s harsh, morally-problematic social milieu, not unlike other contemporaneous and older religions during the same general time period and areas. It is also evident in the text that the new emerging “Mosaic Law” are not in any way new illuminating laws or just ideals introduced by a skydaddy to do away with or replace already present inferior societal norms and practices already common in ancient Canaanite traditions, but that they are merely only attempts by the Deuteronomist elite (reflecting the economic needs and social status of the priestly caste and including importantly the local landowning aristocrats as many of the laws pertain specifically to property and possessions…i.e. – coveting another’s or the master’s oxen, donkeys, slaves, camels etc, how to manage foreign and native slaves and when to punish them by death etc) to regulate and legitimize already tolerated and accepted social and political structures and societal norms (warfare, ethnic cleansing, polygamy, patriarchalism, bloodthirsty massacres of men, women and children, child abuse, slavery, punishments by death etc, etc, etc), thereby permitting the various older primitive barbaric social structures to continue but simultaneously getting the official “Yahweh seal of approval”, and so in the process the “Moral Monster” falls far short of any sort of new morals or divine ideal, but is instead just wearing a new robe and sandals.
According to this version you’re 100% putting your faith and future hopes in an “all-knowing” deity that from the very start got duped by a talking snake in his own garden that he didn’t even know existed, he literally had no clue.
The Yahweh-Jehovah God reminiscing about the good ol’ early days of child sacrificings with his people. Well, he did say that “he creates the evil,” so it’s really not that surprising (this of course was before satan because he didn’t exist yet until invented as a scapegoat centuries later after the Babylonian exile).
The way I see it, and hypothetically speaking to make a point, as an analogy my “God/Gods” or real creator or whatever the case may be, would be much more powerful, wise, omniscient, omnipresent and “all knowing” than the pathetic puny addleminded biblical desert tribal deity aka “Yahweh-Jehovah God”, as in it would be far more concerned with much more important, pertinent and interesting things instead of being all contradictory, irrational, bloodthirsty, obtuse, making absurd statements and giving wrong information, conversing with irrelevant desert yokels characters, repeatedly making failed threats and broken promises constantly and being concerned only with just the Middle East as being the entire universe, as well as being so neurotically fixated and obsessed with penis foreskins, clitorises, menstrual cycles, what foods to eat and not eat, what clothes and materials to wear and not wear and hairstyles to have and not have, requiring sacrifices of animals constantly, commanding slaughters of peoples and hundreds of similar obsessive pointless laws and rules and news scoop tips and hunches. Instead it would be everywhere and not just constantly be fixated and floating hanging around the Middle East all the time talking secretly to pointless galavanting desert stooges only once in a while and being all ridiculous (right from the start being duped by a talking snake in his very own garden is unequivocally ridiculous in my book). Yep, that kind of hypothetically real “God” would kick the Abrahamic tribal God’s ass easily, probably easily give him a Triple H Pedigree and then kick him out of the ring and universe, and as an analogy then actually defeating all 3 gods as per Abrahamic-ism theologies (Actually he already has since today we know without a doubt that the Earth is verily round and the Universe is much, much, much bigger than just the flat Levant area on pillars, it would never have invented pointless anglerfish abominations either, amen to that).
Numerous biblical scholars and critics, (already starting in the first century by various writers and commentators but especially in the last 100 years as a specifically studied and examined topic), after careful study of the written OT text have concluded that the morals of the Jewish Yahweh-Jehovah God deity character are appalling and it can even be considered as a “Moral Monster”. They conclude that it is very obviously evident that the OT Yahweh morality and moral ideals are primitive and barbaric and are just another example of the ancient Middle East’s harsh, morally-problematic social milieu, not unlike other contemporaneous and older religions during the same general time period and areas. It is also evident in the text that the new emerging “Mosaic Law” are not in any way new illuminating laws or just ideals introduced by a skydaddy to do away with or replace already present inferior societal norms and practices already common in ancient Canaanite traditions, but that they are merely only attempts by the Deuteronomist elite (reflecting the economic needs and social status of the priestly caste and including importantly the local landowning aristocrats as many of the laws pertain specifically to property and possessions…i.e. – coveting another’s or the master’s oxen, donkeys, slaves, camels etc, how to manage foreign and native slaves and when to punish them by death etc) to regulate and legitimize already tolerated and accepted social and political structures and societal norms (warfare, ethnic cleansing, polygamy, patriarchalism, bloodthirsty massacres of men, women and children, child abuse, slavery, punishments by death etc, etc, etc), thereby permitting the various older primitive barbaric social structures to continue but simultaneously getting the official “Yahweh seal of approval”, and so in the process the “Moral Monster” falls far short of any sort of new morals or divine ideal, but is instead just wearing a new robe and sandals. More information about this topic later.
Remember to marinade and pick up some BBQ steak sauce at the grocery store for more saucier and juicier legs and thighs, a side order of fries and coleslaw would be a good idea too probably (but no shellfish that’s forbidden).
There’s actually no contradictions of any sort in the bible not even a one (but only if you define the word “contradiction” as meaning Daffy Duck).
Yep that’s perfectly understandable so no nonsense there, they were chariots of iron and not just regular wooden chariots and wagons, even the most powerful thing in the universe has their limits after all.
Even though the snake/serpent in the mythological fable is really just a wise snake and there’s absolutely no hint of the text implying anything otherwise (and the fable where later Satan and God are on the same team torturing Job, Satan says he was just “walking” around on the earth but snakes moving around on their stomaches simply can’t walk), but just to make some people happy for the sake of argument…
Completely “all-knowing” but gets duped by a talking snake in his very own garden and didn’t even have a clue what was going on, (walking around his garden and asking “Adam where are you?…Who told you that bla bla bla?”, yep totally clueless it seems and definitely not a good hide ‘n seek player either)…yep completely verily duped and that’s the truth.
Yep, because If you come across 10 people discussing just this one topic or someone’s personal viewpoint article, you’ll come across 10 different made-up explanations, weird explanations, really weird explanations and concocted abstract concepts and ideas, some people trying to make you look like you don’t know how to read or have a brain to figure out the simplest math and basic logic and common sense.
Jesus’ and God’s plan, it’s the best way because the Lord always knows best.
They will insist that it was written by the same person and that they are the same, describing the same events and that there is no problem (magically the 6th day is the 8th day and don’t ask stupid questions). They’ll twist meanings, add meanings, take away meanings, distort what is right there on the page in front of you to instead point you onto other subjects and just believe them, each one of them has a different answer and different meanings for the written text. Talking about this page then that page and this quote and that quote, jumping thousands of years forwards and thousands backwards with the turn of a few pages to tell you their satisfactory explanation, some quote by a really strange named guy thousands of years later but usually someone anonymous, according to the books time sequence, he has the answer, see..see, all explained and simple. (What? Nobody was supposed to know the meaning of what was written in the very frst paragraphs until a weird anonymous quote from somebody thousands of years later supposedly explains it in a strange murky abstract unrealistic way, but actually really didn’t explain it because instead it just made it all even more absurd and full of jimble jamble nonsense? That sure is weird). What if you asked a scientist from every country on the planet to explain gravity or water, atoms, aluminum, hydrogen or heat?, what is it and how do we know it’s real and proven and what it consists of?, and what if each of the scientists also gave different answers and explanations and different contradictory abstract concepts as proofs in the same way, instead of straight up known evidences and the exact same mathematical equations and verified consistent proofs every single time as taught in schools everywhere, that would be just as weird. (If it was done that way too, then every time you went on a plane you wouldn’t know what the heck was going to happen).
“What’s so problematic, contradictory, mythological, hocus pocus or nonsensical in here? And what’s Zoroastrianism is that like some sort of Quiche or Couscous?”. Image: thecalvinist.net
They will slyly and cunningly using subterfuge and card and pea in a shell game tricks, like a sly wise serpent, attempt to make you believe what they want you to believe and to pay no attention to what is written or the question you asked, they’ll give you answers to questions you didn’t even ask way at the back of the book and that have nothing to do with finding out why the 2 creation stories contradict each other. Sometimes just nonsense. You’ll get stuck in a spinning vortex of smoke and mirrors, burnt offering sacrifices and smitings as you listen or read what those sly serpents want to whisper and put into your mind, you’ll be wondering and thinking maybe one of them is right, because he/she sure has a lot of verses memorized or typed so they must know what they’re talking about and be right even if you still didn’t get an answer. Yep, some really weird people that’s for sure, sometimes weird clothes and fashions too. It’s at that point that you’ll probably prefer to instead read about the ancient Hyperboreans, early Croatian history, the Unetice Culture, Bronze Age history, the Veneti etc, or perhaps even about painting, art or the study of snakes, especially to find out more about that extinct breed of snake that could talk).
(I should quickly add that even the word “God” is a very ambiguous and at many times it is a contradictory word with various meanings, these days many times even having the opposite meaning when espoused by television preachers and gurus. Today’s word “God” is from an etymology that is Gothic and Proto-Germanic from ǥuđán, originally meaning “pouring forth” as in libation, pouring forth a liquid as an offering to an idol or spirit or an invocation at a burial mound, first introduced into Wulfla’s 4th century Gothic Bible. Webster’s New Collegiate Dictionary says that the origin of the word ‘God’ comes from a Germanic word ‘Gad,’ pronounced as “Gohdt” and coming from an Indo-European word simply meaning the “invoked one” and even “Lord Moon”, as in conjuring forth and summoning up spirits and powers (Elohim? Lucifers? Shining Ones? ) also an incantation. The Babylonian Talmud of the 3rd to 5th century describes the word “god” to mean “fortune” or “luck” and states that the word is of the pagan origin, as in “But ye who forsake Jehovah, who forget my holy mountain, who prepare a table for Gad and full up mixed wine” (Isaiah 65:11). The 7th-century Origo Gentis Langobardorum, and Paul the Deacon’s 8th-century Historia Langobardorum derive their pagan named god “Godan” of the Lombards from the Norse god “Odin”, ie; Godan is their translation of the name Odin. God-an is Odin. Interestingly even the Croatian Ban/Viceroy Godemir who served under Croatian Kings circa. 969 CE, the root word of his name is also a cognate of the same word and meaning. (So then why do people thank and pray to Odin for tricks and more television channels?, instead of the biblical named god Yahweh-Jehovah? Odin may send curses your way for disturbing him, no faith seeds and pearly gates for you, unless you send a good seed faith gift for the harvest of course).
For even more amazing contradictions and wrong information about the very, very basics before even reading one mind control pamphlet or sending one faith seed shekel, even the name “Jesus” and the subversive anarcho-communist mind control cult organization “Jehovah’s Witnesses” (more about them later) is spelled and pronounced wrongly by televangelists preachers and prophets wannabes, because you see they’re all based on the Hebrew god name of “Yahweh“, which in turn is based on the Tetragrammaton which is a four-letter Hebrew word transliterated as YHWH, the name of the “national god” of Israel. And the name “Jesus” which literally means “Yahweh is salvation” is just a shorter form of the very common Hebrew name “Joshua” (which also means the exact same thing, sort of like Marie-Mary etc). Interestingly, Yahweh was also an older name already being used by other deserts pagan religions peoples and it actually was just one of a number of major gods being worshipped in ancient Canaanite religions and throughout the Levant/Middle East, such as the Edomites and Midianites among others, but later the Hebrews decided eventually to make YHWH their own personal storm god and main personal warrior deity, eventually becoming their “national god of Israel”, however adapting it and making it more personal and putting more words in its mouth doesn’t make it any more real.
The oldest occurrence of this name is in the phrase “Shasu of yhw” in an Egyptian inscription from the time of Amenhotep III (1402–1363 BCE), the Shasu referring to the nomads from Midian and Edom in northern Arabia. The current consensus based on the known archaeological and paleographical textual evidences is therefore that Yahweh was a “divine warrior from the southern region from northern Arabia associated with Seir, Edom, Paran and Teman”, and probably introduced by the travellers along the caravan routes from northern Arabia (Edom, Midian and Moab) towards Egypt, which would also partly explain why and when the Israelites decided to follow the Egyptian customs of circumcision, owning slaves and enforcing pork prohibitions also (Although El would have still remained the most popular and supreme chief god of the Israelites and others in the lands of Canaan until circa. 9th-6th century BCE or perhaps even much later, see also Shasu of YWH and Yahwehism for some more interesting background tidbits).
But the funny thing is, there is no “J” sound in Hebrew, so “Jehovah” is wrongly pronounced and spelled and if anything should be properly pronounced as “Yehovah”, the same goes for Jesus and Joshua and Judah (Yeshua, Yehoshua and Yahuda etc etc etc). Oh sweet Jesus! All the scheming fraud telescamvangelists and books writers are wrong all over the place and looking even more absurd and full of hogwash now, and the Jehovah’s Witnesses likewise even have their very religious mind control cult name wrong right from the start also, which is probably blasphemy or at the very least heresy, they can’t even get the basics of the very basics about even a name right. No amount of faith seeds, fakery, abstract concepts or microphones can change that fact.
Behold, during your psychosis fixations and alternate universe deliriums abstract jimble jamble episodes, learn also how to become a despicable professional lying beggar, brazen exploiter and spurious purveyor of the dark gospels apostle-witch and Bronze Age and Iron Age desert blood magic witchcraft, let the pew potato shmucks send you money so as to beg from and exploit many others with nonsense drivel performances, beg..sing..beg..tongues..beg…fake…beg…mumbo jumbo..beg…repeat. (best perfectly groomed hair ever and using a microphone also proves they’re incapable of lying – Genesis 15:9). For preaching bullshit fraudsters with net worths from 10s of millions to over 300 million dollars personal net worth and expecting a rapture any day or any hour, they sure do write lots of books and say stupid contradictory things, aka “deliberate obscurantism” and “systematic amnesia” for personal agendas and views.
So even the modern word God in the 66 books of the bible has an etymology that is purely of pagan origin with a meaning completely different from what people use it for today most of the time, and importantly a completely different meaning from the previously mentioned specific Yahweh/Jehovah name. (This is similar to the case of Slavic languages speaking nations, in Croatian, Slovenian, Russian, Ukrainian, Bulgarian, Polish and Belarusian the word “bog” means “god” and it was also applied as a suffx to some of the gods, goddesses, deities and spirits names in their pagan deity pantheon, “buh” and “boh” is used in modern Czech and Slovak and it’s also etymologically derived from the word “bog.” (This is similar to the case of the name “El” being used for “God” in the ancient Canaanite religions including ancient Hebrew and in the related names and toponyms etc). In this case “Bog” as well as the etymologically connected “Buh” and “Boh” have the same Pre-Christian Pagan etymology meaning earthly health/wellbeing/luck/noble, they are older than and were used long before the introduction of Abrahamic/Semitic religions and so actually have nothing to do with any biblical Yahweh-Jehova-God in the biblical stories, just like Godan-Odin. (Byelobog/Bielobog, Dažbog, Chernobog, Stribog, Boginki and Ipabog are a few examples). Nobody denies this however because it’s an established known fact, so just like the word “God” ,”Bog” also is from ancient pagan origins and has nothing to do with Semitic desert deities, tents, camels, burning animals, blood magic, temples, boats with animals and dinosaurs, eaten by large fish, talking serpents and donkeys etc). Now that you know this, when a person says “Thank God the Buffalo Bills won”, “Thank God there’s no anchovies on the pizza”, “Thank God there’s real triple bacon on the pizza”, “Thank God these jeans were on sale” or “Oh My God did you see that fumble!?” etc, then it could actually be an ancient spirit you are summoning, one that you particularly didn’t want to summon, the spirit may get angry and even put a curse on you, give you cancer, an incurable disease, die in a plane or car crash or even deform your unborn baby, perhaps even give your neighbour a disease to teach you a lesson. It could get even worse if your “God” is the same “God” that ISIS, Taliban and other similar God-talkers are always talking about it, (which it really is anyway using their narratives logic), then you are actually in league with them and their “God.” It’s the same god you are talking about after all, you are supporting “their God” because he’s also “your God.” (Actually according to the various written sources, this Abrahamic biblical GOD IS CONSTANTLY MAKING MISTAKES, CONTRADICTING HIMSELF AND REPENTING FOR HIS MISTAKES). As a matter of fact, the immense growing number of historians and scholars, since the last century of intense study especially, are of the opinion that the foreign Abrahamic offshoot mystery religion faiths and their foreign invented major tribal deity and various supporting cast of characters, are full of so many illogical theological diatribes, agenda mythicisms, invented gnostic and anachronistic fables portrayed as historical reality, bizarre absurdities, errors and contradictions, that no biblical deity should even be respected let alone worshipped as some sort of all knowing divine supreme being of the universe. Rather, these biblical mystery myth faiths and spinoff cults/religions, as well as their many early and later offshoots, are simply just products and symptoms of a decaying society and culture which needed to invent newer belief systems to exist. This then makes you a very confused, dangerous and subversive person, shame on you, you are in cahoots with subversives attempting to initiate civilizational wars and make people lose their identity, mind, personality and the real universe reality by mind control techniques and then making up drivel fiction to prove your agendas, you are quite simply not to be trusted.
More enlightening information about the real history of the original Levant deserts tribal deity god (these days aka God to many people for some weird reason), Yahweh (and the erroneously spelled and pronounced Jehovah version which is blatantly heretical), Lord, EL, Allah, El Shaddai, Elohim, Adonai. Mayor of Mount Zion, The Big Guy, The One and Only Undisputed God of the Middle East etc, and information which along with other later information I’m sure will infuriate and embarrass televangelists to their very foundations and core being because they have no real valid answer-excuses to retort, as well as scamvangelists and telescamvangelists and other related charlatan snake oil salespeople of all sorts and fashions, an excerpt from a Wall Street Journal article…
How YHWH Became God
The idea that the Hebrew god once had a consort, Asherah, was a shock to some biblical scholars…..
How did a desert war god originally worshiped by ancient Israel’s southern neighbors become the god worshiped today in churches, mosques and synagogues across the globe?
Thomas Römer’s “The Invention of God” has a deliberately provocative title. And many of his arguments—his contention that the God of Israel originally shared a temple with a sun god, for example—will be scandalous to most traditional believers. Some of his claims, like his suggestion that the temple erected in Jerusalem originally contained a statue of YHWH, or Yahweh, will be controversial even among the guild of academic Bible scholars to which he belongs.
Mr. Römer begins in the Sinai Desert at the end of the 13th century BCE, among Israel’s Edomite and Midianite neighbors, who are known to have worshiped Yahweh as a god of wars and storms. Yahweh arrived in Canaan, where the Israelites lived, brought by a group of his nomadic worshipers. In his early days, he was just another “tutelary deity,” that is, a tribal protector and patron. Those that worshiped him believed he would intervene in his people’s military battles and bring rain to fertilize their crops, just as the others before them.
Yahweh initially had a consort, the goddess Asherah, who was also known as “the Queen of Heaven.” For the ancient biblical editors and eventually modern scholars alike, the idea that a god who reigned supreme had a consort was deeply disconcerting, and yet Asherah continued to be worshiped for hundreds of years. Eventually, Yahweh became associated almost exclusively with Jerusalem, a view reinforced by the experience of an Assyrian siege of the city that was suddenly and mysteriously aborted in 701 BCE.
As they often do, tragedies and devastations had a major impact on theology. After the destruction of Jerusalem by the Babylonians in 586 BCE and the geographical dispersion of the Israelites, there was no king, no Temple and no autonomous national entity. Yahweh could no longer be worshiped in the temple and city where he lived as “a national god or as the tutelary deity of a royal family.”
Israel’s humiliating defeat at the hands of a hated foe could have led it to abandon its God. It would have been natural to conclude that Israel had been defeated because the gods of Babylonia were more powerful than Yahweh. But the Bible’s authors chose the opposite explanation, insisting that the Temple had been destroyed because Yahweh had used the Babylonians to punish his unfaithful people. Mr. Römer explains that “if YHWH can make use of the Babylonians, that means he can control them; therefore, he is more powerful than the gods of Babylon.”
This is, Mr. Römer suggests, “a prelude to the monotheist idea.” Ironically, then, the crushing defeat of Judea gives rise to the monotheistic insistence that its God is all-powerful and universal. The history of theology sometimes takes wild and unexpected turns.
Mr. Römer’s work is not for the faint of heart. Drawing heavily on recent findings in archaeology and epigraphy, it is extremely technical: “Commentators have often wondered whether ‘Elyon’ was really a god who was distinct from El, given that the name is also attested without ‘El.’ In fact there is mention of a god Elioun, called Hypistos (‘the most high’) in Greek, who appears in the ‘Phoenician history’ composed by Sanchuniaton, extracts from which have reached us via the Church father Eusebius, who cites them in his Praeparatio Evangelica 1.10.15-29.” Follow that? (Basically the biblical god is just a borrowed and mutated deity that at first belonged to various other desert nomadic tribes during the Bronze Age and Iron Age, and then later still was more personally transformed in various ways and given more magical hocus pocus powers. Like the song says I guess…”Gimme That Ol’ Time Religion”, whatever that means).
For the last 6,000 years it only likes hanging and floating around the Middle East universe which is his personal turf stomping grounds and fave and only hangout on the planet. He has a weird fixation thing about needing blood and bloody sacrifices all the time for some reason also, it’s really important because some talking snake duped him and he’s mad as heck since then, something like that.
You know right from the start of the novel that you’re gonna be in for quite a weird and strange bizarre ride, when a measly puny talking snake completely ruins the plans of the main protagonist all-powerful, all-knowing, perfect, smiting, angry, jealous, repenting, genocidal, bloodthirsty and sacrifices demanding god character in his very own garden and he didn’t even have a clue about what was going on. From this point forward, a lot of the facts and points presented and mentioned are luckily thanks to the investigative studies and intensive scholarly work of others which makes this post pretty easy. Although much of the topics and information is very accessible and easily readable today by anyone in any bible, torah and koran or book store if so inclined, over the last few centuries and especially the last century and decades, much more information has been dissected, explored and studied which has resulted in very different information and conclusions being reached than from just theological “traditional sources” and repeated unfounded legends. Including the presentation of numerous proven contradictions, interpolations, forged writings, mythologizing, many anonymous writings and selected excerpts patchwork from different sources, censuring and destruction of sources, theological mythological narratives, events and characters being portrayed as real history and real events and characters, sectarian primitive planetary, cosmic and natural world views and concepts including primitive desert blood magic rituals, competing invented abstract concepts, claims of reanimating corpses/zombification and symbological hallucinatory visions and time travel claims, tribal extreme superiority complexes vis-s-vis other tribal peoples and even all other nations including extreme vilification of the other tribal peoples and nations not partaking of the same primitive behaviorisms and thought processes, beliefs, rituals and traditions etc, failed prophecies and prophecies with opposite results, support of and condoned legalized forced child bride marriages, polygamy, rapes, infanticide, willful killing of foreigners as sacrificial offerings to their tribal Yahweh-Jehovah deity, genocides, ethnic cleansing, slavery, cannibalism, murders, etc, the complete lack of contemporary written evidences of events and characters but importantly also the known and verified contradictory opposite information and historical evidences, the adapted and borrowed older Mesopotamian, Zoroastrian, Egyptian and other Levant area religion’s abstract concepts, beliefs, traditions, fables, characters and rituals etc and so on. And since all three so-called “Abrahamic religions” largely derive from the same mythological characters and fables sources, then there’s really no need for me to go far in-depth about each one separately, because if the oldest original written sources are debunked and proven to be wrong, contradictory and in error, then so everything afterwards claiming a direct linear theological or traditional continuity is de facto also wrong and fake and fictional mythologies. Since all the Moses character fables and Genesis accounts fables etc came after the supposed Abraham character (even though they are purportedly and claimed as the source of the earlier stories) and were mostly adapted and borrowed Mesopotamian legends anyway, then all that related material is dealt with simultaneously also, and so likewise later offshoot cults and sects movements are also directly affected and debunked (e.g. – if you prove Bigfoots are fables, faked and just legends fiction then by automatic default the later claimed UFO reptilian zombie Bigfoots bloodline from Atlantis who ascended to planet Nibiru are then also fabricated fictional hogwash, claiming Bigfoots historicity and being connected to them then is easily refuted and proven to be just invented imaginary fabulism by using simple deductive reasoning). Just like falling dominoes, it doesn’t matter if using invented obscurantist fabulist mental gymnastics to make the dominoes go straight, over stairs, under chairs and tables and zigzagging around corners to fit in the dominoes narrative to wow the feeble-minded, if you debunk-knock over just the first original error-fiction domino or any of the early ones then the rest naturally also likewise fall down by the laws of motion, probability and cause and effect (that’s the way science, common sense and gravity works, it’s not hocus pocus demons, talking snakes magic, satan angels shenanigans or holy ghosts knocking them over), and so the entire claimed domino narrative continuity actually disintegrated very early on already, and you can’t just pretend they didn’t fall and instead believe “with faith” that they’re still actually really standing when they’re clearly not (well you could but then you’d be using ostrich effect self-deceit confirmation bias and be just plain ol’ delusional and just another Ken Ham basically, example above.
