How “We Unequivocally Know” That Both Of The Contradictory Biblical Nativity Stories Are Anonymously Invented Sectarian Fictions & “Pretend World” Theological Constructs Bullshitism (aka Birth Of Yet Just Another Levant Failed Apocalyptic Blood Magic Death Cult Mythomania Superhero)

The 2 so-called “Nativity Story” versions as presented by the anonymous writers of the later so-called Matthew and Luke gospels novels are very problematic and contain broad irreconcilable contradictions. Each of them include different characters, different events and different sequence of events and geographic locations, different ad hoc made up and contradictory edited “theological” genealogies, different geographic plot starting points and travels, different magical characters, and especially taking place at times years apart from known history including claiming events that should be in recorded history if they happened as claimed…but are not. (They were also written in Greek (a foreign language, quoting from the Septuagint Greek language OT not from the Hebrew bible and in the process using erroneously mistranslated text and meanings and then new theological ideas based on the mistranslations not found in the original Hebrew OT), and written in foreign countries by anonymous learned authors familiar with the Greek classics but strangely unfamiliar with the geography of ancient Palestine/Judea/Galilee, and using already known much older and popular Pagan religions superhero-savior mythemes and tropes. These are just a few of the problematic issues that clearly show we are dealing with a later invented mutating fiction, from a fringe failed apocalyptic blood magic sorcery religious sect (one of quite a few similar but varying in degrees of difference beliefs groups, cults and sects) that was in need of an impressive magical hocus pocus origins story to portray and promote as real history evidence to adherents and the ignorant masses (including of course using made up contradictory esoteric cryptic genealogy gematria magic numbers calculations which was very, very, very important as their proof and probably even their biggest so-called “proof” for their agendas)…and are instead actually extremely contrary to known verified real world history and events, and just like the many older OT texts egregiously contradicting itself repeatedly and also historically inaccurate). And as another particularly interesting fact to consider, they both were written and continually changed, edited and reworked over 100 years after every single real known historical person and the fictitious characters in the plots and magical stories were all already long dead. Image: dorkhorde.blogspot.com.

(Author’s note – The easy to understand blunt from the start title of this post may seem perhaps strange or humorous to some readers at first glance, however it is quite apt and proven to be accurate and topically fitting once the various actual real known facts vis-a-vis numerous fictions and misinformations are brought forth and examined, so for this reason when grouping the various highlighted false informations, contradictions, mythomania and errors etc found from whichever language the textual sources are derived from, I decided to just use the common and easy to understand colloquial term “bullshitism” as a more translation-friendly, more semantically comprehensible and inclusive vocabulary for the benefit of the reader, and because probably lots of people don’t know what a “theological construct” is anyway. If totally unfamiliar with this topic the reader may need to read my first posts “National Security Alert: Foreign Telescamvangelists, Cults, Sects” and “Birth Of The Iron Age Yahwehism Blood Magic Death Cult” for more background information, visuals, behind the scenes less known pertinent details and various definitions that help explain the facts, ideas, circumstances and even geopolitical situations that led to the ancient era of these fiction stories and various primitive theologies. i.e. – to the actual invention of the Abrahamic/biblical fables tribal god in the Levant and ancient Canaan during the Late Bronze/Iron Age as a direct result of many theological and blood magic sorcery mutations, much cultural and religious syncretization and diffusion, primitive ancient superstitions, cosmology and abstract concepts borrowings, influences and adaptions from other surrounding older and neighboring religions such as from the ancient Mesopotamians, Sumerians, Babylonians, Akkadians, Egyptians, Phoenicians, Assyrians, Canaanites, Zoroastrianism until lastly from Greco-Roman influences, religious beliefs, classic literature and philosophies etc).

Well, it’s that season again, that oh so very important season for televangelists and telescamvangelists especially, that very popular holy fundraising season for their temples coffers to bring in as many faith seed shekels as they can, and so of course you’ll come across all of them playing up on the “Nativity Stories” as much as possible (yes plural, it’s not just 1 story as many think), including of course the related choirs and singing about the adventures (believe it or not sometimes even bringing camels in church for the full theatrical effect as proof about something, that camels exist or that camels can appear then disappear and reappear I guess? or that camels are undeniable evidence proof that they were saved on the ark otherwise how could they even be in the church or even exist on the planet in the first place unless they were saved on the ark? that’s scientific proof), the many books and DVDs being sold, I mean various “special offers” being “offered” not sold, lol (oh so many books and DVDs that’s for sure, the “Power of Pretend” can give forth an abundance of mountains of books and DVDs and even miraculously multiply them a hundredfold I verily tell you, Glo-Ry!), probably reenactment plays and tree ornaments too, and of course the shellfish and pork tenderloin/bacon abominations.

Which is why I decided to post this here and tell the real story of what’s going on so to speak. Because even though I already came to the conclusion a long time ago while in my early teens, even before that actually, that the bible, and Abrahamic religions in general, but especially biblical stories material, was mostly fiction, fables, fraudulent mythomanias, later forgeries and basically invented primitive Bronze Age and Iron Age behaviorisms and theologies leftovers, something even completely alien to me (as well as contradictory and failed wrong in many places), but I still didn’t particularly like the fact that I was told to believe them and even have my young mind inundated by their various media scoundrels and television mind control propaganda also (particularly on Sundays when channelsurfing for something real and interesting to watch but instead having my eyeballs, ears, personality-identity and my rightful common sense violated and accosted with religious quackery fabulist’s fake history tricks, self-loathing displays and lying charlatans faith-shekels seeds schemes (just like a television-sectarian excreta virus’ outstretched tentacles trying to feed on my brain and control my mind to do their bidding and enter their pretend world circus-carnival instead of existing in the real world and cosmos), particularly when I came to realize they were lies and people making things up for their own agendas, feeling particularly violated with them attempting to fill my head with all sorts of strange warped pretend world hocus pocus doctrines and contradictory false information ramblings about all sorts of weird and warped things written by anonymous weirdos in some desert somewhere that were just their own invented agendas and pretend world ideas, abstract concepts and imaginations in their own mind, if they even existed in the first place which was very improbable anyway and more often than not impossible and proven so numerous times in numerous ways. Even at that young age I felt absolutely no natural affinity or any kind of connectedness to the various superheroes, characters, events, ideas, traditions, customs, their beliefs, the various blood magic sorcery and magic tricks, smitings-blessings, the weird foreign mega-ethnocentricism themes that was not part of my history or even have anything to do with me or my history whatsoever, or even with the real world, it all seemed very alien to me, like a natural aversion similar to my aversion to eating insects or maggots, and especially the main presented warped and dumb tribal deity skydaddy-genie character (I realized even back then that It was time to stop fooling myself with confirmation bias and denying cognitive dissonance by just pushing to the side and background the many various contradictions, errors, false information, disturbing grotesqueries and anonymously written nonsense and then just pretending it was all instead perfectly divine information and absolutely all true and perfectly this and that or whatever the guru and religion leader was claiming), because instead they seemed strange, not of this world obscure and theological inventions, extremely far-fetched, absurd otherworldly fictional and just primitive foreign deserts Bronze-Iron Age Yahwehism-Jehovahism voodoo filth irrelevant, even most of the cartoons I watched back then seemed more plausible, believable and they even made more sense with an actual point to the story at the end, for example Justice League cartoons; a problem occurs…the heroes have to defeat the villain or villains…drama, mystery, action, suspense…nefarious villain gets defeated..heroes chit-chat at the end being victorious, sometimes a relevant final anecdote or even a humorous final synopsis remark and all is well…stay tuned next week folks! Now that there makes perfect sense and has a point, even He-Man Masters of the Universe, Battle of the Planets and Scooby-Doo similarly made more sense with an actual easily comprehensible plot and actual point at the end of each episode that anybody could easily understand, anybody on the planet would immediately understand what’s going on…they would clearly know who the heroes are, who the villain is and what the villain’s plan is, the various powers and abilities of the heroes and of the villain/villains, where the villain came from, why the villain must be defeated and how the heroes defeat the villain using various means and importantly with no contradictions, heck as just one example you will even know from the start that Zoltar is the villain but he takes his orders from the enigmatic “Luminous One” who’s then actually the ultimate real villain and Zoltar is just his servant minion, even The Smurfs, which was a cartoon I didn’t watch, nevertheless at least also had a straight up easily understandable plot and characters and a point at the end, sure they’re all just fictional cartoon entertainment but at least they made way more logical sense and were way more clearly explained and presented (importantly also the person watching them isn’t being mind control brainwashed into having to believe that every scene, plot and character is 100% real and true or else they could be thrown into the Egyptian Lake of Fire for eternity and the pitchforking and burning worms etc), and on top of that they had credits included also so you know who wrote and made the cartoons instead of them being anonymously made by someone, somewhere at some time (but a talking snake? incestuous garden family? living to be over 900 years old? burning talking bushes that don’t burn they just keep burning but never really actually burn or get burned? wrestling with god and winning? sacrificing burnt blemish-free pigeons, blood magic sorcery and necromancy? (yep necromancy, communicating with dead people/characters, seeing apparitions and visions, receiving hidden knowledge, prophecies or secrets and instances of back from the dead zombieism using incantations/magical words powers is just plain ol’ necromancy…”necromancy is necromancy” no matter which religion or even which puny cult or sect does it or believes it), god-condoned rape of young virgins? talking to and killing a fig tree for nefariously not growing fruit out of season? talking donkey? coin in a fish mouth magic trick? living 3 days in a fish? making deals with demons and then making demon-possessed swine? torturously boring peculiar long-winded speeches? a god battling a multi-headed Leviathan sea monster? six-fingered and six-toed Nephilim giants? all the trees, plants and vegetation growing on earth before any stars, the moon or the sun existed? many fresh newly made zombies risen out of graves walking around the city “seen by many”? ordering killing of infants, children and pregnant women but strictly forbidding shrimp, crab salad, lobster and bacon as abominations? obsessive bloodthirstiness? no cotton-polyester blends garments? threatening and promising cannibalism? stopping the rotation of earth and orbit of the moon? sacrificing a virgin cow and painting dead bird’s blood dots on people to “cure” leprosy? sticks turning into snakes but picking up sticks or mowing the lawn on weekends being a death penalty sentence? Egyptian Lake of Fire? multi-headed human-animal hybrid winged creatures and wheels covered in eyeballs?…..What the heck kind of hocus pocus sorcery and diabolical alternate weirdo world is this anyway? Who conjured up this strange abominable carnival? (will not Lobster Boy, The 4-Legged Woman, The Camel Girl, Elastic Man, The Fee-Jee Mermaid, Jo-Jo the Dog Faced Boy and the Amazing Bearded Lady be there also to be magically healed?), What foul ringmaster from the fiendish calamitous corners of the universe envisioned bringing this transmogrified insane voodoo blood magic circus into town and why? (for the entertainment of the angels perhaps? or for the creepy-crawlies to rejoice and dance about their macabre dance for the stars and moons?). When did this monstrosity story begin exactly or has it always been eternal as a painted clown’s necromantical laugh or a nefarious wizard’s strange bubbling brew? Just what sort of vile brainwashing mind control abominations are at play here? What desert devil or witch evoked forth these and other dross deceits displays and absurdities spells? Where exactly is this strange bizarro-planet anyway? (is it flat or round like ours?), pfff get real I didn’t just fall off the pumpkin truck from Mesopotamia to buy some magical sandals or a basket of magical fruit). Yep, even back then I didn’t appreciate pathological mythomania bullshitism and imaginary hocus pocus being told to me or even coming across it on television by accident, particularly when brainwashing mind control and even more particularly when pathetic displays of faith-shekels seeds begging and fakery tricks is involved. Like I said at my first post, for a very long time and today, in no sense am I follower of Yahwehism-Jehovahism or any of the Abrahamic religions “faiths”, which makes me about as unbiased in my worldview as someone can be, definitely much more so than any of the present-day writers on the Abrahamic faiths topics because they are limited, stuck and controlled in their thinking and reasoning processes.

(Don’t get me wrong though, just because I won’t be at any of those events and being all singing believing or waving my hands in the air for whatever reason etc, or going around buying all the overpriced pointless crap I can get my hands on either, doesn’t mean I’ll be throwing out the whole entire holiday season, that would be ridiculous and dumb (even though I personally have never even been a fan of the holiday since I was a kid, I always hated sitting as a 4 or 5 year old on another fake Santa Clause lap in the mall are some of my earliest memories, I already knew he was fake and I never wore the stupid Santa Clause ring they gave out and never liked listening to any sort of carolling, I liked the tree decorating, the foods, some presents, making snowmen, tobogganing and blinking lights (and getting to taste some sample sips of wine, beer and hooch which was cool and fun), but that was mostly it, even at that time I was already a bigger Hallowe’en fan which was basically the whole month of October and way better cartoons too, oh and New Year’s Eve was ok too of course). After all, I’m Croatian background with a history going back to the ancient Hyperboreans so naturally I’ll definitely be having traditional Croatian holiday foods including some abominational shrimp, crab or shellfish themed recipes, pork tenderloin and bacon (they don’t call it the candy of meats for nothing, plus if I have the pork tenderloin with a cheese sauce it will be doubly an abomination and heretical), stuffed peppers, cabbage rolls and of course beer and/or wine and/or traditional hooch derived adult beverages, because after all it’s all about the Hibernal Solstice/Midwinter festivities customs which goes far back in history, it’s all about celebrating and relaxing during the cold short days and dark Winter Solstice time and the coming New Year season just like in the old days thousands of years ago to even during the Last Glacial Maximum. (you could even say that the snowmen I make today are offspring of the snowmen that they made thousands of years ago). It’s even the original reason for the season everyone knows that, so of course I’m not going to not respect that and my ancestors and their snowmen, that would be disrespectful, offensive and absurd to even imagine, heck it would even make me a loathsome nefarious treacherous traitor spitting on my and their existence).

I’m not going to get into the topics of how and why December 25th was eventually centuries later chosen as the nativity date (Hint; it was already a popular gift-giving, candles lighting, trees and decorations, drinking, snacking and singing etc holiday time celebrated by various pagan religions centered around the Hibernal Solstice, aka Winter Solstice/Midwinter, some of them even already specifically on December 25th), or about the gospels novels scribe’s using cherry picked excerpts of quotes from OT Isaiah, Hosea and other books as a “prediction” as claimed because they’re so obviously taken completely out of context and have absolutely less than nothing to do with anything 800 years and centuries in the future, and the predicted events and results did not happen anyway, and the one’s claimed to be fulfilled were done in the writer’s own day, it’s not difficult to understand, it’s so obvious that all one has to do is just read the passages “in context” and it’s immediately understood that the gospels writers are inventing abstract meanings from a selective tiny partial snippet that aren’t there or even implied to be there…today we call that fraudulent), or about how most of the holiday’s traditions are derived from earlier European pagan religion’s customs and rituals, those are already established facts and known about. I briefly discussed this particular topic among other NT and OT biblical contradictions and wrong information topics at my very first post “National Security Alert: Foreign Telescamvangelists, Cults, Sects“.

And let’s not forget, and it’s something to keep in mind during this very brief examination of this particular nativity story topic…“miraculous virgin births” stories and claims were already very common literary themes and even popular pagan religions tropes for already thousands of years before anonymous so-called Matthew and Luke started writing, fabricating and contradicting (as well as many dying and rising saviours and demigods being already popular also), popular elsewhere first such as the Buddha as one very well-known example, and especially popular already in the area ala Hercules, Perseus, Ion, Asclepius, Dionysus, Helen, Asherah, Sennacherib, Zoroaster, Zalmoxis, Alexander the Great, the Ptolemies, Caesar Augustus, Plato, Romulus, Remus and many others, and they coincidentally often include conceptions by miraculous circumstances and being virgin-born and features such as intervention by a deity, supernatural elements, astronomical signs, escaping, hardships etc (see miraculous births). Actually, the whole “miraculous virgin birth” theme is only just one of the ideas that crept into this one small fringe Jewish religious apocalyptic blood magic sect from various other surrounding older religions in the Levant and Middle East, and which were a direct result of religious syncretism and cultural diffusion not from some all of a sudden new divine holy news scoop by a master of the cosmos to a guy in the desert here and there once in a blue moon (and giving erroneous and contradictory information and occasionally a “vision” in only his mind) as portrayed in the fables narrative (e.g. – baptism; pagan, circumcision; pagan, pork taboo; pagan, resurrection/zombifications; pagan, monotheism; pagan, the apocalypse; pagan, blood magic sorcery; pagan, hellfire/lake of fire; pagan, creation and flood myths origins; pagan, because these are earlier ideas, traditions and customs…from the ancient Sumerians, Babylonians, Mesopotamia, Akkadians, Egyptians, Assyrians, Zoroastrianism, as well as influences from other local Canaanite religions in the neighborhood).

But like I said, let’s see what’s really exactly going on and not going on in these 2 particular presented nativity stories that many people think is just 1 story but isn’t, that many people think they know and only think is real events and telling the same thing but is instead telling different and contradictory stories, as well as the stuff in the stories always left out or not talked about or even questioned by most, many times just because they don’t even know what is written in their very own book/manual (sort of like how we are supposed to believe that dinosaurs and the entire population of humanoids on the entire planet derive from just 3 men about 6,000 years ago, or more precisely all the planet’s nations, peoples and languages (and animals) from just 8 people on a boat about 4,700 years ago, yep nothing questionable or doubtable there so it must have happened just as it’s written by an anonymous someone somewhere without a doubt, to even think about doubting the claims basically equates to diabolical nefarious heretical gentile infidelism)…

You tell’em pastor, the people need them mythomania hocus pocus validations by using your lying fabulist “Pretend Truth” personal cherry picked ad hoc rationalizations and torturous abstract concepts smoke and mirrors gabbing powers, to make them feel all immortal floating zombie special and stuff before lunch (and don’t forget to tell’em about all the zombies, creatures and genderless spacesuit body zombifications too, very important).

…Firstly, so many events, characters and things mentioned by one of these gospels novels is completely missing in the other (of the 4 anonymous gospel novels only 2 of them include a nativity story, the ones today that are so-called “Matthew” and “Luke”, however we don’t really know and nobody has ever known who wrote any of them, all 4 of the writers don’t tell who they are, where they are, exactly when they are writing or even what their sources are). The types of events described in one gospel are impossible to reasonably reconcile with the other, add to that, that all previous mythical gods had biographies written about them pretending they were real historical people (Romulus, Hercules, Osiris, Asclepius, Bacchus, Dionysus, Tammuz, Zalmoxis, Adonis and numerous others), and that many of them had disciples and/or personal followers that were given secret special messages, and even promised eternal life to them after the new superhero resurrected from the dead and floated up to somewhere out there (sound familiar?), then the probability of mythicism in this case becomes even much greater and practically undeniable (also factor in that the first anonymous gospel-novel which eventually had the name “Mark” applied to it by someone somewhere, it doesn’t have any nativity story at all…nothing…Mark includes absolutely no travelling, no magis, no census, no manger, no genealogies, no angels, no visions, no Herod, no amazing UFO-star, no singing trumpeting winged aliens, no massacres of children, none of it, probably because it wasn’t important or he just never knew about it because it wasn’t invented yet? or because the pigeon floating around his head was more impressive and miraculous?).

As just one example…Herodotus in his work “Histories” Book IV (the same book where he coincidentally mentions the ancient Croat Hyperborean tribes of antiquity, but who were also later known as the Veneti as recorded by Tacitus circa 98 CE), he reported about the Zalmoxis based religion which was a belief he encountered among the Getae and Dacians in Thrace around 425 BCE, also attested by Plato and many other writers as a god of the mysteries, living circa 7th century BCE, Zalmoxis was believed to be a former slave, a traveller and then prince who became king and later a religious reformer and teacher of the nation, reappearing alive after being dead and buried for 3 years and eventually becoming a divinity mediating between the earthly world and afterworld, the followers of the resurrected Zalmoxis said he promised eternal life to them that believed in his teachings (which included slavery being forbidden and an abhorrence of slavery, which the biblical Yahweh-Jehovah (and even Jesus), strangely had no issues with and instead actually promoted. so Zalmoxis already is more intelligent than both of them), and that after death they too would be where Zalmoxis was…immortal in “Paradise” eternally…written sources starting from the 3rd century BCE about Romulus the legendary founder and first king of Rome include accounts of him being called “Son of God”, he is born of a virgin into a poor family, hailed as the king, killed by a ruling elite council conspiracy, after his death the land is covered in darkness, his corpse goes missing, witnesses flee afraid after being told “he is risen”, but when he is risen from the dead “at the break of dawn” he then receives a new immortal “bright shining appearance” body, he appears to a friend on the road to the capital city, “ascends” to heaven, then afterwards he is considered an incarnated god…Centuries before Christianity there are accounts and written stories abound about Hercules who’s father was the god Zeus and his “earthly mother” Alcmene, he willingly submits to the 12 labours/punishments, after suffering and dying his body vanishes but he is soon “resurrected” and “ascends” to heaven becoming a living god with a new “divine superior body,” the addition of after-death appearance narratives also accompanies many of these tales similar to Romulus mentioned above, from hero to a god “Resurrecting Hercules” celebrations continued well into the common era until outlawed by the new Byzantine church-state and are even attested by Josephus (Josephus in his Book I of History of the Jews quotes Alexander Polyhistor; “because these men were auxiliaries to Hercules, when he fought against Libya and Antaeus; and that Hercules married Aphra’s daughter, and of her he begat a son, Diodorus; and that Sophon was his son, from whom that barbarous people called Sophacians were denominated.”, and he also cites the 4th century BCE historian Megasthenes who favourably compared Nebuchadnezzar to Hercules). Hercules was eventually also fused with Melqart another of the most ancient of Phoenician resurrected deities (many scholars have shown strong undeniable evidences that the biblical Samson character was largely adapted from Hercules), the earliest ancient inscriptions evidence shows the worship of Heracles was a popular cult already by at least the 6th century BCE…Celsus is quoted by none other than the early (the early new with newly introduced doctrines and theologies) church official censure-fabulist Origen himself in his 3rd century work “Against Celsus” where he mentions that in the 2nd century Celsus reported “a great many Greeks and Barbarians claim they have frequently seen, and still see, no mere phantom, but Asclepius himself” (Contra Celsus 3.24), interestingly though, Asclepius, who was also believed to have raised people from the dead, lived circa. 5th century BCE and his followers soon after his death and resurrection immediately founded Asceplian healing temples and schools (Asclepeion, there are also many “miraculous healing” inscriptions in marble and stone dating from the 4th century BCE testifying to the facts, i.e. – people commemorating and actually leaving behind permanent personal testament inscriptions in marble and stone testifying their thanks for their miraculous healings and cures, not just later anonymous stories and oral fables, with even many instances of entire limbs and missing eyeballs growing back which is something even biblical healing miracles can’t emulate)…

…the portrayed alleged disciples/apostles of Jesus however never even enter the historical record anywhere at any time and they even soon “poof” vanish from the biblical narrative stories entirely, that’s right they just soon disintegrate out of the written narrative altogether being never mentioned again (only much later in the 2nd and 3rd century and later do various new legends appear with various contradictory accounts and hocus pocus), by all accounts according to the written material if they really existed as portrayed and claimed then they instead should have very soon went on to become famous wonder workers and probably even the most famous people in the history of the world, probably even being invited by leaders, kings and even emperors to their royal courts to be taught and amazed about the doomsday apocalypse coming in their lifetime (like a bunch of Peter Popoffs and Morris Cerullos wowing the people across the lands with astonishing gabbing powers and magical astonishing feats). Also considering the alleged Paul character writings take up half of the entire NT (of which 1/2 of the letters are even proven to be later written fraudulent pseudepigrapha anyway which arouses suspicion on all of them by many scholars), then you would think “the 12” disciples would have at least 12 times more letters included in the NT, or at least a significant portion of proven genuine letters from the same early period or at the very least as many letters combined as Paul, but instead it’s just all about “Paul, Paul, Paul”..(Paul believes this..Paul thinks that..Paul hears a voice in his head..Paul sees a light..Paul knows how to read and make up new meanings and abstract cryptic boring theologies concepts to bore people with logical reasoning brains to death..Paul spends 14 years in the desert frying his brains reading OT mythomanias..Paul doesn’t like this or that..Paul is upset about such and such..Paul is special..Jesus changed his mind about lots of stuff and tells only Paul what he really meant..Paul vs. the 12 “false apostles”..(to Paul everyone else is a false apostle though, even people who were Christians long before him while he was instead beating them up and arresting them putting them in prison, because he’s now super-special and “Paul Super-Duper-Apostle” better than the rest)..Paul has the answers and knows the secret eternal mystical blood magic news scoops (just only him though and nobody else on the planet)..Paul and his magical thinking…Paul is going to outer space any day now to get a new genderless spacesuit body..Paul has a mental break from reality then immediately goes to spend 3 years in Arabia..Paul says don’t even bother getting married or having kids because it’s pointless (because you’re new genderless cosmic spacesuit body is already waiting for you and for the new zombies just around the corner)..Paul writes a letter..Paul collects many coins..Paul gets in an Odysseus shipwreck…Paul gets bitten by a snake..Paul hides and escapes in a basket..Paul writes some more letters about new obscure weird mystical cryptic abstract concepts theologies to country bumpkins..Paul and his guaranteed personal doomsday apocalypse and floating genderless immortal zombies in the clouds in new spacesuit bodies happening in his lifetime “guaranteed by his skylord”), but all the while the supposedly “personally handpicked” disciples immediately instead became invisible or just ghosts I guess, because they instead just dissolved into obscurity overnight never leaving any material evidences of their existence, no miraculous miracles powers as promised, and not even entering the real world historical record anywhere at anytime.

(Of course only much later and for centuries including even up to medieval times (and even later still actually), is when various new invented fables emerge and magic powers hocus pocus legends and new “it is saids” and “traditions” suddenly appear and start to be invented, written and popularized (as is usually the case when writing fictions and about fictional people so no surprise there at all, rule #1; when in a new cult or sect it’s important to make up amazing incredible genesis characters and astounding events). That’s when new out of the blue “traditions” suddenly appear, new traditions started that are founded on other unfounded fables and anonymous stories or just brand spanking new invented…”It is said that such and such”…It is said that this and that”…”It is said that…”…a new piece of bone fragment is purportedly and anonymously suddenly found here, a piece of elbow bone found there, a piece of ankle bone over here, a finger bone or bony hand is “found” and another elbow bone is found way over there somewhere by somebody…”It is said that…” (not sure where or by whom but it was purportedly found somewhere and tradition says it can even do various hocus pocus sometimes too, “it is said to belong to [enter name here] and defeated many demons, itchy feet and migraines’), even skull heads appear (even the skull of the same guy being found and located at different places at the same time wow, he was multi-headed?)…”Tradition says this…It is said that…Tradition says that and such and such”, no shortage of new traditions and anonymously found suddenly appearing pieces of bones and fingers that’s for sure (if only actual undeniable proven hard historical facts and undeniable evidences could be found and appear the same way the suspicious bone pieces and dubious magical stories and legends traditions appear). Especially during and particularly after the time of Eusebius (the dubious 4th century controversial exegete who spent his time censuring, fabricating, editing, interpolating, inventor of martyr lists and brand new unheard of before legends for the new religion, more about him later), there was suddenly a new “Martyr Supply and Demand” because as new churches were being built they required “relics” to attach to them so as to wow the local unknowing peasants and give an aura of magical power and especially mainly strengthen their “faith” and “obedience”, entire bodies and skeletons were impossible as proof of course except in very recent cases of someone locally known, so just a new dubious unknown finger, femur, toe or hand found somewhere was good enough to pull it off, “behold this bone of someone people, let me tell you a story about this one, it is said there was once this guy…”, not long afterwards fake relics become big business and even part of power politics…”I need a piece of bone I tell you, I hereby command you to go find me a piece of bone, I need a really, really great piece of bone or finger or head from someone”. Heck suddenly new dubious and anonymously found pieces of wood were all the rage, and then rusty nails suddenly “appear” at opportune times along with a new tradition and “It is saids” again, pieces of thorn bushes, spurious pieces of old cloth suddenly “appear” and are “discovered” also and “It is said”, then even more astounding miraculous claims and traditions and “It is saids” appear…a piece of Noah’s axe or boat, a purported lock of someone’s hair (probably belonging to a disciple or one of the Marys, Johns, Simons or Marks etc, surely it must be how could it not be?), wine from a Cana wedding, a blood stained hanky, even a feather from archangel Gabriel’s wing and much, much more (even these days some people claim to have found a piece of wood in Turkey that was a giant boat and various finger and elbow bones in the deserts). After all, you can’t argue with another newly appeared tradition story and a dubious purportedly found piece of anonymous bone, a hanky or piece of tree from somewhere can you? “It is said” after all and you have to admit that’s pretty undeniable proof and evidence probably).

If there’s one thing that is unequivocally proven, that is without a doubt an absolute fact and known to be 100% factually true, it’s that stories are never in a shortage. There is a human tendency by many people, especially televangelists and scamvangelist preachers, to respond to many of the contradictions and difficulties by just make-believing that no difficulty exists or by greatly downplaying the contradictory error/information that doesn’t fall in line with their reasoning, ideas, agenda or theology to the point of it practically not existing, but it is still written so it does exist (Cognitive Dissonance). The quickest, and laziest, (and most deceitful) way to overcome the problems is to then just pretend that there is no problem…”Oh heck there are no problems everything is perfectly fine, there are zero problems or contradictions what’s for lunch? ham and peas?”. That’s the mighty magics and “power of pretend” and will get the faith shekels seeds into the tax-free temples coffers and expense accounts easier. The “Power of Pretend” is actually quite powerful and amazing when you think about it, anybody can pretend just about anything in their mind, and not even need any proof of anything either (“Pretend Truth” and “Pretend News” was around a lot longer before “Fake News”, it’s basically the same thing). Even little kids know how to play pretend and can even have conversations with invisible made up people and yes even with floating space beings and talking animals better than most adults.

Much like most of the previous magical OT characters and hocus pocus events and historical real world inaccuracies, events described by both the “Matthew” and “Luke” novels writers likewise cannot be reconciled with history outside the New Testament. Both authors disagree and list events that, had they actually happened, could not have escaped public record, and this is particularly evident in their Jesus character dealings which begin from the start with competing contradictory nativity stories.

Before even getting into the fundamental meat of the matter and contradictions of the story, the presented genealogies of the Jesus character are completely different. In the Matthew gospel novel, the scribe writes that Jacob is the father of Joseph, but in Luke he writes that Heli is the father of Joseph. There are also problems in the used 1 Chronicles “lifted” quote by “Matthew” which would imply that his Jesus is a descendent of David through Solomon (oh you know, the king Solomon who had 700 wives and 300 concubines for holy on the side fun supposedly, I think that’s why Pat Robertson named his show “The 700 Club” probably), but the “Luke” writer in his genealogy actually uses his brother Nathan instead, that’s another person entirely and so is a completely different lineage and is just another problem to add to the long list. Also, the lists from David to Joseph are completely different, the absurd genealogies even has the Luke novel laughably go back to Adam (Adam? yep Adam, “Matthew’s” genealogy to Abraham is not good or impressive enough it seems to wow the reader, so “Luke” instead goes all the way back to talking snakes in a garden and duped clueless masters of the garden universe times, so we’re off to a really great accurate historical account start to the story, really great history writing. Besides, if the Joseph character is presented as “NOT” being Jesus’ actual real physical father, then both genealogies are really just futile attempts to link “their Jesus” to anybody on earth anywhere and so it’s pointless anyway, (talk about overcompensating), seriously, the fake genealogies writing authors are shooting themselves in the foot, if Hercules…I mean Asclepius…I mean Perseus…I mean the Jesus character is supposed to be descended from the lineage (from the “seed”) of a David, then how exactly is this possible if Joseph or anybody else on earth are “NOT” his real father giving any “seed”? He’s descended from nobody on earth it says so right in the narrative story and it’s plain to read, there is absolutely no “seed” involved in the birth, so the fake Joseph genealogies are pointless fabrications, absurd and just theological smoke and mirrors rubbish concoctions! The fake cherry picked predictions attempts are only “theological magic numbers” genealogies and they fail big time on multiple levels).

Actually both genealogies are mainly just directly “lifted” (aka plagiarized) from the OT anyway, a straight copy and paste, then just tweaked-edited as each writer wanted symbolic magical numbers of generations in their equations, using of course gematria as the rules (3 sets of 14 in Matthew and both using factors of 7 which is the main important thing for accuracy, everyone knows that). Matthew has twenty-seven generations from David to Joseph, whereas Luke has forty-two, with almost no overlap between the names on the two lists. This is because in reality, the gospels-novels writers had no great desire to fulfill any historical accuracy; just like the OT scribes-authors before them they had an agenda and only symbological requirements and magic numbers calculations for their devised “theological truth claims” (aka “Pretend Truth”), to hell with reality and real facts more or less (also interesting is that the anonymous Matthew gospel novel writer decided to omit and leave out a number of named generations and kings from his “lifted” OT text specifically so he could claim 3 sets of 14 generations equaling 42, however even still his last set is actually only 13 generations so just yet another problem on top of the contradictory “Luke” genealogy problems). Humans genetics, real world history, anthropology, palaeontology etc are not factors in the scam faked genealogies either…obviously. The “Luke” writer also failed to remind in his amazing super-duper wowee genealogy that the entire population of humanoids on the entire planet as told according to his believed version of history-reality, derive from just 3 men and not just only his failed magic man superhero, which would technically mean Jesus was likewise a product of incest (that’s the only conclusion from the written sources and implied information so these gosh darn dang awesome genealogists don’t have much foresight, hindsight or even common sense about these things, because where else are any further humanoids supposed to come from? the magical stork delivered them? a magical pigeon just suddenly made them appear? perhaps). See also “Virgin Birth: It’s Pagan Guys. Get Over It” and “Dying and Rising Gods: It’s Pagan Guys, Get Over It” for more general information.

Strangely also, as is usually the case with the mythomania of all the gospels novels writers though, so actually not strange, they go full steam ahead from the very start just telling their stories, like reading an owner’s manual to a crockpot or Ikea furniture assembly directions, and in this case their nativity story. i.e. – They don’t identify or say who they are at any time or where specifically they are writing, (and not even writing in a language connected to the area where the “plots” and “adventures” take place), or what and who their sources are (since they weren’t even alive or in the area at the time, who the hell are you anyway mr. scribe? all hiding anonymously behind pages and ink and being all contradictory and stuff), they don’t state why the reader should believe them and their sources or why they are good and trustworthy sources, the scribe author doesn’t have any personal thoughts or opinions about anything he writes and claims or why they believe their sources are true (e.g. – …”Hi I’m Todd, I was skeptical at first because it sounded just too incredible and astonishing to believe, but I was told by Billy who knew Ivan who heard it from Monique and Inga who worked at the inn and who’s cousins Hugo, Karl and Sven were shepherds that night so I know it happened exactly like this, and I did a bunch of painstakingly detailed historiography research and fact-checking which further factually proved it without a doubt, my cousin Pierre even knows a guy who has a piece of straw from the manger etc), nope none of that, which are very general basic methods that actual historians and biographers used at the time, and today especially. Instead it’s just anonymously rushing right out of the starting blocks going full throttle with their magical story narrative, hocus pocus and even reading minds knowing what people are thinking in the stories and knowing long and private secret speeches said by people and floating outer space beings, as if there’s absolutely nothing peculiar or fantastic taking place or strange unreal things happening to question or doubt or be surprised at, no personal author’s remarks about something seeming too amazing and impressive or even surprising…everything incredible is reported as just ordinary while more importantly to them they’re building the story “symbolically” and “cryptically”. And there’s no mention of any alternative accounts of the same event when we (as well as the plagiarizing gospel novel author) know they exist and even used some of them, such as the so-called “Mark” cherry picked cut and paste job example, instead they’ll just change the story on a personal whim without mentioning that they are or why they did it. These are just some of the big flashing neon warning signs and obvious markers that we are clearly dealing with a fiction story…more precisely an invented theological fable written after the destruction of the Jerusalem Temple in the late 1st century to fabricate-legitimize an apocalyptic religious sect’s origins and existence and main superhero character introduction, and importantly their connection to OT quoted text excerpts they used (even though they’re cherry picked out of context and not connected in any way whatsoever anyway, as you’ll see). Btw, the original 1st anonymous “Mark” gospel novel writer starts off his superhero Jesus character introduction by only having a pigeon landing on him when he’s about 30 and then given a bath by the camel furs wearing John the locust eater, there’s no nonsensical famous magical traveling adventures and floating singing aliens or a lost ufo, magis, Herod, magical dreams and angels or even any shepherds anywhere.

And just what the heck is going on here? I don’t know why but all these biblical genealogist writers and their glorious Gematria numerology calculations sure are amazing, probably the best genealogists ever (even though the Matthew and Luke gospels are vastly different and contradictory and even have different father’s names of Joseph right from the start). Because most people are very lucky to go back even just to medieval times (seriously, thousands of more times amazing than if a Croatian today could accurately trace their lineage right back to one of the early Croats who lived in and around the Carpathians and northern Central Europe in the Early Common Era, or a German, French and English person today accurately tracing back to the Charudes, Franks and the Britones, Cruithni or Picts, back to someone roasting chestnuts and chopping broccoli in medieval Paris, London or Berlin and similar scenarios, heck even going back to a special person walking around and fishing at the Danube river during the Last Glacial Maximum in Pannonia), but instead these guys can supposedly go right back to the very beginnings of the planet and dinosaurs times even before the invention of the wheel or fire. WOW now that’s amazing genealogy information gathering that’s for sure! (actually it’s also just one of the numerous obvious and proven examples of where the anonymous gospel novels writers of Matthew and Luke are simply inventing different things and arguing with each other).

The 2 nativity stories contain many internal contradictions, they conflict with each other, and also external contradictions when they conflict with known proven verified facts of history. The anonymous scribes-authors of so-called Matthew and Luke without a doubt never imagined that their two books would ever be placed next to each other in a single collection of books (along with the anonymously written so-called Mark and John versions novels). Each author was writing only for their own particular agendas and audiences where they lived (“Luke” even plainly states at the beginning of his gospel novel that he’s writing just only a personal letter to some guy named “Theophilus”, who’s probably just a fellow sectarian cult member…so obviously he must be writing to the entire world and planet then I guess, a great amazing declaration to the world just like telescamvangelists claim), and each of them believed they were writing the one and only true “THE” gospel novel about their Jesus character. We know this because of the mutating, added, reversed endings, omitted and changed information from the original anonymous Mark author, as well as their internal conflicts and correcting of the other previous gospel novel theologies and events which are basically their arguments with each other, that’s right, plain to read in the texts they are arguing with each other, they are not a linear succession of supplementing information, they are actually instead a mutating line of anonymous authors somewhere trying to overthrow and depose the other previous written version, each one is attempting to become “the” one and “the” only official story by adding, omitting, changing information and theologies (the included “John” novel writer is the last one written and a thing of its own way out there in left field, with a new Pentecostal Terminator-Jesus already preexistent immortal who’s totally self-assured about everything and claiming to be a deity, with a new on the scene zombie Lazarus character, having at least a 3 year mission adventure instead of 1 year like the rest and a bunch of other new and changed stuff, characters and ideas not found in the other 3 gospel-novels). As for this particular topic some further points to take into consideration…

Contradictions, Fabrications, Interpolations, Impossibilities, Fraudulent Claims, No Evidences & Believing Your Own Lies Does Not A Truth Make.

If someone wants to tell you, and someone else the next day, when and how their friend was born but gives each of you different dates at least 10 years apart and under very different and non-existent circumstances and including different events and people involved (and then throws in some floating singing aliens in the sky, a lost ufo, an absurdly pointless but also very important famous census travel to Vienna that didn’t exist and even a genealogy to Hercules and even all the way to Zeus), then he probably had a few too many glasses of subpar hooch.

…The anonymous author of Matthew claims that Jesus was born during the reign of King Herod. Luke claims Jesus was born while Cyrenius (aka Quirinius) was governor of Syria. However, Herod died 10 years before Cyrenius became governor. Either Matthew or Luke is wrong on this issue, or they are both wrong. Only one thing is certain: the Bible contains an error and contradictory information regarding the year when their Jesus was born. This is usually a big red flag showing that what we are dealing with is fiction, and it’s just one of numerous red flags to appear even just during these 2 nativity stories alone.

The “Massacre of the Innocents” is not recorded in history anywhere.

The anonymous author of Matthew in his mythomania claims that Herod killed all boys near Bethlehem who were 2 years old or under. No other gospel makes this claim. More importantly there is absolutely no evidence outside the Bible of any atrocity like this ever taking place. Historians recorded many things about Herod who was the Roman client king of Judea. We know he was born around 74 BCE, that he died in 4 BCE, and that he completed many building projects, including construction of the port at Caesarea Maritima and greatly expanded and renovated the 2nd Temple in Jerusalem with Roman aid (destroyed in 70 CE by the Romans). It is recorded in sources that he improved water sources, built water supplies and aqueducts, built roads, built Masada and Herodium and ensured peace and order (again with Roman help and military aid), he leased copper mines, killed his wife and two sons, and did many other things. The so-called “massacre of the innocents” however is missing entirely from any historical record, a very common theme one will realize regarding the OT and NT in general.

Also, the text in “Matthew” implies that it took the travelling magi about 2 years to make the trip or that the birth already took place about 2 years previously when the star first appeared, which both means about 2 years either way, because the text reads that “after” he was born is when the star first appeared. Later in the story Herod after realizing that the magi duped him and weren’t returning to report to him, only then he decides to order the massacres…”in accordance with the time he had learned from the Magi”…and from earlier text…”Then Herod called the Magi secretly and found out from them the exact time the star had appeared”, because why else order up to 2 year old boys to be killed if it was born just days ago, or even a few weeks ago, and because when they follow the “reappearing” star again it leads them to and stops and hovers right over the house, they arrive at “the house” and come across the “child” not an infant in a barn manger (And besides, why even arrive to Jerusalem and then even right to the very throne of Herod in the first place? if they were following the supposed star, which is even the absolute worst place they could have arrived at (why the heck would Herod who is a King of Judea and a Roman client king with armies and great power and authority…let a few travelling foreign unknown astrologer nobodies even approach his palace or property with royal guards security, or why would he even care to waste any time on what they have to say?, he had nothing more important to do than let foreign astrologer strangers tell their astrology tales?), and why not instead perhaps come across something or ask someone else before?, something like…oh I don’t know…maybe…perhaps…possibly…SHEPHERDS!, surely there must have been some shepherds (or other people) out and about doing stuff across the land that could have pointed them on the right track? or why not just another measly angels appearance or dream to set them straight with proper directions?). Even just this farcical story excerpt sounds completely made up and is an incredibly badly planned out adventure by the ufo-star anyway.

King Herod: “Really? travelling magi priest astrologers from the east somewhere? You don’t say? and the guiding ufo star brought you here instead? right to my personal palace and royal counsel and military meetings with my generals and building projects architects and just sauntering right past my armed security battalion and troops? It’s your lucky day though, the Roman senate representative just left and so I have 15 free minutes before some salesmen from Anatolia arrive to show me some magic sandals and a new amazing disappearing coin trick. Well, you’re already so darn close already astrologer magi guys, you just go down that road and then turn left at the fig tree and then it’s only about an hour walk and you’ll hit Bethlehem in a jiffy, you can’t miss it it’s just past that hill over there, btw the local inn there has some darn tootin’ fine tasty goat boiled in milk it’s the absolute best around, I highly recommend”.

As another interesting point, Herod was already around 70 years old at the time, are we to seriously believe that he, or any other powerful Roman client king or ruler with armies under their command, would have felt the slightest bit threatened by some baby being born? or perhaps even stranger still be especially alarmed or even care about some travelling “anonymous” and “unknown” foreign “a dime a dozen” astrologers-priests stories and start worrying about what they think? Because he all of a sudden started panicking that he might lose his kingship when he’s over 90 years old? hehehe pfff as if (Astrologers were a popular “thing” back then and found all over the place, you couldn’t go anywhere without bumping into astrologers and failed predictors and doomsday gurus (and demon-possessed people were a thing too supposedly, practically everywhere you went), and these supposed guys weren’t even Jewish or even native to the country, they were nobody foreign magi astrologers (On top of all that, written sources record that Herod had a number of family members executed because of suspicions they were trying to poison him, he was also still in conflict with and had problems with the Persian’s Parthian empire in the east at the time, even very concerned with Persian spies attempting to assassinate him, oh but now some strange anonymous peculiar guys with a dubious fancy ufo-star story enter his city and even his palace from the Parthian-Persian east and Herod is all “Oh hey there suspicious guys, come on in how can I help you? Do you need some directions to find the new king? Oh sure no problem, happy trails travelling wiseguys enjoy your darn tootin’ swell vacation and hail to the new king!”, talk about ridiculous)…Did the magi point out the lost guiding ufo star to him? the one that got them lost and they couldn’t see and follow and so ended up at the wrong location in the first place? Even reading just this introduction narrative through the eyes of reality and common sense makes it all seem more like a lousy kitsch comedy act (featuring Benny Hill as Herod). Nice try but it all seems very made up and absurd).

The absurd and senseless census in Luke is not recorded in history anywhere.

There is a historical census recorded during the time of Cyrenius. However, that census and no other Roman census ever required anyone to return to their ancestral homes from where they lived 1,000 years ago. There are major difficulties in accepting Luke’s account: his gospel links the birth of Jesus to the reign of Herod the Great, but the census took place in 6 CE, nine years after Herod’s death in 4 BCE, and it was only local in Judea for tax purposes anyway, not an empire wide pointless mass movement of peoples over vast distances.

Chapter 2 of the Luke gospel novel correlates the date of the nativity to the census. – Luke 2:1-5:

“In those days a decree went out from Emperor Augustus that all the world should be registered. This was the first registration and was taken while Quirinius was governor of Syria. All went to their own towns to be registered. Joseph also went from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to the city of David called Bethlehem, because he was descended from the house and family of David. He went to be registered with Mary, to whom he was engaged and who was expecting a child”.

Again, no such ridiculous census as described in Luke shown above ever took place, the excerpt regarding Emperor Augustus declaring that “the entire Roman world”, i.e. – the entire Roman Empire, required all the people living in the empire to travel back to their ancestor’s city, would have even been one of if not “the” most major pointless absurd time and money wasting and serving absolutely no purpose snafus of any ruler in the history of the planet…ever (think about it, everybody stopping working in the cities and towns and villages in the entire empire, everyone working in the fields, farming, fishing, making textiles, working on roads and buildings, manufacturing…everything, suddenly stopping and “Well, it’s time to start packing now we got a long census trip to get ready for”, lol that’s so pointless and totally bonkers!). On top of that, the Romans did not directly tax client kingdoms such as under king Herod, and no Roman census ever required millions of people to travel from their own homes to those of distant ancestors from 1,000 years previously. Even in his own history, Augustus himself fails to mention this incredible “miraculous” census achievement but does mention his many other achievements and that’s simply not even remotely credible.

To add even more absurdity into the narrative equation as well as some good ol’ reality…according to the Matthew’s genealogy he lists 27 generations from David to Jesus, and Luke has a whopping 42 generations from David to Jesus. But even if we take just the much lesser Matthew example and then do the math, then that’s 2 to the power of 27 (2^27) which comes out to 134,217,728…that’s over 134 million people!, even using just 1 parent for Joseph (who wasn’t his real father anyway) it still comes out to 67.1 million (“Luke’s” genealogy scenario is even much, much, way much worse and totally mind-boggling at almost 4.4 trillion descendants, and 1% of those descendants coming out to (drum roll…) over 43 billion!, and that’s only just puny insignificant Bethlehem!). Even using an average generation lifespan and only 1% of all descendants being alive at the time period, then it still comes out to there having to be more descendants of David in Bethlehem at the time than there were inn rooms in the entire Middle East, even more inn rooms than in the entire Roman Empire! No wonder there were was no room at the inn! For all the travelling census guests Bethlehem would have needed around 1.342 million inn rooms! (these days back here in the actual “real world” instead of “pretend world” there are roughly around 100,000 hotel rooms in all of Tokyo, then also factor in other towns and cities in the empire and the bonkers ludicrousness multiplies exponentially).

The anonymous Matthew gospel novel writer of course knows nothing about it and mentions no amazing miraculous pointless census, this would be because according to the anonymous Matthew writer they were instead already living in their hometown Bethlehem, so of course there was no need for a fictional census travel adventure from a hometown Nazareth as the so-called Luke writer describes. That’s right! as in already living in Bethlehem from the start! What’s more, we can logically deduct from known sources that the actual real local Cyrenius census was only in Judea and would have been given about 9 years after the supposed birth of a Jesus anyway (unless he was born twice through teleportation and time travel or that king Herod time travel teleported also and then teleported back to die), what we see is just invented theological propaganda at play. Let’s see what other contradictions and very strange problematic presented information there is…

Just like in the OT, if you have the begets then you have the proofs basically, the begets are the unquestionable proofs ipso facto, and if the begets this and begets that go all the way to the first humanoid well then that’s the begets proof right there ipso facto, don’t you have to admit only a fool would think otherwise or ask skeptical or inquiring questions if all the begets are already plainly written right there? Don’t ask pointless inquiring skeptical questions people.

Luke has no Trip to Egypt (and living for years in Egypt), Matthew has no trip to Jerusalem. The problematic irreconcilable dichotomy is present throughout both gospels-novels nativity stories.

This is a big one that gets brushed aside usually by telescamvangelists and fabulist charlatans, so they just pretend the problem doesn’t exist, and that solves that, (you see? the “Power of Pretend” is awesome because you can pretend things do or even pretend things don’t exist whenever you want then, if something exists you just pretend it doesn’t exist, if something doesn’t exist you just pretend it does exist with no proof or evidences needed, it’s biblical and simply awesome and miraculous! Glo-Ry!…I’m waving my hands in the air looking at the ceiling…not really hehehe). In Matthew, Jesus is born in his home town of Bethlehem, they then flee immediately to Egypt after a warning dream to Joseph, and after their return from Egypt “a few years later” (yes “years later”, probably at least 2 years later), they then travel directly to Nazareth to avoid the son of Herod. And remember, in Luke they’re originally from Nazareth.

In Luke, Mary and Joseph start in their home town Nazareth, then travel to Bethlehem for a famous census (that neither “Matthew” or anyone else have never heard about), then they go to Jerusalem, and then return to their home town of Nazareth.

Many scamvangelists and apologists try to create a “super story” in which they combine the travel of the two nativity stories above into one journey, usually selective cherry picking excerpts or a phrase here and there, ad hoc rationalizations, mental gymnastics (a wave of the hand and presto magico) and imagining a real super gospel in their mind using the mentioned “Power of Pretend” methodology, but this is is impossible, and plainly fraudulent again. The Luke writer specifically mentions circumcision on the eighth day and the required purification time. This refers to Leviticus 12, which states when a boy is born the mother is unclean for 7 days, the foreskin is removed on the 8th day, and she must not touch holy objects for 33 days (if Jesus were a girl, Mary would be unclean for 14 days and could not touch holy objects for 66 days). Luke 39 notes that when this 33 day period was complete they returned to Galilee. A trip to Egypt is not mentioned at all by the Luke writer!…instead they went to the Jerusalem temple soon after the birth and then just back to Nazareth (Dang you Matthew novel writer and your Egypt travelling shenanigans!).

Can also be extended and applied to the entire planet and cosmos in the present, the past and even to the future, aka “Pretend World”.

Annunciations, Lost UFOs, Magi, Angels, Shepherds & Shenanigans Oh My!

An annunciation is given to Joseph in “Matthew”, but in “Luke” this is given to Mary. Each identifies the child as the promised Messiah (whatever that means and to whom exactly and for what reasons, “Luke” states that he will be given the throne of David and reign over Jacob’s descendants forever, pfff yeah so… what does that mean to me? Is this supposed to mean something to me? Is it supposed to mean something to me today…to some person living in Japan?…or in the pre-discovery New World?…the indigenous peoples, Mayans, the Cherokee, in Siberia? people living in the Alps? along the Danube river?…in ancient Pannonia, Illyricum, Dalmatia, Germania, Baltics, Gaul, among the ancient Vistula Veneti, Heruli, Helvetii, the ancient Greeks and Romans, the Bronze Age Corded Ware and Hallstatt culture populations, the Goths, Celts, Vandals, Varangians, Liburnians, Etruscans, Thracians, Sarmatians, in ancient India, China, Somalia, Sudan, around the Caspian sea, in New Zealand, Polynesia, Hawaii? etc and so on, this so-called Jacob character is nobody to me and actually means absolutely less than nothing to me and to about 99.99% of the planet because they all had their own kings and leaders…and besides…king David? oh the guy who sleeps with his trusted soldier Uriah’s wife behind his back and gets her pregnant and then slyly and nefariously planned his death on the battlefield to look like an accident just to trickily hide the deed, and he also even already had a bunch of wives and fun on the side concubines anyway, oh what a great holy respectable guy that David Glo-Ry!), according to the Luke writer we have shepherds come to Bethlehem for the nativity scene, this after being told from some glorious singing floating angels in the night sky, but the Matthew writer knows nothing about this. Matthew instead has 3 “Magi” from the east following a guiding star (not kings as wrongly presented sometimes (what kings? of what kingdoms? kings don’t go around travelling on spur of the moment dangerous unknown travel adventures with other kings anyway, that sounds made up), but more correctly representing astrologer magicians and priests of Zoroastrianism or Mithraism, it’s the origins of the modern-day words “magic/magician”, which btw according to the OT laws was deserving a sentence of being stoned to death on the spot which is yet another contradiction problem you can add to the list), following a guiding star that zips around appearing and disappearing and then reappearing and hovering, Matthew knows nothing about any shepherds and angels.

Firstly, nobody can “follow” a star anyway, stars move throughout the night as the earth rotates. The star you see in the east at night will soon be in the west, following a star would be futile and just be walking in circles, stars in our galaxy are all orbiting in a nearly circular path around the center of the galaxy, and so stars especially can’t direct anyone to any specific place. However the guiding star claimed by the anonymous Matthew author in his novel text (anonymous Luke who wrote after Matthew and even borrowed from him knows nothing about it and instead writes his own adventure), it eventually stops and floats above the very house where the new family is living, which is impossible, specifically for the travelling magi from the east (“Hey Magi, it’s over here! This is the place!”), but only after it lost its way and the whole Herod-Jerusalem snafu thing, see also suspension of disbelief (Above is a representation of the purported event, not an actual photo).