Heck, I’m probably helping to save your eternal soul from the eternal fire burning worms and pitchforks by giving you this important information, so you don’t thank the wrong God. You see, the biblical sources and religions of the ancient Levant, Canaan and Middle East already had “Gods” with personal names in 2000 BCE and all the way up to the 4th century CE. They weren’t writing in a Germanic language using a pagan meaning and origins name in 2000 BCE, 1000 BCE or even 300 CE, so there’s absolutely no way that any deity in the Hebrew and Christian bible or Koran can correctly be called “God” or known as a God, the God or just any God period. When a Christian, Jew or Muslim uses the word “God” in the English language, they are talking about completely different things and beliefs and each of those “Gods” has a name, they are so different in fact that the word “God” suddenly becomes meaningless, like an illusion, unproductive, pointless and ineffectual and basically without any relevance, you’re just fooling yourself like saying “Cloud”, “Mountain” or “Rainbow”, you might as well say Mickey Mouse or Scooby Doo. (“Oh my Cloud what a beautiful painting!”, “Oh Mountain this wine tastes so good” or “Thank Rainbow it’s Friday!”…). In a nutshell, it would be impossible for any of them to be a “”God” because all of them already had their own personal Semitic languages names which were used and recorded in stone and in scrolls and papyrus and are used even today, the various “Gods” in the fables let their personal names be known that they wanted to be addressed by and known as. (Jehovah-Yahweh, Allah, El/Elohim etc and sop on). So saying just “God” is preposterous and anti-biblical actually. It would be like calling a deity today by the name of Merovich, Marcomir, Branimir, Gatsby, Fred, Ted or G-Crew Fresh Base because these words/names weren’t used either. It would be like calling a deity “mouse”, well what mouse? which mouse? what kind of mouse? Micky Mouse? Jerry Mouse? There’s lots of different mice after all and they can’t all be “the” one and only “Mighty Mouse”. Besides, how can any Abrahamic religion claim that they have the so-called “Real God” and are worshipping a one true deity? That’s preposterous and bonkers absurd!…
…As an analogy, suppose the religion’s “God” is a “Cola”, how can that religion’s “Cola-God” brand be the only super-duper correct only one and claimed to be the most perfect awesome smartest “Cola-God” brand master of the universe?, especially with all the contradictions, errors and repeated failures and predictions turning out wrong? Do you know just how many cola brands there are in the world? Lots and lots and lots of them that’s how many (see Cola brands). So it’s absurd to think that one’s “Cola-God” viewpoint is above all other types of “Cola-God” religions and cults and sects and definitions, and that the term “Cola-God” only means your version or idea as the hypothetical only “Cola-God” brand that exists. There’s just no way possible to say “Cola-God” and imply that only just that religion/cult/sect has the right to define and claim superiority “Cola-God” term usage and meaning, or that when someone says “Cola-God” they must be talking about your “Cola-God” brand definition and religion, especially when it’s been proven wrong repeatedly and shown with evidence to be just another invented “Cola-God” brand like all the rest and that there are numerous “Cola/God” brands and viewpoints floating around and have been for many thousands of years. You can use the word if you want, but at least now you’ll know that the real meaning behind and origins of this English language word “God” (just like “Bog”, “Boh” and “Buh”), is quite simply not a name or correct form of addressing the deity but is rather of ancient Pagan origins and has absolutely nothing to with the bible, torah, koran or with any Bronze Age and Iron Age Semitic and Levant desert tribal deity.
Probably surprising to many and unkown to most, the only character in the entire biblical material that clearly states they are the only one that creates evil is…god. And you can’t deny what’s written and unequivocally implied, I kid you not… Isaiah 45: 7…..”I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the lord do all these things”. When this fact is kept in mind then many events that take place in the biblical universe stories and fables make much more sense.
Oh yeah, besides the Canaanite god El already mentioned, and the name Elohim first used in the Hebrew bible/Old Testament Genesis story narrative, there are actually at least 16 official “names of god” used (but even many more than that). Interestingly one of them is “Adonai” which again has plural meanings just like “Elohim” is plural. Adonai, which is used about 450 times, was also used by the ancient Phoenicians as a title for Tammuz/Dumuzid their ancient Mesopotamian god associated with shepherds and it’s even mentioned in the Epic of Gilgamesh (circa. 2100 BCE)…BUT NONE OF THE NAMES USED IN THE OLD TESTAMENT/BIBLE IS THE WORD/NAME…”GOD”. How’s that for interesting and weird? God has so many names that can be used according to the stories and written sources and they’re names he even personally wants to be known and called by, but nobody uses them, choosing to instead opt for the pagan origins and meanings word “God”, LOL. So knowing this, that people, and especially televangelists, wrongly use the pagan origins word “god” instead of his/its real name that he said was his/its name, then you might as well just call him Mo and insert the word “Mo” everywhere you see the word God written in this post (Mo or Curly, Shemp, Larry, Jeb, Judy, Dave, Bill or whatever name you choose). Actually every person you know who has a name, just call them “Mo” because it’s the same difference. Oh sure people will say “Are you a blithering dumbass pointless stooge? my name is Jeb/Judy (or whatever name they are), why the hell do you keep calling me “Mo!?”. If someone sneezes just say “Mo bless you” etc. If you find yourself on a sinking ship or a plane that is in danger of falling from the sky, then “God help us!” may be the incorrect phrase to say and could actually make things worse, that’s just some supplementary information.
“MO ON THE GO!”…the lying shitbag conman says it’s the one and only best and cheapest text and prayer line to know the word of God Mo ever, so you’d be crazy not to (Click Now for them secret words of Mo, see above for more about that).
So again, we see it’s basically all one big god-o-tainment biz shtick selling suspension of disbeliefs, made up stories and drivel, trinkets and bric a brac and then more made up groundless stories solely for their own personal gain and personal universe. It’s infomercials just without the monthly seed faith gifts. There are no television miracles and no god or angels or heavenly beings are speaking to anybody because it’s just the televangelist entertainment scheme-biz. Here’s just one more example of many, many more examples. The practice of snakehandling and of drinking strychnine and other poisons, found in a few offshoots of Pentecostalism in the southern American states and a few other places, and their Biblical support in Mark 16:18:…”…they will pick up snakes with their hands; and when they drink deadly poison, it will not hurt them at all; they will place their hands on sick people, and they will get well.” But here’s something most people don’t know, that the 2 earliest manuscripts and some other later texts do not have verses 9–20 and there’s no mention about any snake handling or poison drinking etc, (or the demon exorcising or the speaking in jibberish tounges either, the earliest extant complete manuscripts of Mark, Codex Sinaiticus and Codex Vaticanus and other 4th-century manuscripts, do not contain the last twelve verses, 16:9–20), those verses were just added later and nobody knows who added them (some unknown anonymous writers somewhere added them so I guess it must be true?). This is a common theme throughout the whole bible, stuff just being anonymously added and changed and taken away then added again, meanings changed and new abstract concepts added etc, etc for centuries. Well then why don’t these types drink the poisons then? (Anybody can do jibberish meaningless tongues, grunts and whistling, and the fake demon possessions is easier than riding a bike). Could it be because so many have died and were bitten by snakes? Could that have something to do with it? Is that why televangelists have to fake healing people and put on fake healing and lip-flapping shows? Why don’t the faith healers handle snakes and/or drink poisons also then like the text says? They don’t trust God then?….Exactly. That also shows that they are of little faith…”Oh you of little faith televangelists, drink the poison and handle poisonous snakes so that you may live and maketh abundance of harvests unto Zion!” I say.
Don’t have a major malfunction, read your bible and Nostradamus people and that’s the truth.
Well one thing is for sure, there’s not going to be a Red Lobster restaurant or Hard Rock Cafe or spare ribs and bacon cheeseburgers on the menus, will there be Tonkatsu though? that’s a good question so we’ll have to search the bible and Nostradamus for the answer.
Jack Van Impe and Rexella always with their fabulist mythomania mental gymnastics filth stories and wrong for the 1001st time for St. Jehoshaphat’s Cripe’s Pete’s sake, they can’t get it right and Mo is not impressed (and you call yourself god’s prophets? you’re pathetic and obtuse). For preaching bullshit fraudsters with net worths from 10s of millions to over 300 million dollars personal net worth and expecting a rapture any day, they sure do write lots of books and are constantly making wrong predictions (If it was ancient Israel Old Testament times they would have been stoned to death a long, long time ago not many people know that).
TOTALLY NOT A CULT. Dreams from Lord Thanos are always real, every single one of them at all times (Run to the hills while you still can! Lord Thanos is coming with his locusts with cow’s feet and full of eyeballs with his trumpets and golden harps! Then he’s gonna let loose the winged seven-headed with ten horns beast with bear’s feet out of the Sea of Japan with his bowls to torment people with lambs that have dragon voices! His trumpeters on horses will become lion-headed scorpions deceiving many, 200 miles of blood up to the horse’s bridles people! Put on your rubber boots and run to your tabernacle and don’t forget your scrolls, grapes and oil lamps! But don’t run to the Euphrates river though because it will be full of swords, sailors, seals and multitudes of winepresses…40 newspapers and gargoyles wow!!!…For Cripe’s Pete’s Jehoshapht’s sake Run!!!). I recommend wearing headphones for the full effect of them Yahwehism-Jehovahism holy ghost righteous gospel choir beats.
The assumption for the average reader is that this order of the Gospels is a chronological one, when in fact it is a theological one. Scholars and historians are universally agreed that Mark is the earliest Gospel–by several decades at least, and the others used it as the basis for their versions, much later given the names Matthew, Luke and John, even though nobody knows who wrote them because they’re all based on papyrus scraps mostly written in Greek, not Hebrew or Aramaic which was the languages spoken at the time, and by several anonymous writers at different times in different geographical areas, not just one writer. They were all written in Greek, including Mark, but we don’t know who wrote any of them. Even Mark is a name later given to the text but we don’t know the real author(s). And this insight turns out to have profound implications for people’s understanding of the “Jesus story” and how it was passed down in New Testament Gospel traditions and mutated over time with much more added material, again all done by anonymous writers.
God Said It…I Believe It…That Settles It!…Hello, I’m a fraud, pleased to meet you, can I interest you in some made-up bullshit?
The problem with the Gospel of Mark for the fnal editors of the New Testament was that it was grossly deficient and lacking, (whoever first wrote it whatever their name was), it didn’t include lots of information that was added later. First it is significantly shorter than the other Gospels – with only 16 chapters compared to Matthew (28), Luke (24) and John (21). But more important is how Mark begins his Gospel and how he ends it…
Telescamvangelists always claim that the Bible is without error or contain false information because it’s all inspired by god and so it’s the perfect word of god, is this true? If it was the true written words (inspired?) by a perfect being, then it must not contradict itself ever not even once. However as a collection of books written by different anonymous writers at different times and edited and re-edited over many centuries, it’s actually full of contradictions as well as wrong information and illogical information, including wrong time and chronological histories, wrong geographies, wrong biology, astronomy and natural world information, just very wrong all throughout the books. And that’s not even getting into the numerous theological contradictions and errors and nonsensical fables and characters, (they contradict each other in theological ways and with different information that often demonstrates they are deliberately arguing with each other), so to remedy these very problematic conundrums televangelists resort to their only remaining weapon and brainwashing modus operandi, known quite simply in the vernacular as “cherry picking” (aka “cherry picking logical fallacy”). In anutshell, by using fabulist mental gymnastics and only selecting and presenting verses or text that support a particular view or position to the audience, while at the same time withholding any contradictory and evidence against the position, the more withheld contradictory information and evidence then the more flawed and fallacious the argument and position, by cherry picking text and avoiding contradictory and erroneous text/information the scamvangelist-preacher chicanery and subterfuge can then present anything they want as being word of god true and perfect, just like having a ventriloquist dummy saying exactly what you want (then usually just topped off with some other made up stuff for some golly gee wow factor and better faith seeds and harvests of course).
…The Gospel of Mark is the earliest version by many decades at least, BUT it has no account of the virgin birth of Jesus, or for that matter any birth of Jesus story at all. In fact, Joseph, husband of Mary, is never named in Mark’s Gospel at all, and Jesus is simply called a “son of Mary”, Jesus is just a character who never at any time equates himself to any god, there is no Lazarus raised from the dead and many other things are not there that were only added later. (There is however very clear indications even from the words attributed to the character of Jesus that what the reader is actually reading is just a new offshoot mystery religion/cult and mythicism being spread…he speaks contradictory parables to confuse the listener (and reader) specifically so that people will NOT understand what he is saying with even his very own disciples not understanding his words/meanings, cultic allegories, Pythagoras and Jesus parallels (153 fish, the Pythagorean “measure of the fish” mathematics and Pythagorus’ fishermen disciples) all pointing towards Jesus being a composite mythic character, etc). But even more significant is Mark’s strange ending. He has absolutely no appearances of the Jesus character following the visit of the women on Easter morning to the empty tomb! Nothing. (and no mention of books, seed faiths or gospel music either). Like the other three later Gospels, Mark’s version recounts the visit of Mary Magdalene and her companions to the tomb of Jesus early Sunday morning (Again different named women and number of women in each gospel). And upon arriving they find the blocking stone at the entrance of the tomb removed, and it is only a young man (notice in the story – it’s not an angel, it’s just an unknown man, he doesn’t say he’s an angel and the women don’t recognize him as such, who was going to move the stone? and no zapped asleep Roman soldier guards either) and he then, according to the “story”, supposedly tells them: “Do not be alarmed. You seek Jesus of Nazareth, who was crucified. He has risen; he is not here. See the place where they laid him. But go, tell his disciples and Peter that he is going before you to Galilee. There you will see him, just as he told you.” And they went out and fled from the tomb, for trembling and astonishment had seized them, and they said nothing to anyone. (Mark 16:6-8)…
When it comes to fake raising the dead resurrection miracles/zombieism, all I can say is hallelujah, amen and glory be. (Later I’ll get more into the topic of what a recently risen from the dead zombie person should be served for breakfast, lunch or dinner).
…And there the frst original oldest gospel story simply ends! That’s it. End of story. That’s all there is folks. I kid you not, the oldest frst primary gospel story has the women leave and say nothing to anybody and closing credits. There is no magical after death zombie appearances to anybody at all ever. To add even more contradictions, the other later gospel versions also changed Galilee (in the north) to Jerusalem (in the south), proving again that they are just later theological written versions, especially the so-called Matthew version which later superceded the original oldest Mark version. The even later contradictory and fictitious Acts/Epistles attributed to someone named Paul, it even many times supercedes all 4 gospels and all he did was have an hallucination, according to the story narrative, and he never saw anything or anyone but afterwards just kept getting into arguments with people everywhere he went by babbling his made up abstract concepts nonsense. In the story even the supposed original disciples disliked him considering him some strange recently joined guru because he considered himself closer to the Jesus character than even them and strangely Paul even regarded the disciples as false Christians and dimwits, and this even though he never met any Jesus and didn’t know anything about him or whether he was even born or walked the earth, he had absolutely no knowledge about any earthly existence of any Jesus character life, or miracles or any preaching mission or words/parables spoken and only got his information from a vision/hallucination but mostly OT text and that’s it, go figure, now that sure is weird. Peter especially was in conflict with Paul with them arguing about who’s in the right and knows Jesus best. The blowup between Paul and Peter was a total failure and Paul soon left Antioch as persona non grata, never again to return. Yep, seems like a really smooth and friendly agreeing brotherhood of holy preaching special somethings mission with no theologies issues getting in the way by the very first founders and most important gurus apostles from the very start.
The oldest Gospel Mark gives absolutely no accounts of anyone at all ever seeing any Jesus character as the much later Matthew, Luke, and John versions “report anonymously”. In fact, this Mark gospel is contradictory in many instances from the other gospel versions. (which also contradict each other numerous times and contradict themselves also, just like much of the Old Testament/Hebrew Bible also). The oldest original Mark gospel, whoever anonymously wrote it in classical Greek, contains absolutely no mention about any snakehandling, poison drinking, jibberish tongues lip-flapping, there’s absolutely no angel in any tomb but just a man, there’s no lightning hitting temples, there’s no Lazarus zombie story, there’s no hundreds of dead people rising out of their graves and zombily walking around the city being seen by many, but most interestingly, there’s also no nativity scene story or even any information about a birth, and there’s absolutely no after death appearances by any Jesus character to anyone at all ever, until the later 3 gospels versions that is, who we again also have absolutely no clue who wrote them or precisely where or when either, just only that it was centuries after the narriative stories were “alleged” to have happened and then changing and mutating over time with much added and changed material (None of them of course ever allude to any seeds, books, miracle oils, fake healing crusades, fake miracles, bacon dancing and babbling jibberish, mailing faith seed envelopes and all that other smoke and mirrors made up fiction stories and new competing weird abstract concepts and theologies)…
God Said It…I Believe It…That Settles It…In ancient times there sure were lots of magical creatures to choose from (but they forgot the talking donkey though, and that Ezekiel’s winged 4-headed thing of a man, a lion, an ox and an eagle all covered in eyes), and cool supernatural miracles and floating things, spirits, important sacrifices voodoo blood magic, cool witches and of course plenty lots of demon possessions all over the place. Heck it seems that back then you couldn’t walk into any town or village or go down any pathway or road without bumping into demon-possessed people all over the place and people possesed by demons was as common as people with bad breath today or the common cold, it’s too bad it all stopped in 1837. I know what you’re probably thinking…“But why would Frodo go to Mount Doom unless Gandalf was real?”. In a way with all the odd story plots and twists, gnostic and deliberate obscurantism, irrational cultish deliriums, suspension of disbelief, contradictions galore and rambling/blithering characters, narratives and themes and the odd wierd and disturbing things being said and done for nonsensical absurd reasons by the characters and superheroes, it’s almost like a Neil Breen movie except with less whining, trumpets, lamps, sacrifices, smitings, lepers and plagues etc (in a way it actually really is a Neil Breen movie when you think about it, except it’s set in the Middle East thousands of years ago with equally awful actors and boring pointless plots, it’s true).
And since on the topic, it’s interesting to note that many scholars think that the ancient Croatian god “Triglav” (meaning 3-headed), could very well well have been an early influence on the very concept of the later Christian “Trinity” belief, Triglav was usually depicted as a three-headed man who was a fusion of three other major gods consisting of Perun, Svarog and Dazhbog, and at times incorporating Svetovid or Veles as one of the three. According to later written material by Ebbo (775-851) he was believed to represent sky, earth and the underworld and he ruled these kingdoms. Triglav, and others, were also part of deity pantheons found in other nations such as Czechia, Slovakia, Poland, Slovenia, Russia, Ukraine, Belarus, Lithuania, Latvia, Estonia etc, written material and oral legends point to them being present and worshipped at the time that Croat tribes were known as the Veneti/Venethi/Venedi, even today there are still many toponyms, place names and organizations named after Triglav, and the others (Interestingly, many biblical scholars and theolgians believe these gods may very well be the real gods and perhaps alluded to as the plural Elohim, also supporting this view is the fact that not one contradictory piece of information, evidence or quote has been attributed to them in any written records ever and that they are never mentioned as demanding or requiring desert blood magic rituals, so they may just be waiting and watching patiently in the background and then suddenly appear to clean house and defeat the nefarious puny desert tribal Yahweh-Jehovah demiurge god once and for all at some future appointed time). Image: lastavica.hr.
God Said It…I Believe It…That Settles It…Just what the heck sort of desert voodoo blood magic witchcraft is this anyway? It’s really weird why scientists and doctors don’t use biblical sources for curing diseases and ailments but instead use unbiblical “doctor witchcraft”, I mean c’mon, it’s God telling you the right way to do things and that’s the way it must be done, he knows best after all not pharmaceutical sorcerers and diabolical doctor witches cults (who knows better about treating leprosy? the vastly most wise smartest master of the universe…or unbelieving infidel pharmacy heresy gurus?). Like I said, to know what you’re talking about people really need to go back and examine the various earliest sources, the languages used and written at the times, by and for whom, why, when and where and of course real history and not just make stuff up or believe anything, otherwise it’s just pointless babbling and anybody can do that. I know many millions have been cured of leprosy by science and pharmacy witches, as for the above biblical method I’ll have to look into it and then update this post.
Actually the above special “God’s Secret Recipe For Curing Leprosy” isn’t quite complete, the entire recipe consists of…
1 – Get 2 birds, cedar, scarlet yarn and hyssop.
2 – Kill 1 bird over running water in a clay pot.
3 – Dip live bird and stuff in blood and sprinkle 7 times generously on person (to be performed outside of the camp).
4 – Release surviving bloody bird.
5 – On the 7th day, person must wash their clothes, shave all their hair (including eye brows, pubes, arms, legs etc) and then take a bath.
6 – Person to then live as an exile not allowed into their tent for a week.
7 – Afterwards on the 8th day, get 2 young male lambs and 1 ewe, all must be without defects, along with the finest flour mixed with olive oil for a grain offering, and one log of the oil, animals must be declared clean by the priest in front of the tent (deemed clean and absolutely no defects on the animals, very important).
8 – Priest then to kill 1 of the male lambs, then sprinkle blood and paint blood dots on the person (ear lobe, big toe, thumb, hand).
9 – Priest then to sprinkle the oil 7 times.
10 – Priest then to paint oil dots on the person on top of the previous blood dots (ear lobe, big toe etc).
11 – Priest then to put remaining oil on the person’s head.
12 – Priest to then sacrifice and burn the other offerings along with a grain offering.
13 – Presto Magico the leper is healed, it’s a miracle! (if leper can’t afford lambs and ewe then proceed to God’s Leprosy Cure Recipe commanded alternate version which substitutes with pigeons and doves for the lamb and ewe).
…This would be like watching a modern day remake of a film from the 1920’s or 1930’s, it would be like watching a modern day version of the Wizard of Oz film because you’ve never seen it, and then deciding to watch the first original film. Then afterwards wondering where the heck is that part where Dorothy is born in a Kansas barn, and the 3 mayors of Chicago, Miami and Los Angeles bring apple pies? Where the heck is that part where the Wizard has a ninja sword fight against the Witch and turns her flying monkey soldiers into frogs? Where the heck is that part where Dorothy and Toto die and then come back to life? Where’s all the dogs and cats rising from their graves and then zombily running around the city seen by many? etc and so on. This first original Wizard of Oz film doesn’t have any of that stuff. Why not? (Importantly also, where’s the cabbage rolls? How come no one is eating cabbage rolls or stuffed peppers with mashed potatoes? Why the heck are there no cabbage rolls, sausages or cheese štrukli?). The simple fact is that the later 3 “anonymous gospels” scraps used the oldest one (just given the name Mark later) as the source and then they just added more stories not found in “Mark”, adding zombies coming out of the ground all over the places (many undead zombies now walking around Jerusalem “seen by many” wow), adding 1 “angel” now instead of just the man, even later adding 2 “angels” in another gospel, and then just topping it all off with more “appearances” and more contradictory stories that the original didn’t have. It’s pretty easy to see what went on, basically that many people in Jerusalem simply didn’t like talking or writing about eyewitnessing zombies walking around, because they found it boring and not newsworthy obviously.
These days starting your own new jimble jamble religion with your own invented ideas, rules, concepts, definitions, special magical characters, universe, realities and obscure meanings is so easy with so many lackeys and feeble-minded supporters ready to applaud that even you could do it.
The above pastor is just one of many examples of the absurd subversives spreading lies and delusional fiction, just to sound important to themselves and so you’ll send them money and buy their stuff and read their books. Even modern day science, paleontology and especially genetic DNA evidences categorically prove that the ancestors of a large part of the African populations had in fact genetically interbred by inter-species mating with another unknown species of archaic hominin that was separate from modern humans species and which went extinct only about 12,000 years ago, it is thought by some scientists to most likely be a variation or subspecies of Homo erectus, a separate and archaic African branch who’so offspring can even be found today and is shown in their DNA pool. Quite simply the pastor babbling about sending your last $1000 to him as a seed faith gift is not part of any Adam & Eve family, not any Noah or imaginary Noah’s family and not even The Addams Family, the Family Ties television show family or The Partridge Family or any other fictitious family. He’s confused and absurd and doesn’t even know reality, you put seeds in the ground to grow not dollar bills, just a plain ol’ subversive guru looking to control peoples minds and wallets. After all, we know these days thanks to science and the quest for truth, that the planet wasn’t populated only just around 2500 BCE from one family coming out of a boat, We know there were a number of different archaic humanoid populations in different parts of the planet at different times whose descendents are around even today, we know that there were Neanderthals, we know there were Cro-Magnon populations in Eurasia also and even other kinds of humanoids in different parts of the planet, (new and different humanoid beings remains and evidences are being discovered regularly) as well as archaic bipedal creatures, hominins and also monkeys, apes and various squirrels, wombats and snakes. Instead we know there were dinosaurs roaming the planet for hundreds of millions of years until about 66 million years ago, (but not any talking snakes or squirrels or wombats) and now we even have out of place artifacts, archaeological and fossil evidences of extreme human antiquity going back well before the Mesopotamian Garden of Eden story origins. The simple fact is that not one person on this planet is descended from or is part of any made up family lineage from some fictitious old bearded guy who was told by any voice to build any boat. The boat family origins scenario story is all suspension of disbelief in some people’s heads and is actually just one chapter in the subversive propaganda cult books modus operandi, used by them to help control peoples minds and instill filth based fiction realities while simultaneously taking your money.
*Intermission*
This is just one of the many primitive behaviorisms, warped and deranged examples among many demented examples in the OT. And what a great dad, if you like having a psychotic mental tribal deity cultist for a dad, and in this case nobody even tried to stop him or talk some common sense reason to him, even his creepy genie-god didn’t intervene unlike for good ol’ Abraham (btw she accepted her fate without complaining and didn’t even try to run away escape so she burned up real good well done and crispy (Oh loyal righteous Jephthah! GLO-RY Praizzze Gawd! Praizzze his name whatever his name is). Which reminds me, why can’t telescamvangelists today show such righteous faith and obedience to the lord? as in if 10 million dollars in faith-seeds are raised before the next quarter that they will sacrifice the first thing that comes out of the house to greet them. Now that would show true holy righteous obedience faithfulness to the lord and increase treasures in heaven and sell more books, they’d be crazy not to show such loyal faithfulness.