However, the guiding star that the magi follow didn’t have Google maps or even a compass, so instead of directly leading them to Bethlehem it leads them to Jerusalem and even to the very palace and throne of the king Herod (in the process ultimately directly causing many thousands of deaths of innocent children…facepalm). In Matthew 2 the presence of the magi in the court of Herod the Great even disturbs the entire temple city of Jerusalem. The royal court, the assembled chief priests and teachers and even the whole city is upset by this the Matthew text reads! Knowing the gossip network we should expect the whole kingdom to be turned upside down by this news.

All the rosy-cheeked jolly merry kids over the years singing all those Christmas carols (and especially that annoying mind control “pa rum pum pum pum-…rum pum pum pum” brainwashing filth mantra song) never really sing much about the Matthew 2:16 “Massacre of the Innocents” episode of the story, because it is an important part of the story remember and the whole reason for the hiding in Egypt for years thing (no, no, no, because whatever you do don’t do that, don’t include that part in the lyrics whatever you do don’t do that, basically the kids are being brainwashed to condone infanticide as being irrelevant or even necessary for the main plot of their superhero and so that it’s actually a good divine cosmic lucky thing or something which is reminiscent of the Israelite-Joshua genocides and infanticides in the OT and just plain creepy), and it happened all just because the guiding star gave extremely awful directions to the magi, but don’t fret they’re just NPC babies characters not that important to the game…I mean to the story, but they do give more bonus points and extra powers to the main player though. And besides, it makes the birth that much more full of gosh dang darn diddly darn dang ding dong doodly darned glorious suspense and exciting drama and all that. Image: thebricktestament.com.

After the chit-chat session Herod soon points them on the right track to where Bethlehem is (thanks for nothing guiding star), and then not long afterwards proceeds to plan to kill all boys 2 years old and under in the area to make sure he rubs out any potential new king competition based on what the Magi told him (Later in the fable the ufo star stops and floats directly over the place, but if the “guiding star” would have just taken them to Bethlehem in the first place instead of to Herod’s Jerusalem, then all the “Massacre of the Innocents” would never have even happened, or at least given an angel warning like Joseph gets to tell them to turn left at the fork in the road instead of right, even the entire Egypt escape adventure would then have been totally unnecessary. Absurdly they actually even did get a dream warning later anyway…”And having been warned in a dream not to return to Herod, they withdrew to their country by another route”. What is going on here? Why not warn them to not go to Jerusalem in the first place, and so avoiding all those babies deaths? Dang you lost guiding star! next time use a dang darn compass I tell you!!!). In a way after reading the story and chain of events, it should be called not the “Star of Bethlehem” but instead more precisely the “Star of Herod” or just “Star of Jerusalem”, because frankly that’s where it actually led the magi astrologers if anywhere.

I should also note btw, that according to Jehovah’s Witness’ official doctrines they believe that the star was instead sent by the “satan” character because they claim their god simply wouldn’t allow and couldn’t be behind the lost star/magis/massacres snafu thing (I don’t know if this mental gymnastics theologizing also applies to the many OT god ordered killings, Joshua’s genocidal military campaigns and infanticides ordered by the god, the claimed worldwide flood adventure which kills almost everybody on the entire planet, the many times the biblical god smites and kills Israelites as well as their enemies back and forth etc), which just goes to show you how how these ancient superstitions and primitive beliefs, ideas and claims just keep mutating and mutating and with different things added and edited out and changed and then mutating some more within the mutation…according to however the cult or sect or guru sees fit to include in their particular alternate universe mind control theologies (more about them and about how the so-called “satan” character is really just an imported concept from Zoroastrianism and other Iron Age Levant religions that is NOT found anywhere in the earliest OT biblical text, and how the biblical satan character is actually really just the same biblical local tribal god character just under a different name, how at first he originated as a personality trait of his, and then only later still transformed (mutated) into a proper noun as a specific personal heavenly errand boy/lackey (aka gofer, before mutating again and “given” a kingdom and realms and his own personal army of angels and even power and authority over the entire earth to rule (instead of being just simply defeated already and out of the picture and problem solved because that would make too much sense or be nonsensical Glo-Ry!), and then later still even miraculously turned into a garden snake who teleports backwards in time and completely duped his maker who had no clue etc), which is even admitted and proven by the biblical text and narrative itself, that can be read at my first post here).

Well that sure is weird, an angel appears to warn Joseph not to go to Nazareth, but didn’t warn the Magi not to go to Herod’s Jerusalem and in the process avoid the whole pesky “Massacre of the Innocents” thing (Well actually they did get warned later not to go to Jerusalem but it was already too late by then they already informed Herod so the damage was done, great going pointless dumb angels), they may be great singers and trumpeters floating around in fancy robes and stuff but what is it with these lazy dumb angels being all forgetful and absurd not using some common sense foresight?, or do they just work for and take orders from a dumbass boss? (you sure as heck don’t want people like that working at NASA or a nuclear power plant or even lighting up the gas BBQ that’s for sure). Next time “Less torturously boring singing and praising and floating…more foresight and common sense” angels.

*(Author’s note – I’m not implying I’m all-knowing or perfect and all omni this and omni that knowing everything everywhere before it even happens…and even before that, but If I was the god character in this story I would have warned the magi to not to go to Jerusalem and visit Herod and instead just direct them straight to Bethlehem (as in…”Pssst, Hey Magi guys down there, take that road on the left and don’t visit Herod, if you do he’ll get all in a ruffle and start slaughtering babies to nix any kingly competition which will make me look bad and unknowing, trust me I know what I’m talking about, oh and be sure to bring along some nifty fancy gifts while you’re at it, gold would be a good idea…happy trails magis!”), that way no innocent babies get killed for nothing and I would come across as a swell all-knowing super-duper smart great guy god and all that instead of a clueless unknowing jerk deity with no prediction foresight powers. But that’s just me and the way I personally roll, just saying).

About 95 percent of the content of Mark’s text appears in Matthew’s text and more than 50 percent of the Mark text is in the Luke text, an undeniable fact and a tell tale evidence of plagiarism. Therefore also evidence of not separate independent authorship as some preachers like to believe and fraudulently claim but it’s instead just a linear mutation of the oldest Mark text (although all 3 synoptic gospels are anonymously written in Greek similar in style to Greek Tragedy dramas and plays and nobody actually even knows who wrote them as the names were applied in the late 2nd century by another anonymous person-editor, they come across more as separately edited versions of a fictional play with different acts-chapters as the author(s) saw fit and that fit best with their already existing ideas, whoever the author’s were). Basically, using other writings as crib sheets/cheat sheets is not authentic independent anything but rather supports the argument that the gospels novels are linear continuation redactions of mythology.
Well, (rubbing and twirling beard thinking)…I think I’m gonna write an accurate detailed eyewitness account of what Jesus said and did the way I saw it, so I think I’ll just plagiarize and copy from this other guy who never even met him, it makes sense to me (the plagiarizing is even worse when you factor in that around 95% of the “Mark” text is in “Matthew” and over 50% in the later “Luke” novel).

Which brings us to the major problem which gives birth to numerous other problems and contradictions, including the 2 nativity stories conundrum discussed so far, that being that the so-called Matthew and Luke gospels novels are mainly separate written works, anonymous Greek written works, which largely plagiarize from the oldest first anonymous gospel novel called Mark, and then add and change information, characters and events to suit their purpose and for their particular audience.

What is the so-called “Gospel Truth” anyway then?…Well it depends which gospel novel you read and believe, with so many errors, contradictions, and added and changed information between them then “Gospel Truth” has the same meaning as “Fiery Snow” or more correctly it actually has no meaning, that’s right, after reading this post you will realize that the term “Gospel Truth” is just pointless meaningless semantics chicanery (as well as an oxymoron), it’s really only just “Pretend Truth” in a person’s mind and imagination. Almost 95 percent of the content of Mark’s text appears in Matthew’s text and more than 50 percent of the Mark text is in the Luke text. However, if wrongly presented as being 3 independent witness sources as many televangelist preachers do, then why would the so-called Luke and Matthew anonymous authors largely plagiarize word for word from a book written by another unknown writer who never met any Jesus character, and never even lived in Palestine or during the time period in question, plagiarizing from a person who was not an eyewitness and not even remotely qualified to be writing any sort of witness books in the first place? Good question.

See what I mean? What is this Yahwehism-Jehovahism blood magic broadcast from the ski chalet foolishness? there’s no skiing in the bible, Mahershalalhashbaz never prophesied unto to ski hills of the Midianites, Moabites, Edomites or Canaanites or of their snack counter pork meatballs and bacon abominations and bubbly beer spritzer heresies. Based on the real known facts of the many irreconcilable differences and contradictions between the gospels novels, then it’s actually completely the opposite and only “Pretend Truth” chicanery as explained above (“Gospel Truth” also being an oxymoron just like “Bullshit Truth”), it’s just an imaginary suspension of disbelief “Pretend Truth” in their mind that needs no proofs or even common sense, and so people who use the term as a claimed actual meaning to propagate their agendas and propaganda ideas are just blatant swindling frauds and dishonest fabulist fabricating liars (and that’s the modus operandi charlatans commonly like to use, to spread their primitive Bronze/Iron Age blood magic death cults theocracy beliefs and ancient primitive superstitions into a one-worlder commie-utopianist marxist inspired identity and personality/reality destroying filth garbage cults theologies into people’s minds, it’s just theological mind control propaganda especially when faith shekels seeds and temples coffers are at stake). Sure it’s a nifty television studio with a nice fireplace, freshly waxed floors, comfy furniture, remote peaceful nature and forest window scenery (which doesn’t even make any sense and is actually a scandalous heretical blasphemy because instead of slyly using non-holy land gentile locations scenery in Colorado it should instead rightfully be window scenery of Jerusalem or Galilee or a giant pigeon in the desert as a proper biblically correct backdrop to his biblical gospelling Yahwehism-Jehovahism bullshitism (when is Colorado or the Rocky Mountains ever mentioned in the bible or by Abraham or Jesus or Ezekiel etc even once? There are various mountains and rivers named…Tigris, Euphrates, Nile, Jordan, Gihon, Habor, Dead Sea, Sea of Galilee, Red Sea, Lake of Fire etc but name me one verse in the entire bible that mentions the Colorado River or Rocky Mountains even once), also in a 2019 interview Wommack claimed that in March 2001, that he necromantically resurrected his own son after being dead for five hours (as well as that he knows 30-40 people who did the same necromancy magic trick, strangely though he believes that cancer is “no big deal” to complain about because it’s god’s plan and he even criticized Christians as arrogant who ask for healing from cancer…”If your kids die tough luck, but I get to zombify resurrect my kids”), so then why didn’t he try to resurrect the prophets Billy Graham, Oral Roberts, Paul and Jan Crouch or Tammy Faye Bakker then? or even why disobey his god’s wishes and blatantly against his will raise someone from the dead that his god personally took and so in effect selfishly stealing his son from his very own god? and why even wait 8 years to tell people about the miraculous zombification and have no doctor’s and official’s statements, no documents, no records or any evidences or verifications or even mention it anyway? and if so why not just open an office or resurrection department at a hospital to raise other non-cancer zombies? that smells of 100% lying scumbag bullshitism too which it is), intro music, fancy markers and bookmarks and company logo coffee cup and some dang darn tootin’ fine nifty swell shirts and loafers, but that doesn’t fool me or even mean anything, he’s even got that famous pigeon in the logo but that’s just slinging the same ol’ hash that even Benny Hinn uses, pigeons are a thing with these types (Heck, I’m even willing to wager 25 shekels, a 3 year old red heifer without defects or blemishes, 2 pigeons, a goat not boiled in its own mother’s milk, 10 virgin concubines, a bushel of unleavened bread and a bowl of oil that he sends Christmas cards to Joyce Meyer, Pat Robertson and Kenneth Copeland probably, is this the sort of people you want teaching your kids actual real world history lessons? Exactly). And besides, what the heck does he think he’s doing anyway? (and similar fabulists). Everyone knows how to read, even 5 year olds know how to put letters together to make sounds, put them together to form words to make sentences to make meanings, even a half baked moron knows how to read. What real people want to know is who really wrote it, when was it really written? in what language? how many versions are there and what are the actual sources it came from? where? why? for whom was it actually written for? etc. Real people don’t want just personal ad hoc rationalizations, cherry picked mental acrobatics, absurd fables and sleepy nauseating long-winded ramblings and primitive abstract concepts theologies pretending as personal invented gabbing ideas as being real world history and reality. Are we to believe that the viewers don’t know how to read like a 5 year old then? That’s just plain disturbing, I had no idea there were so many adults out there in tv land that still needed their bedtime stories and fables read to them by lying shekels-charlatan strangers, it’s even shocking, just go take some English class reading lessons somewhere they’re usually absolutely free, heck you’ll be able to put letters together to make sounds and then words, sentences and meanings in no time.
#gospeltruth #gospeltruth #gospeltruth #gospeltruth
Gathering the glorious mythomania temple shekels of the nations with cherry picked fabricated magical thinking fables and contradictions since 1947, one of the most popular fabulist apostle-witches of the 20th century.
Just some of today’s unscrupulous deceitful “Yahweh-Jehovah Liar’s Shekels-Club” wannabe prophets and apostolic-witches spreading their personal pretend world magical thinking, preaching-gabbing about a fictitious invented mythological Jesus character instead of Paul’s original 1st authored apocalyptic doomsday yom kippur spacegoat celestial Jesus skylord character. “If there are tax-free temple shekels bullshitism faith seeds buckets to be filled, the people will come and the temple coffers shall overflow in abundance and blessings of fabulism, fraudsterism and fake miracles chicanery”. – Yahweh-Jehovah aka “The Lord”, “The One and Only Big Kahuna of Jerusalem”, “The Best Flood-Maker West of Mesopotamia”, “The Awesomest Genocide-Maker in the Milky Way”, “The Lyrical Master of All Demons and Their Demon’s Demons”, “The Best Hocus Pocus Maker Since The Ice Age”, and “The Blood Magic King of Zion” etc. (Strangely these various elite apostles-witches in their delusional pretend world magical thinking also believe Jesus was God..but also even the new real Adam…but also God..however he was also actually Adam..he was God and Adam..and supposedly clearly Adam and God..???..but where’s Eve then? and will she be Yahweh’s wife or will she get yet another Adam who’s just “only” an Adam? (just an Adam, not an Adam who’s a son of god and god and an Adam who’s also god etc), or will she be the wife of the Jesus Adam?, who’s actually the real Adam, who’s actually Yahweh, but will the Virgin Mary be upset then that her son who is God is also Adam which would mean she actually gave birth to Adam and not to the son of god who’s actually god who’s actually the new Adam. Also, Jesus’ god is Yahweh anyway, not the Elohim (plural gods) who actually made the first Adam in the genesis fable book, which would have to mean the plural Elohim is Jesus who’s also Adam now and who also created Jesus who is actually Yahweh which is then actually him creating himself, i.e- the Elohim who created Yahweh who created Jesus who is the Adam who is the Elohim that created Yahweh that created Jesus as the Adam etc, also will there be another talking snake and magical fruit also? But the Garden of Eden and talking snake was in ancient Mesopotamia anyway (modern day Iraq), which meant he was Iraqi and not even Jewish, which would mean god is Iraqi, which would mean Jesus is also. And besides, was God the first Adam too? and was it Yahweh or the plural Elohim? (or was it the Elohim who created Yahweh), and if the biblical God (either Elohim or Yahweh) had killed Jesus as he planned from the start then that’s the same as when the first Adam died and so both Adams died and were actually not immortal, and that would mean Yahweh was actually 2 Adams then? (well he made one of the Adams anyway but is just taking credit for 2 Adams when he shows up way later to Abe the travelling sorcerer guru in Mesopotamia), or actually why not even be the first correct Adam in the first place and then not even have to make another Adam and then kill yourself later anyway? Killing your own Adam which you made and is actually you seems like making a lot more pointless complicated work for yourself needlessly for no reason which is inefficient, that seems to make much more sense. But why not make the 2nd Adam be born to Abraham’s wife, or Moses’ wife or heck even Noah’s wife? that would have even been the ideal perfect time…after the flood and then presto!…a brand spanking new world and so a brand spanking new Adam too, problems solved. Also, why didn’t the biblical God (either the plural Elohim or Yahweh), or Jesus or even either of the Adams who were God supposedly…why didn’t any of them or maybe even all of them tell us from the start about this secret magical abstract multiverse? or at least not even make the talking snake who caused all these multiple Adams in the first place? What about the older Zoroastrian Adam? and the even oldest version Epic of Gilgamesh Adam? from which the later biblical Adam originates from so he’s the first original Adam, will there be a final Battle of Adams? sort of like a Battle Royal and the last Adam standing is the victorious real Adam? How many Adams does it take to screw in a lightbulb? (Also, what if Darkseid or Thanos attempt to install their own Adam? or if the prophesied reptilian-aliens from the outer rim beam down to their underground hidden base in Antarctica as predicted by someone somewhere and then send forth their armies of multi-headed mutants on scorpion-tailed laser beam-breath horses and chariots commanded by their own Adam to attack Jerusalem, Babylon and the pyramids and then take over the world?). And that’s without even getting into the second Eve scenario which complicates things even much more, as in will she be the mother of yet future Adams also just like the first Eve was? Will there also be a second Noah then also and all those similar types? This pretend world magical thinking and weird mystical magical abstract cryptic theological construct ideas of these dubious apostles-witches and their mindless mind controlled minions is really boring, dumb, absurdly pointless, esoteric jimble jamble and just sounds made up and so deserving absolutely no faith shekels seeds.
And you’ll also notice, which is very strange as well as heretical and blasphemous against Jesus and his tribal Yahweh-Jehovah god and their older superheroes, that all the televangelist and scamvangelist and their fellow loyal minions types never ever at any time wear the authentic real “Ugly Christmas Sweaters” around the holidays, but why not? Instead it’s usually the heathen heretical pagan European Hibernal Solstice themed symbologies and characters ugly sweaters (such as those heathen rabbits, elves, ducks and deers, bears, diabolical sleigh riders, snowmen and nefarious trees and snow flakes instead of rightfully having camels, scrolls, possessed lepers, lamps and bible characters, I’ve even seen some have abominational lobsters and pigs on them, heck as far as I know there’s not even any frikin snowmen in the Levant and deserts anyway for Cripe’s Pete’s sake!). That sure is weird…but then again as ugly and ridiculously nauseating as these real Ugly Christmas Sweaters are, I actually would like the telescamvangelists and their believers types to wear them, because that would be hilarious and a segue for so many awesome jokes, jokes guaranteed to liven up any boring dull office party or dinner table without a doubt.

But more perplexing and problematic, why the heck start adding a whole bunch of different contradictory information including changing and reversing events, or more interesting to note why would the anonymously written Mark gospel leave such supposedly basic fundamental important information out of his book in the first place? (but he strangely mentions a young man fleeing naked during the arrest of Jesus because that’s more important to know probably than just resurrecting and floating to the cosmos like a balloon?).

In a nutshell…

Anonymous Mark gospel novel author: “I’m the gospel truth”…

Anonymous Matthew gospel novel author: “No, I’m the gospel truth! plus I have a genealogy to Abraham, exciting magi shenanigans, a trip to Egypt, baby massacres, an appearing, disappearing and reappearing ufo-star, visions and dreams shenanigans, coin in a fish mouth magic trick and even lotsa zombies walking in the city seen by many”…

Anonymous Luke gospel novel author: “No no! you’re both wrong I’m the secret news scoops gospel truth! plus I have a genealogy to Adam and the talking snake, a great big census plot, an exciting adventure trip to Bethlehem, floating glowing singing aliens and amazed shepherds”…

Anonymous John gospel novel author: “No no no!, To hell with you guys, all 3 of you are wrong and way, way off, I’ve got the real secret news scoops gospel truth I tell you! plus a new hocus pocus zombie Lazarus character, a water into wine magic trick just like Dionysus, a 3 year mission not a measly 1 year like you amateur bubs, and a whole lotta new mystical esoteric cryptic theological Gnosticism abstract conceptualizations galore, and even multiple endings…Woo-Hoo!”.

For instance Mark starts his story off after Jesus being given a bath by the camels fur wearing John the locust eater (and honey he supposedly scraped from tree bark crevices, being an obsessed deranged holy man prophet is awesome), his Jesus is peculiar and very secretive and even unable to perform miracles at certain times, Mark does not include any information about any miraculous virgin birth or nativity scene or a super genius ‘tween Jesus who disobeys his parents and wows the elders in the temple by reading, and there’s no insinuation or doctrine of any divine pre-existence either (strangely decades later the anonymous John gospel writer does a 180 degree turn and writes almost exclusively about and highlighting the pre-existent theology aspect), “Mark” doesn’t include an amazing walking on water scene or raising a dead Lazarus, in Mark he’s secretive always speaking in parables so much so that even his own disciples don’t understand what he’s talking about and the parables were meant only for them anyway and not anyone else (“Mark” also doesn’t go on to explain the secret meanings or the point of many of the parables), in “Mark” his disciples basically come across as bumbling, forgetful and obtuse lackeys most of the time and at the end of the story as fleeing cowards (and soon disappearing from even the NT historical record completely, just vanished poof). (e.g. – after the feeding of the 5,000 with 5 loaves and 2 fish “miracle” story, then just a few days later the disciples are confounded and bewildered about how in the world they were going to feed 4,000 people with 7 loaves and 2 fishes, they’re greatly perturbed and not sure what to do about the predicament…but it’s basically the exact same bloody situation!, geez talk about short term memory and being obtuse as if just falling off a pumpkin wagon, they don’t even come across as real people but instead as clueless fake supporting actors behaving more like 12 stooges), unlike Matthew and Luke, Mark makes no attempt to amazingly trace Jesus’ ancestry back to King David, Abraham or Adam with a wowee genealogy such as the contradictory genealogies found in Luke and Matthew, in Mark he is simply just “a son of Mary” and Joseph is not even named, he’s just a man who gets hocus pocus powers only after the pigeon thing.

“Master Rabbi, we got another great big but hungry crowd again and only 7 loaves and 2 fish this time, how the heck are we gonna feed them all this time?”
Far from being an isolated instance, all throughout all 4 gospels novels (and the acts chapters), the disciples characters repeatedly and continuously are portrayed as bumbling mistakes prone fools, and not even as actual real people but instead more like just fictional characters in a supporting role. During a whole year (or 3 years in the so-called John novel) they remain as incompetent, confused and not understanding what’s being said or done at the end as they are at the beginning of their adventures (sort of like never talking to their guru, asking questions, having informational conversions and explanation talks etc, they just only follow around in the background somewhere as uninformed as the people they come across, even other people in the novels act strange not like real people or equally as fools…in the 4 greatly contradictory empty tomb finale scenes the women already know there’s a huge stone in front of the entrance, but they decide to walk there anyway knowing they’re not strong enough to move it themselves and then only on the way they ask themselves “who will move the stone?”, geez talk about not much common sense foresight with these people. The answer though is plainly evident…the anonymous novel writer knew he was going to write in the stone as already moved and even include glowing aliens etc, so there was no need for the women characters to bring along more people to move the stone or to ask common sense questions at the beginning). Many scholars and historians, including the biblical scholar and former pastor Robert M. Price in one of the videos below explains it very plainly because it’s plain to see, they are intentionally written up as confused not understanding bumbling fumbling supporting character fools (sort of like soccer and football players as an example), because they always have to be wrong so that the Jesus character (who portrays a guru coach) can always be right and have to explain and correct them constantly…for the benefit of the reader, they are essentially literary devices made intentionally dumb so as to make the main character-superhero seem amazing. Dense bumbling lackeys and followers were even already a time-honored popular literary device motif used for many centuries, seen in the works of Homer and the OT repeatedly and being well known. Even analogous to the Israelites following Moses in the desert for 40 years in the Exodus fable…not understanding, unbelieving, forgetful, uncommitted, even being constantly punished and murderously smited for their bonehead actions, for their regular mistakes, for not following orders and for even just their grumbling and complainings, they just never get it. And yep, he was the rabbi leader of the very small apocalyptic mind control doomsday sect, a very by the book strict ethnocentric Jewish Rabbi character totally obsessed with apocalyptarian and Moses-based blood magic sorcery theologies.

Among many other problematic inconsistencies probably the most surprising is the ending of Mark, where the Jesus character basically is quickly sentenced by Pilate because of the Sanhedrin’s consensus and he doesn’t much complain or have any discussions or speeches at any trial, he soon dies fairly quickly after being abandoned, and in the original ending there are absolutely no post-resurrection appearances of any Jesus to anybody at anytime whatsoever and no words or promises spoken either (Waaa? No resurrection? you must be confused of course there was a resurrection that’s supposed to be the most important part of the whole book plot and the entire world history you imbecile, why would he leave out a resurrection and the teleporting and zombies if that’s the most important thing you lying heretic infidel storyteller”…but nope it’s actually not in there according to anonymous “Mark” so it probably wasn’t that important to know, not as important as that running naked guy because that there is some important information that the reader needs to know). How is it then that the later anonymously written “Luke” and “Matthew” novels (and “John” after them, the John scribe-author for his theological mind control propaganda even changes their 1 year missions into a 3 year mission and adding a new risen Lazarus zombie character and other things) reverse and change endings, events and other things and then add so much more events, information and contradictions after plagiarizing a huge chunk of text material from a guy writing in Greek who was NOT an eyewitness and who’s not even supposed to be in the loop? Good question again.

What does this even mean? (I’m gonna buy my ornaments and pointless bric a brac at garage sales or the dollar store thank you very much). It’s really strange how all these fabulist charlatans with their shekels faith seeds schemes are really just disseminating mainly primitive Bronze/Iron Age Mesopotamian, Egyptian, Zoroastrian and various Canaanite pagan religions abstract concepts, behaviorisms, ancient superstitions and deserts blood magic sorcery theologies of an invented tribal warrior deity, and all the while standing in front of heathen infidel European pagan Hibernal Solstice trees and decorations and probably even eating shellfish and pork abominations snacks and foods, see previous posts here and here for more about that.
The god’s rapture-food infomercial shekels prophet apostle-witch and savior of America Jim Bakker, is wowing many with apocalyptic rapture-food for an already 1,900 year old failed nonexistent rapture (and since payment for the buckets is called a “gift” or “donation” there’s no income tax for prophet Jimbo which amazed many and many were amazed Glo-Ry! #elationface).
Many people are not aware that during all the multi-headed and bodied winged anthropomorphic creatures, and rivers of flowing blood, and beasts and dragons out of the sea, and strange beings, winepresses of blood, lamps and trumpets and falling stars to earth, horses with lion heads breathing fire, smoke, sulfur and with tails of biting snakes, smoke from the abyss and scorpions (and the Euphrates river drying up also of course) and avoiding all the swords, the prophet Jimbo Bakker’s freeze-dried soups and meals buckets will ensure your tummy is full for the lord and new immortal zombie spacesuit body.
What does this even mean exactly? 241 servings? Staying Alive?, I have never in my entire life ever seen people singing and so excited and joyously clapping over 30-year shelf life pancakes, pinto beans and potato flakes? (I would actually like to see that at the grocery store for a more glorious rapture-food shopping experience, maybe around the frozen foods or vegetables section, I want more singing and clapping when I’m buying my carrots, breads and frozen perogies dammit!), but the Bee Gees were disco-demons anyway everyone knows that, this is all very problematic, absurd and contradictory….♫♪♪♬…Gimme ♪ that ol’ ♬ time religion ♫ ♩♩♫
Just in case the reader may not believe me about the above statement, here’s unequivocal proof that the demonic satin-jacketed Bee Gees song is filled with satanic lyrics, one can clearly hear nefarious lyrics such as “Hey man I’m a Satan…I am one and you’re one….Haaaaiiiiiiilllll…ha ha ha ha ha I’m gonna get you!” (while even outrageously pointing towards Venus-Lucifer to summon forth the multi-headed Leviathan-Dragon from the abyss to smite the nations)…among other even worse disturbing demonic phrases I can’t mention here because of their graphic abominable evilness which would shock the internet world probably. It’s quite obvious and even a fool could see that Jim Bakker and his apostles-witches gang are in diabolical league with the Beezlebub Gees and that’s a fact people. (and combined with the already proven and known about dark underworld demonic lyrics hidden in many Abba songs from the time also (coincidentally at the exact same time that prophet-witch Jimbo was gaining popularity with his televised kabbalist shekels faith seeds witchery), then their tentacles of diabolical deceit are evidence of various infernal things, I might do a post about the topic down the road).
And remember it’s just like god’s infomercial rapture-food prophet and apostle-witch Jimbo says, when you’re out there trying to avoid getting killed “by sword” and things riding “chariots” for some reason (watch out for those swords and chariots people!), remember you have to dig a latrine first with the foldable shovel that can fit in your backpack, and only then you can enjoy the yummy rapture-food, it’s biblical or something people! #LATRINE.
Pssst! God’s Infomercial prophet apostle-witch Jimbo! Newsflash…the stories you’re making up were supposed to have happened over 1,900 years ago 100% guaranteed and the Paul character has already been there and done that and failed miserably (don’t you even read your own book?), a total snafu disaster, so you’re flogging a 1,900 year old dead horse and just really embarrassing yourself now…and others…hehehe (although I heard the Creamy Potato Soup Bucket is supposed to be good for cleaning bathroom grime, stove top degreasing, as a glue and hair conditioner also which is a plus and practically miraculous). Besides how typical with these types of pointless humanoids, with all their dear precious brothers and sisters and children starving and having various diseases in the world but they’re much more concerned about living to be 120 years old in their bunker cave so as to be chosen to float up to the clouds in their new genderless immortal zombie spacesuit bodies to rule the world from Jerusalem. (But I guess you sure don’t gosh dang darn diddly darn dang ding dong doodly darned want to meet a floating space alien in the clouds in your brand new immortal genderless zombie spacesuit body on an empty stomach. Mmmmm apocalyptic rapture-food there’s nothin’ better…creamy potato soup bucket and freeze-dried 30 day fiesta bucket enchiladas, yum!). Hey you lady enjoying the rapture-food!, did you dig your latrine first?!

If you were writing a personal eyewitness account about someone or something wouldn’t you write from the very start about the way it was and the way you saw it in your own personal words? Would you even write a biography and quotes used about someone living in a city from 1920 and then just plagiarize 50% to 95% of some other person’s written work who wasn’t even alive at the time or living there or even see or witness anything? (Plus televangelists like to insist that the anonymously written “Mark” text was written around 70 CE, however today and for quite some time we know that is very unlikely and is only the hypothetically earliest date possible after the Roman destruction of the temple during their Siege of Jerusalem, many scholars are actually of the opinion based on studying the text material fragments that “Mark” (the Mark version known today) was probably written circa. 90-120 CE or most probably even later, and all the gospels probably as late as the 3rd century, circa 200 CE, because what they read like before that we don’t know because there’s no sources or fragments). Basically the only thing that can be gleaned from the text of the oldest first anonymously written “Mark” author story with any certainty is that the Jesus character was a man with human parents who was eventually sentenced to death with the Sanhedrin’s urging and then he soon died fairly quickly never being heard or seen again by anyone, with no later added text about walking through walls afterwards or zombifying floating to the clouds or a babbling in tongues party (hint-hint scamvangelists and your infernal verbal diarrhea) or any promised miracles and snake handling superpowers etc. Mark’s story simply ends with some scared women running from a tomb with some guy sitting inside and then saying nothing to anyone about anything and then close the curtains and put on the theatre lights basically, end of the movie folks and please remember to put your litter in the bin on the way out.

In a way the Scooby-Doo Mystery Inc gang really are like today’s unbiased researchers, biblical scholars and investigating mythicist academics and others who are finding, examining and exposing all the numerous contradictions, failed predictions and claims, historical inaccuracies, primitive pretend world cosmology errors, forged, censured and interpolated fraudulent text materials evidences, Bronze and Iron Age origins of the fables, abstract concepts, magical thinking and blood magic behaviorisms, examining the religious and cultural syncretism, diffusion and patterns of mutating cults and sects pretend world theologies in the shared geographically coterminous areas etc and much, much, much more (where even just asking any questions, disbelieving or even just doubting any textual or theological guru claims could have gotten them and anyone else killed for not believing not that long ago), and of course including as part of their examinations today’s known and proven real world evidences from scientists, archaeologists, paleontologists etc (right from the talking snake who duped the smartest god of the garden and the first original incestuous Adam’s family times to Joshua stopping the earth from rotating times to 2,000 demon-possessed swine times and all the way up to floating freshly made immortal spacesuit body zombies to the clouds, multi-headed and bodied winged anthropomorphic creatures, beasts and dragons out of the sea and horses with lions heads and tails made of biting snakes times), which put the final nails in the coffin, or the pretend coffin or whatever. And of course easily proving that telescamvangelists and similar lying fabulist con artist charlatans really are just bullshitism shekels seeds actors pure and simple.

However, there’s even much more problematic issues regarding dates beyond what I mentioned above. Believe it or not even the Jesus mentioned in the Jewish Talmud has described Jesus as living around 75 BCE, one Talmud account tells that “Jesus the Nazarene” was stoned and hanged to death by the Jews on the Eve of Passover as well as that Jesus is being punished by boiling in hot bubbling excrement (shit/dung) because he practiced magic and deceived and led Israel astray (Well there you go, he was a bad, bad, bad Jesus trying to lead astray Israel so now it’s the bubbling boiling shit pot punishment for him, he broke the laws of Moses after all which were given by Yahweh-Jehovah god himself and so he rightfully suffered the consequences, and it’s written right there in the text). It’s interesting to note although not particularly correlated to this example, that the very name Israel actually and literally means “fighter against god” or “the one who fights/wrestles against god” (Yisrael) which is very interesting to say the least. Whether you believe any of the biblical stories or not, either way you have to admit that the Jesus character in the narratives was ultimately put to death because he broke the laws of Moses, which were laws given by god. There are accounts that have Jesus being crucified under Alexander Jannaeus (83 BCE), “Jesus the sorcerer” is noted for being executed by the Hasmonean government which lost legal authority in 63 BC, or in his 50s by Herod Agrippa I under the rule of Claudius Caesar (41–54 CE).

And many other facts that are interrelated with the topic which add much more problems, such as even the dates of the gospels novels themselves and the amount of different gospels that were circulating (and for how long?) since the earliest period of the later mutating so-called “Christian” religion. It’s a fact that the vast majority of people don’t even know or put any thought into exactly who, when, where or why the various text came into existence or even which audience the text was actually written and meant for, when they read the OT and NT text (unless you’re an ancient Israelite in ancient Canaan battling the Nephilim it isn’t even meant for you anyway). For instance all NT papyri examined have numerous scholars who give a more accurate date of the late 4th century, not 1st century as many wish, claim and would like people to believe. The book of Acts is dated based on the Gospels and church tradition which didn’t even exist yet at such an early time period (prognosis: interpolations and inserted text chicanery). Paul material is dated based on Acts. The earliest access to any Pauline texts that church tradition “claims” is around 150 CE having been found by Marcion, however evidences show that all of the later gospels fragments are post Emperor Antoninous Pius and Luke is probably as late as Emperor Commodus at the turn of the 3rd century CE. However most people are not aware there were numerous Gnostic and mystery religion themed “Gospels” already in the 1st century which were all considered the earliest so-called “Christian gospels” (about 90 gospels at least and many more letters, codexes, scrolls, books and text material, many, many cults and sects and each one claiming to be the truth), these and later adapted ideas from previous Platonic, Gnostic and Jewish Hellenistic philosophy and other older mystery religions characters, powers and concepts, ala Philo, Cerinthus, Zalmoxis, Zoroaster, Dionysus, Orpheus, Prometheus, Mithras and many others, which mutated multiple times in various ways through the later centuries of editing, additions, removals and censurings (ala the good ol’ Eusebius’ fabrications and many others) only then eventually leading to what can be generally considered the 1st bible only in the 4th century (although different bibles were also to be found including different gospels and letters, the 4th century Codex Vaticanus and later Codex Sinaiticus were both written in Greek and both are missing numerous text paragraphs and phrases that are found in today’s bible versions (Why? ask Benny Hinn…which obviously means they were “inserted” later by anonymous translators and scribes, by whom and when exactly? good question).

When the failed apocalyptic cult leader Rabbi Jesus character wasn’t going around doing magic tricks, curing fevers, bleedings and making demon-possessed swine, he had to hide the dinosaur fossils so as to prove his genealogy goes directly back to Adam and the very beginning and origins of the planet and universe, so then people and archaeologists these days finding them must be skeptical infidel gentile heretics intentionally disobeying the truths of god and his bible word which he wrote, which is blatant nefarious necromantical diabolicalism pure and simple and deserving the eternal hellfire and pitchforking.

The Codex Vaticanus and Codex Sinaiticus are the 2 oldest bibles dated to the circa. mid-4th century, they also have books material that are different from each other, so today we have material they don’t have and they have material different from each other, and it’s material we don’t have in any version, on top of that today we have text material that neither of them had (and the same goes for many other texts from before that, many of which are vastly different, later deemed heretical by so-called “church fathers” gurus). Acts and the letters of the purported Paul character (and writers speaking/writing for already long dead Paul, aka pseudo-Paul and “Pauline” letters by scholars) are especially comprised of numerous contradictory “patchwork” letter fragments with much gnosticism and mystery religion beliefs and abstract esoteric concepts included, (even the character Paul is obviously a Gnostic according to many scholars because he never even speaks about an actual earthly life of any earthly physical Jesus character ever and he knows absolutely nothing about any earthly life, earthly birth, words or parables spoken, no disciples, miracles or any events that took place and he was even alive at the time…supposedly, he never even quotes any Jesus character not even once which is very strange (It would have come in handy if he would have reminded his audience “Remember when Jesus said this or did that thing….”, don’t you think so and wouldn’t that make sense and solidify his position to listeners/readers? Instead he obviously knows nothing about any earthly life of any Jesus character walking around and doing things on earth), Paul’s written letters instead revolve around a hazy blurry vague enigmatic “Christ” character in space somewhere who resurrected somewhere in the cosmos after being crucified by mutinous angels Archons somewhere in the nebulous ether layers of outer space (just like numerous other much older pagan religions superhero characters likewise resurrected themselves as saviors for their followers then giving eternal life to followers, because if you want lots of followers to be wowed your superhero simply has to resurrect from the dead basically, resurrecting saviors were popular fads already for centuries, it was a thing).

To show just what sort of convoluted, mixed-up, contradictions-filled, dubious, tangled, complex and perplexing labyrinthian maze the early centuries of the new religion were and of their written materials, and in many cases gospels being vastly different from each other holding very different views and beliefs…As mentioned above the Codex Vaticanus and Codex Sinaiticus are the 2 oldest bibles dated to the circa. mid-4th century, they also have books material that are different from each other, so today we have material they don’t have and they have material different from each other, and it’s material we don’t have in any version, on top of that today we have text material that neither of them had. It is thought that there were as many as almost 100 or more different gospels circulating in the earliest centuries before any of the first bibles, Codex Vaticanus and Codex Sinaiticus, were manufactured. It is such a bizarre incongruous problematic situation and endeavor that the further back you go to attempt to learn the original sources and beliefs of the religion and clarify any very basic fundamental foundational “original” beliefs, characters, events and premises from the earliest writings, that you instead actually know less and less and less and are instead confronted with a wall of mythomania confusion, and then enter a murky void and a wide churning sea of conflicting beliefs and then bombarded with many different stories, ideas and narratives swirling in a vortex of theological affiliations, groups, cults and sects (i.e. – the person may have hoped to find a kernel of unquestionable evidence and without a doubt proof about something being fact or at least a correct view about something, but then soon realizes they have instead opened a Pandora’s Box of stories, characters, events, hocus pocus, magical thinking, hyper-superstitious primitive behaviorisms, abstract concepts and theologies all going on simultaneously during the same early centuries). And you then also learn from the earliest writings and information that up to and even after the Council of Nicaea in 325 CE that the greatest enemies and threat of the now so-called “church fathers” and new state religion were not the Greeks, Romans or even any other Pagan peoples at all, but instead actually “Christians”, yep “other Christians”, Christians who followed the various other and oldest original written sources and stories. Basically the first 3 centuries of Christianity was an unknown mysterious forsaken abode of mythomanias and Christians at war with each other along with constant charges of heresy back and forth, there actually wasn’t even a specific authoritative legitimate defining of what the religion’s specific beliefs or sources were until forced to come up with some very basic premises at the 4th century Nicaean Council initiated by the emperor Constantine, as in come to a basic agreement about what the religion is about very soon or else, and then presto-magico a new religion for the empire is born, How’s that for bizarre labyrinthian, scandalous and outlandish peculiar? Before that Christianity was mostly a 3 centuries long free-for-all full of disputes, arguments, condemnations, back and forth heresy charges and with no actual “official beliefs”. And if that wasn’t bad and problematic enough, they are all pseudepigraphical or anonymous written gospel works, anonymously written just like the eventual gospels-novels that bibles have today. Just some of the gospels written during those early “pre-1st bible” centuries are…

Gospel of Anonymous (author unknown, name “Mark” applied later)
Gospel of Anonymous (author unknown, name “Matthew” applied later)
Gospel of Anonymous (author unknown, name “Luke” applied later)
Gospel of Anonymous (author unknown, name “John” applied later)
Gospel of Thomas
Gospel of Truth
Gospel of Nicodemus (also known as the “Acts of Pilate”)
Gospel of Barnabas
Gospel of Gamaliel
Holy Book of the Great Invisible Spirit
Life of John the Baptist
Infancy Gospels
Gospel of the Nativity of Mary
Gospel of Pseudo-Matthew
Infancy Gospel of Thomas
Infancy Gospel of James
Arabic Infancy Gospel
Syriac Gospel of the Boyhood of our Lord Jesus

The Nag Hammadi Library, among which the Gospel of Thomas & the Gospel of Truth were rediscovered

Gospel of Judas
Gospel of Peter
Gospel of Mary
Gospel of Philip
Dialogue of the Savior
Papyrus Egerton 2
Gospel of Eve
Fayyum Fragment
Gospel of Mani
Oxyrhynchus Gospels
Gospel of the Saviour
Gospel of the Twelve
Reconstructed Gospels
Gospel of the Ebionites
Gospel of the Egyptians
Gospel of the Hebrews
Secret Gospel of Mark
Gospel of Matthias
Gospel of the Nazoraeans
Signs Gospel
Cross Gospel
Lost Gospels
Gospel of Bartholomew
Gospel of the Seventy
Gospel of the Four Heavenly Realms
Gospel of Perfection
Gospel of Marcion (believed by many scholars to be the 1st unedited original but later changed and named gospel of Luke)
Gospel of Basilides
Gospel of Andrew
Gospel of Apelles
Gospel of Cerinthus
Gospel of Bardesanes
Gospel of the Encratites
Gospel of the Gnostics
Gospel of Hesychius
Gospel of Lucius
Gospel of Longinus
Gospel of Manes
Gospel of Merinthus
Gospel of Scythianus
Gospel of Simonides
Gospel of Tatian
Gospel of Thaddaeus
Gospel of Valentinus
The Clementine Gospel

And since on the topic, here’s just another partial list of other apocryphal and apocalyptic books, many of which were even quoted from and believed by some so-called early “church fathers”, most of them also pseudepigraphical or anonymous, anonymous just like the gospels-novels in today’s bibles…

List of acts
The following list is not exhaustive.

Acts of Andrew
Acts of Andrew and Bartholomew 
Acts of Barnabas
Acts of John
The Lost Chapter of the Acts of the Apostles
Acts of Mar Mari
Acts of the Martyrs
Martyrdom of Polycarp
Acts of the Scillitan Martyrs
Passion of Saint Perpetua, Saint Felicitas, and their Companions
Acta proconsularia Cypriani
Acta Maximiliani
Acta Alexandrinorum
Acts of Paul
Acts of Paul and The Twelve
Acts of Peter
Acts of Peter and Paul
Acts of Peter and the Twelve
Acts of Philip
Acts of Pilate
Acts of Thomas
Acts of Timothy

Apocryphal and apocalyptic literature
The following list is not exhaustive.

3 Enoch
History of Joseph the Carpenter
Epistle of Barnabas
The Shepherd of Hermes
Apocalypse of Abraham
Apocalypse of Adam
Apocalypse of Elijah
Apocalypse of Moses
Apocalypse of Sedrach
Apocalypse of Zephaniah
Apocalypse of Zerubbabel
Aramaic Apocalypse
Gabriel’s Revelation
Genesis Apocryphon
Greek Apocalypse of Baruch
Greek Apocalypse of Daniel
Greek Apocalypse of Ezra
Syriac Apocalypse of Baruch
Apocalypse of Golias
Apocalypse of Paul
Apocalypse of Peter
Apocalypse of Pseudo-Methodius
Ascension of Isaiah
Apocalypse of Samuel of Kalamoun
Apocalypse of Stephen
Apocalypse of Thomas
Gnostic Apocalypse of Peter
First Apocalypse of James
Second Apocalypse of James
Coptic Apocalypse of Paul

…the above list doesn’t even include all the various early so-called Christian Gnostic groups themselves who existed at the same earliest time and many of which we know about by name, and it’s also only a partial list of the gospels known about that fortunately weren’t completely wiped out and destroyed by the later censuring and editing so-called church fathers politburo committees along with their “state backing”, and you sure didn’t want to go against or complain about “state backing” that’s fore sure because it could be very, very, very hazardous to your health (because if you don’t actually do something relevant and useful that actually contributes something to society, civilization, to actual real knowledge and progress (farming, fishing, making pottery and metalwork, textiles, stonecraft, cleaning latrines etc) or write books about poetry, music, art, philosophy, math or science books etc, but you’re instead pathologically fixated-obsessed and neurotically consumed from sunrise to sunset with these interwoven stories and ideas originating from the same ancient primitive deserts cults and societies and their national myths writings (including even going into isolation in remote areas so as to pray and burn candles even more for some reason, and even cases of living in caves for more solitude so as to write and chant even more, various monasteries galore that for the most part serve absolutely no purpose or make any difference in the real world), then you’re naturally going to see lots of gospels written and preachers fabulizing and fables preaching trying to get lots of converts, just like in the more ancient OT times where anonymous sects and gurus were dreaming up all sorts of invented theologies and regulations, abstract concepts ideas, failed predictions, midnight gematria calculations, fake cryptic visions claims and unfounded bogus histories, and even claiming demons were behind blindness, premature deaths, sicknesses, abnormalities and diseases, demons were even believed by ancient Israelites to be found in bodies of water which caused blindness after drinking from it and similar absurdities…however today people like Pat Robertson think demons are also found in clothes, so better be careful next time at the store shirts and pants racks I guess, magical thinking is just so exciting isn’t it?), many gospels of which differed greatly on numerous important points, some believing the Jesus character was just a man, others that he was a phantom and never a physical man, and not even mentioning anything about any crucifixion, death, resurrection, no final judgement or apocalypse etc, him being sentenced to death by different people at different times, or even him not being any sort of messiah type character for anyone at all and especially not for the entire planet, and many of them also claiming direct descent to the first original believers and oral truths long before today’s known, edited and mutated gospels-novels. Anyway, back to the delusional mystical cryptic lying Paul writer and his immortal zombies, new genderless floating spacesuit bodies and end of the world doomsday happening in his lifetime as guaranteed by his personal celestial skylord in outer space…


(Image for illustrative purposes only).

The strange and very odd thing about the presented “Paul” character according to the fables narrative of the “purported” Paul letters (and even putting aside for a moment the fact that numerous and probably most biblical scholars agree that at least half of them are faked pseudographical works by other later writers pretending to be him, aka “Pauline letters”), is that the Paul character actually spent more of his time complaining about, debating with and even getting into fights with other so-called “Christians” than against any Pagans or Romans (i.e. – people who were even so-called “Christians” before he was (but even that was a loose ill-defined term not even explaining what it is exactly that they believed or who their “Christ” even was, because “Christ” is a title not a name, a very commonly used title actually and simply meaning “Anointed One” and the Hebrew “Messiah” meaning the same and it was even a title used by and ascribed to quite a number of holy hero/rebel/king type Jewish individuals for centuries and very commonly applied to Jewish priests in the OT texts who were likewise deemed “Anointed Ones”, being “a Christ-Anointed One-Messiah” was already popular and a thing for centuries and really nothing new because Moses, Joshua, David and a bunch of others were already previous “Christs”), and according to the text they even already had their own small cultic centers/churches, which was usually just a room somewhere or even just a gathering somewhere), and that besides not knowing anything about any physical Jesus character actually being born, having a family, living and travelling and hocus pocus adventuring on earth (because the so-called “Gospels” and “Acts” were written decades and even up to over a century later), he strangely also believed and was adamant and absolutely sure that he was going to float to the clouds and into outer space any day or any hour and be given a new immortal genderless spacesuit body and a fresh brand spanking new fancy robe, and then meet other risen zombies who also are given new genderless spacesuit bodies and new robes and then all together listen to a trumpet concert floating around the clouds with his imaginary celestial outer space-Jesus character (aka the 3rd coming to some) being all immortal and stuff, as well as afterwards co-ruling as priests a worldwide commie-utopianist marxist personality-identity-reality destroying global theocratic government temple-state…forever, and even with Jerusalem as the capital city of the entire planet for some weird lame pointless but “theologically important” reason, but it’s still lame, weird and pointlessly absurd anyway. Another point which clearly and unequivocally shows and proves the Paul character was an absolute blithering idiot and a mentally ill deranged and delusional obsessed psychopath (a diseased mind basically), is that he was was preaching for people to not even bother getting married. That’s right!…he was so positive sure from his given visions informations that his apocalyptic end of the world was happening in his lifetime and was maybe just days or hours away, that he preached it was pointless for people to even get married or to even think about marriage or having kids!…because there was so little time left. Even just that one singular particular point is more than enough to bury his religious lunatic rantings to the horse manure pile permanently, because that’s a humongous massive self-inflicted death punch fail. The main point being though is that his purportedly presented deranged abnormal preaching and scribbling, his obsessive delusional psychopathic disorder filth ramblings, his esoteric mystical personal apocalyptic blood magic beliefs, his pathological obsessive self-hypnosis imaginary “Pretend World” of nonexistent characters, events, places and universes and abstract concepts theologizing in the “purported” letters/epistles turned out to be a total snafu fail and didn’t happen as he claimed it would, it even turned out to be the opposite just like many other previous OT predictions and hopes, just one of many Jewish sectarian apocalyptic cult gurus that existed at the time and before him, the best way to describe it colloquially in the vernacular is basically just a series of solitary written long torturously boring pretend world contradictory esoteric magical thinking mystical cryptic exposition brain farts, that’s the truth of it. In a way he was the first proselytizing William Miller and the Great Disappointment and even the first original Charles Taze Russel and Jehovah’s Witness’ and their later wacko theologies and various disappointments too, I discuss them at my first post here).