That Hosea prophet guru guy he sure was holy, he and the Yahweh-Jehovah God sure made up a “Great Team”, lol. In Hosea 9:14, after being upset that the people and especially the Ephraim tribe were installing their own chosen princes and kings decided from the people instead of “god-approved princes and kings” (whatever that means, I guess Hosea approved or something like that), Hosea then supposedly says…”Give them, Lord – what will you give them? Give them wombs that miscarry and breasts that are dry….Ephraim is blighted, their root is withered, they yield no fruit. Even if they bear children, I will slay their cherished offspring…the roar of battle will rise against your people, so that all your fortresses will be devastated – as Shalman devastated Beth Arbel on theday of battle, when mothers were dashed to the ground with their children. So will it happen to you, Bethel, because your wickedness is great. When that day dawns, the king of Israel will be completely destroyed..”. Yikes! Hosea is a really hardcore politician too by even asking Yahweh-Jehovah to send miscarriages and dry breasts on them all to depopulate them and snuff them out, and then dash any remaining mothers and children to the ground to their deaths by invaders, that’s even his own people he’s cursing and talking about here and not enemies. Yikes! that sure is holy that’s for sure asking god to miscarriage all thewomen and have dry breats and being dashed to death along with their children, Hosea is often described as a “prophet of doom” because of his many prophecies against Israel (but his name Hosea means ‘salvation’, ‘he saves’ or ‘he helps’ in Hebrew which sure is strange, it’s a good thing he didn’t decide to “help” the Chinese, Japanese, Indians and Native peoples because that would have been a lot more miscarriages probably), good ol’ holy Hosea and Yahweh-Jehovah god what a really, really, really great team that’s for sure.
Thou shalt not kill??? Oh you mean just don’t kill your own people, village, oxen, babies and slave owners, but it’s still open season and ok to kill other peoples because it’s a loophole or just yet another biblical allegory or metaphor, well alright then. Large parts of the OT are nothing but blood-hungry killfests and smitings, and again why always with all the ox, sheep, cattle and asses too? They’re infidel gentile cattle abominations?
The Joshua character and his army in the Hebrew bible is known for carrying out brutal (and I mean brutal) military ethnic cleansing and murder campaigns including infanticide (including ripping apart pregnant women to kill the unborn children) to completely destroy the Hittites, Amorites, Canaanites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites and many other native peoples already living in ancient Canaan on his God’s orders even, as their story goes anyway, so why is everyone upset with ISIS when they’re the same Abrahamic religion (all part of the same great Abrahamic religions god team), basically using the same playbook and plays, they’re modern day Joshuas basically. (and weirder still why would Christians and Muslims try to co-opt all these various characters, actions and events as somehow being their own also? Deranged much? And how come they never make movies about Joshua and his generals and successors and all their amazing military and magic exploits?
Although these days there’s even bible action figures toys, which actually just adds to the fiction characters ambiance, besides even just this Joshua toy action figure is sort of creepy, shouldn’t they be more descriptive on the package like…”That’s right kids, Kill men, women, children and slaughter babies fresh out of stomachs for the mighty glorious Lord just like good ol’ Joshua, Don’t forget to Collect All Six!” (I can just see it now…”Happy birthday Billy enjoy your present, you can go play with it in the backyard after dinner, just use your sister’s dolls to be the Canaanites, glory!”). And when you really think about it according to many of the facts we now know, the Joshua character and his alleged killing and military exploits would have then just made him a precursor to the much later Muhamud, which really isn’t all that surprising.
♫♪♪♬…Gimme ♪ that ol’ ♬ time religion ♫ ♩♩♫…
God Said It…I Believe It…That Settles It as the mantra goes…That’s what you get for doctoring-witchcraft on the sabbath you heretical infidel gentiles being all disobedient.
More about this farcical story about holy deceit and Esau later, who was also the very first documented case of a Sasquatch you’ll see (and yep, it’s the same Jacob mentioned earlier who beat god during that all-night wrestling match in the desert).
Well, he is a genocidal murderous lying nutcase desert tribal deity and he was easily duped by a talking snake in his very own garden, so obviously not something deserving worship or trust or to believe in. And it seems jesus’ dad on top of that had some major smiting, anger and control issues probably (luckily these days though if you get on his good side you can get front row tickets to the 700 Club or Kenneth Copeland shows etc, and if you really get on his good side you can win a Golden Globe award, get cured of migraines or even score the game-winning goal Glo-Ry!). But isn’t it strange that it didn’t smitefully promise burning revenge against the Japanese who were most assuredly eating abomination shellfish at the time, as well as against the Hyperboreans who were also without a doubt eating pork tenderloin and bacon abominations at the time.
♫♪♪♬…Gimme ♪ that ol’ ♬ time religion ♫ ♩♩♫… So let me get this straight, this god’s handpicked fave peep superhero gave promises about having freedom and new homes in a paradise land flowing with milk and honey, but now you’re just wandering around in the desert heat constantly year after year after year with no end in sight, and if you start to complain about the situation or want answers to some questions then immediately god angrily sends down fire from the sky to destroy you? Sure why not? you gotta keep the absurdity continuum going after all for the zany action and suspense, lol.
It basically comes down to believing actual real Dinosaur bones fossils along with the known paleontological and geological evidences, or believing in imaginary characters, visions stories and fables written by anonymous primitive thinking desert tribal writers during the Bronze and Iron Ages in the Levant area. One of them has the real verified news scoop proofs and one of them is blatantly lying.
♫♪♪♬…Gimme ♪ that ol’ ♬ time religion ♫ ♩♩♫… With a history having so much “God-Commanded” destruction, mass murdering, genocides, infanticides, child sacrificing, sanctified rapes, condoned slavery and cannibalism, plagues, stonings, other sacrificings, beheadings, burnings and much more various holy smitings, including even today, then just why the heck do some people call it the “Holy Land” exactly? What’s up with that? Says who and are they on cheap drugs? Probably, why isn’t everyone trying to move to this so-called “Holy Land” of “Flowing Milk and Honey” then? Or why would anyone even decide to leave the “Holy Land” in the first place just to go to infidel gentile lands anyway because it’s the frikin Holy Land after all so it’s “God’s country”, it would be just plain ol’ foolishness to leave god’s country. Based on what we know from sources about the beliefs and customs of ancient Pagan Croatian tribes in antiquity, their deities pantheon, families, society traditions and social structure, heck even from remains evidences about the lives and societies lived by cavemen during the Ice Age, makes them seem like aristocratic nobles by comparison to all these absurd Abrahamic religions theologies and histories.
God Said It…I Believe It…That Settles It…The Hebrew bible god openly commanded that foreign children and babies be murdered and slaughtered even in the womb along with their mothers. You’re just gosh darn dang lucky you weren’t living during Joshua’s time you pointless infernal diabolical puny infidel gentile Gerber baby or you’d be going down! Darn dang lucky, but they were slaughtered real good, and like the televangelists would say “Oh thank you righteous obedient good ol’ Joshua and his mighty warriors, the faith harvest seeds have been multiplied Praizzze Gawd GLO-RY!!!” (alternate caption: “Please don’t kill and slaughter me Joshua and mighty holy Yahweh-Jehovah warriors of righteousness, I was just born yesterday and I’m hungry”).
After thwarting both Two-Face and Riddler as well as defeating Darkseid all in only 40 days, Batman had to teach the Boy Wonder a real bible lesson because he was confused and erroneously thought that Bronze Age and Iron Age desert blood magic, Zoroastrian, Egyptian, Mesopotamian and Canaanite religion’s abstract concepts and astrotheology, lurking demons, primitive cosmic and natural world views, risen zombies and hocus pocus magic powers fables were actually truth and real, after this episode Batman parted ways and worked solo starring in many films. Also, to be a so-called biblical literalist and/or apologist, you have to follow the example of reading comic books, it’s so simple even a 5 year old knows how to do that, i.e. – you can’t just read this and that comic book panel, skip a few panels then read a few more panels you agree with and then skip some more panels going back and forth all over the place using that system, reading only the panels you like or agree with then making up the rest and not even read all the panels which tell the story, what sort of a scoundrel fabulist charlatan would read a comic book like that? Who would even make a superhero movie based on reading their comic book that way? Exactly, to know how to properly understand the presented information/claims you have to first at least know how to read a comic book properly, ipso facto.
♫♪♪♬…Gimme ♪ that ol’ ♬ time religion ♫ ♩♩♫… 500 wives I could understand, even 600 or 676 wives, but 700 wives!? (plus an extra 300 for some fun on the side), Is that why it’s called the 700 Club Pat Robertson?
Well that sure is weird, so a few guys took a quick sneak peek look into a box to see some rocks basically, so then right away their god kills over 50,000 people as retribution, yep that sure is weird. And there doesn’t seem to be any hocus pocus going on or come across as irrational, unreasonable or extreme. It’s also weird with all that lamenting business again, actually most of the OT is just various lamenting come to think of it, really, when it’s not smiting this or smiting that then it’s lamenting this and lamenting that and lamenting all over the place for one reason or another, that sure is weird too.
God Said It…I Believe It…That Settles It…(Don’t forget to kill all the ox, sheep, camels and asses, very important, because if you kill the camels and donkeys only then they’ll know you’re serious and mean business, killing just all the people is for amateurs, after all Jesus’ dad knows best and is the smartest of them all) GLO-RY! ♫♪♪♬…Gimme ♪ that ol’ ♬ time religion ♫ ♩♩♫…
♫♪♪♬…Gimme ♪ that ol’ ♬ time religion ♫ ♩♩♫…
The Yahweh-Jehovah god who only hangs and floats around the Levant deserts universe was really upset that this Balaam guy went on a donkey ride and so he had to miraculously intervene by sending down a satan angel to stop him (more about that later), it was probably the most important thing going on in the entire world at that time and so naturally required immediate divine intervention, he simply had to miraculously defy the laws of the universe and space and time to stop that donkey ride no matter what.
Wow, just like magic, there sure was lots of hocus pocus magic, chicanery and zombies going on back then.
It’s a good thing Televangelists and Christians weren’t around living in ancient Canaan Israel, they would have had migraines for sure, like living in the The Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant today. Without a doubt the nonsense delirium preaching John Hagee, Kenneth Copeland, Joyce Meyer and Pat Robertson etc, would have been stoned and put to death before they even knew what happened, heck they would have been whining on the ground with their arms covering their noggins from rocks and stones before even being able to burn one measly bird sacrifice.
Literally just a few sentences into the zany absurd novel and already the contradictions nonsense starts, I already mentioned this and a few of the most well known ones but there’s lots and lots and lots more contradictions. You can’t expect to sell lots of your new novel book and religion if already right at the start the authors are in a state of confused delirium and the plot disintegrates after turning the first page.
But if that wasn’t absurd enough, not long after the wowzerama fish adventure Jonah is crying whining and complaining and he literally wants to die now instead of living, yep he wants to die believe it or not, why?… because a worm that his god sent ate the plant leaves that were giving him shade from the sun so he was getting hot and probably sunstroke (is he a moron? just get up already and move to other leaves or a tree, a simpleton dumb bird would know enough to do that and they’re even literally birdbrains, talk about a pointless lazy dumbass). Also, it’s sure not a good case for historicity if this is one of the characters and stories that the Jesus character used as a historical reference to back up his claims in the gospels novels, not a good historicity evidence example at all.
…And then to make it more weird, in the first and oldest gospel of Mark, and later Matthew and Luke, (but remember these are just names applied many decades later, we have absolutely no clue who wrote these stories and letters, in Greek I should add, so very unlikely written by some illiterate fishermen hicks in ancient Palestine or even in the Middle East), the Jesus character in the narrative is not interested in teaching about himself because he’s largely secretive, very wishy-washy talking mainly in parables everywhere with even his own disciples not understanding him most of the time (didn’t they ever ask him any questions so as to clear things up?, apparently not). But when you read John’s gospel practically the only thing Jesus talks about is who he is, what his identity is, where he came from and basically telling everyone that he was God, “I AM” and saying eternal life only comes through him, (But why would the earlier written Mark and then Matthew and Luke gospels leave out this sort of important information? Hmmm?). In the John gospel he starts off his “3 year mission” by turning over the tables in the temple almost causing a massive riot in the city and having the Jewish religious authorities as sworn enemies, but the other versions have him do it last at the very end of his “1 year mission” which got him in the most serious trouble and sentenced to death. In the John gospel version his “mission” lasts 3 years, in the others it lasts only 1 year. (something sort of stinks about the whole thing, because over the centuries anonymous people just kept adding and taking away information and throwing in contradictions and personal ideas everywhere that’s why, was it a 3 year mission or 1 year mission? Televangelists want to know because their books sales and faith seeds harvests depend on it).
The “Mr Contradictions” Paul character if he even existed as portrayed in writings, which is highly unlikely according to evidences to the contrary, complete lack of substantiated evidence or proofs, the circulating forged writings in his name (even 7 of the 13 Pauline epistles are considered as not even written by Paul, and numerous other problematic conclusions by scholars, and I always wondered didn’t the people ever write back? If they wrote back then it would probably be a real person), he had some serious issues and was mostly in a perpetual state of delirium confusion in his old age, convinced of and expecting a new Jesus-God kingdom to arrive any day or any hour according to a “personal vision” and later obscure strange esoteric secrets information he believed he found in the Old Testament scriptures, (taken out of context and misrepresented as usual), that’s what happens when you stare at the sun too much and have delusions/visions of grandeur. Completely wrong all over the place and just a very boring pointles galavanting fabulist with extravagant abstract concepts not even based in reality. Then “decades later” after the destruction of the Jerusalem temple some new stories appear starting with the anonymously written so-called Mark gospel, and then appeared the anonymously written so-called Matthew and Luke gospels which plagiarized large parts of “Mark” and added and changed lots of things, then later still in the 2nd century…presto-magico a newly appearing anonymously written narrative is circulating, it’s the last one to appear and be included as official canon dogma by the new politburo church fathers, a new gospel given the name of John’s gospel, not accepted by all of them but by the ones who had the most power and influence. The so-called John gospel is a totally new thing of it’s own and doesn’t rely on or plagiarize verbatim the Mark material like the Matthew and Luke versions (aka the “synoptic” gospels, it is also generally believed that the authors behind “John” are the same authors behind the later Book of Revelations), it is a new more hardcore version with many changes, omissions, new events, new long quotes and sayings and characters, new theologies and other new material not found in the other three, but also strangely mutating even more by including a number of circulating older pagan philosophical concepts, abstract concepts and mystery schools ideas.
There are so many errors, wrong information and contradictions in Abrahamic religion’s text that there wouldn’t be enough books in the world to record them all. Regarding even just Saul/Paul, he contradicts numerous times the later quoted Jesus character who said (according to the written narrative), that he didn’t come to bring peace but a sword, that he came to break apart families and have sons and daughters rise against their fathers and mothers and vice versa, he also said that the OT Jewish laws, rules and regulations are forever and that not a letter, jot or title will be changed ever (aka Mosaic Law), as well as that he only came for the lost sheep of Israel (i.e. – not for gentiles). If that’s not problematic enough, many churches, pastors, gurus and even telescamvagelists like to quote Paul, (using only selective text and cherry picking obscurantism of course when it suits their particular agenda and faith seeds). For example:
• Jesus Says Not To Eat Meat Sacrificed to Idols, But Paul Says It Is Ok.
• Jesus Says The Law Continues (as in strictly following ALL the OT laws, rules and regulations/Mosaic Laws), But Paul Says No.
• Paul Says The Pharisees Followed The Law Rigorously, But Jesus Says They Were Lax About The Law.
• Jesus Says Salvation Initiates And Continues By Repentance From Sin and Obedience Besides Faith; Paul Says This is Heresy.
• Jesus Tells Apostles To Teach His Commands Given Prior to His Ascension While In The Flesh, But Paul Says Not To Do So.
• Paul Says Elders Are Entitled To Pay for ‘Preaching & Teaching,’ But Jesus Says No.
• Jesus Teaches There Are Only 12 Apostles Into Eternity, But Paul Adds Himself To The List As a Thirteenth.
• Paul Exhorts Celibacy, But Jesus Clearly Says It is A Choice Not Within Everyone’s Power But If They Want They Can Castrate Themselves To Become Eunuchs (If you’re up to cutting your own penis and balls off then ok go for it basically, which is actually a morbid thing to approve and not deter as well as a bad example for children to emulate, the written Jesus character clearly has serious mental issues, a fixated god complex and very obscure behaviorism patterns).
Saul, Saul why are you persecuting me? I’ll arrive any day now then you and my other risen Torah-Zombie peeps will meet me in the air and we’ll be like all floating genderless immortal and stuff and squish billions of Goys in the giant winepress and burn the rest and then rule the entire planet forever and ever, I’ll introduce you in person to Joshua, Jonah, Moses, Abraham, Ezekiel, Solomon and his 700 wives and 300 concubines, oh what great glorious fun times Paul as we’re riding all the way in a one horse open sleigh…hey (but until then I’m gonna tell you a bunch of wacky secret news scoops stuff, but only just you though because my Jerusalem disciples peeps keep screwing things up getting it all wrong, I’m gonna tell you what I really meant and you’ll straighten them out), then we’ll go to the ballet, movies at the theatre with jumbo popcorn, shred the ski slopes and then to the Jerusalem pubs and cafes for beers, bacon cheeseburgers, shrimp platters and then the Motley Crue, Def Leppard, Billy Idol and The Cult concerts and tacos and tequila afterwards Paul (but if you’re really good and a very obedient praising fearful minion then we’ll get Faster Pussycat and Van Halen to play live with 12 or 700 olive oil-dipped dancing on figs Moabite virgins and the bloody crushed skulls of the Gentile Goy nations just like the good ol’ days, then we’ll all cuddle and snuggle with good ol’ Abe, Mosey and Zeke all together at my bosom…pfff lol, see Richard Carrier video later for more about that). I tell you it’s a verily great deal Paul you can thank me later.
• Jesus Says There Is One Pastor and Teacher (Himself), But Paul Tells The Church He is a Teacher, & There Are Many Pastors and Teachers.
• Paul Says God Is The God of the Dead (Living and the Dead), But Jesus Says God Is Not The God of the Dead.
• Paul Says God Does Not Live in Temples Made of Human Hands, But Jesus Says He Does.
• Jesus says Nations Of The World Are Under Satan, But Paul Says Its Rulers Are Agents of God (Jesus character comes across as more of a Jehovah’s Witness in this instance).
• Jesus Says A Call Is Revocable, But Paul Says It Is Irrevocable.
• Jesus Says Some Are Righteous, But Paul Says It Is Impossible.
• Paul Teaches We Are Eternally Secure, But Jesus Teaches Insecurity to a Sinning Believer.
• Paul Teaches In Original Sin But Jesus Contradicts.
• Paul Denies Obedience Grants Any Righteousness Unto Life, But Jesus & Exodus 20:6 Both Says It Does.
• Jesus Sends The Apostles to Baptize, But Paul Says Jesus Did Not Send Him to Baptize.
• Jesus Says Only the Merciful Receive Mercy, But Paul Says Only Those God Chooses Arbitrarily Will Receive Mercy.
• Paul Says Salvation Does Not Depend Upon Exertion, But Jesus Says It Does.
• Paul Says He Could Be Justified of The Sin that Never Could be Justified under the Law given Moses (Blasphemy), but Jesus says to the contrary that it is The Unpardonable Sin.
• Paul Says Flesh will not inherit the Kingdom of God, but Jesus in Flesh ascended to heaven supposedly, and he promised to resurrect bodies likewise to the Kingdom of the New Jerusalem, giving the same physical resurrection that Jesus had, which will include numerous zombies rising from graves.
The true “Origins of Christianity” according to source text internal evidence, sequence of evidence, empirical data and known historical facts is that it was just yet another failed Jewish apocalyptic sect centered around Yahwehism-Jehovahism failed prophecies and the preceding Bronze Age and Iron Age cultural milieu incorporating primitive desert Blood Magic behaviorisms.
For someone who, according to gospels novels accounts, performed so many miracles that even all the books in the world didn’t have enough space to record them all, who supposedly had throngs and thousands of people following him and Hosanna praises by crowds in a triumphant entry to Jerusalem as the new king baloney, and who’s fame even reached throughout all of Syria while he was still alive, yet nobody or their cousin’s nephew seems to be aware of anything irregular or news scoop worthy to mention at or after the time. For instance, Philo-Judaeus (20 BCE-50 CE) was even in Jerusalem during those times and he saw or heard nothing going on worth mentioning and his friends and acquaintances sources in the area didn’t either, some other historians and writers of that time…Arrian, Lucius Seneca (4 BCE-65 CE), Dion Pruseus, Pliny the Elder, Pater Calus, Suetonius, Juvenal, Theon of Smyran, Martial, Phlegon, Persius, Pompon Mela, Plutarch, Quintus Curtius, Lucian, Apollonius, Pausanias, Valerius Flaccus, Quintilian, Forus Lucius, Lucanus, Phaedrus, Epictetus, Damis, Silius Italicus, Alulus Geuius, Statius, Ptolemy, Columella, Diochry Sostom, Hermogones, Lysias, Valerius Maxiimus, Cornelius, Titus Livius, Cluvius Rufus, Publius Petronius (the Roman consul) who lived in Jerusalem, all these writers heard nothing and not a word was written about any Jesus character or any irregular events magical or non-magical taking place around him. Nor do any of these authors make note of any disciples or apostles or any gospel associated great earthquake, sun darkening for hours, torn temple veil, rising zombies etc, either. But anyway, according to the biblical fables narratives, the Jesus character was a really, really, really big fan of Yahwehism-Jehovahism and his desert blood magic witchcraft, rules and laws (and don’t worry I’ll cover them with a section later and some other current Abrahamic religions offshoot cults and sects with juicy details and stuff you probably had no clue about, for instance about the whole Yahwehism-Jehovahism term even the very name of Jesus literally means “Yahweh is salvation”, and that since there is no “j” sound in Hebrew everyone actually keeps pronouncing names wrong all over the place (and some people think he’s not just another Yahwehism-Jehovahism minion? pfff as if), that’s just an early sneak peek of later facts which will astound many people). And what’s weirder is that the Jesus character had no clue about any future Paul character shenanigans and Paul didn’t even know about anything the Jesus character allegedly did or said or whether he was ever born on or lived on earth ever, and the Paul character is the one who started the whole missionary-writing thing supposedly decades before any of the numerous later gospels novels even started to be thought up and invented, which sure is weird and problematic. Screenshot image from Mythvision Podcast.
Yep, very problematic indeed and contradictions nonsense galore, and the Saul/Paul character is a huge part of the NT even many decades before some anonymous “gospels” novels were thought of and written much later (of the 27 books in the New Testament, 13 or 14 are traditionally attributed to Paul, though only 7 or 6 of these Pauline epistles are accepted as being authentic with the rest being forgeries, some scholars even believe they are all invented fiction super adventure stories with very valid supporting reasons). It seems the Saul/Paul character is constantly saying “Listen to me and what I say, pay no attention to what Jesus said or what any Christians who were Christians before me say or what any so-called disciples believe or say because I know better” just like a Jack Van Impe in the desert, and thus the charade and story vortex mutates further, it’s just another continuation of the same ol’ OT Hebrew agenda modus operandi of fabricated characters, superheroes, events and invented, edited and re-edited fables and mutating abstract concepts theologies (you’ll notice this is a very common feature among all 3 Abrahamic religions, they spring from the same fiction sources and each one involves mutating theologies and introducing abstract concepts and so ultimately they naturally are also based on fiction).
…And then the freshly made zombies will float up TO THE CLOUDS and meet us IN OUR NEW GENDERLESS IMMORTAL SPACESUIT BODIES in outer space ANY DAY OR MINUTE NOW, IT’S 100% GUARANTEED… The alleged absurd Saul/Paul character (who is actually the first letters writing author of any NT material supposedly and even taking up more than 1/2 of the entire NT, although half the letters are proven to be later forgeries by unknown writing fakers pretending to be a Paul), as in he himself admits that “everything” and anything he knows about any Jesus character was only after getting sunstroke and then later getting occasional secret visions and esoteric cryptic messages planted into his brain from outer space and dreaming (Paul, who according to his very obscure and odd used terminologies and worldview, and imminent zombifications cosmology theologies and behaviorism had obvious schizotypal personality disorder issues, and apparently knew nothing about any actual physical Jesus character being born, living, preaching, doing any miracles and zombifying or having any earthly disciples or even dying on earth as a real earthly person and no empty tomb talk or mention either of course, and in 2 Corinthians 12:1-7 he also said that he personally knew someone who even “floated up into outer space” to look around paradise at the “third heaven” in outer space but he wasn’t allowed to speak about what he supposedly saw or heard, lol sure why not. He also was sure that a Jesus character was coming any day now or even any minute and within his lifetime guaranteed, and writing that it was pointless for people to even get married, because his Jesus guaranteed it with holy secret news scoops put into his brain from outer space so he knew the inside scoop. He also said “his” Jesus wasn’t killed on earth by either Jews or Romans, but instead was crucified by various “archons”, princes and forces in outer space somewhere, “his” Jesus wasn’t coming back a 2nd time because he wrote he was completely unknown to anybody and that instead he was just arriving for the very 1st time in Paul’s lifetime “guaranteed”, at that time Paul guarantees that believers will float up to outer space past the clouds and at the same time risen zombies will float up also to meet him, like magic. Yep, even if he did exist he had obvious schizotypal personality disorder issues and magical thinking hallucinations not much different from the OT prophets before him who were likewise wrong in their predictions and promises also (and just like the decades later written Jesus character of the competing anonymous gospels novels, we don’t even have any evidence that this Saul/Paul character even existed either.