(At this point let me just stop momentarily and repeat one of the highlighted points above, but with some added context according to the purported letters and the presented written text narrative…PAUL PREACHED THAT PEOPLE SHOULD NOT BOTHER GETTING MARRIED, PAUL THINKS HIS FOLLOWERS SHOULD NOT BE PLANNING A MARRIAGE OR EVEN THINK ABOUT HAVING KIDS, PAUL THINKS IT WOULD BE BEST FOR ALL CHRISTIANS TO LIVE LIKE HIM AND BE SPENDING TIME MOSTLY IN PRAYER (LIVING LIKE A MONK BASICALLY, PAUL DID NOT EVEN BELIEVE LOVE WAS A PART OF MARRIAGE, HE INSTEAD BELIEVED THAT REAL LOVE WAS UNQUESTIONING SLAVE-SHEEP OBEDIENCE TO HIS CELESTIAL YOM-KIPPPUR GOAT SKYLORD & HIS FATHER YAHWEH-JEVOVAH, THAT BEING A NON-THINKING SLAVE TO THEM WAS ACTUALLY THE BEST REAL LOVE..(an undeniable obvious proof that Paul was a pathological sectarian cult guru consumed fixated and obsessed with his crypto-mystical esoteric pretend world new theologies doctrines in his kabbalistic delusional brains, he was never married and most probably never dated, or had sex, and probably never even kissed a girl and was most probably a virgin his entire life, and on top of that his belief that followers become “brothers” of his celestial yom kippur goat skylord yet simultaneously they also become his “bride” also has obvious obscure cultish sectarian-homoerotic undertones which adds further to his unhinged state of mind and cryptic-mystical self-conversations inventions in his mind)…BECAUSE ACCORDING TO PAUL “WITHOUT A DOUBT” THE END OF THE WORLD WAS HAPPENING “WITHIN…HIS…LIFETIME” AND WAS PERHAPS JUST DAYS OR EVEN HOURS AWAY, ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY SURE WITHOUT A DOUBT…AND STRANGELY ONLY AFTER A NUMBER OF DECADES AFTER PAUL AND HIS SO-CALLED JERUSALEM SECT “CONTACTS” (WHOM HE CALLS “THE 12”) HAD ALL ALREADY DIED (OR IF EVEN ACTUALLY EXISTED, I.E. – BECAUSE ENTER DECADES OF NOTHING, NO WRITTEN MATERIAL, NO HISTORICAL RECORD MENTIONS AND JUST CRICKETS UNTIL THE JERUSALEM TEMPLE AND CITY DESTRUCTION)…ONLY THEN DID ANY SO-CALLED ANONYMOUS GOSPELS-NOVELS EVEN START TO BE THOUGHT OF OR INVENTED, DEVISED AND FINALLY WRITTEN, and when you factor in the previous grass-roots Jewish apocalyptic movement of a competing John the baptizer sect from decades previously (another connected simultaneous total fail btw)…

Strangely, besides purported Paul’s usual various weird abstract ideas, beliefs and claims in the alleged/presented letters, such as his belief in an impending doomsday apocalypse guaranteed by his Jesus skylord to be happening any day or any hour in his lifetime, his simultaneous risen zombies in new spacesuit bodies floating to the clouds adventure, his disdain for marriage, for having or even planning to have children, his belief that love was not a part of marriage but that instead real love was unquestioning irrational slave-sheep love for his celestial yom-kippur goat skylord and his father yahweh-jehovah (basically that being an unthinking unreasoning unquestioning slave to “his” skylord in “his” mind was instead the real love, talk about unhinged sectarian fanatic) etc, one piece of text that gets overlooked is his very odd statement in Galatians 5:12, where he is complaining about people who don’t agree with him…”As for those agitators, I wish they would go the whole way and emasculate themselves!”. i.e. – he literally wishes they wouldn’t just castrate themselves but actually instead go the whole distance and cut off their entire “whole package”, as in not just cut off their kielbasa but cut off “all parts included”, which sure is wacko for the supposed writing founder of the new religion (why not just wishing their eyes or mouths would glue shut, or their ears start growing potatoes or their tongues turning into cow’s tongues or covered in boils, or wishing them getting really bad hemorrhoids or leprosy or even just cut off their own fingers and hands would be sufficient enough I think). His words like this combined with his statement “I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me” (but strangely his god refused each time) has led many biblical scholars to put the puzzle pieces together and surmise that Paul was most probably a closet homosexual, or gay, queer or whatever the politically correct term is these days (I’m totally straight and I have no interest or opinion about the topic or his ideas about the subject whatsoever, but according to the narrative of his own written words that’s what the biblical scholars think is the case, either way it’s all very strange and peculiar stuff to be writing and concerned about and shows that the founder and first writer of the new religion had extremely demented weird turn ons).
According to the presented magical thinking Paul character and his purported pretend world delusional cryptic esoteric mystical letters-writings (the very 1st ever original “Christian writer” in history before anyone anywhere ever, before anyone else ever in the history of Zion, Galilee and Judea..as in the founder of the new religion and very first writer about a supposed celestial Jesus skylord character ever in the history of the world before anyone else ever), he believed that he along with his fellow apocalyptic doomsday blood magic cultists would very soon during Paul’s lifetime float up past the clouds into outer space to receive new immortal spacesuit bodies, meet up with previous similar raised zombies with new spacesuit bodies and then all together meet his celestial yom kippur goat skylord superhero to zap and destroy all the nations, and then as a bonus help control and rule the planet forever from the Jerusalem temple HQ for the great Yahwehism-Jehovahism global theocracy dictatorship kingdom temple-state.
(of course it never happened because then you wouldn’t exist, or the internet, or your computer, or knowledge about ancient civilizations and populations or dinosaurs, about the real round planet earth, the real reasons behind diseases not being demons and how to cure them without blood magic sacrifices, about galaxies and the universe and lots and lots of other things and pizza toppings and salad dressings wouldn’t even exist either, but above is a simulation of what it would have looked like of space bound Paul transforming at the sound of a trumpet going up to the clouds, pretty impressive stuff actually you have to admit…”Up, up and awaaay! Glo-Ry Hallelujah!”).
Paul’s celestial skylord Jesus arriving from outer space in the clouds to Jerusalem to defeat and enslave the Gentiles and then BBQ the nations eternally with the eternal immortal burning worms, then set up his Yahwehism-Jehovahism global theocracy commie-utopianist identity-destroying mind control dictatorship kingdom and temple-state planet (including a brand new “Mall of Zion” with an astonishing 777 movie theatres, 77 wave pools, 70 beach volleyball courts and an astounding 12 km long all-you-can-eat free shrimp and lobster buffet table).
The so-called “rapture” adventure concept preached by apostle-witches and televangelists these days is not even found in the bible, and it was actually supposed to be the zombifications and new spacesuit bodies floating to the clouds adventure guaranteed to happen during purported Paul’s lifetime by his celestial skylord, which obviously didn’t happen and so is a big fail. However just for pretend world entertainment: “Gosh we’ve been left behind! Yipeee! more fresh air and cleaner water now! and way shorter lineups at the drive thru and donut shops too! Glo-Ry!
When everything in the presented narrative texts and Paul’s purported letters is examined, as well as the associated magical thinking and behaviorisms, Paul then is really acting no different from any other new shady cryptic guru, soothsayer mystic or pagan oracle visionary from centuries long before his time or the ones after including even today, he’s just yet another typical spiritualist with strange ideas and new theologies, he’s a dime a dozen channeler and ho-hum phony self-styled clairvoyant of personally invented magical thinking secrets and new theological construct ideas, at the end of the day he’s especially just another unhinged failed apocalyptic doomsday fortune-teller guru with his own sectarian kabbalistic agenda mimicking the same ways of many others before him no more and no less and that’s the facts (basically just like a Jim Bakker and his gang these days, just like many other televangelist’s personal invented shticks and performances). And if that isn’t problematic and highly dubious enough, he combines it with “his” own cherry picked OT text excerpts and then using new magical thinking pesher mental gymnastics interpretations to give new abstract ideas, concepts and “personal” meanings to the text that isn’t even there or saying what he says it says…where a metaphor is an intentional personal misinterpretation of an allegory of a contradiction for the lord, which may be a metaphor or an allegory or perhaps even real in his pretend world mind during his self-conversations. And then finally as a deceptive nefarious mind control trick cherry on top he basically slyly claims “Oh but you don’t have believe me and my new personal theological feelings and my new ideas pretend world in my mind, but if you don’t then you get the eternal burning BBQ forever and the burning worms and the burning flames being scorched eternally, and you sure as darn dang don’t want that now DO YOU???!!! (he basically had to do that to get the invented nonexistent cryptic esoteric OT information secrets that his skylord phantasm didn’t tell him in his brains, so he naturally had to invent it using magical thinking and contradictory mental gymnastics to hear it, or to say that he heard it anyway, so that the entire planet can enter and live in his pretend world mind too and float to the clouds and outer space with him).

It’s also very weird and odd and deceitful suspicious, that the commonly told story of Paul falling on the road to Damascus after being blinded by a bright light vision of the celestial outer space Jesus phantasm character, is not actually told or written by Paul or even implied by him in any of his letters, it was only written several decades later in the very dubious “Acts” book by an anonymous Pauline sect author (part of a “new” two-part Luke-Acts Christian epic heroic narrative that many scholars recognize as following the pattern of Vergil’s Aeneid and the Homeric epics Odyssey and the Iliad, however very strange again none of the other gospels-novels authors know anything about the epic stories either which really is very strange, knowing genealogies stretching all the way back to Adam but not about super-duper Paul apostle the founder? it just wasn’t important? or because it just wasn’t invented yet?), which included quite a number of other contradictory, wrong and new highly nonsensical information only after alleged “Paul” was already long dead. According to his very own alleged and presented letters account narrative the supposed Paul character actually only received his secret abstract esoteric cryptic visions and theological magical thinking information news scoops only by way of some hazy secret metaphysical self-hypnosis that he doesn’t fully describe or even get into, always with only himself being present and nobody else, he just calls them revelations “from” or “of” the lord and this is again clearly admitted in his Galatians letter where he writes the son was not revealed “to” him but revealed “in” him (sure he did, it’s just a secret between just only him and his celestial skylord in his brains and fragmenting confused mind, he even tells about an out of body experience slinging the same ol’ hash as numerous other fabulist soothsayers in history), Paul is clearly admitting to a sort of Gnostic esoteric crypto-mystical personal self-conversation taking place in his mind, which is vastly different and contrary to the later new “Acts” novel. In his own letters Paul makes absolutely no mention about having any blinding vision conversion while being with any other people on any road anywhere, that Damascus road story was instead invented several decades later by an anonymous Pauline sect propaganda writing anonymous someone long after Paul would have been dead. Above is a visual representation of Paul receiving his personal mystical cryptic informations, esoteric tips visions and secrets about an apocalypse doomsday happening soon in his lifetime personally guaranteed to him directly from his celestial Jesus Yom Kippur goat skylord in outer space, who’s also god and who’s actually the real Adam as mentioned previously.

…and if the Paul’s failed apocalyptic immortal spacesuit bodies and zombies day isn’t bad and ridiculous enough, in 1 Corinthians 15: 3-5 his version of a new celestial Jesus apparitions story does not agree with and is contradictory again with the later gospels-novels versions and problematic throughout. The Paul author’s alleged apparitions ghost story narrative is different and problematic in chronology, in the people involved in sightings, the locations where they allegedly happened and the numbers of people who saw anything compared to the later gospels versions. i.e. – the entire NT doesn’t even mention anything about any 500 people seeing any Jesus ghost anywhere as only Paul does, Paul also doesn’t mention any women seeing a Jesus apparition at the tomb which was well before any of “the 12” or anybody else as written in the Matthew story (Paul doesn’t even mention any women seeing any apparition in his chronological list), the gospels-novels themselves are also greatly contradictory even among themselves about any purported apparitions…where, who, when, how many and in what order, there are contradictory problems all over the place. This is because the ghost story kept changing, mutating and being added onto, added onto right into the 2nd century and even later just like the rest of the gospels narratives (largely because they were adapted from and modelled after other older Pagan mythologies, ghost stories and their dying and rising heroes/demigods legends already known and popular for centuries in the area, to be discussed a little later), much later the last so-called “John” gospel-novel authors eventually even equate the Jesus character into being the Yahweh-Jehovah god himself! lol, pure mutating, evolving and changing new sectarian apocalyptic theologies changing even further through the centuries. (Which are easily understood and obvious evidences again that we are not reading any sort of actual real history or real world historical events but are instead just reading pretend world fictions invented by a few obsessed writers with theological agendas, spreading fabricated fictions just like the entire OT Hebrew bible is mostly fiction and mythomanias, the modus operandi remained the same).


As explained above, the Jesus character apparitions ghosts stories from purported Paul to right through each of the decades and century later anonymous gospels novels and Acts book, is basically like a game of whack a mole in trying to figure out what the mole said and where, when and to whom. e.g. – “The apparition ghost appeared here and said this and that to such and such and then such and such…nope it appeared to such and such first and said this and that…nope the ghost apparition never even appeared to anyone ever what are you guys even talking about…nope you’re all wrong the apparition ghost appeared here and over there not over there instead saying this and that and the other thing to such and such and some others and then a bunch of others, etc and so on. Luke actually doesn’t even mention any of the “appearances” reported by Matthew, he even explicitly contradicts him regarding an appearance at the tomb and replaces Galilee with Jerusalem as the sole ghostly apparition location. Matthew anonymous author instead has a great earthquake, an alien angel shoot down like bright lightning who then zaps the guards unconscious and then rolls the stone himself and then casually sits on it chatting like a Joyce Meyer or Pat Robertson at a coffee and cake fundraising shindig, Luke author has just 2 measly bright glowing aliens appear but only after the stone is already moved, original Mark author has just 1 bright glowing alien guy inside after already moving the stone, the last anonymous John author?…”John” has ABSOLUTELY NO GLOWING ALIEN GUYS OR ANYONE in the tomb at all, so everyone just leaves because it was completely empty with no bright glowing aliens anywhere, NOT EVEN A MEASLY PIGEON. We see then a fiction-vortex of each writing author’s narrative being different and each telling a different contradictory phantom-ghost story with the events, chronology and characters only how they personally wanted them to be (one version the phantom says to meet him in Jerusalem, another version has it the phantom told them to meet him 80 miles more north in Galilee instead, in my military days all these unverified anonymous contradictory claims would be simply called a shitshow, clusterf**k or snafu because of all the obvious errors, or these days in the vernacular just simply bullshitism), the anonymous writers are basically putting the ghost apparition/mole and the supporting glowing aliens characters wherever they wanted and having them saying and doing whatever to whoever and whenever they wanted also, just like the game (like a game of ghosts and goblins, or ghosts and demons more precisely, which is basically in the same ballpark anyway…”He’s there get that varmint! Oh no I mean he’s over there, that’s where he is get him! Dang darn dang I mean he’s popping up over there, that’s where he is! Arrrgh! this time I’m sure he’s appearing way over there instead, that’s what I meant, this time I’m sure dang it all!!!!”)…unless of course, as a growing number of ancient paranormal phenomena theorists suggest, and which the facts clearly show is the most probable explanation…that it was in fact Hyperborean acolyte gatekeepers of the great Power Cosmic who came down during the times of the gospels-novels authors writing their stories and zapped their minds with muddled magical thinking contradictions and confusion visions so as to prove to future generations that they are in fact reading deceitful myths invented by nefarious blood magic fabulists and ancient deserts magic apocalyptic apostles-witches intentionally trying to hide the real facts and truths from their reading and listening audiences, just as they already did against the OT writers also, such as when Hyperborean gatekeepers confounded the minds of the book of genesis authors with magical thinking deliriums and confusion-contradictions so as to believe in erroneous natural world sciences, blood magic sorcery and magical fruit etc, or the instances of the 2 Samuel and 1 Chronicles example (seen later below) where the Hyperboreans befogged the author’s minds to unknowingly admit in their very own writing to posterity that their Yahweh was in fact Satan and vice versa (a contradiction that is also found in a number of other OT textual material sources), and so thus cementing their fate to the sociopathic Yahweh-Jehovah tribal warrior-genie and his precepts which they also invented for themselves as a personal cult deity and the required associative primitive thinking patterns and behaviorisms, the various many facts and very problematic textual materials discussed thus far then proves this is unequivocally the case.

and the alleged so-called “Paul’s epistles” material which is strangely, but then again really not strange at all when everything is factored in and looked at more closely from an overall better view of the geographically coterminous and religio-cultural beliefs coterminous area and time period…particularly strange being the similar parallels and even including quoted excerpts, phrases and titles and connections to the ancient desert Qumran Caves dwelling Jewish apocalyptic sects including the well-known Essenes and their various Dead Sea Scrolls mystical magical cryptical ruminations (and other dubious sectarian literature and theologies beliefs, various already existing Gnostic theologies and other anonymous spurious mystical apocryphal written material from the time (that in numerous instances also expected a new appearing messiah-savior type person who would zap and melt annihilate their enemies the gentile Greeks and Romans especially and then rule a new powerful kingdom based in Jerusalem and the temple, which also never happened and instead the opposite actually happened), which when understood more thoroughly then clearly shows again and proves that we are not dealing with and reading about just a singular individual so-called Paul character’s purportedly original mind control inventions and fabulizing shtick during his impending outer space skylord’s immortal zombifications mission, but that on the contrary we are clearly dealing with a continuum and wide range of “already existing” and known about interconnected sinister tangled webs of underworld secret doomsday sects and obscure abstract concepts cryptical mystics cults (John the baptizer and his sect being just one example that was appropriated later for new invented gospels-novels plots stories) and theologies groups in the area and so as a result we are actually dealing with a dark underworld nefarious bubbling brew concoction and commixture of various changing, transmogrifying, mutating, branching off and further mutating ideas of fanatical apocalyptic doomsday death cults and cryptic blood magic sects of ancient Palestine of which we have an abundance of evidence for that they existed at the time, a sort of underworld secret parallel-society of apocalyptic obsessed fanatics in a doomsday psychosis alternate world reality living in the shadows, crevices and even literally in desert caves expecting the end of the world in their lifetimes, and that’s regarding only just the Jewish Hebrew and Aramaic written material sources of the Essenes and Qumran community sect and not all the other contemporary influences and scrolls sources or even the earlier ideas, traditions and customs…from the ancient Sumerians, Babylonians, Mesopotamia, Akkadians, Egyptians, Assyrians, Zoroastrianism, as well as influences from the already existing Greco-Roman mystery religions and other local Canaanite religions in the neighborhood just partly discussed here)…

Basically in a nutshell, the nefariously deceptive modus operandi used in fooling many humanoids into thinking that a new on the scene and mutating fictional puny, irrational, immensely ignorant, failed and exceedingly failed predictor and contradictory primitive Bronze-Iron Age local desert volcano-warrior tribal deity (that strangely was mostly concerned with blood magic sacrifices sorcery, wrath smitings and wrath pestilences, self-fetishization speeches, keeping slavery legal, legalizing rape, infanticide and genocide, obsessed with penis foreskins and menstruation cooties, superstitious behaviorisms laws enforcement and just only the very local puny real estate market oddly enough, actually the very local real estate market was basically the main thing and what he was all about in the first place like a great cosmic all-knowing most powerful real estate god), is somehow for unknown reasons and without a shred of evidence (but there being mountains of contradictory evidences proving otherwise) is somehow in some people’s minds the cosmic one and only most smartest, most powerful, all-knowing master of the entire universe…and beyond and even beyond that and even beyond that, which is irrefutably proven to be a delusional thinking pattern and pretend world, mythmaking, see also https://unpleasant.ffrf.org/ and previous post “Yahweh-Jehovah Relocates From Mesopotamia“.
There’s a wise old saying that sums it up plainly…fiction abstract concepts theological fables and esoteric crypto-mystical kabbalistic apocalyptic blood magic cults are like a horse…if it looks like a horse, sounds like a horse, walks like a horse and talks like a horse, then you can be sure it’s probably a horse.

…then we also have Paul’s conflict and acrimony with the Jerusalem sect 12 politburo founding members (whom he calls “the 12”, aka the 12 super-apostles to later fans of the gospels-novels who just happen to immediately disappear and dissolve into space and time leaving no evidences or accomplishments behind or even enter the historical record anywhere at anytime) and especially the written admittance by Paul of direct conflict with Peter, and James (aka the Lord’s brother, real or figurative it’s not clearly defined or known and the majority of scholars lean more towards figurative “sectarian brother” because Paul knows nothing about any physical earthly Jesus birth, life or earthly events) and his letters text material where even the Paul character himself writes that James and the Jerusalem 12 were “false brothers” and sending spies to keep tabs on his foreign preaching travels (he also states in 2 Corinthians that his god…”has given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me”, yep Paul admits that his god is sending satan to torment him, and he also informs his readers that after praying his god still refused 3 times to stop it or take it away, pfff f**ked up in the head lunatic much???), his new arriving from outer space skylord zombifications mission, donations coins gathering and other dealings (almost like the Jim Bakker-Jerry Falwell PTL fight as an analogy), then the dark underworld conspiring events we read in the stories take on an even more ill-omened wretched sinister aura, yet where did all the intended for the Jerusalem sect founders (“the 12”) donation gift of Paul’s many collected shekels funds suddenly disappear to anyway?, all those many collected shekels from over the years suddenly disappeared without a trace just like the so-called Jerusalem “the 12” themselves also suddenly disappeared and are not heard from anywhere in any historical record anywhere, it seems the shekels donations funds and the so-called apostles just poof vanish from history (just how many shekels from his many years of travelling and getting donations in foreign lands is unknown, perhaps a fortune, especially with the coins being donated in Roman empire coins currency and so after conversion meaning even many more shekels, surely a fortune of shekels)….however some biblical theorists have put forth evidences that the shekels treasure was either immediately safely buried but soon afterwards was stolen by the risen zombies who were previously seen by many and surely probably still alive in Jerusalem at the time…or that the shekels treasure was eventually used by later dispersed minions of the sect to employ foreign writers who were already familiar with the Homeric sagas, various mystery religions and already known locally popular ghost stories to dream up and gradually write various new “anonymous” hocus pocus magical superhero origins gospels novels for the sect, and in the process invent a new contradictory Paul character in the Acts narrative to whitewash the scandalous sectarian subterfuge)…

Yep, “Fake News” is a “thing” that has been going on for thousands and thousands of years. Dying and rising saviours and demigods were already popular elsewhere first, such as the Buddha as one very well-known example, and especially popular already in the area ala Hercules, Perseus, Ion, Asclepius, Dionysus, Helen, Asherah, Sennacherib, Zoroaster, Zalmoxis, Alexander the Great, the Ptolemies, Caesar Augustus, Plato, Romulus, Remus and many others, and in numerous cases they often include conceptions by miraculous circumstances and being virgin-born, basically it’s just slinging the same ol’ hash mythemes and no evidences fake news stories and then just shuffling the furniture around, not original at all.

…The reader can let those very odd facts sink in for a minute, because what we clearly see going on is just the same ol’ “damage control propaganda” modus operandi being devised and fabricated after the fact failure disaster of the cult, not unlike many other failed doomsday cults and sects before and later through the centuries and even up to today…ala Millerites, Bible Student movement, Jehovah’s Witnesses’ and other sects, gurus and scamvangelist groups floating around, but in retrospect and truthfully the main point is that the death knell of the entire Jerusalem-based dark underworld secret blood magic mind control doomsday death cult had then factually already happened almost 2,000 years ago, and so everything written and claimed afterwards by the various anonymous purveyors with diseased minds and obviously under delusional self-hypnosis psychosis fixations then just further invented and added more mutating fictions-theologies and a lot more cryptic mystical abstract concepts, cherry picked mental gymnastics fabulism and especially various unheard of new hocus pocus magical sorcery exploits, invented contradictory genealogies, ufo-stars, travelling magi priests-astrologers etc..etc..etc.

The so-called “Abrahamic Trinity” schizophrenic menagerie and Yahwehism-Jehovahism Magical Carnival of Pretend, because it’s basically the same multiple personality tribal deity making 3 contradictory religions which is a delusional circus and probably one of the most absurd invented bullshitism “things” on the planet (well technically quite a few more than just 3 actually but it’s all still from the same original bullshitism source just different piles, with some personally shuffled around and tweaked characters and ideas like rearranging furniture in your living room to just how you want it, which if the reader wants to believe the ridiculous Abraham character fable story narrative or has no clue…..he was supposed to be an earlier rich wandering traveling many camels, tents and slaves owning Babylonian magus sorcerer guru from Ur of the Chaldeans/Mesopotamia (i.e. Iraq), who absurdly according to many biblical fan fiction apologists is even supposed to be the great great great great great etc grandfather of the Jesus character, because the master of the cosmos decided one day to just appear as a voice in the head of this one guy, just him and nobody else on the entire spinning dirtball in space planet for some reason (sort of just like Paul in a way, and because the master of the cosmos only hangs around a small part of the Middle East and floats around only there because it’s not interested or doesn’t even know about the rest of the planet I suppose), and then it makes a bunch of prophetic promises to just him that his descendants will own and rule most of the Middle East and tells Abraham how to burn and sacrifice blemish-free animals for desert blood magic rituals etc, and he lived while Noah was still alive (that guy in the story who brought 7 pairs of every animal on the planet and dinosaurs on a boat he and 3 other guys made) and he had a super sexy over 90 year old desert babe wife that an Egyptian pharaoh and Canaanite king were lustfully head over heels for to include in their wives harems and so Abraham sells her and a bunch of other invented rubbish stuff, I mention more about this superhero character at my first post “National Security Alert: Foreign Telescamvangelists, Cults. Sects“).

Paul character during his purported “visions”, hallucinations/voices in his head and psychosis mental breaks from reality that he alludes to purportedly, instead mostly writes about mutinous ‘angelic’ or ‘daemonian’ beings and agencies who have kingdoms and reign over the earth and he calls them Archons who have thrones, kingdoms and powers in the “High Places” (among the various heavenly layers of the nebulous cosmos) and that they are the gods of the nations and the earth, and that these mutinous angels are the ones who executed the “Christ” character somewhere in the cosmos, he doesn’t even mention any Romans crucifying anyone or it even taking place on earth, instead it’s the cosmic angelic Archons who did it…in “outer space”…(sounds like a good DC and Marvel Universe movie plot…However many scholars are of the opinion that the most wise serpent in the Garden of Eden could in fact be one of these gods or mutinous angels who attempted to only free mankind from the nefarious vile cosmocrat and from perpetual mind control servitude, because they weren’t created immortal to begin with and were never even told about the “Tree of Life”)…

The alleged Paul character who was the very 1st writing so-called Christian decades and a lifetime before the later anonymous gospels-novels stories were starting to be invented (seen above doing one of his famous speeches about lamps, lost coins or slaves or other stuff that even his own disciples had no clue what he was talking about), however so-called Paul didn’t even know about and never wrote about any actual physical Jesus character that was actually literally born, living and walking around on earth killing trees, making deals with demons and demon-possessed swine and making shiny new coins appear in fish mouths or dying on earth, instead Paul’s Jesus was a celestial skylord in outer space being who in Paul’s lifetime was going to make Paul and other immortal fresh zombies in new genderless spacesuit bodies float like balloons up, up, up, and away to the clouds before their Jesus skylord zaps and melts the nations and then sets up a worldwide theocratic blood magic kingdom temple-state empire run by priests in Jerusalem and then eternal trumpets and choirs and oil lamps and stuff like that.

…and we know Paul’s text excerpts are actually from many unknown authors not just one (aka “Pauline letters”), later various characters were simply “inserted” into real historical times and places and names were only “applied” to the texts as being the authors (We have no clue who wrote it because they’re anonymous writers, including “patchwork” written material thrown in from different unknown sources, that’s the way all man-made religions operate since people learned how to write, it’s always a changing, inventing, editing, mutating work in progress), invented histories and events were then written up “inserting” Paul into the times and events of the so-called disciples narrative in the story (just like in the average fiction novel, or Prometheus, Orpheus, Perseus, Hercules etc), and inserted quite poorly as the numerous remaining contradictions and erroneous information clearly shows we are dealing with fiction, then slowly the phantasm was now becoming an actual real person who was born, spoke and lived in the real world who could do magic shows against demons, make fig trees die instantly and even make thousands of pigs jump off cliffs to drown (Fabricating people, places and events just as the Old Testament writers did for centuries before, and Muslim writers afterwards). Interestingly, evidences and even Christian tradition claims Arianism was the dominant religion at the time of the First Council of Nicaea in 325 CE before being mysteriously “outvoted” by some newly appeared theological politburo “claiming” divine right, yet Origen, Eusebius and even Emperor Constantine and his family were of the Arianism Christian faith, which still continued for over a century, Emperor Valens was also up to 378 CE.

“You get a vision, and you get a vision, and hey you there you get a vision too! Everybody gets a vision!” A scene portraying the ancient Oracle at Delphi where advice from Apollo was given from visions, as explained below so-called “visions” were already a popular “thing” among many pagan religions in the ancient world long before any purported Paul came along to invent and spread his abstract concepts outer space-based Christianity theologies and failed apocalypses, the Oracle at Delphi even has an estimated history from circa. 1400 BCE and that’s just one of many visions examples. Even up to today many telescamvangelists repeatedly have visions with secret heavenly information given about needing to buy a new jet plane, which mansion or cakes to buy or how many millions of shekels they have to get that month or quarter for the lord and the lord’s temple coffers glory, so including the visions happening in many other world religions and experienced by many other people that then means “visions” are even still “a thing” these days also, ipso facto.

Another interesting thing to take into account about so-called Paul, (the very first purported “Christian” writer and proselytizer decades before any later anonymous gospels novels were devised over the next century), and since on the topic of his purported so-called “visions” and secret messages put into his brains from outer space, it’s a funny thing about “visions” (and “ghosts” which go along with visions many times and are at times even the same thing), as Dr. Dennis MacDonald points out and reminds (and who also shows the obvious parallels proving that much of New Testament and other early Christian narratives fables greatly imitate not only OT but also Homeric sagas and the works of Classical Greek literature because they were practically biblical to Greek writers which is precisely what the anonymous gospels novels writers were)….it’s mostly about psychology and even a form of self-hypnosis, although in Paul’s case a weird strange self-hypnosis not to better himself or induce relaxation, concentration and awareness, but instead to induce a belief-psychosis fixation that what he was pretending in his mind was real because he so badly wants it to be so, such as his impending apocalypse and transforming immortal genderless spacesuit body zombifications happening very soon in his lifetime etc (i.e. – a fabricated contradictory “Pretend World” in his mind in this case being passed off as or declared to be a “Real World” in the “Real Cosmos” when in fact it’s a completely imaginary universe existence only in his mind). That being also that Paul and his “personal visions” were really nothing special or uncommon at all because visions were actually very common at the time and for quite a long time before him. Because people were having alleged religious “visions” for centuries and even thousands of years before Paul started writing about his “personal visions”…such as the ancient priests and priestesses of Sumeria, Mesopotamia, Babylonia, Zoroastrian, Egyptian, Akkadian, Assyrian, various Canaanite and other religion’s priests were likewise experiencing visions regularly, and many other more contemporaneous pagan mystery religions experienced visions of their resurrected saviors, gods, goddesses and superheroes also…Mithras, Hercules, Zalmoxis, Tammuz, Astarte, Inanna/Ishtar, Zeus, Osiris, Apollo, Dionysus, Romulus, the ancient Greeks and Romans and many more to name just a few, they all had visions because having visions was a thing, and that’s not even getting into Hindu or Buddhist and other Asian and indigenous religious “visions” which are also much older. How even today people have visions in many religions around the world and cases of many people even having non-religious visions of others such as Elvis, Jim Morrison, Marilyn Monroe, Jean Harlow, Napoleon, Mozart, Beethoven, Homer, Caesar, Attila the Hun, Vlad Tepes Dracula, Croatian King Peter Krešimir IV (including the Croatian Royal Pentagram I use as my favicon) and other former Kings and Queens and emperors and many other actual real historical people that existed to name just a few examples (as well as deceased family members or friends of course, there’s lots and lots and lots of those visions examples also). Which means the supposed Paul character and his purported “visions”, which turned out to be contradictory wrong information and so failed visions anyway, is really nothing special because religious visions were actually already very common long before any Paul started writing if he even actually existed as claimed (as well as the ghosts and ghost stories, ghost stories were also very popular in the ancient world and a thing too). And when you factor in that the decades later devised anonymous gospels novels written in the 2nd century long after Paul would have died, were greatly influenced by Homeric sagas and based on a number of older previous pagan mystery religions resurrecting savior-superhero cults and sects beliefs, and how even the supposed Paul himself also greatly imitates previous visions and ghosts legends narratives, then that just makes Paul and his savior-god copycats of older pagan religions legends, narratives and beliefs and so actually quite unoriginal and ho-hum just like any modern day telescamvangelist vision chicanery babbling. Today of course people like a Paul would be given various colored candy pills and medications in a hospital to help them get back to reality and sanity again from his floating zombies bodies apocalypse obsessions and contradictory alternate reality nonsensical abstract concepts preaching fixations. The main point being though that there is then really no justifiable reason to give any purported Paul visions stories and conceptualized ideas any more importance or credibility than any of the numerous other religious and non-religious visions that have taken place since long before him, after him and that are still taking place around the world today, Paul is just one puny vision-fish in a big size of the planet lake of many vision-fishes basically, and so factually just another pathologically obsessed charlatan and Yahwehism-Jehovahism con artist religious nut, which are also a thing).

As briefly mentioned earlier, the same very problematic and contradictory quotes, events and hocus pocus continues right through to the culminating ending of each of the anonymous gospels-novels. Being very different from each other with very different magical events, things said and done and characters/beings involved, including darkness because of an eclipse at noon for 3 hours (during a full moon which is physically impossible) across the world (impossible again) that should have been noticed and written about by at least someone somewhere from the time, as well as simultaneous powerful earthquake, significant Jerusalem temple damage and especially roving bands of many fresh from the grave zombies strolling through the city seen by many, but absolutely nobody from the time noticed these awesome magical things happening. Of course the pinnacle empty tomb finale scene stories are also vastly different and even on different days…from women just seeing a guy in the tomb with the stone already moved and then running away saying nothing to anyone and end of the story folks…to different women seeing the stone already moved but 2 guys are sitting and glowing in the tomb instead…to different women yet again but they see a magical outer space guy whoosh down bright like lightning and he causes an earthquake, then he zaps the Roman guards unconscious, and then he personally rolls back the stone himself and then sits on it chilling out…to lastly just 1 woman seeing the empty tomb but there being absolutely nobody in it at all, not even a pigeon or anything. Yep it’s mythomania and contradictions problems galore from birth beginnings straight through to the magical hocus pocus finale endings of the novels (and the Paul character doesn’t know or mention any of the earthly stuff happening in his letters anyway, none of it, which if he was an actual earthly person doing stuff on earth sure is problematic and very, very, very, very weird). It’s proven and very apparent then that Yahwehism-Jehovahism version 2.0 is also bullshitism fictions. #gospeltruth #gospeltruth #gospeltruth #gospetruth.

The notion that the four “gospels that made the cut” to be included in the official New Testament were written by men named Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John does not go back to early Christian times. The titles “According to Matthew,” etc., were not added until late in the second century. Thus, although Papias ca. 140 CE (‘Common Era’) says he knows all the gospels but has only heard of Matthew and Mark (but being another supreme fabulist he also supposedly knows that Judas swelled up so abnormally large that he could not even walk through narrow streets anymore (just like the Kool-Aid Man basically), his eyes puffed swollen shut, his genitals enlarged and filled with pus and worms when he had to urinate and that death came to him “in his own land” which still stinks so badly that no one can pass through there without holding their nose even up to today, wow now that’s dang darn interesting…lol, Papias is also an important early source on Christian oral tradition and especially on the origins of the canonical gospels novels, so no made up rubbish or fiction there instead it’s super-true), Justin Martyr (ca. 150 CE) knows of none of the four supposed authors (he refers only to excerpts of what he calls “Memoirs of the Apostles”, which could be any written material he came across and sounds very similar to Xenophon’s “Memoirs of Socrates”, as he was very acquainted with Socratic tradition, Xenophon and Plato’s “Socratic Dialogues” this is hardly surprising).

If you want to have a really truthful applicable book title then “Book of Lies” is really and factually a very correct and fitting title, and the description by some deceiving charlatans of it even being perfect “inerrant” is proven to be absurdly ridiculous, lies and comical bullshitism. Because right from the beginning first book of genesis and onward a reader is immediately having their brain inundated by reading about primitive and pretend world fables and fictions and magical thinking with fake fictitious characters and events, forgeries, plagiarisms, pseudepigrapha, impossible fables claims, wrong and senseless cosmological and geoscientific information, wrongly claimed information vis a vis known real proven historical record information, natural world nonsensical and impossible hocus pocus shows and displays, magical fruits, including blood magic as being part of natural science of the planet, using blood sorcery and animal sacrifices as a cure for diseases, ignorance of human anatomy and psychology, ignorance of basic math and pathology/diseases, nonsensical illogical absurd narratives, time travel of fictional celestial and chthonic beings, invented genealogies, talking animals, mutating abstract concepts and beliefs theologies, ultra-superstitious and ultra-ethnocentric thinking and behaviorisms, religious syncretism from other religions and cultural diffusion from other cultures portrayed as being original and divine, outer space beings and creatures, zombification powers, failed prophecies including opposite verified results of prophecies happening instead, mythomanias used as a substitution for known history and geography, and numerous contradictions all of which are actually just other alternate ways of saying “lies”, aka “bullshitism” in the colloquial vernacular (because the master of all the galaxies and cosmos and everything in it as presented in the texts, yet it can’t make a box, a boat or even one simple puny building…it can make all things humans can’t make we are told but it just is unable to and “can’t’ make things that humans “can” make, also because the fictional Abraham character is also responsible for various different theologically opposed religions and over time mutated into countless other different cults and sects and theological-superstitions behaviorisms beliefs at odds with one another and so the Yahweh-Jehovah god actually can’t get anything right and is confused with no legitimacy…unless “inerrant” is actually a metaphor or allegory which means full of errors, see telescamvangelist videos below for just a few examples of some of the absolute verminous supremos of bullshitism).

It is only in 180 CE, with Irenæus of Lyons, that we are told who wrote the four “canonical” gospels and discover that there are exactly four of them because there are four quarters of the earth, four universal winds and because the so-called “Church Fathers” also identified the four gospel writers with the ridiculous absurd four living beings or beasts named in Revelation 4:6, 7; cf. Ezekiel 1:10—the lion was Mark, the ox was Luke, the flying eagle was John and the the creature with the face of a man was Matthew, this symbolic identification is made in both Christian literature and art through the centuries and is basically just more fabulist mutating hocus pocus inventions. Thus, unless one supposes the argument of Irenæus to be other than ridiculous, we come to the conclusion that the gospels are of unknown origin and authorship, and there is no good reason to suppose they are eyewitness accounts of a Jesus character. It could just as easily have been referring to the wonders of Dionysus turning water into wine, or to the healings of Asclepius etc.

Yahweh-Jehovah God’s personal handpicked prophet and apostle-witch thinks the “Great Divine Cosmic Butler” and “Personal Banker Genie Deity” and its bibles manual are mostly about “miracle spring water” and faith shekels seeds for “miracle oil”, when it’s all really mostly about just primitive blood magic sorcery, Mesopotamian legends, Zoroastrianism, primitive Levantine tribal religious-cultural syncretism and diffusion, necromancy magic incantations, failed apocalyptic predictions, slavery, grooming and fashion laws, yeast-free breads and of course sacrificed blemish-free goats and pigeons.

Only in the late 4th century did the newly devised Nicene Creed start to slowly gain ground and become “official” for the unknowing peasants and masses…importantly enforced with state backing (actually it was at the first Council of Nicaea that all the oldest original very first Christianities ceased to exist [and there were quite a number of them floating around with various differences, concepts and beliefs and each one claiming to be the right way], and so a new monster was born so to speak, which would eventually and even already soon after did give birth to and beget further mutating monsters and “creations”), but not everywhere and many churches did not agree so it was then “enforced with state backing”, many times brutally.

A portrayal of the popular climactic scene from the anonymously written Matthew gospel novel where many recently risen from their graves zombies rose and walked around the city “seen by many”, just one of numerous examples of further mutating, changed, edited and added material not found in the original 1st anonymous “Mark” gospel novel, and strangely all of them also not being known about by the alleged Paul character who instead only knew of a celestial outer space skylord Jesus being who never at anytime he described as ever even being physically born, living, doing magic, walking around doing stuff or even being on earth at anytime, btw the zombies are never mentioned again anywhere ever again by anybody and nobody knows what happened to them, and it’s still one of the greatest mysteries of the world being studied and on the news everywhere even today.

However what the many earliest texts from the 1st century included and what they exactly believed (i.e. – the actual very first so-called “Christians”, although we don’t really know what they even called themselves or their religion because of the numerous cults and sects to be found at the time) before being edited and/or reworked or outright burned in later centuries, we may perhaps never fully know, yet we do know enough that many of them clearly believed in a “phantasm” Jesus-ish character (who only received the name Jesus later after already dead interestingly), but that he wasn’t ever even literally born and that a battle of kingdoms took place in the cosmos not on earth. These are the earliest so-called “Christians” and Christian texts (or whatever they called themselves as that term is a much later construct, it’s a title not a name)…if they were alive to read today’s various bibles and watch televangelist shows they most assuredly would not even recognize what was being preached, the vast majority of the later added fables, doctrines, legends and characters and nonsense shticks, probably even that people were all crazy for believing such invented nonsense drivel.

♫♪♪♬…Authority and Zoroastrian inspired Yahwehism-Jehovahism blood magic sorcery hocus pocus mind control is truth..♪♩♫..Truth is not authority..♬..Haaaalleluuuujaaaah to the great outer space Yom Kippur goat skylord and mind control guru-ghost being…♫ ♩♩♫…
Awaiting the day of immortal zombification as promised by some guy Paul and guaranteed by his celestial Yom Kippur goat skylord and then zap and melt the nations for the new Jerusalem temple world HQ theocratic kingdom..oh wait it was supposed to have happened about 2,000 years ago guaranteed, nevermind.
According to the biblical narrative texts, John the baptist wore camel hair, had unkempt hair and beard looking like a disheveled wildman, he lived in the wilderness away from civilization boldly yelling at people all sorts of crazy ideas, snacked on wild honey from rock crevices, tree sap and ate locusts for food…yum, today a person like this would be forced to a mental hospital to take medications and learn to bathe and eat regularly, strangely though the Jesus character is quoted as saying “I tell you, among those born of women none is greater than John”. Really? now that’s verily very interesting and ridiculously absurd, greatest man ever born you say? Pfff that seems very dubious and highly unlikely bullshitism. Tough luck Aristotle, Heraclitus, and Lucretius et al (and even the Moses and Abraham characters etc). According to the biblical stories then it’s really no big surprise why they both had the same enemies who thought of them both as troublemaking crazy lunatics. (Hey you, spit those locusts out of your mouth and have some fresh BBQed porkchops and real food you stupid jerk! and put on some real clothes too it’s not caveman days anymore!). Btw, contrary to most televangelist’s as usual erroneous perceptions and fabrications, the bugs eating and camels furs wearing John the baptizer is not some original new guy on the scene with new heavenly revealed “water magic” secrets and rituals, instead he’s just slinging the same ol’ hash that many other pagan religions had been doing already for thousands of years before him so it’s no new holy concept magical tradition. Baptism by water was a very, very old pagan rite, being practiced already by the followers of Zoroaster, by the ancient Chaldeans of Babylonia, by the Romans, the Greeks, the ancient Egyptians, as well as a number of European pagan tribal religions and even known to have been a common water immersion purification rite among various Indigenous Native American religions, it was also in vogue among the ancient Hindus at a still earlier date, so it was a “water magic” ritual already known and used by “pagans” for over 3,000 years previously, yep just slinging the same ol’ hash and nothing new. Also, so let me get this straight…so according to the story many, many thousands of people from far and wide come to him for a water magic ritual/ baptism and he’s become extremely well known and even very famous across the lands, then he acknowledges a new arriving Jesus character as the messiah and the promised savior of the Jews and so probably the most important Jewish person since Moses but actually even more important, (although the Paul writer knows nothing about all this stuff or even about any earthly events btw), but then he just keeps on doing his arrived doomsday burnings and water magic shtick having his own sectarian disciples and cult movement like nothing even happened. He never joins Jesus, doesn’t follow or help him, never speaks about him or even mentions him, but also THEY NEVER EVEN BUMP INTO EACH OTHER EVER AGAIN, EVER. Not even once do they cross paths again..ever, but one of the gospels-novels even has them being miraculous relatives from the start (Luke gospel-novel, in original Mark gospel-novel he’s a stranger never heard of or seen before). Also not long after John gets into big trouble with the authorities, with the Pharisees, Sadducees but especially mainly with the reigning Jewish ruler Herod Antipas, why?…because John gets all righteous uppity and starts causing big trouble badmouthing Herod Antipas among the people for being divorced and remarrying (very powerful and not exactly a guy you want to mess with Herod Antipas btw, basically flinging camel dung at his face looking for big time trouble and a big time headache). Yep, he forgets all about the centuries long-awaited Jesus the Jewish messiah the supposed son of their god and master of their universe (according to the story narrative), and instead he becomes all obsessed and fixated sticking his nose in Herod’s bed basically, and speaking out not against any murders or orgies or swine sacrifices going on with Herod but instead being vehemently against just only his marriage after being divorced, Herod wasn’t going around sacrificing babies or worshipping a cow, he didn’t get a 700th wife like king Solomon, he didn’t have multiple wives and concubines and get married women pregnant and then nefariously trick and kill her husband like king David, he was marrying according to local Jewish customs with a local Jew and not marrying some foreign Egyptian, Roman, Persian or Greek or other Pagan Non-Jew etc, he wasn’t opening a new foreign temple and sacrificing to Hercules, Aphrodite or Jupiter or Apollo or Asclepius or Zalmoxis or Mithras etc, just only for that (Hey Herod and everyone! I’m John directly arrived from the wilderness, the “Son of Yahweh” maker of our universe is walking around in your backyard Herod to defeat the Romans and install the kingdom but you got remarried after a divorce dagnabit darn holy dang I tell you!!!), or how about just telling any people anywhere?…”Oh hey! Guess what!? Our many centuries long-awaited messiah is finally here! He’s here right now on his way to Jerusalem people! He was at the river just yesterday, a magical pigeon landed on him and I was chatting with him for a whole 4 minutes, he’s really here for real Glo-Ry!”…Pfff not a peep to anybody some prophet. It’s like a ridiculous absurd kitsch comedy, according to the narrative he was even born for this specific reason in the first place to specifically introduce and hail the Jewish messiah and his kingdom on earth, but instead he then disappears entirely and the next time he’s mentioned he’s not hailing any new messiah superhero and his new kingdom or preaching his actual arrival…nope, he instead has a nitpicking bee in his bonnet causing trouble and angry that his king got married, THAT’S his major malfunction problem and important topic to preach about???!!! THAT’S what he decides to risk his life over of all things going on around him???!!! (the many centuries long-awaited messiah savior of the Jews is here right now, but this ruler is darn dang getting married, oh that’s it I can’t let this event happen without saying a word or two dagnabit I tell you!), he doesn’t even have anything to say about the Romans who were even ultimately in charge over the Jews, he’s a totally vacuous stooge and imbecile joke this John the camel fur water magic guy from the wilderness (and strangely again, the wife Herod divorced was Phasaelis who was actually an Arab being a daughter of a king of the Nabataeans, to take the new wife Herodias who was actually ethnically Jewish, so you would think “John” would be supportive of that since he’s such a by the book holy something or whatever, did John eat a few too many expired locusts?). Needless to say all these purported claimed events are very strange, irrational and absurd, in the stories they strangely never crossed paths or bumped into each other ever again which is very strange, however according to the stories John the baptizer and the Jesus character did both get executed around the same time by their own legitimate authorities charges for being religious nuts troublemakers and fanatical cultic gurus, which was not strange and actually very common at the time, it was a thing.

Inconvenient fact: evidence of early Christian communities is extremely scanty, the new appearing versions of Christian cults remained a small minority among many cults and religions until well after one particular faction formed a political alliance with the State, i.e. – Constantine. The following new theologies and especially the newly concocted Nicene Creed was very unpopular for centuries afterwards with many breakaway new churches and churches that never accepted the new theologies in the first place, and so then persecution was necessary to impose its will, basically the former persecuted now became the new official state persecutors. (Laughably lots of people and especially televangelists even think that only the KJV bible is the true “god-approved” bible version, which would then mean it took the master of the universe only 1,600 years after the alleged narrative fables began to finally get a bunch of yokels, synods, votes, bannings, excommunications, editings, translations, new texts, fragments patchworking, reworkings, book burnings and many meetings to finally get it right and so “Christianity” is actually then really only 400 years old, but it’s still full of contradictions, errors absurdity and nonsense and so it’s not really that impressive actually. And people think “Fake News” is just a recent modern day phenomena?).

Hell and the Abyss tours have more bizarro-characters and hocus pocus going on than even Disneyland, Magic Kingdom and Jurassic Park combined (“Look! It’s the Beast from the sea rising out of the Abyss!…and the Abaddon archangel with the keys to the Abyss who’s leader of the human-headed golden-crowned locusts who sound like horses with stinging scorpion tails coming out of the sulfur furnace smoke!”…”and look there! it’s the Egyptian Lake of Fire! Coool Neato-Wow! Can I have a souvenir T-shirt?!”).

And even just the less well-known case of Marcion (among many, many cases of early 1st and 2nd century intrigue, debates, arguments, disagreements, censures and heresy excommunications), which is something probably many have absolutely no clue about because it’s been censored and hushed-up for many centuries (among many other things), it’s very interesting though even from just the historical perspective for history buffs even if not interested in any of the religious views or beliefs, interesting for a number of very intriguing and important reasons that would probably piss of many televangelists especially. (Get ready to be mind blown so you might want to sit down and make some snacks and adult beverages first, I recommend a Martini or maybe a Jager Bomb, you can even order a few gallons from Jim Bakker’s creamy potato soup bucket first if you want I don’t care)…

You mean Marcion and the Phantasm-Jesus was the very first New Testament and very first written gospel? And he even wrote the first original Gospel of Luke before it was changed and added onto with more fictions and contradictory fabrications aka Luke-Acts? Whoa!…

Because the early so-called “church father” Marcion was actually onto a good idea by finally being the very first person to decide to actually write things down in the late 1st to early 2nd century as a permanent record that people could actually read, (and according to his sources, which were the earliest known sources available at the time because the later 4 gospels weren’t even thought of to be written yet…Marcion wrote that Jesus started a completely brand new religion that wasn’t even connected to the Old Testament and its always jealous, complaining, repenting, genocidal, wrathful absurd infantile, malevolent, infanticidal, smiting, laws and regulations giving and blood magic sacrifices demanding Yahweh-Jehovah-god (aka “God” to some people for some weird reason). Marcion instead denied Jesus’ actual physical and bodily birth, death, and resurrection altogether by explaining that according to his information and sources (again the oldest sources known up to then btw, and there were many other groups, churches and sects who likewise believed similar things at the time, we don’t really even know what the earliest first believers believed or why), Marcion insisted that Jesus was actually an incarnated phantom from somewhere beyond with an imitation material body, as in he wasn’t even born on earth but instead came down as a phantom and then just took on a bodily form, (a viewpoint also shared by a number of the early Christian groups btw, Marcion was just most singled out by competing so-called “Church Fathers” cults leaders because of his growing presence and popularity), but his writings pissed off some others who didn’t agree and who had their own ideas and agendas, so then they decided to write stuff down also to answer back as a retort which ironically eventually became the early New Testament, so you see Marcion actually started the whole idea of writing the New Testament thing, as in the very first New Testament gospels writings and because of this he’s even sometimes also called the Father of the New Testament. Some of Marcion’s views were similar to the teachings of Cerinthus (50-100 CE) who likewise believed that the lesser “Demiurge” god created the world not the unknown god of Jesus, but he additionally assured that Jesus was not supernaturally born of a virgin, but was instead just a mere man, the biological son of Mary and Joseph, and that the Christ (anointing) descended upon Jesus only at baptism but it abandoned him at the crucifixion and he then simply died, died just as thousands of others were crucified and died. Cerinthus claimed that he received angelic inspiration (“Holy Vision”?) assuring him that was the truth of events (and you can’t deny angelic holy visions sent by god can you? It worked for Paul, and countless others before and after, so Cerinthus could very well have the real “gospel truth”). Interestingly, there are even claims by groups already from those early centuries that Cerinthus was the actual true author of the Gospel of John and Book of Revelation, reason being because even today the Gospel of John in numerous obvious and contradictory ways can rightfully be regarded as the opposite of the other 3 gospels and it largely denigrates them. The John gospel novel can be correctly described even as an “Anti-Synoptic Gnostic Gospel” which adapted Philo’s description of the centuries older pagan philosophical “Logos” concept (first mentioned and written about by Heraclitus in circa.  535-475 BCE), because of the vast differences and because it was written considerably after the other 3 gospels and their sources/anonymous authors it can even more accurately and correctly be described and regarded as a truly Gnostic inspired “Gospel of Satan” or more accurately an “Anti-Synoptic Satanic Gospel”, although Gnosticism teachings and theological ideas are found in the Synoptic Gospels also but just not to the high degree of the later anonymous so-called John gospel texts (To put it colloquially, the authors of Mathew didn’t like what was in the written text of Mark and so added plenty of stuff and various new stories and various new concepts and meanings, then the writers of Luke didn’t like what was written in either of them all that much and so started adding lots more stuff and ideas and changing meanings, but then lastly the authors of John (yes “authors” because it repeatedly states “we”)…basically said “F**k all 3 of you you’re all wrong, I (we) have the real deal gossip rumours news scoops story and know what went down and I’m gonna write the real story” and so then wrote opposite things from all 3 of them and adding more different theological meanings, abstract concepts, new miracles and stories, with his new theologies and ideas he actually comes across sounding more like the “Paul” character than any of the other gospels-novels writers). However importantly not to be confused with the Lucifer/Luciferian “Light-Bringer/Bringer of Light” (because Lucifer is just the ancient Roman Latin name for the planet Venus) or associated with the plural “Elohim” Gods who created the world and everything in it, but rather more in line as the Hebrew Yahweh-Jehovah God’s “Diabolus-slanderer” character (the one that throws libelous claims at another, i.e. – Diabolus which became Devil) who is similar to the Satan Angel (i.e. – “a satan” or “the satan” that did or said such and such) much like the one that blocks and “accuses” Balaam while saving his talking donkey from being beaten to death, who himself even states that he was “sent to come down” to be a Satan to Balaam.

“If we are to take the biblical Yahwist god at nominal face value exactly as it is presented in these written and scribbled texts, and not as promoted by their flummoxed apologetic acolytes with their ad hoc inventions and mental acrobatics concoctions, then it is clearly the most vile, repulsive and absurdly contradictory being ever dreamed up. Because we have plentiful amounts of textual evidences that it is pathetically puny, mentally defective, greatly deficient in common sense and with vastly underdeveloped knowledge, astonishingly erratic, morally reprehensible, immeasurably ignorant and thus naturally irrelevant for any thinking person to even attempt to ponder, much less explain or make fanciful excuses for. Yet even those are not sufficient enough excuses for it to exist, because it is also ultimately directly responsible for the most heinous wicked crimes, barbarous calamities and obscene grotesqueries imaginable, and as a bizarre paradox they are considered its marvelous handiwork to which glorifying adoration should and must be made, so it is said…(I have also been made privy to by some fabulists in Abrahamic academic apologist’s circles, that it also has decided in his immense oscillating, injudicious and imprudent wisdom, to bless the planet with not just one absolute religion, but with at least 3 incongruous heretical failed religions to follow, my how majestic and magnanimous of him and blessed for us all)…

…Yet the atrocious lunacy does not stop there and is even worsened by the very primary reasons for the afflictions and threats having happened at all, for this alleged all-knowing most wise and most powerful architect sitting in its far-off unseen sky castle temple…it performs these deeds along with episodic browbeating discourses to only a select anonymous very few for the sole purposes of megalomaniacal self-fetishization and self-worship. Notwithstanding the various required superstitions, blood magic witchery and spellwork incantations, to make their presentation of absolutely no value and even more asinine..this Iron Age biblical master of the deserts, and perhaps a few nearby piles of craggy rocks, mounds and crevices, is shown to be a theological construct and on the whole a tribal absentee landlord who was largely mostly concerned with local real estate, blood, burnt animal sacrifices and love of self-exaltation, but is completely ineffectual. In the presented texts it is incontestably shown to be an alien, preposterous, contemptible, unknown, a jumble of confusion, primitive antiquated and obsolete deistic flotsam and jetsam, and still even today it remains as a backward unevolved self-idolator incapable of any sort of acumen or legitimacy whatsoever”.

Unknown 19th century philosopher historian
Allegedly knows the future of everything, everywhere at all times before it even happens (even way before it happens and even way long before that)…but gets…angry, smiteful, jealous, genocidal, infanticidal, vengeful, pestilential, malevolent, bloodthirsty ethnic cleanser, misogynistic, ultra extreme ethnocentric parochial, pyromaniacal, vaccicidal, filicidal, curse-hurling, cannibalistic, sadomasochistic, capriciously malevolent bully, control-freak terrorist, vindictive and merciless,,,when stuff happens. More details at https://unpleasant.ffrf.org/.

Abrahamic Religions God, aka “Yahweh-Jehovah”, aka “The Great Serpent-Maker” , “The Celestial Dichotomy Deity” & “The King of the Mesopotamian Garden”, according to his very own autobiography admits that “He Creates the Evil”.