Heck, according to the narrative story of the letters if genuine as alleged by some (but still they are only a few tattered scraps dated only to the 2nd century anyway, about the size of a credit card and written in Greek, so we don’t even know what any originals would have had written on them), Paul never even met any Jesus character or mentions anything about an actual earthly physical life, or his birth, or ministry, or any miracles, or any words spoken on earth, earthly disciples, or any crucifixion and death on earth and not even a peep or mention about any empty tomb either as if it never even happened (which just might be important to later televangelists probably), but even he himself states that he had a sunstroke and heard voices in his head and occasionally secret esoteric cryptic messages and ideas were planted into his brain from outer space, or thinks he did anyway supposedly, and some dreaming to fill in gaps (Paul’s very odd behaviorisms, obscure and strange new terminologies and worldview, imminent zombifications cosmological theologies also very evidently come across as a clear textbook example of schizotypal personality disorder, the same as many biblical superhero characters actually), later even getting into conflicts with the Peter character and the later so-called original disciples characters (or early sectarian members anyway with all sorts of names being thrown around, Paul doesn’t seem to know or even imply that they knew any actual physical Jesus character either, that’s right in his letters the Jerusalem so-called “brethren” never mention or allude to any actual earthly living/physical/miracle working/swine and fig tree killing Jesus character either, no eyewitness mention or eyewitness alluding to NOT EVEN ONCE, they just seem to be a small secret sect of followers/fans of a new celestial “Lord” somewhere up in the beyond that they never physically met or saw either!), even considering them wrong and not in the know real Jesus followers, feeling he had to correct them because he had the real personally given inside gossip rumors news scoop from outer space (Paul even opposing and correcting him in public because Peter was clearly wrong he says, and after the arguments he leaves never to come back, but wait a second, the Jesus character supposedly told Peter he’s going to build his church with Peter we eventually read in the “decades later written” anonymous Matthew novel, why would this Saul/Paul guy consider the small Jerusalem clique members as mistaken nobodies who are not as informed with the inside secret outer space news scoops as himself?, Why wouldn’t they instead say “Look Bub, we lived and traveled with him for a year, or 3 years, we know what he said and did such as when he said bla bla bla and did such and such”, something just doesn’t add up here at all because it plainly appears they’re all referring to only a hazy obscure celestial spectre phantom being that only they knew about (by cherry picking and mistranslating out of context a few OT snippets and hallucinating/dreaming to fill in the gaps), a new celestial phantom superhero that was never even on earth ever), practically like a Levant deserts Kenneth Copeland 2,000 years ago (in 2 Corinthians 12:1-7 he even said that he personally knew someone who even “floated up into outer space” to look around paradise at the “third heaven” in outer space but he wasn’t allowed to speak about what he supposedly saw or heard, wow how about that? you might as well go up to the third heaven I guess but just don’t talk about it). But that’s just one of numerous examples that many decades and even centuries later written texts by anonymous authors are only putting words into the mouths of god/gods as well as many other prophets and messiahs characters, angels, spirits, demons and other characters, even putting words into the mouths of snakes and donkeys and fabricating events, just the same ol’ modus operandi of desert gurus and wannabe gurus which clearly proves we are talking about fiction. (Much later the anonymously written and wildly fictitious and inaccurate book of Acts material (written by the same author who wrote the so-called equally wildly fictitious Luke novel) even has prisoner-sailor Paul have an epic Homer’s Odyssey-ish exciting shipwreck adventure (even using the same rarely used Greek words and vocabulary actually used in Homer’s Odyssey to describe the ship adventure, that’s a less well known parallel and interesting tidbit actually…Acts 27–28 frequently points to the shipwrecks of Odysseus in Odyssey Books 5 and 12, the shipwrecks of Odysseus and Paul share nautical images and vocabulary, the appearance of a goddess or angel assuring safety, the riding of planks, the arrival of the “hero” on an island among hospitable strangers, the mistaking of the hero as a god, and the sending of him on his way. Also the anonymous author of Luke was writing in Greek so he would have known Homer’s works like the back of his hand so no surprise there), he personally takes over control of a ship during a storm, he causes great city-wide riots soon after getting off a boat, great rope and basket escapes, earthquakes magically opening doors while in prison and other magical back from the dead shenanigans…including even more exciting shenanigans…island poisonous snakes and snakebites Oh My!!! just like an ancient Doctor Strange).
Like I said, god doesn’t write books and that’s a fact, only the old delusional caves and tents dwelling writers during their desert deliriums and dreaming thousands of years ago wrote the various scrolls and texts (whoever they were and whenever they wrote them), and only them. Oh how problematic and absurd contradictory thou art oh Zi-Yawn. I have my own personal views about things based on various facts, truths, evidences and the oldest sources, real verified sources and the revealed esoteric mystical revelations of truth mysteries that are proven to extend right back to the Croatian populations from 10’s of thousands of years ago which would be long before the Middle Eastern biblical universe was even thought of or came into existence, without a doubt even to the times of the Cro-Magnons populations in the Danubian-Pannonian basin and across and beyond the geographically coterminous Transcarpathian regions (aka the Veneti and Veneti and Hyperboreans before that in antiquity, because remember Abaris the Hyperborean and even Apollo lived in Hyperborea, (On Delos, one story told how the pregnant goddess Leto travelled south to the island from Hyperborea, accompanied by wolves, where she gave birth to the god Apollo and Artemis-Eileithyia was summoned from the northern realm to assist with the labour), and the earliest extant source from 450 BCE to mention Hyperborea in detail is Herodotus’ Histories (Book IV, Chapters 3236)…..Herodotus wrote…”Thus they say that these sacred offerings come to Delos; but at first, they say, the Hyperboreans sent two maidens bearing the sacred offerings, whose names, say the Delians, were Hyperoche and Laodike, and with them for their protection the Hyperboreans sent five men of their nation to attend them…”. Pindar, Simonides of Ceos and Hellanicus of Lesbos were contemporaries of Herodotus in the 5th century BCE, and each also described or referenced the Hyperboreans in their works. Pindar believed the Hyperboreans to have lived near the sources of the Danube river (Olympian 3.14). The Hyperboreans are considered by the Greek authors as a people with very pure mores, and with feelings of justice superior, for that epoch, to those of anybody else. Mela (III. c.5) calls the Hyperboreans “cultores justissimi” (Just Worshippers) and Hellanic calls them “people who practice justice” (Fragmenta Hist. grace. I. 58. fragm. 96). The Hyperboreans present in everything the character of later ancient Latin mores and beliefs and so most probably they were some of the most well known Emperors and most learned men in the Roman Republic and later Empire, and of course they’re even recorded in ancient sources as founding the Oracle of Delphi where the temples built were said to have been built by Hyperborean pilgrims using Hyperborean beeswax and swan feathers that they brought with them, the Hyperboreans are also part of the founding of the very first Olympic Games, (It was said that Hercules made a pilgrimage to the Hyperboreans to obtain holy trees to adorn the established festival), among many other deeds, and the Hyperboreans were even known for sending their holy prophets and pilgrims into Greece and elsewhere), and I’m definitely not here to promote any political group or political agenda either because I’m not trying to be a messiah or savior of any humanoids, clubs or nations, however I’ll add here these partial excerpts from athiests.org entitled “Did Jesus Exist?” because it’s supplementary information about the topic in line with the other information…
…”The elimination of the OT then leaves only the New Testament (NT) “evidence” and extra biblical material to be considered. Essentially, the NT is composed of two types of documents: letters and would-be biographies (the so-called gospels). A third category of writing, apocalyptic, of which the Book of Revelation is an example, also exists, but it gives no support for the historicity of any Jesus. In fact, it would appear to be an intellectual fossil of the thought-world from which Christianity sprang – a failed Jewish apocalypse that was just reworked for Christian use.
The main character of the book (referred to 28 times) would seem to be “the Lamb,” an astral being seen in visions (no claims to historicity here!), and the book overall is redolent of ancient astrology and previous mystery religions of all sorts. The name Jesus occurs only seven times in the entire book, Christ only four times, and Jesus Christ only twice! While Revelation may very well derive from a very early period (contrary to the views of most biblical scholars, who deal with the book only in its final form), the Jesus of which it whispers obviously is not a man. He is a supernatural being. He has not yet acquired the physiological and metabolic properties of which we read in the gospels. The Jesus of Revelation is a god who would later be made into a man – not a man who would later become a god, as liberal religious scholars would have it…
…The notion that the four “gospels that made the cut” to be included in the official New Testament were written by men named Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John does not go back to early Christian times. The titles “According to Matthew,” etc., were not added until late in the second century. Thus, although Papias ca. 140 CE (‘Common Era’) says he knows all the gospels but has only heard of Matthew and Mark (but being another supreme fabulist he also supposedly knows that Judas swelled up so large that he could not walk through narrow streets (like the Kool-Aid Man), his eyes puffed swollen shut, his genitals enlarged and filled with pus and worms when had to urinate and that death came to him “in his own land” which still stinks so badly that no one can pass through there without holding their nose even up to today, wow now that’s dang darn interesting…lol, Papias is also an important early source on Christian oral tradition and especially on the origins of the canonical gospels novels, so no made up rubbish or fiction there), Justin Martyr (ca. 150 CE) knows of none of the four supposed authors (he refers only to excerpts of what he calls “Memoirs of the Apostles”, which sound very similar to Xenophon’s “Memoirs of Socrates”. as he was very acquainted with Socratic tradition, Xenophon and Plato’s “Socratic Dialogues” this is hardly surprising). It is only in 180 CE, with Irenæus of Lyons, that we are told who wrote the four “canonical” gospels and discover that there are exactly four of them because there are four quarters of the earth, four universal winds and because the so-called “Church Fathers” also identified the four gospel writers with the ridiculous absurd four living beings or beasts named in Revelation 4:6, 7; cf. Ezekiel 1:10—the lion was Mark, the ox was Luke, the flying eagle was John and the the creature with the face of a man was Matthew, this symbolic identification is made in both Christian literature and art through the centuries and is basically just more fabulist mutating hocus pocus inventions. Thus, unless one supposes the argument of Irenæus to be other than ridiculous, we come to the conclusion that the gospels are of unknown origin and authorship, and there is no good reason to suppose they are eye-witness accounts of a Jesus character. It could just as easily have been referring to the wonders of Dionysus turning water into wine, or to the healings of Asclepius etc…
…It is clear that the gospels of Matthew and Luke could not possibly have been written by an eye-witness of the tales they tell. Both writers plagiarize (largely verbatim word-for-word) up to 95% of the gospel of Mark, to which they add sayings of Jesus and would-be historical details. Ignoring the fact that Matthew and Luke contradict each other in many ways and in such critical details as the genealogy of Jesus – and thus cannot both be correct – we must ask why real eye-witnesses would have to plagiarize the entire ham-hocks-and-potatoes of the story, contenting themselves with adding merely a little gravy, salt, and pepper. A real eye-witness would have begun with a verse reading, “Now, boys and girls, I’m gonna tell you the story of Jesus the Messiah the way it really happened…” . The story would be a unique creation. It is significant that it is only these two gospels that purport to tell anything of Jesus’ birth, childhood, or ancestry and each author’s versions is vastly different with contradictory events, characters and time chronologies. Both can be dismissed as unreliable without further cause. We can know nothing of Jesus’ childhood or origin!…
…But what about the gospel of Mark, the oldest surviving gospel? Attaining essentially its final form probably as late as 90-120 CE but containing core material dating possibly as early as 70’s CE, it omits, as we have seen, almost the entire traditional biography of Jesus, instead beginning the story with John the Baptist giving Jesus a bath, and ending – in the oldest manuscripts – with women running frightened from the empty tomb not saying anything to anyone. (The alleged post-resurrection appearances reported in the last twelve verses of Mark are not found in the earliest manuscripts, even though the later fabrications are still printed in most modern bibles as though they were an “authentic” part of original Mark’s gospel, so everything written afterwards is blatantly just fiction on top of fiction). Moreover, “Mark” being a Non-Palestinian Non-disciple writing in fluent Greek, even the skimpy historical detail he provides and with the errors included is untrustworthy…
…To say that Mark’s account is “skimpy” is to understate the case. There really isn’t much to the gospel of Mark, the birth legends, genealogies, and childhood wonders all being absent. Whereas the gospel of Luke takes up 43 pages in the New English Bible, the gospel of Mark occupies only 25 pages – a mere 58% as much material! Stories do indeed grow with the retelling. I have claimed that the unknown author of Mark was a non-Palestinian non-disciple, which would make his story mere hearsay. What evidence do we have for this assertion? First of all, Mark shows no first-hand understanding of the social situation in Palestine. He is clearly a foreigner, removed both in space and time from the events he alleges,…
…Another powerful argument against the idea that Mark could have been an eye-witness of the existence of Jesus is based upon the observation that the author of Mark displays a profound lack of familiarity with Palestinian geography. If he had actually lived in Palestine, he would not have made the blunders to be found in his gospel. If he never lived in Palestine, he could not have been an eye-witness of Jesus. You get the point…
…The unreliability of the gospels is underscored when we learn that, just as with the first three gospels bear no internal indication of who wrote them. Can we glean anything of significance from the fourth and latest gospel, the gospel of John? Not likely! It is so unworldly, it can scarcely be cited for historical evidence. In this account, Jesus is hardly a man of flesh and blood at all – except for the purposes of divine cannibalism as required by the celebration of the rite of “holy communion.”…
…More importantly, there is evidence that the Gospel of John, like Matthew and Luke, also is a composite document, possibly incorporating an earlier “Signs Gospel” of some sort and of uncertain antiquity, but it would still be just an anonymous source written by someone, somewhere at some time anyway. Again, we ask, if “John” had been an eye-witness to Jesus, why would he need to plagiarize a list of miracles made up by someone else? Nor is there anything in the Signs Gospel that would lead one to suppose that it was an eye-witness account. It could just as easily have been referring to the wonders of Dionysus turning water into wine, or to the healings of Asclepius…
Why also change a one year mission written in the other gospels suddenly into a three year mission?, why reverse climactic important events and then change and invent new events?…
…Having eliminated the OT and the gospels from the list of possible biblical “evidences” of the existence of Jesus, we are left with the so-called epistles. At first blush, we might think that these epistles – some of which are by far the oldest parts of the NT, having been composed at least 30 years before the oldest gospel – would provide us with the most reliable information on Jesus. Well, so much for blushes. The oldest letters are the letters of St. Saul – the man who, after losing his mind, changed his name to Paul. Before going into details, we must point out right away, before we forget, that St. Saul’s testimony can be ignored quite safely, if what he tells us is true, namely, that he never met Jesus “in the flesh,” but rather saw him only in a vision he had during what appears to have been an epileptic seizure. No court of law would accept visions as evidence, and neither should we (otherwise any new religion guru or anyone can do that).
The reader might object that even if Saul only had hearsay evidence, some of it might be true. Some of it might tell us some facts about Jesus. Well, allright. Let’s look at the evidence. According to tradition, 13 of the letters in the NT are the work of St. Saul. Unfortunately, Bible scholars and computer experts have gone to work on these letters, and it turns out that only four can be shown to be substantially by the same author, putatively Saul. These are the letters known as Romans, 1 and 2 Corinthians, and Galatians. To these probably we may add the brief note to Philemon, a slave-owner, Philippians, and 1 Thessalonians. The rest of the so-called Pauline epistles can be shown to have been written by other and later authors, so we can throw them out right now and not worry about them as being contemporaneous historicity examples.
Saul tells us in 2 Corinthians 11:32 that King Aretas of the Nabateans tried to have him arrested because of his Christian agitation. Since Aretas is known to have died in the year 40 CE, this means that Saul became a Christian before that date. So what do we find out about Jesus from a man who had become a Christian less than ten years after the alleged crucifixion Precious little!
Once again, G.A. Wells, in his book The Historical Evidence for Jesus [pp. 22-23], sums things up so succinctly, that I quote him verbatim: The…Pauline letters…are so completely silent concerning the events that were later recorded in the gospels as to suggest that these events were not known to Paul, who, however, could not have been ignorant of them if they had really occurred.
These letters have no allusion to the parents of Jesus, let alone to the virgin birth. They never refer to a place of birth (for example, by calling him ‘of Nazareth’). They give no indication of the time or place of his earthly existence. They do not refer to his trial before a Roman official, nor to Jerusalem as the place of execution. They mention no sermons, parables, neither John the Baptist, nor Judas, nor Peter’s denial of his master. (They do, of course, mention Peter, but do not imply that he, any more than Paul himself, had known any earthly Jesus while he had been alive).
These letters also fail to mention any miracles Jesus is supposed to have worked, a particularly striking omission, since, according to the gospels, he worked so many that all the books in the world wouldn’t have enough space to record them all, so not even a one of them being mentioned is very strange and problematic.
Another striking feature of Paul’s letters is that one could never gather from them that Jesus had been an ethical teacher… on only one occasion does he appeal to the authority of Jesus to support an ethical teaching which the gospels also represent Jesus as having delivered…So much for the testimony of Saul. His Jesus is nothing more than the thinnest hearsay, a vague legendary creature which was crucified as a sacrifice somewhere out there, a creature totally lacking a biography and invisible…
…It would be intellectually satisfying to learn just how it was that the Jesus character condensed out of the religious atmosphere of the first century. But scholars are at work on the problem. The publication of many examples of so-called wisdom literature, along with the materials from the Essene community at Qumran by the Dead Sea and the Gnostic literature from the Nag Hammadi library in Egypt, has given us a much more detailed picture of the communal psychopathologies which infested the Eastern Mediterranean world at the turn of the era. It is not unrealistic to expect that we will be able, before long, to reconstruct in reasonable detail the stages by which Jesus came to eventially only much later have a contradictions flled biography.”
And that’s just barely even scraping the tip of the tip of the tip of an iceberg regarding these topics so far, for more very easy to read and understand information as a starting point about shovelling out the tons of made up invented stories and contradictions manure, I recommend checking out the following links as well as their Youtube debates and videos particularly as a starting point;
And then of course we have the John gospel Jesus which is the last gospel version and extremely different from the other 3 gospels and missing lots of the information, the gospel of John has instead a newer hardcore pentecostal version Jesus character who is reminding everyone that he is god basically and has always existed and is the source for eternal life which is very different from the other 3 gospels, in John’s gospel he’s more like a hardcore preachy Pentecostal Terminator-Jesus who’s arrived and constantly traveling around causing problems with all authorities everywhere he goes and at every chance he gets, he calls Jews the children of the Devil, he’s pissing of rabbis, Pharisees, Sadducees and regular people every day, causing near riots and the temple fiasco, despised by the Sanhedrin, getting kicked out of towns by mobs and then barely escaping by an inch of his life from being seized and stoned to death, not a popular guy at all basically. Here the new Pentecostal Terminator Jesus-God is really on a mission and doesn’t much care about the poor or needy at all but instead constantly keeps preaching and reminding about his own preexistent divinity, glory and importance and that only he is to be worshipped and adored…
“Tell them about the time a multitude of zombies rose from their graves and zombily walked around the city seen by many.” Incredible and shocking as it may seem to some because of all the later added material, obscurantism and cherry picking repetitions of only a few anonymously written text excerpts (especially today), many people are not even aware that “Christianity” was a much later appearing term and religious belief cult and sect that was only started out by and meant only for Jews in the Levant. The very earliest followers of the Jesus character according to the narrative were just only apocalyptic Jews-Christians who were expecting a new world-ruling Jesus-Messiah-Yahweh kingdom of priests based in Jerusalem to arrive very soon in their lifetime and even any day or hour now, a new sect who didn’t even call themselves that but instead called themselves “Disciples of the Lord/Disciples of the Way” or just “Bothers of the Lord”, a new close-knit extended family of apocalyptic blood magic cultists basically. Even later the early “Christian groups” (as there were many of the appearing cults and sects believing different versions of “The Way” right from the start) they were still all strictly Jewish, such as the Ebionites and the early Christian community in Jerusalem. They believed only in traditional Jewish eschatology and the continued Jewish customs, traditions, prophecies and OT writings. Only after, especially after the destruction of the Jerusalem Temple by God in circa. 70 CE, only then did the Jews fully abandon and reject “The Way” and any Jesus as a messiah or “King of the Jews” concept. Then only over the next decades and centuries as the Jesus character and belief systems greatly mutated with many added new stories/gospels, traditions and beliefs incorporating all sorts of ideas, theologies and abstract concepts such as older esoteric mysticism, pagan philosophies, Zoroastrianism, Hellenism and Roman ideas etc, only then did it spread further to the Gentiles and break completely with the original failed and rejected Jewish sect beliefs that started it strictly for Jews anyway, i.e. – the original Jewish cult(s) of later so-called “Christianity” was never even meant for Non-Jews in the first place, but was on the contrary just another failed Jewish apocalyptic sect hoping for a saviour messiah to defeat all their enemies (the Non-Jews/Gentiles/Romans etc) and then set up a new most powerful world-ruling priests kingdom in Jerusalem which failed to materialize, ipso facto.
All these fish stories seem very fishy to me, Jonah in the fish for 3 days, feeding thousands of people with just a few measly fish sticks (because they all followed to listen way out in the middle of nowhere and absolutely nobody packed a lunch) and now this. How about that neato cool fish and coin magic trick in the Matthew gospel novel book? gosh golly that sure was amazing, where he tells Peter..(drum roll please)..to go catch a fish and open its mouth and then presto-magico he’ll find a coin in it’s mouth to pay the temple tax, that’s just gosh darn swell that’s for sure Jesus saves the day again. Which makes me wonder why televangelists can’t do that trick? also when you have amazing omnipotent powers to move mountains, raising zombies, make wine and cure diseases, a coin-fish trick sure is remarkable and definitely not hocus-pocus shenanigans going on you have to admit. This one goes right up there with the killing 2,000 demon-possessed swine and killing that dagnabit unruly fig tree, he was the Doug Henning of the Levant at the time without a doubt. GLO-RY!
According to the Mark hocus pocus gospel story narrative, Jesus made 2,000 swine commit suicide by drowning, (which simultaneously destroyed the entire local economy, good going genius, so many pork chops, pork tenderloin, spare ribs, ham sandwiches and bacon just wasted for nothing that could have instead easily fed many multitudes of hungry families and people for months and months). The main point being though, when exorcising demons don’t cast them all the way back to hell or to the desert or a cave or wherever, just make a deal with them and deflect-cast them into the closest herd of swine, cows, cats or squirrels etc, but if you live in a city or downtown then just make a deal to cast them into the closest gaggle of people at the mall or the closest fast food joint or coffee shop, it’s that easy (besides it is so plainly obvious anyway that this is just an invented written up exorcism hocus pocus show “theological miracle”, just another theatrical show for the reader or listener, because Jews don’t even eat or touch pork only Non-Jewish people would have eaten pork (it makes about as much sense as 2,000 lobsters crawling around), and we are talking here about not a realistic herd of 20, 50, 100 or even 300 swine, it’s frikin 2,000 pigs on a hillside which a huge number of pigs, lol, so it’s obviously just a blatantly fabricated theatrical theological diss at any Non-Jews in the area). Moreover, obvious also is the parallelism with Egyptian religious beliefs as will be explored further later, because we know that the religious customs of circumcision, pork eating prohibition and even baptism rituals were present in Egypt long before there even was any Israelites or a newly appearing Yahwehism-Jehovahism religion (baptism actually even going back further still to ancient India religious traditions), however the Jews later just borrowed and adapted these customs, even the customs of circumcision and being forbidden to eat pork has much earlier tradition origins from them also, particularly because the Egyptian god Set murdered his brother Osiris and would transform into a black pig as well as being an enemy of Horus, thus the taboo of eating swine still being a religious prohibition among them even still today. Thus this particular parallelism is very evidently from ancient Egyptian religion mythology and represents the god Set in conflict with Horus.
Also like I explained near the beginning of this post, about having “faith” in something unproven with absolutely no evidence or even worse with ample contrary evidence and especially when not getting the promised results from the hopes and wishes to the magical cosmic dirtbag genie, “prayer” also is just more of the same and really just “hoping” something will or won’t happen, when the hoped for thing didn’t happen well then you just move onto something else and forget about it and pray for something else instead.
Does prayer work and get answered as described and promised in the written material and claimed by televangelists and fabulist charlatans or is it just the same probabilities, chance and coincidences like asking a Magic 8-Ball?…you better ask the 8 ball about that.
According to the biblical narrative texts, John the baptist wore camel hair, had unkempt hair and beard looking like a disheveled wildman, he lived in the wilderness away from civilization boldly yelling at people all sorts of crazy ideas, snacked on wild honey from rock crevices, tree sap and ate locusts for food…yum, (according to some scholars he was probably just forced to live in the wilderness, because would you rent a place to him as a neighbor and ruining your birthday party and dinner, and probably leaving locust crumbs all over the place? He would never be invited on any televangelist show either that’s for sure, they’d probably bar him off the premises…security!!! LOL), today a person like this would be forced to a mental hospital to take medications and learn to bathe and eat regularly, strangely though the Jesus character is quoted as saying “I tell you, among those born of women none is greater than John”. Really? now that’s verily very interesting and ridiculously absurd, greatest man ever born you say? Pfff that seems very dubious and highly unlikely B.S. Tough luck Aristotle, Heraclitus, and Lucretius et al (and even Moses and Abraham etc). According to the biblical stories then it’s really no big surprise why they both had the same enemies who thought of them both as troublemaking crazy lunatics. (Hey you, spit those locusts out of your mouth and have some fresh BBQed porkchops and real food you stupid jerk! and put on some real clothes too it’s not caveman days anymore). Btw, contrary to most televangelist’s erroneous perception and fabrications, the bugs eating and camels furs wearing John the baptizer is not some original new guy on the scene with new heavenly revealed “water magic” secrets and rituals, instead he’s just slinging the same ol’ hash that many other pagan religions had been doing already for thousands of years before him so it’s no new holy concept magical tradition. Baptism by water was a very, very old pagan rite, being practiced already by the followers of Zoroaster, by the ancient Chaldeans of Babylonia, by the Romans, the Greeks, the ancient Egyptians, as well as a number of European pagan tribal religions and even known to have been a common water immersion purification rite among various Indigenous Native American religions, it was also in vogue among the ancient Hindus at a still earlier date, so it was a “water magic” ritual already known and used by “pagans” for over 3,000 years previously, yep just slinging the same ol’ hash and nothing new. Also, so let me get this straight, so according to the story many, many thousands of people from far and wide come to get baptized and he’s become extremely well known and even famous across the lands, then he acknowledges a new arriving Jesus character as the Jewish messiah and the promised savior of the Jews and so probably the most important Jewish person since Moses, but probably even more important, but then he just keeps on doing his arrived doomsday burnings and water magic shtick having his own sectarian disciples and cult movement like nothing even happened. He never joins Jesus, doesn’t follow or help him, never speaks about him or even mention him but also THEY NEVER EVEN BUMP INTO EACH OTHER EVER AGAIN, EVER. Not even once do they cross paths again…ever, but one of the gospels-novels even has them being cousins (John gospel). Also not long after John gets into big trouble with the authorities, with the Pharisees, Sadducees but especially mainly with the reigning king Herod Antipas, why? because John gets all righteous uppity and starts causing big trouble badmouthing Herod Antipas for being divorced and remarrying (very powerful and not exactly a guy you want to mess with Herod Antipas btw, basically flinging camel dung at his face). Yep, he forgets all about Jesus the Jewish messiah the supposed son of their god the master of their universe (according to the story narrative), and instead he becomes all obsessed and fixated sticking his nose in Herod’s bed basically, and speaking out not against any orgies or murders going on but instead being vehemently against just only his marriage after being divorced, he wasn’t going around sacrificing babies or worshipping a cow just only for that (the “Son of Yahweh” master of our universe is walking around in your backyard Herod but you got remarried after a divorce dagnabit darn holy dang I tell you!), or how about just telling any people anywhere?…”Oh hey! Guess what!? Our messiah is here! He’s here right now on his way to Jerusalem people! He was at the river just yesterday and I was chatting with him, he’s really here for real Glo-Ry!”…Pfff not a peep to anybody some prophet. It’s like a ridiculous absurd comedy, according to the narrative he was even born for this specific reason in the first place to specifically introduce and hail the Jewish messiah and his kingdom on earth, but instead he then disappears entirely and the next time he’s mentioned he’s not hailing any new messiah superhero and his new kingdom or preaching his actual arrival…nope, he instead has a bee in his bonnet causing trouble and angry that his king got married, THAT’S his major malfunction problem and topic to preach about?! (the many centuries long-awaited messiah is here right now, but this king is getting married, oh that’s it I can’t let this event happen without saying a word or two dagnabit I tell you!), he’s a totally vacuous stooge and imbecile joke. Needless to say all these purported claimed events are very strange and absurd, in the stories they strangely never crossed paths or bumped into each other ever again which is very strange, however according to the stories John the baptizer and the Jesus character did both get executed around the same time by the authorities for being religious nuts troublemakers and fanatical cultic gurus, which was not strange and actually very common at the time, it was a thing.
Literally, and I mean literally, just a few pages in and the most wisest powerful “all-knowing” master of the universe gets duped by a talking snake, the god character was absolutely clueless (walking around his garden asking “Adam where are you?…Who told you that bla bla bla?” talk about asleep on the job), which sets the tone for the rest of the novel and what other sorts of plots, stories and characters to expect, the reader right from the start of the novel gets the strong feeling that the main god character is not very bright or as “all-knowing” as he keeps reminding and claiming that he is.
A display of Cro-Magnon people in a cave in Europe during the LGM Ice Age circa. 45,000 years ago, the historical recreation scene at the Disney Epcot Center and similar displays at other museums are based on archaeological evidences and remains including the cave paintings dated to the prehistoric paleolithic stone age period to the Holocene period. The scene recreates furs wearing people sitting around a fire listening to a local shaman holy man after a mammoth, bison or deer hunt dinner (This would be well over a hundred years before the biblical fable John character was mentioned and would verily indicate that Noah most probably lived during the Ice Age in the vicinity of Transcarpathia and modern day Poland, as well as suggest that the ark was most likely made of Christmas Trees. Interestingly, whereas the Abrahamic religions had their Zoroastrian/Mesopotamian adapted dualism concepts between 2 warring deities in neverending battles for control of the earth and people, the ancient Croats Hyperboreans instead had their “Natural Dualism” and important Cult of the Trees, every tree was related to a certain deity to whom they prayed and believing that the Oak Tree was in fact the Tree of Life, as well as understanding the sacred oak tree as a symbological earthly abode of the dead ancestors. The Oak tree was also a sacred tree in the later Baltic and Slavic mythology and to their main deity god Perun/Perkūnas). It should be reminded again that televangelists and scamvangelists are in such a state of delusional psychotic obsession with the biblical 6,000 year old world history timeline of the bible including their neurotic fixations-mania with the Levant universe (especially the ancient Canaan-Palestine-Levant universe and magical action superhero characters), that anything that lies outside that imaginary universe bubble is never discussed or even acknowledged as if it doesn’t even exist or isn’t real, (and this without even getting into how we can trace back to the first carbon-based life and the single-celled algae and amoeba that was the building blocks origins of every animal on the planet including the various divergent humanoids populations)…topics such as reality, dinosaurs, tectonic plates movement, glaciation, the actual real solar system and galaxy movements and laws and many natural world systems, and of course the LGM Ice Age and the populations living in those areas and time periods as mentioned above. To be so fixated and manic-obsessed with only just that ancient Canaan-Levant universe bubble and their various fictions stories and superheroes characters (except other faith seeds bank accounts of course Glo-Ry Praizzze Gawd), and mutating into invented abstract concepts-theologies, can correctly be termed as a mental illness and likewise as sick people with a psychosis out of touch with reality, 8 out of 10 Ice Age EEMH cave people agree and insist they verily existed and ate bison steaks.
Discovered in 1891 near Dolní Věstonice in Czechia, (today’s Czech Republic), was a mammoth ivory carving of a male head which was originally the top of a longer figure or staff and broken off, and after various scientific analysis including alpha particle spectrometer testing is dated to at least approximately 26,000 years ago. The eight centimeter high carved figure includes rudimentary stylization characteristics and of long hair extending well past the ears and extending down the neck past the break-off point. Archaeologists, paleontologists and scientists agree that the ivory carving is most assuredly a Cro-Magnon representation from the last Ice Age. We don’t know who carved it or why, whether it was made by an older person, a younger person, a child, a male or female or perhaps even by the subject himself as an autoportrait attempt. Was he a hunter or warrior and protector of his tribes? Was he an Ice Age King?…we will probably never know, perhaps even a wizard and shaman sorcerer and one of the very first Lucifers (Light-Bringer/Bringer of Light/Morning Star etc). It may very well be that the primordial chthonic Hyperborean deities had commanded or guided this ancient Cro-Magnon artist/wizard/sorcerer king to make the mammoth statue for posterity (and considering the oldest written sources knowing that the Croatian tribes inhabited these wide geographically coterminous areas in antiquity before crossing the Danube to ancient Dalmatia, Pannonia and Illyricum in the 6th-7th centuries, then it could very well be we are looking at a carved image of one of those ancient Croats). Interesting to note also, genetically, on the Y chromosome line, a majority (87%) of Croats belong to one of the three major European Y-DNA haplogroups – Haplogroup I (38%), Haplogroup R1a (35%) and Haplogroup R1b (16%). All three of these groups appeared in Europe during the Upper Paleolithic around 30,000-20,000 BCE. Furthermore, the dominant presence of Haplogroup I-M170 is rather interesting, as it is considered the oldest and only native European haplogroup and is found nowhere else. The Haplogroup I-M170 exists only in Europe and is fairly widespread, but in relatively smaller percentages extending westward and eastward. Its frequency in the Croatian lands and among Croats is high, but the only populations that have similar levels of the I Haplogroup are the Scandinavians. Haplogroup I-M170 has been shown to have weathered the last glacial maximum in the lands corresponding to modern day Croatia and surrounding area in Central Europe and then migrated north as the ice sheets retreated. Also, by these statistics we can clearly see that the strongest Haplogroup in Croatians is Haplogroup I-M170 and that we share subclades of Haplogroup I-M170 with Scandinavians more than anyone else in Europe, so the early European populations that went on to become Scandinavians also went on to become Croatians. Whatever the case may be and using even just this information, either way the 10’s of thousands of years later anonymous biblical authors and their written text material in the Levant area had absolutely no knowledge of the populations living in these areas and during those time periods, which would apparently mean that their god didn’t know either (but then again he didn’t even know there was a talking snake in his garden so it’s not that surprising).
As another much later example highlighted by the Nebra sky disc, dated by archaelogists to around 1600 BCE during the time of the Bronze Age Unetice Culture in Central Europe, the areas from whence the earliest Croatian tribes were located in antiquity and also called Hyperborea by later Greek and Roman writers, which would make the decorated disk at least 3,600 years old, and probably much older as that is only when it was buried with estimates of being 3,800 to 4,100 years old (the inlaid gold symbols are interpreted generally as the Sun or Full Moon, a lunar crescent, and the Pleiades star cluster, two golden arcs along the sides to mark the angle between the solstices and together it features the oldest concrete depiction of the cosmos yet known from anywhere in the world). Also it is now proven scientifically that the ancestors of the later Croats, the Balto-Slavic speaking peoples, Germanic and Celts populated Europe long before 4 thousand years ago, which also connects with DNA and genetic evidences the earliest pre-migration Croatian tribes to the Bronze Age Unetice Culture, these times and geographically coterminous areas. The circa. 3,600-4,100 year old disc was made long before any Germanic or Balto-Slavic languages groups appeared, we don’t even know what language it was that they used or whether it is connected to any modern languages that exist today, perhaps probably a Hyperborean proto-language older than any European language that German and Balto-Slavic languages eventually sprang forth from. But the main point is, this and many other evidences are just more proof that people lived and had functioning societies and technologies manufacturing capabilities of various items in those areas during those times. But we need to ask why would a Zoroastrian Yahweh-Jehovah desert tribal deity only be floating and hanging around the Middle East then? Why only galavanting there talking only to a few guys in the desert once in a very long while or once every few centuries, just to give secret blood magic news scoops, sacrificings, slaughtering and fashion and food eating tips? If he’s so great why not tell people in Europe? or in Asia? or the Native Peoples living in California and Mexico etc? Why the heck only floating around in and fixated with only remote Levant area deserts doing hocus pocus and that’s it? Why only giving news scoops advice to traveling recluse nobodies living in caves or tents in the middle of nowhere? and then just smitings and lamentings and failed prophecies constantly back and forth? That makes absolutely no sense if you’re supposedly the all-powerful, all-knowing master of the universe and of the planet but you can’t even find the Danube river or Japan or Mexico to tell them too, (if he did can you imagine just how many more faith shekels seeds could be had for the temples coffers? lots more that’s for sure, and lots more sheep’s blood too as a bonus), it instead sounds much more like just yet another puny invented ho-hum desert tribal deity and his contradictory long-winded jimble jamble speeches…which it is. (some scholars suggest there are 3 reasons why it didn’t appear to anyone in Europe to pass on his news scoops and grooming tips…1- either he was unable to as per the chariots of iron scenario mentioned earlier, 2- he didn’t want to because he knew full well they wouldn’t give up their bacon and pork roasts recipes for anyone, or 3- because the talking snake gave him the wrong directions and he ended up in Antarctica, many scholars are even still today debating this contradictory problematic topic).
Interestingly, it’s very apparent that the Hyperborean Croat shaman wizard priests of the Bronze Age especially were already very well aware of and acquainted with a round earth belief system and cosmology (in large part to their receiving guidance from the Hyperborean Gatekeepers in the celestial cosmos), and with the portable Nebra sky disc featuring the oldest concrete depiction of the cosmos yet known from anywhere in the world, they were then privy to this knowledge even over 1,000 years before the Babylonians (and the later Abrahamic blood magic cults). Even though it’s a more recent circa. 4000 year old evidence example from among others that go back 10s of thousands of years as already mentioned, according to the Abrahamic religions very own history chronology timeline the Nebra sky disc was then made at about the exact same time that their Yahweh-Jehovah god made and was playing Hide ‘N Seek with Adam and getting duped by a measly puny snake, hence another evidence that the Hyperboreans already existed before Adam and Eve and were more knowledgable about reality and the actual real cosmos and universe. Interestingly also, whereas the later Abrahamic religions had their Zoroastrian/Mesopotamian adapted dualism concepts between 2 warring deities in neverending battles for control of the earth and people, the ancient Croats Hyperboreans instead had their “Natural Dualism” and important Cult of the Trees, every tree was related to a certain deity to whom they prayed and believing that the Oak Tree was in fact the Tree of Life, as well as understanding the sacred oak tree as a symbological earthly abode of the dead ancestors and cycle of rebirth/seasons.
“Ice Ages? Europe? Hyperboreans? Asia? Cave Paintings? Fossils? Germs? Continents? Meteorites? Rain and Snow Clouds? Hydrological Cycle? Lightwave Particles Refraction? Round Earth? Orbits and Earth Rotations? Talking Ducks? Noodles?…I don’t recall writing anything about that, are you sure you even know what you’re talking about?”. But on the other hand what he did write, supposedly as the story goes, according to Dan Barker a former Bible-Belt Pastor, and many, many, many others, the OT god is the most unpleasant character in all fiction; jealous and proud of it; a petty, unjust, unforgiving, control-freak; a vindictive, bloodthirsty ethnic cleanser; a misogynistic, ultra extreme ethnocentric parochial, infanticidal, genocidal, filicidal, pestilential, megalomaniacal, sadomasochistic, capriciously malevolent bully, pyromaniacal, angry, merciless, curse-hurling, vaccicidal, aborticidal, cannibalistic, slavemonger, homicidal, evil, and a terrorist, and it even admits it himself that he creates evil and more, see his website https://unpleasant.ffrf.org/ for easy to read proof with the bible verses people don’t like to admit exists which shows that the OT god is really no god at all but is more an absurd moral monster.
Luke 14:26 – “If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters–yes, even their own life–such a person cannot be my disciple.”, which in modern day translation means “Don’t forget to affix sufficient postage when sowing your mustard faith-seed gift for the harvest, expect a harvest”. Above is a portrayal of Jesus approving of Joshua’s genocidal massacres and ethnic cleansing campaigns. Praizzze Gawd GLO-RY!
This one isn’t as warped disturbing and filth imagery nonsense like other textual points shown here, it’s more comical absurd and ironically laughable, because since the advent of the idiot box starting a new religion is as easy as ever with guaranteed herds of lackeys and feeble-minded fans to support and clap for you. It’s almost like telescamvangelists and biblical guru-esses pretend they don’t even know how to read their scripture text that is so plain to read a 5 year old could do it. After all it doesn’t say..”…not allowed to speak in a church meeting…but you can if it verily bringeths forth books, DVDs and faith seed harvests to the bank accounts temples coffers”. It seems the Joyce Meyers, Gloria Copelands (woot woot woot! from a video below), Paula Whites and a plethora of others, as well as those 700 Club, 100 Huntley Street and other similar perfidious chicanery women on stages and inventing and begging for shekels behind microphones, are verily disobeying the bible and written rules as if they don’t even exist. Instead of the lackeys and pew-potato fans in the seats applauding, amen-ing, halleluja-ing and glory be-ing, they probably verily should instead be in unison rightfully yelling “Boo! Hisss! Boo! Get off the stage heretical blasphemer!”, I ask the reader what sort of people are these when they even have to resort to getting women to lie through their teeth on stage and behind microphones in an obssesive fixation delirium consumed with imaginary characters and realities just to keep feeding their lies universe and fictions absurdity continuum? (oh and on top of that all those likewise invented Abrahamic voodoo theologies books, DVDs and insulting worthless bic-a-brac that’s for sure, crippled and fatal incurable diseases children in hospitals are not an issue becauseit’s the lords’s will and all that holy righteous scripture character’s mysteries)…or perhaps even throwing empty soda pop cups, candy wrappers and popcorn containers at the stage like they do at movie screens when a villain shows up or when the movie is ridiculously unentertaining, as in holy flying containers and debris all over the place for the lord and holy ghost.
Besides the more acquainted with, known and obvious errors, contradictions and later applied mythologies and ridiculous quotes attributed, one less well known aspect and probably not much thought about regarding the Jesus character is his using ancient pagan “Imitative Magic” to perform his earliest “miracles” in the narrative fables. In the earliest gospel of Mark narrative stories Jesus performs miracles using spit and spittle, an already familiar feature among many previous popular “miracle men” and “wonder workers” in pagan religions and legends and customs going back many centuries in antiquity already, in ancient Greece and Rome, ancient Babylon, found even all the way to India and China in old legends, and even already present among North American Native people’s shamans and medicine men who never even heard of biblical characters, so this is very, very strange and is clearly reminiscent of those earlier pagan magic men customs. When in Mark he puts his fingers into a deaf and mute man’s ears and then he spits and touches the man’s tongue, and in Mark again when he spits on a blind man’s eyes (literally spitting on his face) to restore his sight (after 2 attempts though because the first attempt was not successful, occasionally he was even unable to perform miracles). And in the other later written Matthew and Luke gospel novels there is absolutely no mention of using spit but instead just words and commands, the spit miracles disappear because it was most likely one of the things they didn’t like written in Mark and took offence and so then changed or just omitted things. This then clearly shows that we are dealing here with a fictitious “magic man” employing older ancient pagan religions traditional and legendary Imitative Magic superpowers and abilities that were used by pagan magic miracle men before him. The 3rd and last time is in the last John gospel fable novel where he spits on the ground and then makes some mud with the saliva, and puts it on the blind man’s eyes to restore sight. (Very strange again in this version, when asked by his usually forgetfull bonehead disciples “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?’ Jesus replies “Neither this man nor his parents sinned, but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him”). Ohhhh ok I see now, so the guy was blind his entire life specifically just only so that he could be hocus pocus healed by Jesus at that specific moment to wow a gaggle of nobodies lolligaggers, a dozen or so pointless unknown onlookers to be “amazed” like at a downtown corner watching a guy do a pea in the shell game or card trick or breakdancing…clap, clap, clap amazing! (throws sheckels into hat), blind for decades since birth just for that single reason only. As explored and shown later this is because in the John gospel fables everything and everyone is always about him and his mission and him being all eternal powerful and the best at everything and the entire world and cosmos revolving around just him and all that, acting like a desert Kenneth Copeland, does that seem creepy and eerily warped enough? That is outrageously absurd and mentally imbalanced to imply or even imagine someone to be born blind just for that reason alone, it’s actually disgusting and revolting, it’s coming across as that whole OT writers pointless abstract theologies modus operandi drivel stories all over again, it’s as believable and nonsensical as a Neil Breen movie script made 2,000 years ago (A perfect situation and opportunity to do a healing miracle and say something epic or wise, but instead he puts a simultaneous damper on the “spit miracle” and throws it all straight to hell ruining everything, even I would have said something more memorable and wise, when you factor in the other episodes where it’s “demons” and “spirits” to blame for people’s sicknesses and ailments, who the heck wrote this ridiculous stuff?). Besides, everyone knows that spitting and spreading your saliva on people to heal eczema, migraines, cancer, blindness or for any reason is medically wrong and could be very dangerous, which is why doctors don’t do it or recommend it, and we know the real medically proven reasons for diseases and health problems and it’s not because of any wandering demons and spirits as explained by primitive writers. Basically even just these 3 absurd magic man spitting episodes examples alone speaks volumes and is very suspicious and just sounds made up to wow the simpleton audience like at a Doug Henning magic show, just without the sparkles, bell bottoms and women assistants in hot pants doing those hand and arm motions of course. (btw, as for the magician tarot card seen above, according to Mosaic Law which even the Jesus character 100% was a fan of and supported, even just using tarot cards for entertainment is enough to get you killed because that’s the law, including of course reading horoscopes, asking the 8ball, using healing crystals, aromatherapy, yoga, interpreting dreams/psychology, psychic displays, watching Harry Potter/Lord of the Rings movies etc, also including numerology, oh sure you can still use all that Hebrew and Torah numerology to find out what really happened in the Garden of Eden and in Jacob’s’ tent, Christian and related esoteric biblical invented numerology to find the Beast, scrolls and golden lamps, or various Muslim numerology for information from the unseen world, but all the other numerology out there is an abomination and = DEATH!).
….clap, clap, clap…thank you, thank you very much, you’re a wonderful audience, later I’m going to amaze you by feeding 5,000 people with 5 dinner rolls and some fish sticks, then make 2,000 pigs appear and commit suicide by drowning and then top it off by making a real life zombie, but first here we have a man blind since birth and born of a woman. Nothing under my left sleeve, nothing under my right sleeve…drum roll please!….
YEP THAT’S PRETTY CONFUSED SICKO CHARACTER WITH WARPED PRIORITIES AND BELIEFS. VERY MUCH LIKE MANY OT CHARACTERS, THE ABSURD CONCOCTED JESUS CHARACTER IS NATURALLY TOTALLY ABSENT FROM ALL CONTEMPORANEOUS WRITTEN SOURCES AND A COMPLETELY INVISIBLE MAGIC MAN PHANTOM TO KNOWN HISTORY AND WRITINGS, INCLUDING THE VARIOUS CONNECTED ZOMBIES AND HOCUS POCUS MAGICS OF COURSE (IN FACT EVENTUALLY MUTATED TO HAVE MUCH IN COMMON WITH NUMEROUS OTHER EXISTING EARLIER CLASSICAL GHOST STORIES, WHICH WERE ALREADY VERY COMMON THEMES AND EVEN POPULAR CLICHE TROPES AMONG MANY ORAL AND WRITTEN LEGENDS), THUS ACCORDING TO THE LINEAR WRITTEN EVIDENCES, AND OVERWHELMING LACK OF ANY EVIDENCES, VERY EVIDENTLY THE PRODUCT OF THE LATER ANONYMOUS SECTARIAN NT WRITER’S AGENDAS USING COERCIVE MIND CONTROL IMAGINATIONS WITH SUSPENSION OF DISBELIEF MENTAL MANIPULATIONS PLANS DIRECTED AT POTENTIAL DUPED FOLLOWERS. “Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword” – Matthew 10:34. As already mentioned, the Jesus character in the various gospel narratives fables stories said, supposedly as the stories go, some pretty crazy, mentally unbalanced and weird things you have to admit, if he or anyone ever said them according to the much later anonymously written novelizations, whoever, wherever and whenever they wrote them for whatever theological cultish Yahwehism-Jehovahism reason (There are some legends sources that say hundreds of men refused his request to drop everything, leave families and become fishers of men by saying NO). All sorts of strange, very odd, contradictory and disturbing quotes as if spoken by a psychopath with various complexes and no logic or just a not very well thought out fiction character (Actually really not much different from all the other Old Testament cultish nonsense obsessed superheroes and supporting actors…Example: “But I’m not a phantasm, I verily left behind all them proofs, I made zombies rise and all the books I wrote and approved”).