A more precise literary accurate representation of the OT biblical Y-J god of the garden according to the very inspired words that he spoke and wrote in his very own inspired bible thus admitting his truths by his own handwritten words that he wrote.
When the God writes that he’s Satan in his very own book then he must know what he’s talking about, believe his very own written words people.
When going on numerous god-commanded massacres missions for Jesus’ dad to take their lands, you have to kill all the babies, children, pregnant women, young and old, and all the animals every single f***ing last one of them, it’s the best and only way don’t you think the “Serpent-Maker God” and “King of the Mesopotamian Garden” ought to know best.
♫♪♪♬…Gimme ♪ that ol’ ♬ time religion ♫ ♩♩♫…
♫♪♪♬…Gimme ♪ that ol’ ♬ time religion ♫ ♩♩♫…
♫♪♪♬…Gimme ♪ that ol’ ♬ time religion ♫ ♩♩♫…
Jesus’ father Yahweh-Jehovah made sure the soldiers got their dicks wet for glorious righteous hallelujah and Zion glory blessings, plus even get to BBQ some as a bonus aromatic blessing, the lord he is just so loving caring and a truly all-around swell god guy who’s perfect
…♫♪♪♬…Gimme ♪ that ol’ ♬ time religion ♫ ♩♩♫…
♫♪♪♬…Gimme ♪ that ol’ ♬ time religion ♫ ♩♩♫…
♫♪♪♬…Gimme ♪ that ol’ ♬ time religion ♫ ♩♩♫…
♫♪♪♬…Onward, Christian soldiers!
Marching as to war,
With the cross of Jesus
Going on before
Christ, the royal Master,
Leads against the foe;
Forward into battle,
See his banners go!…♫ ♩♩♫…
Why it waited so long to start over after such a long time and so many more victims makes absolutely no sense unless it’s dumb, when it could have started over soon after Adam and Eve, if you realize you screwed up a cake recipe by using salt instead of sugar, then why even continue mixing and pouring and baking it and putting it on plates and then decide “this cake tastes like manure I’m throwing it out and baking a fresh new cake”? That is absurdly dumb to wait so long, when it could have just started fresh with Adam and Eve’s grandchildren instead. But don’t forget though “God is Love” people, don’t forget he’s always been just love and only love all the time since forever because he’s all about love and loving everything and everyone…basically he’s actually really just a great big floating around the cosmos giant pink heart-shaped bubble floating around leaving rainbow colored love sparkles, cotton candy clouds and love chimes sounds everywhere he goes loving everyone (yep he loves everyone and I mean everyone, heck maybe even you), because he’s basically all full of heavenly marshmallows of love and just wants to hug you eternally filled with his magical love bubble chimes being all loved (and that’s also why sometimes he’s portrayed as a fuzzy furry rabbit giving out free chocolate eggs, gingerbread camels and candied peanuts to people all across the world, it’s true I read that somewhere or someone said something like that).
Which means that the biblical Yahweh-Jehovah god (aka “the Great Serpent-Maker” & “God of the Mesopotamian Garden”) cannot only give orders to slaughter babies and children, the old and young (and all the young sheep, cows, oxen, asses, goats, horses, camels etc, every single one of them for some obscure weird pointless reason), and he can even be satan and himself at the same time, but he also makes and sends evil spirits into people without any demon’s help at all (btw, the 10 deaths attributed to Satan are actually resulting from a test-bet that the floating in the sky Y-J petty miscreant deity initiated with his teammate errand boy Satan, so it’s actually “0 deaths”, see previous post excerpt for shocking detailed proof about those pointless snafus). #gospeltruth #gospeltruth #gospeltruth #gospeltruth.

However, since we know from Isaiah 45: 7 that the Hebrew Yahweh-Jehovah God is quoted saying “I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, AND I CREATE EVIL” which implies that God is the Devil (more accurately “the Diabolus-slanderer” and not the Elohim, or Lucifer either of course because the Hebrews never wrote in Latin or Greek), thus the Yahweh-Jehovah God is then denigrating the 3 Synoptic Gospels with the help of his anonymous authors/demons mainly because he is actually the Diabolus/Devil as per his own stated quote in the text and he cannot lie (Now I’m not saying I support Marcion or Marcionism or Cerenthus, Valentinus or Cerdo or any of the many similar earliest Christian teachers, sects and cults leaders or anybody or any belief or desert guru, I’m just saying that as far as we know history tells us that Marcion actually wrote/recorded the very first New Testament books and the very first known gospel from the earliest known sources, well before the later 4 gospels were started to be even thought of and written), and even more surprising probably to many is that Marcion’s gospel is literally the “very 1st Christian gospel ever written or known about…ever”, i.e. – No gospel is ever even mentioned by any of the so-called church fathers before the appearance of Marcion’s “gospel”. As in there wasn’t even any mentions of any gospels whatsoever written by anybody before Marcion did his writing because instead it was just lots of different fables, sources and different ideas and cults floating around, (well they’re all cults actually anyway), we know there were quite a number of different and competing so-called “gospels” in the early years and early 2nd century and each one different from each other in very important ways as well as each one claiming a direct linear connection to the character of a Jesus and his disciples-clique or even having no disciples and being only celestial never even being on earth ever (there are known to have been almost 100 different “Christian” groups and followers of a new “Jesus character based religion” but with very different teachings and beliefs from one another at that time in the Levant, but each one claiming to be the right and true way…pick a card…any card, talk amongst yourselves about that interesting one and the first official known Christian gospel before the later official 4 gospels inventions quandary).

Marcion was persecuted only because he pointed out the blatantly obvious dichotomy and contradictions that are irreconcilable between the main OT god and the new NT god which without a doubt proved they were in fact 2 different gods.

What was Marcion’s actual ultimate crime? Why was he so hated by the newly appearing religion in power aristocracy-politburo? so to speak, by the ones assuming control and declaring and defining dogmas and inventing histories and theologies?…Because he publicly exposed the OT Yahweh-Jehovah tribal deity for being the malevolent moral monster it claimed to be and he emphasized Jesus too much! He was also hated for disagreeing with their interpretation of certain OT passages as being allegorical, to which Marcion replied was nothing more than a feeble attempt to disguise and whitewash the primitive barbarities of their scriptures.

Has a warped obsession with penis foreskins, blood magic sacrifices, abomination seafood and pork chops, cotton-polyester blends, smitings and unblemished animals…thinks menstruation cooties, invisible voodoo curses, water and wind demons, talking snakes and magical fruit are actually a thing.

But soon afterwards Marcion was persecuted, got outvoted, called a heretic and then excommunicated by the newly appearing and growing Yahwehism-Jehovahism sectarian version church fathers politburo who usurped control (which was no surprise really, just as numerous sects already existed for centuries so heretics were all over the place also, and there was no defining what a real heretic was anyway because even the excommunicating cliques were being called heretics by the excommunicated heretics who felt they were right and the true church being persecuted), although there still were many Marcionite churches scattered around that taught his gospel for centuries afterwards before slowly disappearing and finally eliminated by the new consensus thought-police church fathers politburo, so his ideas are not some new Hollywood movie plot or recent New Age tin foil hat conspiracy movement, it was real and the very first Christian gospel and bible version recorded ipso facto. Many scholars even think that Luke was created by just adding anti-Marcionite passages to Marcion’s gospel, or that both Luke and Marcion’s gospel are edited versions of some other lost prior gospel, those who support this last view usually maintain that the Gospel of Marcion is then closer to the original than canonical Luke which was written later including fake Paul information, and we know this because of the remaining evidences of conversations and letters about Marcion that date from the time he lived). Excommunicating, censuring, banishing and condemning each other as heretics all over the place all the time, because they simply couldn’t agree on their versions of stories about the very basic fundamental beliefs “No this goes in, that has to go”…”No, it stays and you go because you are a blasphemy guru”….”No no no, it stays out and both of you are heretics and servants of Satan (who isn’t Lucifer (the ancient Roman name for the planet Venus) or the Devil (diabolus) because Hebrews never spoke or wrote Latin or Greek), but we’ll make some other things up first then have a vote, we will vote and add and take away, invent more and vote more until we have the “Word of God” etc and so on). They were having all kinds of councils, synods, votes, more councils and more banishments and more added fiction for the next council and meetings constantly and they still couldn’t agree, the snowball just kept growing bigger with more snow and even sand and pebbles in it. The most boring and dumb eternal arguments and votes ever. Did he or didn’t he exist and what was his name anyway?, was he a man, a demon or god or god-man or a phantasm? Just what the heck did he say anyway? Hey you there, do you guys or anybody there know what he said or did or if he existed? I think we need a big meeting and let’s have a vote! Hey you brother Copeland and Hinn verily tell us what he said (From the time he was claimed to have lived in the narrative novels and wowing and amazing many thousands with magical feats and even rising zombies afterwards, not even one writer, historian, philosopher, ruler, soldier, politician, rabbi or any person whatsoever made any mention of it, Philo of Alexandria the Hellenistic Jewish philosopher was even in Jerusalem for a while during the time period but seems to not be aware of anything unusual going on or noteworthy, it’s all just only…..crickets. Thankfully later plenty of pagan traditions and stuff was added, picking good important earlier pagan dates and customs for the holidays and celebrations, including ancient pagan Croatian customs such as the holiday trees, wreaths, painted eggs, mistletoe etc).

Besides the 1st Council of Nicaea in the 4th century, Eusebius was hugely responsible for fabricating and spreading the new religion text material, aka as the “Father of Church History” he was the 4th century “Christian historian”, bishop, exegete, and Christian polemicist (explainer/excuses-maker/editor in charge of theological mind control propaganda). The Council of Nicaea ordered by emperor Constantine, and the “writer” Eusebius, are both largely (but not solely) responsible for the bible versions used today, well most of them anyway, and in the process continued and expedited the hoped for obliteration of the very first and oldest original Christianities which used the oldest original oral traditions, sources and beliefs. Oh that good ol’ Eusebius and his fantasyland forged writing shenanigans and time warping history fabrication skills (aka “the Oral Roberts of the 4th Century”, “The Quickest Pen East of Tarsus”, “The Caesarea Maritima Hurricanea”, “The Lyrical Lightning from the Levant”, “The Kenneth Copeland of Byzantium”, “The Constantinople Cobra”, “The Master of Exegesis” etc). The guy who took on the role and responsibility for inventing/censuring/interpolating/recording the first 300 years of the new state backed religion, as well as inventing stories, people and martyrs out of thin air with no sources, was known for omitting and changing material as he saw fit, he was basically a lying fabulist and dishonest forging sectarian guru (If he was alive today he would be like a Kenneth Copeland, Peter Popoff, Morris Cerullo, Pat Robertson and Jerry Falwell combined with a little bit of Billy Graham all put together and that’s the gospel truth).

As for the findings and opinions of Marcion, many people today have come to the exact same conclusion just by reading the text, it’s that simple. For example according to Dan Barker who is a former Bible-Belt Pastor, and many, many, many scholars over the years and others, the OT god is correctly described as the most unpleasant character in all fiction; jealous and proud of it; a petty, unjust, unforgiving, control-freak; a vindictive, bloodthirsty ethnic cleanser; a misogynistic, ultra extreme ethnocentrist parochial, infanticidal, genocidal, filicidal, pestilential, megalomaniacal, sadomasochistic, capriciously malevolent bully, pyromaniacal, angry, merciless, curse-hurling, vaccicidal, aborticidal, cannibalistic, slavemonger, homicidal, evil, and a terrorist, and it even admits it himself that he creates evil and more, see his website https://unpleasant.ffrf.org/ for easy to read proof with the bible verses people don’t like to admit exists which shows that the OT god is really no god at all but is more an absurd “local” primitive tribal moral monster. (Basically, all that modern day rigmarol about all-knowing, all-wise, all-loving, omni this, omni that etc, especially by telescamvangelists today, is just personal invented faith shekels seeds jimble jamble).

That’s right, the OT tribal Yahweh-Jehovah god of all later Abrahamic religions (aka ” the Great Powerful Serpent-Maker”), and their offshoots and mutations, is really not all that “omni this” and “omni that” or all-powerful and all-knowing as claimed by many excuses-making delusional fabulists, but it instead actually comes across as not particularly smart at all and something that is inept and even easily duped (that is until later when he turns into a malevolent miscreant, genocidal, infanticidal, cannibalistic, jealous, addle-minded, merciless mass-murdering, evil creating, mega-ethnocentrist slavemongering, bloodthirsty and sacrifices demanding tribal overlord when it finally realized that it actually was duped by a puny talking time travelling snake that he didn’t even know existed, so the Abrahamic biblical Yahweh-Jehovah tribal god is actually extremely dumb and contradictory from the start). Also very problematic, thousands of years later supposedly when the god and satan are chatting at his throne, when he is called one of the sons of god, both are on the same team testing, torturing and smiting the Job character and destroying his possessions and killing his family and slaves, satan says he just came back from walking around on the earth back and forth, BUT…SNAKES DON’T WALK!, #gospeltruth. (Ridiculous absurd Job-Yahweh-Satan story explained).

The book title of “Jesus from Outer Space: What the Earliest Christians Really Believed” by Dr. Richard Carrier may seem humorous at first or perhaps even outrageous to scamvangelists, but believe it or not it’s actually a very correct description of the views of the earliest Christians which is supported by the earliest written sources, 100% correct actually. Because even the older Jewish scripture world view has many examples of the same concepts, it was believed that the various angels, demons, Yahweh-Jehovah God’s throne and temple, (the “real outer space Jerusalem” and “real temple” not the imitation Earth ones, there were also mansions and castles and various creatures in “outer space” depending on which of the 7 layers of the outer space heavens you were at), the later Satan-Devil-Lucifer etc character, and that various battles and wars raged and were taking place somewhere “out there” in “outer space”, the whole Satan-Job-God’s bet thing took place in the same “outer space” realm somewhere beyond the Moon in one of the “7 heavens” i.e. – the 7 heavenly layers in the literal physical “outer space”. When various Old Testament superhero characters appeared or disappeared or when prophets or people were snatched they didn’t beam up instantly or teleport into some other plane of existence or alternate tangent unseen spirit universe (like in a Bewitched episode), but instead they just floated up to somewhere “out there” up, up and away above the clouds to “outer space”, almost like a balloon or in a staged play being pulled up by strings and ropes by people behind the curtains (even planets and stars were represented beings in their astrotheology such as how the planet Venus represents the Devil-Satan-Lucifer at different times, as well as other earthly rulers such as the King of Babylon (Shining One/Morning Star/Light bearer etc) as well as representing the Jesus character also)…

Lots of people wonder what did the Jesus character look like anyway? (after the manger, Herod, UFO and Egypt days that is)….well what you see is what you get from the official sources, he looks like a freak apparently and probably has a hard time eating a hamburger too.

Interestingly the answer is, in all of the 27 books in the NT there is actually only one instance where the reader gets any physical description of his appearance, and that would be in the book of Revelation as illustrated above (and strangely a book used as a plot or theme for even a number of Hollywood movies for some weird reason). Because as the newest scheming and lurking secret underworld apocalyptic blood magic death cult (aka the blood magic mind control doomsday death cult “Jesus Gang” by some historians and scholars), had started to slowly spread and mutate further, then eventually yet another book was conjured and patched together by their secret suspicious dark sectarian writer going by the name of “John” writing on the Greek island of Patmos, and lo and behold it’s the one and only NT physical description of the Jesus character found anywhere (Yahwehism-Jehovahism sure is weirdly about lots of swords…1/4 of the planet being killed “by sword“, swords coming out of mouths, sword this sword that, heck even an angel in the garden has a sword and steel wasn’t even invented yet, oh and chariots all over the place too, you can’t have a doomsday without weird creatures and things riding chariots can you?). However, it is known that he largely borrowed and adapted symbolisms, tropes and descriptions from the Hebrew bible/OT books of Daniel, Ezekiel, Psalms and Isaiah to fabricate his particular incoherent ramblings and delusional alternate universe fantasy narrative, and it very apparently seems to be at a time when “the writer” had a total psychotic mental break with reality during a period of psychosis and a heightening obsessed fixation delirium (which is usually the case with these fringe doomsday groups then and even now, it’a a thing), with the in his mind soon coming victory of his blood magic death cult leader from outer space, and for his faithful loyal minions also, i.e. – victory of his one world theocratic Yahwehism-Jehovahism mind control blood magic government and ruled by a kingdom of back from the dead genderless zombie priests with new spacesuit bodies and fancy robes…then choir singing 24 hrs a day and ruling the planet forever! Glo-Ry! The author is so obviously deranged and delusional in his imaginary multi-headed and bodied winged anthropomorphic creatures, and rivers of flowing blood, and beasts and dragons out of the sea, and strange beings, winepresses of blood, lamps and trumpets and falling stars to earth, horses with lion heads breathing fire, smoke, sulfur and with tails of biting snakes, smoke from the abyss and scorpions (and the Euphrates river also of course because you just gotta have the Euphrates river included, everyone knows that) and other similar mental disordered abstract concepts ravings, that in a way he actually even makes the former Heaven’s Gate leader Marshall Applewhite in a way seem almost completely normally sane by comparison (because at least he and his small group were the only ones involved in their particular views and beliefs, and they were not attempting to apply it to or include others outside of their small group to join them, and especially not applying their views and beliefs onto the entire world and every humanoid in it). Anyway, it is what it is and that’s what the Jesus looks like according to the bible supposedly, and that’s straight from the horse’s mouth. #gospeltruth.

…However, remaining written evidences clearly show that the earliest and oldest cults and sects of later so-called “Christians” (i.e. – the various many earliest apocalyptic Jewish cults and secret mystery religions adherents and gnostics that eventually mutated to become so-called “Christians” only much later), most of them never even believed in an actual physically born “Jesus” character, they instead believed he arrived from somewhere “out there” from “outer space” from a different god not related to the OT main skydaddy. Interestingly, even the Saul/Paul character who is the first writer about the topic and also the first writer in the NT and who takes up over half of it (that we have remaining textual evidence for anyway but it’s still only from the 3rd century anyway, so who the heck knows what any earlier original material (edited redacted material?) was comprised of), he never at any time even mentions anything ever about any phyisical Jesus actually being on earth or being born on Earth, or born by Mary or even born by any earthly mother, or performing any miracles or magic, having a ministry, raising zombies, curing lepers and the blind from demons etc or even actually being crucified on earth by anyone. In a way his supposed writings are actually more in line with Marcion and other gnostic mystery religions types gurus/writers who likewise believed Jesus was not born as an actual physical man on Earth but instead was a descending “phantasm” that “came down” from “out there” in deepest “outer space” (SPACE, SPAce, SPace, space, space…)…

A more detailed explanation and the less well-known facts about the real Iron Age origins of later Levantine blood magic sorcery cults and sectarian beliefs, abstract concepts wacky theologies, astrotheologies, cosmologies and related primitive thought patterns and behaviorisms, from the author (You won’t hear these facts and truths from telescamvangelists, pastors and preachers because their primary aim and job is to specifically and intentionally hide all these facts and truths from the unknowing clueless masses, usually by using their “Pretend Truths” modus operandi and just pretending, inventing and making up a bunch of other stuff as theological smoke and mirrors illusionary truths).
And then not even getting into the many real world events and situations which are further fails upon fails examples of the early Paul and later Jesus Gang gospels novels beliefs and predictions etc, which would take many, many, many posts and blogs to cover all the examples. For instance, and not even getting into the ancient Alexandria, Antioch and today’s absurd Jerusalem fiasco which is a total debacle mess of a situation. Above we see the Holy Hagia Sophia Grand Mosque in Istanbul Turkey, which everyone knows used to be the Hagia Sophia Cathedral in the former Constantinople which used to be the capital city of the Eastern Roman Empire/Byzantium for centuries (and even renamed as the “New Rome” by then Emperor Constantine). Built in 537 it eventually was turned into a mosque after the Fall of Constantinople in 1453 to the Muslim Ottoman Empire. In a nutshell, what’s up with that then? that’s now almost 600 years of being a mosque instead of a promised new genderless zombie spacesuit body-fest in the clouds as guaranteed almost 2,000 years ago supposedly, surely St. Paul, Jesus and St. Peter and the various anonymous gospels novels writers and so-called “church fathers” must then be very upset, embarrassed and ready to send some good ol’ OT smitings and plagues. And not only that, the Hagia Sophia in Istanbul in Turkey (known as Anatolia back then because the Turkic tribes didn’t arrive there from the east until the 11th century), it still today remains the center of the Orthodox Christianity faith…But wait a second, 600 year old newsflash… it’s a mosque! in a now Muslim country! Just think about that for a second, it’s like France being the headquarters for Islam. In other words, It’s a frikin muslim mosque in a muslim country which is a verily embarrassing fucked up snafu situation (it’s even weird strange to even have a mosque inside a former infidel cathedral anyway, it’s sort of like putting a mosque in a former infidel pagan temple, or like converting the Japanese Izumo-taisha shrine into a Jehovah’s Witness’ kingdom hall, or the Buddhist Mahabodhi Temple into a Jewish synagogue, or the Mormon main Salt Lake Temple into a Hindu Temple etc, and it’s just yet another proof that it’s all a man-made Abrahamic religions theologies vortex of mutations making more mutational primitive thought and behaviorism patterns vortexes resulting in even further invented failed theologies). For those already familiar with the history of this topic, then you’ll know that the leaders in Serbia claimed for a time that Belgrade will be the new 3rd Rome (but it was soon instead controlled and ruled by the Turkish muslims for over 400 years which is sort of the opposite of becoming a new Rome) and then in Russia leadership also claiming that Moscow will be the 3rd Rome (what next 4th Rome? 5th..6th? even Charlemagne in the 8th-9th century could have declared a new Rome somewhere but he didn’t much care about it and he just let Rome stay in Rome…although if he did it could very well have expedited the appearance of the Beast and probably the capture of Jerusalem by the Dragon and False Prophet from out of the sea, you never know), but this is all just more absurd smoke and mirrors “pretend world” mythomania dreaming and gabbing powers not meaning anything in reality, because there is and was no need for a so-called 3rd or new Rome (why?..because Rome is already in Rome where it’s always been, that’s right Rome is actually in Rome and didn’t teleport or disappear to anywhere, if you go to Rome today you will even actually be in the exact same Rome that was Rome in Roman times when it was coincidentally known as Rome, it’s true believe it or not, I’m not Italian or Roman but I fully admit that Rome is in Rome. We know that in the 4th century the Goths, Vandals and various barbaric tribes invaded Italy, and that soon imperial Rome fell being replaced by various so-called “barbaric kingdoms” and rulers (Odoacer, Alaric, Genseric, Theoderic, Vitiges, Totila etc) but they didn’t bring along any new religion and theologies taking over temples or buildings etc, or even intervene or interfere or much care for any religious dealings going on because they were mostly pagans and they even considered themselves upholders of the direct line of Roman tradition and existence (and they never attempted to impose Gothic as the new official language and culture either), they mainly ruled the former Rome and Roman empire and administered it from then on but it still existed and so Rome didn’t actually go anywhere because it’s where it’s always been, but that’s another topic). The only thing that one can logically conclude from the transpired events and situation in even just this example then is that St. Paul, Jesus and the gospels novels writers were wrong and way, way, way off in their predictions and just plain liars…or that Jesus must have changed his mind and said “Ahhh fuck it all to hell this fucking shit, I’m gonna let these guys have my cathedral I’m too busy doing other stuff” or “Geeez, I’m too busy making bleeding paintings miracles, curing headaches demons possessions and showing my face in crackers and toast, just open a mall there instead” or something similar (In a way when you think about it, it probably would have even been better if the Muslims destroyed it then built a brand new mosque in its place, because by using it they’re basically giving a big middle finger to the religion, and so that’s almost 600 years of middle fingers which is hugely embarrassing and problematic, as well as making the religion completely baseless and pointless). What are the opinions of current day telescamvangelists, fabulist ad hoc rationalizing pastors, preachers using abstract mental gymnastics and similar fabulizing gurus about even just this one particular historical fail?, well not much really and actually nothing at all, because in their “Pretend World” I discussed earlier it’s not important, it doesn’t mean anything or they just pretend the problematic reality doesn’t exist and didn’t happen and that everything’s hunky dory gosh dang darn diddly darn dang ding dong doodly darned glorious and biblical and Glo-Ry! etc. That’s because the main thing is just getting lots of faith seeds shekels for their temples coffers, selling lots of books and DVDs, more air time and coffee and cake gabbing meetings (and lots of miraculous headaches and itchy feet miracle cures and “miracle oils” of course). Heck, I bet if the above scene was instead in front of the Eiffel Tower, the White House, Buckingham Palace, Prague Castle, Tokyo Stadium, the Brandenburg Gate, Forbidden City Palace, Disneyland Castle etc, telescamvangelists would still be doing their “Pretend World” shticks and schemes ad nauseam…because that’s the mighty “Power of Pretend“. Real things and real history fails and real world contradictions and failed predictions problems that are opposite to claims are irrelevant when it comes to the great magical “Pretend World” in their minds basically. Image: cnn

(Actually, after updating this post there’s even more related nonsense going on even as I’m writing this about some of the above information, again with the so-called “Christian World”. As Russia is currently invading Ukraine again, in the news once again is the behind the scenes church politics going on that is never far behind the politicians. The Russian Orthodox Church clergy leadership and spokesmen (the previously KGB-approved Russian Orthodox Church I should add which explains much) vilifying the Ukrainian Orthodox Church and nation and supporting the invasion, and the Serbian Orthodox Church (which already has big problems and conflicts with the Montenegrin Orthodox Church and Macedonian Orthodox Church and even their very existence) is once again also supporting the Russian invasion and because they also do not recognize the existence of the Ukrainian Orthodox Church considering it illegal and heretical, although just politically heretical at most because it actually is legally recognized as autocephalous independent and equal by the Patriarch of Constantinople (Istanbul), however already there are reports of the Serbian public and media displaying public support for the defeat of Ukraine with a number of Serb politicians stating that Ukrainians are just trash, Serb church representatives taking part in rallies supporting the Russian Jesus invasion of Ukraine, actually even stating that Putin is a great Serb and the Serbian Orthodox Church leadership largely just parroting the propaganda statements coming from mental case Putin, the Kremlin and the state-controlled television propaganda, and even reports of Serb paramilitaries and volunteers going to support the Russians on the battlefields (again like since 2014) as usual under the guise of “Orthodox brothers” fighting their European enemies and representing some sort of weird imaginary “True Orthodox Cyrillic World” vs. the European Democratic Non-Cyrillic Non-Orthodox Countries…that aren’t really countries or even nations and people supposedly according to their politico-religious mythomania delusions (although Bulgaria, Greece and Romania have their own national autocephalous independent Orthodox Churches already but they’re not involved in the imaginary holy battle propaganda or support the Russian invasions either, the only other major supporters of the invasion currently in the news are the Iranian leader Ali Khamenei, Ramzan Kadyrov of Chechnya and North Korea’s Kim Jong-un and that doesn’t help their case much the way I see it), and so the absurdities carnival vortex and “Jesus Politics” continues, Jesus is a really awful and absurd politician it seems and can’t get it right just like his old man, that’s besides not keeping his promises, giving anymore secret mystical cryptic news scoops or blinding visions to anybody or even existing in the first place (unless of course the ultimate plan is to conquer Istanbul-Constantinople to have their flag rightfully fly above the Hagia Sophia (Jesus was evicted and sent packing from there in the 15th century and so he should rightfully be allowed to move back home to live in his house shouldn’t he?, instead of being homeless and mostly travelling around the television stations in North Carolina, Virginia and Texas which is just really pathetic (am I the only one who knows these heavenly sent mystical truths and divinely revealed cryptic esoteric secrets?). I declare then that…Mr. Putin, now is the time to end the blasphemous shame and bring Jesus home already and then have a great big Welcome Home party!…including balloons, party favors, ribbons, confetti, sparklers and lots of bacon-wrapped garlic butter pan-fried shrimp, lobster, crab salad and pork tenderloin of course, perhaps even inviting all of Abraham’s brothers to the party so probably ordering extra wine would be a good idea, a great big exciting Abrahamic house opening shindig basically), but then again perhaps Putin and his very few allies-minions are the real Christians as they claim, killing foreign country civilians and children and destruction for the lord just like good ol’ Joshua back in the glorious exciting bible hocus pocus adventures times, although come to think of it Joshua and his generals and later rulers would have certainly killed all the Christians back then too for being heretical abominations idolators and gentile infidel pagans not obeying the specifically given blood magic rules and laws of the Yahweh-Jehovah which he demanded (he demanded that every single one of them be strictly followed…or else, you don’t get to cherry pick which laws to follow people), and so that would surely cause him to be likewise smiteful today and pronounce a curse or plague or something). It’s all very absurd and reminiscent of the whole Jim Bakker vs. Jerry Falwell conflict and back and forth accusations war (the prophetess-apostless Tammy-Faye was wailing and lamenting crying so much all the time so it must have surely also been an excruciating painful time, even her doghouse she mentions in one of the videos below, rumor says that it was left decrepit and falling apart and practically in ruins just like the Jerusalem temple way back, it’s almost prophetic in a way and probably predicted in the bible somewhere). However maybe the Pope, Pat Robertson, Kenneth Copeland or Benny Hinn (or some of the other television shekels faith seeds prophets apostles in some videos below) will put on their fresh clean undies laid out for them on their bed in the morning, wave their hands and work it all out with their heaven sent gabbing tongues powers and magical water, or at least make a cream and fruit-filled pastry appear out of thin air and seen by many).

Numbers 15:32–36…”While the people of Israel were in the wilderness, they found a man gathering sticks on the Sabbath day. And those who found him gathering sticks brought him to Moses and Aaron and to all the congregation. They put him in custody, because it had not been made clear what should be done to him. And the Lord said to Moses, “The man shall be put to death; all the congregation shall stone him with stones outside the camp.” And all the congregation brought him outside the camp and stoned him to death with stones, as the Lord commanded Moses.“…

…But we see these blatant transgressions against Yahweh-Jehovah every weekend these days including even picking up rakes, shovels, brooms, pails and bags and outrageously even branches. plants, shrubs, dirt and even piles of grass and leaves, grabbing and moving around dirt and plants, sometimes even lifting and moving around boxes and bags full of stuff people!…on the very lord’s weekend people!!! If today’s televangelist shekels prophets were actually real apostles of Yahweh-Jehovah instead of being just bad shekels actors, then we could finally righteously put a stop to all these blatantly heretical transgressors who are disobeying the lord’s given words and making a mockery and who even verily mocketh his word name and his very written words and word name laws (I’m pretty sure I also see cotton-polyester blend tops and women wearing men’s pants fashion which is then actually a diabolical triple transgression, and if they ended up having bacon-wrapped shrimp with cheese sauce for lunch it could very well even be a 6 transgression day which would be a blatant nefarious disobedience display of biblical proportions I tell you. When oh when oh lord will the transgressors stop and finally repent of their offences against the lord’s weekend and enter through the temple gates of glorious Zion with joy and amazement, let them at last make amends to the glorious celestial yom kippur goat skylord and thus praise his father Yahweh-Jehovah with the gifts of many lamps, ample oil, unblemished sheep and pigeons etc, amen)…

Anyway, that’s as far as I’ll go in this post regarding the nativities stories topic, there’s more problematic issues and contradictions involved as well as parallels with older pagan religions stories and legends, which I would have to make a bunch of posts about to go over point by point, as well as cases of mistranslating and changing meanings of appropriated text excerpts, but I think even these few highlighted main points suffice to prove my position. Historical inaccuracies, hocus pocus, contradictions and red flags all over the place which clearly indicate and prove that we are dealing with anonymously written personal fictions, religious syncretism patterns, ancient cultural diffusions and various invented, changed and mutating theologies.

Without even getting into dinosaur’s and plate tectonics times hundreds of millions of years ago to meteorite impact craters from billions of years ago (or parsecs and light years and carbon-based life, accelerating expanding universe, and a bunch of other cosmic scientific facts), but still long before the invention of the wheel, cheese stuffed crust 5-meat pizza, latex balloon pants, farming and the modern day concept of free range chickens, the example of the European hunter-gatherers of the Stone Age, Upper Paleolithic, through the LGM Ice Age and to the Mesolithic spanning from well over 50,000 to about 5,000 years ago, is another evidence that the biblical history-chronology is bonkers ridiculous not in touch with the real world (and especially their various so-called “genealogies” as infantile absurd fables almost like a comedy). Because we have learned that there were at times different archaic humanoids and human species’ living simultaneously on the planet on the different continents and regions of the world with each having their own physical characteristics, we know by proven evidences there were various archaic multiregional humanoids evolutions and later still microevolutions within the multiregional evolutions including their later cultural, technological and even gastronomy, hair and clothes fashions evolutions history which have continued and still exist even right up to our day, the various pygmy peoples being one well known example (yet they expect lucid sane people to believe that various Caucasoid, Negroid and other Asian branches of populations and their proven regional microevolutions, and the New World Indigenous Native tribes peoples also who go back at least 10’s of thousands of years ago, all of them just go back to some newly appeared Adam in a garden 6,000 years ago? or even more absurd actually from only just a Noah character family, from only his 3 sons only 4,700 years ago?…when the Akkadian Empire and Indus Valley civilization were already approaching their height? time of the Egyptian Old Kingdom and the already long established Danubian culture civilization period? and other civilizations and empires, but only 8 people on the planet at the time you say?, only 8 people on the entire planet Earth? That’s it just 8 people on the planet 4,700 years ago?…hehehe that’s a good one, I and just about any other sane person call bullshitism on that, invent and tell some more magical stories they’re hilarious and quite a creative “Pretend World” comedy). These various classifications and branches of humanoids took millions and then hundreds of thousands and then tens of thousands of years to evolve and attain their characteristics and start civilizations and become the humanoids of the present period, they didn’t just magically appear out of thin air in the recent past Bronze Age like a rabbit out of a hat, or one of those canes that turn into a flower magic trick (same goes for other mammals and animals). We have many evidences leading right up to the Holocene period, that people had religious rituals, shamanistic traditions, ritual burials and they also left behind many cave paintings and archaeological evidences that we are still finding today. And although many televangelists and scamvangelists and related fabulist charlatan minions disagree and refuse to believe, the truth is that would be a lot longer before any Abrahamic religions and their biblical 6.000 year old universes even existed or was even thought up yet (seriously where exactly does an Adam and Eve and talking snake fit into this proven real world history? these Upper Paleolithic humans would have existed even before the moon and sun which was made after the earth according to their history narrative). To be so fixated and manic-obsessed with only just that ancient Canaan-Levant universe bubble and their neurotic fixations-mania with their various fictions stories and superheroes characters, can even correctly be termed as a mental illness and likewise as sick people with a psychosis out of touch with reality (using that “Pretend Truth” methodology I mentioned earlier), 8 out of 10 Ice Age EEMH cavepeople agree and insist they verily existed and ate bison steaks long before a talking snake duped the god of the garden. The above scene recreates the people in their hut having a bison steaks bbq and roasted chestnuts during the Upper Paleolithic period circa. 40,000 years ago. Image: Frank Wiersema

And it’s really not surprising, remember humanoids over thousands of years have become very good at telling various stories, many of them are even very complicated and full of various new weird abstract concepts, magical thinking and pretend world ideas, as well instances of people outright lying (that’s right, perhaps shocking to many but I even checked various sources and came across at least 20-30 cases in history of people just outright lying, as in just personally invented lying, and that’s just going back to 1911! I even have very valid reasons to believe that the numbers may even be 5 to 10 times more liars than even that! Because when you have all the time in the world sitting around for decades and lifetimes pathologically obsessed, consumed-fixated and just focusing on writing and inventing a religion and that’s all, then it’s not really that hard to invent all sorts of stuff and lie about stuff), and some are badly thought out and primitive and absurd invented stories and cosmologies, some stories go off in this direction and others go off in that direction to invent and incorporate more bullshitism depending on the agenda of the author/storyteller, some mutate and syncretize with other stories and become a new story, or even new stories again going off in different directions and diffusing and mutating again (which is still going on even today…because the newer invented ideas, concepts and abstract mental gymnastics theologies may mutate and change but the underlying fundamental basic modus operandi of blood magic mind control cults and sectarian beliefs is still the same as thousands of years ago)…

The great eternal chasm of “Mythomania” vs. sanity and known documented real world “Reality”.
Because we know that the Noah’s ark and flood and Garden of Eden stories are direct results of borrowings, cultural diffusion and religious syncretism and folklore mutations from older pagan fable legends and stories in the Levant, such as adaptions from the Epic of Gilgamesh of ancient Mesopotamia as just one example, then it’s sort of funny that Abrahamic religions are ultimately following and believing in ancient pagan Mesopotamian inspired legends and myths, which very well could be heretical and blasphemous. Or even more weird, the biblical tribal Y-J deity in its outer space sky castle temple has to cheat sheet copy or at least greatly emulate older pagan myths ideas and legends, which shows no originality right from the start.
Authority is Truth,….Yes Authority is Truth, Truth is NOT Authority…Yes Truth is NOT Authority,
Right from the beginning of the purported 1st Paul cabal writings to the later mutated and developing and mutating some more new religion, still even today but especially the early period, their greatest worry was always that any dedicated and persistent truth-seekers in the world might take the trouble to expose their hoax. Paul had to entice and frighten innocent and simple-minded gullible peasants into believing his outrageous concoctions and claims, he had to brainwash them into submission to obey and listen to only him and him alone (i.e. – nobody else, only him and not other “Christians” who were Christians even before Paul while Paul was arresting, beating them and putting them in prison). He, and his cabal after him (especially and mainly because of his failed promised doomsday and new immortal spacesuit body zombifications during his lifetime guaranteed by his celestial skylord), they therefore had to vehemently oppose any intellectual methodology that might lead to the truth, therefore empiricism, evidences, proofs, but especially rationality, logic, common sense thinking, science, reality, were enemies to the early cults and sects and from the Devil character, they were tools of the Devil. All these things would henceforth also become enemies of the newly appearing so-called churches, converts who did not follow blindly were allied with the Devil (i.e. – asking questions or studying the real natural world, real cosmos, real history, real causes of diseases and finding cures, science and scientific discoveries etc is Devil’s work). If the new conscript refused to believe every single statement, utterance, creed, abstract concepts theological construct, myth, fable construct, every fabricated lie and magical thinking hocus pocus story…on “faith”, 100% every single one of them, they were then under the power of the Devil doing the Devil’s work, mind control at its finest…

…The Lord told me such and such…Yes the Lord told you such and such, The zombies were raised seen by many….Yes the zombies were raised seen by many, Talking snakes and magical fruit exists…Yes talking snakes and magical fruit exists, There are no contradictions or fictions it’s ALL true even the lies you have the faith…Yes there are no contradictions or fictions it’s ALL true even the lies I have the faith, The Lord spoke to me and said this and that..Yes the Lord spoke to you and said this and that, You will not pick up sticks on weekends or boil a goat in it’s mother’s milk…Yes I will not pick up sticks on weekends or boil a goat in it’s mother’s milk, The Lord Yahweh said kill the men, women and children and babies…Yes the Lord Yahweh said kill the men, women and children and babies, Jonah lived in the fish for 3 days…Yes Jonah lived in the fish for 3 days, Magical thinking and blood magic faith will give you a future immortal zombie spacesuit body…Yes magical thinking and blood magic faith will give me a future immortal zombie spacesuit body…The Lord told me that…Yes the Lord told you that, Hallelujah Amen Glory…Yes Hallelujah Amen Glory, You will give many faith shekels seeds to the temple coffers…Yes I will give many faith shekels seeds to the temple coffers, The holy spirit said to me…Yes the holy spirit said to you, My magical thinking in my mind is the truth and real…Yes the magical thinking in your mind is the truth and real, If you do not follow my exact instructions and worldview theologies you will get the eternal fire burnings and worms…Yes if I do not follow your exact instructions and worldview theologies I will get the eternal fire burnings and worms, You will not ask questions, doubt or enquire about things…Yes I will not ask questions, doubt or enquire about things,

This is not mind control…Yes this is not mind control…

…storytellers and fables makers from the Bronze Age and Iron Age, from the ancient Romans and Greeks, from ancient Egyptians, from ancient Mesopotamia, from the Sumerians, Babylonians, Akkadians, Phoenicians, Hebrews, Canaanites, Persians, Zoroastrianism etc and so on (and lots of old and even older stories and legends from the ancient Chinese, Indians, Japanese etc also, lots of people forget that and that the world is actually much larger than just the Middle East or just ancient Canaan, a whole lot larger actually). Heck I’ll bet cavepeople during the Ice Age and Stone Age 40,000 years ago were without a doubt telling various stories around the fire in their caves and huts when not painting and drawing art on the walls, making weapons, decorative objects, clothes or when eating bbq mammoth and bison steaks. Humanoids tell stories basically.

A brief introduction to some of the facts and topics discussed here (although there’s much more contradictions, errors, problematic issues and related astounding earthshaking problematic facts not fully examined here because they would cause many to leave all the Abrahamic religions in a jiffy and probably immediately rightfully burn all their various bibles, korans and tanakhs so as to free their souls from damnation and the eternal Egyptian Lake of Fire and burning worms and pitchforking), and it’s stuff you sure won’t hear from necromantic telescamvangelists, pastors and fabulist preachers etc, (and their book writers and DVDs also of course, pay particular attention at 43:06 which is very suspicious shekels shenanigans going on, the Paul character in “his” writings actually a number of times alludes to rightful coins donations for himself which sure is wierd considering he believed the end of the world was going to happen during his lifetime and any day…or hour, which is just like deceitful telescamvangelists-witches and similar fables purveyors-fabulists today) because it complicates the shekels seeds for the cultic temples coffers and coffee and cake meetings, and because it “factually” contradicts and complicates their “Pretend World” alternate reality and failed apocalyptic guru superheroes origins stories, as well as because it exposes many of the scheming suspicious dark underworld cult members characters, their early obscure sectarian filth abstract concepts theologies thinking patterns and behaviorisms, and their primitive mind control propaganda and mutating fake news industry schemes (cartoons included).

At my very first post “National Security Alert: Foreign Televangelists, Cults, Sects“ I touch upon a cornucopia of problematic issues, contradictions and wrong information throughout both the Old Testament and New Testament texts, as well as a bunch of related facts and historical information that’s good to know. And all 3 Abrahamic religions (and all their many offshoots) are directly affected, I’m actually not singling out any of them because they all come from the same original sources anyway, from the same geographically coterminous cultures and their primitive behaviorisms, from the same cultural and religious milieus, diffusions and syncretisms. Even just the very existence of all 3 Abrahamic religions (and all their mutations and offshoots) is proof and further evidence that none of them are what they claim and pretend to be. If someone doubts that statement, then in the Middle East just what is it that Christianity actually ushered in? Well, from the after the fact state of things for centuries it helped give birth to another monstrous Abrahamic mutations creation and repulsive faith system known as Mohamudanism and Islam, that’s the facts, the repugnant Islamic Abrahamic world of grotesqueries and make-believe is predominant across the Levant and Middle East primarily because of the following further inventions and mutations from the Christianities that existed before it, ipso facto.

Robin the so-called Boy Wonder had a hard time differentiating between fact and anonymously written contradictory theological agendas and pretend world mythomania fictions because he was under magical thinking mind control from the local apostle-witches, he later went on to become Pat Robertson’s personal chauffeur and pool cleaner helping to defeat numerous demon sweaters and slacks.

Like I briefly mentioned at the beginning of this post, I still have no general issues with the Hibernal Solstice/Midwinter holidays (including the related New Year’s Eve) and the various related customs, traditions and festivities for the already explained reasons, basically because they come from the ancient Pagan Croat Hyperborean tribes time in antiquity, times that long predate the much, much, much later so-called new “Christmas Holidays”, and many of them were over time incorporated into the holiday anyway, i.e. – the interesting enjoyable stuff and foods and hooch etc. So it doesn’t mean I’m going to all of a sudden jump on the bandwagon and convert to become a Mormon, or Jehovah’s Witness, Muslim or Baha’i, or even to Buddhism or Hinduism etc either (I don’t particularly believe for a second there’s any chance of me reincarnating into another animal, bird, rodent or into crawling bug maggot larvae or an angler fish, and besides the Ganges is not all that great for a ritualistic dip these days anyway the last time I read about it, and the Jordan river is high on the polluted list too so that doesn’t get impressive high holy marks either (that one really bothers me a lot because I’m a big supporter of saving the environment, wildlife, trees, air and water, I mean if it’s that holy and important I would enact laws and strict regulations to keep the water as clean as possible, because also every year lots of tourists go there, although usually it’s just mostly various brainwashed religious cult members and fundamental fanatical religious sect groups who go there to put on strange robes, stare at the clouds and dip their toes or head to hopefully catch a glimpse of a magical pigeon purportedly living in the area, and because it’s supposedly where the Ephraimites were slain by Jephthah and where many Midianites were slain supposedly, then to buy souvenirs, trinkets, bottled water and burgers [The pollution of the river is largely a result of raw sewage coming from Israeli, Palestinian and Jordanian sources, plus agricultural run-off – largely pesticides and fertilisers – and hormone-enriched effluent from fish farms, according to Friends of the Earth Middle East (FoEME), who also call it “a very unholy mix” which has destroyed the ecosystem, I rest my case]…although it’s guaranteed that I and everyone in the history of the world including the reader, will eventually be a decomposing corpse being eaten by maggot larvae that’s a given, unless you’re cremated of course), I also can’t join the Shinto religion either even if I wanted too because I’m not Japanese the last time I checked (Where will I go then? It’s a secret adventure…maybe where Zalmoxis, Dionysus, or Hercules is or maybe Valhalla or to the infinite eternal Hyperborean bliss with plenty topnotch pork tenderloin, bacon wrapped garlic-butter pan fried shrimp, wines, beers and hooch etc, or maybe even a Land of Oz-ish type scenario (can anyone prove it won’t be or that people haven’t moved on and aren’t actually there right this very minute? Because if our world can have coins just appear out of fish mouths, walking on and separating waters, sticks turning into snakes, and buns and fish sticks magically appearing by the bushels out of thin air, talking donkey and snake, making the earth stop rotating and moon stop orbiting, coming back from the dead by accidentally touching a skeleton bone, making sundials magically work backwards (that’s a good one also requiring the earth to suddenly stop and rotate backwards and then stop and go forward again, pretty darn impressive stuff), ufo-stars appearing, disappearing and reappearing, singing floating glowing aliens, hairy as goat-fur people, multi-headed leviathan sea monster, multi-headed human-animal hybrid winged creatures and wheels covered in eyeballs, turning water into wine, instant tree-killing powers, demons possessing people and swine shenanigans, six-fingered and six-toed Nephilim giants who can swim better than Aquaman, magical giant boat with penguins and polar bears but with no windows (whew stinky!), living in a fish for 3 days, magical pigeons and zombies seen by many and various blood magic sorcery etc, then what’s so farfetched?), because seriously who in their right mind wants to live eternally, all the time forever and ever, with Jehovah’s Witnesses, with Osama Bin Laden types, with Joshua the babies killer and his types, with Kenneth Copeland, Joyce Meyer, Jack Van Impe, Morris Cerullo or Jesse Duplantis etc? or just burning and hanging around Dante’s Inferno or the Egyptian Lake of Fire eternally? Not me that’s for sure it’s all yours if the reader believes them and their stories, besides I don’t even like singing in humongous choirs or trumpets anyway I’d much more prefer even just a jukebox or the radio). I definitely also won’t start believing in some tin foil hat, or even any strange pointless weird dumb hat, magical UFO religion, or worshipping a head of lettuce or the omnipotent mushroom or potato religion, or some some ghost of the vegan-dinosaurs religion, or some zombified Bigfoots who appeared out of the pyramids and then later founded Atlantis and built stone megaliths, cosmic shadow beings from whatever planet or similar teleporting ancient alien shape-shifting reptilians from some other galaxy or tangent universe religions either. Just changing one for another overnight just because someone says it’s the best correct way doesn’t make it any more real or the so-called right religion just because I want to think it is (Well, I could possibly join the teleporting ancient alien shape-shifting reptilians religion because they could quite possibly possess the legendary elixir of immortality that I read about somewhere, there’s a bottle of it buried somewhere in the Alps or Carpathians supposedly according to some sources).

Don’t shave because I said so, but dang it will be a great day when your enemies the gentiles bash their babies against the rocks.

And interesting to remind also, all the scholars, skeptics, mythicists and people who study and investigate these topics, none of them really have to go far and search far and wide to support their evidences, views and opinions (or make up evidences and proofs for their findings and claims either), because the actual written texts is their evidences and proofs basically, the texts contradictions and errors were already written out for them so they don’t have to make things up and do mental gymnastics and perform personal ad hoc rationalizations to explain anything (as well as the problematic “argument from silence” and “absence of evidence” which again is another proof in the mythicists camp and really is big problems for historicists)…

Because the snake was a better hide ‘n seek player obviously, there’s no other way to explain it, even Jesus and all the trumpeter angels didn’t know where he was, so he was probably the best hide ‘n seek player in the history of all existence ever since the beginning of time and space and time existence so don’t ask pointless ridiculous questions. #gospeltruth.

…because the various physical, archaeological, scientific and contemporaneous non-biblical written material evidences are just further supplementary bonus material in the mythicist’s corner which give them more weight behind their conclusions and findings, i. e. – it’s the examined and found problematic issues and contradictions in the Abrahamic texts written material themselves which give a lot of the mythicists, scholars and skeptics their evidences in the first place (and you sure can’t blame the mythicists for their conclusions, textual evidences and findings because they’re not the ones who wrote it making the various claims in the first place).


So as a final summation and synopsis of the basic presented points regarding even just this one “Nativity Story” topic, just as the post title reads, the information clearly and without a doubt unequivocally proves that “both” of the nativity story versions are absolute 100% fiction. We can easily deduce and confidently conclude from the primary source texts that the desperate attempts of both of the anonymous authors was primarily to invent and fabricate a new “theological” genesis story for their new fringe apocalyptic blood magic death cult movement (a fringe sectarian apocalyptic doomsday movement that at the time was completely unknown in the historical record and apparently on the verge of extinction as all the original founding members were already dead and many remaining disappointed members had left and were leaving the cult, a fact mentioned and supported by other later so-called church fathers). And to help accomplish this endeavor by primarily using various gematria magical numbers numerology calculations and each one using a previous anonymous so-called Mark gospel as a template and even largely copied from, that each author was writing a new fan fiction model for only their own personal local sectarian group, and so that for these reasons in the process all the contradicting events, chronologies, characters involved (magical and non-magical), theological and known real history problematic issues are abound. Also included was the proven self-evident parallels and obvious adaptions we see regarding previous much, much older and already known and popular pagan religions “miraculous virgin birth” mythemes and legends that were used as basic literary templates for the new superhero genesis stories, albeit used within their own particular Yahwehisn-Jehovahism worldview contexts

As an inserted Eusebius-Josephus analogy example and a topic explored at my first post, below is the tribal Yahweh-Jehovah’s (aka “God” to some people for some weird nonsensical reason) “Official Secret Recipe For Curing Leprosy” that he wrote in the book of Leviticus and that’s the official blood magic that’s right from the camel’s mouth that you simply can’t deny, and it’s the most wisest best leprosy cure from the most wisest all-knower of the universe that today’s doctor’s voodoo witchcraft practitioners and pharmaceutical sorcerers are blatantly and knowingly disobeying, the divine step by step instructions for curing leprosy are…

1 – Get 2 birds, cedar, scarlet yarn and hyssop.
2 – Kill 1 bird over running water in a clay pot.
3 – Dip live bird and stuff in blood and sprinkle 7 times generously on person (to be performed outside of the camp).
4 – Release surviving bloody bird.
5 – On the 7th day, person must wash their clothes, shave all their hair (including eye brows, pubes, arms, legs etc) and then take a bath.
6 – Person to then live as an exile not allowed into their tent for a week.
7 – Afterwards on the 8th day, get 2 young male lambs and 1 ewe, all must be without defects, along with the finest flour mixed with olive oil for a grain offering, and one log of the oil, animals must be declared clean by the priest in front of the tent (deemed clean and absolutely no defects on the animals, very important).
8 – Priest then to kill 1 of the male lambs, then sprinkle blood and paint blood dots on the person (ear lobe, big toe, thumb, hand).
9 – Priest then to sprinkle the oil 7 times.
10 – Priest then to paint oil dots on the person on top of the previous blood dots (ear lobe, big toe etc).
11 – Priest then to put remaining oil on the person’s head.
12 – Priest to then sacrifice and burn the other offerings along with a grain offering.
13 – Presto Magico the leper is healed, it’s a miracle! (if leper can’t afford lambs and ewe then proceed to God’s Leprosy Cure Recipe commanded alternate version which substitutes with pigeons and doves for the lamb and ewe).

*And for Cripe’s Pete’s sake, paint the oil dot not beside, below or above the blood dot, it has to be painted on top of the blood dots or the voodoo blood magic cure won’t activate, very important people!

…Also briefly discussed and shown were the instances of cherry picked quotes from the Yahwehism-Jehovahism OT texts, or just portions of quotes, which were then intentionally taken completely out of context so as to fabricate imaginary “prophecies” as imaginary proofs when in fact there actually are none pertaining to their nativity plot because they instead revolve around times, places, characters and events completely unrelated (as well as them being OT prophecies that failed altogether anyway). Also mentioned was the topic of the purported Paul character who is alleged to have been one of the very first founders and propagandists/salesmen for the sect, and who allegedly wrote the very first textual material used as a basis for the doomsday cult decades earlier, but in that case Paul’s new Jesus skylord was only a celestial being that took on a body and was killed and resurrected in one of the layers of outer space somewhere and who never at any time is described or implied as having physically lived on earth or ever being born into it, instead Paul’s “Christianity” was a new apocalyptic doomsday sect that was expecting a newly revealed Jesus skylord to arrive for only the very 1st time (not a 2nd time, or a 3rd time actually) to conquer Jerusalem and then melt their enemies and the planet and make only Paul and his other loyal and privileged minions immortal (as well as any believing minions who already died who would also soon by the process of zombification also attain new genderless immortal spacesuit bodies like Paul, but most importantly only them because only they were privy to Paul’s gnostic mystical esoteric secrets voices information that was downloaded and installed only in Paul’s brains, purportedly directly from his newly revealed skylord in outer space somewhere)…

But shouldn’t demons be able to easily transfer onto you if you even just try the clothes on without buying them? or even if you just touch the clothes or statue?, demons should even be easily able to attach onto people just walking nearby just like bugs or fleas. I’m pretty sure demons can travel farther than just fleas, demons can even invisibly float and teleport everyone knows that. That’s how the demon-cycle operates apparently, jumping from clothes and objects onto people in their brains then from brain to brain and then back into clothes and objects again, for this reason one should especially be very wary of garage sales, rummage sales and flea markets as high-risk areas for demon possession.