…Just some of the things found only in the John gospel and not in the 3 earlier novels are the parts featuring Jesus turning water into wine at the wedding at Cana (just like a Dionysus), the resurrection of Lazarus (which becomes the main reason the rabbis want to sentence him to death instead of the temple freak-out reason in the other 3 gospels, a new Lazarus hocus pocus story not even found in the other 3 novels), Jesus washing the feet of his disciples and exorcisms of demons are not in the other 3 gospels but found only in John (But why would the other 3 earlier gospels leave out even just these things out?, especially the impressive Lazarus zombie trick, because you have to admit that is one gosh darn dang great trick that would have wowed many and brought lots more converts galore). Heck that would be like leaving out the winter Russia campaign when doing a biography book about Napoleon, leaving out that Marilyn Monroe was on the very first issue of Playboy magazine while doing a Hugh Hefner biography book, like leaving out a famous pivotal final chase scene or epic battle in a Batman film (because Batman just disappears out of the story for some reason and then the movie is over), like leaving out cheese while making a pizza or diced tomatoes and spices in a taco. Hmmm?, in the John gospel there are no parables at all because instead it contains long metaphorical stories or allegories, (all sorts of long theological wishy-washy abstract ramblings in a way that nobody actually talks, which proves it’s just much later added fabulist theological agendas speeches for the anonymous writer’s audience of his novel, who were mainly just fellow cult members, again spread out over 3 years and not 1 year like the others, that’s a big problem), the anonymous author includes the older pagan philosophy and Greek word “Logos” (a technical term in Western philosophy beginning with Heraclitus, c. 535 – c. 475 BCE), and then applies it to the Jesus character as well as other Gnosticism and mystery religions concepts and ideas, his mother Mary isn’t even mentioned by name in John and the reader doesn’t much know anything about his mother but he does mention Joseph as the father, there’s absolutely no birth nativity story at all, no birth town location is mentioned either just only that he appeared from the great outer space nebulous beyond where he always existed. (the author(s) of the John gospel dis the Mother of God basically and are coming across as heretics, and not only that by omitting it they basically destroy Christmas, the Christmas tree, wreathes, holly and ivy, mistletoe and garlands, holiday cakes and pastries, candy canes, brandies and spiced wines, (the cakes and candy canes can be said to even be literally crushed under the sandals of the writers of John), traditional Christmas Pork Tenderloin and shrimp and crab appetizers, hanging stockings, traditional holiday skiing vacation packages and the sleigh riding also is denigrated in the process, without these various cherished traditions included from the ancient Croatians pagan times then you might as well just be Jewish, Muslim, Baha’i, Mormon or a Jehovah’s Witness). Actually without all these ancient Croatian and pagan times traditions and customs, everybody would just be sitting around all the time waiting to be turned into floating into outer space zombies, and there wouldn’t even be pork tenderloin roasts, garlic butter fried shrimp pasta, cabbage rolls or bacon-crab salads invented either which is unthinkable. But there’s a lot more very suspicious contradictions and chicanery going on that’s for sure., lots more. More about these and other related topics at https://www.jesusneverexisted.com/.
Really WOW your friends and families and future followers at parties with these neat tricks (there’s nothing better than hosting a private party magic show everyone knows that).
As a matter of fact, most if not probably all of the “miracles” attributed to the Jesus character in the various gospels novels narratives, have been done before by other magic-men and god-men saviors for many centuries already, so nothing new or original there. Yes including even the dying and rising and raising others from the grave tricks were done a number of times before and they were popular ones with the fans and followers of the legends and stories. As just one example, the turning water into wine trick, again found only in the John gospel, was just a borrowed story of Dionysus’ miracle-working. Turning water into wine was included in the feats of the Greek god of wine Dionysus, and his Roman counterpart Bacchus, going back already to 1500 BCE. The story was already well known and popular in the Greek speaking parts of ancient Palestine especially 2,000 years ago, because being able to perform those famous wine-miracle and various ancient tricks miracles meant you were a real somebody who should be followed and/or worshipped as a saviour. DM Murdock points out other similarities between Jesus and Dionysus: “The Greek god of wine, Dionysus, the Roman Bacchus, also called Iacchus, has been depicted as having been born of a virgin mother on December 25th; performing miracles such as changing water into wine; appearing surrounded by or one of 12 figures; bearing epithets such as “Only Begotten Son” and “Savior”; dying; resurrecting after three days; and ascending into heaven.” (DM Murdock). Later I’ll include more evidences and interesting facts that most people don’t know about, clearly explaining how this whole topic of dying and rising saviours, magic-men saviours resurrecting and resurrecting the dead followers and many more extremely similar parallels, was already a common narrative theme and had been going on already for many, many centuries in ancient Canaan, Mesopotamia and throughout the Levant area, and elsewhere.
And then when you get to Paul of Acts and various epistles and letters writings (or whoever or what anonymous people wrote it over time including the forged epistles) it enters the realm of bizarro-world even more. All sorts of unreasinable travelings, superhero and magical events and places that don’t add up or make sense, time sequence, geographical, political and military situations errors all over the place. The Paul character who up till then was an assassin basically and arresting for Jewish Pharisees and High Priest for years, but laughingly suddenly has a mental meltdown and delusion vision of a bright light and hears a voice in his head giving him messages, and presto-magico Saul is now “Mr Know-it-all Christian preacher guru guy Paul”, forget about all his previous shenanigans he’s now a swell Mr. Christian super-salesman, how just peachy terrific! Paul then goes around traveling and supposedly writing letters (more like books than letters, which btw only rich people or powerful politicians/rulers types could afford to mail around the ancient world, there were no cheap postal and parcel services and postal trucks back then) to churches that didn’t even exist at the time, and very, very strangely he doesn’t even mention the life of any Jesus ever, not even once, he just starts going on and on and one with all sorts of new weird abstract concepts, new theologies and new weird esoteric mystery analogies instead (to small anonymous groups of illiterate yokels spread around here and there?), and he never writes or speaks about any Jesus character being born or walking and living on the earth or doing miracles or healing anybody or anything. That’s right, incredibly as it sounds Paul knows absolutely nothing about the things written in any of the later 4 gospels (which were written much, much later into even the next century anyway), but he instead is preaching about some sort of ethereal otherworldly “Phantasm-Jesus” who’s always existed as if he never physically even walked the earth ever. Paul gets into theological fights and disagreements with some of the real disciples of Jesus who were still living (according to the narrative novel story anyway, even raising from the dead himself after being stoned and left for dead, like getting up and brushing the dust off your clothes after slipping on a banana peel, wow), and he tells them he doesn’t know anything about their Jesus that they spent years living and eyewitnessing with supposedly, instead he proclaims that he knows the real Jesus inside news scoop because of his mentally delusional vision episode and his new “feelings” and “hunches” and voices in his head, and similar absurdity just goes on and on in circles. Paul is just making things up and doesn’t even have a clue what any Jesus character said or did on earth or whether he was even born at all as a man and lived on earth, he only just knows and talks about Phantasm-Jesus who’s somewhere in outer space (sort of like Casper the ghost Jesus and that’s all he knows, he knows nothing about a real Casper-Jesus life spent on earth and doesn’t even seem to care, as if it didn’t happen). Basically it doesn’t take a genius or much common sense and logic to soon come to the conclusion that what one is reading in all these competing and contradictory narratives is not any sort of recorded real people and real history events or documented reality, but instead just made-up fiction and theological fables novels inserted into a a real historical time period and place that grew over centuries, and then edited over centuries repeatedly and mutating. Constant editing, revisions, adding information and changing information and editing again. But that’s what you do only to fiction stories and not real documented history/biography books about real people and events, (aka theological edits, it’s the already preexistent or thought out ideas, theologies and related doctrines that are the main thing…the rest is just all filler that can be redacted, edited and played around with…which they did), otherwise we can start writing that Christopher Columbus discovered Antarctica and invented the first walrus taco, and that Vikings discovered California and founded Hollywood, we could today even start writing that JFK was an alien in a human body but was killed by alien enemies who arrived from sector LZ-37.9203 of the Xardia Galaxy at the Outer Rim, that’s right Oswald was actually a sent “Interceptor” alien-hybrid also in human form, but luckily JFK escaped at the very last second and teleported to some other body, rumoured to be Jim Morrison (and if it’s written then it must obviously be real history and facts, proof or no proof it was anonymously written somewhere by somebody so just have faith that it’s verily true).
God Said It…I Believe It…That Settles It…You mean that’s in the book? (Yep the seeds of all later Abrahamic religions. Really not that surprising since a bunch of people we don’t even know who they are kept adding a bunch of made-up stories and crazy ideas for their own agendas and growing blood-magic voodoo religion societies in desert tents thousands of years ago). That’s right, full of all sorts of “God-Commanded” destruction, mass murdering, genocides against men, women and children, infanticides, condoned slaves owning and severe beatings, sanctified rapes, selling daughters as sex-slaves, acceptable sacrificings including killing own children, other numerous plagues, stonings, sacrificings, beheadings, burnings, yummy cannibalism of own children and much more various smitings and absurdity guidelines as commanded and required by the book’s plot main “god” character, aka Yahweh/Jehovah/Lord and a bunch of other names and titles it likes to be known by (However NEVER ONCE does he say he wants to be known by the name “God” interestingly, just by the other names). As stated in one of the below videos, if people actually lived their lives according to and followed every required biblical command and rule guideline as commanded, and/or even supported the written rules and guidelines, they would be the most vile and despicable criminals in every country in the entire world. More about these topics later with examples.
God Said It…I Believe It…That Settles It…The genocidal, jealous, repenting, angry, smiting and sacrifices demanding Yahweh-Jehovah-God of the Hebrew bible/Old Testament, would actually make an excellent supervillain being in many modern day comic books and movies, he’s also Jesus supposedly according to some bible theologians, or at least his old man anyway, or whatever.
Also, if your “God” is the same “God” that ISIS, Taliban and other similar God-talkers and fundamentalists are always talking about it (which it really is after all, it’s all parts of the same storybooks and characters and plot twists, they’re all Abrahamic offshoot religions and cults from the same source ultimately), then you are actually in league with them and support their “God.” It’s the same god and plots you are talking about after all. You are quite simply supporting “their God” who is “your God” also, so why the heck are you acting like an infidel? This makes you a very dangerous and confused subversive person, shame on you. Besides, I will show later using their very own sources and beliefs that “God” didn’t make the world or universe at all like many suppose and think is some kind of scriptural based truth or truthiness, (according to the book’s plot text the “Elohim” did, as in “Gods” plural, a whole bunch of them actually, even the bible says so right there in front of people’s nose), so people are really quite confused and don’t even know what they’re talking about at all. Just babbling nonsense really, talking to rainbows and clouds about nonsense dreamed up and just chatting about personal thoughts and fiction stories which amount to and mean absolutely nothing in reality. Many of them are Rumpelstiltskins giving beans to Little Red Riding Hood and Jack, and they have many lurking Trolls and Ghouls working for them, the worst kind of trolls and ghouls too, the kind that are trying to convince you that reality is fake and that concocted subversive identity destroying drivel garbage is real. You might as well then believe that getting tuberculosis or being born blind is a good thing and a wonderful blessing, that staring at the sun is good for your eyes, drinking bleach quenches thirst better than any cola etc.
Jonah swallowed by the fish for 3 days with no oxygen and he wasn’t digested or even drown WOW! Awwww how cute cartoonish that’s the cutest big fish I ever saw, no wonder he was one of Jesus’ favorite superheroes, I bet if Job tickled his chin he could easily whistle “Gimme That Ol’ Time Religion” with his blowhole and be heard all the way to Galilee GLO-RY!). Also when you start’em off on the route, start with the cartoon characters and all their wacky zany impossible magical adventures and pointless shenanigans, coloring books are a great idea because they don’t have to think much while using crayons, whatever you do don’t buy the coloring books about the other stuff mentioned previously above and especially not as bedtime stories books, no, no no, whatever you do don’t do that.
…”And God said go through the city and kill without compassion or pity, slaughter the old men, the young men and women, the mothers and children”…good night now and sleep well, tomorrow I’ll read you about Joshua’s great stopping the earth and moon orbiting and rotating for a full day magic trick to defeat the Amorites.
Now, I’m not the type to get up on a soapbox and preach anything to anybody, and especially go around telling people to believe something just because, just because I said so, just because some person said so, just because some person’s nephew’s cousin neighbour’s friend who read that it said so in a book somewhere attributed to someone a long, long time ago somewhere during the Bronze Age. I’m not going to tell you that supposedly the mind/deity behind a cloud of dust and gas quasar that is 30 billion times bigger than the sun and more than 20 billion light years away, suddenly decided to appear in the distant past in a desert tent in the form of a puff of smoke to give out precise rules and guidelines about how to properly make burnt offerings, in the desert where there is no wood or grass for animals to eat, when to pick up sticks , slaves owning and punishing rules, correct hairstyles and fashions rules, important rules about women’s menstruation cycles and clean and unclean animals and which animals are acceptable as burnt offerings which the god will think has nicer aroma reaching his nostrils and a bunch of other very specific weird rules and guidelines.
Why? What’s the point? What great thing did they do or knowledge learned or feats accomplished? They just fished or wandered around being shepherds or something for over 900 years? There’s just no point to be able to live over 9 centuries for no reason or to not at least write 1 measly book, If you lived over 900 years and just died as a nothing then you’re pointless and an abomination.
(You see, it could make galaxies trillions of miles wide, and billions of light years away, massive black holes that are billions of times more massive than our sun and an incredible amount of other things in the cosmos, but for some strange reason it was suddenly very important to give out specific and exact burnt offerings rules from inside a tent in the desert somewhere and the other long list of strange weird rules, but also strangely only to 1 guy, only certain types of birds too, you can’t burn just any bird as a burnt offering after all, it must always and at all times only be special types of birds or other animals, only those birds are the ones you can burn. WHATEVER YOU DO YOU MUST NOT BURN THE OTHER BIRDS! GOD WANTS YOU TO BURN THE GOOD SMELLING CLEAN BIRDS AND NOT THOSE OTHER STINKY UNCLEAN BIRDS!!! (IT’S BETTER AROMA BECAUSE THEY’RE CLEANER BIRDS). Nope, I’m not going to tell you any of that. But if you’re the inquisitive type that likes to find out about plots in books and dissect the suspension of disbelief from reality, then hit on these few links just to wet yourwhistle. You’ll find out information right from the horse’s mouth so to speak, directly from the grandaddy of all later faith crusades, bacon-dancers and purveyors of pamphlets that will basically make all these televangelist types look like even worse actors, and their fans from their filth circus tours will then probably want to demand a double, triple and quadruple portion of faith seed harvest miracles for their mailed in envelope seeds. Just a few links below that give lots more true and real background information about the fake, invented, ideas based on fictions and various (anonymous) writer’s deceit, lies, fabrications and personal whims information that largely makes up biblical text…
It’s just really miraculous how so many failed and disgraced spurious scamvangelists come back from the dead to legions of more supporting lackeys and their faith seeds. Jim Bakker began working at Pat Robertson’s Christian Broadcasting Network (no big suprise there, it’s a temple lair grooming ground for scamvangelists, in cahoots with 100 Huntley Street and 700 Club Canada) and he helped make The 700 Club before co-founding the Trinity Broadcasting Network with Paul and Jan Crouch and then starting his own The PTL Club on the air and later opening his Heritage USA American Christian-themed water park-theme park, eventually after sex scandals, shady and criminal fundraising activities where he also pocketed millions for himself from ministry donations, mail fraud and wire fraud etc, he was sentenced to 45 years in prison (although I won’t hold the sex scandal against him because we’re talking about Tammy Faye after all, who’s one half of the infernal diabolical duo with Jan Crouch who used to wear a pink poodle or on her head at times which is disturbing). But he’s back from the dead again with a new show with a millennial, survivalist focus and sells buckets of freeze-dried food to his audience in preparation for the end of days (He also admitted that the first time he actually read the bible completely from start to finish was while he was in prison, and he still doesn’t understand it lol). Basically the moral of the story is once a scamvangelist, always a scamvangelist, and that there are lots of gullible lackeys ready and willing to support them for a chance of immortality. How does the soup taste Jim? Do you think it will still be good when the hordes of locusts with stinging scorpion’s tails and speaking with voices like thunder and dragons arrive to torment people for 5 months? *UPDATE – even as I’m writing this recently the Missouri Attorney General’s Office filed a lawsuit against Bakker and his Morningside Church Productions for advertising and selling his fake “Silver Solution” miraculous coronavirus cure treatment, he’s now asking viewers for cash to avoid bankruptcy and most recently on his “Jim Bakker Show” he’s warning about coming zombie attacks on Earth and of an asteroid that will hit Earth in 2029 bringing on the Antichrist.* I don’t make this stuff up.
The Jim Bakker Show is basically just one of a cornucopia of sites and places for fraudsters, mentally imbalanced patients and delusional people to avoid real world issues and instead step further into their personally invented “Jesusland” and “Bibleland” universes to sell their books and DVDs for faith shekels. Twitter screenshot.
God’s prophet is in need of faith shekels people! Lets make the miracle happen!
…Look, what are you going to write? Are you going to start your book with the mighty magic Leprechaun making Billy Bob on a Thursday who then jumps on his horse leaving town, he gets lost in a storm, eats some grub that the mighty magic Leprechaun gave him and then he meets Petunia on a Saturday. But then just a few sentences later instead write that it was the mighty magic Hillbilly that made Billy Bob and Petunia on a Monday who both left town on their horse, ate some grub that the mighty magic Hillbilly gave them and then they both got lost in a storm on a Friday? You can’t write contradictory accounts like this in your novel, nope. You won’t make any sense or sell lots of books or have people believe you using that kind of formula that’s for sure, especially right from the start of your novel or book. They can’t both be right, it’s one or the other. In my military days this example, and many other similar scenarios of contradictions in the written material stories, we would call a snafu or fubar and one major clusterfuck. The reader will be left scratching their head and wondering 5 minutes into the book just what kind of obtuse fool wrote this thing anyway?…then go buy a Stephen King novel or a book about painters or artists or even comic books instead.
So what does all this “televangelism” and “preachin’ the word” really mean anyway’? Do many of the preachers even know or even know what they’re preaching about and saying? Not really, televangelism is a series of deluded mutating contradictory anonymous gospels-novels fables meanings with mostly personal invented pretend world fluff meanings, ad hoc rationalizing and invented ideas and concepts which just amounts to pointless humanoid verbal diarrhea. The preachers on the left and rap musical artist on the right (roles reversed to keep the biblical contradictions, bullshitism and absurdity pretend world theme continuity), with their Jesus bling are part of the same anti-civilizational filth, dross and personality/reality destroying cults modus operandi mentioned at the beginning of this post and up to here, I think the fucked in the head specimens are probably minions of and in cahoots with Joyce Meyers and Kenneth Copeland without a doubt how could they not be. The god-o-tainment business sure is just a lot of infomercials but without anything tangible and real being talked about, instead just anarcho-communist mind control filth doctrines and invented abstract concepts theologies. And like I said near the beginning, to be the purveyor-preacher many times you don’t even have to know anything about the bible or even know what you’re talking about, just only memorize a few verses written by someone somewhere at sometime that you cherry picked here and there and then just make stuff up all over the place, you’ll control their minds and brains in no time.
Without even getting into the Old Testament yet and the Septuagint, the New Testament manuscripts fragments remains of the oldest and earliest anonymously written gospels and letters/epistles were all written in Greek many decades removed from the supposed narrative novels time period and intended only for other very small Greek speaking and writing cult members audiences in other far off areas, which means we don’t even know who really wrote the material and that if televangelists really want to quote accurately and understand meanings then they really should be doing it in Greek or from the Greek written sources and not from KJV bible English. Of the over 90 different and theologically contradictory gospels, books, epistles, scrolls, letters and codexes circulating in the Middle East during the 1st and 2nd century long before the invention of the bible, most of them were also written in Greek (Not to mention the numerous other contemporaneous and preceding directly related and infuencing esoteric mystery religions, pagan philosophies and gnostic theologies texts and scrolls written in Hebrew and Aramaic and even Latin and Greek again, basically televangelists and telescamvangelists who then can’t refer to the earliest NT Greek written sources and their actual meanings (especially in context) then just come across as even more absurd, ignorant and pointless lying obscurantist fabulist cultists who are nefariously intentionally attempting to limit further inquiry and understanding of reality and the real world solely for their own personal universe whims, agendas and faith seeds envelopes). Even just the anonymously written gospels fragments can only be dated by bible scholars “with confidence” only back to the 3rd century (circa 200 CE), and then any “hypothetical possible” earlier composition versions of the texts scenario from anywhere between 80 CE to 140 CE with various degrees of dating disagreements (and fragments content importantly, so many contradictory texts and fragments floating around that we don’t even know what the earliest believers would have believed or what they wrote, however we have a growing amount of clues and evidences about some of the earliest beliefs which was very, very different, so different that fabulist fakery televangelists would be shocked to their core), yet even still they were anonymously written in Greek and admit themselves they were not eyewitnesses and they don’t tell or explain what their sources are anyway, plus in retrospect the Jesus character is literally absent from historical sources and contemporaneous writer’s views in the area and basically an invisible man for those almost 300 years (and especially not a peep by any writer from the time he would have supposedly lived and wowing many thousands, just only…..crickets) before the massive mutating and redacting and thelogical fabulizing around Constantine’s time, which would be at least 100 years before Oral Roberts, Kenneth Copeland and Billy Graham came along. On top of that according to the laws given to Moses that’s punishable by death and so it even makes televangelists outright diabolical by tricking people to voluntarily go to hell along with them and burn in flames (or even worse like walking barefoot on thumbtacks for probably weeks and months or maybe even longer and then jumping into a pool of vinegar) while foolishly thinking that they’re instead going to the outer space clouds to get wings, new sandals and sing in a choir eternally. Basically televangelist types think they’re carrying the bible preaching mantle of Billy Graham from the 1950’s and everything before that is not that important. Image: thecalvinist.net
Along with other characters and deeds such as Noah, Daniel, Ezekiel, Job, Jonah and many others that were already shared in fables in various ways by different peoples and cultures in the Middle East, comes along another one known as the ridiculous Abram/Abraham character fable, who according to the story was an earlier rich wandering traveling many camels and slaves owning Babylonian magus sorcerer guru from Ur of the Chaldeans/Mesopotamia (i.e. Iraq), who absurdly according to many biblical apologists is even supposed to be the founding father patriarch of Christians, Jews, Jehovah’s Witnesses, Mormons, Baháʼí and Muslims etc…Yawwwn (as well as being the great great great great great etc grandfather of the Jesus character, all these anonymous writers are the world’s best genealogy writer’s also btw just top-notch amazing), which is also a huge problematic contradictory conundrum fiasco that’s very absurd and sounds made up. According to the deranged and ridiculously absurd fable the master of the cosmos decided one day to just appear in a vision to this one guy, just him and nobody else on the entire spinning dirtball in space planet for some reason, and then it makes a bunch of prophetic promises to just him and tells Abraham how to burn and sacrifice animals for desert blood magic rituals etc (Why? because like I said this god only floats and hangs around the Middle East deserts as his territorial stomping ground which is the universe so screw the rest of the planet, and this god strangely always has a big hard on about ancient Canaan for some weird reason, Canaan this, Canaan that, you’re gonna own all of Canaan bla bla bla…Why? just because I guess). Besides numerous absurd and ridiculous statements and events that transpire in the fable narrative, this god also decides to make a ‘”Covenant of the Pieces” with Abraham, where after more god commanded animal sacrifices and desert blood magic and telling Abraham to start following the Egyptian custom of circumcision etc, this god then says that Abraham’s descendants will be given lands from the river of Egypt to the river Euphrates (in Iraq) as well as lands of the Kenites and the Kenizzites, and the Kadmonites, and the Hittites, and the Perizzites, and the Rephaites, and the Amorites, and the Canaanites, and the Girgashites, and the Jebusites (the larger part of the entire Middle East basically as the Promised Land of Israel, wow, good luck with that because many camels, oxen, goats and sheep will not be impressed that’s for sure, stressing again about how he’s going to “give them” (lol, does it come with a deed and all stamped documents in order I wonder?) always the ancient land of Canaan again constantly like some neurotic politician jimble jamble, it’s just really weird how this newly appearing desert god is so fixated with this desert area and just this one guy and screw the rest of the planet), but not only that, this god “promises” Abraham that his descendants will be sooo numerous and as countless as the stars in the sky and dust of the earth and of course eventually rule over ancient Canaan, again with the ancient Canaan obsession fixation of course (the large version Greater Canaan I should note), it’s a really important thing or something because he has to make sure Abe and his peeps will rule Canaan. Well that sure didn’t work out now did it? It’s much more like the opposite happened actually, it’s at least 6 religions and there’s also way, way, way more even just Chinese and Indian populations than Jews anyway (the last time I checked anyway, and I’m positive they’re not all gonna travel to Jerusalem along with the entire world to worship their Yahweh-Jehovah tribal deity according to their failed prophecies), also Israel sure isn’t as large as stretching from Egypt to Iraq and all the areas in between where the mentioned other peoples lived (example, but then again you have to remember this god didn’t even know there was a talking snake in his garden or where Adam was or even know what the heck was even going on, absolutely clueless and just a big contradictory talker it seems with the list of wrong and failed promises, prophecies and contradictions just snowballing further). The new on the scene big guy also decides to play a morbid game of ‘if you love me prove it and kill and sacrifice your son’, seriously can it even get more demented and warped right from the start after meeting the new voice in his head?, this god needs love and so practically overnight wants his new #1 handpicked peep to show him some really good loyal love, he had to really know that Abe really really really loved him, now that’s just really morbid rubbish but then there’s lots more farcical nonsensical adventure stories shenanigans later…
In the OT story of Abraham and Sarah, she was such a sexy 90 year old desert babe among all the desert babes in all the lands that even the Pharaoh and a Canaanite King had to lustfully with passion have her for their very own. Good ol’ lucky Abraham.
…such as including, (for comedic relief? yeah surely that has to be it, it’s OT comedic relief probably, from the monotony of Yahweh-Jehovah’s wrathful killing, smiting, blasting, zapping, banishing, drowning, blood magics sacrificing speeching, cannibalism endorsing, genocides supporting, babies murdering, failed prophesying etc) the episodes of a Pharaoh and the Canaanite Philistine King Abimelech who both for some weird reason wanted his wife as theirs because they thought she’s a babe among the fairest of babes in all the lands, but hold on a second there’s a big problem here and something is not quite right…because at the first scene with Pharaoh she’s about 75 years old and later with King Abimelech she’s over…90 years old!, lol (I kid you not the movies have it all wrong just like the 2 vs. 14 animals on the Ark and Joshua’s sun and moon stopping trick thing, she must have did lots of yoga and aerobics and had a secret recipe anti-wrinkle and cellulite cream, or it was just very slim pickings back then for their many wives, concubines and harems). Perhaps even more bizarre though, or at least equally as bizarre, is that according to the “biblical scripture text” Abraham lived to be 175 years old and he was blessed by Shem who was a son of Noah (yep that Noah), and Shem lived to be 600 years old, Noah lived 950 years including 350 years after the flood and Shem lived up to 500 years after the flood, which would then mean that Abraham, Noah and Shem lived as contemporaries as in living at the same time on earth and in the same general area for 58 years! and that Shem even outlived Abraham by 35 years! pfff as if the reader just fell off the dufus pumpkin truck, I don’t make this stuff or the dinosaurs up (Photo: Garo Nalbandian).