This new fringe Yahwehism-Jehovahism-based Jesus skylord apocalyptic doomsday death cult propagated by Paul in his preaching however was supposed to have happened during his lifetime, as he expected and plainly wrote about in very minute detail as being guaranteed by his Jesus skylord, which further proves that the decades later and even into the 2nd century invented anonymous gospels were mainly desperate theological mutations attempts specifically designed for only 1 reason and especially for only that specific time period…i.e. – to save the apocalyptic blood magic death cult from extinction because of their growing defections and dwindling memberships which were a direct result of Paul’s and his celestial Jesus skylord’s failed end of the world doomsday and immortal zombifications promises (especially after the complete destruction of the temple in Jerusalem by the Romans circa 70 CE, which their founding cult writer/propagandist Paul decades earlier had absolutely no idea would ever happen even in his wildest dreams)…

However, I should note that it’s not all bad news and that there is a weird ironic sort of silver lining and paradoxical hope for Christianity that Christians should be grateful for and rejoice to the heavens and clouds about (well most Christianities anyway), how so? Well because as already shown, explained and discussed the 2 major and most important theological elements of all the post-Paul gospels-novels stories are proven to be derived from older pagan religions origins and not from the OT tribal Yahwehism-Jehovahism ethnocentric apocalyptic death cult narratives. So this then disconnects it from Judaism in very important ways, and Islam also by osmosis, neither of whom accept these pagan mythological elements (well actually they accept lots of previous pagan religions ideas and myths as shown ala Mesopotamian, Sumerian, Egyptian, Persian, Zoroastrianism etc, but not these 2 particular foundational pagan mythology ideas). Heck if the ancient Israelites in the OT especially under Joshua and his successors had their way…why gentile Christians would have been bloodily slaughtered and stoned to death on the spot for even insinuating about any miraculous virgin-birth of a superhero saviour or of a dying and rising magic-man demigod superhero and even mentioning any magic-women also. Because the pre-Christian Pagan religion faiths including Mithras, Dionysus, Attis, Osiris, Krishna, Orpheus, Romulus, Remus, Hercules, Horus, the Ptolemies, Alexander the Great, Jason, Plato, Asclepius, Perseus and many other examples, they all predate Judaism and even predate the biblical chronological universe by centuries and even thousands of years (probably even being vestiges from the Ice Age and Paleolithic Stone Age times and their continuing oral legends and mythologies as evidenced by various archaeological artefacts and cave paintings from 10’s of thousands of years before the biblical universe even existed), so basically these proven older gentile pagan faiths and legends beliefs that entered Christianity greatly distance and divorce the religion from the OT Yahwehism-Jehovahism apocalyptic cult narratives and they actually even theologically and mockingly insult the smiting, angry, jealous, wrathful, infanticidal, bloodthirsty, petty, pestilential, pyromaniacal, genocidal tribal Yahweh chump deity, basically he’s just a very local bully of the block, without a doubt if anyone at the presented time would have even implied these pagan faiths ideas then surely Yahweh-Jehovah would have immediately probably sent fire and boiling lava from the sky, earthquakes and poisonous locusts and fiery biting bees (or fiery serpents spitting out poisonous bees and stinging locusts) on them immediately, so basically even if mythological and never having actually happened in the real world anyway you have to look at it as a positive that the older pagan faiths traditional beliefs entered the religion and they even end up being the most important parts and theological pillars of the religion, so stay positive with the gentile pagan’s beliefs and pull that nasty nefarious Yahweh-Jehovah’s beard to hell to pay for his abominable sins (Heck, how do we even know that perhaps in the future another similar miraculous birth of another demigod won’t happen again just as many times before? such as alluded to in some sources about “the prophesied one”, i.e. – the Hyperborean redeemer-liberator but who will instead make much more sense using no secret cryptic parables or tree-killing powers, be way more smarter and perform much greater magical powers feats and coin tricks to astound the nations). And the people should also likewise rejoice to the heavens and clouds because they are only just 2 of the older pagan religion’s derived ideas that are precedents, so there very well could eventually be other and more older various pagan religions mythologies and beliefs that will enter the narrative and theologies and so essentially over time weed out the nefarious impotent OT Yahweh-Jehovah and send him back to drown in the deserts from which it sprang forth from, thus these 2 important precedents actually give people today reasons to be hopeful, merry and joyfully rejoice with gladness.
An 18th century painting of Mary and the Jesus child on their way to the Jerusalem temple to amaze the Pharisees and Sadducees and astonish the Sanhedrin…not really though, it’s a painted portrayal of the child Hercules with his mortal earthly mother Alcmene who gave birth to Hercules after becoming pregnant by the god Zeus. It’s just one of many similar miraculous birth mythologies that were already for many centuries well known all across the Mediterranean world and later even into continental Europe. As mentioned earlier, later after he willingly submits to the 12 labours/punishments, then eventually after suffering and dying his body vanishes but he is soon “resurrected” and “ascends” to heaven becoming a living god with a new “divine superior body,” the addition of after-death appearance narratives also accompanies many of these tales similar to Romulus, and there were already popular Hercules cults existing well before 600 BCE. Among many other examples was the popular hero and result of a virgin birth Perseus, who was born from his mortal earthly virgin mother Danae and the god Zeus also, and his mythology is estimated by scholars to date from the Bronze Age circa. 1300 BCE. But people during the Iron Age wouldn’t actually believe all these miraculous magical birth origins and the hocus pocus floating with new immortal bodies to the heavens mythologies and stories as being real people and actual real events…would they?

…Added into the equation is that other purported cult co-founders (referred to as “the 12” by Paul and who likewise were portrayed as being privy to some sort of alleged dubious cosmic information, but whom Paul admits he was in conflict with and even calling them “false apostles”, which sure is strange) are completely absent from the NT narrative and the real world historical record and especially leaving behind no genuine written material or physical evidences of their existence, points to a select few other sectarian founders who dissolve from existence into obscurity and disappear long before any gospels are written (where they are portrayed as extremely bumbling, forgetful characters possessing unhuman qualities and behaviorisms anyway), thereby leading to strong doubts about their later anonymous gospels novels portrayals as being actual real people or existing in the first place, as well as the evidences we have of numerous other so-called original “Christian” sects and groups with competing and contradictory claims and information from the same early period, then it is apparent that there were numerous fringe “Christ” skylord cults and sects preaching, competing and at war with one another in the first century Levant area but with each one claiming to be the only correct doomsday group (perhaps one or several of them even being behind the arrest and imprisonment of Paul in the first place, or quite possibly including even “the 12” being behind his arrest also before they themselves were eventually killed by other competing and in collusion with authorities Jesus skylord cults and sects, hence their abrupt disappearance and no letters written). Also mentioned was how the early so-called church fathers from the late 1st, 2nd and 3rd centuries especially, were a sort of new mutating theological politburo that spent considerable time and letters writing not against Romans or Greeks or Pagans, but instead and strangely again, rather against…”Christians”, i.e. – those earliest Christians of whom many did not believe that their Jesus was actually physically ever on earth, was not born of a virgin, having no belief in a later new growing trinity concept, a eucharist meal and who wasn’t even resurrected (we have letters today that prove this was the case and that writing against all those other and even original older “Christians” was a major topic and a very big problem for the growing mutating theological politburos aka “church fathers”…such as from Irenaeus, Tertulian, Justin Martyr, Ignatius, Clement I, Eusebius, Origen and many others, so they’re greatest foes in their letters were actually other Christians and not the Pagans which again is very strange, in the 2nd century the prophet evangelist Marcion being a particularly growing major threat and dangerous Christian to their Yahwehism-Jehovahism theologies being just one example as mentioned previously). Combining all these facts that are very plainly evident in the written primary source text materials is then more than enough evidence to unequivocally prove that myths and fictions are found as the basis throughout the examined anonymously written newly fabricated genesis stories discussed here.

According to “the official story” according to the god’s official authorship words, they witness and experience supposedly the greatest ever miraculous events and magic powers and unexplained miraculous phenomena sorcery ever in the history of the world, but just days later they decided it was the cow that led them out of Egypt and did all the hocus pocus for them (You know, I’ve always wondered how one could rationalize this story even back in the Iron Age let alone today, with people implying that it’s real factual history events and characters and not a comedy (even the later fictitious Jesus character believed it was real, which isn’t saying much about the chances of his real existence either), don’t you have to admit and wouldn’t you have to presuppose that something like this conversation actually took place then?…”Hey Nadab, I don’t think this god of Moses’ is really all that great like he says, what’s he done lately anyway? I could really go for some wine and I’m tired of cleaning sand from my ears. You know what I think?…I think the cow did it all and freed us from Egypt…Nadab: I think you may be right Abihu, you have a very strong point there and it makes sense to me…crossing the Red Sea? Nile river and water into blood? firstborn deaths? darkness for 3 days? fire hail? frogs and locusts attacks? boils? pestilences and death angels? pfff big deal that’s amateur anyone can do that, this Yahweh-Jehovah god of Moses’ is really overrated and that cow over there is probably more magical and smarter, yep definitely the cow probably did it” (Eleazer, Adah, Kish, Zebedee, Mizraim, Jonah, Ezekiel, Uriah and a great multitude exclaim: “Yes the cow freed us from Egypt and saved us! The cow will lead us to the promised land and freedom!”)…Aaron: “Hey everyone! Give me all your gold I’m going to make our cow god that took us out of Egypt! All hail the cow Israelites!!”…enter Benny Hill laugh track applause and music).

Yep, so like I said at my very first post introduction (and elaborated on with more evidences at my second post), I guess I could be categorized as an Agnostic-Atheist-Realist, or in a sort of Deism or something like that (i.e. – a Deist in the truest sense of the word definition, mind control-free and not a slave, not forced to believe the lies and being an in bondage slave to another ancient people’s tribal mythologies folklore and primitive superstitions, free from their fabricated histories and pretend world genealogies and universes, fictitious superheroes and contrived characters, free from their invented revelations, phoney and failed prophecies and magical thinking, concocted claims and untrue spurious miracles stories, not a slave to their fake hocus pocus show fables, blood magics, magic numbers sorcery and anonymously written nonsensical contradictory texts, a Deist that has broken off those limiting mind control shackles and is now truly free and not a slave to them anymore, a Deist where truth, common sense reason and reality reigns in the real cosmos, not believing in the imaginary invented cosmos only in some anonymous tribal stranger’s superstitious primitive mind). All I do know is that even the term “religion” is a convoluted word and a labyrinthian term having many meanings, different meanings to different people, and that it has been unequivocally shown and proven in many instances and in many ways that today’s major religions are purely man-made anyway, ipso facto, particularly the Abrahamic religions and their offshoot faiths because all of them originally rise out of particular and strange cultures during specific times and circumstances of the people that the religion initially revolved around and was meant for, essentially and truthfully it’s all another people’s national myths and folklore revolving around only their hyper-ethnocentrist hyper-superstitious worldview,, and the resulting primitive behaviorism at some long ago time in the far past, then as is proven to be common over time it mutated, changed, was added onto with religious syncretisms and cultural diffusions from other people’s religions/beliefs/myths and fables and then mutating some more etc. And so the word “religion” then has lost all meaning and relevance, whatever is really going on behind everything is just way, way, way, larger, more real, sensible and important than all these puny primitive mutating myths and in many cases absolutely absurd ridiculous man-made so-called “religions”.

Actually, the new on the scene Yahweh-Jehovah tribal deity allegedly told the Moses character lots of things, and I mean lots and lots and lots of things and laws…supposedly, but the really great thing is that by selective cherry picking, abstract ideas conceptualizing and then topped off by personal invented rationalizations and ad hoc theories-theologies people can just pick to follow the bits and parts they like, or hate the least, and then just throw the rest into the garbage or into the Red Sea like a sack of bloody blemished goat meat or a disobedient slave, and on top of that they can even pretend they’re not Jewish living in the Bronze Age and Iron Age deserts, cherry picking magical hocus pocus powers shenanigans is awesome.

For more very easy to understand related information see also;









The apostle-witches and prophets of god doing their stuff with holy spirit magical thinking miracles and glorious fraudsterism for the Zion temple in their souls and future immortal zombification adventure.
More holy spirit filled apostle-wiches of god and jesus doing their stuff raising the powers from the sewage abyss and saving many souls.
And remember what the prophet and apostolic-witch savior of America and the entire free world says, for your offer of 2,500 dollars you get 22 buckets plus a bonus of 6 ADDITIONAL BUCKETS!, for a total of 28 BUCKETS PEOPLE! That’s 8 years of doomsday rapture-food buckets yumminess and real broccoli people! (Even though the guy who’s quoting Ezekiel is way, way, way out of context cherry picking and slyly fabulizing because it’s actually from an OT quote concerning the author’s time alleged to be around 585 BCE and it’s actually and specifically only about people living in Jerusalem and Israel during his time throwing all their silver and gold into the streets during the destruction of the temple and city at the start of the Babylonian captivity, i.e. – he’s not referring to anything far off in any future world time or even any place outside of Jerusalem and Israel, nice try scammer you don’t fool me but it will probably still sell more rapture-food buckets for god’s prophet apostle Jimbo anyway which is the main thing). Plus that guy Mark Blitz and John Hagee are the guys who discovered the glorious Blood Moon which is even the very first hocus pocus astrological dark blood magic Blood Moon that Adam and the snake and Jonah saw people! Glo-Ry! thank god for his Yahwehism-Jehovahism doomsday rapture-food blessings. Watch out the rice is HOT and just look at the steam!, listen to the glorious sound of the rice flowing into the tub and just look at the broccoli, just look at the broccoli people!, just throw your gold and silver into the streets of Jerusalem already just like the guy said and order your buckets now while supplies last!, but only after you dig the latrine, FOR CRIPE’S PETE’S SAKE WE’VE GOT TO START DIGGING THE LATRINE NOW PEOPLE!.
See below for very important public service announcement that will ensure that multi-purpose buckets of yummy rapture-food only goes to the elect prophets and apostles-witches as foretold by someone somewhere probably.
Got demon?, then get rid of it before you order your food buckets, the last thing the world needs is demons walking around with full stomaches full of nefarious demonic energy and vitamins like a Jerry Springer Show hopped up on demons spectacle, see how relieved the people are after realizing their demon is gone and they’re now able to order yummy rapture-food buckets in peace and glory, exorcise the demon before ordering the rapture-food buckets people (I can’t really tell if they’re full of the holy ghost or a demon or if the holy ghost is a demon and vice versa, but the important thing is that the multi-purpose yummy rapture-food buckets get sold thus saving the entire free world which next time will be demon-free probably, enjoy the demon-free yummy rapture-food buckets in glory now Brenda! Hallelujaha!).
Numerous evidences of real Men and Women holy apostle-witches of the biblical Yahweh-Jehovah God and Jesus’ very own shekels temple prophets amazing many with the holy ghost risen from the sewage abyss and saving many American souls and the entire free world from the stinky knobby-kneed, pointy-eared devil ghoul, the Lord’s great blood magic voodoo kingdom empire will be the new Jerusalem eternally just as written in his Book of Lies and the unworthy unbelieving heretical shekels will be thrown into the Egyptian Lake of Fire just as foretold by some guy somewhere before the days the earth was even put on its pillars, Glo-Ry!.
Another true Man of Yahweh-Jehovah and Jesus’ very own handpicked American apostle prophet saving many souls and saving America and the entire free world for the great blood magic voodoo empire of Jerusalem with the holy ghost risen from the sewage abyss for an immortal temple shekel blessings kingdom just as written in the glorious dubious Book of Lies. Not even one unblemished goat was boiled in its own mother’s milk just as prophesied in the books by someone since the days of Noah’s and Abraham’s sheep and tents.
Actual live undeniable irrefutable proof footage of one of Yahweh-Jehovah’s handpicked diabolical necromantic hocus pocus prophet apostle-witches performing wondrous miraculous mind control brainwashing healings to believers and in Jesus’ name anointed healing and gabbing powers miracles to believers, and even banishing the demons back to hell just as the prophets and apostles of old in the Book of Lies, and so the temple shekels faith seeds did verily persevere and will grow forth in Zion Jerusalem in abundance for the believers in the future blood magic kingdom with the shekels faith seeds from the believers which will grow as wheat and a giant fig tree across the world unto the heavens producing more miraculous fruit, this irrefutable proof of glorious holy ghost glory in his living name and Jesus’ words name is undeniable proof in Jesus’ proven predictions and Yahweh-Jehovah’s name (praise his name and let the believers believe in the victory of his power living glory miracles and holy ghost anointing shenanigans miracles as a proof of his name and the living glory of his name’s power’s word name, you have seen the lame walk, the blind see, the deaf hear, you have seen the sick dance, the lepers de-lepered and the living power of the glory holy ghost has made them believe and be anointed in truth and as a living power healings victory witness to the world and name even unto Zion and Midian and among the Edomites and Canaanites and probably the Moabites too), and all the anointed by the holy ghost believers were amazed by the power and glory in living abundance and truth, the lord’s apostle and his anointed miraculous gabbing powers as a witness to believers in his name and with the present descending as a pigeon holy ghost power and glory being seen by many and many were amazed just as in the days of Mahershalalhashbaz, Zerubbabel and the prophets of Jerusalem and other apostles, in his name and the present floating living holy ghost’s name the believers rejoice in the unexplainable healings miracles proofs in his name because they were anointed and the power and glory were seen by many and many believed and were healed as a witness to his living praise name. Glo-Ry let the believers rejoice in the living holy ghost shenanigans glory and spoken in tongues necromantical healings hocus pocus promises that were accomplished only through the miraculous power and glory of his words and name and the faith shekel seeds living words name that were sprouted in his name that healed the believers just as promised in the living glory and name powers miracles name spoken by believers as a witness proof of the holy ghost and his power and glory Yahweh-Jehovah names words living glory power healings miracles just as in the days of Balaam’s donkey and Jonah powers living words name for his shekels seeds temple glory, YOU CAN’T DENY BECAUSE YOU HAVE SEEN WITH YOUR VERY OWN EYEBALLS THAT OVER 500 PEOPLE WERE THERE WITNESSING THE DESCENDING HOLY GHOST NAME HEALING MIRACLES AND THAT’S THE LIVING POWER OF THE NAME AND LORD’S GLORY HEALING POWER OF YAHWEH-JEHOVAH’S LIVING WORD HEALING NAME FLOWING THE HOLY GHOST GLORY HEALING THROUGH YOU AND DESCENDING UPON THE BELIEVERS WHO JOYFULLY EXCLAIM “GLORY HOSANNA WE ARE HEALED BY APOSTLE BROTHER COPELAND AND HIS LORD’S LIVING WORD’S GLORY HOCUS POCUS POWER WORD NAME JUST AS WRITTEN IN THE BOOK OF LIES, AND YOU HAVE SEEN THEM HEALED ALSO AND WITNESSED THE GLORIOUS POWER NAME HEALINGS MIRACLES!”(seriously though, these people are just one small step away from drinking the kool-aid and that’s not a good thing).
You balding-demons we cast you out and back to hell in the name of the word power and lord’s word name glory to persecute believers no more! Faith shekels seeds temple accounts I call you well and healed! Behold you unbelieving brainwashed skeptics demons and unbelieving fools demons with no faith in the glorious name and power word name hocus pocus miracles powers truth witnessed by many, lo and woe to you nefarious liars against the glorious word and words of the name and the word’s power name and the many witnessing miraculous glory holy ghost power word names which demons refuse to believe, a power word name of the lord and living holy ghost which makes faith grow and healing miracles grow and the growing hair grow as a fig tree in the sight of the name of the mighty power and the believers rejoice hallelujah to the word name of hosts and his faith shekels seeds temple of glory and truth and living powers witnessed right before your eyes just as promised in the glorious inerrant Book of Lies and by the desert sorcerer Jesus the skylord of Zion (even you, yes even you could have blessed strong and even much stronger brown hair, ache-free joints and magical holy ghost gabbing powers living truths just like apostle-witch Kenneth Copeland who has been blessed and approved by Yahweh-Jehovah and Jesus and Abraham as a blood magic sorcery prophet-apostle fabulist model of true righteous holy faith-filled glory pleasing to the lord and an example for others to follow in the word name hocus pocus (Amen! Glo-Ry! Hallelujah! Raise your hands above and feel the holy ghost pigeon descending from the ceiling into your brain transforming it into a sheep’s brain and you into a holy blessed healed sheep believer right before your very eyeballs), if you only had the necromantical faith and grecian formula blessings directly from the 7th heaven’s glorious nefarious Yahweh-Jehovah tribal throne and footstool, all things are possible with the holy ghost blood magic sorcery powers lord word name glory charlatanism after all, hallelujah), yet you are still skeptics brainwashed from believing the proven mighty wonders truth and word name miracles faith living truth witnessed by many who were healed and blessed unto the ends of the earth, just as Abraham the travelling Babylonian sorcerer prince and the Zoroastrian magi prophets who were blessed with great healings by the glorious nefarious Yahweh-Jehovah and his other personality Satan-Azazel who is also him and so thus also spake the truths and performed great signs and living power word wonders against the Amalekites, Midianites, Moabites, Edomites and Canaanites, not even the famous 101 six-toed and six-fingered Nephilim could deny these things they saw and were amazed, not since the days that Noah drank his wine and Jonah lived in the fish did such blessings from the holy living ghost present a power word name glory for his name and word as the hocus pocus miracles seen today and amazing many…let the faith shekels word name glory power living seeds grow!, Glo-Ry!
Undeniable evidence of another of Yahweh-Jehovah’s handpicked favorite blood magic voodoo prophet apostolic-witches saving American souls for Jesus with the powers of the holy ghost risen from the sewage abyss and speaking with miraculous tongues gabbing powers of holy righteousness glory, many souls have been saved and are going to heavenly new Jerusalem to be immortal and further temple shekels seeds for the kingdom shall be glorified as a new oil lamp and golden unblemished heifer such as in the days of Adam and Mahershalalhashbaz, Glo-Ry!
When you become an official lord’s apostle-witch with the holy ghost gabbing powers you will learn how to get rid of serpentine pernicious mildew problems (and perhaps even persecuting stubborn baked-on grease, demonic ring around the bathtub and carpet odors curses and leprosy problems etc) by using just the book of Deuteronomy magic (any other nifty magic tricks in Deuteronomy there ol’ charlatan ol’ apostle-witch chap?), as well as how to magically escape planes full of deadly demons, how to donate more shekel seeds faster so that Jesse can see Jesus faster and get a new plane, and how to get your very own “Miracles Happen” magic blanket that will magically make all your bills and mortgages disappear…like magic practically, you can also put in bingo cards too for bingo miracles (and how to become one of the best elite professional beggars ever in the history of the world of course). #hallelujah #glory #miracleshappenblanket #mildewbiblemagic #donatemorefaster #demonplanes #1000shekelseedsnow #silversolutionpersecution
The body parts warehouse exists, guaranteed by Yahweh-Jehovah’s very own prophet apostle-witches and that’s a fact.
Yahweh-Jehovah’s very own godly Jesus apostles with the holy ghost visions and heavenly secrets bringing in the great blood magic voodoo kingdom to Jerusalem and beyond. #heavenlyvisions #biblevisions #yahwehjesusvisions #unblemishedgoatsfullofeyeballs #magicalfruit #totallynotcults #notbrainwashed
This one I added because it’s the holy hocus pocus Jewish gematria bible truths I mentioned earlier, which unequivocally proves that you are a potato, and that the cosmos verily truly are ruled by the perfect great universal sacred 7-eyed octopus goat (the all-seeing sacred geometrical 7-eyed unblemished octopus goat since before even the Sumerian Babylonian Garden of Eden) and the 7 Shining Ones from beyond Venus-Lucifer divided by π (Pi) multiplied by 7 plus the Moon (or also known as (x + 1)2 = x2 xPluto – y2 +7 Venus-Lucifers x 2x + y2 +Moon), therefore the entire bible and all of it’s contradictions, failed predictions, primitive blood magic sorcery, Zoroastrian and Babylonian cosmology, astrotheology, talking snakes, stopping the earth rotation and absurd fables are not only true…it’s supertrue, it’s the biblical truth and undeniable proof that you can’t deny, plus the circumference of the Moon times 7 Plutos diameters.
These last few included videos are for the benefit of the reader, and only just so the reader can’t blame me for leaving that icky religious cults and delusional sects aftertaste in your mouth and that apocalyptic Yahwehism-Jehovahism slime on your body from the mentioned hocus pocus fables, the primitive tribal Yahwehism-Jehovahism theologies nonsense, the various biblical Abrahamic mind control blood magic death cults sectarian apocalyptic rubbish and their pathological obsessive deranged “Pretend World” psychoses, the Bronze/Iron Age deserts primitive mega-ethnocentrist sectarian thought patterns and self-hypnosis mental disorder behaviorisms, the fabricated abstract concepts contradictory fables, mythomanias and cosmologies and the just plain various bullshitism, I’m just the messenger and “Ring of the Hyperboreans” in no way supports the various claimed Yahwehism-Jehovahism infanticides, genocides, threats and promises of cannibalism, terrorism, ethnic cleansing, slavery or eternal tortures, and so will likewise in no way be held responsible for disseminating or supporting bullshitism aftertaste or necromantical voodoo blood magic slime residue. The reader after viewing any video will not be required to believe that every single character, event, quote and plot theme is absolute 100% real and true or else their eternal existence is in danger of the eternal burning worms bbq. squishing and pitchforking punishments by angels and incessant never-ending torturous choir music and ghastly eternal trumpets tortures etc.


And The Day After Yahweh-Jehovah God Was Made He Said…”Do Not Do As The Hyperboreans, For I Don’t Know If They Exist” (It’s Sort Of Stupid That Way)…aka Birth Of The Iron Age Yahwehism Blood Magic Death Cult

Basically, back in OT biblical times during the Bronze Age and Iron Age, everybody in the deserts was inventing, trading, sharing and getting gods all over the place…”You get a god!, and you get a god!, and hey you there you get a god too!…everybody gets a god!”. However some gods were warrior deities, some were volcano gods and/or storm gods, some were a god of a particular mountain, some gods were married and some were even women, and some such as the new on the scene biblical Yahweh-Jehovah eventually changed their names (primarily from “El” which will be explained later) and progressively mutated thanks to the priests, gurus and scribes who were inventing him and applying various Thanosian powers, failed predictions and long-winded speeches, knowing this let’s take a brief look at who was who back in them Bronze-Iron Age magical hocus pocus Levant deserts times and see if those gods are really still around today as some proclaim and insist or were they really even real ever at all in the first place, i.e. – are they really or really not?, and who exactly are “they” really supposed to be anyway?

This brief blog post was some interesting information I came across which is connected to and explores further a few things I mentioned at my first post on this blog at “National Security Alert: Foreign Telescamvangelists, Cults, Sects“. Namely, about the real Bronze Age and Iron Age origins of later Abrahamic religions and their various cosmological views and worldviews, their mutating abstract concepts, primitive behaviorisms, desert blood magic and legends and mythologies etc. Things, evidences and truths that are never mentioned or discussed in front of pews and especially by televangelists to their mesmerized audiences and minions fans.

In this instance just about the earliest evidences that the Jewish tribal Yahweh-Jehovah God is proven to be just religious syncretism fiction and mythologies (not surprisingly and quite common in those lands and times of flat earths, talking animals, world’s best hocus pocus magicians and no internets), but also originally was married, see Yahweh and his Asherah links to find out more. (According to all the known facts and evidences most probably being invented and born into existence and then joining an already existing deities pantheon around the 9th century BCE in ancient Canaan as a local tribal warrior deity/storm god (as well as a volcano god), which explains this post title, although “…For I Don’t Know..”Or Care”..If They Exist” could also apply, because it simply had no interest or clearly didn’t even know anything whatsoever, about any people or nations or anything happening on the planet outside a 250 km radius from Jerusalem, and why would this be?…very simply because from the very start of the stories and narratives it was a completely 100% ethnocentric tribal deity, that is the facts ipso facto, see included map below)…

…because you have to admit it’s pretty hard to be taken seriously as a god of the world and planet and universe if you only hang and float around and vacation from your throne only in the exact same small area all the time and absolutely nowhere else…ever, and on top of that to strangely show up only occasionally as a puff of smoke in a traveling tent in the desert to mainly require and enjoy the aromas of numerous burnt animals sacrifices, when not smiting Israelites and foreigners back and forth that is. Basically, according to the written texts sources, then the Jesus character’s skydaddy really doesn’t come across as all that impressive, all-wise, all-powerful, all-knowing and definitely not omnipresent, instead he/it comes across much more like a Bronze Age-Iron Age locally invented tribal deity, which is precisely the case as will be unequivocally shown.

Yep, surely shocking probably to most pew potatoes who nod and agree about stuff being told and not even knowing who, when, why or where the stuff originates from and most of the time what it even really means and who it was actually really meant for, happy-clappy televangelist supporters and many others who probably think all the biblical stories are actually real history and verified facts, real magical superheroes and real hocus pocus blood magic shenanigans and abstract concepts intended for you the reader and every other person on the planet, because nothing could be further from the truth or more absurd.

Yep, just like the fact that most believers would be shocked to know, such as the fact that the “Satan” character people think they know about today, actually started out as a personality trait of the Yahweh-Jehovah God and as his personal friend helper, then turned into an angel agent who personally works for and carries out punishments and suffering “for” God with his full support, then as a position of authority to be an accuser and adversary of humans as “god’s personal prosecuting attorney”, later he becomes a metaphor and symbolic representation of innate human qualities, and only much later still he is transformed into a powerful separate entity with a powerful kingdom and armies of his own angels who took his side (because the greatest minds and thinkers in history are always in the minority not the majority as the saying goes), having his own vast realms and even authority as Lord of the Earth and visible world (eventually mutated over time and given horns, cloven hooves feet, pointy tail, red face, knobby knees, pointy chin and ears, goatee, bad breath, pitchfork, echoing laugh and sometimes even a nefarious cape etc), the included video below explains more about that. And that even the very first time that Satan appears as a proper noun and an actual separate entity in the OT text during the book of Job fable, he is in fact NOT an enemy but is instead a helper and teammates with the Yahweh-Jehovah deity character because they are in fact both on the same team (the original Hebrew in Job 1:6 makes this unequivocal where Satan is described as clearly being one of the “70 Sons of God”, aka the Divine Council…”Now it fell upon a day, that the sons of God came to present themselves before the Lord, and Satan was among them”, however this is before he was mutated by later anonymous writers and inventors by starting to grow horns, a tail, pointy ears and cloven hooves feet etc, and used as an integral focal point and important selling point for televangelist’s tax-free faith seed shekels donations and expense accounts especially, and books and DVDs also of course, see also previous post excerpt for shocking detailed proof).

Well, just like that case, most believers would likewise be shocked to know that the “Yahweh” god was already a known worshipped deity by many tribal groups in ancient Canaan going back many centuries before the new on the scene Israelites came into existence. Actually, a large number of biblical scholars, researchers and archaeologists from over the last century especially agree and have put forward undeniable evidences that the origins of the Israelites is from Canaanite origins, which is really not surprising and today is the majority consensus view even by many Jewish researchers and scholars. The culture of the earliest Israelite settlements in the land of Canaan and their cult-objects are clearly those of the Canaanite god El, also in the Hebrew bible it is the name El (Elyon, Elohim, El Roi, El Shaddai and sometimes Baal and even others) used many times when talking about their god Yahweh-Jehovah, it all points to the very evident and not surprising very common proven process of Canaanite religious syncretism.

“El” was the original first god of the Israelites before Yahweh, it is El, the head of the Canaanite pantheon, whose name forms the basis of the name “Israel” which literally means “fighter against god” or “the one who fights/wrestles against god” (and many other names such as Gabri-el, Ezeki-el, Immanu-el, Beth-el, Samu-el, Ishma-el, Michae-el, El-isha, Nethani-el, Haza-el and many other names and words) and none of the Old Testament patriarchs, the tribes of Israel, the Judges, or the earliest monarchs, have a Yahwistic theophoric name (i.e. – one incorporating the name of Yahweh).

Before Yahweh-Jehovah was invented circa. 9th century BCE, El, aka “King of the Gods”, was the main chief god worshipped by the Israelites in the OT texts, as well as by a number of Canaanite and Levant region tribes and peoples, and the origins of El are from ancient Mesopotamia (which would mean that today’s Abrahamic religions main personal cosmic genie skydaddy is actually ultimately Mesopotamian, before mutating to the Zoroastrian inspired Yahweh tribal deity, seen above sitting on his throne as usual).

Since Israelites were indigenous Canaanites, we know they shared the same culture which would mean the same gods also. In Canaan, the chief god was El. El’s wife was Asherah, and his sons include Ba’al and Anut. The Canaanite pantheon is well-understood from the discovery of the Ugaritic texts which are dated to 1300-1100 BCE (Interestingly, the texts describe a “redemption of the first-born son” practice which was to later be practiced by the Israelites also, aka pidyon haben mitzvah today). The Ugaritic texts also show that the later Paleo-Hebrew alphabet script was indistinguishable from and really just is the Phoenician script alphabet.

Scholarly and archaeological evidences show that Yahweh was originally a god of metallurgy in northwest Saudi Arabia (aka Midian), and was introduced to Israel in a five-stage process:

1 -Traditional Polytheism. The earliest Israelites worshipped creator god El, his wife Asherah, and his sons e.g., Baal.
2 – Incorporation. Yahweh was incorporated as a 2nd tier god in El’s pantheon.
3 – Elevation. Yahweh and El are identified as the same deity.
4 – Monolatrism. A new yahweh-only movement emerges, and the gods of the second tier are denied.
5 – Monotheism. Gods of other nations are denied, yahweh’s power is deemed universal in scope.

Exodus 15:3 – Yahweh is a man of war. Yahweh is his name.

A common way the Old Testament writers referred to Yawheh is “YHWH OF “HOSTS”. However the word used for that title is actually “tsaba” which in original context meaning and in translated modern context reading of the text more correctly equates to “armies”.

Isaiah 47:4 – Our Redeemer, Yahweh of Armies is his name, the Holy One of Israel

The fact is that the later Hebrew god name of “Yahweh“, in turn is based on the Tetragrammaton which is a four-letter word transliterated as YHWH. And that Yahweh was also an older name already being used by other deserts pagan religions peoples and it actually was just one of a number of major gods being worshipped in ancient Canaanite religions and throughout the Levant/Middle East, such as the Edomites and Midianites among some others, but later circa. 9th century BCE the Hebrews decided eventually to start making YHWH their own personal storm god and main personal warrior deity, eventually over time becoming their personal “national god of Israel”.

As mentioned, the oldest occurrence of this name is in the phrase “Shasu of yhw” in an Egyptian inscription from the time of Amenhotep III (1402–1363 BCE), the Shasu referring to the nomads from Midian and Edom in northern Arabia. The current consensus based on the known archaeological and paleographical textual evidences is therefore that Yahweh was a “divine warrior from the southern region from northern Arabia associated with Seir, Edom, Paran and Teman”, and probably introduced by the travellers along the caravan routes from northern Arabia (Edom, Midian and Moab) towards Egypt (Even the OT text unequivocally admits this: Habakkkuk 3:3 – “God came from Teman, and the Holy One from Mount Paran.”, Deuteronomy 33:2 – “Yahweh…rose from Seir unto them; He shined forth from mount Paran”), which would also largely explain why and when the Israelites decided to follow the Egyptian customs of circumcision, owning slaves and likewise enforcing pork prohibitions also (Although El would have still remained the most popular and supreme chief god of the Israelites and others in the lands of Canaan until the post-exilic period (537 to 430 BCE), see also Shasu of YWH and Yahwehism for some more interesting background tidbits).

Even in the OT mythology texts it is shown that “El” , aka “King of the Gods”, is the chief main deity among the ancient Israelites, but also among many other Canaanite and Levant region desert tribes and neighboring nations as well, and originating from ancient Mesopotamia. Yahweh also existed as a god among some tribes at the time and was known about but was a second tier god below El, aka known as the plural “Elohim”. Through later religious syncretism the Yahweh god became equated to El even taking on many of his personal attributes, his wife consort, characteristics and various powers. El was regarded as the highest deity of the ancient semitic pantheon and revered as the Father of all the Elohim together with his consort Asherah. Later still they renamed El as Yahweh and made him their national warrior god, and storm god at times also. So in the making of Yahweh, the probabilities and written textual and material remains evidences very strongly suggest and point to the original cult of YHWH being a god of metallurgy originating among some Midianite semi-nomadic desert copper smelters between the Bronze and Iron Age and was not even worshipped by Jews, not until centuries later through assimilation with El (who was originally Mesopotamian as shown), and then including some other adapted attributes and characteristics from other gods and their mythologies, aka religious syncretism, and then only after the post-exilic period (537 to 430 BCE) becoming pushed by the priestly elites and at times enforced by leaders to become the only national deity.

However, it was a long process that took place over centuries, numerous biblical scholars strongly believe that Asherah at one time was worshipped as the consort of Yahweh. There are references to the worship of numerous deities throughout the books of Kings: Solomon builds temples to many deities and Josiah is reported as cutting down the statues of Asherah in the temple Solomon built for Yahweh (2 Kings 23:14). Josiah’s grandfather Manasseh had erected one such statue (2 Kings 21:7), as just a few examples. Between the tenth century BCE and the beginning of their exile to Babylon in 586 BCE, polytheism was quite normal throughout Israel. Worship solely of Yahweh became established only after the Babylonian exile, and possibly only as late as the time of the Maccabees (2nd century BCE). That is when monotheism became universal among the Jews with the return of the priestly elites and scribes along with their new theological and textual reformulations and new adapted concepts and ideas from the Babylonian exile. Competing cults were banished and all sacrifice rituals were eventually centralized and unified in Jerusalem, i.e. – the process of a centuries-long deceptive trickery-theism and concoctions were then well on their way.

“Yahweh and his Asherah” is written in Phoenician script across the top of this eighth-century BCE drawing on a ceramic pithos, or storage jar, from Kuntillet ‘Ajrud in the eastern Sinai, including the phrases “Yahweh of Samaria and his Asherah” and “Yahweh of Teman and his Asherah. The four-tiered cult stand found at Tanaach is thought to represent Yahweh and Asherah, with each deity being depicted on alternating tiers. Image credit: Dr. Ze’ev Meshel and Avraham Hai/Tel Aviv University Institute of Archaeology.

Inscriptions were also found at the Kuntillet Ajrud site on plaster walls of the building, taken together, the inscriptions found at the site contain references to the names of several gods besides Yahweh and Asherah, including El and Baal, a transcription below…

…] second time /years[…
]in earthquake. In addition, when El shines forth in the [heights. Y]HW[H…
] R The mountains will melt, the hills will crush […
] earth. The Holy One over the gods […
] prepare (yourself) [to] bless Baʿal on a day of battle […
] to the name of El on the day of bat[tle…

Numerous scholars and overwhelming textual and archaeological evidences clearly show that much of the Old Testament was written only after the first destruction of the Jerusalem temple and post-exilic period (537 to 430 BCE), i.e. – especially after the priestly elites and their scribes and followers returned from the Babylonian captivity. At that time is when new ideas were defined, written information omitted and redefined, many foreign new ideas, beliefs, customs and concepts that were already “in the air” for many centuries among neighboring tribes and peoples suddenly appeared in the OT literature that was not there before…adapting and mutating borrowings from the older Zoroastrianism religion, from Mesopotamian religions, Egyptian and other Levant and Canaanite pagan religions, which is just what the first original Israelites really were anyway and which the vast majority of biblical scholars, including even many Jewish scholars, agree, Originally just one tribe of the Canaanites yet sharing the same gods…and names of their gods, and yes even and particularly….Yahweh.

Ezekiel 20:26 – “I defiled them through their gifts—the sacrifice of every firstborn—that I might fill them with horror so they would know that I am the LORD.

The documentary model developed originally in the 1870s, identifies that different authors – the Jahwist, Elohist, Deuteronomist, and the Priestly source – were responsible for editing the various OT stories from a polytheistic religion into those of a monotheistic religion…Yahwehism-Jehovahism (all the couch church television viewers and pew audiences and fans are probably going to be shocked now when their speeching guru tells them the blasphemous abomination information at the next sermon or fake miracles heal-a-thon, it may even affect the various temples coffers).

Because only after the return from the Babylonian captivity is actually when the OT was written (the first 5 books were not written by any Moses character which is proven in the text itself and who is also absent from any and all contemporaneous and historical sources, including the hocus pocus magics)…It is at this time suddenly that the up to then known Wife of Yahweh…out…Dualism and eternally at war cosmic battling deities…in…Wandering demons/spirits, Egyptian eternal lake of fire punishments…in…future apocalyptic victory over the planet…in…astrotheology, talking serpents, gardens, dragons, world flood legend, future raised immortal zombifications and zapping-melting of enemy Non-Jewish gentile nations with fire…in…in…in…etc…etc…etc. The equivalent of Bronze/Iron Age fabulist charlatan televangelists actually just without the suits, microphones and 24 hour telephone hope and wish lines.

Numerous biblical scholars and critics, (already starting in the first century by various writers and commentators but especially in the last 100 years as a specifically studied and examined topic), after careful study of the written OT text have concluded that the morals of the Jewish Yahweh-Jehovah God deity character (who is also the Christian god and Jesus’ skydaddy supposedly and/or is Jesus or whatever, as well as being the Muslim, Baháʼí, Mormon and Jehovah’s Witnesses god) are quite simply appalling and that it can even be considered as a “Moral Monster”. They conclude that it is very obviously evident that the OT Yahweh morality and moral ideals are primitive and barbaric and are just another example of the ancient Middle East’s harsh, morally-problematic social milieu, not unlike other contemporaneous and older religions during the same general time period and areas (Bronze Age-Iron Age-Early Common Era). And that It is also evident in the text that the new emerging “Mosaic Law” are not in any way new illuminating laws or just ideals introduced by a skydaddy to do away with or replace already present inferior societal norms and practices already common in ancient Canaanite traditions, but that they are merely only attempts by the Deuteronomist elite (reflecting the economic needs and social status of the priestly caste and including importantly the local landowning aristocrats as many of the laws pertain specifically to property and possessions…i.e. – coveting another’s or the master’s oxen, donkeys, slaves, camels etc, how to manage foreign and native slaves and when to severely beat them or punish them by death etc), to regulate and legitimize already tolerated and accepted social and political structures and societal norms (warfare, ethnic cleansing, polygamy, patriarchalism, bloodthirsty massacres of men, women and children, child abuse, slavery, punishments by death, as well as promises of future cannibalism, eternal fire torment and the annihilation destruction of the overwhelmingly vast majority of humanoids populations that have ever lived etc), thereby permitting the various older primitive barbaric social structures to continue but simultaneously getting the official “Yahweh seal of approval”, and so in the process the “Moral Monster” falls far short of any sort of new morals or divine ideal, but is instead just wearing a new robe and sandals.

And you have to admit it’s very, very strange, odd and yes even yet another example of a contradiction (among numerous contradictions evident in the biblical literature) that when the returned elitist priests and scribes continued their writings, that the “dualism” of a Yahweh with a wife/queen/consort Asherah was a big huge problem for them suddenly, but the newly devised “dualism” of 2 battling deities in the cosmos and heavens for control of the planet and universe was quite acceptable. I mean they give their Yahweh many times attributes of a male, as well as refer to him as “he”, “he” has this and that or did such and such, “he” smites, “he” is angry, “he” kills, massacres, destroys, floods, “he” creates the evil, “he” has sons even (eventually even Jesus supposedly which would mean he lived motherless in heaven for millions and billions and trillions and gazillions of years, just hanging around bearded old guys in heaven I guess floating around listening to trumpets and choirs all the time, all the angels are a “he” also apparently, I’m not sure about all those floating chubby cherubim winged babies in the paintings though who the heck knows). But doesn’t everyone and every animal on the planet need a mother to be born? I know I did I don’t know about you (Oh sure there are some animals and organisms on the planet that can reproduce themselves, mainly bacterias, hydras and some other anthoathecatas, various worms, fungi and water microorganisms, so god is like a bacteria, fungus or worm then?).

But those priests, elites and scribes coming back from Babylon with their newly adapted ideas and scrolls apparently thought that was ludicrous and blasphemous now or just not cool enough for their new emerging national god, and they also had to come up with a scapegoat excuse to blame for all the evil and things that they didn’t agree with that was going on, it appears “he” now had to be something more like what the Zoroastrians had all along (they had to give their Yahweh an upgrade to compete and be more powerful to impress the masses, sort of like a revamp and refurbishment of a bus or jet plane as an analogy)…except now after adding some religious syncretism into the mix their newer and improved Yahweh national god would instead zap and melt the Babylonians and Zoroastrian Persians, Egyptians and just about everyone else on earth (including the Greeks and Romans afterwards), and then that instead they the Israelites will be the future victorious ruling risen zombies priest kings of the planet favored by Yahweh (coincidentally, or not coincidentally actually, after this time is when the bickering Sadducees and Pharisees sects appear for the first time, with the following centuries of competition and conflict between them in deciding what the various official Jewish political, social, and religious roles and beliefs should be for the people and nation). However according to the known facts and even their own written biblical sources the opposite always kept happening time and time again (Maybe Yahweh needed yet another theological upgrade and magic powers refurbishment perhaps? or maybe the new temple should have rightfully been built more fancier with water falls and revolving door perhaps?, possibly, the best real god should have the best real temple after all, everyone knows that it’s common sense).

Even though the snake/serpent in the mythological fable is really just a wise snake and there’s absolutely no hint of the text implying anything otherwise (and the fable where later Satan and God are on the same team torturing Job, Satan says he was just “walking” around on the earth but snakes moving around on their stomaches simply can’t walk), but just to make some people happy for the sake of argument…

At my previous introductory post I already showed how the ancient Croatian Hyperboreans already existed for many 10’s of thousands of years on the European continent before the OT and Abrahamic religions world and universe even came into existence, they already lived during the Upper Paleolithic, Mesolithic and Bronze Age periods in Europe, they had functioning societies, manufacturing of tools and artistic objects, they charted the skies and cosmos to know the seasons and moon cycles and to know when the rivers rise and they had their deities pantheon during the LGM Ice Age and after the beginning of the Holocene period, and they even left behind many proofs and evidences…archaeological remains, cave paintings, pottery, mammoth bones carvings, bronze and iron artifacts and much more, and even they were intelligent enough to know that they had a mother and likewise females were also part of their deities pantheon, it only made sense. I’ll return to this topic a little more after the main included information from https://mythologymatters.wordpress.com

Yahweh’s Divorce from the Goddess Asherah in the Garden of Eden

Hebrew Bible scholars have long recognized that the writer who penned the story of Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden and much other narrative in the first 5 books of the Hebrew Bible (called the Pentateuch, or Torah) had a distinctly anti-Canaanite agenda, and that his anti-Canaanite polemic started in his Eden story. Focusing on this helps us to decipher the meaning of that story, as I have stressed in my new book, The Mythology of Eden, and in talks that I’ve given on the subject at scholarly conferences.

This author, known as the Yahwist (because he was the first author of the Hebrew Bible to use the name Yahweh for God), most clearly set out his anti-Canaanite views at the beginning of his version of the Ten Commandments, in Exodus 34:12-15, where Yahweh warns the Hebrews against associating with the Canaanites, intermarrying with them, and worshipping their deities; Yahweh also orders the Hebrews to tear down Canaanite altars, pillars, and asherahs (wooden poles (stylized trees) in sanctuaries that were the cult object of their goddess Asherah (in Hebrew pronounced ah-shei-RAH) and symbolized her). Against this background, the anti-Canaanite polemic in the Eden story becomes apparent, especially that against the goddess Asherah, who at the time was widely viewed by Israelites as Yahweh’s wife or consort. As official Israelite religion trended toward monotheism, the other local deities had to be eliminated (Asherah in particular), and Yahweh appropriated their powers and functions. Insofar as this process affected Asherah, I call this “Yahweh’s Divorce,” and the proceedings began in the Yahwist’s Eden story.

Before the rise of Israel, Asherah was the wife of El, the head god of the Canaanite pantheon. According to the archeological evidence, the people who became Israelites were mostly native Canaanites who settled in the hills of what is now the West Bank, while it seems that small but influential groups also migrated there from the south in the Midian (in and around the Araba Valley in Sinai). As the Bible itself testifies, that is where Yahweh veneration appears to have originated, and, in a process that in this respect resonates with the Moses story, the migrants introduced Yahweh to the native Canaanites who were becoming Israelites. Over time, El declined and merged into Yahweh. As part of that process, Yahweh inherited Asherah from El as his wife.

The Hebrew Bible refers to Asherah directly or indirectly some 40 times, always in negative terms (so she must have been a challenge). Most references are indirect, to the asherah poles that symbolized her, but a number of them clearly enough refer directly to the goddess Asherah (e.g., Judges 3:7; 1 Kings 15:13; 1 Kings 18:19; 2 Kings 21:7; 2 Kings 23:4-7; 2 Chron. 15:16). Evidently she was part of traditional official Israelite religion, for an asherah pole even stood in front of Solomon’s Temple for most of its existence, as well as in Yahweh’s sanctuary in Samaria. There is also much extra-biblical evidence of Asherah in Israel from the time of the judges right through monarchical times, including in paintings/drawings, pendants, plaques, pottery, (possibly) clay “pillar” figurines, cult stands, and in inscriptions. Several inscriptions specifically refer to “Yahweh and his Asherah [or asherah].” (It is not entirely certain whether the goddess herself or the asherah pole symbolizing her is being referenced here, but either way ultimately the goddess is meant, and she is being linked with Yahweh.)

The Yahwist and the other biblical writers could not accept the presence of this goddess as a deity in Israel, much less as the wife of Yahweh, who they specifically depicted in non-sexual terms. So they declared war on her, in part by mentioning her existence sparingly in the Bible, by referring to her and asherahs negatively when they did mention her, and by waging a polemic against her by allusions that would have been clear to the Yahwist’s audience. These tactics are apparent in the Eden story, from the kinds of symbols used and the trajectory of the narrative. These symbols include the garden sanctuary itself, the sacred trees, the serpent, and Eve, herself a goddess figure. In ancient Near Eastern myth and iconography, sacred trees, goddesses, and serpents often form a kind of “trinity,” because they have substantially overlapping and interchangeable symbolism and are often depicted together. Let’s examine each of these symbols briefly.

The Garden. Originally in the ancient Near East, the Goddess was associated with and had jurisdiction over vegetation and life, which she generated herself. People partook of the first crops (including fruit) as her bounty – indeed her body and her divinity – and set up her sanctuary with garden of crops for this purpose. Such a sacred garden sanctuary was “estate” over which she exercised jurisdiction. Examples include Siduri’s vineyard with a sacred tree in the Gilgamesh epic, Inanna’s garden precinct with sacred tree in Sumer, Calypso’s vineyard sanctuary in Homer’s Odyssey, and Hera’s Garden of the Hesperides. Garden sanctuaries of gods and kings evolved later, when religion became more patriarchal, sky gods came to dominate, and goddesses were substantially devalued. In the Eden story, Yahweh’s both creating the garden (i.e., life) and being in charge of it can be viewed as part of this process: There the Goddess (here Asherah) was eliminated from the garden sanctuary and from her functions there.

Sacred trees were thought to connect with the divine realms of both the netherworld and the heavens, and therefore were considered conduits for communicating with and experiencing the divine and themselves are charged with the divine force (thought of as “serpent power”; see below). In harmony with the seasons, trees embody the life energy and symbolize the generation, regeneration and renewal of life. Therefore, they are associated with the source of life, the Earth/Mother Goddess. Accordingly, sacred trees were venerated in Palestine in sacred sanctuaries known as “high places,” as means of accessing and experiencing divinity, principally the goddess Asherah. (Similarly, the divinity of the male deity was accessed through vertical stone pillars, e.g., the one set up by Jacob at Bethel.) In the Eden story, the two sacred trees of knowledge of good and evil and of life allude to this traditional role of sacred trees, but the meaning is turned upside down. In the story, Yahweh even creates the trees. In ordering Adam not to partake of the tree of knowledge of good and evil, by implication Yahweh was telling the audience not to venerate sacred trees in the traditional fashion. And in any event, the theretofore divine knowledge of good and evil that was acquired through eating the fruit is linked with Yahweh, not any goddess. And at the end of the story the tree of life is clearly designated as Yahweh’s, being guarded by his trademark symbols, the paired cherubim.

Serpents. In the ancient Near East, serpents had both positive and negative connotations, and in the Eden story the Yahwist played on each. In its positive aspect, the serpent represented the divine force itself, responsible for creation, life, and rebirth, as symbolized by its constant shedding of its skin. This and the fact that it lives within the earth (the netherworld) made for a natural association with the Mother Earth Goddess. As a result, the serpent was venerated as having divine powers and was used in rituals, including in marriage (to secure conception of children) and to maintain health. Serpents were also considered wise and sources of knowledge, and thus were used in divination. (The Hebrew noun for serpent (nāḥāš) connotes divination; the verb nāḥaš means to practice divination, and observe omens/signs.) Hence the serpent’s connection with transmission of the knowledge of good and evil in the Eden story. This “good” serpent was typically depicted in an upright or erect form, as in the case of the Egyptian erect cobra (in the illustration above), Moses’ bronze serpent on a pole, and the serpent on Asclepius’ staff (now the symbol of our medical profession).

But the serpent also was represented negatively as unrestrained divine power, which produces chaos, which is evil. Therefore, in creation myths the serpent/dragon represents the primordial chaos that must be overcome in order to establish the created cosmos (known as the “dragon fight” motif). This primordial chaos serpent is most often a serpent/dragon goddess (e.g., Tiamat in the Babylonian Enuma Elish) or her proxy (Typhon was the creation of Gaia). The serpent in this “evil” aspect is most often depicted horizontally. In the Eden story our author used this negative aspect, while parodying the traditional positive associations, which Yahweh appropriated. Thus, in the story, the serpent connoted chaos and symbolized the chaos in Eve’s heart as she deliberated. At the end of the story, Yahweh cursed the serpent and flattened its posture (compared with the upright/erect posture it had when talking with Eve). As a result, Yahweh was victorious over the serpent and chaos and, by implication the Goddess, in a mini version of the above-mentioned dragon fight motif. Bible scholars overwhelmingly agree that the serpent in the Eden story was not the Satan or the Devil character (nor was ever implied to be so rather just an animal), whose figure appeared much later in Judaism and Christianity and Islam. The chaos that this serpent represented existed even before the creation and before Yahweh created the serpent (which creation also conveys Yahweh’s superiority over it). The audience of the Eden story knew that some degree of chaos (evil) is naturally present in the fabric of the cosmos (and so too in humans), so no additional outside agency was needed to bring evil into being. Thus, the serpent was only a symbol of already existing evil, not its source.