TOTALLY NOT DELUSIONAL OR A SPURIOUS FABULIST CHARLATAN. Oh puhleeez! Tell us what the book of Deuteronomy all says and commands there spurious Morris ol’ chap, we need to know them cherry picked biblical financial manual truths oh please explain for us, (actually it wasn’t intended for you or me that’s for sure, according to the stories-novels plot it was sermon speeches by Moses he delivered to the Israelites before their entering the promised land to start their military ethnic cleansing, slaughtering and genocides campaigns, you just gotta love that obscurant cherry picking and delusional fabulist invented meanings and alternate realities). It’s really amazing there are actually millions of people who believe this swindler’s performance trickster shtick and actually do send him money, delusional psychotic verbal diarrhea much? Also, I wonder if they made a brief side visit to any hospital or any sick kids hospital during the magical miraculous “mission”? No, I didn’t think so, like I said just a pure trash filth carnival show (I’m positive he’s burning and being eaten by worms in the hell he believes in and made for himself without a doubt).
Talk about a Christian Voodoo Trash Filth Parade of pointless vile worthless rubbish specimens if there ever was. “And the LORD said, I will destroy man whom I have created from the face of the earth; both man, and beast, and the creeping things, and the fowls of the air; for it repenteth me that I have made them.”…(self explanatory, I’d repent inventing this group of rubbish creeping despicable specimens too, I’d smite them all for wasting good fresh air that can be used for much more productive things, besides as already explained they verily must be put to death anyway because it’s even their god’s written command when it comes to these fakery things), I guess you could call this a sort of a “London Maggotfest” fit for a queen. Just look at them they verily are lying conmen specimens purveyorsof filth and that’s a fact, just take a look at just some of the fraudster’s names highlighting this filth carnival of conniving scoundrels…Kenneth Copeland, Creflo Dollar (or whatever his name is now) says alot and especially the despicable disgusting proven fraudster fake faith healer/shekels beggar Morris Cerullo who headlined the event for Cripe’s Pete’s sake. He’s the guy who sells “anointed Holy Ghost handkerchiefs” and even his own “Financial Breakthrough Bible” and DVDs, he’s regularly taken to court for fraudulent fundraising practices, income tax evasion, fakery all over the place and mostly travels preaching money-centered theologies (see video above), he bought Jim Bakker’s fallen PTL television network, theme park and properties and then used the many millions of donations money as his own in supporting his lavish lifestyle, which is the norm with these lying maggots charlatans. He says as a child he was led by two angelic beings; transported to heaven for a face-to-face meeting with God; claims he has the ability to predict the future; can heal the sick; and has even told audiences when they look at him they “are looking at God” and tons of other mentally unbalanced absurd ideas, psycho much?…LOL. (and like I mention at a Jack Van Impe video later, all of Europe already has tons of churches all over the place, some going back to medieval times and well over a thousand years old, where the hell does he and his minions think churches in North America all came from? Them going to preach their “Christianity” to these countries is as ridiculous as them going to China to preach-teach them how to make Chinese food, to India to preach-teach them how to make tandoori chicken, to Germany to teach them how make knockwurst, to France to teach them crêpes suzette recipes or to Mexico to preach-teach them how to make tacos and burritos, these types of “missions” are really only just blatant Euro-shekels donations and financial schemes and that’s it). Yep definitely a pukey “Maggotsmission to London” that’s for sure. But on second thought he did talk face-to-face with god in heaven and he does actually look impressive standing there with that open book always pointing impressively and he sure does know how to fool imbeciles into sending him money and believing him so maybe you better mail in some faith harvest cheque-seeds just to be sure).
As another relevant example but closer to home so to speak, is the case of the various North American Native People’s cultures, history and traditions. In this case the nefarious televangelists and swindlerscamvangelists such as Billy Graham, John Hagee, Pat Robertson, Joyce Meyer, Joel Olsteen, Creflo Dollar, Morris Cerullo, Richard Roberts and the festering plethora of others, would like nothing better than to have Native Peoples ditch and discard their ancient ancestral customs and traditions and to instead follow their own televangelized invented personal brand of Bronze Age and Iron Age deserts blood magic filth beliefs, i.e. – to cast aside their personal cherished ancient history to instead worship some alien foreign tribal deity along with the various included Mesopotamian, Egyptian, Zoroastrian and other Levant religions hell tortures, demons, lakes of fire, zombifications and other abstract concepts beliefs and customs, and all just for the sake of filling their personal telescamvangelist temple coffers with Native People’s shekels, and strangely to even expect them to be happy and grateful to do it (like giving the hangman some rope he’ll just use to hang them with, what a great deal if you live in bizarro world). To absurdly support people who literally want to steal their minds and real world much older history? Why the heck should or would they want to voluntarily commit murder against their very own selves and their existence and then even pay charlatan scammers to help them do it? That would be blasphemy against the very planet, common sense and murder of nature and even verily the murder of their fathers and their father’s fathers and of their father’s father’s father’s father’s fathers and even including all their oxen, camels, pigeons, sheep, goats and donkeys etc (there are even cases of people absurdly pretending to be Native Peoples for preposterous reasons which is just plain pathetic). No amount of Bronze Age and Iron Age desert blood magic witchcraft could forgive that unpardonable sin that’s for sure (basically even after having lands and territory stolen from them for centuries, as well as massacres and ethnic cleansing (some of which would even make the prophets Joshua and Muhamud proud and likewise their god very pleased), and their cultures, customs and traditions being under threat also, but now the galavanting conniving hocus pocus fabulist preaching telescamvangelist nephilims want to zombify and fornicate with their souls and then afterwards even take that as well, as a trophy for some sort of invented obscurantist Zion theologies agendas rubbish, that is just pure and simple heinous infernal filth diabolism no matter what mental gymnastics are used to attempt to trick people to think otherwise). Image: crazycrow.com.
Another example of what I’m talking about from a whole bunch of similar examples, proof that the whole “Goin’ a Preachin'” overseas televangelist schemes are nothing but blatant faith-shekels seeds tours for a personal temples coffers harvest subterfuge and real estate/books publishing deals, be it the already mentioned Mormons, Jehovah’s Witnesses, other cults and sects or in this case like the above “Mission to London” filth circus shows” (see also Jack Van Impe video later), for example the African Bubal tribe’s testicles won’t even allow them to put on underwear because of eating menstrual secretions from cattle and there are other tribes that ritually drink and bathe in cow’s urine and cover themselves in burned dung ashes, yet the know it all Mormons, Jehovah’s Witnesses, televangelists and other subversive sects are going around Europe erecting plastic brainwashing pools, holding hocus pocus drivel circus shows and handing out pamphlets to convert the foreign imported beers and wines drinkers? In Europe of all places to save their souls and shekels, traveling to Europe which already has tons of churches and cathedrals all over the place like I said, some going back to medieval times and even well over a thousand years old, where the hell do these traveling televangelists/ fabulist gurus and their buffoon minions think churches in North America all came from anyway? Them going to preach their “Christianity” or hold fakery “missions” in these countries is as ridiculous as them going to China to preach-teach them how to make Chinese food, to India to preach-teach them how to make tandoori chicken, to Germany to teach them how make knackwurst, to France to teach them crêpes suzette recipes or to Mexico to preach-teach them how to make tacos and burritos. They’re trying to equate these customs with the Zagreb Film Festival?, Karlovac Dani Piva? Oktoberfest? Cinco de Mayo, Roncesvalles Polish Festival? French Medieval de Sedanetc Festival? Rijeka Carnival, Venice Carnival?, etc and so on and needing their bs holy ghost gabbing powers wisdom and invented magical realities, and so instead they’re going to foreign European countries to attempt to mind control snatch people’s brains, their histories, identities, civilizations and importantly their faith shekels seeds from the art galleries, ice cream parlours, cafes, restaurants and hair salons for just their own personal temple coffers and books publishers? lol, that’s absolutely laughably absurd, it’s as logical common sense as trying to sell bottled sand in the desert markets or selling snowballs to the Inuit people in Arctic regions that’s how dumb and pointless. Televangelists especially should instead verily be bringing more awareness to their concerts and so-called missions about the lack of tailored pants and bathtubs predicament in just these cases, there are many other similar scenarios on the continent (strangely with even cases of Americans permanently emigrating there to join and follow these African folk customs traditions because they think it’s exotic or whatever), but nope they gotta go get harvest faith seeds in London or Paris, Rome, Prague or Munich etc instead, just ridiculous bs priorities and shekels saving missions schemes. Woe and shame on you vile lying nefarious televangelists! You care more about envelopes, jet planes, toupes, restaurant reservations, plastic surgery, selling DVDs and books (hardcover and paperback of course), your own temple coffers blessings, various microphone and fabulist rigmarole and personal feelings and hunches couch gabbing sessions, sometimes even trying to find satanic penises in cartoons and demonic sweaters on the rack in stores, you despicable charlatans need to take the camel dung out of your own eye and tent first before buying your blasphemous television fancy pants and diabolical sweaters for your own camels and temple tents! GLO-RY!). Images: pinterest.com/dailymail.co.uk/
I could go on and on with examples all day, but lastly the Japanese example about its identity, beliefs, culture and traditions goes without saying, which makes recent televangelist’s and like-minded charlatans attempts to make inroads in Japan even more nefariously disturbing (and they even already have their own history of various demons, ghosts, kami, obake, yōkai, yūrei and other legendary creatures in their folkloric mythology, so there’s no need for a new lucifer-satan-diabolus-devil character and related Middle Eastern hocus pocus demons and talking snakes etc, however many televangelists and their minions would disagree and instead retort that NO…the Japanese NEED to believe in ONLY the Abrahamic biblical diabolus-lucifer-satans-devils, spirits and demons and not their own, ONLY the Levant area devils, deities, creatures and demons are the real ones to believe in for a future Zoroastrian zombification immortality). Are the touring scamvangelist circus charlatan jimble jamble and fake healings shows people trying to tell me and people living in the real world that the many centuries long traditions and culture of the Japanese need to change their temple coffers to foreign filth deserts voodoo temple coffers? Pfff that’s ridiculous, why? are they trying to imply that their ramen noodles are actually serpentine demons inspired soup heresies and pork and shellfish transgressions and that those geisha girls performance artists, ninjas and samurais, karate and judo practitioners are also just only unbelieving Canaanites, Jebusites and Moabites doomed to the Egyptian lake of fire? Why the heck should they or even want to discard their many centuries and thousands of years of culture and traditions to instead follow Mesopotamian, Egyptian, Zoroastrian and other Levant religions inspired blood magic hocus pocus and zombifications worldviews behaviorisms? Why should they throw away their identity and personalities to instead jump into an Egyption lake of fire and actually become a real-life tempura fried entrée for foreign heavenly fiends and demons for other Zoroastrian inspired temple coffers? That would make no sense especially since the biblical god couldn’t even outsmart a measly reptile. I unequivocally guarantee that just like the ancient Hyperboreans example, that the Japanese were never at any time even in the biblical universe requiring blood magic sorcery anyway and that the biblical god didn’t even know there were Japanese in the universe. Image: gotokyo.org/timeout.com
I don’t know, this was just floating around the internet when Googling “televangelists fake”, I don’t know what the heck it all means so you tell me (although an admonition example about the side effects of being over 30 and still living with your parents could be a plausible explanation, or just make up your own caption and CD).
You will also notice, well I do anyway because I learned to read when I was kid, that the increase of these types of tricksters performers on television seems to coincide with the increase in shootings, stabbings, scandals and just crime in general. If anything, one will notice that with these types the answer seems to be to not talk about it or mention it or look into it, but rather just fill more television slots with their programs and more so-called crusades wherever they can, and of course just write more books. All this then just increases the crimes and scandals rates, the vortex spins around and around ever faster and everything just stays the same but gets increasingly worse by increments. How’s that for irony?
If someone wrote something, wrote it somewhere at some time in some language and you can verily see that it’s written, written with actual real ink on actual real papyrus then you have to admit that it’s undeniable proof that it’s 100% true, how can anyone deny this fact? Don’t you have to admit that it’s verily written right there in front of you and as real as the nose on your face? Denying this fact or even being skeptical is just plain unbelieving heretical foolishness. If a letter is written by some anonymous writer to another small anonymous clique of religious sect members somewhere going from point A to point B and it’s full of abstract concepts, magical hocus pocus fictions, alternate universe theologies ramblings and failed predictions etc, then obviously the anonymous written personal letter and his ideas and delusions are 100% true and should apply to the entire planet isn’t that a fact? If some anonymous writer thousands of years ago in the Levant deserts somewhere wrote up some characters and magical hocus pocus events, obscure primitive thinking tribal behaviorisms and other failed predictions and wrong information etc, it should obviously be applied to every human and humanoid person living on the entire planet no questions asked, this is undeniable and it would be foolishness to question or deny isn’t that right? (But just some of the parts not all of the parts, along with later invented and changed parts).
“They shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing it shall not hurt them.” is found in some bibles in the gospel novel of Mark 16:17-18, however this text is part of Mark 16: 9–20 which is not found in the earliest manuscripts and was instead anonymously interpolated/inserted sometime in the 2nd century by someone somewhere, so why are some people still even today handling poisonous snakes and wearing overalls? Interesting to note also, the Yahweh-Jehovah snake-related punishment is recorded in Numbers 21:6-9, which apparently demonstrates that only he/it has ultimate power over serpents (and in the process over all evil and can send evil as he/it pleases). Very strangely however, not only did he send venomous snakes to punish the Israelites because of their ingratitude, but he also provided the means of a cure (i.e. – the bronze snake on a rod). It is noteworthy during this episode that the Israelites were required to gaze up at the bronze serpent to be cured, which is an obvious indication of the already existing traditions of pagan “Imitative Magic“, which is a magic based on the assumption that a desired result, person or thing can be supernaturally affected through mimicking it or through an object representing it (with other more fantastical examples to follow). Interestingly, this magic episode also shows a very evident parallel to the Ugaritic liturgy against venomous snakes as found in the Ugaritic Texts. Three texts from Ugarit, all of which address this problem of venomous snakes, suggest that the typical pagan solution was to search for a magic formula to counter the results of the venom by symbological imitative magic and/or incantations. Image: abcnews.
Also, what the hell do a bunch of stories by traveling old delusional gurus and men living in caves and desert tents or just living traveling vagabond lives, who actually made the bible centuries after the many versioned stories and characters were supposed to have existed yet never mentioned or recorded at the time, actually mean to me, me with a Croatian descent that has absolutely nothing to with those times and places and cultures and magical fables? Televangelists don’t even know how the things they speech about and or even know how any of the biblical material even came to be in existence, who wrote what at what time and which place and for what specific reason and to which audience it was actually meant for or the languages they were written in, yet they treat it like it was written by Jesus or God himself, they’re convinced because they believe it, they have the faith, they have the faith because they believe it and they believe it because it makes them have faith and don’t ask questions or waver or lose your faith. It’s ridiculous and delusional much? Even at the beginning these old men were constantly arguing and at odds with each other about who even this Jesus character is supposed to be, or if he even existed in reality as a real person, they didn’t really know so they just started inventing things, they weren’t even sure what his name was exactly. (Gospels were being written all over the place proclaiming to be a true gospel, dozens of them and more, various traveling gurus and apostles each one with the real gospel truths were writing early gospels all over the Levant).
And even just the less well-known case of Marcion (among many, many cases of early 1st and 2nd century intrigue, debates, arguments, disagreements, censures and heresy excommunications), which is something probably many have absolutely no clue about because it’s been censored and hushed-up for many centuries (among many other things), it’s very interesting though even from just the historical perspective for history buffs even if not interested in any of the religious views or beliefs, interesting for a number of very intriguing and important reasons that would probably piss of many televangelists especially. (Get ready to be mind blown so you might want to sit down and make some snacks and adult beverages first, I recommend a Martini or maybe a Jager Bomb, you can even order a few gallons of Jim Bakker’s creamy potato soup first if you want I don’t care)…
You mean Marcion and the Phantasm-Jesus was the very first New Testament and very first written gospel? And he even wrote the first original Gospel of Luke before it was changed and added onto with more fictions and contradictory fabrications aka Luke-Acts? Whoa!…
Because the early so-called “church father” Marcion was actually onto a good idea by finally being the very first person to decide to actually write things down in the late 1st to early 2nd century as a permanent record that people could actually read, (and according to his sources, which were the earliest known sources available at the time because the later 4 gospels weren’t even thought of to be written yet)…Marcion wrote that Jesus started a completely brand new religion that wasn’t even connected to the Old Testament and its always jealous, complaining, repenting, genocidal, wrathful absurd infantile, malevolent, smiting, laws and regulations giving and sacrifices demanding Yahweh-Jehovah-God (aka “God” supposedly). Marcion instead denied Jesus’ actual physical and bodily birth, death, and resurrection altogether by explaining that according to his information and sources (again the oldest sources known up to then btw, and there were many other groups, churches and sects who likewise believed similar things at the time, we don’t really even know what the earliest first believers believed or why), Marcion insisted that Jesus was actually an incarnated phantom from somewhere beyond with an imitation material body, as in he wasn’t even born on earth but instead came down as a phantom and then just took on a bodily form, (a viewpoint also shared by a number of the early Christian groups btw, Marcion was just most singled out by competing so-called “Church Fathers” cults leaders because of his growing presence and popularity), but his writings pissed off some others who didn’t agree and who had their own ideas and agendas, so then they decided to write stuff down also to answer back as a retort which ironically eventually became the early New Testament, so you see Marcion actually started the whole idea of writing the New Testament thing, as in the very first New Testament gospels writings and because of this he’s even sometimes also called the Father of the New Testament. Some of Marcion’s views were similar to the teachings of Cerinthus (50-100 CE) who likewise believed that the lesser “Demiurge” god created the world not the unknown god of Jesus, but he additionally assured that Jesus was not supernaturally born of a virgin, but was instead just a mere man, the biological son of Mary and Joseph, and that the Christ (anointing) descended upon Jesus only at baptism but it abandoned him at the crucifixion and he then simply died, died just as thousands of others were crucified and died. Cerinthus claimed that he received angelic inspiration (“Holy Vision”?) assuring him that was the truth of events (and you can’t deny angelic holy visions sent by god can you? It worked for Paul, and countless others before and after, so Cerinthus could very well have the real “gospel truth”). Interestingly, there are even claims by groups already from those early centuries that Cerinthus was the actual true author of the Gospel of John and Book of Revelation, reason being because even today the Gospel of John in numerous obvious and contradictory ways can rightfully be regarded as the opposite of the other 3 gospels and it largely denigrates them. The John gospel novel can be correctly described even as an “Anti-Synoptic Gnostic Gospel” which adapted Philo’s description of the centuries older pagan philosophical “Logos” concept (first mentioned and written about by Heraclitus in circa. 535-475 BCE), because of the vast differences and because it was written considerably after the other 3 gospels and their sources/anonymous authors it can even more accurately and correctly be described and regarded as a truly Gnostic inspired “Gospel of Satan” or more accurately an “Anti-Synoptic Satanic Gospel”, although Gnosticism teachings and theological ideas are found in the Synoptic Gospels also but just not to the high degree of the later anonymous so-called John gospel texts (To put it colloquially, the authors of Mathew didn’t like what was in the written text of Mark and so added plenty of stuff and various new stories and various new concepts and meanings, then the writers of Luke didn’t like what was written in either of them all that much and so started adding lots more stuff and ideas and changing meanings, but then lastly the authors of John (yes “authors” because it repeatedly states “we”)…basically said “F**k all 3 of you you’re all wrong, I (we) have the real deal gossip rumours news scoops story and know what went down and I’m gonna write the real story” and so then wrote opposite things from all 3 of them and adding more different theological meanings, abstract concepts, new miracles and stories, with his new theologies and ideas he actually comes across sounding more like the “Paul” character than any of the other gospels-novels writers). However importantly not to be confused with the Lucifer/Luciferian “Light-Bringer/Bringer of Light” (because Lucifer is just the ancient Roman Latin name for the planet Venus) or associated with the plural “Elohim” Gods who created the world and everything in it, but rather more in line as the Hebrew Yahweh-Jehovah God’s “Diabolus-slanderer” character (the one that throws libelous claims at another, i.e. – Diabolus which became Devil) who is similar to the Satan Angel (i.e. – “a satan” or “the satan” that did or said such and such) much like the one that blocks and “accuses” Balaam while saving his talking donkey from being beaten to death, who himself even states that he came down to be a Satan to Balaam. However, since we know from Isaiah 45: 7 that the Hebrew Yahweh-Jehovah God is quoted saying “I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, AND I CREATE EVIL” which implies that God is the Devil (more accurately “the Diabolus-slanderer” and not the Elohim or Lucifer of course because the Hebrews never wrote in Latin or Greek) thus God is then denigrating the 3 Synoptic Gospels with the help of his anonymous authors/demons mainly because he is actually the Diabolus/Devil as per his own stated quote in the text and he cannot lie (Now I’m not saying I support Marcion or Marcionism or Cerenthus, Valentinus or Cerdo or any of the many similar earliest Christian teachers, sects and cults leaders or anybody or any belief or desert guru, I’m just saying that as far as we know history tells us that Marcion actually wrote/recorded the very first New Testament books and the very first known gospel from the earliest known sources, well before the later 4 gospels were started to be even thought of and written), and even more surprising probably to many is that Marcion’s gospel is literally the “very 1st Christian gospel ever written or known about…ever”, i.e. – No gospel is ever even mentioned by any of the so-called church fathers before the appearance of Marcion’s “gospel”. As in there wasn’t even any mentions of any gospels whatsoever written by anybody before Marcion did his writing because instead it was just lots of different fables, sources and different ideas and cults floating around, (well they’re all cults actually anyway), we know there were quite a number of different and competing so-called “gospels” in the early years and early 2nd century and each one different from each other in very important ways as well as each one claiming a direct linear connection to the character of Jesus and his inner disciples-clique (there are known to have been almost 100 different “Christian” groups and followers of a new “Jesus character based religion” but with very different teachings and beliefs from one another at that time in the Levant, but each one claiming to be the right and true way…pick a card…any card, talk amongst yourselves about that interesting one and the first official known Christian gospel before the later official 4 gospels inventions quandary).
What was Marcion’s actual ultimate crime? He publicly exposed the OT Yahweh-Jehovah tribal deity for being the malevolent moral monster it claimed to be and he emphasized Jesus too much! He was also hated for disagreeing with their interpretation of certain OT passages as being allegorical, to which Marcion replied was nothing more than a feeble attempt to disguise the primitive barbarities of their scriptures.
But soon afterwards Marcion was persecuted, got outvoted, called a heretic and then excommunicated by the newly appearing and growing Yahwehism-Jehovahism version church fathers politburo who usurped control (which was no surprise really, just as numerous sects already existed for centuries so heretics were all over the place also, and there was no defining what a real heretic was anyway because even the excommunicating cliques were being called heretics by the excommunicated heretics who felt they were right and the true church being persecuted), although there still were many Marcionite churches scattered around that taught his gospel for centuries afterwards before slowly disappearing and finally eliminated by the new consensus thought-police church fathers politburo, so his ideas are not some new Hollywood movie plot or recent New Age tin foil hat conspiracy movement, it was real and the very first Christian gospel and bible version recorded ipso facto. Many scholars even think that Luke was created by just adding anti-Marcionite passages to Marcion’s gospel, or that both Luke and Marcion’s gospel are edited versions of some other lost prior gospel, those who support this last view usually maintain that the Gospel of Marcion is then closer to the original than canonical Luke which was written later including fake Paul information, and we know this because of the remaining evidences of conversations and letters about Marcion that date from the time he lived). Excommunicating, censuring, banishing and condemning each other as heretics all over the place all the time, because they simply couldn’t agree on their versions of stories about the very basic fundamental beliefs “No this goes in, that has to go”…”No, it stays and you go because you are a blasphemy guru”….”No no no, it stays out and both of you are heretics and servants of Satan (who isn’t Lucifer (the ancient Roman name for the planet Venus) or the Devil (diabolus) because Hebrews never spoke or wrote Latin or Greek), but we’ll make some other things up first then have a vote, we will vote and add and take away, invent more and vote more until we have the “Word of God” etc and so on). They were having all kinds of councils, synods, votes, more councils and more banishments and more added fiction for the next council and meetings constantly and they still couldn’t agree, the snowball just kept growing bigger with more snow and even sand and pebbles in it. The most boring and dumb eternal arguments and votes ever. Did he or didn’t he exist and what was his name anyway?, was he a man, a demon or god or god-man or a phantasm? Just what the heck did he say anyway? Hey you there, do you guys or anybody there know what he said or did or if he existed? I think we need a big meeting and let’s have a vote! Hey you brother Copeland and Hinn verily tell us what he said (From the time he was claimed to have lived in the narrative novels and wowing and amazing many thousands with magical feats and even rising zombies afterwards, not even one writer, historian, philosopher, ruler, soldier, politician, rabbi or any person whatsoever made any mention of it, Philo of Alexandria the Hellenistic Jewish philosopher was even in Jerusalem for a while during the time period but seems to not be aware of anything unusual going on or noteworthy, it’s all just only…..crickets. Thankfully later plenty of pagan traditions and stuff was added, picking good important earlier pagan dates and customs for the holidays and celebrations, including ancient pagan Croatian customs such as the holiday trees, wreaths, painted eggs, mistletoe etc).