The Goddess. As noted by numerous biblical scholars, the Goddess is also seen in the figure of Eve herself, the last figure in our trinity of tree-serpent-Goddess. In the Eden story she is given the epithet “the mother of all living,” an epithet like those given to various ancient near Eastern goddesses including Siduri, Ninti, and Mami in Mesopotamia and Asherah in Syria-Palestine. Eve’s actual name in Hebrew (ḥawwâ), besides meaning life (for which goddesses were traditionally responsible), is also likely wordplay on an old Canaanite word for serpent (ḥeva). The name of the goddess Tannit (the Phoenician version of Asherah) means “serpent lady,” and she had the epithet “Lady Ḥawat” (meaning “Lady of Life”), which is derived from the same Canaanite word as Eve’s name (ḥawwâ). At the end of the story, Eve is punished by having to give birth in pain, whereas goddesses in the ancient Near East gave birth painlessly. Further, in Genesis 4:1, Eve needs Yahweh’s help in order to become fertile and conceive, a reversal of the Goddess’ power and function. (Indeed, Eve is even created from Adam!, and very strangely and absurdly only after all the animals were deemed not a suitable partner for him) Adam’s only fault was “listening” to Eve in order to attain divine qualities. Here the Yahwist may be alluding to Goddess veneration, saying not to worship her. This seems to be one reason for the punishment consisting of woman’s subjugation to man in Genesis 3:16.

As a result of these events, by the end of the story Yahweh is supreme and in control of all divine powers and functions formerly in the hands of the Goddess, and Canaanite religion in general has been discredited. Yahweh is in charge of the garden (formerly the Goddess’ province), from which chaos has been removed. Sacred tree veneration has been prohibited and discredited, while Yahweh appropriates and identifies himself with the Tree of Life (see also Hosea 14:8, where Yahweh claims, “I am like an evergreen cypress, from me comes your fruit.”). The serpent has been vanquished, flattened, and deprived of divine qualities, and thus is not worthy of veneration, and enmity has been established between snakes and humans. The Goddess has been discredited, rendered powerless, and is eliminated from the picture and sent into oblivion. Yahweh’s divorce from her has been made final, at least in the author’s mind. But in fact she persisted, and her equivalents in the psyche inevitably have persisted to this day, as they must.

Sources and Bibliography

Becking, Bob, Dijkstra, Meindert, et al. Only One God? Monotheism in Ancient Israel and the Veneration of the Goddess Asherah. London: Sheffield Academic Press (2001).

Billing, Nils. Nut: The Goddess of Life in Text and Iconography. Uppsala: Akademitryck (2002).

Dever, William. Did God Have a Wife? Archaeology and Folk Religion in Ancient Israel. Grand Rapids, Michigan: Eerdmans (2005).

George, Arthur, and Elena George. The Mythology of Eden. Lanham, Maryland: Hamilton Books (2014).

Hadley, Judith. The Cult of Asherah in Ancient Israel and Judah: Evidence for a Hebrew Goddess. Cambridge, UK: Cambridge University Press (2000).

Keel, Othmar, and Christoph Uehlinger. God, Goddesses, and Images of God in Ancient Israel. Minneapolis: Fortress Press (1998).

Kikawada, Isacc. “Two Notes on Eve,” Journal of Biblical Literature, 91:33-37 (1972).

Olyan, Saul. Asherah and the Cult of Yahweh in Israel. Atlanta: Scholars Press (1988).

Patai, Raphael. The Hebrew Goddess. 3rd ed. Detroit: Wayne State University Press (1990).

Wallace, Howard. The Eden Narrative. Atlanta: Scholars Press (1985).

Godzilla, a Leviathan sea monster illustration from Old Testament text and an ancient Mesopotamian religious stone carving from circa. 2450 BCE, what’s up with that and the book of Revelation connection? Do telescamvangelists even know?

Just one more very eye-opening fact is that just like the previous points discussed about the origins of and the influencing factors of and the borrowed fables themselves into the Old Testament and Bible from other older pagan religions, including their abstract concepts, characters, astrotheology, deities pantheons, concepts of hell, resurrections, resurrecting saviour messiahs, spirits/demons, a Devil, “Dualism” concepts of a devil and other god being in eternal conflict etc, is just how oblivious and clueless most people are about these real factors and facts involved, these are all things imported into the Old Testament written sources by scribes that were originally ideas from other Mesopotamian, Sumerian, Zoroastrian, Egyptian and other Canaanite religions and their beliefs, and later still esoteric secret mysticism religions, gnosticism, Greco-Roman religions and Hellenistic Judaism philosophies and ideas etc. It’s really laughable and just plain pathetic when some fraudster prophet-wannabe thinks he/she knows prophetic meanings and then start their shtick on pulpits or behind desks and microphones and especially in their slick fakery DVDs and books (hardcover and paperback of course). And gullible believing people fall for it, even circling passages and underlining verses or sentences and all that like they know what they’re doing, thinking they’re onto something, onto the truth and revealed mysteries and godly supertruths. But it’s even more pathetic that all these things which they think are some inspired holy prophetic and new glorious god or heavenly wisdom secrets and holy news scoop hunches…..are in reality just much older pagan religions ideas, fables and wisdom secrets.

The Hebrew concept of “the universe” during the Old Testament Biblical superheroes times is actually the forerunner to those Flat Earth Theory people who are still around today, according to the Yahwehism-Jehovahism beliefs Earth was within a dome and the blue sky was even believed to be a wall of water floating in the atmosphere with literal pillars supporting the flat earth which had ends, rain was believed to be God tipping his rain jars and snow was kept in the snow storage houses, that earthquakes are caused by god’s anger, that there were no rainbows before the Noah superhero, that the Moon has a light of its own, that stars fall from the skies etc…etc…etc. Also according to their understanding and knowledge of the known world which consisted of mainly just the Levant, then in the corresponding map seen above Europe, Asia, Australia, North America and South America would be located in outer space somewhere and not on the flat earth disc, it’s pretty easy and plain to see that the newly concocted Yahweh-Jehovah tribal deity was just their “God of the Middle East” and without a doubt was never a God of the Danube, Alps, Carpathians, or Mississippi, Ural, Ganges rivers etc. However, even this wrong world view as well as many other biblical views, beliefs, events and legends characters actually directly derive from the ancient Mesopotamian religion, and even elements from ancient Egypt. i.e. – from the religious beliefs and practices of the civilizations of ancient Mesopotamia from since 3500 BCE, so it’s clear and strange, but not surprising, to see that the Hebrew Jehovah-Yahweh God gave secret news scoop tips to his writers to basically copy ancient pagan cosmological world views and religious beliefs and stories, adapt and personalize them and then pass them off as his own. Lots and lots of ideas, characters, legends, beliefs and views were borrowed from them also.
View of the “Holy Land/God’s Country” seen within the expanse of the “biblical universe”, the biblical universe where all the desert blood magic, suspension of disbelief and hocus pocus took place and very strangely the absolute only place on the entire planet where god liked to vacation, smite, kill and make failed predictions when not on his throne, the universe is highlighted in red (the people and nations living on the rest of the planet are basically just irrelevant NPC characters, or most likely just demons probably). If you read the bible without believing it, if you read it and realize it’s just another people’s national myths and folklore, just primitivism and a bunch of stories and mythologies written by obsessively superstitious people from the Bronze/Iron Age deserts – then it becomes increasingly apparent that they attributed the most circumstantial events and psychological traits to their god (aka “God of the Middle East”). After reading it you can then ask yourself does this sound familiar? Is this the same “real world” you live in or a world you could easily step into and just continue living and thinking and acting as usual alongside one of “their world” characters and their world thinking views and behaviorisms, or vice versa? (I guarantee if you did teleport there you would be stoned to death in no time just as god commanded), Or does it sound much more like fables and fiction characters? The bible and Abrahamic religions screams out loud of an ancient desert peoples who knew nothing of psychology, natural science, earth science, physics, astronomy, geography, coincidence, human fallibility and even cases of basic biology and hygiene, it’s a book that actually even celebrates ignorance in those fields, where anyone hearing voices was experiencing god talking and angels or demons under every rock and behind every bush. The writings and character’s quotes come across more as absurd kitsch comedic drama with a penchant for the distasteful and even warped demented side. Click open the image of earth for full view of the universe highlighted in red.

Like I said, now the reader might be wondering just what the heck Godzilla, a sea monster illustration from OT text sources and an ancient Mesopotamian religious stone carving from circa. 2450 BCE really does have to do with the Yahweh-Jehovah deity character, with the Old Testament and the Hebrew bible?, as well as the book of Revelation science-fiction novel, well I’m glad you asked because it’s much more all related than you probably think. Because it’s actually just yet another of many evidences that the newly appearing Yahweh-Jehovah deity character and Yahwehism-Jehovahism of the Hebrew bible is not something new or a newly appearing personal skydaddy supremo with all the perfect answers, laws, rules and the best most powerful smartest magical powers etc etc etc, but is instead just a borrowing of concepts and ideas from other older surrounding religions and their beliefs and legends (the whole Adam & Eve, Noah’s ark, creation narrative, wandering demons (originally Daemons/Daimons), the powerful Devil character and Dualism concepts, resurrections, circumcisions, dietary and slavery laws and eating pork prohibitions etc, already mentioned earlier). Because in this particular case in Psalm 74:14 right in the middle of God’s ordering of the sea and dry land, his establishing of the sun, moon, stars, and the seasons etc, we find another event…God destroying sea monsters!

The text excerpt reads…”…You divided the sea by your might; you broke the heads of the sea monsters on the waters. You crushed the heads of Leviathan; you gave him as meat for the people inhabiting the wilderness…”. Yep how about that?, so it seems when their Yahweh-Jehovah deity was creating the earth he was apparently also battling multi-headed and giant sea monsters living in the oceans and then feeding the ancient Hebrews with its destroyed carcass, and that’s straight from biblical text so you can’t disbelieve or deny it. And in Isaiah 27:1 we have another future “prophecy”….”…In that day, the LORD will punish with his sword, his fierce, great and powerful sword, Leviathan the gliding serpent, Leviathan the coiling serpent; he will slay the monster of the sea”. Leviathan is also mentioned in the book of Job. However we know today that this imagery, legends, magical characters and related concepts are yet again just borrowings from the older Mesopotamian and surrounding Canaanite religions traditions and beliefs. Hadad was the storm and rain god in the Canaanite and ancient Mesopotamian religions (seen pictured above on stone where Hadad battles the great sea dragon creature Lotan-Litan-Leviathan, notice also the obvious parallels and symbologies continuum with the much later book of Revelations symbologies), the Baal Cycle, also known as the Epic of Baal, is a collection of stories about the god Baal from the Canaanite area who is also referred to as Hadad, the storm-god. This collection of stories is dated between 1400 and 1200 BCE and was found in Ugarit, an ancient city located in modern-day Syria, the tradition of Hadad the storm god is believed to originate from ancient Mesopotamia (Iraq), Canaan (Palestine), Ugarit (Syria) from already in 2500 BCE then extending elsewhere. In the literature of ancient Ugarit, the god Hadad-Baal battles Yamm, who is portrayed as a chaotic, churning sea and a terrifying sea dragon named Tannun or Litanu (Lotan), which are terms equivalent to the Hebrew words used in Psalm 74 Tanninim and Leviathan, other parallels are found elsewhere in the Old Testament (Isaiah 27:1; Job 26:13) which are directly adapted from the older Ugaritic stories. Ugaritian Litanu, Lotan and Yamm and the later biblical Leviathan are in fact one and the same, that’s not too surprising since Ugarit’s culture had a lot in common with the Canaanite one from which the Hebrews later emerged. According to scholars the composition of the psalms spans clearly from the post-Exilic period (not earlier than the fifth century BCE), although according to Jewish tradition the Book of Psalms was composed even by the very First Man…Adam, which besides laughable is also bizarrely absurd and already easily proven incorrect and refuted by reality.

(The myth of Hadad defeating Lotan, Yahweh defeating Leviathan, Marduk defeating Tiamat etc, in the mythologies of the Ancient Near East are classical examples of the generic cosmogony “struggle against chaos” mytheme, also reflected in Zeus’ slaying of Typhon in Greek mythology and Thor’s struggle against Jörmungandr in the Gylfaginning portion of the Prose Edda, among other examples. Many scholars claim that Isaiah 27:1 is a direct quote lifted from the Ugaritic text, correctly rendering Ugaritic bṯn “snake” as Hebrew nḥš “snake).

The Yahweh-Jehovah snake-related punishment is recorded in Numbers 21:6-9, which apparently demonstrates that only he/it has ultimate power over serpents (and in the process over all evil and can send evil as he/it pleases). Very strangely however, not only did he send venomous snakes to punish the Israelites because of their ingratitude, but he also provided the means of a cure (i.e. – the bronze snake on a rod). It is noteworthy during this episode that the Israelites were required to gaze up at the bronze serpent to be cured, which is an obvious indication of the already existing traditions of pagan “Imitative Magic“, which is a magic based on the assumption that a desired result, person or thing can be supernaturally affected through mimicking it or through an object representing it (with other more fantastical examples to follow). Interestingly, this magic episode also shows a very evident parallel to the Ugaritic liturgy against venomous snakes as found in the Ugaritic Texts. Three texts from Ugarit, all of which address this problem of venomous snakes, suggest that the typical pagan solution was to search for a magic formula to counter the results of the venom by symbological imitative magic and/or incantations.

The main point though is that even just this example again clearly shows and proves that the OT Hebrew bible Yahweh-Jehovah deity (aka El, Hadad, Lord, God, Allah, Mo, The Big Kahuna, the One and Only Who Tips the Rain Jars etc) character and ideas is overwhelmingly religious syncretism, just a borrowed mixed bag assemblage of surrounding much older Semitic people’s pagan religions and their concepts, stories traditions, magical characters and ideas, a hodgepodge jumble patchwork deity relying on the exploits of other surrounding older deities basically and just imitating their magical deeds and powers. The relationship between the OT and the new Yahwehism-Jehovahism is that they are largely assimilated from the various older gods and goddesses of Canaan, including the leading gods El, Yahweh and Baal, the great goddesses (Asherah, Astarte and Anat), astral deities (Sun, Moon and Lucifer-Venus), and underworld deities (Mot, Resheph, Molech and the Rephaim etc) so including stories about battling Leviathian sea monsters are really not that surprising and it’s not surprising that similarly described sea creatures, serpent dragons and sea battles plots are in the Revelation book also. These are all much older pagan ideas and creatures/characters and plots floating around the Middle East since the time of the Mesopotamian religions and only much later was absorbed by the new on the scene Jews, and later Christian cults and sects. But why would they do this in the first place anyway? the answer is very simple and extremely self-evident…

…because the biblical Yahweh-Jehovah god does not exist and Old Testament passed down recorded textual material is overwhelmingly mostly just fiction, adaptions and borrowings, which makes the Yahweh-Jehovah god a complete fraud and a many centuries-long deceptive trickery-theism concoction (And you know what that means, it means all the John Hagees, Jack Van Impes and whole plethora of other similar prophet-wannabe preachers and telescamvangelists predictor fraudsters are probably disappointed now that for their entire lives they’ve actually been preaching and writing books and making DVDs and sermoning about 4500+ year old pagan Mesopotamian-Canaanite-Egyptian and other Semitic people’s pagan magical characters, ideas, concepts, stories and fables (as well as heavily influenced by Zoroastrian, Greco-Roman mythologies and concepts etc), so they’re all going to hell now without a doubt for deceiving people and the whole burning/pitchfork/burning worms thing of course, and even their favorite wowing theme of the eternal burning punishments and a “Lake of Fire” are from pagan Egyptian religious beliefs, so the nefarious scamvangelists are blatantly spreading Egyptian religions concepts that aren’t originally in the bible and they don’t even know it or even seem to care, lol, i.e. – which would mean that today in the year 2021 CE televangelists are then intentionally trying to brainwash and mold the minds of their audiences/fans into believing that Bronze Age pagan Mesopotamian, Canaanite and Egyptian religious beliefs, desert blood magic witchcraft and astrotheology concepts are from their Yahweh-Jehovah god, but importantly for faith seed shekels for some sort of harvest somewhere).

And why even plant the personally invented tree in the garden in the first place if he/it knew what would happen anyway and just get him constantly angry and genocidal?, and why curse all snakes born afterwards just because of one measly snake who wasn’t even specifically told or warned to not talk to any humans?, shouldn’t he/it have first warned the snake to keep his opinions to himself and not go around philosophizing and discussing semantics with non-snakes being all fancy-pants cerebral and questioning things? And why even make a snake that can reason and talk in the first place? He should have made it so that ducks talk instead, because c’mon seriously who’s gonna believe or listen to a talking duck, just look at them they’re ridiculous looking nobody would even listen to a talking duck. That would have saved a lot of trouble and needless smitings, genocides, lamenting and sacrifices. Also, if the bible is “real” events, “real” people and “real” history and “reality”, then why the heck are they in the “religions” section at the library? (which is usually right beside or even many times blasphemously sharing shelves with the abominations “mythology” and “fantasy” section, practically all one section or just put between them), shouldn’t they rightfully be way over in the historical reality and real world “non-fiction” section instead? (you know, along with Julius Caesar, Hannibal, Charlemagne, Herodotus, Ghenghis Khan, Hammurabi, Darius, Theodoric, Plato, Stone Age artifacts, dinosaur fossils etc), because if it’s all real and real history then that doesn’t even make any sense.
Philosoraptor has some good points. Either the Cosmos and planet flat Earth on pillars are around 6,000 years old according to biblical OT history-time chronology…meaning dinosaurs didn’t exist, or they did exist and the Earth really is round and billions of years older which would mean that the biblical anonymous writers are just lying and making things up for personal nefarious agendas, only one of them can be right.

It’s just one of many Old Testament parallels and borrowings from older pagan religions in the Middle East and not anything given by any later made up Yahweh-Jehovah god deity, most well known is probably the Epic of Gilgamesh from circa. 2100 BCE being the primary source fo the later biblical Garden of Eden, Noah’s flood and other stories. (Later various invented gematria numerology modus operandi was concocted to bring new magical meanings and predictions to former meanings and failed prophecies, but it’s mainly just feeble attempts to hide the truth and actual written texts). Although now when watching Godzilla movies you can have a whole new perspective and exciting popcorn eating viewing experience about them olden days real Leviathan battles, and the one still to come also…hehehe.

Of course, no examination about these topics of religious syncretism and cultural diffusion is even partially complete without mentioning the Epic of Gilgamesh from ancient Mesopotamia. The ancient Sumerian poem was written in cuneiform on clay tablets and they are dated to 2100 BCE (although the poem itself is regarded as several centuries older). And very interestingly they also contain various themes, plot elements, and characters found only much later in the Hebrew Bible, especially stories that correlate most notably with the accounts of the Garden of Eden, the advice from Ecclesiastes, and the Genesis flood narrative of the OT, scholars believe these and other parallels also clearly show that the Epic of Gilgamesh, which was eventually found widespread in the Levant region for many centuries, is without a doubt the origins of the much later biblical Genesis novel mythology and narrative stories. So it is also no mere coincidence that the ridiculous concocted Abram/Abraham character fable found in the OT (who supposedly lived at the same time for 58 years while Noah was still alive (because Noah lived to be 950 years old including 600 years after the flood), and who’s wife Sarah was coveted as a bride for her sexy beauty by a pharaoh and a Canaanite king…when she was 75 and over 90 years old) includes the patriarchal character who according to the story was an earlier rich wandering traveling many camels and slaves owning Babylonian magus sorcerer guru from Ur of the Chaldeans in the same Mesopotamia (i.e. Iraq, and btw also becoming a mythological founder of 100s and 1000s of mutating and contradictory cults and sects of 3 major religions). Obvious parallels and examples of the religious mythology syncretism and various cultural diffusion that took place in the Levant region over time.
You see “Thou shalt not kill” only applies to your own people or village or slave owners, when it’s other foreign people, cattle, babies or religions then there’s a loophole and it’s actually open season, because you always have to have loopholes of course everyone knows that (either that or it’s just yet another contradiction about something).
Loopholes are definitely the way to go. It’s also not strange or very surprising that according to Dan Barker who is a former Bible-Belt Pastor, and many, many, many scholars over the years and others, the OT god is correctly described as the most unpleasant character in all fiction; jealous and proud of it; a petty, unjust, unforgiving, control-freak; a vindictive, bloodthirsty ethnic cleanser; a misogynistic, ultra extreme ethnocentric parochial, infanticidal, genocidal, filicidal, pestilential, megalomaniacal, sadomasochistic, capriciously malevolent bully, pyromaniacal, angry, merciless, curse-hurling, vaccicidal, aborticidal, cannibalistic, slavemonger, homicidal, evil, and a terrorist, and it even admits it himself that he creates evil and more, see his website https://unpleasant.ffrf.org/ for easy to read proof with the bible verses people don’t like to admit exists which shows that the OT god is really no god at all but is more an absurd primitive tribal moral monster. (Basically, all that modern day rigmarol about all-knowing, all-wise, all-loving etc, especially by telescamvangelists today, is just personal invented faith shekels seeds jimble jamble).
Without a doubt, Jesus’ all-powerful super-duper smart deranged skydaddy Yahweh-Jehovah was the Lord of Loopholes that’s for sure (After all, what’s a god without a loophole I tell you).
Yep like I said, loopholes are very, very important.

It’s very interesting for those unaware to also know that the word “Demon” actually comes from the word “Daemon” which is the Latin word for the Ancient Greek word “Daimon” (meaning: god, godlike, power, fate etc), which originally referred to a lesser deity. Daimons were also possibly seen as the souls of men of the golden age acting as tutelary deities, a religious, philosophical, literary and psychological concept also meaning “provider of destinies”, benevolent or benign nature spirits, similar to ghosts, chthonic heroes, spirit guides, forces of nature etc, having absolutely no negative connotations. However later Abrahamic religions have borrowed and twisted the word’s original etymology and meaning by applying it to various Ancient Mesopotamian and ancient Semitic Canaanite and Egyptian deities, guardian and wandering spirits (the “wanderers” are associated with possession, mental illness, death and plagues), underworld spirits/deities that could terrorize mortals on earth and even drag them back down with them. Later the Tanakh-Hebrew bible mentions two classes of “demonic” spirits, the se’irim and the shedim. The word shedim appearing in two places in the Tanakh (Psalms, Deuteronomy), the se’irim are mentioned once in Leviticus and probably a re-calling of Assyrian demons in the shape of goats. The shedim in return are not pagan demigods, but the very foreign gods themselves. From Chaldea, the term shedu traveled to the Israelites and they eventually applied the word to all surrounding Canaanite deities. There are indications that demons in popular Hebrew mythology were believed to come from the nether world who brought various diseases and ailments and particularly those affecting the brain and those of an internal nature. Examples include catalepsy, headache, epilepsy and nightmares etc. There also existed a demon of blindness, “Shabriri” (“dazzling glare”) who rested on uncovered water at night and blinded those who drank from it. The later word “Demon” was used as an umbrella term for all these previous Middle Eastern-Canaanite/Egyptian/Mesopotamian religion’s deities and spirits and then applied on various ailments and diseases supposedly brought by them onto humans. In this primitive hocus pocus worldview of theirs the germs, bacterias, chromosome abnormalities, viruses, DNA mutations etc that actually caused blindness, abnormal births, deformities etc actually had nothing to do with it because they thought it was all just floating around demons.

“Daimons” (left, aka Daemons) of Classical Antiquity transformed into later Abrahamic religions floating and wandering so-called “Demons” (pictured right). Daimons were pagan entities (similar to other Croatian Hyperborean folkloric nature spirits and deities/fairies/paranormal entities etc from the Pre-Common Era) and were also possibly seen as the souls of men of the golden age acting as tutelary deities, a religious, philosophical, literary and psychological concept also meaning “provider of destinies”, benevolent or benign nature spirits, similar to ghosts, chthonic heroes, spirit guides, forces of nature etc, having absolutely no negative connotations. But later they were transformed into the grotesque ghoulish spirits who inhabited the lands of the Middle East for thousands of years and renamed them “demons” who now instead caused various problems around the world, all that new underworld burning worms pitchforking stuff and eventually starring in numerous movies, pepper hot sauces, canned hams and foods connotations (sort of like transforming Mickey Mouse into Oogie Boogie). So basically people who during their whole lives, and their ancestors before them for probably thousands of years, who would beseech various nature deities and benevolent spirits and guides for protection while traveling in the forests or for successful hunts and fishing spots or better health or directions at night etc, were all of a sudden now told that they shouldn’t contact or ask them for anything because they’re actually Middle Eastern demons looking to cause them harm, eat them and torture them eternally in the burning underground Egyptian fire lava pits, which sure is different and made-up rubbish.
As explained in my previous post, the concepts of an afterlife netherworld of torturous punishments, underworld fiery spirits (today erroneously called “demons” as already explained there), the concepts of final Judgment of the Dead, burning punishments and a final destroying “Lake of Fire” are also imported ideas originally from ancient Egyptian religious beliefs and their Books of the Netherworld, Book of the Dead as well as the Coffin Texts dated from already 2100 BCE. i.e. – the recorded concept of hell in ancient Egypt predates the recorded concept of hell in the modern religions of Judaism, Christianity and Islam by many centuries and so it was invented by them and then only later spread to the other religions. Those who were judged unfavorably were bound having their limbs tied and then tortured in every imaginable way and then finally “destroyed” in an eternal “Lake of Fire”, a Pool of Fire filled with fiery burning lava liquid. They are painted on the walls of tombs and in ancient papyrus showing burning bodies of the damned floating in the Lake of Fire, fed by flames from braziers along the lake’s edges. So many televangelists, preachers and cults and sects gurus are actually spreading ancient Egyptian afterlife burning fire and religious ideas thinking it’s originally biblical or some secret given hocus pocus knowledge by their god.
And besides all that cool lakes of fire torture burnings punishments hijinx ideas imported later by the Jewish elite priests and scribes, is of course the neato custom of slavery which the floating skydaddy had no major problems with and actually approved. Above an image from a stone carving of ancient Egyptians with some newly captured African slaves of their most hated mortal enemy the Nubians, which the new later Yahweh-Jehovah tribal god apparently thought was such a great idea that he even gave rules about slave owning for his chosen peeps also. According to the story, giving rules on how to manage and be ruthless to foreign slaves because they were the owner’s personal property…forever, and better rules for native slaves, when to punish them by death, or to just beat them to within an inch of their life or losing an eyeball (because they were the owner’s rightful property according to god’s law just like his oxen, camels and sheep etc). So strangely, instead of abolishing the slavery custom along with eating pork spare ribs and shellfish, it’s apparent the later appearing new Yahweh-Jehovah desert storm god had no real issues with Egyptian slavery more or less and so later just adapted and popularized the custom so that his peeps could have lots of them also. It’s very apparent from even just the few examples shown here, after returning from the Babylonian captivity the newly devised and mutating personal Yahweh-Jehovah desert tribal god owes his whole existence and religion practically to the beliefs, theologies and customs of the older surrounding Zoroastrian, Mesopotamian, Egyptian and other Levant and Canaanite pagan religions. (even the customs of circumcision and being forbidden to eat pork has much earlier tradition origins from them also, particularly because the Egyptian god Set murdered his brother Osiris and would transform into a black pig as well as being an enemy of Horus, thus the taboo of eating swine still being a religious prohibition among Jews and Muslims even still today because those religions sprang and grew in the same geographically and culturally coterminous Levant area which included ancient Canaan). Image: touregypt.net.
Just one of numerous examples in biblical/OT text, where the original written “scripture” was referred to again later but after the Babylonian captivity and return to ancient Canaan and Jerusalem where now the newly adopted Zoroastrian concept and mutated character of Satan was introduced, more specifically where the personal trait and actions of Yahweh (aka God these days) is now instead transferred to a newly invented powerful entity who erroneously gets the blame instead. You’ve got to obey Satan-God and that’s a fact, and for someone who says he’s all-knowing, all-powerful and all-wise and that he never changes his mind or repent…well he sure does change his mind a lot and repent (more problematic “god-spoken contradictions”).
El” the first original and oldest OT biblical god, before mutating into the Zoroastrian inspired Yahweh-Jehovah god (aka Jesus’ dad, the big guy, Moses’, Noah’s, Abe’s and Ezekiel’s homie-boss, the Big Kahuna of the garden and planet, the one and only who tips the rain jars etc), as well as the guy most people refer to when hoping to win the lottery or ball game, when the tv remote wasn’t broken but just needed new batteries, when the drive-thru is still open past midnight or when people sneeze etc (e.g. -…”Whew thank god, the Jerry Springer show was about to begin but the remote wasn’t broken it just needed new batteries!”…”Whew thank god the drive-thru is still open I’m starving!” etc). Btw as a reminder, there is no “J” sound in Hebrew and so the name actually is more properly understood as Joshua, Yēšūaʿ = Jesus in Hebrew, which is just a common alternative form of the name Yəhōšūaʿ = Joshua, sort of like Mary-Marie etc, televangelists won’t tell you any of these facts presented here because it complicates the books and DVD sales but especially the temple faith shekels donations especially in Texas.
The Yahweh-Jehovah God reminiscing about the good ol’ early days of child sacrificings with his people. Well, he did say that “he creates the evil,” so it’s really not that surprising (this of course was before satan because he didn’t exist yet until invented as a scapegoat centuries later after the Babylonian exile). Luckily there are numerous similar text excerpts which were not 100% omitted after editing, censuring and redacting by later scribes which are vestiges of the earliest times, traditions and beliefs of the religion, and which give a much more clearer and informative understanding of the linear history to scholars today.
Yahweh-Jehovah apparently promised to throw a really great down-home BBQ shindig (but no pork spare ribs or shellfish of course).
Well, the way I see it, it did make the talking snake, and it did make and plant the tree, and it does know the future of everything everywhere before it even happens supposedly, so then that would mean…well…it probably means something to somebody somewhere for some reason or another, anyway…

As just one example, above is the opinion of Ze’ev Herzog, an Israeli archaeologist, professor of archaeology at The Department of Archaeology and Ancient Near Eastern Cultures at Tel Aviv University specializing in social archaeology, ancient architecture and field archaeology. He just might…just might know a little more than John Hagee, Kenneth Copeland, Joyce Meyer, Pat Robertson, Billy Graham and, well, more than lots of people writing and spreading fabulist fiction stories and abstract concepts histories behind microphones, on stages and on television and Youtube sermons. Here’s an excerpt of what else he thinks based on his “years of research”…..”This is what archaeologists have learned from their excavations in the Land of Israel: the Israelites were never in Egypt, did not wander in the desert, did not conquer the land in a military campaign and did not pass it on to the 12 tribes of Israel. Perhaps even harder to swallow is the fact that the united monarchy of David and Solomon, which is described by the Bible as a regional power, was at most a small tribal kingdom. And it will come as an unpleasant shock to many that the God of Israel, Jehovah, had a female consort and that the early Israelite religion adopted monotheism only in the waning period of the monarchy and not at Mount Sinai. Most of those who are engaged in scientific work in the interlocking spheres of the Bible, archaeology and the history of the Jewish people – and who once went into the field looking for proof to corroborate the Bible story – now agree that the historic events relating to the stages of the Jewish people’s emergence are radically different from what that story tells…”. It appears then that the archaeological records also support many of the biblical mythicist’s findings and their source materials/literary/historical evidences (and statements based on overwhelming lack of evidences).

Francesca Stavrakopoulou is a biblical scholar and broadcaster, currently Professor of Hebrew Bible and Ancient Religion at the University of Exeter, with a main focus of research on the Hebrew Bible and on Israelite and Judahite history and religion. She also explores and discusses various biblical historical subjects, Abrahamic religions real historical realities, archaeological evidences and their origins and texts development as a TV presenter on BBC2 and Channel 4.

In her most recent book God: An Anatomy, her scholarly findings from many years of research also likewise show that about three thousand years ago, in the Southwest Asian lands we now call Israel and Palestine, aka ancient Canaan, a group of people worshipped a complex pantheon of deities, led by the father god called El. El had seventy children, who were gods in their own right. One of them was a minor storm deity, known as Yahweh. But not only that, Yahweh had a body, a wife, offspring and colleagues. He fought monsters and mortals. He gorged on food and wine, wrote books, and took walks and naps. But he would eventually become something far larger and far more abstract: the God of the monotheistic religions, aka Abrahamic religions (Blog author’s note – this would eventually become the Jesus character’s dad a few centuries later btw, who of course would go on to declare that shopping, uploading Youtube videos and mowing the lawn on the new Sunday sabbath was OK, that everyone in the world, including even the Japanese and North American Native Peoples, can become a risen floating zombie some day, and that garlic butter shrimp pasta, lobster, bacon and crab salad were permissible to eat, well he didn’t actually really say that anywhere but some guy on tv said that he was 110% sure that he allegorically and metaphorically said it probably, anyway…).

Professor Francesca Stavrakopoulou reveals that this Abrahamic God’s cultural DNA stretches back centuries before the Bible was even written, and persists in the tics and twitches of our own society, whether we are believers or not. Examining God’s body, from his head to his hands, feet and genitals, she shows (with textual and archaeological evidences) how the much later invented Western idea of “God” developed and mutated from this original Late Bronze/Iron Age primitive desert alpha male tribal god. That it was at first the “high god”, El, who presides over a heavenly court of deities; he has a divine consort and a son or deputy who is depicted as a military champion, often a storm-spirit, subduing the primordial sea monster so as to bring order to the world. This deputy is often encountered and worshipped on wild and exposed mountain tops. In Syria, his name is Ba’al, “the master”. But in fact the texts of Hebrew scripture depict the later god of Israel, Yahweh, as behaving in almost exactly the same way as Ba’al: he is a storm-god, a warrior, the conqueror of primeval chaos, a habitue of sacred mountain tops such as Sinai. More startlingly, he is spoken of with much the same level of intensely physical vocabulary as the gods of the earlier pantheon, and over centuries eventually El has mutated to become the new tribal version Yahweh.

Language that most religious readers have unreflectively treated as vaguely poetic licence (God’s right arm, the soles of his feet, his internal organs, his face, his breath, even his genitals) is shown to be rooted in mythical conventions that cannot be taken as straightforwardly metaphorical. It belongs in a mindset for which the divine is a hugely magnified version of physical human dominance – male (and sexually predatory as his followers were), aggressive, imagined in terms of conventional primitive Levantine masculine glamour. But, in this revelatory study, Francesca Stavrakopoulou presents a vividly corporeal image of God: a human-shaped deity who walks and talks and weeps and laughs, who is jealous, angry, repents and seeks vengeance, who eats, sleeps, feels, and breathes, and who is undeniably seen as visitations of the Levant warrior alpha male. The biblical god may have had a comprehensive theological makeover by the time the Hebrew Scriptures reached their present form, but the invented Iron Age untamed desert alpha male deity of archaic west Asian and Middle Eastern myth is behind the later added literary makeup and never far away. There is even solid archaeological evidence for the god of Israel, like his earlier counterparts in the region, as originally having a female divine consort. Here is a portrait – arrived at through the author’s close examination of and research into the Bible – of a god in ancient myths and rituals who was a product of a particular society, at a particular time, made in the image of the people who lived then, shaped by their own circumstances, experiences, wishes and of their primitive views of the world and of others living in that world. More information in the included interview video below.

A short video which better explains some of the previously mentioned facts up to now, i.e. – How in the mythological fables the talking serpent eventually became Satan by going backwards in time because he didn’t exist yet, how the biblical God really is Satan who creates the evil (Isaiah 45:7) and then performs evil under the guise of his other name/names/identities and also by giving himself permission to commit his evil for your own good to stop you from thinking and using your brain, which you should be thankful for. This topic of foreign deities, characters and religious astrotheology concepts being borrowed and incorporated by Jewish scribes and priests from ancient Mesopotamian religions, Zoraoastrian religion, ancient Canaanite and even Egyptian religions ideas and characters will be discussed. (Even how their god “Yahweh” is just one of several gods borrowed from other Bronze Age pagan Semitic peoples and ancient Canaanite religions (including “El” and others), who just mutated and was molded into their own personal “national god of Israel”, usually in the form of a “storm god” or a “warrior deity”).
Back in the biblical hocus pocus universe times and lands, demons and demon possessions was about as common as people today with dandruff or headaches, but where did they all go? or more importantly where did they all come from anyway? More later about this very eye-opening information and illuminating exposé of the real origins of the much later invented superheroes, deities, demons, netherworld hell and punishments, astrotheologies, lakes of fire, zombies resurrections, spirits, characters and other wacko abstract concepts, where they all originated from and how they mutated and mutated some more (including even right up to that deviled ham spread logo guy and today’s movies) etc, that nothing is what it seems and as most people erroneously think and invent basically.
The birthing of a many-faced and very primitive contradictory tribal deity and future father of the jesus character (and not nearly as wise or all-knowing and all-powerful or as good a warrior, teacher, doctor or chef as some people pretend and claim either), elaborating on some of the previously made points.
I had to add this bit of information that’s directly related to the above video, because of all the ridiculous hocus pocus fable events, including the new on the scene tribal god’s mass killings, plagues and smitings of Israelites and other enemy peoples back and forth like a boring lamenting killfest smorgasbord, and other nonsensical killings and rubbish in the book of Exodus, although not on the scale of the most well known episodes some of which I’ve mentioned at this blog, Moses’ brother Aaron is one character that I always thought was a really weird strange one just like a comic book character, and the episodes including him always get overlooked unfortunately and never really even explored, unfortunately I say because it’s plain downright hilarious and bizarre comedic kitsch rubbish at it’s lowbrow finest, it’s practically a 3 stooges episode. So let me get this straight…after all the magical hocus pocus miracles, staffs into snakes, death angels and plagues and the whole parting and walking through the Red Sea thing and glorious freedom from slavery and Egypt finally (although not long afterwards the Israelites are already crying and complaining wishing they were back in Egypt), eventually Moses walks up and down a mountain “8 times” in all talking to Yahweh-Jehovah (this after Yahweh-Jehovah arrives on top with hot burning fire, lava and smoke clouds, thunder and lightning and the earth quaking just like a volcano, including a great loud trumpet concert, it was quite an impressive show for everyone at the camp below basically), and then including even bringing his brother Aaron up “twice” to see and listen to Yahweh-Jehovah god in person also because Yahweh told him to bring him along, but not long after during the 6th time that Moses is up on the mountain alone for 40 days, his brother it seems was apparently not that impressed seeing and listening to the Master of the Universe and Midian after all, and he soon instead tells the Israelites that it was actually the golden calf who is their god that led them to freedom and out of Egypt, a golden calf that he even makes with his own hands and he also starts sacrificing to it on a special alter he personally made too, and after that he even proclaims a great joyous festival for the next day for all the Israelites to eat and drink and sing and perform sacrifices to the golden calf!. Then after this laughable stabbing his brother Moses and his God in the back episode the absurdity continues…the God and Moses command the slaughtering and deaths of thousands of the Israelites, telling the priestly Levites tribe to go around the camp with their swords and killing their brothers, friends and neighbors, and the next day Yahweh even sending a plague on the ones left over as icing on the cake. But what happens to traitorous Aaron the rogue ringleader for his crimes? Absolutely nothing! He gets totally unpunished and suffering no consequences! lol, this is so farcical and absurd that I can’t fathom how people fall for and believe these absurd fables (because he was the official handpicked by Yahweh-Jehovah to be high priest of the Israelites and leader of the priests? probably, but it still makes him basically an outright traitorous enemy and usurper to Moses and his god in leading a very major rebellion-revolution, he even makes the later Judas character seem like just a clumsy oaf choirboy). Interestingly not long afterwards and very amusing again, his two sons Nadab and Abihu get killed by the volcano god also, why?…because during all the many god demanded sacrificings going on continually they absentmindedly lit their incense censers with regular fire coals instead of god’s sacrificing fire coals, so Yahweh-Jehovah god had a major fit and instantly zapped them to death for their disobedience….wow, take that you disobedient scoundrels! (and when you think the absurdity episode is finished…get this…after fiery zapping of the brothers then god demands, as in he “demands” it, that their father Aaron, his family and all the Israelites show absolutely no grief, sympathy, empathy or mourn the deaths of the brothers in any way whatsoever, he literally “demands” it, as well as to not touch them but immediately drag and dump their bodies outside the camp…pronto immediately!, so that all the sacrificings don’t get interrupted or slowed down. Now that sure is a volcano god who likes to be in complete control and get things done the right way that’s for sure, Jesus’ dad is very, very particular it seems or else he’ll zap you like Thanos or Iron Man…e.g. – God: “Grrrr! Using regular fire coals instead of my special sacrificing fire coals for incense!?, Oh that’s it you’re dead…zaaap! zaaap!). It’s like the biblical god, the superheroes and characters or even just the authors themselves had textbook cases of schizotypal personality disorder. On top of other later stuff that adds much more to the ridiculousness and killings/smitings/plagues categories, believe it or not many churches today consider this Aaron character an official saint with icons and church feast days, I don’t know what kind of kool-aid they’re all drinking or what book they’re reading because when I was a kid I read much better and much more interesting and much more believable comic books, suspension of disbelief much? (Just like Robert Tilton would say “I don’t make this stuff up“, in the books and comics writing biz this is aka a “plot twist” and “the old switcheroo”).
Dagnabit that Zoroastrianism!, just when you think you know them magical truths and secret cosmic news scoop secrets of the floating big guy in the sky, then you find out it’s just mostly that Zoroastrianism again, gimme that ol’ time religion and dang you Zoroastering shenanigans!, explaining the linear mutating continuum from early Judaism to Islam aka Judaism version 3.0 (More about the Zoroastrian, Mesopotamian, Egyptian and other ancient older pagan Levant religions beliefs, astrotheologies and abstract concepts that was adopted and mutated into Abrahamic religions in the previous Derreck Bennett video).
People and scholars for thousands of years have been searching for any written record or mention by anybody, particularly by any nearby nation’s written records or mentions that existed at the time about the astounding magical events and characters involved in the Exodus stories-novels that are supposed to be some of the most important historical events to have ever taken place in the history of the world supposedly. However the archaeological record and written evidences (and overwhelming non-existence of corroborating evidences) show that the stories of the creation, of the flood, of Abraham, of Jacob, of the descent into and the exodus from Egypt, of the career of Moses and the Jews in the desert, of Joshua and his soldiers, of the judges and their clients, are all apocryphal and mostly fabricated histories at a much later period of Jewish history, even up to today all that has been found is…crickets.
Yep,, Satan was originally actually Yahweh-Jehovah god’s helper pal and friend and one of the “70 sons of god” and not an evil enemy, until the later borrowed and adapted Zoroastrian, Mesopotamian, Egyptian and other ancient older pagan Levant and Canaanite religions beliefs, astrotheologies and abstract concepts, (including primitive desert blood magic, zombies, eternal burning worms/pitchforking, lakes of fire etc), which would then mean that the OT god is actually ancient Persian (Iranian) and the newer later version Satan-Diabolus Devil character is also, so it’s actually mostly the Zoroastrian shenanigans that’s being taught and preached by televangelists, their fabulist minions and others for their temples shekels coffers and for even more shekels faith seeds.
Like I said “Thou shalt not kill” only applies to your own people or village or slave owners, when it’s other foreign people, cattle, babies or religions then there’s a loophole and it’s actually open season, the same actually goes for coveting in the OT text (which probably hardly anybody has actually read in its entirety anyway and the different versions), because you’re just not supposed to covet your own people’s/neighbor’s slaves, oxen, sheep, tents etc, And you actually can beat your slave because god said so in his very own book so it’s straight from the horse’s mouth master of the universe, because they’re your rightful property just like your sex slaves, camels and goats, loopholes are really great. (I should also note that the Charlton Heston and Yul Brynner movie is wrongly presented, misleading and omits lots of information from the mythological text narrative, as briefly explained above, and perhaps even most shocking to most…Charlton Heston and Yul Brynner were actually only just actors who were only pretending to be a Moses and a Pharaoh with help from Hollywood special effects, that’s right they were outright frauds portraying fable characters with the magic of Hollywood special effects!, (I very highly doubt Yul Brynner could turn even 1 staff into a snake let alone 2 staffs into snakes, I don’t have any evidence or proof to support my personal view but that’s what I believe), and not only that… Yvonne De Carlo who portrayed Moses’ wife Zipporah she even went on to become Lily Munster…which could very well mean that…The Munsters were actually based on real people and events!?).
Francesca Stavrakopoulou mentioned earlier commenting on some of the topics discussed here, and who probably knows a thing or two more about these things than the average telescamvangelist (Many telescamvangelists over the years have declared that she is the literal incarnation of the prophesied Anti-Joyce Meyer risen from the 9th Circle of Hell and the dark netherworld concubine of even Azazel himself (Woe unto you Ben-El Shareem!), and that her books will steal the promised faith shekels seeds from their holy temple coffers and book publishers prophets, they also accuse her of bringing on the nefarious great false Beelzebub predictor who with his infernal archaeological locusts, goats and miracle working 7-headed beast dragon paleontologist from the sea Damien who will cause many to abominationally eat bacon and cream cheese wrapped shrimp, crab salad sandwiches and erect a golden roofed Red Lobster restaurant on the Jerusalem Temple Mount as an ultimate apocalyptic abomination of diabolical necromantical desolations of super-duper nefarious abominations and culminating in her and Joyce Meyer in an epic wrestling steel cage match for control of Jerusalem, Tokyo, Honolulu and probably the world, so that should be interesting and a good one to get popcorn for).
And lastly as another much later example highlighted by the Nebra sky disc, dated by archaeologists to around 1600 BCE during the time of the Bronze Age Unetice Culture in Central Europe, the areas from whence the earliest Croatian tribes were located in antiquity and also called Hyperborea by later Greek and Roman writers, which would make the decorated disk at least 3,600 years old, and probably much older as that is only when it was buried with estimates of being 3,800 to 4,100 years old (the inlaid gold symbols are interpreted generally as the Sun or Full Moon, a lunar crescent, and the Pleiades star cluster, two golden arcs along the sides to mark the angle between the solstices and together it features the oldest concrete depiction of the cosmos yet known from anywhere in the world). Also it is now proven scientifically that the ancestors of the later Croats, the Balto-Slavic speaking peoples, Germanic and Celts populated Europe long before 4 thousand years ago, which also connects with DNA and genetic evidences the earliest pre-migration Croatian tribes to the Bronze Age Unetice Culture, these times and geographically coterminous areas. The circa. 3,600-4,100 year old disc was made long before any Germanic or Balto-Slavic languages groups appeared, we don’t even know what language it was that they used or whether it is connected to any modern languages that exist today, perhaps probably a Hyperborean proto-language older than any European language that German and Balto-Slavic languages eventually sprang forth from. (Interesting to note also, genetically, on the Y chromosome line, a majority (87%) of Croats belong to one of the three major European Y-DNA haplogroups – Haplogroup I (38%), Haplogroup R1a (35%) and Haplogroup R1b (16%). All three of these groups appeared in Europe during the Upper Paleolithic around 30,000-20,000 BCE. Furthermore, the dominant presence of Haplogroup I-M170 is rather interesting, as it is considered the oldest and only native European haplogroup and is found nowhere else. The Haplogroup I-M170 exists only in Europe and is fairly widespread, but in relatively smaller percentages extending westward and eastward. Its frequency in the Croatian lands and among Croats is high, but the only populations that have similar levels of the I Haplogroup are the Scandinavians. Haplogroup I-M170 has been shown to have weathered the last glacial maximum in the lands corresponding to modern day Croatia and surrounding area in Central Europe and then migrated north as the ice sheets retreated. Also, by these statistics we can clearly see that the strongest Haplogroup in Croatians is Haplogroup I-M170 and that we share subclades of Haplogroup I-M170 with Scandinavians more than anyone else in Europe, so the early European populations that went on to become Scandinavians also went on to become Croatians, and in the process the preceding Hyperboreans). But the main point is, this and many other evidences are just more proof that people lived and had functioning societies and technologies manufacturing capabilities of various items in those areas during those times. But we need to ask why would a Zoroastrian Yahweh-Jehovah desert tribal deity only be vacationing, floating and hanging around the Middle East then? Why only galavanting there talking only to a few guys in the desert once in a very long while or once every few centuries, just to give secret blood magic news scoops, sacrificings, slaughtering and fashion and food eating tips? If he’s so great why not tell people in Europe? or in Asia? or the Native Peoples living in California and Mexico etc? Why the heck only floating around in and fixated with only remote Levant area deserts doing hocus pocus and that’s it? Why only giving news scoops advice to traveling recluse nobodies living in caves or tents in the middle of nowhere? and then just smitings and lamentings and failed prophecies constantly back and forth? That makes absolutely no sense if you’re supposedly the all-powerful, all-knowing master of the universe and of the planet but you can’t even find the Danube river or Japan or Mexico to tell them too, (if he did can you imagine just how many more faith shekels seeds could be had for the temples coffers? lots more that’s for sure, and lots more sheep’s blood too as a bonus), it instead sounds much more like just yet another puny invented ho-hum desert tribal deity and his contradictory long-winded jimble jamble speeches…which it is. (some scholars suggest there are 3 reasons why it didn’t appear to anyone in Europe to pass on his news scoops and grooming tips…1- either he was unable to as per the chariots of iron scenario, 2- he didn’t want to because he knew full well they wouldn’t give up their bacon and pork roasts recipes for anyone, or 3- because the talking snake gave him the wrong directions and he ended up in Antarctica, many scholars are even still today debating this contradictory problematic topic).

More information:







*Author’s note – To better explain this post title choice of wording it should be known that today’s word “god” is actually from an etymology that is Gothic and Proto-Germanic from ǥuđán, originally a pagan religion word meaning “pouring forth” as in libation, pouring forth a liquid as an offering to an idol or spirit or an invocation at a burial mound, first introduced into Wulfla’s 4th century Gothic Bible. Webster’s New Collegiate Dictionary says that the origin of the word ‘God’ comes from a Germanic word ‘Gad,’ pronounced as “Gohdt” and coming from a word simply meaning the “invoked one” and even “Lord Moon”, as in conjuring forth and summoning up spirits and power, therefore it’s not a name. And the included “-Jehovah” name is just an often used wrongly pronounced and spelled version of Yahweh, and if anything should be properly pronounced as “Yehovah”, the same actually goes for Jesus and Joshua and Judah and many others (Yeshua, Yehoshua and Yahuda etc), “Jehovah” is a Latinization version from the reformation in the 16th century and so is incorrectly pronounced today because there is no “J” sound in Hebrew. Jehovah’s Witnesses are especially constantly wrong and shooting themselves in the foot regarding even just this topic, knowingly pronouncing their god’s name could very well be blasphemous or at the very least heretical. (More information and examples of very evident and easy to see numerous contradictions, errors, failed predictions, invented mythologies/fables, (largely anonymously written at that actually and proven spurious forged writings along with interpolated mutating absurd ideas), ignorance of the actual real natural world processes, primitive Bronze-Iron Age worldviews, cosmological and deserts blood magic beliefs and basically just plain made-up rubbish in the bible and Abrahamic religions in general, as well as among many of their propagandists even today of course, at National Security Alert: Foreign Televangelists, Cults, Sects).

This is some bonus article material I came across after finishing this post, and information which falls in line with a number of the points I mentioned so I’m including it here. Coincidentally the scholarly input and article is even from a respected Israeli newspaper as well as being the longest running newspaper in the country, so it’s not some floating multi-headed creatures and beasts jimble jamble ramblings on a fringe hocus pocus blood magic tin foil hat website. As a result without a doubt this information will then anger many hocus pocus charlatans, fabulist gurus and of course all the telescamvangelists I mentioned here (who will probably pronounce the newspaper and the findings of the scholars and archaeologists as blasphemous and heretical and being under the power of the great dragon and his fiery locusts and demon goats etc), the article information will also cause much lamenting and weeping among their various temples coffers guardian angels undoubtedly, which is the unpardonable transgression of course.

Article from haaretz.com.

Jewish God Yahweh Originated in Canaanite Vulcan, Says New Theory

  • The cult of YHWH as god of metallurgy originated among semi-nomadic copper smelters between the Bronze and Iron Age, suggests biblical scholar: And he was not worshipped only by Jews

TIMNA – Around 3,200 years ago, the great empires around the Mediterranean and the Middle East suddenly imploded. The Egyptians retreated from Canaan and the copper mines of Timna in the Negev, skulking back to the banks of the Nile. And in the arid wastes of southern Canaan, a new power arose.

The Timna mines were taken over by semi-nomadic tribes, which set up a mining operation that dwarfed the previous Egyptian industry.

This new desert kingdom would leave its mark on the main building at Timna: the Egyptian temple of Hathor, protector of miners. The new masters smashed the effigy of the Egyptian deity – leaving the fragments to be found by archaeologists more than 3,000 years later – and set up over the ruins of the temple a tent sanctuary, judging by the remains of heavy red and yellow fabric found in the 1970s.

There they worshipped a new god, one that had no apparent name or face.

That miners’ god was none other than the deity known by the four Hebrew letters YHWH, who would become the God of the Jews and, by extension, of Christians and Muslims, claims Nissim Amzallag, a biblical studies researcher at Ben-Gurion University.

According to Amzallag, long before becoming the deity of the Israelites, Yahweh was a god of metallurgy in the ancient Canaanite pantheon, worshipped by smelters and metalworkers throughout the Levant, not just by the Hebrews. His theory is not exactly widely accepted, but has recently been gaining traction.

Roughly from the 19th century, biblical scholars began looking at scripture less as records of divine revelations and more as historical and literary documents. This has led, for example, to the so-called “Documentary Hypothesis,” which considers the Torah, the first five books of the Bible, to be a compilation from multiple sources, each produced by different authors with their own beliefs and agendas.

But mysteries remain: where did the YHWH cult originate? Who were the first people to worship him? And how did he end up being the sole deity of a group called Israel, who, as their very name says (in Hebrew), didn’t even start out as a Yahwistic people, but as followers of El, the main god of the Canaanite pantheon?

Fire and brimstone

Most scholars already believe that the cult of Yahweh first emerged somewhere in the southern Levant, partly based on Egyptian texts from the late second millennium B.C.E. These documents describe groups of Canaanite nomads collectively known as Shasu, including one tribe named Shasu Yhw(h) – perhaps the first recorded Yahweh worshippers in history.

The Bible itself may contain a memory of this southern origin of Yahweh, as it tells us explicitly that God “came from Teman” (Habbakuk 3:3) or that he “went out of Seir” and “marched out of Edom” (Judges 5:4-5) – all toponyms associated with the area ranging from Sinai to the Negev and northern Arabia.

“Everybody recognizes these southern origins of Yahweh, but most scholars stop there,” Amzallag says. “This forms the basis of my theory as well, but I take it a step forward.”

Reading between the lines, the Bible contains clues pointing to an original identity for Yahweh as a metallurgical deity, he says.

In the Bible, Yahweh’s appearance is usually accompanied by volcanic-like phenomena. When he descends upon Mt. Sinai to reveal the Torah to the Jews, the mountain erupts in fire, spewing lava and billowing clouds accompanied by earthquakes and thunderstorms (Exodus 19:16-19).

In antiquity, metallurgical deities like the Greek Hephaestus or his eponymous Roman equivalent, Vulcan, were associated with volcanic descriptions – which closely mirror the smoke, fire, black slag and molten red metal produced in the smelting process, Amzallag says.

Poetic metaphors throughout the Bible describe Yahweh as a fiery deity who makes the mountains smoke (Psalms 144:5) and melts them down (Isaiah 63:19b), just like smelters melt down ore to obtain copper and other metals, the researcher notes. In fact, in Psalm 18:18 Yahweh is depicted as an anthropomorphized furnace: “smoke rose from his nostrils; consuming fire came from his mouth, burning coals blazed out of it.”

To ancient people, the process of melting down rocks to extract metal would have “appeared completely preternatural and required a divine explanation,” Amzallag told Haaretz.

Yahweh’s metallurgical attributes were also on display in the pillar of fire and smoke by which he guides the Hebrews in the desert (Exodus 13:21) and the cloud that accompanies his visits to the Tent of Meeting (Exodus 33:9-10), a simpler version of the Tabernacle in which Moses speaks face to face with God.

The description of this tent bears remarkable similarities to the sanctuary in Timna, further suggesting that 3,000 years ago, this place may have been dedicated to the worship of Yahweh, Amzallag maintains.

Yahweh, god of the Edomites?

But wait a minute – the Bible and most archaeologists agree that after the collapse of the Egyptian empire in the 12th century B.C.E., Timna was taken over by the Edomites, not the Israelites.

While the Bible goes to great lengths to describe Israel’s neighbors – such as the Edomites, the Midianites and the Moabites – as dastardly pagans, the text also betrays that Yahweh was worshipped by these nations too, possibly even before the Israelites did so, Amzallag notes. Genesis 36, for example, makes it clear that the Edomites are descendants of Esau, Jacob’s brother, and lists Edomite monarchs who ruled “before any Israelite king reigned” (Genesis 36:31).

The Ammonites and Moabites are listed as descendants of Lot (Genesis 19:37-38), the nephew of Abraham and pious Yahweh-believer who escaped the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah.

In other words, the genealogies of the Bible contain the memory of an ancient confederation of Canaanite peoples, who may have considered themselves all descendants of Abraham and who all worshipped Yahweh alongside other gods, Amzallag posits.

We should trust the Bible on this, he says, because its editors wouldn’t have wanted to admit that the cult of Yahweh was not exclusive to Israel. “So, if they reference it, it must be true,” Amzallag concludes.

Further biblical evidence of this broadened base of worshippers can be found in the Book of Exodus, where a key role is played by Jethro, Moses’ father-in-law, who lives near the mountain of God (alternatively called Horeb and Sinai).

It is Jethro who indirectly leads Moses to his first meeting with Yahweh at the burning bush. And it is he who inaugurates the Tent of Meeting with a sacrifice and proclaims that “Yahweh is greater than all other gods” for having freed the Hebrew slaves from Egypt (Exodus 18:7-12).

But Moses’ father-in-law is not an Israelite: he is described alternatively as a Midianite priest (Exodus 3:1) and a Kenite (Judges 1:16).

Now, according to Bible, the Midianites were descendants of Midian, another son of Abraham, which again supports the idea of the existence of an extended family of Yahwistic peoples. The Kenites, on the other hand, are a tribe descended from Cain and described as living among all the peoples of the Levant and specializing in crafts and metalworking, which, according to Amzallag, is further evidence that Yahweh’s first incarnation was as a smelting god.

Note that the so-called Midianite-Kenite hypothesis goes back to the 19th century, when biblical scholars saw Jethro’s story as evidence that these groups introduced the Israelites to the worship of Yahweh. Amzallag seems to be the first to stress the metallurgical side of this hypothesis and link Yahweh specifically to the rites and cults of ancient miners and smelters.

Copper mining at Timna and at other remote sites like Faynan, today in southern Jordan, was central to the region’s economy, employing not just miners and smelters, but blacksmiths, traders and other workers in every town and village of Canaan. These people, identifiable as the biblical Kenites, would have been held in high regard and seen as being close to the divine because they possessed knowledge about the secret and mysterious process of copper smelting, Amzallag says.

Or maybe the god of storms

“There is no doubt that at least for the Edomites, and possibly for their neighbors, religion had to go hand in hand with what was their most important activity,” says Erez Ben-Yosef, an archaeologist from Tel Aviv University who leads a team excavating at Timna. “They depended on the success of these operations and they definitely would have felt they needed the help of a god in the complex smelting process and in organizing these mining expeditions to distant, arid areas.”

We have no direct proof that the metallurgical god, worshipped at the Edomite sanctuary in Timna from the 12th to the 10th century B.C.E., was Yahweh: there is no inscription invoking his name. But the kinship described in the Bible between the Israelites and the Edomites, and the metallurgical attributes of Yahweh in the holy text, are “compelling arguments” supporting Amzallag’s theory that this god was worshipped by multiple peoples as a deity connected to metallurgy, Ben-Yosef concludes.

There are skeptics.

“The theory is interesting but I don’t think there is enough evidence to say that the first worshippers of Yahweh were metallurgists,” says Thomas Romer, a world-renowned expert in the Hebrew Bible and a professor at the College de France and the University of Lausanne. There is strong evidence connecting the Israelites and the Edomites, and maybe the latter worshipped Yahweh as well, says Romer, author of “The Invention of God,” a book about the history of Yahweh and the biblical text.

However, Romer disagrees with Amzallag’s interpretation of the supposed volcanic phenomena described in the Bible. He thinks they are more indicative of a god of storms and fertility, similar to the Canaanite god Baal.

“It is quite common for storm gods in antiquity to make the mountains tremble, but is this really an allusion to volcanism or is it just showing the power of the god?” Romer says.

Iron trumps bronze

If, and that’s a big if, Amzallag’s theory is correct, a niggling question remains: how did this smelting god, worshipped by the semi-nomadic peoples all over the southern Levant become the solitary national deity of just one of these nations, the Israelites?

That may have had to do with the rise of the Iron Age, Amzallag says. Bronze is an alloy of copper and tin, two relatively rare elements. Iron is much easier to find and just needs to be combined with another common element, carbon, to produce one of the strongest metals known to man: steel.

By the 9th century B.C.E., copper production at Timna and the rest of the Levant had all but shut down and the process of smelting had lost much of its mystique. In the Iron Age, Mediterranean metal workers lost their elite status and were simply seen as skilled craftsmen rather than quasi-priests or magicians.

In parallel, their gods either lost their importance in the local pantheon and were forgotten, or were transformed, acquiring different attributes and characteristics, Amzallag says. Meanwhile, the loose coalition of Canaanite nomadic tribes who once saw themselves as descendants of the same patriarch, had morphed into a patchwork of small, centralized kingdoms, each vying for the status of regional power. Conflict became inevitable, and indeed the Bible is filled with stories of wars between the Israelites and their neighbors, who are invariably depicted as evil.

As each nation attempted to gain political and military supremacy over the other, the Israelites may have also tried to establish their spiritual superiority, depicting themselves as favored children of a powerful god, or, to use a biblical turn of phrase – a Chosen People.

“To gain primacy and become the chosen people of God, they had to remove the metallurgical origins of Yahwism and disconnect him from the other nations,” says Amzallag. But while weeding out explicit mentions of Yahweh’s roots, the editors of the Bible could not completely ignore the traditions and stories that were already an integral part of the identity of this cult, he suggests.

Yahweh’s fiery attributes or the stories of a shared Abrahamic origin for the peoples of the Levant are echoes of more ancient beliefs, he says, clues that remind us that “once there was no exclusive connection between a God and Israel. Initially, it was the God El that belonged to all.”

Basically, so then according to the Abrahamic religion’s very own fables time-history chronology narratives, during the times of the Hyperboreans and the Paleolithic Stone Age in Europe as pictured above about 40,000 BCE (and in India, Pakistan, China, Japan and in all of Asia actually), they would like people who have at least the common sense of at least a 5 year old, to faithfully believe their various anonymously mutating fables and contradictions-filled stories as being some sort of divine unerring truth of truths and holy unquestionable supertruths? that’s absolutely absurd though for lots and lots of proven valid reasons lol. For one, during the time pictured above circa. 40,000 BCE in Europe, then what was going on in ancient Canaan, Egypt and the Middle East in general during the same time period? Well, according to their very own holy news scoops scriptural timelines and revealed wisdom information esoteric mystical secrets from their god…nothing…that’s right absolutely nothing, why?…because it and the planet didn’t even exist yet. The Yahweh-Jehovah deity didn’t even open 1 snow storage house or tip over even 1 rain jar yet, before even 1 Leviathan sea monster was fought, heck the Moon and Sun didn’t even exist yet either, which was made after the Earth anyway. This would extend from the times of the Cro-Magnon Stone Age populations right through to the Mesolithic Period to the final period of hunter-gatherer cultures to the end of the Last Glacial Maximum Ice Age and Neolithic and Holocene Periods, and the different proven cultures and civilizations existing on the continent during those times who left behind their evidences. Which would mean that the much, much later Abrahamic religions so-called “history” is mainly anonymously written fabricated deserts stories and fables…..or on the other hand that the ancient Hyperboreans in this case, were either made by some other deity and then most probably transplanted on the planet from somewhere else (i.e. – already living in Europe and existing but completely unknown about by the biblical god), or that they only left behind allegorical and metaphor bones, pottery, artifacts and cave paintings etc, i.e. – only just deceptive illusionary abstract concept archaeological remains evidences that aren’t actually even real (probably “planted” by the seven Princes of Hell), primarily to test our faith and gullibility so as to see if the person is truly worthy of a future zombification to co-rule the planet (as well as to joyfully partake in the torture and destruction of the many numerous deceived fools who actually did believe the illusionary archaeological evidences instead of with faith steadfastly trusting the Yahweh-Jehovah god’s very own written words and eternal truths of the real world), that’s the only logical conclusion.
Basically, to be a so-called biblical literalist, preacher and/or apologist, you have to follow the example of reading comic books, it’s so simple even a 5 year old knows how to do that, i.e. – you can’t just read this and that comic book panel, skip a few panels then read a few more panels you agree with and then skip some more panels going back and forth all over the place using that system, reading only the panels you like or agree with then making up the rest and not even read all the panels which tell the story, what sort of a scoundrel fabulist charlatan would read a comic book like that? Who would even make a superhero movie based on reading their comic book that way? Exactly, to know how to properly understand the presented information/claims you have to first at least know how to read a comic book properly, ipso facto.


National Security Alert: Why Croatia (& other countries) Should Immediately Ban & Imprison Foreign Televangelists & Other Subversive Mind Control Cults/Sects (+Videos)

(Viewpoints and information presented here do not necessarily reflect the viewpoints of, nor should they be attributed to, FIS-Ski, FINA, IHF, FIFA, SAG-AFTRA, WFC, WWF, UPU, UNESCO, WMO, WWE, IWMI, ITF, ICMP, Yum! Brands, Inc., Phillips 66, Hostess Brands, ExxonMobil or their affiliates, directors or officers. All information found therein is from the mentioned sources (alleged and non-alleged sources, or rumors, fables etc claimed to be a source, in whole or in part used or argued for by the alleged source text narrative or by the individual and whatever it is that they are alluding to, presupposing or inventing to imply that said alleged sources may mean or may really mean if claimed instead to be allegorical or a metaphor, and/or their personal invented ideas which are then purported to be the source or a source for the claim presented as being allegedly a true factual source), and/or a common sense exploration rebuttal and/or personal known verified information retort opinion of this blog’s author vis-a-vis any claims, predictions, questionable or wrong information, threats or insinuations made or implied by said religion’s alleged “so-called” purported sources, whether if anonymously written or with inserted interpolations and/or applied authorship after the fact, or by the organization, cult, sect or by their organization’s representative leading guru, spokesperson, propagandist or follower/lackey etc, or by the person purporting to be the or a spokesperson and/or representative of the religion or of the claim being forwarded as being true and factual evidence, (this blog’s author does not consider any personal assumptions, dreams, hallucinations, hazy fuzzy feelings, prickly ears, hearsay statements (especially anonymous hearsay, anonymous fiction narratives and/or anonymous misrepresentations of actual known history and/or anonymously claimed unverified genealogies, blood magic powers, zombifications sorcery etc), plagiarism, out of context musings or groundless insinuations and ad hoc rationalizations as being a valid source of anything, all strictly as supplementary information for the benefit of the reader).

Well, this is my first official post here so I should give some general background information about why. This first post is largely a repost from another blog of mine, but that blog I started up as strictly a Croatia topics blog after coming back from my most recent vacation trip there (hence which better explains the original post title that I kept). That blog revolved around a wide variety of Croatia themed topics which I thought would be interesting as a benefit to the reader who otherwise may have been clueless about Croatia and Croatian topics and stuff…Croatian history, language, alphabet and literature, Croatian school system, military history and current military topics (I have a military background so I thought it made sense to include those), political history, as well as the current and past music scene and artists/bands, fashions, foods, beers and wines, recipes, hairstyles, bikinis and bikini history, (I did a few models and fashions posts of course for women’s rights), tattoos and tattoo history and the current tattoo shops scene and annual tattoo conventions in Croatia, occasionally sports posts about skiing, hockey, handball, water polo, martial arts, tennis etc, the Croatian television shows scene and film industry, Game of Thrones filming locations in Croatia and other filming locations in Croatia, shipbuilding, high performance electric vehicle manufacturing, computers, smartbenches, smartphones, internet (IoT) and software technologies, green/clean eco-friendly technologies, products and services, Croatian manufacturing companies and products of all sorts, electric trams, trains and transportation, animal and environment protection (especially the bears, wolves, lynx, dolphins habitat, forests and water conservation projects), medieval reenactment groups, ballet/opera/theatre, castles, forts and manors, winter cottages/chalets renting scene, archaeology, photography, painters, art/artists/art galleries, pubs, cafes, restaurants, Croatian names and surnames history, winter and summer and beach activities and events, and even including a few personal vacation photos and videos (However they repeatedly got in a tizzy and upset because of a few added images I used when posting about “women accordionists” (and they weren’t even my images or videos either), which may or may not have shown some “nippleage” because some were sort of artsy photos also (and there are lots and lots and a plethora of women accordionists and accordionists babes photos on the web believe it or not, definitely not your great grandfather’s accordionists that’s for sure and I’m actually surprised they didn’t force my blog to have a sneakers brand, some fast food corporate logo or a rainbow on the homepage)…basically it revolved around a whole bunch of topics, however most of the topics information was taken directly from articles and other international news websites sources so it was stuff already well known about and floating around the internet anyway. Besides, after already LIKE-ing, Thumbs Up-ing and commenting on every Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and Tik-Tok profile in existence and every cyberghetto social profile in the world, I’ve moved on to be part of highly classified and an intricate hidden collective of top secret internet sites and forums which directly affect pretty well all countries and governments on the planet including overseeing false flag operation projects and other highly confidential stuff, probably behind things you see on the news everyday as well as a few unexplained paranormal phenomena websites, and of course about the actual all too very real approaching oil and gas zombies apocalypse (for those who have absolutely no clue about any Croatia topics, some basic happenings and informational stuff for English readers can be found at croatiaweek.com, secret-zagreb.com, skijanje.hr, danipiva.net, www,hnk.hr, rijecki-karneval.hr, spancirfest.com, zff.hr, coolinarika.com, croatia.hr).

But anyway, then one day I decided to touch upon the topics of the spurious televangelists-scamvangelists charlatans and their happy-clappy fabulist minions, which I explain about why below in the repost. Because then one day I just had enough and felt I had to elaborate about the general subject and the related nefarious shenanigans, outright lies, obscurantism, the pathologically fixated and neurotically obsessed delirium acts, deception and especially the blatant fakery involved which reaches the point of disturbing and insulting also. The post was pretty basic and not that long at first, and then I found myself updating it occasionally (probably after channel surfing some day and feeling insulted as the scamvangelist/fabulist/preacher or just plain ol’ Jesus Junkie was making it seem like I and all the viewers are simpleton gullible imbeciles who believe anything and any hocus pocus fables just because they’re on the idiot box behind microphones, that we don’t have brains, reason or common sense logic to think for ourselves or eyes to read or see but instead need some consumed snake oil salesman/saleswoman to fill our brains with personally fabricated ideas, anonymously written fiction stories (that even they don’t know by whom, where or when it was written or even why most of the time…hint-hint scamvangelists because it wasn’t even meant for me or you or for even anybody thousands of years in the future, can anyone reading this teleport to thousands of years ago? then it may involve you) including magical superhero characters and hocus pocus primitive Bronze Age and Iron Age desert tribal blood magic cults, various personal (and contradictory) abstract concepts and ideas that aren’t even based in reality or the real world and cosmos, that as if our very eternity depended on their personal jimble jamble shows instead, I was totally disgusted with their insinuations that, such as in the Croatia example, that just because we don’t go around singing (“Give Me That”) “Ol’ Time Religion” that we were in danger of the eternal burning worms and pitchforking. Yep, I was even feeling victimized that the charlatan actor/actress on the idiot box was allowed to spread their personal psychosis delusions obsessive mythomania to the general public, and into children’s minds, and that if anything they should rightfully be put in prison instead for the safety of society and not be sent money to spread their tentacles further to conjure alternate bizarre realities and steal people’s real minds, personalities and identities (and their harvest faith seeds also of course which is the main prize).

As I continued to update the post occasionally now and then, it soon included more information and interesting facts-filled and eventually it had become the longest post in my whole blog, and I never even originally planned to post about the topic at all because it was the furthest thing from my mind, so how weird is that? Now after reading this post the reader may just say…”Oh you’re one of those unbelieving atheists etc…etc”, and to that I would have to simply reply yes…and no. Huh? whaaa? Whad’ya mean yes and no? Yep technically yes…and no. Why?…because if we’re talking here about the main deity character in all the Abrahamic religions, which includes Judaism, Christianity and Islam especially, who each claim to be followers of a one true real god, then I am absolutely definitely 100% an atheist and proud to be (Actually an atheist is better and more correctly understood also as a belief (“theism” meaning belief, the “a-” in “atheism” is understood as negation of the belief being claimed or presented) and as a proposition – something that is either true or false, referring to the propositional “content” of the presented belief, i.e. – according to the presented facts, details and evidences, or lack of evidences usually, of the presented belief and it’s claims, so the Atheist instead “believes” that the argued “content” of the belief logically using reason and known empirical facts warrants the decision to not believe (it’s practically not even a choice actually when understood correctly, more like a natural gut reaction common sense default reaction, e.g. – “Oh brother Billy here partake of this magical bread made with holy riboflavin and larva which will please the lord and keep away the wandering demon ghoulies”…”No thanks I’ll be an atheist on that one and make some stuffed peppers or throw something on the bbq instead”, or the fact of actually being required to believe ALL the presented written material, stories and ALL the claims being made, because there is no picking and choosing the parts you like or agree with and disregarding other stuff or instead giving it personal abstract meanings using mental acrobatics and everything is fine and dandy you’re still in the immortal faithful club (or just throw your faith shekel into the bucket once in a while then think you’re guaranteed to be a future immortal zombie, lol, that’s not the way the belief and faith biz operates because you have to accept the whole package as in everything and all the stories…young earth, flat earth, talking snakes, Jonahs in fish, rising zombies, floating outer space beings and hybrid humans, teleporting, ALL the visions, ALL the hocus pocus, bizarro adventure stories and desert blood magic sorcery, stopping earth rotation and moon orbiting, believing in ALL the holy righteous OT Yahwehism-Jehovahism genocides and killings and primitive behaviorisms, ALL the contradictions and customs traditions etc, etc, etc, you can’t just personally modify, mutate, change things or take only what you want to believe like at a smorgasbord or an all you can eat restaurant, because doing that is just admitting defeat and proves that the mythicists and real world historians, and archaeologists, paleontologists and scientists are right and correct ipso facto, and doing so would just make the person no better than any begging grovelling telescamvangelist fabulist charlatan), if the presented claims, stories, contradictions, wrong information and related mutated theologies, abstract concepts and primitive behaviorisms and beliefs are shown to be not valid…then obviously to believe in said arguments and presented claims the person likewise cannot accept them as having any validity…

…As for an “Agnostic” for them human reason is incapable of providing sufficient rational grounds and proofs to justify belief in the presented claims and alleged evidences of the belief in the presented god, or a god or gods or deity/deities or magical cosmic genie slave owning master butler genie being presented (Agnostics don’t consider abstract concepts that are not based in the real world as any kind of proof of anything, and faith in something for just faith’s sake without tangible evidence as not being a proof of anything either, only a time travel teleporting machine would help in gathering any proof or evidences of anything or corroborating anything claimed). Besides are the 3 Abrahamic religion’s “gods” the very same god as many of them claim and believe? (seriously, many of them think it’s the same thing and the exact same magical genie skydaddy cosmic butler) and that’s equally very problematic and absolutely ridiculous…lol, and is that the same god of the Jehovah’s Witnesses, Mormons and a plethora of other singular god based religions also as they claim? It’s impossible because of the mountain of contradictions and abstract concepts theologies at odds with each other and wrong information so naturally it’s impossible to believe it (unless the time travel teleporting machine thing like I said), an Atheist is sort of like an Agnostic except it’s where the Agnostic is Atheist-Lite and simply is of the opinion you can never know because nothing about the belief can be verified by anyone nor ever has been so it’s not a creed but more a methodology, many of them also sum it up very plainly that no deity or deities appear to be concerned about the fate of humans which would very strongly lean towards them not existing). I know for a fact that the main Abrahamic religions floating absurd skydaddy genie character doesn’t exist and is just the product of anonymous primitive worldview human minds inventing-writing things in the same general coterminous geographical areas in the Levant deserts and caves in the Bronze Age, and into the Iron Age of the very early Common Era, I don’t think for a second that all those anonymously written and contradictory-filled fictitious events, absurd characters and their weird abstract concepts and theologies are based in the real world, which will be better explained in the post with evidences. And I’m not technically an atheist because I simply don’t know, honestly I’ve never seen or talked to someone who came back from the dead or some other realm of existence or made Kool-Aid turn to apple juice or stopped the sun and moon in the sky, I’ve never seen or know anyone who’s seen or talked to a zombie with secrets from the beyond or…wherever. I’ve never heard or seen any of the contradictions speaking magical beings and magical superheroes that were all over the place in the stories and giving secret pointless news scoop tips and hints, have you?, or being able to do magical feats and various desert blood magic to really wow me to believe without a doubt with undeniable proof and evidence, heck if someone could do the things that they’re supposed to be able to do according to the supposed promises and magical powers, then I just might think they’re onto something and I might even go check it out. So you see, for scammers and charlatans to tell someone that they know without a doubt that what they’re saying/inventing is 100% absolute undeniably true and real is quite a ridiculous claim and utter hubris, (their “proof” and holy “evidence” being a few tattered and torn papyrus scraps with anonymously written contradictory theological ramblings stories to a few other fellow cultists somewhere but from many decades and even centuries after the alleged story was supposed to have taken place, some scraps being just a few words and no bigger than the size of a credit card, wow that’s pretty convincing valid 100% evidence actually…for a believe anything dufus perhaps), especially when you factor in all the related competing and contradictory abstract concepts and offshoot cults, sects and theologies from the same general sources and all of which were basically arguing with each other. As far as I’m concerned and even according to their very own written sources and narratives, all these Abrahamic religion’s main deities are more like pathetic confused bumbling absurd contradictory ball players on a field under the lights in a stadium on a spinning dirtball in frozen space in the backyard of the real landlord and powerful whatever, they’re puny personal butler skydaddy genies invented by even punier primitive minds who didn’t even know the world was round or what germs and illnesses were (i.e. – they were germs, bacterias, genetic abnormalities, diseases and corresponding sicknesses and ailments…not wandering demons, fiends from the heavens or requiring Bronze Age and Iron Age primitive desert blood magic theologies solutions as the one and only correct answer for the entire planet). Even among the many idiotic and nonsensical (and contradictory) actions and quotes attributed to the Jesus character in the gospels novels stories, one is in the Mark novel narrative where he is absolutely clueless about the spreading of germs, bacterias and viruses and the important yet simple concept of basic handwashing hygiene and washing utensils/cups as a positive preventative measure against them and being unclean, because instead he’s of the opinion that only words and things coming out of the mouth are unclean not things going into the mouth. Prognosis; clueless just like the talking snake thing, but in this case it’s even promoting the spreading of germs and diseases and ultimately innumerable innocent deaths, even 5 year olds know enough to wash their hands after the bathroom and playtime, so not a very bright or even a basic common sense character or author.

Yep, so I guess I could be categorized as an Agnostic-Atheist-Realist or something like that. All I do know is that even the term “religion” is a convoluted word and labyrinthian term having many meanings, and that it has been unequivocally shown and proven in many instances and in many ways that today’s major religions are purely man-made, ipso facto, all of them rising out of particular cultures during specific times and circumstances that the religion initially revolved around and was meant for, then as is proven to be common over time it mutated, changed, was added onto with religious and cultural syncretism from other religions/beliefs/myths and fables and then mutating some more etc. And so for a very long time and today, in no sense am I follower of Yahwehism-Jehovahism or any of the Abrahamic religions “faiths”, which makes me about as unbiased as someone can be, probably much more so than any of the present-day writers on the Abrahamic faiths topics. And so the word “religion” then has lost all meaning and relevance, whatever is really going on behind everything is just way, way, way, larger, more real and important than all these puny primitive mutating myths and in many cases absolutely absurd ridiculous man-made so-called “religions”.

(Which reminds me about all that “faith” business chatter, I mean c’mon let’s get real here, when there’s no evidence or proofs about something, something written by someone somewhere about someone at sometime or about something somewhere in some language or another, and especially when it’s contradictory nonsense that’s proven with evidence to be otherwise, the word “faith” then becomes meaningless, no amount of mental gymnastics will make non-real things into real. You might as well just truthfully replace it with the word “hope” because that’s what it really is, the person is just hoping something is real and true, otherwise any religion can do that, it’s just “Hope-ium”. e.g. – faith that the Noah’s Ark story is a real historical thing involving real historical people and events…that Joshua was a real historical person who really magically stopped the rotation of the earth for a full day (to make the sun and moon stay still in the sky overhead for extra daylight) so he could win on the battlefield. Heck I could start a religion tomorrow where we worship a head of cabbage deity, we could wear robes, have matching tin foil hats, sprinkle cabbage juice as holy anointings and chant in unison about how we all have unwavering faith in our religion and abstract theologies, we have faith that the planet Kepler-452b is made of cheese or inhabited by purple beings, what’s the difference?…none, it’s just hoping something is as you think or believe or want it to be. There even already are many religions today who likewise have absolute “faith” that their religion is the right way and some sort of eternal truth, (quite a number of them even blow themselves up for it), it’s really ridiculous how unfounded “belief” in something that is factually not proven or true is in reality just “hope” that it is. And boy do telescamvangelists milk that word for all its worth, it’s one of their favourite words and constantly used on television and their book titles especially…”faith seeds”…”faith seeds for the harvest”…if you have enough faith you can drink poisons, have anything you ask for, enough faith will result in all sorts of miracles, even be able to raise the dead and move mountains if you just have enough faith. It’s really all just “hoping” you can do various things and get various results, it’s just hoping what you believe is true, so the word faith is pointless in those instances and boring. I want to see first hand that faith at work and the promised floating mountains and zombies all over the place).

In the meantime though I’ll just occasionally add stuff here once in a while while trying to keep it fresh and entertaining but also factual and interesting, I probably may still have some posts included that are Croatian related, maybe about the archaeology and Croatian Pre-Christian pagan times and some other topics that I already did (including the Upper Paleolithic, Mesolithic and Bronze Age periods in Europe) as supplementary interesting background information about the same general theme and subject, maybe even repost some Croatian unexplained paranormal phenomena and ghosts posts that I did. I’m not a science nerd but perhaps even some science topics that are in the same general ballpark subject. This below repost although fairly long is only just the tip of the tip of the tip of the iceberg, so strap on your helmet and goggles because over time it should be a zany, wacky and interesting ride…


Well, It’s a Sunday morning and readers on this side of the pond everyone knows what that means. I’m finding all the local botched drug deals, shooting and stabbing news kind of routine and boring too, (all their mugshots and social media selfies are really not all that great either), so I updated this post with some recent news and then added my own personal commentary, I reposted it already once before but now is as good a time as any for another one. Because brethren, as you know, this is verily the blog of truth. Oh sure it’s Croatia related in various ways, but it’s also the blog of truth. Some of the facts you may already know, some perhaps not, some facts may cause you to wonder in awe about a lot of things. You may wonder in awe or stare aghast in shock and disbelief at how these various hair styles, fashions, antics and charlatans are even allowed to be on television to spread their philosophies of filth and lies, or to even walk freely in public in the first place. (What if they hear voices telling them to do some really crazy stuff to people around them or next door or in the same room? what if their God tells them to kill people? To decapitate someone? What if God tells them to go kill a whole bunch of people and strangers like he’s already done lots of times, he might command it again. You can’t disobey God’s voice can you? That would be a sin, it’s unthinkable, it’s the law because it’s God’s word and you can’t argue with that). Either way it’s all extremely important information for the benefit of the reader. But mainly to help make sure you’re not worshipping the wrong gods or god or skydaddy, who just may be impersonating another god with the help of his earthly and spirit in disguise minions as well as subterfuge aliases and different names, so as to steal your mind, real history and even your real identity and make you only think you’re following the real gods instead of the fake thief god who will tell people to act irrational, perform desert voodoo rituals, believe rubbish nonsense, to go kill, and praise his kills and smiting slaughters, a god who uses different names and constantly contradicts himself many numerous times but says he doesn’t (but he does).

You see, the enemy is constantly trying to tempt you with empty and made up promises, ludicrous alternate universe fables and fake contradictory stories which are nothing but musings by obscurant obsessed lying miscreants and history inventors from long ago, (e.g. – not believing in the history of tectonic plates, sedimentary layers, natural world processes, geological evidences, Ice Ages, real cosmic laws and processes, continental drift or dinosaur fossil records etc, to instead believing in talking snakes and donkeys, that grass and plants existed before the sun and moon, that rain falls from rain jars, that leprosy is cured by sprinkling bird’s blood 7 times using another dead bird as the paintbrush, that the sun and moon can stay still in the sky for a full day and putting to death practically everybody who wouldn’t sacrifice as per etc or follow precisely every word of Levant deserts Bronze Age and Iron Age blood magic priests and worship their hodgepodge concocted contradictory desert tribal deity, who strangely got duped by a talking snake in his very own garden and numerous other contradictory hocus pocus failures and nonsense), all in the hopes of subversively stealing your mind, personality, identity and then replacing it with a confused and nonsensical mishmash of fantasy like a sly subversive Cymothoa Exigua attaching itself into your brain, telling you to believe folly and groundless absurdness and finally to try to get you to wish and pray to become a fool, i.e. – a modern day blithering automaton needing other worse fools to tell you that you don’t know how to read, think, use your eyeballs to see or ears to hear, to, in effect become a pathetic suspension of disbelief theologies believer and mindless minion follower. 

You will have to say “no” to that foolish and nefarious subversive Cymothoa Exigua they want to implant in your mind to become your new mind if you truly want to be wise, set free and know the truths. You’ll have to pick it off from your mind and throw it to the abyss in the cosmos (….”Everlasting farewell Cymothoa Exigua! I pick you off from my mind and soul, I cast you into the frozen space of time where you will have to suck and feed on another flat earth, passing comet, asteroid, blood moon or space junk, you will have to attach your tentacles to the shadows of rocks in space and live there instead on your way to the black hole until you are no more. My mind and body is my own and will remain free and real and full of truth, the real world is my world not your obscurant imaginary concocted nonexistence reality and puny universe ruled by absurd blood magic fabulists, failed charlatan prophets, error-prone tribal deity genies, fiends from the heavens and puny bit part playing fiction actors in a desert cult script to be performed for galavanting sheepherders and other primitive robed bric-à-brac. For we know the Hyperboreans girded their loins and subdued the mountains and grassy plains and they tamed and hunted the wild beasts of the forests thousands of aeons before your universe and world was even concocted, Hyperborean babies suckled mother’s milk and sweet nectar and fresh honey made from Hyperborean bees legions of millennia before even one baby was put to the sword by Joshua and his loyal minions, Hyperborean gods made the winds and snows fall with just their mighty blowing nostrils not from opening doors to a floating crickety-crackety shed, lightning and fire was brought down as gifts by their fiery eyes for warmth and cooking meals and not to burn and kill loyal followers and enemies alike, verily the Hyperboreans charted the skies and cosmos to know the seasons and moon cycles and to know when the rivers rise ages before even one talking snake knew he existed or even one rain jar was tipped, they traversed the landscapes of the glacial epoch before your imaginary planet earth and universe was even made, thus now you gird your loins as an answer-excuse before your inevitable doom (thou may very well be the “God of the Middle East” yet that is but a puny hill of gnats to the Hyperboreans and their real world and universe mighty creator overlords who laugh at your failed blood magic spells buffoonery and false trickery schemes, with each failed spell and scheme being just another nail in your coffin until it also will become a home for gnats having great feasts, enjoy then your feast well gnats and rejoice), your fictitious pathetic carnival creation and employed desert devils, angels, madmen servants and hocus pocus blood magic sorcery has not served you well and they instead sealed your fate, how ironic?…or is it?…that the real reality existence and cosmos has from the beginning confounded your mind and no desert marionette-minions you ever conjured can save you now…for they bid you farewell also just as the feeding and feasting gnats do (your only hope then would be if some future “gnat king” or “king of the gnats” should try to surreptitiously restore you to your former place and throne of the desert, yet even he cannot raise what has already been eaten, “not even the eaten sheep and goats will be raised” the Hyperboreans steadfastly proclaim and thus it is so)…Oh nefarious Cymothoa Exigua phantasm of dross and lies”), something like that.

Famous Canadian fake faith healer showman and temples shekels faith seed charlatan abomination Benny Hinn. ”I banish thee evil spirits with a wave of my manicured hand, (or jacket, proof below later), I banish you to Hades then later the land of the Canaanites and some other places.” (Look Benny! another shmuck in the 3rd row with their checkbook and pen out, the pew potatoes really enjoy our mumbo jumbo, the Lord he is truly great and swell!). Btw, most televangelists and 8 out of 10 of their lackey fans believe the bible was originally written in English and that the Jesus and all those other prophets superhero characters spoke in an Alabama-Texas drawl accent (aka “that ‘Ol Time Religion” whatever that means).

This isn’t really all that related to the Croatian stuff that I usually do, but since it’s Sunday and I have some free time, I’m going to quickly do this one that’s been a long time coming. (I really hate these actors and their acts, lines and phoney antics). Anyway, this is the kind of stuff that isn’t on televisions over there. Never. Usually on Sundays there it’s mostly some sports and other local entertainment shows or movies (probably surprising to many is that soccer is really not that popular in Croatia and hardly anyone actually even goes to the games, and that the ski slopes are better attended in non-spring and summer months, seriously most people don’t care about who might or might not kick the ball or where they might kick the ball or should have kicked the ball etc, it’s more about the sports betting or just something to have on television at the local bar, your interesting fact of the day). Even if you don’t have satellite and 500+ channels, you still get in some programming from other nearby countries usually from Italy, Hungary, Germany etc.

Just really think about this one, you really don’t even have to think hard to figure it out (It might even come with that famous pigeon on the bottle), I don’t know if it’s olive oil or canola oil so if its’s also good for salads and frying pork chops and scrambled eggs or not, if anyone has the inside news scoop on the hocus pocus oil let me know.

I should also add that over there there aren’t any of those midnight/early morning televangelist programs either, and absolutely none of those 24 hour televangelist related channels. (Unless of course it sneaks through on satellite somewhere). I’m not going to touch upon any of the other religious programming that takes place, to me these types below are the kings of the glitzy bacon dancin’ preachin’ carnival shows, the supremos of wacko-ism fake fraudsters deliriums and the late night Sunday god-o-tainment business. (I kid you not, I repeat there are absolutely no televangelists on television at any time, you could channel-surf all day and night to your heart’s content and not even come across one of these types of fake know-it-all lying fraudsters, actually not even any religions programming). I went with 12 highlight videos at first but then I started running into just so many of these fraudster scamvangelists and neurotically consumed and obsessed purveyors of fables and alternate universe abstract concepts videos on Youtube (and others related to the topic), although even some regular infomercials I could have easily thrown in here also.

Uh-Oh, popular apostle-witch John Hagee having yet another spurious neurotic delirium rapture mythomania episode and filth prophecies shtick perspiring moment about a puny addleminded and contradictory absurd Bronze Age blood magic desert tribal deity (aka the nefarious “God of the Middle East” , “The Serpent-Maker God”, “God of the Mesopotamian Garden” etc), which is weird because he’s based in Texas but thinks he’s teleported back 2,500 years ago in the Middle East, how weird is that?), a tribal deity that was largely imported from Mesopotamia, Canaanites and especially using the ancient Zoroastrian’s theologies…GLO-RY! (and he really likes pointing a lot for some theatrical reason, what’s up with that?, pointing here then over there then pointing over there and then pointing all over the place, he also has a weird fixation with blood, primitive Bronze Age and Iron Age deserts blood magic, washed in blood, swimming in blood, drinking and blood pouring all over the place like some sort of holy hocus pocus esoteric Middle Eastern butcher shop, and strangely predicting that people who don’t fall for his speeching scams are going to the egyptian eternal lake of fire hell (aka hell these days), what an abomination filth purveyor in a JCPenney suit pretending to be a preaching egyptian zoroastrian prophet guru), using his fabulist mental gymnastics he also strangely believe that America is really Israel full of Jewish people and that Jerusalem is the actual real capital of America yet he begs for dollars instead of shekels, which sure is strange the way I see it and probably heretical, I don’t know why but lots and lots of these types, including a number of the ones I’ll mention later, have some sort of weird abstract fixation psychosis about also believing that they’re really Jewish and so all descended from a fictional Abraham character who was a rich wandering traveling many camels and slaves owning Babylonian magus sorcerer guru from Ur of the Chaldeans/Mesopotamia (i.e. Iraq), if that’s not obsessive alternate universe delusions then I don’t know what is, (he, and many befuddled minions like him, believe jesus was god…but also the new adam…but he’s also god…but still nevertheless he’s adam…but also god…he’s god and adam..he’s adam and god..???..but where’s the new eve?…clearly textbook cases of delusional and schizotypal personality disorder just like many of the magical thinking biblical characters actually, who likewise thought they were special and getting secret esoteric cryptic messages and ideas planted into their brains from outer space) because then I’m descended from a Bronze Age Japanese super duper Ninja Samurai Wizard guy (ouuuu, he looks intense and upset, because his delusional dark gospels filth blood moon prophecies psychosis and holy secret gematria numerology hocus pocus calculations failed yet again so now he may be turned into a bloody pumpkin pie and crucified as god’s punishment which will surely complicate further DVDs and book writings for the holy tax-free temple coffers).

Unfortunately, even just the case of the delusional psychotic paranoid schizophrenic fabulist John Hagee seen above, and similar fantasy purveyor gurus out there they are not just isolated cases by far, (who since has passed on the temple keys and reigns of his own personal blood magic fantasyland death cult empire organization and some of the temple coffers to his son…surprise surprise, not really though that’s the way the scamvangelist biz operates), as there are a plethora of other similar charlatan purveyors of filth and alternate universe bizarre beliefs and wrong prophecy-predicting schemes and magical predictor powers (which btw according to the “good book” and his god’s very own commanded laws is deserving of death, all these types seem to always forget that or accidentally skip it when reading for some reason, each and every time too so that sure is weird).

WOW it’s the god’s apostle-witch prophet on earth, LOL. Even after getting the delusional secret esoteric cryptic messages planted into his brain from outer space that transformed him into yet another in a long list of OT Texas failed prophets, he’s still waiting for promised locusts who sting like scorpions, multi-headed horned beasts and dragons to come out of the sea and a space alien horseback invasion…and for lots and lots of sacrifices and bowls for some reason, these delusional fabulist cultists types still don’t get it and refuse to accept the real world reality because they refuse to admit that their superheroes and their primitive Bronze Age God’s failed predictions and promises in some ancient novels were just plain failures time after time, no amount of mentally teleporting to thousands of years ago making things up and selectively cherry picking fables and ramblings to invent other and even opposite meanings of what is written, will ever change the real reality results and real universe existence, it’s just self-deception and brainwashing yourself (and others) to make your imaginary universe in your own mind take precedence over reality (it’s just plain creepy and dumb that in the 21st century someone is being so obsessively neurotically fixated on bowls, giant sea beasts, locust attacks and dragons of all things, either that or dang that is some fucked up homemade drugs and strange brew hooch that’s for sure).

As the reader will become much better informed by the end of this post, they will know that the speeches and sermons (and their many books and DVDs also of course) of these types are really only blatant mentally imbalanced personally invented filth jimble jamble ramblings of sick, neurotic and deranged people. Preachers, (so-called preachers, pastors and self-styled apostles and witnesses anyway whatever that means) who are completely fixated consumed (possessed, probably by their very own conjured demons in their minds) with their made up fabricated abstract concepts and fake histories, obsessed with their Bronze Age and Iron Age desert blood magic sorceries fictions fables and ancient deserts religions astrotheologies, with floating fiends from the heavens and their primitive Levant death cult alternate universes, blood magic cult magicians and associated hocus pocus, daily incantations worship fixation of a hodgepodge concocted tribal deity phantasm largely borrowed and adapted from the older ancient Mesopotamian, Sumerian, Zoroastrian, Canaanite, Egyptian and other Levant deserts religions, anthropomorphic bizarre hybrid beast-creatures and imaginary human-creatures hybrids “visions” and alien space beings, zombifications, phantasms and ghosts, universe melting and skull-crushing failed apocalypses and prophecies (so many failed prophecies and apocalypses with even opposite results happening which explains why other wrong predictions keep needing to be invented, and they sell lots of books and DVDs too which is good news for their temple’s coffers), and again more primitive blood magic, hocus pocus and genocidal killings fixations, that they think that their’s is the actual real world and real cosmos existence.

Actually it’s obsessive obscurant filth ramblings that is so primitive, so filled with absurdity, proven errors, contradictions and statements proven wrong in so many cases that they actually should be wearing old stinky dilapidated robes, sandals and have grimy long beards, rotten teeth, sand in their ears and nostrils and traveling on camels to their carnival filth parade temple shows just like they did back during those ancient deserts blood magic hocus pocus times. You’ll see that they take a snippet of an anonymously written verse here, part of another one there, throw in a few words and symbologies from a failed prophecy or two or three and throw in some personally conjured up misinformation and fiction, mistranslate what’s written in the text, distort, falsify, redact, omit and/or change information and known factual reality, twist meanings and invent new alternate meanings and abstract concepts to further mesmerize the ignorant, feeble-minded and nodding-applauding gullible pew potatoes to agree, clap, buy books and even send more faith shekels seeds to further the diabolical work of the particular charlatan purveyor of filth desert blood magic sorceries and his primitive personal death cult organization and their misinformation propaganda gospels. It really makes you wonder how these types are even allowed to be on television and hold gatherings in public in the first place, or allowed to even exist to spread worship of their Abrahamic heavenly fiends and alternate delusional universes, and stranger still even hobnob with presidents, politicians and getting into the voters and politics biz (since when did Bronze/Iron Age Mesopotamian, Zoroastrian, Canaanite, Egyptian and their borrowed and adapted pagan Levant religions abstract concepts, hocus pocus stories, primitive blood sorcery tribal deities and erroneous cosmic and world views become something that must be emulated and worshipped in the 20th-21st century? and absurdly that even the entire planet must also worship and follow the same fabricated degenerate desert blood magic filth theologies, all towards some future imaginary demented tribal Yahwehism-Jehovahism deity theocratic dictatorship kingdom ruled by floating priests and imaginary OT failed superhero prophets over freshly made zombies? pfff as if, more about that later).

It seems the whole time that despicable televangelists do their contradictions and fiction nonsense jimble jamble shtick for faith shekels seeds they think they’re doing the world a favour by making things up all over the place, suited mental patients experiencing regular psychosis episodes on stages and behind microphones neurotically consumed (possessed) with spreading their own personal invented and con-cocted brand of Yahwehism-Jehovahism fixation deliriums universe to wow the feeble-minded, hocus pocus purveyors of their dark gospels. In this case just preaching the diary of a madman and babbling at the moon made-up mumbo-jumbo garbage, as well as filling peoples and children’s heads with all sorts of his fabulist mental gymnastics, demented abstract concepts doctrine-philosophies, absurd imagery, fables and other vile con-cocted filth not based in reality or the real world. You don’t scare or fool me Mr. Fake-Wizard of Oz Liar, I’ve never seen any hybrid multi-headed multi-bodied winged, horned and crowned beasts out of any sea (unless you count those huge tunas some people catch on their boats, sometimes just one of those tuna could easily feed a family for a year easily), people squished in a winepress and blood for 200 miles reaching up to the horses bridles (200 miles of blood up to the horses bridles people wake up! Put your horses on the roof and get your rubber boots while you still can for cripe’s pete’s sake!!!) or hordes of locusts with stinging scorpion’s tails and speaking with voices like thunder and dragons. Make the bear, lion, rock, sea or bird into an angel, or into a demon, into God or into the Devil, make a fish into a Jesus or a Jesus into a faceless swordmouth or a horned creature into a fish and then into a beast with wings and multiple different heads and many other things in the cosmos into anything you want, don’t forget to throw in a bunch of scrolls, lots and lots of blood, altars and sacrifices and of course trumpets all over the place (there always has to be lots of trumpets of course for the zany suspense mood). For preaching bullshit fraudsters with net worths from 10’s of millions to over 300 million dollars personal net worth and expecting a rapture any day, they sure do write lots of books, Praizzze Gawd! (Strangely many televangelists are so obsessively consumed with all sorts of absurd contradictory fables and hogwash desert civilizations theologies from storytelling Bronze Age sheepherders that they even think they’re Jewish for a bunch of weird and pointlessly lame reasons and even that Hebrew superheroes characters are Christians on the same team because Jonah was in a fish for three days and other absurdities, (Muslims believe that too I should add, because they insist all those old testament superheroes are actually Islamic superheroes, more about these topics later), their cultic contradictory fables, deliberate obscurantism chicanery and obsessive biblical deserts Yahwehism-Jehovahism universe deliriums really know no bounds).

Because the reader should keep in mind, that right from the start the ancient and later various Abrahamic religions, like telescamvangelists today, has been a smart hustle that made a good living for a lot of charlatans and many, many lazy bums. There was no welfare in ancient times, so if you did not own land then you were the slave of those who did. But if you were a soothsayer, a new religious guru or proselytizer and carried around “Secret Books”, “Secret Scrolls” or “Secrete Knowledge”, then you could start up a pretty good hustle. The Nobility were often very superstitious, and often consulted so-called “Holy Men” on matters of state, and war, how best to give yourself clout and prestige and even authority than by inventing and making up glorious past histories, past characters, past events (and predicting futures also of course) and eventually lots more invented stuff and lies as the means to the end.

In a way, this is sort of a humanitarian post when you really think about, actually it’s a post about fundamental basic human rights, the right to be protected from any Cymothoa Exigua, the right to not be exposed to or influenced by or forced or coerced or tricked into believing any concocted thinking patterns and behaviorisms that are not my own free thoughts, the right to free will and use common sense reality in my real personal world in the real universe, not some other person’s or group’s agendas, propaganda and mental gymnastics fake universe rigmarole (the same goes for my basic human right in not having to mindlessly follow, believe, support or be a servant to any particular political movements, fabricated so-called societal norms agendas propaganda (or odious trendy abnorms), or various media and television fads and concoctions), and I’m warning people about the tentacles that are outstretched and ready to snatch them and force them to sing gibberish then hop and dance like drunken frogs on speed, maybe even wear strange clothing and other bullshit garbage, it’s much, much worse than any Shopping Channel fashion jewelry and moisturizing cream chit-chat. So if the reader is from Croatia, here is just a small sample of the kind of stuff you miss out on. Even if you don’t understand a word of English, I don’t think it will really matter.

(I decided to come back and update this addition after originally posting it. I got to thinking how this topic reminds me of Mormons and Jehovah’s Witnesses and those similar types. Readers over here will probably know what I mean. Even the last time I was in Croatia I noticed a few Mormons in Zagreb and in Rijeka who came over from Utah, which really made me laugh, not laugh as in funny but just really pathetic and absurd. (Elders Todd and Glen I think were the ones in Rijeka and Elders Burtis and Daben in Zagreb). It’s remarkable, I was there on vacation to not even think about those types and here they sneak in trying to brainwash the people trying to enjoy their lunch at the table next to me. Going around just like here to tell the people who just came out of the downtown ice cream shop whether they know that bla bla bla and this and that. That’s because when you really think about it, it’s frikin ridiculous and absurd. There we have a case of 2 recently out of high school types who just finished some kind of 6 week indoctrination bootcamp or whatever, and then all of sudden they ship off to even foreign countries to do some kind of mission…their abstract concepts fictions shtick and book of magical stories stand up act.

Were Velociraptors “raptured”? The bible characters never mentioned it, but then again there’s no reason not to believe it because why would they have roamed and ruled the earth for millions of years if they weren’t meant to be eventually raptured? (Velociraptors lived about 75 million years ago, and did you know that a “raptor” is a bird today, yep, pigeons, gulls, turkeys and KFC chicken is actually a bucket of raptors, amazing).

You see, there you have instances of where the newly pep talked to and freshly indoctrinated individuals (with their new shirts, ties and fresh polished loafers) are then sent off to save, witness, preach, enlighten…whatever, to even people in other countries. They are now off with their backpack and name tag to explain the mysteries of the universe to people even in other countries, to people who speak other languages and who drink cappuccinos and who always drink those imported beers and wines. (that last part was a joke, get it)…Only the good places and neighbourhoods though you’ll notice, even around here it’s only areas with freshly cut lawns, lawn ornaments and Ikea furniture, they don’t even think about going in their suit and ties to the drug and crime filled parts of town with the candy eaters, glue-sniffers and cologne drinkers, drug rehab centers, shootings, stabbings, and bingo halls etc, you know…places that supposedly need their guidance, expertise and knowledge etc.

Always with the miracle water kit, oil, holy trinkets bric-à-brac, dirt from somewhere and DVDs and books, what is your major malfunction miracle-boy? Only feeble-minded minions would fall for this fake invented jimble jamble spurious garbage and send this stooge money.

Think about it, so it’s off to the nicer locations and far off more or less normal countries to let people in on the mysteries of the universe, the meaning of life, the mind of god, the truths since the days of the dinosaurs, Mormon underwear sizing, how to pronounce correctly really long made up names of made up superheroes from the book of Mormon, etc. Isn’t that strange, weird and absurd? (The book of Mormon is actually just nothing but really, really, really, really boring voodoo witchcraft btw, technically it’s just an egregious emulation of black magic or most likely just some kind of Utah voodoo). So off they go freshly scrubbed and brainwashed to foreign countries and lollygagging around their ice-cream parlours, bakeries, museums, restaurants, art galleries, promenades and the model-filled walkways of Zagreb, Rijeka, Vienna, Munich, Paris, Oslo, Prague, Warsaw, Rome etc (aka those foreign carcass megatropolises who need the holy ghost anointing and lots of pamphlets)…off to teach those people their filth and the mysteries of the magics and the mind of God, telling the people their reason for existing, to even tell people about the history and even the future of the universe and all this before they are even old enough to drink a beer at the local shitty and grubby bar in their hometown (besides, there’s already lots of churches there, plenty of churches and church ruins all over the place, some of them are over a thousand years old and some even centuries older, heck practically every country in Europe has tons of churches all over the place, nobody is prohibited or being told they can’t go, if you want a church by all means there’s a church there, there and over there enjoy yourself if you must, and besides plenty of people check them out who aren’t even religious anyway because of the art and architecture and history involved just like looking at old Greek and Roman buildings and ruins these days, so there’s really absolutely no need for foreign churchy types or cults and sectarian gurus and minions trying to set up shop from across the ocean, those churches have been around way, way longer before even cable television and starving faith shekels seeds scamvangelists were invented). How about that? That’s pretty bizarre if you ask me, and actually sort of a contradictory hubris.

A measly 1000 bucks will get you into heaven or me a new gazebo and golf clubs (Always with the endless seeds, sowing and harvest shtick, shouldn’t they be farmers or just be doing Farm-Aid instead? it makes much more sense.
The proper way to sow seeds for an actual harvest, it’s really not that complicated or even involve addressed envelopes and pens or hocus pocus, plus you get actual real yummy fruits and vegetables instead of lying shitbags abstract concepts drivel which is a really good deal, and makes better stews and pies too. Example: sowing seeds for a harvest.

You see, because scientists, historians, geniuses, archaeologists, paleontologists, astrophysicists and philosophers also, hundreds of thousands of them and probably many more, since from time immemorial and up to today have been searching for proofs and clues about the meaning and functioning of the cosmos, about the galaxies, planets, stars and black holes, about real life and the natural world around etc (and about how the miracle sand, cloths and water works also probably). But ohhhhh, instead now this guy with the backpack and name tag was perhaps struggling with grade 10 geography in high school not that long ago, (maybe he wasn’t even sure where those cities I mentioned earlier were located on a map), Ohhhh, now all of a sudden after mission boot camp he has the answers to your and everyone else’s eternity and understands the mysteries of the universe because he has a new clean shirt, a name tag and some free pamphlets to give you, some even have slogans and cartoons. Forget about those scientists, historians etc that I mentioned about earlier. Now they’re doing you a favour and letting you in on their truth because otherwise you’re lost, ignorant and no better than the philistine favela and bush people and their ways, how’s that for bizarro-world? As for the Jehovah’s Witnesses and some other organizations, they’re almost the same except they have different name tags, go to different buildings and they get their haircuts on Wednesdays instead of Fridays. The worst of them are the ones that are the most popular and on television, they make up stories and weird abstract concept dogmas to the extreme and literally prey on desperate and ignorant people giving them false hope of miracle cures and often incurable diseases, as well as that all their dreams will come true and maybe even win the lottery, if they have enough faith of course. (They’re competition in that department also don’t forget, each one of them is trying to get a piece of the lucrative faith pie, which will most importantly get them more members and envelopes mailed in).