It’s really ridiculous and extremely problematic all over the place with even just the few examples mentioned here so far. So many “believers” today erroneously and mistakenly believe and have “faith” that the newly introduced Jesus character and themed religion was one continuous movement from only just point A in the early century CE to the 4th century CE , an all-agreeing peaceful continuity with all of them believing the same things in unison, the exact same characters, abstract concepts and magical powers (they all had the faith dagnabit GLO-RY!), a happy-clappy bunch all of the same continuum and a smooth ride of no contradictions or arguments between them at all, a close-knit family of the new presto-magico religion believers and no problems. Real history and material evidences however shows and proves otherwise and that it wasn’t even close to tha scenario. Even though the early centuries lead gurus would censure and destroy many earliest sources containing different opinions, views and beliefs and vilified their missionary work and churches, luckily they didn’t destroy them all and they inadvertently left behind clues and information within their own writings which give a clearer picture and understanding of the religious fixations climate and mutating theologies floating around the Levant, around 100 other gospels, groups, churches, written papyruses texts of movements and authors etc, as a fair ballpark estimate.
In this case of even just Marcion and the Marcionites growing movement, who were especially singled out because of their growing popularity and direct threat to the growing consensus leadership, brings tons of questions that need to be answered, the whos, whys, wheres, hows. For instance the very simple basic starting point question…was the OT and NT god the same thing and deity continuity? or different gods from different ascending and ruling realms? Either they were different and not connected, or it was a multiple personality deity, using the available written sources the latter still even today have a lot of explaining to do, but they’ll usually change the topic and hush it away or get into “don’t worry” jargon abstract mental gymnastics diversions (which is not sufficient and why these questions are still around with many more questions arising and answers being required). People are expected to believe in the character of an erratic contradictory on all fronts tribal deity basically. Like a serial killer or something similar…like a guy who’s captured who had a shack out in the woods where he would take kidnapped victims on weekends, then chain and torture them, burn them, mutilate them and then bury them in the basement, backyard and in the attic. But he used to go back to his family and was the sweetest gosh darn fellow…heck he always did the dishes, his wife and kids loved him as their ideal hero, he mowed the neighbour’s lawn on Tuesdays, he was a Scout leader and coached little league football, he taught the kids on the block neato magic tricks and everything. Then when the television news has the news scoop of his capture and deeds committed and it’s all in the media, his family, friends, neighbours and the scouts they can’t believe it. They think it must be a mistake and obviously mistaken identity…”It’s a conspiracy, that’s not him, there’s no way it’s the same person because that television news story man is a vile monster and evil, not a sweet, caring father and neighbour like we know, he sang in the choir, volunteered to feed the puppies at the dog pound and the homeless geese on holidays for free, he visited the sick kids with toys and would build birdhouses for the blind and deformed, that’s simply not him they made a mistake!”.
Or on the other hand, could it be, as the biblical written material suggests, that the OT Yahwehism-Jehovahism desert tribal deity god, from whom the later Satan character originally came from as a personality trait of him and later as one of his 70 sons of god and personal close friend (which will be examined and better explained and proven later), in fact sent Satan to kill Jesus on Yahweh-Jehovah’s very own direct orders?, so as to muscle out the NT unknown god out of the picture and out of his Earth? And so obviously for this reason he had to speak in parables secretly to confound and confuse the minions of the OT god who were on his trail? Could it be, as biblical scholars and theorists and the very written textual evidences suggest…that the sole reason Jesus would have appeared to the Saul as an alien flash of light from outer space in the first place was to continue his covert secret mission to displace and defeat the OT god? And that it is for these reasons that both Yahweh-Jehovah and Satan are both each described as the god and ruler of earth in the bible which is another irrefutable scriptural textual evidence that both are actually really the same and one identical deity and agendas. (And with the now much better understood OT textual material, could it be that the Genesis account from the very start actually really is Yahweh-Jehovah and Satan covertly working together in unison on the same team (as per the book of Job scenario) simply to thwart the real humans using a deception modus operandi as the biblical textual material strongly suggests? After all, could that OT god really be that dumb to not even know about a talking snake existing in a garden that he allegedly made? (the only thing dumber would be to destroy the world killing everyone and everything because there were some alien-human hybrid people walking around, but then they were still around afterwards anyway so everyone would be killed for nothing), or if as some biblical scholars and theorists suggest, that the serpent actually was Satan only taking the form of a snake, then why let Satan free to continue unharmed suffering no consequences to rule from his realms but strangely instead only punish actual physical snakes who didn’t do anything? Is that also why he later instructed Moses to make a lifesaving bronze rod with a serpent on it as an esoteric clue and affirmation to his earthly minions of this unequivocal undeniable fact? It could very well be literally true then that the entire episode of one of the genesis creation stories is in fact just a much later written esoteric account intended for future Yahwehism-Jehovahism cult followers/minions to believe the concocted explanation as to why snakes live without arms and legs travelling on the ground, and simultaneously to trick them into thinking that a devil-satan actually existed as a separate existing real entity when it was and is the Yahweh-Jehovah deity all along using disguise subterfuge (“creating the evil” – Isaiah 45: 7), i.e. – using the invented preposterous explanation about the existence and origins of snakes as a proof of a separate questions asking diabolus entity, and therefore requiring neverending future blood magic sacrifices which would guarantee further servitude and enslavement of humanoids to itself and his personal representative minions (rabbis, priests, patriarchs, imams, pastors, televangelists etc) towards the future enslavement of the Hyberborean peoples who were already worshipping the real masters of the universe deities as already explained, and the rest of the planet, lest he become more angered and then wrathfully and smitefully let loose the diabolus-devil satan to become a lucifer to send punishments and plagues on them, but it’s still just him all along anyway as clearly shown).
Because as already clearly shown and proven, without disguising himself as a talking snake to trick those humanoids, aka “Adam and Eve”, then the Yahweh-Jehovah deity couldn’t guarantee their enslavement to neverending blood magic sacrifices and so being also eternal slaves to him/it. However as already shown previously and corroborated by biblical scholars and the written text itself, in the very 1st creation story the humans are never even a part of the later genesis garden story narrative, they instead leave the narrative very early on after coming into existence and so they never even become involved in the biblical universe narrative, thus they went on to become the future Hyperborean peoples and were never cursed with eternal blood magic bondage and enslavement to the Yahweh-Jehovah as transpired in the later 2nd “Adam and Eve” creation story. The first created Hyperboreans in the first creation story written source were then simply ipso facto never tricked by any talking snake and so naturally they were never at any time in any bondage to the nefarious Yahweh-Jehovah’s blood magic and genocides and enslavement whims (thus also proving once again that the ancient Hyperboreans were unaffected and experienced no worldwide flood cataclysm which falls in line accurately with all the findings in the archaeological record).
Exodus 15:3 – Yahweh is a man of war. Yahweh is his name.
Was the Old Testament god the same god of the New Testament?…was he really? Are you sure? Is anyone sure or can anyone verify this claim with eyewitness testimony or conjectural rumours? Or perhaps only later over time being transformed and mutated into the same deity by early common era centuries writing and redacting cultists and sectarian fabulist gurus and later still they diabolically enforced that view with state backing after getting rid of or destroying most of the original earliest sources competition? Like I said it doesn’t concern me and I’m not taking any sides here of course, either of Marcion, Cerinthus, Valentinus, Cerdo or any of the many earliest competing and arguing cults and sects gurus because none of them were Hyperboreans (I treat it all more like sleuthing the various characters and plots in a typical mystery novel or Stephen King book). But as an intriguing synopsis of the final important points; Marcion is believed by many scholars, with valid supporting evidences, to be the first author of the very first Christian “gospel”, Marcion preached that the OT vengeful, genocidal, murdering, laws and rules giving, sacrifices demanding, wrathful absurd infantile, malevolent god is incompatible with and not the same god of Christianity, Marcion and his growing movement preached that Jesus was not even physically born on Earth or resurrected but was instead a descending phantasm from beyond who only took on a seemingly human form (so it also lacks a nativity birth narrative just like the Mark gospel novel coincidentally), many evidences point to and are a view supported by many scholars that all 4 later gospels are actually derived from Marcion’s gospel, especially Luke-Acts which appears to be mainly a redacted version of Marcion with added anti-Marcion intent and more fabricated and contradictory Paul and disciples stories again with the focus being mainly anti-Marcion intent (nobody seems to have even written anything anywhere about any Jesus or the Paul character until Marcion, which is very strange). Marcion himself and later Marcionites argued that it was the other cults and sects gurus who were instead adding fabricated events, words and magical events onto the original text and not Marcion deleting any text, Marcion claimed his information came from Hebrew OT text but especially the actual received writings circulating in the earliest and nascent church, Marcion did not include any prophetic apocalypse revelation book material either, Marcion preached the NT god was a new alien never before known god and not related to the Yahweh-Jehovah tribal god of Israel, he claimed the words of the Jesus phantasm and OT Yahweh-Jehovah god were incompatible, for his preaching and missionary work he and the later Marcionites were persecuted for centuries by the later and today so-called “church fathers” thought-police politburo until even into the 10th century with even punishments of death for still present adherents.
Is this proof of something? that jesus is living in the cyberghetto realms and is going to blast the planet with them prophesized holy ghost righteous dance moves to defeat the nations, the beast, false prophet and dragon and then amaze the locusts with headspins at the Euphrates river? (with the added bonus of brand spanking new bowls, lamps and trumpets). Perhaps.
These traveling theologizing-inventing gurus were arriving to councils and meetings with different views and beliefs and abstract concepts from places like Syria, Alexandria (Egypt), Antioch (Turkey), Damascus, Nineveh (Assyria), Armenia, Carthage (Tunisia), Ephesus (Turkey), Chalcedon, Bythinia Asia Minor and many other strange places that have no history of stuffed cabbage rolls or painted easter eggs, each coming to argue their version of beliefs with the others, and even their own versions of bibles with others, who also brought very different versions of bibles/text than others. It was sects, gurus and cults all over the place. But all these places and times have nothing to do with my personal history, Croatians aren’t from those places and times and they had no part to play in all those synods and councils that were constantly against each other and couldn’t agree if there even was a physical Jesus character at all, all they had was stories and more fables. I don’t even speak Syrian, Tunisian or Egyptian anyway, It’s frikin’ ridiculous and so are these televangelist actors who go even more beyond the boundaries of absurdity and fables delirium. Basically the bible is no word of any god whatsoever, but instead it’s the result of many thousands of arguments, meetings, banishments and more councils ad nauseam through centuries…..and even today. Don’t take my word for it, the Lord came down to me in a vision and let me know in my heart, he spoke to me and told me that they’re full of, what we in Croatian refer to as “sranje, glupost i bezveze ludost.” Even today these types can’t agree, there are too many different churches, cults, sects and offshoot organizations to list here. The way things are going these days Jesus will soon be a traveling she-male gay scat porn farmer and part-time fix-it guy from Detroit who’s robe was made of lettuce and wearing a coconut-banana hat, he could rap like Biggie, dance like a drunken dive bar floozy and walk on clouds like Ana Pavlova whenever he felt like it, as well as play the banjo blindfolded standing on his head, GLO-RY!
About 95 percent of the content of Mark’s text appears in Matthew’s text and more than 50 percent of the Mark text is in the Luke text, an undeniable fact and a tell tale evidence of plagiarism. Therefore also evidence of not separate independent authorship as some preachers like to believe and fraudulently claim but it’s instead just a linear mutation of the oldest Mark text (although all 3 synoptic gospels are anonymously written in Greek similar in style to Greek Tragedy dramas and plays and nobody actually even knows who wrote them as the names were applied in the late 2nd century by another anonymous person-editor, they come across more as separately edited versions of a fictional play with different acts-chapters as the author(s) saw fit and that fit best with their already existing ideas, whoever the author’s were). Basically, using other writings as crib sheets/cheat sheets is not authentic independent anything but rather supports the argument that the gospels novels are linear continuation redactions of mythology.
What is the so-called “Gospel Truth” anyway?…Well it depends which gospel novel you read and believe, with so many errors, contradictions, and added and changed information between them then “Gospel Truth” has the same meaning as “Fiery Snow” or more correctly it actually has no meaning, an imaginary suspension of disbelief “Pretend Truth” in the mind that needs no proofs or even common sense. It seems a large part of the conundrum and numerous contradictions in the first 3 synoptic gospels, (Mark, Luke, Matthew, not including the anonymously written John which is the last written novel and a very different thing of its own) are that the “anonymously written” Mark gospel was written first, and the later “anonymously written” Luke and Matthew books just basically plagiarized Mark largely and even verbatim word for word. Around 95 percent of the content of Mark’s text appears in Matthew’s text and more than 50 percent of the Mark text is in the Luke text. However, if wrongly presented as being 3 independent witness sources as many televangelist preachers do, then why would the so-called Luke and Matthew anonymous authors largely plagiarize word for word from a book written by another unknown writer who never met any Jesus character, and never even lived in Palestine or during the time period in question, plagiarizing from a person not even remotely qualified to be writing any sort of witness books in the first place? Good question. But more perplexing and problematic, why the heck start adding a whole bunch of different contradictory information including changing and reversing events, or more interesting to note why would the anonymously written Mark gospel leave such supposedly basic fundamental important information out of his book in the first place? (but he strangely mentions a young man fleeing naked during the arrest of Jesus because that’s more important to know probably than just resurrecting and floating to the cosmos?). For instance Mark starts his story off after Jesus being given a bath by John the locust eater, his Jesus is peculiar and very secretive and even unable to perform miracles at certain times, Mark does not include any information about any miraculous virgin birth or nativity scene or a super genius ‘tween Jesus who disobeys his parents and wows the elders in the temple, and there’s no insinuation or doctrine of any divine pre-existence either (strangely decades later the anonymous John gospel writer does a 180 degree turn and writes almost exclusively about and highlighting the pre-existent theology aspect), “Mark” doesn’t include an amazing walking on water scene or raising a dead Lazarus, in Mark he’s secretive always speaking in parables so much so that even his disciples don’t understand what he’s talking about and the parables were meant only for them anyway and not anyone else (“Mark” also doesn’t go on to explain the secret meanings or the point of many of the parables), in “Mark” his disciples basically come across as bumbling, forgetful and obtuse lackeys most of the time and at the end as fleeing cowards, (eg: after the feeding of the 5,000 with 5 loaves and 2 fish “miracle” story, not long afterwards the disciples are confounded and bewildered about how in the world they were going to feed 4,000 people with 7 loaves and 2 fishes, geez talk about short term memory and being obtuse as if just falling off a pumpkin wagon, they don’t even come across as real people but instead as supporting actors), unlike unlike Matthew and Luke, Mark makes no attempt to amazingly trace Jesus’ ancestry back to King David, Abraham or Adam with a wowee genealogy such as the contradictory genealogies found in Luke and Matthew, in Mark he is simply just “a son of Mary” and Joseph is not even named. Among many other problematic inconsistencies probably the most surprising is the ending of Mark, where the Jesus character basically is quickly sentenced by Pilate because of the Sanhedrin’s consensus and he doesn’t much complain or have any discussions or speeches at any trial, he soon dies fairly quickly after being abandoned, and in the original ending there are absolutely no post-resurrection appearances of any Jesus to anybody at anytime whatsoever and no words or promises spoken either (Waaa? No resurrection? you must be confused of course there was a resurrection that’s supposed to be the most important part of the whole book plot and the entire world history you imbecile, why would he leave out a resurrection and the teleporting and zombies if that’s the most important thing you lying heretic infidel storyteller”…but nope it’s actually not in there according to anonymous “Mark” so it probably wasn’t that important to know, not as important as that running naked guy because that there is some important information that the reader needs to know). How is it then that the later anonymously written “Luke” and “Matthew” novels (and “John” after them) reverse and change endings, events and other things and then add so much more events, information and contradictions after plagiarizing a huge chunk of text material from a guy who’s not even supposed to be in the loop? Good question again. If you were writing a personal eyewitness account about someone or something wouldn’t you write from the very start about the way it was and the way you saw it in your own personal words? Would you even write a biography and quotes used about someone living in a city from 1920 and then just plagiarize 50% to 95% of some other person’s written work who wasn’t even alive at the time or living there or even see or witness anything? (Plus televangelists like to insist that the anonymously written “Mark” text was written around 70 CE, however today and for quite some time we know that is very unlikely and is only the hypothetically earliest date possible after the Roman destruction of the temple during their Siege of Jerusalem, many scholars are actually of the opinion based on studying the text material fragments that “Mark” (the Mark version known today) was probably written circa. 90-120 CE or most probably even later, and all the gospels probably as late as the 3rd century, circa 200 CE, because what they read like before that we don’t know because there’s no sources or fragments). Basically the only thing that can be gleaned from the text of the oldest first anonymously written “Mark” author story with any certainty is that the Jesus character was a man with human parents who was eventually sentenced to death with the Sanhedrin’s urging and then he soon died fairly quickly never being heard or seen again by anyone, with no later added text about walking through walls afterwards or a babbling in tongues party (hint-hint scamvangelists and your infernal verbal diarrhea) or any promised miracles and snake handling superpowers etc. Mark’s story simply ends with some scared women running from a tomb with some guy sitting inside and then saying nothing to anyone about anything and then close the curtains and put on the theatre lights basically, end of the movie folks and please remember to put your litter in the bin on the way out.
The gospels are useless data when it all boils down to historicity, no more true than Old Testament fables novels or any other wild claim recorded in history for which we have no eyewitness source and no objective corroboration of any kind. The Gospels were not written by eyewitnesses. They don’t even claim to be. Yet were written an average lifetime after the events they purport, in a period when we cannot establish any eyewitness was still alive. And we can neither locate nor name any witness they claim to have consulted. In fact, not a single Gospel claims to have consulted any eyewitness whatsoever. Luke just says he used prior Gospels/Novels/Stories. And we know which ones from the plagiarism: Mark and Matthew, yet neither Mark nor Matthew claim to be witnesses either, nor write like witnesses, nor cite any witness as a source for anything they relate. To claim these facts as somehow eyewitness proof or evidence of anything is ridiculous, we don’t even know who wrote them, not a clue, the gospels really are just useless data but mostly fabrications and agendas driven inventions, even primarily aimed many times at other so-called “Christians” living in ancient Canaan/Palestine at the time anyway and not meant for gentiles living in other countries and continents.
All I can say is, if some people feel mad or whatever, I’m just the messenger, the messenger with the truths just commenting on the actual written text and it’s meanings. I’m not the one who’s been making stuff up or talking about contradictory anonymously written scrolls and letters as absolute truth of the universe, adding text and deleting text, changing and inventing meanings and using mental gymnastics to make up more fabulist abstract concepts stuff up for centuries and centuries, and even still today. I’m not the one trying to pass off and get people to believe in ancient Bronze Age and Iron Age Mesopotamian religions evil wandering demon characters, concepts, gods and legends, in Egyptian netherworld tortures and burning lakes of fire, in ancient Canaanite and Ugaritic spirits and concepts, in Zoroastrian fiery doomsdays and resurrections to fiery doom etc. I’m not out there telling you what to believe or not believe and hiding text from you, and I’m not telling anyone to be a new Joshua to slaughter the infidel Gerber baby either. I’m just putting information out for the benefit of the reader, information that is already out there written out and I’m just commenting on it and putting it in perspective in the real world. (also importantly, DO NOT do anything rash or extreme like crucifying or stoning your local weatherperson, doctor, scientist, archaeologist or astronomer etc (including all those infidel chefs and bartenders blatantly spreading them heretical crab, shrimp, lobster and beers recipes transgressions against the law), for blatantly blaspheming the scriptures by proving the earth is round circling the sun and not a flat disc held up on pillars, that the sky is blue not because of a great wall of floating water but because gases and particles in earth’s atmosphere scatter sunlight into refracted light waves, that it snows and rains because of moisture, temperature changes, precipitation and the earth’s axis tilt not because god is tipping the rain jars and opening the snow storage shed doors, that there were people in Europe hunting bisons and cave painting during the LGM Ice Age tens of thousands of years before Adam was made and even before bison were made, that human specimens can’t and don’t live for centuries (especially 969 years like a Methuselah, pfff as if), that snakes don’t have vocal chords, that it’s impossible for the sun and moon to stay still in the sky and the earth to stop rotating for a full day, that diseases are actually germs, bacteria, viruses, cells, parasites and microorganisms and not demon possession or demon’s shenanigans etc, etc, etc). If anything, if you are shocked or even mad you should be mad at yourself, upset as to why you didn’t look into things that directly affect your eternity, supposedly, as the story goes. Mad at yourself for believing things that have no foundation in facts or truth, believing in things, events and in imaginary people that you always thought sounded far fetched and ludicrous, terrible ridiculous stories, but you just went along with the show anyway. I’m not saying I have all the answers about the cosmos and eternity and the meaning of the universe, not even close. I may and probably do know everything about Croatian topics stuff, but not these things, unlike those lying faith seeds television scoundrels who say they do know without a doubt, but they don’t.
Angry as to how you’ve been believing crap and following various guidelines just because you thought it will all be worth it in the end like a prize, and that you’ll be immortal and floating in the clouds happily ever after with wings and wearing a long white robe living eternally as priests of god, which is the great promise. Mad for sitting there listening to people, when you really get down to the crux of the matter, who are telling you that you don’t know how to read or think or use your brain and shouldn’t even attempt to. You should be angry at all the shucksters out there and their carnival sideshow acts, at all their fake miracles and fake made up stories and ridiculous logic and views, you should be mad at them because they are proving my points before I even type one letter, even just the few mentioned and shown here are on a regular basis proving that that they are spreading lies and subversive fake stories, they are regularly proving that their beliefs are b.s. because they’re just constantly acting, inventing things and faking things and don’t even know what a new testament, old testament or bible really is or where it came from or who it was written for or what it all means. Don’t you have to admit that when these types don’t have real irrefutable facts and historical reality or have contradictory vortexes to escape, then that’s why they have to resort to inventing fables, meanings, faking miracles and performing 3rd rate magician tricks to prove their holy positions? Like I said, maybe you would have been better off taking up archaeology, poetry, music and looking for that snake that could talk, boy now that would be amazing and wondrous. I can’t speak for all people, but I’m personally one of those types that doesn’t like being lied to and made to look like an illiterate clueless moron dufus who believes anything from anybody, but that’s just me.
And just what the heck is going on here? I don’t know why but all these biblical genealogist writers and their glorious Gematria numerology calculations sure are amazing, probably the best genealogists ever (even though the Matthew and Luke gospels are vastly different and contradictory and even have different father’s names of Joseph right from the start). Because most people are very lucky to go back even just to medieval times (seriously, thousands of more times amazing than if a Croatian today could accurately trace their lineage right back to one of the early Croats who lived in and around the Carpathians and northern Central Europe in the Early Common Era, or a German, French and English person today accurately tracing back to the Charudes, Franks and the Britones, Cruithni or Picts, back to someone roasting chestnuts and chopping broccoli in medieval Paris, London or Berlin and similar scenarios, heck even going back to a special person walking around and fishing at the Danube river during the Last Glacial Maximum in Pannonia), but instead these guys can supposedly go right back to the very beginnings of the planet and dinosaurs times even before the invention of the wheel or fire. WOW now that’s amazing genealogy information gathering that’s for sure! (actually it’s also just one of the numerous obvious and proven examples of where the anonymous gospel novels writers are simply inventing different things and arguing with each other).
Using various televangelist preacher logic and fabricated alternate universes mental gymnastics I can even make the above 2 images make perfect biblical sense, and so the gospel truth….Back then after the flood and all the dinosaurs and animals were let free, Jesus then promised not to destroy the world by water again but instead next time by fire and other winged multi-headed beasts and creatures and things, so as a sign of his promise he made the very first rainbow appear which can still be seen even to this day…Later after being born and moving to or not moving to Egypt for 3 years, he became a carpenter for about 30 years and started getting bored of making chairs, pig pens and bird houses, Jesus after a heavenly vision from heaven, where he used to live most of the time, predicted color televisions and Game of Thrones DVDs and all were astounded and amazed as per the illustration seen above (for this the pharisees tried to kill him because he predicted and carried the television back home on a Sunday), it is also known as the earliest prophecy depiction of Christmas and Boxing Day. (It was verily a prophecy of future televangelists and miracle faith seeds heal-a-thons harvests where the television verily is the church as well as the rock upon which the television shall sit upon), and today Game of Thrones DVDs are very available at every Walmart and Best Buy just as he promised….Billy and Susan didn’t believe in the bible stories or hocus pocus magics and they didn’t praise the Zoroastrian inspired Yahweh-Jehovah or Allah on Sundays, who are both Jesus’ dad btw, but instead they watched Scooby-Doo cartoons and The Addams Family reruns, that’s why Billy and Susan are now rightfully in the egyptian eternal lake of fire hell lava pools (aka hell these days) along with the heretical Hindus, Buddhists, Natives Peoples and the Jebusites and other tribes, to be forced to listen to gospel rap eternally forever and ever without end eternally. Images: unusualcards.com.