God told me his shocking ancient secret mumbo jumbo, now you have to pay to find out what it is. Click the link below and don’t forget he takes credit card, cash, frequent flyer miles and food stamps also. Praizzze Gawd get ready for an amazing ancient secret money miracle, free shipping and handling! (btw if there’s any readers in the CHCH broadcasting area feel free to call them to keep this and other similar invented jimble jamble lying charlatan tax-free scamvangelists actors off the programming schedule, people can just start up their very own invented verbal diarrhea tax-free blood magic hocus pocus shekels seeds donations scam, it’s really easy people have already been doing it for thousands of years, and if not for yourself at least for your children we need to keep the poisonous tentacles of this delusional mind control garbage off the air…or perhaps that’s the intent from the start?..for kids at home to break their shekels piggy bank that they were going to use to buy a comic book or send to the sick kids but instead to send off faith seeds to the company scam temples of these societal degenerates purveyors of televised filth sewage, that’s just disgusting).

Basically, it’s like this. These types are just actors. Very bad actors at that, yet very good actors also, depending on who’s their audience even the lousiest actor can be a gifted blessed miracle man preacher. Lots of these types will also get into the “author” biz. Oh yeah, actually these days hardly any of them aren’t “authors.” You see, it’s quite easy being an author in this racket, it’s just more or less the same stuff you see on stage. You don’t even have to know what you’re talking about, the people in the seats lap it up like a dog lapping up water on a hot day. It’s a simple math and equation being an “author” such as them. Just pick a sentence in the bible, any sentence, any sentence at all…

…Now just make sure the sentence includes at least the word…”miracle”…or “miraculous”…or “reap”…”God”….”love” (don’t pick the word “hate” though, that word is in there a lot and god and the other superheroes prophets and characters are hating all over the place constantly, if they’re not smiting, killing, destroying or sacrificing one thing or another they’re usually hating, prophesying disasters and slaughters because of god’s hate and complaining lamenting most of the time), along with torture, burning, destroy, slay, kill, plague, stone, sores, blind, lepers etc, but they’re not good words for “authors”, “publishers” and of course for “banks”)…”sow”…”tenfold”…”hundredfold”…”golden lamps”…”bowls”……some other good ones are “scripture”…”heavens”…”heavenly”…”temple”…”tithes”…”truth”…”truthfully” and/or a few others, you probably will want to throw in the word “unequivocally” now and then also for emphasis to show that you really know what you’re talking about (…”And I unequivocally say again that…”…”The bible unequivocally demands that you…”…”The holy ghost is unequivocally clear about such and such…” etc, etc).

Then all you have to do is throw in that one word you picked and the chapter/verse where you found it, then just wing it like on the stage, concoct all kinds of stories, futures, pasts, events, things that never happened, all kinds of bizarre scenarios and situations, pour on the abstract concepts, amazing promises and prophecies etc, and then just throw into your book the above words once in a while and it’s technically biblical, the word of God and the truth. (enter trumpets and epic music). Make up some weird absurd meaningless pointless book title and you’re good to go, you’ll sell tons of books (Look at just how f***ing easy it is, there verily are an eternal ocean of morons ready to buy and believe anything once they get into their “Ol’ Time Religion” delirium (whatever that means), just one example, the hair is optional thankfully). That just about sums it up. You see, the vast majority of time that these types talk or write, it’s just all made up. You can transform things into whatever you wish, anything at all. Make the bear, lion, rock, sea or bird into an angel, or into a demon, into God or into the Devil or into both at the same time, make fantastical absurd beast creatures and things in the cosmos into anything you want. whatever suits your purpose and book plot. It doesn’t even have to make sense, it can even defy the laws of the universe and reality but the most important thing is that you remind people the chapter and verse of one of the words up above that you slipped in, I mean that you used. It’s that simple. Knowing the chapter and verse of the word you used is all that really matters because the rest is just personal jimble jamble filler.

It’s strange that the “Biblical God” character totally approved of and even commands murdering, genocides, cannibalism, slavery and “Biblical Jesus” said “Slaves, obey your earthly masters”, but eating pork, lobster and shrimp is wrong and a sin (Mmmmm…pork chops and garlic butter pan-fried shrimp is all I have to say). Many scholars have noted that Dystheism (the belief that a god is not wholly good and is possibly evil) has existed for many thousands of years, as shown by trickster gods found in polytheistic belief systems and by the view of other representations of supreme beings (especially portrayed in the Abrahamic religions, particularly the Old Testament), and with the biblical old testament tribal deity Yahweh-Jehovah clearly showing attributes and vestiges of the earlier polytheistic trickster gods, where god decides to become malevolent and unreasonable to satisfy it’s own whims and personal satisfaction…committing murders, genocides, blood hungry, plagues, disasters, diseases against his loyal followers and enemies alike, as well as demanding the following of primitive and contradictory laws, traditions and orders.

Heck, you don’t even have to know anything about the bible at all, literally zilch, zero and nothing, just know the chapter and verse of the word you used, the rest is easy. Actually, I think most of these types definitely should be spending more time “reading” books and sourced material/documents/historical writings in different languages and sources as well as scientific data, the last thing they should be doing is actually “writing” a book because books have to be based on and about factual things when it comes to writing about facts, you can’t just make up facts as you write along. Heck, when writing anything at all, even comic books, lots of irreligious types also like to make a fish into a Jesus, or a horned creature into a fish and then into a person, make pigeons into ghosts, make an adjective into a noun, even make the Moon, stars or planets into God and the Devil at the same time because it makes for zany drama and suspense. I rest my case, you see it’s just all the same entertainment/god-o-tainment book writing biz).

Despicable abominations filth shitbags Joel Olsteen and Creflo Dollar are just 2 of the plethora of well known spurious televangelists getting into all sorts of scandals, their main shtick is babbling in nonsensical fake languages, fake miracles and making up all sorts of personal abstract concepts and ideas that have absolutely nothing to do with the real world or reality.

On top of that, after a while you don’t even have to mention the bible or any quotes at all. That’s when you can just start writing and talking about the whole “it’s a special relationship” thing. Now it’s all just about some imaginary special personal relationship between just you and Jesus, or God, or some saint or the Holy Ghost or whatever. Everybody can have some kind of personal relationship and getting special messages from outer space into their mind. At this point you can just write about how it was the Lord who spoke to your heart, about how Jesus said this to you or God told you that such and such. Pfff, you don’t even need any bible now at all actually. You see, the creator of the universe has decided to have a personal relationship with you, just you, and talk to you personally, you are a real somebody now and special, somebody really something that the being(s) behind everything that exists in the universe talks to you personally, picking you over everyone else in the world while you were doing your laundry or chopping onions. Wow, you are blessed that the being(s) has taken such an interest in you and your problems over everyone and everything else going on in the spinning dirt ball in space. “Oh, and Jesus told me that….” or “Glory be, the Lord filled my heart with his words and told me that such and such….” “God let it be known to me, so that I knew what path to take for his glory, he filled me with his truth” or ‘Amen, the spirit filled me and spoke to me, telling me God’s great plan and Jesus’ wishes”, maybe even what kind of shampoo to buy, how much to give to brother Popoff, where you lost your library card… Wow, How about that?, now you can just speak with them personally through figments of your delusional imagination and dreams and secret news scoop hunches so you don’t really need any scriptures, scrolls, real history knowledge or facts, bibles, books or even any written sources.

You don’t even have to own or read or know anything about any books at all actually, now just “the Lord” and master of the universe himself will tell you personally because you’re special and a real important somebody now with real important stuff to do that’s important to the world and him, he’ll send angels to guide you and give you feelings and hunches and opinions so you can spread stories to save the world, sell books and so you don’t screw up the map driving directions and be late when going to the carnival or theatre.

(Whatever you do though, do NOT talk to God about or mention in your new book anything about ancient civilizations, about archaeology, especially about dinosaurs and dinosaur fossils, Neanderthals and the Eurasian Cro-Magnon populations, about archaic extinct humanoid species populations, no talking or writing about snake vocal chords, just only write about what happened after Adam & Eve and that’s it). So it seems now you can talk with God(s) or others while taking a shower or cooking dinner because now you have a “personal relationship” and they will tell you secrets and all kinds of things, delusional voices and imagined feelings will show you the way and give you lots of stuff to write books about, so many stories to be told because now you’re really a special somebody and suddenly know lots of things that others need to know. Maybe even while brushing your teeth or when you’re on the toilet you will be filled with amazing heavenly sent personal information and secrets, voices spoken directly to you personally in your mind and implanted in your brain from…whoever. Wow that’s really something, you should write probably lots of books now).

It’s very easy starting your own religion these days since the advent of the idiot box, with even approving and clapping herds of lackeys and feeble-minded minions supporting you and your new spurious imaginary invented religion, such as another bs and nonsense rubbish lip-flapping despicable filth specimenscamvangelist seen above…[enter 6 Million Dollar Man theme sound effects]…Joyce “20 million dollar home” Meyer, the spiritual Pamela Voorhees of televangelists. What does this absurd disturbing chicanery even mean exactly? Is this a proper way to be walking around the mall and airport showing off your new shoes while eating oversized cookies where even children would be forced to witness the ghoulish nightmarish abomination spectacle? (as if the cookie is some sort of absurd trophy or holy talisman connecting her to the most wisest mind of the universe to write books), talk about overcompensating for her cookie and shoes delirium especially after her botched plastic surgery, she even supposedly gets marriage and relationships counseling inside scoops and tips from god himself, lol, God the relationships therapist and sex counselor with dildo news scoop tips even way better than Dr. Ruth, I recommend her best-selling classics “How To Hear From God” because it’s probably full of zany adventure and suspense (Did you hear that? You and everyone can listen to secret news scoop tips from the god personally like a personal butler or cosmic genie so there’s actually no need for Joyce Meyer, you can get secret godly news scoops and tips directly no need for a middle humanoid), and of course “Living Beyond Your Feelings” and “Power Thoughts to Win the Battle of the Mind” because seriously who doesn’t want to win the war against your feelings and your mind? Your feelings and your mind must be defeated by fiction mumbo jumbo and that’s the truth, you’d be crazy not to). And her “Second Coming products” such as the Jesus Dildo will ensure that dildoing is done the right and scripturally correct holy way and not like the Jews, Jehovah’s Witnesses, Mormons, Baháʼí, Muslims and others (in some telescamvangelist circles aka the “Immaculate Erection”, however that seems very unlikely and absurd being that the Jesus and disciples characters in the fiction fables were usually just talking pointless contradictory nonsense stories in the desert with their heads in the clouds while making zombies and exorcising demons most of the time so they probably couldn’t even get an erection which is a sin anyway deserving to be chopped off). Besides let’s get real in the actual real non-televangelist world, people instead want and deserve zany adventure books to know how Abraham a rich wandering travelling many camels and slaves owning Babylonian magus sorcerer guru from Ur of the Chaldeans/Mesopotamia could possibly be the founding father of Christians, Jews, Mormons, Jehovah’s Witnesses, Baha’i and Muslims as claimed? and be the great great great great great etc grandfather of the Jesus character?, because that’s quite a problematic contradictory conundrum and actually very absurd, real thinking people deserve better than that to ponder with their giant cookie and new shoes. Look at just how easy it is….Brand new books out next month order yours today…”Let God Be Your Interior Decorator”, “Jesus Filled Our Shopping Cart With Anointed Blessings From Zion”, “Lighten Up, The Holy Ghost Is 25% Off And Free Shipping”, “The Lord Is King And The Only Banker And Plastic Surgeon Your Soul Will Ever Need”…”The Lord Makes The Best Cookies Because The Holy Ghost Is The Baker” …then you just build on the book title with all sorts of invented horseshit and pointless fluff and it’s a bestseller guaranteed, commercials and everything. (see also Books and Letters written by Jesus who’s also probably the best author of all time).

These types really make me laugh when they start preaching and feeling on their soapboxes, or from behind their desks and microphones. Feelings this, spoke to me that, babbling on quoting pointless meaningless words and chapter/verse quotes that even they don’t know who wrote it or what they mean, just moving on to chattering about their views and feelings and fantasyland now, just rambling on like it’s some sort of information that’s really important and that your life/eternity depends on it, (putting the bait on the hook before reeling you in to your doom, unless of course you become their brainless lackey stooge, very sly tricky bunch). Heck, explain your views and feelings now about cilantro vis-a-vis parsley, or how the Lord or Holy Ghost (whatever that means) spoke to your heart and mind that people should use clarifying shampoo once a week to get rid of buildup and have more softer and luxurious hair etc, write a chapter about how such and such a chapter/verse shows that we really should think this way and not that way about whatever. It all amounts to invented personal pretend world pointless personal feelings chatter that makes me wish they really were talking about cilantro vis-a-vis parsley or shampoo ratings.

Joyce Meyer – a genuine irrefutable apostle-witch and result of 2,000 years of mutations and today undeniable and unequivocal proof that the biblical god does not exist (and from the looks of it she’s most probably the Revelation’s Great Necromantic Blood Magic Zombie Whore of Babylon riding the Seven-Headed and Ten-Horned Beast clothed in purple, and you do have to admit she sure as gosh darn diddly darn dang ding dong doodly darned likes her purple outfits that’s for sure, it’s the prophetic sign fulfilled so keep your eyes open out there in Missouri).

From there you get to different variations, different denominations and then eventually even cults, sects and other strange so-called “churches” or just religious groups. That’s where you throw in some UFO-angels stories, reptilian shapeshifting world leaders abducting Bigfoots from Atlantis and hiding them in the pyramids and at Olmec tombs and some other things. There you have a case of just adding even more made up stuff and choosing different words as your sentence/chapter-verse source. One thing you’ll notice however, like I said earlier, most of these types ignore scientific facts and evidences staring at them right in the face practically, facts and reality are not a part of their feelings-fables equation and never has been. Even numerous experienced “Bible scholars”, professors and people who study these things their whole life, they readily admit with evidences from the text source material and archaeological evidences that most of the most well known biblical stories are just plain personal tribal theologies agendas and propaganda of anonymous Bronze Age tribal writers, primitive blood magic mysticism behaviorisms, allegories, borrowed and adapted astrotheologies, abstract concepts and basically mostly fiction superheroes and magical events. Basically a case of either outright inventions (Adam & Eve, talking serpents, Noah and his closed boat door and animals, the man living in a fish without drowning, the Devil tricking God into tormenting Job with plagues and sores and killing his family all just for a bet or some kind of demented bragging rights or something, or to teach you a lesson that you better do this and that or else) or extravagant and ludicrously improbable exaggerations written down many centuries after the event or person in the story was supposed to have happened and existed. Written down hyperbole with some fantastical “miracles magic” and events thrown into the story to really “wow” and “gosh” the readers and listeners. Hey, let’s make the sun and moon stop moving, or let’s make cereal fall from the sky, heck turn people into salt and let’s have lots of plagues and whining lepers and zombies. (You will also come across tons of examples of Epimenides paradox , coincidentally in Croatian we have the saying “Ti si kreten i majmun drek i bezveze” when someone doesn’t know what the hell they’re talking about or are just bullshitting to audiences and being pointless). Every preacher and book writer just follows their own personal brand of Confirmation bias anyway, just selectively using flaky imaginary characters or cherry picking wishy-washy obscure anonymously written text to prove their pointless made up personal views with abstract concepts and then ignoring the mountain of contradictory text and meanings and evidence at the same time, just spinning the fables excerpts into hard or paperback personal fable version books. Of course for the Jonah in a fish for 3 days story you won’t need any suspension of disbelief at all, because that’s quite possible and probable. (aka the “gospel truth” and being so true that it’s “super true”).

I don’t have enough space here to elaborate about this disturbing abomination, Ernest Angley (the one with the gigantic matching purple snotrag in his front pocket) is basically known as the weird talking toupeed fake-healer and bullshitting guru-host of fake miracles television shows for many decades, he’s even come back from the dead a number of times not just once. Praizzze Gawd!

It’s basically that well known recently coined term “Suspension of Disbelief” actually, it’s the exact same process except these days it’s Hollywood, European and other movie film writers, directors and producers that employ this method, for thousands of years before the magics of filmmaking they only just wrote the suspension of disbeliefs on the back of the skins of dead carcasses, then later something resembling paper. (The psychosis sometimes reaches such an obsessive fixated level that some people will believe there is no suspension of disbelief at all, that instead everything written is truth and real and even super real, that a mountain is a river, even that God made your child blind, cripple or have an incurable disease because you wronged him somehow in the past, or just to teach you a lesson). That’s why there’s no archaeological evidence or historical written sources backing up what was written later.

(The Abrahamic religions adopted Zoroastrian Devil fictional character shown for illustrative purposes only, not an actual photo)
Ironically, according to the bible Lucifer is described (actually intentionally mistranslated and taken completely out of context because the text is actually referring to someone else, but anyway) as a highly exalted perfect freedom fighting angel leader who’s beauty is flawless and breathtaking (what the heck happened too much Butylated Hydroxyanisole and Sodium Nitrate in his diet and he had horns implants?), although even this portrayal from Isaiah 14: 4-21 derives mainly from Babylonian astrotheology about the planet Venus (Lucifer is the Latin name for Venus) and the text is actually speaking about the King of Babylon and so it’s mistranslated, cherry picked and taken completely out of context (i.e. – made up and fabricated, makes for great movies though). More about this much later invented (and borrowed from other older and Mesopotamian/Zoroastrian religions) character who actually started out as a personality trait of Yahweh-Jehovah God and his palaroonie friend helper, then turned into an angel agent who personally works for and carries out punishments and suffering “for” God with his full support, then as a position of authority to be an accuser and adversary, later he becomes a metaphor and symbolic representation of innate human qualities, and only much later still he is transformed into a powerful separate entity with a powerful kingdom and armies of his own angels who took his side (because the greatest minds and thinkers in history are always in the minority not the majority as the saying goes), having his own vast realms and even authority as Lord of the Earth and visible world who is at times a helper to humans (eventually given horns, cloven hooves feet, pointy tail, red face, knobby knees, pointy chin and ears, goatee, bad breath, pitchfork, echoing laugh and sometimes even a nefarious cape etc). Very interesting also, even the very concept of “dualism” between a mighty Devil and God characters being in eternal conflict, of wandering demons floating around the earth as well as even the whole concept of an eternal burning hell punishments and burning punishments for eternity with the fire and the burning hellish burning torment fire and the Lake of Fire of eternal burning and hot anguish burning until almost burnt etc, all these ideas and concepts (as well as the attached astrotheology and future rising zombies beliefs) were only much later introduced and directly borrowed and imported by Jewish scribes and priests from other surrounding religions and especially from the Egyptians and Persian Zoroastrianism religion and their beliefs, (even the customs of circumcision and being forbidden to eat pork has much earlier tradition origins from them also, particularly because the Egyptian god Set murdered his brother Osiris and would transform into a black pig as well as being an enemy of Horus, thus the taboo of eating swine still being a religious prohibition among Jews and Muslims even still today because those religions sprang and grew in the same geographically and culturally coterminous Levant area which included ancient Canaan), see also Classification of Demons which could very well mean that the Devil-Satan-Lucifer is really just one of many Devil-Satan-Lucifers with God being the main one as you’ll see later.

There’s absolutely no Egyptian mention at all actually, none whatsoever at any time that has been discovered that backs up what was anonymously written in Exodus and lots of the Old Testament, nothing by any other nearby nations and their leaders and writers either. Nothing mentioned or recorded even later referring to something even remotely similar happening from that time or any time by any other peoples either…ever. It’s also quite interesting that the majority of biblical scholars believe that Exodus and the first five written books (Pentateuch aka Five Books of Moses) were a product of the Babylonian captivity (6th century BCE) and completed with final revisions only during the post-Exilic period (5th century BCE) and a growing number of biblical scholars of the opinion that probably even later in the 3rd century BCE, it’s even generally accepted that the Moses superhero character portrayed in the books did not author or write any of the text material because of the numerous contradictory information and chronologies that don’t add up, impossible time sequences and natural world/cosmic processes, wrong verified known historical information and time travel/alternate universe scenarios etc (To put it in perspective, it would basically be like all American historians, as well as all Canada, Mexico and South American country writers, never making any mention or commenting at all about the Abraham Lincoln or JFK assassination, about the American Civil War or even the events of 9-11 up to today, just simply left out of the news and newspapers and media everywhere…never recorded, commented about or mentioned by any historians or anybody, nobody talking about it or writing the smallest mention about it…as if it never even happened…just crickets, just like the many other biblical instances of fabulist wow-ism). I’m not even going to get in the whole Neanderthal DNA, Cro-Magnon man, various mostly extinct archaichuman populations, Early European and Eurasian Human populations and migrations, long forgotten civilizations that are many thousands of years older than the whole universe is supposed to be according to the charlatan book writers/stage and microphone verbal diarrhea jimble jamblers.

The bible scene (Genesis 32:22-32) where Jacob takes on God in a wrestling match that lasted about 60 rounds “all through the night”, God lost. Best wrestler and headlock ever and “Neewww Canaanite Heavyweight Champion of the Wooorld!” (Later after Jacob was given the new name Israel, he went back to his 2 wives and female slaves and celebrated that’s for sure, this desert god is such a ridiculous chump stooge that he can’t even beat a puny human, pfff that’s just ridiculous). Btw, the very name “Israel” literally means “fighter against god” or “the one who fights/wrestles against god” (Yisrael). More information HERE and about him and then his sasquatch brother later.

When you have biblical experts and scholars even telling you that it’s basically mostly invented stories and incredible exaggerations, because they’ve studied all the sources for decades, then that has to mean something. That’s right, scholars who have studied all the oldest ancient biblical sources readily admit that most of the written events and many times the people characters, probably never existed. The only thing is, they write their findings based on actual proven sources and evidences for the benefit of the reader, not to sell books or sell holy tap water and fake miracles to help you get a bigger welfare check or hamburgers falling from the sky to feed your hungry family.

Doctor said…”Don’t wait, call the number on your screen”.

Maybe the reader still may not understand what I’m talking about, many of the types I’m talking about want you to just believe them on “faith”, to believe only written words in the bible as the absolute truth based on “faith,” (Well, just the words or points that they point out anyway). However, this is just plain nonsense and self-delusion, it’s more accurately described as “hope”, you just “hope” something will happen and hope that coincidences and probabilities will go your way because if it really was faith then “it would happen”…everytime, it’s basically “Hope-ium”. Look, here’s an analogy, and remember, your eternal soul, existence and afterlife will depend on your decisions and beliefs likewise…..

Jimmy Swaggart came back from the dead again? But we’ve already got too many Jimmy Swaggarts abominations already as it is. (Which reminds me, and more about this later, did you know just how easy it is for anyone to become a so-called “Pastor”? It’s so easy that any pointless shmuck on the street who knows how to read can become one, how do you think all these scamvangelists and telescamvangelist specimens started out? It’s so easy you can even take an online course and presto-magico become a pastor in no time, and practically overnight be wearing impressive name tags with “Pastor Bill” or “Pastor Jill” or whatever your name is, it’s so easy anyone with a grade 3 education can become a “pastor”. And you won’t even have to know ancient Greek, Hebrew, Aramaic, Latin or any of the languages actually used to write the stories, you won’t have to know what the words mean or even know real history or science, heck no, you won’t even have to know who wrote the stuff, where or when it was written or who it was actually intended and written for, heck no, just only be able to memorize just a few lines here and there and just make up the rest and imaginary b.s. Then in no time you meet even just 5 people once a month or week and it’s your church now, then you can even baptize people in a pool which many pastors do, and then come all the great tax-exempt status, loopholes and tax-free faith seeds blessings. Because it’s just a business remember, being a “Pastor” is only a job description not a qualification, then you can write books about anything inventing all sorts of nonsense for your fans and put your name on the cover…”How To Talk To Cheese by Pastor Pete” or “The Wisdom & Blessings Of Listening To Cheese with Pastor Dave”, “Let Cheese Into Your Life For True Blessings”, “Let The Voice Of Cheese Speak”, “Cheese’s Prophecies Today And What It Means To You” and of course “Discover The Truths & Ancient Secrets Of Cheese by Pastor Bill” or whatever your name is, you can then also likewise just make stuff up and now you’re an “author” as well as a “pastor”. LOL, it’s true, then you can even organize retreats, conventions, cruise ship holidays, trips, all sorts of events…with “Pastor [enter name here]”, and the main thing is you really don’t have to know anything or even know what you’re talking about just mainly invent meanings and make up lots of horseshit, you’ll even upgrade from comfy sweaters, polo shirts and slacks to suits and ties with a wall framed pastor certifcate as a bonus, even fancy plastic name tags not just the peel and stick on name tags. People will be amazed and in awe of your newfound pastoring gabbing powers and pastoring knowledge (Oh and did I mention you will also become one of the world’s best and most eloquent lying professional beggars? yep, day after week after months and years and years of honing your professional beggar skills, among the best beggars in the world actually), the neighbours will mow your lawn for you and kids on the street will be joyfully greeting you “Hey Pastor Dan! that sure is great looking luggage, where you off to this time Pastor to Afghanistan?!” What a great racket and easy tax-free faith seeds because of your new lackeys and duped feeble-minded fans, you’d be crazy not to, you’ll never have to shop at Walmart again).

You are a passenger on a jet airplane about an hour before the plain should start its descent to approach the runway and land. But the pilot and co-pilot both strangely suddenly die of a heart attack. (Too many fried foods, undercooked salmon maybe, I don’t know why, they just did). Some passenger stands up from his seat and says. “I once was thinking about becoming a pilot, I read all the manuals, dozens of them, I studied videos, did simulations using the information at home, I think I know which controls to use and get this plane landed without crashing, it’s common sense and will come back to me I’m sure, I think I can land the plane and save our lives!”. Then some other passenger gets upout of their seat and says “Behold dear brethren, I have the faith, all one really needs is faith in the word and that faith will land this jet airplane through me as the Lord’s instrument, it is only through our faith in what is written by God that we can all be saved and get this plane landed safely.” Someone asked the 2nd guy, “Well, do you know anything at all about jet airplane controls, what they do, how to use them to land the plane?” He replies “No, nothing, but I have the utmost faith that I will land this plane, it is only through faith that we can be saved, the Lord will save us by making this plane land if we just all have the faith that he will do it.” So, if you are the other passengers who are going to decide which guys hould take a shot at landing the plane, who are you going to choose?…

Step right up folks I’m making a miraculous camel dungpile right before your very eyes, Praizzze Gawd! GLO-RY! (Look at the guy in the blue dress shirt, he gets a 9.8 out of 10 for great technique and a superlative finish, without a doubt this gif should be included when Googling for the internet definition of “dregs of society”, and probably “stupid white people” and “shit for brains freakshow” also, heck probably “suspension of disbelief delirium”, “overcompensating for failed delusional expectations”, “pointless white trash”, “televised psychosis displays”, “blood magic filth shenanigans”, “Abrahamic religions voodoo trash circus” and of course “hocus pocus fraudsters” too and a bunch of other fitting terms actually).
There has never been a documented case where even 1 televangelist performed any measly miracle for any kids at the Make A Wish Foundation ever in history, but in 2013 Batman did. Batman: 1, Televangelists: 0.

…Pick the guy with some basic fundamental knowledge about operating and landing a plane and who seems to understand the basic principles and controls involved, or just go back to your seat, put on the seat belt and have faith that the other guy will miraculously land the plane? All just because he has the faith that he will do it. (He has the faith that he will do it dagnabit! Dam you all unbelieving fools he has the faith!). You can similarly try this out at home yourself sometime actually, just hop in your car and step on the gas aiming towards a high cliff then step off the gas but don’t brake, as the car is still coasting fairly fast just have the faith that the car will come to a speedily and safe halt before going over the cliff. That’s a pretty fun and easy exercise to try out, let me know how it turned out and I might do a post about it. Good luck with that and don’t forget to send some pics and video footage.

This farcical ridiculous Garden of Eden adventure is the earliest biblical fable involving humans and it’s a story that will be revisited and explored later, (just one of 4500+ year old pagan Mesopotamian-Canaanite-Egyptian and other Semitic people’s pagan magical characters, ideas, abstract concepts, stories and fables, as well as Zoroastrian, Greco-Roman mythologies and astrotheology etc that found it’s way into anonymous biblical author’s world views and deserts behaviorisms), and right from the start people are misunderstanding and televangelists-preachers erroneously retelling the text that is actually written, by them simply blaming the Adam and Eve characters for being duped by a talking snake, but when all the written information of the fable is understood in context and clearly shown by the written transpired events, the very first “person” or thing to get duped is not them, the first one to actually be duped in the narrative is…god, that’s right, the supposed most powerful and most wisest “all-knowing” god character of the story was caught absolutely clueless just a few pages into the novel and got duped by a talking snake (How embarrassing, walking around his garden and asking “Adam where are you?…Who told you that bla bla bla?”, yep totally clueless it seems and definitely not a good hide ‘n seek player either). It’s a very major snafu blunder and the reader right from the start of the novel gets the strong feeling that this main master of the universe god deity character is not very bright or as “all-knowing” as he claims and keeps reminding to other characters that he is, which sets the tone for later plots, characters and stories in the novel. More about this later.
“God Said It…I Believe It…That Settles It” as the saying goes…The Hebrew concept of “the universe” during the Old Testament Biblical superheroes times is actually the forerunner to those Flat Earth Theory people who are still around today, according to the Yahwehism-Jehovahism beliefs Earth was within a dome and the blue sky was even believed to be a wall of water floating in the atmosphere with literal pillars supporting the flat earth which had ends, rain was believed to be God tipping his rain jars and snow was kept in the snow storage houses, that earthquakes are caused by god’s anger, that there were no rainbows before the Noah superhero, that the Moon has a light of its own, that stars fall from the skies etc…etc…etc. Also according to their understanding and knowledge of the known world which consisted of mainly just the Levant, then in the corresponding map seen above Europe, Asia, Australia, North America and South America would be located in outer space somewhere and not on the flat earth disc, it’s pretty easy and plain to see that the newly concocted Yahweh-Jehovah tribal deity was just their “God of the Middle East” and without a doubt was never a God of the Danube, Alps, Carpathians or Mississippi, Ural, Ganges rivers etc. However, even this wrong world view as well as many other biblical views, beliefs, events and legends characters actually directly derive from the ancient Mesopotamian religion, and even elements from ancient Egypt. i.e. – from the religious beliefs and practices of the civilizations of ancient Mesopotamia from since 3500 BCE, so it’s clear and strange, but not surprising, to see that the Hebrew Jehovah-Yahweh God gave secret news scoop tips to his writers to basically copy ancient pagan cosmological world views and religious beliefs and stories, adapt and personalize them and then pass them off as his own. You’ll also soon see that lots and lots of ideas, characters, legends, beliefs and views were borrowed from them also.
If you read the bible without believing it, if you read it and realize it’s just another people’s national myths and folklore, just primitivism and a bunch of stories and mythologies written by obsessively superstitious people from the Bronze/Iron Age deserts – then it becomes increasingly apparent that they attributed the most circumstantial events and psychological traits to their god (aka “God of the Middle East”). After reading it you can then ask yourself does this sound familiar? Is this the same “real world” you live in or a world you could easily step into and just continue living and thinking and acting as usual alongside one of “their world” characters and their world thinking views and behaviorisms, or vice versa? (I guarantee if you did teleport there you would be stoned to death in no time just as god commanded), Or does it sound much more like fables and fiction characters? The bible and Abrahamic religions screams out loud of an ancient desert peoples who knew nothing of psychology, natural science, earth science, physics, astronomy, geography, coincidence, human fallibility and even cases of basic biology and hygiene, it’s a book that actually even celebrates ignorance in those fields, where anyone hearing voices was experiencing god talking and angels or demons under every rock and behind every bush. The writings and character’s quotes come across more as absurd kitsch comedic drama with a penchant for the distasteful and even warped demented side. Click open the image of earth for full view of the universe.
…And if the Nephilim were on the Earth before but also after the flood in ancient Canaan, did they make their own ark also or did they sneak onto the ship hiding in the hay?, or were they just really good swimmers? or they just simply teleported to the future? And since they were made by the “Sons of God” does that mean they’re brothers of Jesus? But they went after women and Jesus was a fisher of men, so that’s weird (why not just go fishing for fish it’s not homoerotic enough? that’s why it’s called fishing after all). Could the Nephilim live under water for a while like Aquaman then reappear again like as if out of thin air?

Let’s face it, do these televangelists/scammers really know anything that this Jesus character purportedly said? He said, supposedly, some pretty crazy and weird things
you have to admit, if he or anyone ever even said them
, according to the much later anonymously written contradictory accounts stories, whoever, wherever and whenever they wrote them. Also, I noticed that if someone wants to double check and make sure they know what they’re talking about and believe in, they usually find out they’ve been believing wrongly, no mention of seed faith gifts, envelopes, miracle sand, oil or a miracle cloth at all. The opinion of one very experienced scholar that I came across was that even if he did exist according to the fables, he still comes across as nothing but a leader of a small group of traveling hobos, and that he had serious delusions, was most likely mentally ill and had disturbing self-identity issues and episodes of delirium about being a god, we also know he would have been just one of a number of many other similar self-professed leaders/gurus characters doing similar and even exact same miracle shows which was something very common during those times and areas anyway, there were holy “saviours” rising from the dead characters in written sources even saying and doing many of the same things centuries before because it was sort of like a popular fad in the Levant deserts, it was their thing.

Basically according to all the biblical stories, the gist of it is that as soon as you acknowledge your right to free will and to think and reason as an individual being with a mind and life experiences of their own, then you automatically instantly become an enemy of God and must be smited and smote for being in cahoots with Lucifer (who’s actually the planet Venus in their astrotheology, but we’ll borrow from the ancient Mesopotamians and Zoroastrian ideas and make it a Devil-Diabolus character for zany suspense).

A complete stranger rapes your mom or kills a family member then burns your house down and shoots the dog, you’re supposed to instead turn the other cheek and “love” them? Someone assaults you and robs you of everything you own, so instead give them your last piece of clothing or coat and “love” them? Hate your family but love genocidal murderous criminals? Hmmm? That sounds like a great idea, if you’re a deranged serial killer or just robbed a bank or live in another make-believe universe of opposites logic where vanillla ice cream tastes like tabasco sauce. These are strange foreign customs and abstract concepts of deranged people and filth morals basically.

Makes a great board game, look at that concentration, how can that not verily be true?!

Another very learned scholar with over 30 years of thorough study and expertise explained that according to his findings, “without a doubt even he was a completely concocted story and an imaginary moron.” Many of his colleagues agree he was a preposterous invented character with no historical evidence of existing (not in any recorded material from his alleged time or for many decades afterwards by anybody), that he had the most preposterous contradictory words attributed to him time and time again, and the fact that much older deities, legends and characters accomplished the same feats attributed to him much later, and even cases of the same rituals, which again prove he was largely a composite fiction. And very interestingly, he noted that if people were to acknowledge and live their lives according to even just the various words of the Jesus character (the purported words, parables, contradictory commands, ramblings, stories, hints, advice etc, allegedly spoken by or attributed to him by whoever at some point somewhere anyway, and lived ONLY by that), then Jesus would be completely useless and irrelevant to Christians (unless you want to teleport a bunch of demons into swine so as to make them into pork chops easier).

WOW! It’s the holy ghost what more proof do you need? even just this guy alone deserves an entire blog, actually each scamvangelist does (also able to cure every disease and ailment in the world as foretold for 16 seconds, why are not all these slapfest miracles all over the news? For shame American network news, for shame).

Also importantly, if you want to be one of these types of authors, you’ll have to be a better author and make-believer than even the authors of the bible, much more better. How so? Because let’s get real, there are so many contradictions found all throughout the written material. These days you can’t write a book you want lots of people to buy or believe using those kinds of rules. For instance, and this is right from the bible, right from the very start the reader is left confused because it’s contradicting itself on a massive scale. That is right from the very start the reader is clueless as to what is going on. Genesis 1 gives the “Creation Story” where “God” (Gods and deities/powers actually and truthfully, because the original Hebrew used word is “Elohim” which means plural “Gods”, they’re all in the same club of El who was the first original Hebrew god and god of most other Canaanite peoples and ancient Mesopotamians, all the deities/gods together make up the “Gods club of El” or “Elohim.” (Lots of ancient Hebrew names are directly derived from the name of the god EL, everyone knows that…”Isra-el”, “Dani-el, El-izabeth, Micha-el, Immanu-el, Haza-el, Ari-el, Samu-el, Hana-el, El-isha, El-isheba” etc (Danel was a mythical Ugaritic hero and we know a lot of Jewish mythology is adapted from Ugaritic and similar surrounding cultures, so most assuredly the biblical Daniel character is also mythical. The two names even mean the same thing (Daniel, “God Is My Judge” in Hebrew; Danel, “God Is My Judge” in Ugaritic), and many, many numerous other names and place name/topography examples, (in the Hebrew bible Hagar calls him by name El Roi – “the god who sees me”). Actually, a large number of scholars, researchers and archaeologists from over the last century especially agree and have put forward undeniable evidences that the origins of the Israelites is from Canaanite origins, which today is the majority consensus even by many believers and Jewish researchers and scholars. The culture of the earliest Israelite settlements in the land of Canaan and their cult-objects are clearly those of the Canaanite god El, also in the Hebrew bible it is the name El (Elyon, Elohim, El Shaddai and sometimes Baal) used many times when talking about their god Yahweh-Jehovah, it all points to the very evident and not surprising very common process of Canaanite religious syncretism. Just watch the first few minutes of this video which explains a little better what I just briefly mentioned, it’s much more complicated and things involved than just Charlton Heston, fake hocus pocus and faith seed harvests)…

…Where the the “god/gods” make different things on the different days, including all the plants and animals and then finally humanoids (both male and female) on the 6th day. Elohim then rests on the 7th day. But wait a second here, just a few sentences later in Genesis 2 it says that “God” (The name is Yahweh actually, now it’s a specific single he who’s name is Yahweh and no more “We” or “Us” (aka Jehovah and who’s different from Elohim or El, the plural “Gods Club of El”), and so now this Yahweh deity creates Adam on the 8th day, and then the plants and animals after him. This “God” tells Adam to name the plants and animals that were made for him and after him and to work the soil and take care of the garden. Then he eventually makes “Eve” from Adam’s rib, as a partner for Adam because all the animals made weren’t impressing Adam as potential partners. You know this ridiculous fairy story already probably…

Right this way, step right up folks! Amazing miracle cures plus…The 4-Legged Woman, The Camel Girl, Elastic Man, The Feejee Mermaid, Jo-Jo the Dog-Faced Boy, Lobster Boy and the Incredible Bearded Lady! C’mon in and see the holy ghost in action and remember to affix suffcient postage.

…But this is totally completely different from the “earlier” Genesis 1 “Elohim/Gods” plural account you just read seconds earlier. What the hell is going on here? Is there an interdimensional time warp taking place? You can’t write a book like that and hope to sell lots of copies of the book using this formula right from the start, right from the start in the very frst 2 chapters and there’s already 2 contradictory creation stories giving opposite information, (it’s not just different information but irreconcilable opposite information). The first chapter version has the planet being nothing but water at first and then the dry land appeared coming up after, the other 2nd chapter version has it that the earth was all just dry dusty land and then water and rain was made to appear afterwards to water the land, one version that humanoid kind was made male and female on the 6th day, but the other version that Adam was made on the 8th day then the animals and then Eve afterwards using that old rib magic trick. That’s probably why a lot of these types have sidekicks on television, someone to laugh at all their jokes, agree with everything they say, someone to “ooooh” and “aaaah” and “amen”, to repeat what they say, slap their thighs, nod and agree and chuckle, or just sit contemplatively looking into the camera nodding and saying “Glory Be call the number on your screen”…Why? What for? What are we gonna talk about the weather, recipes, fashions, moisturizing cream, illegal migration or the economy? I don’t talk about the weather, recipes or economy with absolute complete strange weirdos trying to mind control brainwash people.

Biblical scholars and apologists agree that probably 2 out of 3 prayers to God and Jesus get answered (especially with added faith shekels seeds). Thank & Praizzze Gawd GLO-RY!

God Said It…I Believe It…That Settles It…as the saying goes which makes absolutely no sense. With faith seeds and faith of a mustard seed and other mystical mumbo jumbo, the master of the whole universe and Alabama will forsake saving the world to instead saving your personal pointless world, 10 million children under the age of 5 die every year but dang that Holy Ghost sure comes in handy sometimes especially at sports and lotteries. He will become your very own imaginary playmate, personal genie, divine psychiatrist and cosmic butler speaking personally to just you because you’re a real somebody now and mean something special, amen to that. Praizzze Gawd! (And the holy ghost will help your earned run average and golf game too, it’s a proven fact). God: “Sorry kid I’m busy and can’t help you, I gotta arrange a miracle fumble and a miraculous botched throw to 1st to win the series, and someone needs to pass their geography and math exam”.

…Did one god (“God’s” actually like I said) make most of mankind and then another god make just Adam and Eve and his offspring? or vice versa? It sure seems like it, because the original Hebrew text in the 2 versions is verily speaking of 2 distinct and different creations with different events taking place in very different chronological orders, 2 Creation stories truthfully talking about 2 completely different creations according to the text, there’s no other way to explain it, either that or the writers of the text and/or god is mentally retarded. Also, what sort of all-knowing super-duper genius being deity gives rules about right and wrong/good and evil to some newly created humanoids who don’t even understand the concept of right and wrong in the first place? Whose newly made fresh minds would have no clue about what good or bad is or following rules much like 2 year olds in an amusement park, Heck I’m surprised they didn’t walk into the river and drown trying to pet the crocodiles, and then even tempt and tease them with a yummy fruited tree, even plant the tree right in front of their noses in the very middle of the garden? That’s just dumb, and why make a serpent with a most wise cunning mind with even the ability to talk and reason anyway? And what’s up with all that “Adam where are you? Who told you that…bla bla bla?” nonsense? This “all-knowing” being didn’t know what was going on or where Adam was or who told them things or that there was a talking snake in his very own garden in the first place? And strangely it wouldn’t have known what was going to happen in the first place beforehand? (And I find it very hard to believe that the snake could have been hiding in the bushes the whole time, or in a cave or a hole in the ground, that’s just impossible to be such a good hide ‘n seeker, there’s just no way I’ll believe that nonsense). Tempting freshly made minds that don’t even comprehend right and wrong with a yummy fruit tree is just plain dumb and asking for trouble. This supposed most powerful smartest thing in the universe being in the story doesn’t come across very all-powerful or “all-knowing” smart at all, he got easily duped and undercut by a serpent that he made and he didn’t see it coming according to the text. (If anything, knowing that it was the “Elohim” (plural gods/powers) in the Hebrew text who created the humans races, then it seems much more probable that it was the Anunnaki who did the creating, because they are the oldest primordial line of deities recorded regarding the very beginnings of humans and life on the planet, from the time that the earth was still formless and void, the Elohim would equate to being the gods Anunnaki and the
Epic of Gilgamesh then being the origins of a Garden of Eden and future flood and boat stories…which it is.

Drown the bastards, smite and kill em’ all because…well…just because. (Rule #1: When in doubt or you screwed up the recipe large just smite em’ all and start over just like baking a cake, it’s God’s Way and the right smartest thing to do). Btw, this image is actually a real painting that is on display at the Creation and Noah’s Ark Museum in Glen Rose, Texas and not a joke to ridicule the feeble-minded or gullible, it could quite possibly even be a portrayal of the part where the Nephilim snuck onto the boat when Noah was gathering the penguins and stegosaurus’ (that’s how they made it to the “Promised Land” again before the Israelites, it’s the only explanation).

It should also be noted that the ancient “Old Europe” populations and societies, and the earliest Croats and their descendants, are not included as part of the biblical mythological “table of nations” list nor are they included as a part of any genealogy or chronology belonging to any Noah character in the book of Genesis. Facts and even the biblical mythology and calculated timetable show that Old Europe populations never experienced any cataclysmic flood but were instead descendants of other pre-flood populations not accounted for in the book of Genesis during Noah’s time, this would include of course Croatians, the Veneti, Balts, other later Slavic languages speaking peoples, Germanic people, Celts and any others who lived in Europe and all Eurasia around 2400 BCE. The very text of the bible excludes them as being any imaginary offspring from a fictitious Noah character and instead makes us a continuation of a pre-flood world and populations, which in reality is the case. They would actually never have been flooded nor did the populations living there ever come to an end being all destroyed, as much as this upsets bible believers, as their descendants are still here today (including me) and proven through DNA and physical and arcaeological evidences and remains. (aka the Antediluvian world by biblical sources proponents). They would not have suffered any cataclysmic flood nor were their lands affected by any all life-destroying flooding, and the reasons supporting this fact are quite simple and irrefutable (experiencing Ice Ages yes but no sudden cataclysmic flooding). Even the dating of Noah’s flood by biblical scholars using their very own biblical calculations and chronology is only to around 2400 BCE, and so any archaeological and material findings in large parts of Europe would then all have to have happened after the flood according to this timetable and belief/philosophy, believing that only populations that migrated there after Noah and the flood left behind artifacts. However this is absurd as any scientist and archaeologist will tell and show you. Without even getting into the totally mind-boggling absurd mathematics and science behind easily debunking the fable, such as the making of the huge watertight ark by just a few sheepherder guys in the iron age, all the animals from around the world, the food, feces and air needed to survive (the ark had only one 2 ft sqaure window, they would have all died of methane gas exposure in no time..p.u!), it having to have rained almost 30 feet of water per hour for 40 days when a heavy downpour is about 1-2 inches per hour, so even the wooden ark itself would have been bombarded like a catterpillar walking on a rock under Niagara Falls, etc, etc, etc. The mythological “Table of Nations” scenario is a fiction basically invented by minds with personal agendas (modern day fundamentalists and gurus will try to connect many modern nations as being descendants of and springing forth from a Noah character, but it’s just fiction based on even more fiction stories, it makes for amusing movies but that’s about it). This is a fact, the Genesis “table of nations” text EXCLUDES any populations in Europe and Eurasia because the pre-flood populations living there never experienced any cataclysmic flood but continue to this day and their physical remains are still being discovered today. Reality 1..Desert cave invented fables 0. (There are even 2 contradictory Flood stories in the Hebrew Torah and Bible even to this day, which many don’t know about or want to talk about probably because it complicates the plot in movies and films and action figure toys. Another case in point to ponder…is it 2 of each animal or 7 pairs (14 animals) that went on the ark?

We know because it’s been proven that a number of plot themes, plot elements and characters in the ancient Mesopotamian Epic of Gilgamesh (circa. 2100 BCE) only much later came to be used and incorporated in the personalized myths and fables of numerous Canaanite and other people’s cults in the Levant/Middle East, including most notably in the later Abrahamic religions – especially the accounts of the Garden of Eden, Tower of Babel and Genesis Flood myths narratives. Each cultic center and tribal people personalized them for their own purposes, these myths and fables were very popular with the various emerging cults at that time because of the various action, drama, romance, zany suspense (some suspension of disbelief also of course) and some wow elements which really impressed the camel cowboys and shepherds, sort of like Thanos saving Doctor Strange and his family but drowning the rest. Example: “Look Noah’s safe on that boat with 14 of each animal but we and all our babies and children and the bunnies and ponies are going to drown on this rock!”…WOW!…see what I mean? It doesn’t get much more zanier suspense than that. (and besides, according to the narrative entirely killing the various humanoids populations is one thing, but why the horses, bunnies, kittens, deers, ducks, and all the other animals also, just what the heck kind of reasoning and logic exactly is behind killing all the animals in the world? What the heck did they do?, that’s animal cruelty probably. For a remarkable detailed recreation of the sound during the deluge click here, amazing!). It seems most people have been so desensitized to this Noah and the Ark story, and other stories, that they don’r really even think about what they’re hearing or reading, think about it, if the Devil/Satan character had sent torrential rains and floods to wipe out and drown all the babies, children, people and innocent animals in the entire world, televangelists would have a field day joyously and constantly pointing out how corrupted, evil and despicable he was that he even killed all the innocent animals, children, babies and humanoids…”Do you see?! it’s written right there!, he’s a despicable murderous killing evil killer Devil GLO-RY!” (Besides, Geez talk about overcompensating, don’t quote me on this but this may very well be the origins from where the later popularly used term “Fuck The World” came from). But even more weird, strange and funny is that afterwards this God admits he made a mistake and that the flood was actually pointless and it didn’t really solve anything or change anything at all, in the story he admits he screwed up and all the flood killing was a bonehead decision, so it was basically just all for nothing…lol, great going GENIUS!

…Make up your mind whoever wrote these bizarre dumb stories. (clean and unclean animals??? Holy Moly, what does that even mean exactly in the context of burnt offerings??? unclean burning animal hair smells different or their burning carcass looks nicer? Some animals are more holier than others?, then it’s no great bonus being a clean holy animal that’s for sure. Why even make/invent unclean animals in the first place if you can’t even burn them accordingly, or eat them, they’re pointless to even invent and save on the boat then, and also why the deranged obsessive fixation with constantly demanding to have animals burned as a sacrifce for him anyway? This is the most perfect wise being or thing in the entire universe and sounds like satisfactory logical demands?…”Burn all these such and such animals for me I tell you, their blood and burning carcasses aromas please me to my nostrils!”…sniiiiiffff…Waaaa?). It would actually have to be 7 pairs of clean animals and not just 1 pair if Noah immediately performed many more animal sacrifces/burnt offerings to his God after landing the ark as per instructions by his god, otherwise lots of species would have gone extinct almost immediately, Noah was told by his God right after the flood to immediately go and burn as an offering…get this….1 OF EVERY CLEAN ANIMAL. (The extra pairs of clean animals would then logically be needed and put on the ark not to save them but instead specifically for later burnt offering sacrifces by Noah as instructed by his god, because the flood didn’t kill enough clean and unclean animals obviously, but mainly because if you burn even just one clean cow or sheep or goat or chicken/bird after leaving the ark, then they’re automatically immediately extinct. Burning even just one of each clean animal as instructed by Noah’s God would have meant extinction, it would have meant only vegetarians from that time forward. The 7 pairs of animals were specifically required solely for 1 reason and one reason only, so as to sacrificially burn them later).

“Every Day A Friday” – Joel Olsteen. Wow so epic, deep and evocatively compelling while wiping your ass on the shitter on a Tuesday. With a book title like that you know it’s just more bullshit on top of other bullshit. Every day is NOT a Friday in the real world or my world, everyone knows that and every calendar in the world can’t be wrong and just him right. Pulling book titles and sermon topics out of thin air using just invented abstract concepts and imaginary ideas not based on the real world is just so easy like I said. Why is he always looking at the ceiling anyway? Is there a big huge spider up there or is it verily raining Benjamin Franklins again? Besides how pathetic and despicable, always using other people’s quotes to sound deep and real (feel free to retweet that).

Let me expound even a little more on this particular dumb biblical fairy tale story, since it is so important to all 3 Abrahamic religions just as the whole Genesis fairy tale, as well as their shows/movies and action figure toys and posters, It shows just how absurd and ridiculous supposed bible scholars even these days are when they attempt to explain things and make the reader out to be some moron idiot. Take a look below at the internet example of the supposed “logic” used in trying to explain away the obvious contradictions that are written right there in front of everyone to read (and actually putting words into his god’s mouth in the process to explain the contradictory mistake and then update the contradictory information with their subterfuge smoke and mirrors double talk “logic” of absurdity, what else is new). Here’s just one example of bizarro-logic mental gymnastics explaining obvious plain to read contradictory information by using added bizarro-basic math mumbo jumbo to contradict what is written…

In my math world 1 pair does not mean 7 pairs and vice versa, 2=2 and 14=14, and 7-1 still leaves ONLY 6 pairs, that’s just the way I roll. (during a math test it’s not “what is only 2 + 5?…15 because it didn’t say only 5). Only people with selective, source and systemized amnesia believe it’s 1 pair and 7 pairs being the same thing, (just like the text excerpts saying it rained for 40 days, but also that it rained for 150 days), a very common problem when reading biblical material actually as more examples will be discussed. Besides all the proven contradictions and improbabilities of this event ever having taken place in real life in the real world and real universe, even just the very basic general premises of this farcical myth are so ludicrous that only feeble-minded shmucks would believe it to be true, such as Ken Ham being just one example (see 39 Problems with the Noah’s Ark story).

It’s obvious that the above biblical “scholar” is incapable of performing the most rudimentary and simplest of math, and that after graduating from their seminary they still don’t know how to read and understand a very basic sentence, such as “…of “every” living thing….bring “two” of every kind” and then “of every clean animal by sevens”. It’s obvious this seminary scholar should never work at a job that requires reading and following basic instructions as well as performing simple grade 3 math also. Heck, they would screw up making a can of soup, get all confused regarding amounts, measurements and ingredients, then start making up different scenarios to cover over the blatantly obvious mistakes/contradictions of the soup company. If the soup can label required to add a 1/2 can of milk and 1/2 can of water, they would play god and make up their own instructions and then imply that this is what was really meant and not what’s written on the soup can label (aka charlatan mental gymnastics apologetics). Probably just add a whole can of milk instead, why?…As in “Why did you add a whole can of milk instead of 1/2 water and 1/2 milk as per the soup can label you blithering scoundrel knave?”…..”Well, I used simple logic chef because it’s plain to see, because milk is verily mostly just water anyway, after all it doesn’t say it’s “only” just water, therefore both halves are really just talking about milk.” The above biblical scholar “logic” has explained the soup instructions contradictions and soup company label mistake, well done, bravo. (the pigeon and falcon both have feathers, so they’re also both really just pigeons, you can extend this absurd math and reading logic to the number of eggs or cups of sugar in recipes or what 2 + 8 is if you want). I’m not going to even touch the answers I came across where the bible expert out of the seminary was also “explaining” (lol, gotta love invented abstract concepts) how the dinosaurs would have easily fit into the ark etc. (one explanation is that most of them were still in their eggs, you might as well believe in talking donkeys and snakes then). I don’t go that far into the realm of the bizarro and absu